10 Things We Hate About Your Movie

Even more destinationy than the previous 4. Death really doesn't make a whole lot of sense in this movie... He (or she but probably not) gives obvious hints to the people that cheated him. Is he just playing with his food? Is that how we're going to explain this cash-grab garbage? Also, 16 bit Mortal Kombat called and its wants it's fatalities back... I am right? Anyway, I think Nick drops the "R" word in this one, so just listen.

5ths in a franchise continues with Resident Evil: Retribution. Some of us enjoyed it more than others and Justin struggles with it. Like a lot. He gets very upset and offended. Its kind of weird that he's so passionate about hating this movie. It's not the worse thing we've ever watched. Hell, it's better than "Fear". That movie was awful. Anyway... Chase nerds out a little and has some Chase hates.

Cuz of May the fifth be with you or something. Anyway, we're doing 5ths in a franchise. Starting with the greatest 5 of all time with the exception of the Jacksons. Whatever happened to the family music groups? The partridge family, the Osmonds, Gladys and her pips, Hanson.... The Skywalkers!? See.. I brought it back. Imagine DV, Leia, Luke in a singing trio? Just listen, please.

Fear? More like Smear? Am i right? This movie... I'm glad Reesepril is over with this abandoned rotting leprosatic limb of a movie. nailed it. At least Reese finally gets called out for her slutty makeup. Who hasn't had that conversation before? Also, Marky Mark is this for some reason and you get to see the origins of films like "the happening", "three kings", "planet of the apes"... you get it. he's bad. Oh he was also in the Lovely Bones.. Don't get me started on that gross terrible film.

Aprispoon month continues. You know, the month of Reese Witherspoon movies. This one is gross. A lot of Epstein vibes. A Dan Schneider joint.. am i right? Why is Selma Blair special needs? Doesn't make sense. Makes everything so much worse. Plenty to hate.

April is Reese Witherspoon month.. Obviously. Reesepril or Apreese? Maybe Aprilspoon? It doesn't matter. We'll run a contest to name the month or something. Probably not though. We're not really engaged like that. Anyway, listen to the last hates. We troll Justin. Enjoy!

The name says it all.. Ninjas ninjaing on the surf. It tells the story of Ernie Reyes Jr's early life, his search for his origins, and his clairvoyant brother's struggle with dyslexia. Its a fun one with a young Rob Schneider and a 20-something Tone Loc battling wits. High kicks and high laughs highlight this coming of age. Listen, won't you?

Marchial Arts month continues with Kiss of the Dragon. Just a few months before 9/11, the movie, Kiss of the Dragon, graced the silver screen. Jet Li plays an agent for the CCP to help stop heroin smuggling in France, and saves a midwestern american and her daughter from a life of prostitution. Also, acupuncture needles that paralyze and kill. Almost had a real fun movie. Justin hated it because of his issues with the french. Listen and you'll like it.

It's Marchial Arts! We combined the month of March with Martial Arts. Its a play-on-words. So we're watching movies with Martial Arts in them. Now that we've established the theme, here's a description: The Orient God of Thunder is french, the 4-armed alien speaks like he's an urban american, a slave skeleton ninja annunciates like Michael Buffer, and EDM. Good Ol' fashion american/french/asian martial arts fun. It takes a planet.

A marvel movie to round out Shane Black History Month. Also, the resident marvel fan, Chaseface, not available.. So, Justin and Nick gut through this one the best they can... This movie's audience is very unclear. Is it for 12 year olds who like comic book movies or 20-somethings looking for a role model that's a bigger douche than they are? No one knows.. But one thing is clear, they made 3 of these movies not including all the MCU movies that included Iron Man. Thats what you get by constantly shelling out money for these things.. Stop it. Anyway, enjoy.

Shane Black History Month continues with Monster Squad. A feel good romp for the whole family. Because the monsters are very inadequate as monsters. But good ol' fashioned 80s dialogue and teenage horniness. Chase has a zinger. worth a listen. Also, for some reasons Nazis come up... And for the record Nazis are bad. I know how sensitive people are to Nazi talk.

Continuing Shane Black history month with a classic Christmas story about a man down on his luck (his wife died). The only thing that keeps him going is an older black man and his weird family. We're still having technical challenges, but at least Chaseface showed up at the end to add nothing. This is all we have.. Enjoy!

It's John-Woo-ary. Its like January but with an asian... JCVD classic. The muscles from Brussels with a leg that's registered as a lethal weapon. The diabetes guy is in this.. Also, unions are a big fat scam. If it wasn't for the union, JCVD would have had work and wouldn't have had to help a random lady with his fighting and motorcycle skills. Justin tries his best in this one.. and its not good. Remember kids, shoot first and roundhouse kick later.... Chase hates included. Enjoy!

A special guest for a mediocre (at best) Christmas movie. Its not as good as you remember... But its Christmas, so whatever..

A Justin request. Justin's home in the 1990's exclusively played TBS. TBS played a lot of Saved by the Bell i.e. Justin loves Saved by the bell... Its fun but plenty to hate!

A holiday classic... Too good to hate? Maybe a little..

That is correct... We watched TS Eras Tour: The Movie. It was out of obligation. May God forgive us for our sins.. Anyways, we have a special guest. Just listen to it.

Chaseface choice... He wants to stay relevant in social circles so Paul Reubens dies and now we're watching Pee-wee. It's fine... A couple of us are passionate about this film on one extreme or another. Pee-wee is kind of a dick... Just sayin and is asexual at best. Although, it has alamo jokes. Kids today don't even know what the alamo is.. Thats worth a watch. P.S. terrible episode..

One of the greatest satires of our time... No, but can be hilarious if viewed in the right lens. Justin always goes straight for gross-out sex jokes... He's like a bad female comedian..Seriously.. Sometimes he hits a funny one. Like 1 out of 10. I'd give him a 5 on this one. It's probably the divorce... So now I feel bad. Anyway, Demolition Man. Listen and love it!

No Chase equals episode off the rails.. Nick and Justin go off script so prepare yourself. It's terrible. So much to love so much to hate. Why is schizophrenia mixed with drugs and homelessness relevant? "Where are the guns!?" Justin asks.. a lot.. Another ginger, another ruined character.. Listen to it

What do happy people and this episode have in common? ....No Chase... Got 'em. But we have a special guest and you still have Nick and Justin. Beethoven? not that bad. Although... questionable age gaps in that family. *spoiler alert* The dog has magic powers. Also, Helen Hunt or Bonnie Hunt, who ya got? If you choose Helen, well, then you are stupid.

Snoozers... Reginald VelJohnson only plays a cop ever... Well... in his off-time he plays a dad. This is just one big cliché... Also, there's more peanut butter talk. Justin's obsessed with Tom Hanks' bulge.. That's all he talk about, seriously.. I wish I would have counted how many times he mentioned his cock outline in his man panties. Just listen to say you did..

Nick didn't watch this hunk of crap... Thank god.. Shannon Elizabeth is in it and she's hot, right? I think so... Justin doesn't care for her. Kind of strange.. You'd think he'd take anything he can get these days, but he's very particular. I'm not sure he could do better than Shannon but maybe she's aged poorly or is insufferable... Anyways, 13 ghosts. You're gonna hate it.

Why does Nick get on his high horse? F*ckin Deerhunter? Seriously... Thank god for Samuel L. Jackson and Kevin's dad. Why would criminals, even juvenile ones, shave their head in a stolen car right before they are going to commit a one eight seven? Also, Chase watched this one so.. prepare yourself.. Chase Hates... Enjoy!

Why is Michael Rapaport in anything? The XFL is a pipe dream and everyone knows it.... Why are frosted tips relevant? How about a ReWife? Am I right? Why does Terry Crews hang around weak men and a terrible lady henchman? Tune in to find out...

July is numbers month... We wanted to do Jew-ly and watch jew movies but chase (of course) chose numbers.. 2 hours of commentary on a bad action blockbuster. Why is Randy Newman relevant? Guess who didn't watch? Another Justin and Nick episode.. Good luck getting through it..

Who picked this movie? Who didn't show up? Who has the face only Rocky Dennis could love? And honestly who gives a f*ck? Lots of sideways rants and off-topic shenanigans in this one. If John Hughes was alive, would you let him babysit your children overnight? That's called a litmus test for CPS. Listen to it. Its a long one but a good one... says John hughes to adolescent teens. Boom roasted.

Chase loves it... So prepare yourselves.. Its a Chase episode. We're bringing "Tranny" back. Or is it Trannie? Doesn't matter.. its fun to say. Does that make me a dick? Get it? cuz tranny. Also, the guy who tried to sabotage Kevin McAllister's New York christmas vacation is in it. Listen and enjoy

Who disagrees with the rules of this magic? Why is Subway Jared relevant? Did you see that documentary on him? That guy is a piece of garbage... Sick motherf*cker! Seriously.. the things he's recorded saying are just awful. Can we bring back firing squads for pedophiles? No? Why not? Probably cuz Epstein and all his buddies... Jared is almost as bad.. Lying about your relationship with food and tricking people to eat at subway is one of the worst things a person can do. Also, having Chaseface