How To Be A Boss At Ageing

In this episode Anniki interviews Rebecca Schiller about her new book - Earthed and they talk about writing, rural life (and the myths around how idyllic it is) and mental health. Rebecca was diagnosed with ADHD there’s also an ad for Anniki’s book - please do buy if you haven’t already!

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In this episode Anniki interviews coach Mandy Manners about how our relationship with alcohol shifted during lockdown and many of us upped the ante. This doesn't have to represent a problem necessarily but if you feel that now rules are relaxing, your relationship with booze has become problematic then this episode is for you. They discuss why drinking is so much part of the British culture, how to socialise sober and when it might be a good opportunity to kick drinking altogether.

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In this episode Anniki talks to Emma Worrollo about how we can be more playful. As we get older there can be a tendency to be a bit rigid in our mindset and to tell ourselves that we aren't playful or that it's silly. It's also common for many mums to feel out of control and anxious when play gets 'out of hand'. So how can we cut loose sometimes and be less regimented in our parenting style?

In this episode Anniki talks about breathing and breath work with Jessica Harrod who is an expert in this area. They discuss why we often pant and hold our breathe when we're busy and distracted and how this leads to anxiety/anger and a feeling of being out of control. Jess also does a quick and easy breathing technique that you can integrate into your day if you're feeling on edge and not quite yourself. At the end of the day breathing is something that we don't really think about but it plays a pivotal role in how we feel emotionally so creating more awareness can be really helpful - whether you suffer with anxiety or whether you just want to feel stronger and better equipped to deal with whatever life throws in your direction.

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In this episode Anniki interviews Maisie Hill who has written a brilliant book all about perimenopause. The thing is it’s a subject that really needs demystifying as so many women don’t really understand what the difference is between menopause and perimenopause, don’t really know how to navigate the world of supplements/HRT and therefore suffer in silence or go to their GP on the back foot and not aware of what the next step might be. One of the key things Maisie advises is tracking your periods so you become more aware of your cycle, how you feel on different days and whether there are fluctuations as you approach menopause. They also discuss Maisie’s early days living in New York and how Anniki has always dreamed about living there but sadly seems to have missed the boat.

In this episode Anniki speaks to Gayle Haddock about her role helping women feel more confident so they can develop their business ideas. The thing is starting your own business is really hard work and it pays to be cautious when you look at social media and it looks like a breeze. They also chat about the terrible term ‘side hustle’ and why we need to be mindful that not everyone has to have one especially if you’re feeling overwhelmed. They also chat about how buying dungarees is an addiction and how that comes at a cost.

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In this episode Anniki talks about tarot with Alice Grist and how we can use it to get guidance during challenging times. They also talk about how people can have negative experiences with Tarot which maybe switches them off. Alice specializes in making women feel better about their lives but also sees the danger of ‘bad readings’. She demystifies tarot so it’s something women can use more regularly themselves.

In this episode Anniki interviews sobriety and wellbeing coach (and one half of Love Sober) Kate Baily about addiction and how it’s often linked back to trauma. They talk about how trauma is often relative, and what can seem ‘small’ to one person is gigantic to the person who’s experienced it. They also discuss the general sense of heightened anxiety that we’re all feeling at the moment, and the physically uncomfortable feelings anxiety brings to the surface. They also provide advice on a more holistic tool kit to help soothe ourselves during challenging times.

Follow Kate Baily on IG: @katebailycoach @lovesober.cic @loveyourselfsober

In this episode Anniki interviews broadcaster and comedienne Kelly Ford also known as ‘Book of Mum’ about surviving lockdown and learning to appreciate the small things. Kelly is heavily pregnant and about to have a baby and they talk about TV, crying, tantrums and being at the end of their tethers. They also try and find some ‘silver linings’ in these challenging times.

In this episode Anniki interviews Jemma Thomas who runs The Hub- an online women’s exercise community. They discuss how movement can make you feel much better mentally and how you can snap out of seeing yourself as someone ‘who doesn’t exercise’ to someone who does small bits of exercise more regularly. They also talk about common sabotage techniques like telling yourself you’ll do it later and forever finding alternatives to do instead or saying that you’ll workout once you have the right outfit/bit of kit. Exercise is important if you want to shift some of those negative emotions but it’s worth remembering that there will be days when you really can’t do it and that’s okay too. It’s not about putting lots of pressure on yourself- it’s more about finding something you can get into a habit of doing and doing it, then doing it some more.

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I'm taking a short break from the podcast until early 2021, I'll be back with more great guests and experts in the New Year so make  sure to stay subscribed to be the first to hear new episodes.

In the meantime have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

In this weeks episode Anniki talks about grief and loss with psychotherapist and author Anna Mathur. It's a tricky episode if you've just lost someone but hopefully will offer some tips and support on how to navigate each day and cope with difficult feelings. Please do share if you think it will help someone who is going through tough times and needs coping strategies.

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In this episode Anniki talks to Helen Serafinowicz, the writer of the hit TV series Motherland about all things motherhood and writing related. They touch on tension in motherhood (and how Helen had to wear a neck brace from lack of sleep and Anniki lost two teeth) and on how tough it can be (it’s rewarding too of course but they possibly talk less about this). Motherland has a special Christmas episode coming out so watch out – it’s SOMETHING to look forward to in these trying times anyway...

In this lockdown special episode Anniki talks to Kim Palmer who founded the Clementine app. Kim and Anniki talk about anxiety at work, and offer up tips on tangible things to try if you’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed. Anniki also does some outdoor recording from her local park and offers tips on how to get through lockdown (including the merits of a sausage sandwich and going on the slide).

In this episode Anniki talks to Neeley Moore who became a mum at forty-five. They discuss the experience of being older parents and how it’s both tiring and inspiring at the same time. Neeley also talks openly about her path to parenthood and how she tried IVF and then opted for a double donor. They also talk about swimming outdoors and why it’s something to perhaps trial in these cold, winter months.

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In this episode Anniki talks to Sam Baker about her book 'The Shift- How I lost and found myself after 40- and you can too.' They discuss why the attitude to men ageing versus women is so different, how menopause can take us by surprise and how we become increasingly invisible. They also talk about Anniki's chin hair and how older women are expected to embrace linen in a big way. And why are so many female bosses seen as 'batty old women' or 'heartless bitches'?

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In this episode Anniki focuses on art and creativity. She interviews the up and coming artist Sharon Walters about how she became a full-time artist, the things that inspire her and how she plucked up the courage to make art her proper career. We also talk about the lack of diversity in art and how black women are under-represented. Anniki obviously isn’t an expert in this area and would never claim to be. She is trying to educate herself and learn as much as possible. At the end they discuss how we can all access our creative side and use it to help fight anxiety and more.

Follow me on Instagram @annikisommerville

Do you get fed up being told what to wear and what's 'allowed' in your forties? Do you feel like the fashion industry can be tyrannical at times? How do you feel about clothes as you get older? In this episode Anniki interviews Kate Hiscox. Kate works in the music industry and is an influential fashion blogger (@wearsmymoney on IG). They discuss why there are no rules when you get into your forties (in fact there aren't really any rules anyway), the concept of feeling confident in your 'look' and why crocs are not tolerated in her household (well they are but she doesn't rate them highly).

Follow me on Instagram @annikisommerville

And, if you want to join the 'How to Be a Boss at Ageing' Facebook group which is full of tips, support and more information from the podcast series - search for 'How to Be a Boss at Ageing' on Facebook and the moderator will let you in!

In this episode of the new series Anniki talks to Meg Mathews about the extremely discombobulating experience that is THE MENOPAUSE. Whilst our mothers’ generation might have suffered with hot flushes and mood swings in silence, we are now at the stage where we’re talking about it more. Nonetheless there’s work to be done with many women being taken by surprise by the symptoms of menopause and peri-menopause and feeling anxious and alone because they’re unsure as to whether what they’re feeling is normal or not. There’s also a myriad of different vitamins and supplements targeting menopausal women and then there’s HRT with women scared to take it or unsure of what the benefits might be. So if you’re approaching menopause and want to be better prepared or simply a fan of Meg...this is episode is right up your street.

Meg’s book here:

Don’t you feel like women sometimes have their head in the sand when it comes to money? And this in turn impacts on the choices we make (or don’t make) and the culture of fear around checking our bank balances and taking control rather than letting money or a lack of it control us. In this episode Anniki interviews Clare Seal who is the creator of the My Frugal Year Instagram account and author of Real Life Money: An Honest Guide To Taking Control Of Your Finances. Clare found herself in a large amount of debt (27k) last year and has documented the challenges of getting to grips with money and re-paying some of that debt. They talk about how money is often not the real issue, the challenges of finding cheap things to do with kids and how to take the first few steps into understanding your finances and feeling more in control of what you spend.

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Clare’s book available here:

In this weeks episode Anniki talks about anxiety and why heading into our forties and fifties can exacerbate difficult feelings. Past trauma, hormones and the way western society judges older women conspire to make women feel invisible, pessimistic and like they have nothing to bring to the table. Anniki interviews Dr Becky Quicke who is a clinical psychologist who runs both personal programmes and retreats for women. They talk about why perimenopause and menopause can be tricky times for women emotionally, how women can navigate through and why whales seem to have it sussed menopause wise.

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Dr Becky Quicke’s website for more information on support and retreats:

https://www.beckyquicke.com/home/4594542159

For support from the NHS and ore information:

In this episode Anniki (who struggled to conceive for many years) interviews Cat Strawbridge about how infertility impacts on our lives as we get older, how it's still taboo to talk about IVF, how nobody really tells you how tough it is, how it doesn't always work, and how we need to share our experiences so that women are better prepared for what lies ahead should they have to go down this route. Cat has had multiple rounds of fertility treatment and was finally successful last year. She has previously worked for the Fertility Network charity and has a podcast called 'Finally Pregnant.' She also runs events for women who are trying to conceive.

Resources: Cat's Instagram is @tryingyears

Our relationship with work is complicated. By the time we get to our forties we may have fallen slightly out of love with the meetings, politics, gossip, meaningless team building exercises, passwords that have to change every three days and young, fresh talent making us feel like we don't really matter anymore or have anything meaningful to offer. This week Anniki talks to author Annie Auerbach all about how to feel more confident in our day jobs, how work doesn't have to be the be all and end all and how to stop feeling threatened by millennials and learn great things from them instead. Annie is the author of 'Flex: The Modern Woman's Handbook' and a big advocate for flexible working (which in theory everyone should be getting used to now that many of us are working at home (if we're lucky enough to have jobs during these testing times).

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