The Domestic Violence Discussion

The Domestic Violence Discussion

By Glib
This is a discussion about all things domestic violence, from the perspective of a survivor. These are the things I wish I had known, and the discussions I wish someone had with me.

In this podcast, we'll cover everything from what domestic violence is, what it looks like, and how it affects not only survivors but the community they live in. By having these discussions, we can work towards breaking the cycle of violence. Welcome to the discussion.
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COVID19-4: 20-45

The Domestic Violence Discussion

COVID19-4: 20-45

The Domestic Violence Discussion

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S3, E6: What Is A Trigger?
The internet loves to label someone as TRIGGERED The colloquial internet definition has become shorthand for: I am upset But when discussing survivors of domestic violence, being triggered means something extremely different and a lot more nuanced And knowing what a trigger is, and how to respond can be the difference between supporting a survivor, or echoing their abuser. If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
23:27
August 10, 2020
S3, E5: Queen Nobles for Senate
Hey guys!  Couple announcements and an incredible guest interview! Once again, we are in voting season! For those of us who have mail in ballots, no excuses.  Time to get out out vote! And if you are looking for an incredible candidate who will be a fierce advocate for Washington... T’wina Nobles is running for State Senate in the 28th district.   Nobles is an advocate for representing, empowering, and elevating women and girls, especially young women of color.  She is the founder of Ladies First (@Ladies1stOrg) and if elected, will be the sole Black voice in the Washington State Senate.  We discuss her work with Ladies First, her reaction to the recent Black Lives Matter protests, and her thoughts around ¨Defund the Police.¨    Check out her website https://twinanobles.com/ and Twitter: @TwinaNobles If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
33:31
July 30, 2020
S3, E4: What is the Plan?
I want to share something I wish I had when I was leaving my abuser.  A safety plan.  Thinking back, this is one of the things I needed most.   Today, we talk about what a safety plan is and how to make your own.  If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
13:27
July 27, 2020
S3, E3: A Discussion with Sharlett Mena
In the next couple months, our nation will reach a critical moment that could redefine our lives for the next few years. We have an opportunity to voice our concerns about diminishing women's rights, channel our anger and frustration over our country's failure to reckon with White Supremacy, and reshape the governing body to those who we believe represent our values and morals. Today, a discussion with a candidate who´s issues reflect the intersection of homelessness, racism, immigration, and domestic violence.  Sharlett Mena is running for the 29th Legislative District in Washington State.   Find out more at her website https://www.sharlettmena.org/  Check her out on Instagram: @electsharlett and Twitter: @ElectSharlett
36:04
July 22, 2020
S3, E2: Where Can I Go?
As fond as we are of asking ¨Why doesn't she just leave?¨, it's hard to find shelter if you’re a domestic violence survivor. In the US, the first battered women's shelters did not exist before 1970.  Fast forward to 2020, and the demand still outweighs the available resources. The perception that finding emergency shelter is "easy" is dangerously misleading. Today we discuss the reality. If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
13:36
July 20, 2020
S3, E1: Who You Gunna Call?
Welcome back! This season we are going back to the basics, tackling questions about available resources for survivors and allies.  Questions such as, what is a Helpline?  What is a women's shelter?  How can I help?  Today, we are starting with all things Helpline.  What is it?  Who answers the phone?  Who is allowed to call?  Welcome back to season 3. If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
12:38
July 13, 2020
COVID19-7: Rachel Louise Snyder
In the season finale of our COVID19 season, we welcome special guest RACHEL LOUISE SNYDER. From Syder’s inclusion of the perpetrator’s perspective, to the question of accountability, to her unflinching view of our current administration’s influence on the domestic violence world, Snyder’s groundbreaking work tackles domestic violence as the multifaceted issue it is. Her delivery is matter of fact. Accessible. And Empathetic. She joins us today for a special discussion. No Visible Bruises was awarded the 2018 Lukas Work-in-Progress Award and was a 2019 finalist for the Kirkus Award, the National Book Critics Circle Award, the LA Times Book Award, and the New York Public Library's Bernstein Award for Excellence in Journalism.     If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
45:08
June 15, 2020
SPECIAL EPISODE: PRIDE with Dr. Sheena Howard
HAPPY PRIDE!!! Break out your rainbow flags and glitter because we are celebrating PRIDE with a special guest. Please welcome Dr. Sheena Howard for a discussion on her new novel “Nina’s Whisper”. “Nina’s Whisper” explores domestic violence in an LGBTQ relationship, an area that is severely underrepresented despite the fact that 44% of lesbians experience domestic violence. Read it.  Also, for every book sold, $1 is donated to Womanspace, a non-profit domestic violence organization. I hope this discussion inspires you, and challenges your idea of who can be a victim and who can be an abuser. And I hope this inspires more conversations about a public health crisis that is largely ignored. To learn more about Dr. Howard, check out her website: www.sheenachoward.com Visit her social media, Instagram @drsheenahoward and Twitter @Dr Sheena Howard If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
38:27
June 8, 2020
COVID19-6: Peloton
"A riot is the language of the unheard"
22:49
June 3, 2020
COVID19-5: 47% Positive Cases
Today, we check in with Angel Charley, Executive Director, and Curtison Badonie, Media & Communications Coordinator,  from the Coalition to Stop Violence Against Native Women.  We discuss how the COVID19 pandemic has effected Native communities and the unique challenges Native women are facing. Check out the CSVANW site for more information: link If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
18:08
June 1, 2020
COVID19-4: 20-45
The COVID19 crisis continues, erecting barriers for survivors. In particular, those seeking protection from abusers with deadly weapons.  Here in Washington State, there have been 3 domestic violence homicides in the last couple weeks. So what happens when lawmakers fail to provide emergency protections for survivors?   To read the original Proclamation: link Gov. Jay Inslee's statement: link Sen. Dhingra's statement: link Prosecutors and Police response: link Senator Mark Schoesler's response: link If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
44:41
May 26, 2020
COVID19-3: Rise of the Yellow Peril
The first anti immigration laws in the US prohibited the entry of Chinese Women. Chinese citizens were labeled a “yellow peril” and were considered an inferior race. Chinese children were barred from white schools, then later schooled under “separate but equal” laws. In the 1960’s, the stereotype of the “model minority” was minted and wielded as a weapon against Black Americans to oppose the activism of the Civil Rights Movement. Fast Forward to today. May, 2020. Asian Pacific Island Heritage Month (APIHM). This month, we celebrate APIHM against the backdrop of the COVID19 pandemic, where we are seeing an upswell of racism against Chinese Americans, and other people who are mistaken for Chinese. Today on the podcast, we welcome special guest Gina Loh of Domestic Violences Services of Snohomish County to unpack this history, and what the COVID19 pandemic reveals about how Asian American’s are viewed in this country. Check out Domestic Violence Services of Snohomish County https://dvs-snoco.org/ If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
39:28
May 18, 2020
COVID19-2:Cough, Bang, Boom: The intersection of guns, domestic violence, and COVID19
The mere presence of a gun in a domestic violence household increases the risk to the survivor by 500%. Guns are the most commonly used method of homicide in domestic violence murders. The number of domestic violence related murders using firearms increased by 26% from 2010 to 2017. So what do the spiking sales of guns during COVID19 mean for survivors already under lockdown with their abusers? Today we welcome special guest Katherine Thompson, CEO and Founder of IPV Educators to discuss the intersection of skyrocketing gun sales and the effect on survivors during the COVID19 pandemic.  ipveducators@gmail.com Twitter: @ ipveducators Website: http://www.ipveducators.com If you want to join the Discussion please email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com, or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard. Sources: Lawcenter.giffords.org nytimes.com
50:03
May 11, 2020
S2, E5: It's Not a Matter of If, But a Matter of When
Imagine living in a community where 4 out of 5 mothers, sisters, daughters, and friends will experience violence in their lifetime.  Where the people you love and know are murdered at a rate 10x higher than the national average.  Where the majority of perpetrators live outside your community, but are rarely prosecuted due to the complexity of legal system surrounding you.  And where for the longest time, and even today, these issues have been largely ignored by society. . Today, we hear from two advocates fighting to break that silence.  . Special guest: Coalition to Stop Violence Against Native Women . If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
43:50
May 4, 2020
S2, E4: My Fab Financial Advocate
Who better to break down financial abuse than a millennial money expert?  Tonya Rapley is a millennial money expert, domestic violence survivor, and creator of the award winning site, My Fab Finance.  In 2014 she was deemed the “New Face of Wealth Building” by Black Enterprise Magazine.  Tonya’s mission is to help millennials break the cycle of living paycheck to paycheck so that they can become financially free.  She shares her experience and knowledge to empower women and girls of all ages and backgrounds. Today, she shares her wisdom and insight with us.  Listen now! Then check out her site: https://myfabfinance.com/ If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
25:22
April 20, 2020
S2, E3: A Psychological Exploration of a Narcissist Killer
Come for the true crime, stay for an analysis of how narcissism and lack of empathy factor into the psychology of abusive men. Featuring psychotherapist and author of best selling book "My Daddy is a Hero"Lena Derhally, today's episode explores the mind of family killer C.W. in order to break down the warning signs and attempt to prevent future tragedies like this. If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
39:19
April 13, 2020
S2, E2: The Reproductive Justice Movement
Today we are joined by two advocates from the Washington State Coalition Against Domestic Violence to discuss the Reproductive Justice Movement. You'll be amazed where the conversation goes. If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
40:33
April 6, 2020
S2, E1: Consent is Sexy
Happy Sexual Assault Awareness Month! We are kicking off Season 2 with a deep dive into the SAAM theme for 2020, I Ask for Consent. And to celebrate SAAM 2020, the remaining episodes will feature a special guest from across the country. It's going to be fun. Welcome to season 2. If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
27:13
April 1, 2020
COVID19-1: Corona and the Dangers to Survivors
Incidences of domestic violence spike during times of crisis.  The novel Corona VIrus is no exception.  In this special season, we will look at different ways the COVID19 pandemic is challenging survivors of domestic violence.  In part 1, we speak to a virology expert on what is Corona and why we have taken the precautionary measures to contain it.  We then break down why this will negatively impact domestic violence survivors and what we can do to help.  Resources:  WSCADV Friends and Family Guide WSCADV Corona resources  National Domestic Violence Hotline Safety Planning Scientist Explain Bustle Interview Jezebel Interview If you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook, Instagram , Twitter, and Tik Tok @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
38:10
March 28, 2020
PURPLE! SEASON 1 Bloopers, bungles, and blunders
Because we need a laugh
04:35
March 23, 2020
Season 1 Final(e) Discussion
This episode is a discussion, me with two other survivors. We chat about things we wish people had said to us, our thoughts on how to speak to survivor, how we deal with the aftershocks of leaving, and anything else on our minds.  Here is what I realized through making this episode. Sharing with people, especially people you trust is an amazing way to validate your experiences, but also gain perspective.  Having the perspective that survivors aren't alone in an experience can make it seem less hopeless. It can make the monster seem less scary. Less indomitable.  And its validating. It breaks the sense of isolation. And yeah, it's cold comfort because it's still trauma, but a shared burden is a lighter load. So I hope that this conversation is helpful to you. I hope everything you hear on this podcast is helpful.  And if you want to join the Discussion please write in. Email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com or connect on Facebook and Instagram @theDVDiscussion.  We all have our stories. And they deserve to be heard.
37:52
March 16, 2020
BONUS EPISODE: History of International Women's Day
Happy International Women's Day, a day of global celebration.  Today, we celebrate women's social, economic,  cultural, and political achievements, while raising awareness about bias and equality, and taking action to strive for an equal world.  But how did this day become a holiday? And why March 8th? Buckle up, this one is a wild ride. . If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit https://www.thehotline.org/ Questions about what you've heard? Reach out on Facebook or Instagram @thedvdiscussion, or email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com
10:05
March 8, 2020
S1, E6: Stalking
Stalking is not a joke. It is not romantic. It is not ok. Today, we break down what stalking is, how dangerous it can be, and why it is not looked at as seriously as it should be. Trigger warning: this episode contains depictions of stalking, domestic violence, and other forms of abuse. Please use discretion. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit https://www.thehotline.org/ Questions about what you've heard? Reach out on Facebook or Instagram @thedvdiscussion, or email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com
16:56
March 2, 2020
S1, E5: Sexual Violence and Coercion
TRIGGER WARNING In this episode, we discuss intimate partner rape, sexual assault, and sexual and reproductive coercion. Please use discretion.  If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit https://www.thehotline.org/ Questions about what you've heard? Reach out on Facebook or Instagram @thedvdiscussion, or email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com
18:51
February 24, 2020
S1, E4: Financial Abuse
Financial abuse is extremely common, sometimes the first sign of of dating violence and domestic abuse.  It's also the main reason why victims don't leave abusive relationships. So what is it, and what's the impact? If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit https://www.thehotline.org/ Questions about what you've heard? Reach out on Facebook or Instagram @thedvdiscussion, or email us at thedvdiscussion@gmail.com
15:29
February 24, 2020
S1, E3: Emotional Abuse Part 2
Controlling someone alone is hard. Sometimes, it helps to have allies.  If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit https://www.thehotline.org/ Recommended Reading:  "Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Bancroft
10:39
February 10, 2020
S1, E3: Emotional Abuse Part 1
In part 1 of Emotional Abuse, we break down what it is, how it happens, and why it can be so difficult to spot.  If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit https://www.thehotline.org/ Recommended Reading:  "Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Bancroft 
14:03
February 3, 2020
S1, E2: Physical Abuse
When people think about domestic violence, they usually picture physical abuse.  But what "counts" as physical abuse? Some of the examples may surprise you. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit https://www.thehotline.org/
09:00
January 27, 2020
S1, E1: Welcome to the Discussion
How do you define domestic violence? On season 1 episode 1 of the DV Discussion, we talk about what domestic violence is, how commonly it occurs, and what it looks like.  Welcome to the Discussion.  If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 1-800-799-7233 or visit https://www.thehotline.org/
07:39
January 20, 2020