No Off Season 4 Dads

It is hard to put a number on how many mothers are involved in their child's education. And although there are fathers who are as well, it is not as prevalent as moms. Take a listen as Dijon briefly talks about four ways to be present in your child's education this upcoming school year.

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There are so many ways to show love to your children.  Demonstrating love to your adult children is a little more challenging becuase they are most likely out of the house.  Listen to tips that I have gleaned over time on how to show that needed love.

References:

The Bible -- 3 John 4

The Resolution for Men by Stephen & Alex Kendrick

365 Ways to Love Your Child: Turning Little Moments Into Lasting Memories by Julie Lavender

Being able to have adult conversations with your adult children must start when they are younger.  However, the conversations can be life changing for them...and you.  Listen to Dijon as he talks on this topic.

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Everyone has had a father figure in their life.  Prayerfully, he was present, but unfortunately I understand that was not always the case. What lessons, be them positive or negative did you learn from your father?  And how have those lessons impacted you today as a person, father, husband, friend, employee or employer, etc.  Listen as Dijon talks about some of the lessons he learned from his dad.  

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Listen to some tips, some familiar and more novel) on raising our children in 2022.  

1.  Hug Your Children Daily  

2.  Talk & Listen with an Open Mind

3.  Allow a Controlled Freedom

4.  Treat & Respect Them for their Age

5.  Loosen the Leash

6.  Be consistent and Persistent in Your Love

7.  Pray for Them & You

Additional Resource:  The Angst of Adolescence by Sara Villanueva, PhD

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Investing in anything takes time and effort.  It takes a level of concentrating on a single item to ensure that it gives a return.  Why not invest in your child, especially in their faith.  Take a listen to Dijon as he gives some keys on how to do this.

How do you ensure a strong, mentally healthy family?  Listen in as we had the founders from the Renew and Revitalize Marriage & Family Institute as our guests.  Our guests were Dr. Jendayo Grady, Carissa Oyebanjo, LCPC, and Dr. Paula Anderson.  

The mental health of a family is so important to focus on.  As parents, it is our responsibility to ensure that everyone living under our roof is either mental healthy or has the resources to improve their mental health. 

Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter at No Off Season 4 Dads (@NOS4Dads).  Listen. Engage. Share. Fund. Enjoy. Repeat.

Notes:

www.renewandrevitalize.org

Podcast produced by dijondabassman in Studio NOS

Interlude music by dijondbassman

For the People (Instrumental) by Pete Rock

Move On Up by Curtis Mayfield

I spoke about independence previously (episode 6), but growth, life, and other circumstances made me revisit the topic.  Watching my boys put together IKEA furniture was another level in their growth, especially for me to see.  I truly believe that releasing the 'leash' on our children is essential in their growth.  You're going to have to let it go anyway.  

Take a listen as I talk about releasing the leash and how an IKEA furniture piece  helped me to realize that.  Listen.  Enjoy. Share. Fund. Repeat.  Also, follow us on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at No Off Season 4 Dads (NOS4Dads).

Produced and edited in Studio NOS.

Music produced by dijondabassman.

Samples from Mood4Eva (Instrumental) by Beyonce'.

Additional sponsors:  Renew and Revitalize Marriage & Family Institute  (www.renewandrevitalize.org/counseling)

I am entering a new phase of life.  I am old enough to have an adult son.  This means that my parenting is going to have to be a bit different.  My style and delivery has to be different.  However, principles stay the same.  I am sure that many of you are in this phase of life as well.  These are simply perspectives that I am currently learning and will continue to mature in as the days go on.  

Thoughts?!?

"Your job is to set the limit, not to control how your child feels about it or reacts to it." -- Sara Bean, M.D.

I really don't understand how such a powerful word is only two letters.  I know my parents had to use it with me as I grew up, but I don't think I realized how hard it could be for me as a father to use that word with my own children.  It's a simple, yet very complex word, filled with emotions and consequences, some of which are good and some that are bad.  Take a listen as Dijon speaks to this dynamic word and how to manage using it with your child.

References:  parentinghighschoolers.com & empoweringparents.com

Credits:  

Intro music and beats produced by dijondabassman

Mood 4 Eva (Instrumental) performed by Beyonce

The World Is Yours (Instrumental) performed by NAS

Anyone who has trained for an event knows that it takes a lot of time -- months and even years.  Training a child takes an entire lifetime! Take a moment to listen to Dijon as he talks about a popular Bible verse in a life perspective.  You don't have to be religious to get this proverb.  

Interlude music by dijondbassman

For the People (Instrumental) by Pete Rock

Mood 4 Eva (Instrumental) by Beyonce'

Raising teens can be a beautiful endeavor and sometimes an incredible challenge.  Raising teens in our modern day world is even more difficult.  Not only do we deal with their ever-changing personalities, we also have to be aware of the media that floods their world daily, especially as it relates to their technology.  Smartphones have taken over the way a teen views the world.  And with thee smartphones are also the potential casualties of sexualized media, ones that we are aware of and others that we are not.  

I was recently a panelist speaking about how to raise teenagers in a highly sexualized, digital world.  I wanted to continue that conversation.  Let's take a listen as I chat in The New Lounge with Abou Djaouga, Lanre Oyebanjo, Raynold Mensah, and Eric Henderson.  All of these men are very well accomplished in their line of work, but they are even more incredible fathers...and fathers of teens.  

Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter at @No Off Season 4 Dads (NOS4Dads).  Listen. Engage. Share. Fund. Enjoy. Repeat.

Music Credits:  The World is Yours (Instrumental) -- NAS; 'Mood 4 Eva' (Instrumental) -- Beyonce; Interludes created by dijondabassman.

Resources:  

Every Young Man's Battle by Stephen Arterburn

Every Young Woman's Battle by Shannon Ethridge and Stephen Arterburn

You have to go back and listen to Part 1 if you haven't already.  The conversation was lively with Kelvin Coleman and Dr. Doran Gresham.  Both are very successful men, but even better fathers.  In this episode, we talked about our fathers and how they influenced our parenting.  We talked about careers, schools, and even gave some key advice around the end.  All that being said, take a listen.  Listen. Share. Fund. Enjoy. Repeat.

Credits:  'Move On Up' (Instrumental) -- Curtis Mayfield; 'For The People' (Instrumental) -- Pete Rock; Musical interludes -- dijondabassman

What choices have you made over the course of your life that have had a positive influence on you and the ones you love?  How about the choices that were not the wisest?  Our choices lead to action.  All of our choices have consequences, be it positive or negative.  

Take a listen as Dijon chats about how we should consider our choices and the influence it has on those we love.  

Sound bytes:  The World Is Yours by Nas

Book reference:  Bringing Up Boys by Dr. James Dobson

I had a rude awakening recently as I received my physical test results in the mail.  It shocked me because I figured that I was a seemingly very healthy man, excluding my obsessive love for donuts and chips.  The results from my physical opened my eyes and brought a deeper awareness to my own humanity -- that I need to take better care of myself.  But I never would have known that if I did not go to the doctor.

Men typically don't like going to the doctor until something is wrong.  We might need to change our mindsets and go to the doctor while we believe everything is okay.  We get our oil changed every 3,000 miles.  We clean our HVAC systems to keep the air clean in the home.  Why not put even more attention to our bodies?  I spoke to a similar topic in episode 14, but it is coming full circle again.  Listen to a perspective from my recent visit to the doctor.  See if you can relate.  Let's chat about it.

My two sons and my wife are having a fun time learning and growing their financial portfolio.  I am having...a time as well.  Understanding the market can be complex.  The thoughts of saving, investing, losing and gaining can take you for a roller coaster ride.  However, it is a conversation that can be had with our children from a young age all the way up to they prepare to leave the house.  

Join Dijon as he has a real talk on the conversations of investing.  Lend your thoughts.  

I never really wanted to talk on this subject.  I always found it to be morbid and dreary.  However, as I get older and somewhat wiser, I see the need to ensure that my family is taken care of in case something happens to me.  There are homes, bank accounts, social media sites, careers, 401K's, and the list goes on -- all of these matter to you and will matter to your family.  

Take a listen to what Dijon has been thinking about on the matter of estate planning and for that matter, what you as a father should be thinking about as well.  

January 6, 2021 -- A day that will go down in history as one of the worst on American soil.  Men and women stormed the Capitol building in hopes to protest the presidential election results.  However, that protest turned ugly in a hurry.  We all watched it.  And so did our children.  What are your emotions?  And what are their emotions about what was seen?  Listen to Dijon as he gives some insights and pointers on how to speak with your children from this vivid moment in our nation's history. 

2021 is upon us.  So many of us are making resolutions to improve ourselves.  Why not make having a greater level of fitness a lifestyle?  Not a resoulution, but a lifestyle.  Listen to Dijon as he chats on concepts of prepping your body for a lifestyle of fitness.  Hear key strategies to accomplish these goals and the benefits of having a level of physical fitness.  Leave your comments as well.

I had to feverishly clean my kitchen because something spilled out in the cabinet.  It got all over the shelves.  Once I cleaned inside the pantry, I had to clean behind the pantry, and then the refrigerator.  It was yucky and time consuming.

Every now and then we need to do the same thig to our hearts.  And we have to help our children unfold the caked layers that are in theirs as well.  Listen in as we give a chat about 'cleaning the house.'

If you are like me, you have children in your home that are sick and tired of being inside from Covid-19.  The restrictions that different states and countries are putting into play are creating an environment for safety, but also an environment that our children, especially teens, are simply not used to.  Let's listen as Dijon discusses how reasoning with your teen may benefit their outlook on hanging out with friends and Covid.

Friends--how many of us have them? Friends--ones we can depend on?  There is a big difference between having friends and having trustworthy friends.  There are those who you can chill in front of the TV watching a basketball game.  However, there are real friends that you can share the innermost parts of you.  Fathers, we need these.  We need trustworthy relationships that we can bounce ideas off of for parenting, marriage, and just everyday life issues.  Oftentimes, men don't expose the inner parts of themselves because we feel it can show weakness, but it is crucial for our growth as men and as fathers.

Take a listen as Dijon gives some insight into why having trustworthy relationships is vital for our everyday lives, especially as it relates to our parenting.  

Song Credit:  'Friends' by Whodini

Book Reference:  'Four Pillars of a Man's Heart:  Bringing Strength Into Balance' by Stu Weber

Our children are growing up faster than we did.  Technology, culture, and science has propelled them forward quicker than us.  It's important for us to have a handle on the times and gain understanding and different perspectives from others.  The variety of perspectives can greatly influence the way we carefully parent our own children.  Take a listen with Dijon as he discusses some resources to help us in our parenting.  As dads, you have to remember, you have No Off Season!

Books references:

The Wonder of Boys by Michael Gurian, Ph.D

The Circle Maker by Mark Batterson

Praying Circles Around Your Children by Mark Batterson

Preparing for Adolescence by Dr. James Dobson

Bringing Up Boys by Dr. James Dobson

Of Thee I Sing by Barack Obama

A Raisin in the Sun by Lorraine Hansberry

The Opposite of Spoiled - -Raising Kids Who Are Grounded, Generous, and Smart About Money by Ron Lieber

Mom...Dad...when can I have a girlfriend?  Are you ready for that question?  The question and conversation has come up in our home on different occasions, sometimes in a joking manner and others not.  Dads, how do you handle the conversation?  Do you embrace it or divert it?  Do your teens feel comfortable talking with you about such a sensitive topic to them?  Listen and engage as we talk on a perspective of teen dating.  

Music credits:

Prince -- Girls and Boys

Force MD's -- Tender Love

How many times do you go to a PTA or either sponsored school event and you notice tons of mothers, but a slim picking of fathers?  I want to be a present voice in my children's education.  Listen to a few tips on how fathers can make this happen.  

The home is a beautiful place to go after work or school, or to unwind after a long day.  However, that home has to be maintained.  Living with my family, The A4 Squad, we have come up with a system to encourage, engage, and put more responsibilities on everyone in the house to upkeep it.  Listen in on a few tips on how to get that done.  

Cultivating independence in your child is not something that happens overnight.  It is a process that involves building trust through a continuous series of developmental situations and opportunities.  Listen in for the next 10 minutes on ways to help cultivate that environment.

Starting out in the Boogie Down Bronx, hip hop has morphed throughout the ages as a premier music genre.  Hip hop has generated many arguments on who is the best, what cut was the best, who could flow the best, and so on.  There is just not enough time to dive so deep into this musical subject.  Let's hear a perspective on how we've been influenced by hip hop culture.  And I am sure that you have your own perspective.  

Question:  Who is the best hip hop artist?

Music sample credits:  

Grandmaster Flash & The Furious Five -- The Message

Heavy D & The Boys -- Blue Funk

A Tribe Called Quest -- Awards Tour

Real As It Gets -- Jay Z (featuring Young Jeezy)

Kendrick Lamar -- Alright

Lil Baby, Gunna, & Drake -- Never Recover

Megan Thee Stallion (featuring Beyonce') -- Savage Remix

The ideals of 'freedoms' being taken from a teen during Covid-19 (aka...Coronacation) has challenged our children to their very core.  Listen as we think about a perspective that can help us help them.

These words have stuck in my head for years as I grappled with how to prepare my sons for a life outside of our home.  Listen to the story of how this phrase helped change my parenting.

The lessons of working hard can last a life time.  Journey with Dijon as he chats about working as a teen and the benefits it gives today.  

Living in the same house with my gorgeous wife and two other men (my boys) has been an absolute blast.  In the same way, I have had to learn how to have different discussions with my men.