The Adoption Files

By Ande Stanley

The Adoption files seeks to provide a place for adoptees and allies to discuss the laws preventing adoptees from accessing their identities, and the emotional and physical challenges adoptees face in the process of dealing with the obstacles we face. We recognize the need to expose the problematic aspects of the adoption industry and the narrative they perpetuate.

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Interview with Jude Conn

The Adoption FilesNov 21, 2021

00:00

01:04:01

Waiting; an Interlude. Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer. A discussion

Please join Lynn and I as we discuss the Interlude titled Waiting. Lynn prefers the title Delusional, and its hard to argue.

This is the next episode in a series discussing the book Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer.

The focus of the book is on reproductive rights and justice. As adopted people, we hope to explore not just these topics but also how the move to erode reproductive rights and to conflate adoption with abortion are illuminated in this book. Any errors are our own.

Mentioned in the episode:

Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics (Anthropologies of American Medicine: Culture, Power, and Practice) - Kindle edition by Cromer, Risa. Religion & Spirituality Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com. What Is a Loaded Language? (with pictures) (languagehumanities.org) Three Identical Strangers (2018) - IMDb The opinions of the hosts are their own. The hosts are not lawyers or fertility specialists. Both are adopted people. Lynn is a Baby Scoop Era, Domestic, Transracial adoptee . Ande is a Baby Scoop Era, Transnational, Late Discovery Adoptee and a former Evangelical.

Thank you for listening!

Apr 12, 202447:15

A conversation with Donna Jane, a California adoptee

Please join Donna Jane and I as we talk about adoption, the laws in California, and the right to access to a persons own information.

Mentioned in the episode:

California Adoptee access to documents: California | Adoptee Rights Law Center Please visit Adoptee Rights Law Center and their affiliate, Adoptees United. Please consider supporting them in their efforts to see legislation passed that acknowledges adoptee rights and equality.

ICWA Indian Child Welfare Act (ICWA) | Indian Affairs (bia.gov) NICWA Home » NICWA

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions. The host is not a lawyer.

Thank you for listening!

Apr 11, 202457:47

Support Californias' Senate Bill 1274

Hi! Please listen to a short appeal for your help in passing California SB1274, a bill that would restore adoptee access to original birth certificates in the state. This is an equal rights issue, as adopted people are the only peoplle in the United States who are legally barred access to their own birth certificates in all but 15 states. We all deserve to know who we are, what our origins are, what our connections are. This bill addresses that one, vital document, allowing adopted people to request and receive a copy at or after the age of 18. Please look below for information on how you can help pass this important bill.

Equality | California Adoptee Rights (californiaadoptees.org) Bill Text - SB-1274 Vital records: adoptees’ birth certificates. (2) Facebook Thank you!!

Apr 05, 202403:03

Part 2 of Ch 3 Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer, as discussion

Please join us for part 2 of Ch 3! Listen as we conclude our discussion of the chapter and become completely derailed by a three pound cat.

Author Risa Cromer provides an excellent study of the history of the push for embryo personhood and how the language of adoptin is being used by nationalist white evangelical christians to subvert reproductive justice. As adopted people, Lynn and I explore what this concept of embryo adoption means to us and how scary this all is to contemplate. The book is timely, as reproductive rights continue to be eroded, and the transfer of children from family to strangers is being pushed even harder by adoption advocates.

Plus, theres a cat.

Mentioned in the episode: Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics (Anthropologies of American Medicine: Culture, Power, and Practice) - Kindle edition by Cromer, Risa. Religion & Spirituality Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com. Birthrates are declining globally – here's why it matters | World Economic Forum (weforum.org) The opinions of the hosts are just that, their opinions. The hosts are not lawyers, therapists, or fertility specialists. They are two adopted people; one white, late-discovery, international, non-binary and bisexual; the other transracial, domestic, cishet. Both old enough to (mostly) know better. Thank you for listening!

Apr 01, 202436:05

Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer, Ch 3. Or, as Lynn calls it These Gifts are never Free

Please join Lynn Grubb and I as we discuss Chapter 3 of the book Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer. While the very well done research in this book centers reproductive politics and white nationalist evangelical christianity use of personhood ideology as regards frozen embryos, Lynn and I talk about the topic primarily through the lens of adopted people ourselves.

This is part 1 of a 2 part episode, primarily because I havent learned how this recording suite functions yet.

Mentioned in the episode: Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics (Anthropologies of American Medicine: Culture, Power, and Practice) - Kindle edition by Cromer, Risa. Religion & Spirituality Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com. Home - Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org) https://www.reddit.com/r/SelfCareCharts/comments/g9j8h0/steven_hassan_developed_the_bite_model_to/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

The opinions of the hosts are just that, their opinions. The host is not a lawyer, therapist, or fertility specialist.

Please check out what I am encouraging people to consider Part 2 of the discussion of chapter 3, which will be published shortly after this episode goes up. We are a work in progress! Thank you for you patience. Thanks for listening!

Apr 01, 202453:05

Embryo Saviorism : Ch 2 Conceiving Christian America

Please join Lynn and I as we talk about chapter 2 of Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer, along with a brief discussion of whats happening in Texas.

Mentioned in the episode

Conceiving Christian America (nyupress.org)The Child Catchers: Rescue, Trafficking, and the New Gospel of Adoption: Joyce, Kathryn: 9781586489427: Amazon.com: Books Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood: Sisson, Gretchen: 9781250286772: Amazon.com: Books Review: THE VIOLENCE OF FAMILY FORMATION: ENSLAVED FAMILIES AND REPRODUCTIVE LABOR IN THE MARKETPLACE on JSTOR 'Orphan Trains' Brought Homeless NYC Children to Work On Farms Out West | HISTORY Historian: American Indian Boarding Schools and Their Impact | TIME Indian Child Welfare Act (ICWA) | Indian Affairs (bia.gov)Throwback Tulsa: Supreme Court reverses 'Baby Veronica' decision 10 years ago today (tulsaworld.com)Indian Child Welfare Act (ICWA) (Haaland v. Brackeen) - Native American Rights Fund (narf.org)This Land | Crooked Media

https://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/parenting/inside-texas-manipulative-adoption-marketing-campaign-that-targets-young-women-and-teen-girls/ar-BB1kicOr?ocid=socialshare

The hosts approach the book and any supplemental materials from the perspective of adopted people, as a female identifying person and a non-binary person, as a straight person and as a bisexual person, as a transracial domestic adoptee, and as a same race white adoptee. Any errors in presenting the authors material is that of the hosts. The hosts opinions are their own.

Thank you for listening! We hope you will join us for the next episode in the series. Also, stay tuned for a follow up interview on the situation with efforts to pass a clean bill in Virginia, and a series of interviews with California adoptees seeking to educate Californians on the need for equal rights to original birth documents in their state.

Mar 27, 202401:11:46

Claiming Adoption: Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics

Please join Lynn and I as we discuss the interlude Claiming Adoption from Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoptino and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer. We begin todays episode with a discussion of Nightlight Adoptions article on five unique aspects of snowflake adoption.

Mentioned in the show:

Conceiving Christian America (Anthropologies of American Medicine: Culture, Power, and Practice) by Cromer, Risa: Fine (2023) | GF Books, Inc. (abebooks.com) unique benefits (nightlight.org) Topic no. 607, Adoption credit and adoption assistance programs | Internal Revenue Service (irs.gov) While we recognize that the author of the book is speaking from a reproductive justice perspective, the hosts speak primarily from the perspective of adoptee rights. We acknowledge that our thoughts and opinions may diverge from the focus of the book at various points. We agree that reprodcutive rights are under attack and support the goal of the author to educate the public on the dangers. We also wish to educate the public on the harms that embryo gestation by genetic strangers causes to any person that may result. We object to the fertility and adoption industrys attempts to co-opt adoption and adoptees to further their political and financial and religious ambitions.

The opiniions of the hosts are just that, their opinions. The hosts are not lawyers or fertility specialists.

Thank you for listening! We welcome respectful feedback.

Mar 21, 202443:39

Chapter 1 Life After IVF, Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adotion and Reproductive Politics

Please join Lynn Grubb and I as we discuss Chapter 1 of Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer, and the intersection with the impact on adoptees. While embryo adoption is not legally adoption, but rather a property transfer, the fertility industry deliberately uses the language of adoption to obscure this fact.

Lynn can be found online as The Adopted Genealogist, and is the President of the Adoptee Rights Coalition. Home | ARC (adopteerightscoalition.com) Ande Stanley is a Late-Discovery, transnational, same race adopted person.

Mentioned in the show:

Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics (Anthropologies of American Medicine: Culture, Power, and Practice) - Kindle edition by Cromer, Risa. Religion & Spirituality Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com. Parents welcome twins from embryos frozen 30 years ago | CNN The Family Preservation Project The Family Preservation Project – Where Moms and Resources Meet https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/interview-with-katie-nelson-burns-of-the/id1598023322?i=1000647934005

There are many articles out there on the lack of regulation and oversight for the ART industry. Here is just one that popped up in a Google search:

Navigating the Ethical and Legal Maze of IVF: A Closer Look at Industry Challenges – Health Law & Policy Brief (healthlawpolicy.org) The opinions of the host and the co-host are just that, our opinions. The host is not a lawyer,or a fertility specialist.

Mar 18, 202401:06:19

What we call things matters: Conceiving Christian America; Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics Episode 3

Please join us as we discuss Interlude "Coming to Terms" of the book Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer. In this episode, we talk about the debate over semantics that occurred at the beginning of the embryo "adoption" movement, and how it continues to shape peoples perspectives today. Mentioned in the show: Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics (Anthropologies of American Medicine: Culture, Power, and Practice) - Kindle edition by Cromer, Risa. Religion & Spirituality Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com. PCUSA: https://www.pcusa.org/news/2022/5/17/reproductive-justice-and-pcusa/ National Embryo Donation Center: National Embryo Donation Center Concerned United Birthparents: Bethany Christian Services: Concerned United Birthparents Saving our Sisters: Home - Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org) Bethany Christian Services | Bethany Discourse or semantic prosody: Semantic prosody - Wikipedia Ethnography: Ethnography | Definition, Types, Examples, & Facts | Britannica Semantics: Semantics Definition & Meaning - Merriam-Webster Kathryn Joyce, The Child Catchers: The Child Catchers: Rescue, Trafficking, and the New Gospel of Adoption: Joyce, Kathryn: 9781586489427: Amazon.com: Books Polite Adoption Language (PAL) Language developed by the adoption industry to make severing a child from family more palatable. Adopted people who object to the use of PAL are often reprimanded by people with a vested interest in the continuance of the system. Thank you for listening to the podcast! Any errors in relating the contents of the book are the hosts own. The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions. The host is not a lawyer, a therpaist or a fertility specialist.

Mar 10, 202401:03:23

Exploring the Intro to Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer.

Please join Lynn and I as we discuss the Introduction to Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer. If you haven't picked up a copy of the book yet, you can order it from Amazon or your local bookseller.

We try very hard to behave like adults while talking about this very emotional issue. The implications of frozen embryo adoption are profoud for many intersecting communities, as can be seen in the recent law in Alabama, declaring that embryos are persons. We attempt to remain true to Ms. Romers work while also interpreting it through the lens of adopted persons, persons with female bodies, and persons with female children or grandchildren. So buckle up! it may be a bumpy ride.

Mentioned in the show:

Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer Conceiving Christian America (Anthropologies of American Medicine: Culture, Power, and Practice): Cromer, Risa: 9781479818594: Amazon.com: Books ART: Assisted Reproductive Technologies What is Assisted Reproductive Technology? | Reproductive Health | CDC Alabama Supreme Court Decision on Personhood of Embryos Alabama embryo ruling: state Supreme Court rules frozen embryos are children. Impacts could be devastating, critics warn | CNN

Saviourism:Ms. Cromer discusses saviourism in embryo adoption quite extensively. Here this refers to White Christian Nationalist Evangelicals belief that they are divinely mandated to save "frozen orphans" . White Saviourism is an established worldview that postions white people as uniquely situated to save people in marginalized communities. Its a problem.

Nightlight Adoption Agency: the agency that pivoted to promoting frozen embryos as a part of their prolife ideology and their need for income.

The conservative math of one agency: 20,000 x 15,000 = 300,000,000

Baby Scoop Era: Baby Scoop Era - Wikipedia Storage Wars: Watch Storage Wars Full Episodes, Video & More | A&E (aetv.com)

Suspension of Disbelief: Suspension of disbelief - Wikipedia

Thank you for listening! Please consider giving the podcast a rating so we can get the word out.

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, their opinions. The host is not a lawyer, therapist, or fertility specialist. They are, however, a late-discovery, transnational adopted person with an attitude.

Mar 06, 202439:45

Interview with Katie Nelson Burns of The Family Preservation Project

Please join me as I speak with Katie Nelson Burns, founder of The Family Preservation Project. Katie is a mother of loss to adoption who is passionately committed to preventing others from applying permanent solutions to temporary problems. As the creator of the project and as a board member of Saving our Sisters, Katie devotes a great deal to helping pregnant mothers in crisis.

Mentioned on the show:

The Family Preservation Project: The Family Preservation Project – Where Moms and Resources Meet Saving our Sisters: Home - Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org) All You Have is Love: Home - (allyouhaveislove.com) Georgis Alliance for Adoptee Rights: Home | Georgia Alliance for Adoptee Rights (gaallianceforadopteerights.org) Georgia Revocation Law: Georgia Code § 19-8-26 (2019) - Forms :: 2019 Georgia Code :: US Codes and Statutes :: US Law :: Justia Adoptee Access to records, Georgia: Georgia | Adoptee Rights Law Center TANF: Welfare benefits or Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) | USAGov PTSD: Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) - Symptoms and causes - Mayo Clinic Stress Response: Protect your brain from stress - Harvard Health Support for parents of loss to adoption:

Concerned United Birthparents [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum

If you are experiencing suicidal ideation, please reach out for support. NAMI-National-HelpLine-WarmLine-Directory-3-11-20.pdf Thank ou for listening to the show!

The opinions of the host and their guests are just that, their opinions. The host is not a lawyer or a therapist.

Mar 04, 202401:20:29

Interview with Jennifer Trudeau of Parents Partnership

Please join me and my guest, Jennifer Trudeau as we talk about her new organization, Parents Partnership. We discuss the need for a networking system for parents and grandparents as they navigate the challenges of caring for children in an increasingly isolating, expensive world.
Mentioned in the show:
Parents Partnership:
Parents Partnership | Sign Up Today!

(5) Facebook

www.linkedin.com/company/parents-partnership-inc/

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, our opinions. The host is not a lawyer or an therapist. Thank you for listening! Please rate the show so that we can get the word out on adoptee rights, family preservation and the laws and systems underpinning the family severance narrative.

Feb 28, 202401:00:53

A Note on the new series Conceiving Christian America; Snowflake Adoption

The host and co-host wish to clarify some of the language when referring to evangelical Christianity as they begin to explore the book Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics by Risa Cromer

Feb 26, 202404:19

Conceiving Christian America: introducing a new series on Snowflake Adoption, with Ande Stanley and Lynn Grubb

Please join me and my co-host as we explore the book Conceiving Christian America: Embryo Adoption and Reproductive Politics, by Risa Cromer. Snowflake adoptions have been on my radar for years now. We are delighted to begin a conversation on the implications of frozen embryo adoptions from the perspective of adult adopted people, with the added wieght this book provides to the discussion. In light of recent decisions such as the Alabama Supreme Court ruling designating a frozen embryo as a person, its a discussion long past due.
Mentioned in the podcast:

Conceiving Christian America (nyupress.org)

Risa Cromer - College of Liberal Arts - Purdue University

Snowflake adoption:
Snowflake children - Wikipedia

Assisted Reproductive Technology(ART)
What is Assisted Reproductive Technology? | Reproductive Health | CDC

Video of President Bush thanking Nightlight Christian Adoption Agency for beginning the frozen embryo adoption system: youtu.be/JA4-4ZKpLgU?si=irDJAbVcrCDV5jkp

Thank you for listening! Please rate the podcast so we can get the word out about adoptee rights, family preservation and the need to change the pervasive family severance narrative.
The opinions of the host and their guests are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer, therapist, or fertility specialist.

Feb 26, 202428:23

Interview with Valerie from Washington Adoption Reunion Movement

Please join Valerie and me as we talk about WARM, the Washington Adoption Reunion Movement. Warm was established in the 1970s to help adopted people reunite with family.
Mentioned in the show:
WARM:
Front Page - WARM (warmsearch.org)

warm@warmsearch.org
206-767-9510; applications available via email

CUB: Concerned United Birthparents:
Concerned United Birthparents

Washington Digital Archives:
Washington State Archives, Digital Archives

Post | NCAP (ncap-us.org)

Genealogy Search - Trace Your Ancestry Online (genealogybank.com)

Historical Newspapers from 1700s-2000s - Newspapers.com

Ancestry.com
23andme.com

DNA and Genealogy Tools to Grow Your Family Tree | GEDmatch

Search Angel; a search angel is a person who will help you understand your DNA and genealogy connections for FREE. Please seek referrals and assistance with reputable people, as you are giving them personal information. DNA Detectives on Facebook is a good place to seek information and referrals. They are also a good place to find support.

Where Adoptee Voices Meet – An Adoptee Centric Connect Group (adopteesconnect.com)

There are many online support groups available also. One to consider is Adoption Trauma Network and its private group on Facebook. I am including a few other groups, but the best way to find a group is to enter your specific interest along with the words adoptee support in the search bar on facebook. There are also adoptees in IG, Tiktok and X, as well as Substack and other platforms.

IKAA – Ikaa

Home - Adoptees with Guatemalan Roots (guateroots.org)

Intercountry Adoptee Voices on Facebook

Thank you for listening to the podcast! Please leave a rating so others can find the show.
The opinions of the host and their guests are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer or a therapist.

Feb 23, 202401:27:56

Interview with Beth Steury

Please join me as I speak with Beth Steury about adoption in Indiana, and the advocacy being done by NAAP, the National Association of Adoptees and Parents.
Beth is an Indiana adoptee who can be found at BethSteury.com. She is the treasurer of NAAP, a Search Angel, and a writer.
Mentioned in the episode:

Beth Steury, Author – Life Matter Publishing – Because Life Matters

Health: Vital Records: Adoptions (in.gov)

Indiana | Adoptee Rights Law Center

Home | ARC (adopteerightscoalition.com)

Home (naapunited.org)

Homepage - Untangling Our Roots
Severance Magazine
Adoption Mosaic
Concerned United Birthparents(CUB)
The opinions of the host and the guest are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer or a therapist.

Feb 11, 202401:19:40

Virginia's House Bill 550, with guest Rebecca Ricardo

Please join me as I speak with adoptee and birthmom Rebecca Ricardo, LCSW about Virginias bill that will restore unrestricted access to Virginia adoptees to their unamended birth certificates. As an adoption professional, Rebecca is very well-versed in the way adoption is carried out in the state of Virginia.

Mentioned in the episode:

Virginia House Bill 550: VA HB550 | 2024 | Regular Session | LegiScan Adoptees United: Adoptees United | Identity, Citizenship, Equality Adoptee Rights Law: Adoptee Rights Law Center PLLC Capitol Coalition for Adoptee Rights: Capitol Coalition for Adoptee Rights | DC, Maryland, and Virginia (capitoladoptees.org) Virginia Adoptee Rights Alliance: Virginia Action Alert | Virginia Adoptee Rights Alliance Georgia Alliance for Adoptee Rights: Home | Georgia Alliance for Adoptee Rights (gaallianceforadopteerights.org) Bastard Nation: Bastard Nation | The Adoptee Rights Organization (bastards.org) Please visit the various websites for more information on Virginias HB 550, as well as information about other legislation currently in the works.

My apologies for the lack of editing on the episode. I discovered i need to learn a whole new editing program, as the platform I have been learning is no longer available.

The opinions expressed by the host and their guest are just that, our opinions. The host is not a lawyer.

Thanks for listening!

Feb 04, 202401:06:45

Forever is not a guarantee

Basically, this is me, ranting about how ludicrous the idea of forever homes and forever family is in a system that devalues the child and places all the value in the narrative clung to by prospective and adoptive parents. The sound quality is not great, but I am putting this out there, anyway. My opinions are my own. The laws are on the books that allow unsupervised exchange of children on shady websites like Second Chance Adoption and rehomimg sites on places like Facebook and LinkedIn. The language of forever is easily found on adoption agency websites and in pro adoption literature. Academic papers and books on the trauma of abandonment, rejection and displacement can be found in university libraries, public libraries and online. My opinions are my own, but the information is out there and accessible. Thanks for listening!

Feb 03, 202416:11

Interview with Gaye Sherman Tannenbaum

Please join me as I speak with Gaye Sherman Tannenbaum, a New York adoptee and treasurer of the Adoptee Rights Coalition. Gaye is a CPA who worked in forensic accounting. She now applies the skills she acquired as a forensic investigator to helping people with their genealogy.

Mentioned in the show:

New York adoption law: Obtaining Original (Pre-Adoption) Birth Certificate for Adoptees - New York State Department of Health (ny.gov)

Illinois Adoption law: Birth Certificates Available to Adoptees (illinois.gov)

Kansas adoption law: Obtaining a Before Adoption Birth Certificate | KDHE, KS

California adoption law: Obtain Birth Certificate

The opinions expressed by the host and thier guest are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer or a therapist.

Dec 11, 202301:33:57

Interview on Adoptee Rights 101, with Lynn Grubb, president of Adoptee Rights Coalition

Please join us for a discussion on Adoptee Rights 101, the dual birth certificate system and the need for unrestricted access laws. Lynn Grubb is the president of Adoptee Rights Coalition, an Ohio 501 C4 non profit educational project seeking to inform legislators and the public on adoptee rights issues.

Mentioned in the show:

Home | ARC (adopteerightscoalition.com) Concerned United Birthparents Georgia Alliance for Adoptee Rights – Dedicated to Equality for All Adoptees (gaallianceforadopteerights.org) California Adoptee Rights | Adoptees United Inc. California Alliance for Adoptee Rights on FB

Michigan Adoptee Rights Coalition | Home (michiganadoptees.org) Home (naapunited.org) Dual Birth Certificate system: there is no one rule that governs adoption in the United States. The dual birth certificate system refers to the practice of issuing a true birth certificate to an individual at birth, and then, if the person is adopted, issuing a subsequent amended legal certificate that reports the adoptive parents as if the adopted person were born to them. Other details may be changed or omitted as well. The original is sealed and, in 36 states, kept a secret from the adopted person.

Transracial adoptees struggle to talk to their White parents about race - Washington Post Disclaimer: the host is not a lawyer or a therapist. The opinions of the host and thier guests are just that, opinions. The listener is encouraged to learn more about the topics discussed, just as the host continues to strive to do. Thanks for listening!

Nov 06, 202301:13:14

The Burning Question: Will the Government finally decide I am a real person?

The RealId saga continues. An update on where things stand, or, Ande decides to vent. mentioned in the episode: RealId: a new-ish form of supposedly verified identification that will be required to fly. Passports/US Immigration: the first is a form of identification issued by the latter that verifies a persons citizenship in the relevant country and endows certain protections to the holder. Necessary for travel across international borders. Homeland Security: the governmental entity tasked with maintaining national security. Created as a response to failures in national security measures pre-9/11. Disclaimer: the host is not a lawyer or government employee. The hosts opinions are the result of massive annoyance with a system that has theoretically been designed for the adoptee and the citizens benefit, but that often seems to function in direct opposition to its stated goals, and then walks away full of self-satisfaction; leaving the affected parties trailing behind, weeping and shaking their fists at the sky.

Oct 31, 202321:35

Interview with Dani Joy

Dani Joy is a mother of loss to adoption. Her son was born and adopted in the state of North Carolina, a closed state. Dani entered into an open adoption with members of her church. Please join us as we talk about her experience with adoption and it's life altering impact.
Mentioned in the show:
North Carolina relinquishment law:
Termination of Parental Rights (nccourts.gov)
North Carolina Adoptee access laws:
Birth Family Search Information | NCDHHS

Bethany Christian adoption agency: Bethany Christian is a pro-adoption agency that has worked in domestic and international adoption for decades.
Saving our Sisters: Saving our Sisters is an organization dedicated to family preservation.They provide resources and assistance to pregnant people in crisis and to relinquishing parents seeking to regain custody of children they have given up for adoption.
Home - Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org)
Support Groups:
Home - Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org)

Concerned United Birthparents

Adoption:Facing Reality

National Association of Adoptees and Parents:
Home (naapunited.org)

Adoption Trauma Network (on Facebook)
Adoptees Connect:
Where Adoptee Voices Meet – An Adoptee Centric Connect Group (adopteesconnect.com)

Mental Health Resources: a couple of things about mental health hotlines and resources. Very few resources are adoptee or first family centric. In addition, some are connected to policing, meaning that, if provided with enough identifying information, the mandated reporter may feel a duty to dispatch law enforcement if they feel your life is in danger. They can be a great resource; they should just be used with informed consent.

14 Free Mental Health Resources - Parade

Disclaimer: the host is not a lawyer or a therapist. The opinions of the host and thier guests are just that, their opinions. We encourage listeners to do their own follow-up research. Please educate yourselves on adoption and teh adoption industry. There are many great resources that you can use to learn about the lived experiences of adoptees and family.

Oct 18, 202301:19:38

Interview with Lina Vanegas, MSW

Lina Vanegas MSW(Masters in Social Work) identifies as a transracial, transnational, displaced person. Her lived experience has motivated her to train, speak and consult on trauma, mental health, adoption and suicide. She shares some of her experience and expertise with us as we talk about how adoption impacts adoptee mental health.
on Instagram: linaleadswithlove. On Twitter LinaLeadsWLove
She can also be contacted at Linavanegasmsw@gmail.com
Links to Lina's work:
(1) Lina Vanegas - This is an important read. Forced treatment is... | FacebookOrganizing and Activism of Adopted and Displaced People - Bill of Health (harvard.edu)Demystifying the stigmatization of adoptee suicide | InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)Coping with Loss from Adoption Suicide | InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)We Need To Talk About Adoptee Suicide, Now | InterCountry Adoptee Voices (ICAV)
Mentioned in the show:
Sealed adoption records: the modern practice of adoption includes substituting the adoptive parents names for the adopted persons parents names on an amended(falsified) certificate. Original certificates and adoption records are then sealed away and are unaccessible to the adoptee, with the exception of 14 states. In some cases, transnational adopted people have access at an age determined by their country of origin. This practice denies the adoptees right to their own information.
Adoptees for Justice: Citizenship is an issue for many transnational adopted persons. Adoptees for Justice is an adoptee led organization working to right this injustice.
Adoptees for Justice
Rehoming: Rehoming is a horrendous, non-regulated practice wherein adoptive parents who feel they have a "failed adoption" seek to pass the adopted child on to their next "forever home". There are groups online that facilitate these practices, usually without any oversight.
Right to annul adoption: adopted people do not currently have the right to annul or abdicate their adoption, even as adults. There are efforts being made in places like the UK to allow annulment.
Greg Luce/Adoptee Rights Law: Greg Luce is a Minnesota adoptee who advocates for adoptee rights through his law practice. His website provides a great deal of useful information about the laws governing adoption in the United States. He is also active in advocating for citizenship.
Adoptee Rights Law Center PLLC
Your Consent is not Required, by Rob Wipond:
Your Consent is Not Required - Rob Wipond
Looking for more information? We suggest checking out adopteereading.com, #adopteevoices on Twitter(x), adoptees of TikTok and on Instagram and LinkedIn. There are also many great blogs, podcasts, facebook pages and articles. You can reach out to Lina on IG and Twitter, or by email. You can reach out to me on Facebook or at ande.stanleyyahoo.com

Article and hotline numbers for Black mental health:
Ask a Black therapist: 4 ways to support Black people's mental health | CNN

Suicide Prevention lines: These lines are provided with the caveat that some of these numbers are answered by people who are mandated reporters. This means that the information you give may result in a check the welfare call to law enforcement. Most locales have laws that provide for involuntary commitment when a person is considered at imminent risk. Some of these lines are considered Warm lines, which are generally not connected to law enforcement(as far as I am aware)
List of Hotlines for Mental Health Help (psycom.net)
Hotline - Trans Lifeline
Disclaimer: The podcast host is not a lawyer or a therapist. The opinions expressed by the host and thier guests are our opinions.
Thank you for listening to the show! Please leave a rating, they help make the podcast more visible.

Sep 27, 202301:32:51

Interview with VellaMae Travis

VellaaMae Travis is an adoptee from the closed state of Kentucky. Please join us as we talk about being born and adopted in a sealed state, and the difficutlies of pursuing records in Kentucky. We also discuss adovocacy, being married to another adopted person, and the challenges of raising a child as an adoptee.

Mentioned in the show:

Kentucky adoption law: Kentucky | Adoptee Rights Law Center

California AB 1302: California Adoptee Rights | Adoptees United Inc. Reunion registries: the idea of a reunion registry is that the adopted person and family members can sign up and the registry will facilitate connection. With the advent of DNA tests, registries are no longer relevant.

Sep 09, 202301:11:43

Interview with Lisa Elaine Scott

Lisa Elaine Scott is a writer and filmmaker. She is a Baby Scoop Era California adoptee and the director of the upcoming film "All You Have is Love: Demand, Deception and the Infant Adoption Industry. Lisa can be found at: lscott327@yahoo.com All You Have is Love: Demand, Deception and the Infant Adoption Industry Home - (allyouhaveislove.com) All You Have Is Love - YouTube Please use the site below to participate in making this groundbreaking work possible! All You Have Is Love: Demand, Deception, and the Infant Adoption Industry - Film and Storytelling | Seed&Spark (seedandspark.com)

www.seedandspark.com/fund/allyouhaveislove Mentioned in the show: California adoptee access law: Adoption Records (ca.gov) AB 1302: California Adoptee Rights | Adoptees United Inc. CUB (Concerned United Birthparents: Concerned United Birthparents SOS( Saving Our Sisters) Home - Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org) Familiy Preservation Project: The Family Preservation Project – Where Moms and Resources Meet The opinion expressed on the podcast are those of the host and their guest(s). The host is not a lawyer, therapist, life coach or coffee drinker. Much love. Remember, go to Home - (allyouhaveislove.com) make a donation, sign up for the newsletter, reach out to Lisa if you'd like to participate.

www.seedandspark.com/fund/allyouhaveislove

Jun 05, 202301:07:48

Interview with co-host Lynn Grubb and guest Lorraine Dusky

Please join us as we talk with Lorraine Dusky, author of Hole in My Heart: Love and Loss in the Fault Lines of Adoption, as well as the book Birthmark and many other books and articles. Lorraine was the first mother to come forward and publicly talk about her experience with loss to adoption during the height of the baby scoop era. Lorraine has been a vocal advocate of adoptee rights and unrestricted access to birth certificates for over fifty years. Her books can be found at bookstores and can also be ordered online at sites like Amazon

Amazon.com: Hole in My Heart: Love and Loss in the Fault Lines of Adoption eBook : Dusky, Lorraine: Kindle Store

Lynn Grubb can be found online at The Adoption Experience | a podcast by Lynn Grubb (podbean.com)

Mentioned in the episode:

Saving Our Sisters Home - Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org)

Roe v Wade: Roe v. Wade: Decision, Summary & Background | HISTORY

Dobbs Decision: Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health Organization (2022) | Wex Legal Dictionary / Encyclopedia | LII / Legal Information Institute (cornell.edu)

Alitos draft opinion: Read Justice Alito's initial draft abortion opinion which would overturn Roe v. Wade - POLITICO

Safe Haven Baby Boxes: legal abandonment boxes leased in some states from the Safe Haven Baby Box company, whic h profits from infants being anonymously deposited. For more information, visit Stop Safe Haven Baby Boxes Stop Safe Haven Baby Boxes | Stop Baby Boxes Now! (stopshbbnow.org)

Florence Fisher/ ALMA, Bastard Nation: BB: The Adoption Reform Movement | Bastard Nation (bastards.org)

Turnaway Study: turnaway_study_brief_web.pdf (ansirh.org)

Reunion with a Grave: the experience that many adoptees have, learning the identities of family members only after those relatives have died.

Birth Index: Every county in the United States has some mechanism for collecting and maintaining birth records, as do most countries. They may have different names, but serve the same purpose. Some birth indices are public information, others are not.

The FOG (Fear, Obligation and Guilt) This term is not exclusive to adopted people. This is a good article by Derek Grimm that talks about his experience. I would expand the definition to include not just seperation from mother, but from our entire extended family. Adoption Fog | Search Find Become

AB 1302: AB 1302 is a Mommy May I bill being touted as progress for adoptees, when the bill is actually discriminatory and with create additional layers of trauma for adoptees in a state that is already incredibly callous about adoptee rights. Here is a good article discussing the bill by Greg Luce of AdopteesUnited.org Please let California legislators know that you oppose AB 1302, and ask that the sponsor amend to make this a clean bill. California Adoptee Rights | Adoptees United Inc.

Disclaimer: the hosts and our guest are not lawyers, or therapists or religious gurus. All opinions expressed are just that-opinions.

If you are experiencing suicidal ideation, please reach out to someone for help. You are important. You matter. Below are some resources for people dealing with trauma, including sexual abuse.

RAINN | The nation's largest anti-sexual violence organization

Help Prevent Suicide | SAMHSA

Mental health support: get help - Canada.ca

Mental health services - NHS (www.nhs.uk)

Crisis support - Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (aihw.gov.au)

Mental health and wellbeing – where to get help | Ministry of Health NZ

Thank you for joining us as we spoke with Lorraine Dusky. Please read her book and share! Lorraine wrote the book in the hope that the information contained be accessible and useful not just to the public but also to educators, mental health professionals and legislators.

Hole in My Heart: Love and Loss in the Fault Lines of Adoption

Lorraine Dusky, Author | Website | Books | Interview | Quotes - AllAuthor

May 07, 202301:43:50

The Cult-Like Aspects of Adoption Episode 6 with co-host Lynn Grubb and guest Rebecca Dragon

Please join us as we talk with Becca Dragon about her blog article The Cult of Adoption and the cultural adherence to the adoption narrative. Becca is an adoptee rights advocate, a writer and the creator of a series of Tiktok videos. She can be found at:

@GuaranteedHappy AdopteeTM

@mythsmisgivings on FB and IG

www.mythsmisgivingsmadness.wordpress.com

Lynn is The Adopted Genealogist on FB and IG

Mentioned in the show:

https://youtu.be/POVRCjgv0Io Adopted People Have Two Birth Certificates

https://www/tiktok.com/t/ZTRvKVEXd/ Space Dragons on Tiktok

The Dunning-Kruger Effect: An Overestimation of Capability (verywellmind.com) Why Many People Stubbornly Refuse to Change Their Minds | Psychology Today Logical Fallacies: 15 Examples of Common Fallacies | Indeed.com

Mar 30, 202301:12:02

AB 1302, a California bill that would further diminish California adoptee rights

A new bill from Republican representative Lackey would make adoptee access to original birth certificates in California even more difficult- something that seems almost impossible to imagine. Please contact state legislators and the governor to voice your opposition. Below are links to find the legislators and the governor, as well as links to Adoptees United and Bastard Nation. These last two track adoptee rights related legislation on the state and federal levels. leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/billTextClient.xhtml?bill_id=202320240AB1302. findyourrep.legislature.ca.gov/. www.gov.ca.gov/. adopteesunited.org/. bastards.org/

Mar 19, 202303:33

Insufficient and deficient; a comment on adoption cruelty

Part of the BITE model of cult like behaviors is the teaching that the family is deficient. I realize in the recording I use the word insufficient. I considered deleting the original version, re-recording and moving on from this embarrassing word substitution. Then I thought about the definitions of each word. Insufficient means not enough, inadequate. Deficient means not having enough of a specified quality or ingredient. Both have at their root the word facets; to do or to make. Both seem relevant to the treatment of our families of origin and to our treatment as adoptees. In this bonus episode, I will talk briefly about my younger adopted brother and his mom.

Mar 13, 202305:20

The Cult-Like Aspects of Adoption Episode 5 Andrea Coates

Please join us as we speak with non-adoptee and Licensed Clinical Social Worker Andrea Coates, who is also a DNA search angel and adoptee advocate. Andrea is a therapist with Greenhouse Counseling.

Adoption Therapy | Counseling at The Green House | Indianapolis Indiana Kentucky Texas Massachusetts Wisconsin (greenhouseindy.com)

Lynn Grubb can be found on social media as The Adopted Genealogist.

The Adoption Experience | a podcast by Lynn Grubb (podbean.com)

Mentioned in the podcast:

Cult Expert Steven Hassan's Freedom of Mind Resource Center

The Baby Scoop Era: Unwed Mothers, Infant Adoption and Forced Surrender: Wilson-Buterbaugh, Karen: 9780692345795: Amazon.com: Books

http://babyscoopera.com

The National Association of Social Workers (NASW) Code of Ethics (uaf.edu)

"I do not think that....the great majority of social workers (especially young, unmarried women) are competent to handle the problem of the unmarried mother and her child. A Masters Degree in Social Work does not always qualify a young woman to deal with the intricate problems of social behavior....an unwed mother must not be rushed into a decisions to give up her baby for adoption until every other avenue has been explored and every other door opened." ( in Solinger 1997) Dr Robert Barrett, the son of Crittenton home co-founder Dr Kate Waller Barrett, who became president of the Florence Crittenton homes after her death in 1925

National Mental Health Hotline | 866-903-3787

The thoughts and opinions expressed in the podcast are just that, thoughts and opinions. The host and their guests are not lawyers, therapists or religious gurus.

Thank you for listening! Please take a moment to rate the show. We are always open to constructive criticism and feedback about the show. The host of The Adoption Files can be reached at ande.stanley@yahoo.com.

Mar 13, 202301:18:53

Lynn and Ande interview Emma Stevens for episode 4 of The Cult-Like Aspects of Adoption, a therapy episode

Emma Stevens is a U.S. domestic adoptee from birth and has survived layers of trauma that have put her on multiple journeys. She developed the inner strength and courage to surmount the many struggles she faced. Her traumas were born from first being relinquished and then becoming an adoptee who struggled with being forced to wear an impossible mask playing the part of the "good adopted child." Emma is the author of two memoirs. Her work can be found at:
Amazon.com: The Gathering Place: An Adoptee's Story eBook : Stevens, Emma: Kindle Store
Amazon.com: A Fire is Coming: 9798375288994: Stevens, Emma: Books
Lynn Grubb can be found out:
The Adoption Experience | a podcast by Lynn Grubb (podbean.com)
Resources:
Macy-O-Healing-Your-Trauma-CUB-22.pdf
Dr. Janja Lalich, PhD — #igotout
NBCC | National Board for Certified Counselors
Where Adoptee Voices Meet – An Adoptee Centric Connect Group (adopteesconnect)
A Little Bit Culty on Apple Podcasts
The Adoption Experience | a podcast by Lynn Grubb (podbean.com)
Steven Hassan's BITE Model of Authoritarian Control - Freedom of Mind Resource Center
Home (naapunited.org)
Home - Beyond Words Psychological Services (growbeyondwords.com)
RAINN | The nation's largest anti-sexual violence organization While not discussed in the episode, Emma talks in her book about inappropriate and criminal sexual touch committed by her former therapist. If you or someone you know has or is experiencing unwanted or unethical sexual attention from anyone, including a therapist, psychiatrist, or social worker, please reach out for help.
Disclaimer: The host and their guests are not lawyers, therapists or religious gurus. The thoughts and opinions expressed are just that; thoughts and opinions. The host(s) always encourage listeners to learn more about the topics discussed on the podcast, and to think outside of the confines of the adoption narrative.
Thank you for listening!

Mar 03, 202301:04:33

Realid

The ongoing saga of one adoptee with a foreign birth certificate, issued more than a year after their birth, attempting to obtain a Realid. Tune in for more of this ridiculous tale!

Mar 02, 202308:29

The cult-like Aspects of Adoption Episode 2 pt 2 with guest Greg Gentry

Part 2 of Lynn and Ande's conversation with Greg Gentry. Mentioned in the show: Roe v. Wade: Decision, Summary & Background - HISTORY Read Justice Alito's initial draft abortion opinion which would overturn Roe v. Wade - POLITICO Judaism and abortion: like any other topic, abortion is one argued about in Judaism. Some hold that it is prohibited, but not until a certain stage of pregnancy. In some cases abortion is allowed only to preserve the life of the mother. The guiding rule is that abortion must be considered on a case by case basis, and not banned outright. You can spend all day reading articles on Judaism and abortion. Here is one short article that hints at the complexities: Judaism and Abortion - The Jewish View of Abortion - Chabad.org ACE: Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) (cdc.gov) Genealogy! We did not mention the importance of genealogy in the Bible. We do talk about the erasure of identity and history that is part and parcel of adoption. As contrast, the Scriptures are huge on the importance of family lines. Just take a look at Leviticus! or at how the gospels of Mathew and Luke begin by using the genealogy of Christ to justify his position in Jewish lore. But hey, where we come from is not relevant! The host is not a lawyer or a therapist. The thoughts and opinions of the host and their guests are just that, thoughts and opinions

Feb 28, 202301:06:51

The Cult-Like Aspects of Adoption with Lynn Grubb and guest Greg Gentry Pt 1

Please join the hosts as they have a conversation with Greg Gentry about the beliefs and attitudes that inform the adoption narrative, and the almost cult-like belief that people have in that narrative. In this episode and in part 2, we discuss with Greg the (absence of) scriptural support for adoption.

Greg Gentry is a domestic adoptee. He has a Masters in Theological Studies

Lynn Grubb works in the legal field and as a volunteer with CASA. She is known as The Adopted Genealogist on FB and IG and her podcast can be found at:

The Adoption Experience | a podcast by Lynn Grubb (podbean.com)

Mentioned in the show:

ACE (Adverse Childhood Experience) Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) (cdc.gov)

Steven Hassan's BITE Model of Authoritarian Control - Freedom of Mind Resource Center

What is Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD)? | CPTSDfoundation.org

Kathryn Joyce | The Child Catchers: Rescue, Trafficking, and the New Gospel of Adoption

Gregs suggested reading:

Paul Boyer, When Time Shall be no More

Bart Ehrman, Jesus, Apocalyptic Prophet of the New Millenium

Albert Schwertzer, The Quest of the Historical Jesus

The host is not a lawyer or a therapist. The thoughts and opinions of the host and their guests are just that, thoughts and opinions.

Feb 19, 202352:01

Intro to The Cultlike Aspects of Adoption with Lynn Grubb and Ande Stanley

Join us as we discuss with our guests the attitudes and beliefs that influence the adoption narrative and the almost cultlike belief that people have in that narrative, no matter what adoptees may be saying about the flaws in adoption. Beliefs influence law, and until we can change the beliefs that underpin the practice of adoption, changing laws will be difficult.

Some resources mentioned in the show:

Podcasts: A Little Bit Culty, Mark Vicente

Steven Hassan's BITE Model of Authoritarian Control - Freedom of Mind Resource Center

Kathryn Joyce | The Child Catchers: Rescue, Trafficking, and the New Gospel of Adoption

Doctor Ramani – Take your life back. (doctor-ramani.com)

The Adoption Experience | a podcast by Lynn Grubb (podbean.com)

The host of the podcast is not a lawyer or a therapist. The thoughts and opinions of the hosts and their guests are just that:thoughts and opinions.

Feb 15, 202352:52

Interview with Marilyn Huff

Marilyn Huff is an ally and advocate for adoptee rights. She is one of the founders of the Facebook group The Search Co-op, and is working on creating a database of the state laws that allow the retention of original birth certificates in adoptions.
Mentioned in the episode:
Debunking Reasons for Birth Certificate Revision:
docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1yAmvXE48P-fL3hz3ZZsWsNhkuCgjx65pDcKDz9YI5ws/edit?usp=sharing

State Code Birth Certificate Revision Spreadsheet:
docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1IyCC6wPTfQqtFUkZMsTS-RvR5U23aJyVafHYiLwQqQk/edit?usp=sharing
The Search Co-op: a private Facebook group for people interested in sharing resources to assist individuals to find family lost to adoption or donor conception. Please visit Fb to find the group and apply for membership if interested.
Greg Luce and AdopteeRightsLaw.com
Anti-Adoption: a public Facebook Group
The host is not a lawyer or a therapist. The opinions of the host and their guests are just that, opinions. Everybody has one.
Thank you for listening! Please consider rating the show so that we can be more visible and get the word out to more people about the need to change the laws and the narrative that underpin adoption. Much love, people!

Feb 13, 202301:37:17

Interview with Beth Figuls

Beth Figuls is a Baby Scoop Era California adoptee. California is nortoriously difficult to obtain original documents from. Please join us as we talk about how Beth obtained her identifying information.

California adoption laws: Adoption Records (ca.gov)

ICWA:Indian Child Welfare Act (ICWA) | Indian Affairs (bia.gov)

Bureau of Indian Affairs (BIA): Bureau of Indian Affairs (BIA) | Indian Affairs

ALMA: As far as I can ascertain, this organization no longer exists. Perhaps it does under another name? Please let me know if you know.

The opinions of the host and their guests are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer.

Dec 01, 202201:27:19

Interview with Daphne Keys

Daphne Keys is a Baby Scoop Era Maryland adoptee. Please join us as we discuss Daphnes attempts to obtain her identifying documents, the recent efforts by Maryland adoptees to pass legislation guaranteeing access, and how taking up quilting has been a source of therapy.

Mentioned in the show:

Baby Scoop Era: a period from 1945 to 1973 where a high rate of adoptions took place in the United States. Shame and coercion were common characteristics of this period. Similar practices occurred in other countries, with varying names given to the phenomenon.

Maryland Adoption Law: Maryland Original Birth Certificates | Adoptee Rights Law

SB331: A bill that would have allowed Maryland adoptees unrestricted access to their original birth certificates< regardless of year born .MD SB331 | 2021 | Regular Session | LegiScan

Catholic Charities: Catholic Charities is an arm of the Catholic Church that has been heavily involved in adoption for decades.

Unadoptable: a term used for children who were not considered suitable for adoption, usually due to disability or medical conditions, and other factors such as race, age or undesirable appearance.

The opinions of the host and their guest are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer.

Nov 18, 202201:44:36

A Talk about the Different Types of Adoption, with Paige Adams Strickland and Renee Gelin

Please join the host as they talk with domestic adoptee and author, Paige Adams Strickland and Renee Gelin, mother and one of the founders of Saving Our Sisters, about the different types of adoption common in the United States( and a lot of other places).
Paige is the author of two adoption memoirs and has contributed to several anthologies. Her books can be found at: Amazon.com: Paige Adams Strickland: Books, Biography, Blog, Audiobooks, Kindle. She blogs at: Akin to the Truth: A Memoir of Adoption and Identity (wordpress.com) She can be found on Facebook at Akin to the Truth
Mentioned in the episode:
Saving Our Sisters: Home - Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org)
Minnesota Adoption Law: Minnesota History of Closed Records and Reform Efforts | Minnesota Coalition for Adoption Reform (mnadoptreform.org)
History of California Adoption Law: History of Closed Records in California (livejournal.com)
Title IV, SSI Law regarding funds for adoption and legal guardianship: Social Security Act §473A (ssa.gov)
Kafala: How Adoption Is Practiced in Islam (learnreligions.com)
A great resource for information about the laws by state is: Adoptee Rights Law Center PLLC
The opinions of the host and their guests are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer.

Nov 05, 202201:48:57

Interview with Rich Clark

Richard Clark is a screenwriter and film music composer. He was born and adopted in the state of Hawaii.
Rich can be found on Twitter at @RCSoundworks
Mentioned in the interview:
Hawaii Adoption Law: Hawaii Original Birth Certificates | Adoptee Rights Law
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE): Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) | VitalSigns | CDC
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM): Psychiatry.org - DSM
Department of Defense(DOD): U.S. Department of Defense
Foreign Birth: Birth of U.S. Citizens Abroad (state.gov)
The opinions of the host and thier guests are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer

Oct 28, 202201:07:55

Interview with Mary Ellen Gambutti

Mary Ellen Gambutti is a South Carolina, Baby-Scoop Era adoptee. She is the author of numerous pieces in literary magazines, and the author of several books, including: I Must Have Wandered: An Adopted Air Force Daughter Recalls, Stroke Story, My Journey There and Back and Coming to Terms: My Journey Continues.

Her new memoir, I must have wandered, can be found at: https://books2read.com/ap/ngkMkl/Mary-Ellen-Gambutti

She can be found at : https://megam-author.com, https://www.linkedin.com/in/mary-ellen-gambutti-author/, www.instagram.com/maryelleng.author, www.facebook.com/M.E.Gambutti.Author/, twitter.com/melcmg

Mentioned in the show:

South Carolina Adoption Law: South Carolina Original Birth Certificates | Adoptee Rights Law

Baby Scoop Era: Baby Scoop Era - Wikipedia

The age of reason in the Catholic Church: Age of reason catholic (elrenosacredheart.com)

Ghost Kingdom: the imgainary family created by adoptees to fill in for the missing family lost through adoption

The FOG: sometimes referred to as Fear, Obligation, Guilt. The Fog for adoptees are the coping mechanisms adoptees develop in order to deal with the trauma of adoption when they lack the language and support system needed to navigate the loss at the root of adoption.

The opinions expressed in the podcast are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer.

Oct 21, 202201:23:48

interview with Annie Oxborough

Annie Oxborough is a New Zealand Baby Scoop Era adoptee. She is the author of the newly released book Where the Fuck is my Mother, illustrated by her brother Sparrow Phillips, a New Zealand artist. Annie can be found at:

annieo.co.nz https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100083122489253 and insta handle https://www.instagram.com/the_adopted_girl/. https://www.amazon.com/Where-Fuck-My-Mother-grown-up-ebook/dp/B0BCQX87RC/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1H2DEYSIRAGHH&keywords=where+the+fuck+is+my+mother&qid=1664391677&sprefix=where+the+fuck+is+my+mother%2Caps%2C258&sr=8-1

You can find Sparrow Phillips at: www.component.co.nz

Mentioned in the show:

The Adoption Act of 1955: Adoption Act 1955 No 93 (as at 28 October 2021), Public Act Contents – New Zealand Legislation

Royal Commission of Inquiry: Home | Abuse in Care - Royal Commission of Inquiry

Adult Adoption Information Act: Adult Adoption Information Act 1985 No 127 (as at 28 October 2021), Public Act – New Zealand Legislation

Bethany Salvation Army: Bethany Centre | The Salvation Army

Private Members BillMembers' bills - New Zealand Parliament (www.parliament.nz)

www.adopteereading.com

Mental health issues, including anorexia, bipolar disorder and depression. If you or anyone you know is experiencing a mental health crisis, please reach out to your local mental health network. Listed here are just a few.

New Zealand Mental Health: Home | Mental Health Foundation

Australia Mental Health: Mental Health Australia | (mhaustralia.org)

United Kingdom Mental Health: Mental Health UK - Forward Together (mentalhealth-uk.org)

Canada Mental Health: Mental health services - Canada.ca

USA Mental Health: National Hotline for Mental Health Crises and Suicide Prevention | NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness

Disclaimers: the opinions voiced by the host and their guests are just that, opinions. The host is not a lawyer or a therapist.

Sep 30, 202201:28:57

Interview with David Lang

Please join me as I speak with David Lang, an adoptee from the state of Connecticut. We talk about pursuing identity prior to the changes in Connecticut law in July of 2021, family surprises, and transporting cremains across an international border.
David can be found on Twitter at: @Revintheair
Mentioned on the episode:
Connecticut Adoption law: Adoptions and Foreign Births (ct.gov)
Catholic Charities: The Catholic church has been very active in facilitating adoption. If you were adopted through a Catholic agency, you can contact that agency or the Catholic Charities/Services where you were adopted and request non-identifying information and any documents they may have maintained. Access is dependent on the laws in your state or province. Unfortunately, the majority of records are closed. It never hurts to ask, though!
Mental Health hotline information
USA: NIMH » Suicide Prevention (nih.gov)
Canada: Mental health support: get help - Canada.ca
Australia: Crisis support - Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (aihw.gov.au)
New Zealand: Helplines | Mental Health Foundation
UK: United Kingdom Suicide Hotlines - Suicide.org! United Kingdom Suicide Hotlines, United Kingdom Suicide Hotlines, United Kingdom Suicide Hotlines, United Kingdom Suicide Hotlines!

The opinions expressed on the podcast are just that, opinions.
Thank you for listening!

Aug 07, 202201:21:03

Non Adoptee/ Adoptee Conversations: You were adopted a long time ago. Why are you still talking about it?

Please join me as i speak with:

Lynne Miller, Late Discovery Adoptee and writer at the blog adopteerevelations.com

Laureen Pittman: adoptee, author of the Lies that Bind

Andrea Coates: adoptee ally, search angel and LCSW

Lynn Grubb: adoptee, adoptee advocate, author of Hidden Identity

Plenary Adoption: plenary adoption, as practiced in many places including the United States, is a form of adoption that terminates the relationship between an adoptees family and the adoptee. Records are usually sealed and unavailable to the adoptee, even as an adult. In most cases, adoptive parents are given the option to replace the adopted persons original birth certificate with a legal fiction that changes the adoptees name and may also alter details such as place of birth, race and nationality,

The opinions of the host and their guests are just that: our opinions

Adoptee/non adoptee conversations are especially crucial as we confront the consequences of the recent ruling by the Supreme Court, overturning Roe v Wade. The decision has profound implications for adoption, the child welfare system, family preservation efforts and human rights. As the responsibility shifts to the states, adoptees will increasingly need kept people to ally themselves with the adoptee community to enact legislation protecting our rights to our own identities and agency. This statement does not ignore all of the other fuckery involved in the denial of womens reproductive rights. This is an adoptee advocacy platform. Adoption is not the solution to abortion. Stop conflating adoption with abortion. Thank you

Jun 25, 202201:29:03

Interview with Dr. Kristy Howell

Dr. Kristy Howell is an adult adoptee in reunion. She was born and adopted in the sealed state of Mississippi. She is a Sustainability expert and trained historian. Kristy can be found at @kwittman on twitter and on instagram.
Mentioned in the show:
Mississippi adoption laws: adopteerightslaw.com
ISRR: International Soundex Reunion Registry: International Soundex Reunion Registry - ISRR This used to be one of the few resources available to adoptees hoping to find family. Today, DNA testing has largely made reunion registries unnecessary.
Adoptee Rights Law: Attorney and adoptee Greg Luce maintains an up to date easily accessed list of the laws regulating adoptee access to records for every state. He includes links to the legislation which makes further research easier.
Search Angels: Search angels are individuals with trainig and experience in conducting searches for adoptees. Search angels are FREE. Groups like the Search Squad on FB receive training in genetic genealogy, and have been vetted for reliability. Please do some research prior to sharing your personal information with anyone offering to be your search angel. DNA detectives on Facebook is a good group to join and ask for references. Search Squad is affiliated with them.
The Adoptee Community, aka Adopteeland: there are a number of free, online resources for adoptees. Not every group will align with every adoptees needs, but groups exist for many different situations: Late Discovery, Anti adoption, Reunion support, Trauma support, LGBTQ adoptees, adoptee writers, artists, inter-country adoptees, transracial adoptees, etc. You may have to try a few before you find some that fit, but, for the most part, finding these groups can be a tremendous relief. Facebook, Tiktok, Instagram, Twitter are good places to look for groups.
Adoptee-informed therapy: finding an adoptee-informed therapist can be a huge boon. The search can be lengthy. for a list of questions that can help you find a good fit in a therapist, please see the article linked here. theadoptionfilescom.wordpress.com/2021/06/17/healing-the-wounds/
Adoptee-informed therapy: finding an adoptee-informed therapist can be a huge boon. The search can be lengthy. For a list of questions that can help you find a good fit in a therapist, please see the article linked here. theadoptionfilescom.wordpress.com/2021/06/17/healing-the-wounds/
Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer. Opinions voiced on the podcast by the host and their guests are our opinions.
If you happen to recognize the book referenced by Dr Howell at the beginning of the podcast, please contact the host and let them know the title.
If you woulld like to be a guest on the podcast, please let the host know. I am invested in amplifying the voices of adoptees, adoptee allies and others impacted by adoption law. Thank you for listening!

Jun 18, 202201:31:34

Interview with Renee Gelin, founder and president of Saving our Sisters

Please join me as I speak with Renee Gelin, mom of a son lost to an unnecessary adoption. She is also the founder and president of the organization, Saving our Sisters. Renee and I discuss her experience with the adoption industry, which motivated her to advocate for other women in crisis. Renee is an avid ally of adoptees as well.

Renees' organization can be found at savingoursistersadoption.org Saving our Sisters works to assist pregnant women in making informed decisions about their pregnancies, and to provide assistance so that they can avoid applying permanent solutions to temporary situations.

Mentioned in the show:

Parentfinders: a website whose purpose is to funnel women in crisis into the adoption industry

Books: basically catalogs of slick advertising campaigns designed to persuade women in crisis to choose a prospective adoptive parent or PAP to raise their child

Gladney Adoption Agency: an adoption agency

Open Adoption: an arrangement whereby ongoing contact is maintained between the adoptee and their family of origin. These agreements must be written into the contract at the time of termination of parental rights. Even if this occurs, open adoption agreements are not generally enforceable. The adoption industry advertises open adoptions while actually using the idea of open adoption to persuade parents to surrender children. Their idea of open is to simply encourage adoptive parents to disclose the adoption to the adoptee.

The Primal Wound, by Nancy Verrier. A book written by an adoptive parent based on her observations of the effect of adoption on adoptees.

The Body Keeps the Score, by Bessel Van der Kolk. The Body Keeps the Score - Wikipedia

Persuasive Coercion: coercive practices that are emotional and psychological in nature, rather than by force or threat of violence

Florida Adoption law: adopteerightslaw.com, Consumer Pamphlet: Adoption In Florida – The Florida Bar

Disclaimer: the opinions of the host and their guest are just that, our opinions.

May 22, 202202:05:23

Non-Adoptee/Adoptee conversations: a talk with Andrea Coates about respectful dialogue

Andrea is a licensed clinical social worker. She is also a search angel with the Search Squad. Andrea was one of the first people I interviewed when I began this podcast. A non-adoptee, or Kept person, Andrea has devoted a great deal of energy to an intentional exploration of adoptees lived experience. Through countless hours of reading adoptee memoir, blogs and articles; listening to podcasts and viewing recordings, and via her work as a search angel, Andrea has worked to become informed and to gain a greater understanding of how adoption impacts adopted people.
Mentioned in the show/ Resources:
DNA Detectives: a private Facebook group founded by CeCe Moore, genetic genealogist. The group is dedicated to assisting people with genetic genealogy work
Search Squad: Search Squad is a private Facebook group which provides free assistance for adoptees, birth parents, biological family through trained, vetted volunteers
Family Preservation: attempts to provide assistance to families with the intent of keeping families together.
The Girls Who Went Away: by Ann Fessler. This book is an important discussion of the history of coercive treatment of unwed pregnant women sent away to give birth in secret in the decades prior to Roe v Wade. The children born were lost to adoption or to the foster care system.
Adopteereading.com: a website dedicated to providing a list of books written by or recommended by adoptees.
Finding Family: my search for roots and the secrets in my DNA, by Richard HIll. Hill's memoir recounts his use of DNA to unravel the secrets of his origins.
Adoptee podcasts and blogs: There are many good lists of podcasts and blogs by adoptees that can be found by simply googling Adoptee podcasts and Adoptee blogs. I have partial lists included with these two blog posts:
theadoptionfilescom.wordpress.com/2022/01/14/adoptee-podcasts/
theadoptionfilescom.wordpress.com/2022/01/14/adoptee-blogs/
Baby Scoop Era: a period from approximately 1946 to 1975(dates vary) where coercive adoption industry practices resulted in up to four million babies being given up for adoption in the United States alone. Similar practices occurred in other countries.

May 20, 202201:29:57

Birthdays and Gotcha days

The host shares a few thoughts on adoption and birthdays and gotcha days.

May 11, 202216:56

Interview with Laureen Pittman

Laureen Pitman is a Baby Scoop Era adoptee, born and raised in the closed state of California. Laureen is the author of the memoir The Lies that Bind. She is active in the adoptee community, writing for her blog adoptionmytruth.com, participating in roundtables like The Red Couch Rebuttal, contributing to the anthology The Adoptee Survival Guide, and in other projects.
Mentioned in the podcast:
California Adoptee Access laws: adopteerightslaw.com Adoption Records (ca.gov) Please be aware that each county may have slightly different procedures and forms available for adoptees. California is a sealed state.
Waiver of Confidentiality: California requires adoptees and family members to file a waiver giving permission for contact to be included in the adoptees file. If the adoptee and a family member have both filed a waiver saying Yes, they agree to contact, the state is supposed to pass on the contact information.
Non-Identifying information: California adoptees can contact the county where their adoption took place or go through the Adoption Records portal listed above to request their redacted information.
Private Investigator: adoptees sometimes resort to hiring a private investigator to assist with searching for family members. This can be quite expensive. Always remember to check to see if the person is licensed, reputable investigator. You can go to bsis.ca.gov to check license status.
Ghost family/Kingdom: first coined by Betty Jean Lipton, this refers to the fantasy family created by adoptees as stand-ins for the family we have been separated from
CUB, Concerned United Birthparents: a support group for parents and adoptees. concernedunitedbirthparents.org
Commercial DNA companies: there are a number of commercial DNA companies that are useful for adoptees. They have DNA tests as well as subscription services for their databases. The largest company is Ancestry.com. 23andme.com is popular for medical information as well as matches. other companies include My Heritage, Gedmatch, and Familytreedna
Search assistance: on Facebook, there are the DNA Detectives, the Search Squad, the Search Co-op. There are others, but these are the three I am familiar with. A search angel provides assistance for FREE.
Because there is a lot going on in the community right now with the SCOTUS announcement and conflation of adoption with abortion, and because this is going out on Mother's day, I am including the contact information for mental health hotlines. It is important that we be kind to ourselves and give ourselves permission to seek help when we need it.
National Mental Health Hotline | 866-903-3787
Mental health support: get help - Canada.ca
Mental Health Helpline for Urgent Help - NHS (www.nhs.uk)
Helplines - Immediate confidential free support | Mental Health Commission (mhc.wa.gov.au)
Finding an adoptee competent therapist can be challenging. One source I have found is Growbeyondwords.com. I suggest asking specific questions to determine if a therapist is trauma competent. You can find support from the online adoptee community as well. Check out my earlier blog posts for lists of podcasts, and blogs.

May 08, 202201:30:50

Adoptee Access and the state of Vermont

A thank you to those who worked so hard on behalf of Vermont adoptees, and a plea to see other states follow their lead. Vermont is only the eleventh state to allow adoptees access to their original documents.

May 02, 202208:17