Badly Optimized Podcast

Badly Optimized Podcast

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By Badly Optimized
A Podcast about games and poor life choices.
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Season 1 is now considered archived! The reasoning behind this is that when we started the Badly Optimized Podcast, we had some ideas for how the show should be, what the format is and how often it should release (hahaha weekly remember that?!). As each episode released, the show moved further and further from the original pitch, but has turned into something that we think is much more fun to listen to!

Long story short - New listeners go straight to Season 2, Season 1 isn't fully representitive of what the show has become!
Available on 9 platforms
S02 - E14 - And then they fuck
We’re sorry everyone. We’re sorry for delaying this episode for so long and we’re sorry that after a month of waiting we release this. Just kidding we ain’t sorry and its also a pretty great episode! Slam this bad boy into your ears and expect comical discussion about Video Games! And lot’s of other stuff. Also in this weeks episode: Jack visits a dark place! We retire our season 2 theme song with a full play! Snakes with legs! Crossbuy/PS1 Mini talk A very delayed discussion on Telltales Games (but to be fair they were as bad as us for delays)
1:14:10
October 10, 2018
S02 - E13 - Have some fucks then feed the ducks
This episode was uploaded exactly 14 days after the previous one. I know, we're shocked too! But what's in store in the penultimate episode of season 2? You can expect a FIRE, exactly one new video game, a couple of older games and a THRILLING update in the Pizza Hut Saga! And a load of nonsense questions for some reason.... Links Anchor http://badlyoptimized.website Facebook http://facebook.badlyoptimized.website Tom's Twitter http://tom.badlyoptimized.website Jack's Twitter http://jack.badlyoptimized.website Youtube http://youtube.badlyoptimized.website Patreon https://www.patreon.com/B0PCAST
46:35
September 7, 2018
S02 - E12 - I'm not a Paedo
Heck. In this (basically) on time episode, your two favourite idiots talk about quite a lot of games including Deathgarden, Monster Hunter World, Hunt: Showdown AND MORE! And as this is a Video Game podcast there is also discussion about disenchantment, that new cartoon thing, and a load of questions including an exciting new entry in the Pizza Hut Saga! Links that are in the description: Anchor http://badlyoptimized.website Facebook http://facebook.badlyoptimized.website Tom's Twitter http://tom.badlyoptimized.website Jack's Twitter http://jack.badlyoptimized.website Youtube http://youtube.badlyoptimized.website Only suckers pay for expensive .co.uk web domains.
1:06:22
August 24, 2018
S02 - E11 - Hard Hitting Life Lessons
Oh boy you folks are in for a treat. This lucid episode was recorded in the MORNING. THE SACRIFICES WE MAKE FOR YOU LOT IN ORDER TO ALMOST GET THIS OUT ON TIME. But anyway, the latest episode in this fortnightly podcast that releases every three weeks features: Hard Hitting Journalism Video Games Porn Reviews And much more. Yeah that does say Porn reviews.
58:06
August 9, 2018
S02 - E10 - We did it! It was us!
Coming up in this extra special short version of the Badly Optimized Podcast: - Sweat! - DayZ is good now?!?! - Dead by Daylight is bad now?!?! - Sweat If those bullet points don't entice you enough, theres also at least two jokes hidden inside this episode.
43:19
July 20, 2018
S02 - E09 - Ghosts of........ Japan
AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH We all know that's your reaction when you saw that your "FAVOURITE" podcast came back after lengthy delays with an incredibly late post E3 episode. Yeah, this episode was recorded so late that there's very little E3 chat and instead we move on to more important things in the gaming world. Like Tom's trip to Alton Towers and Jack's shitty mobile games. He plays that garbage so we don't have to!
45:58
June 30, 2018
S02 - E08 - Where would the Knife go?
E3 In this timely episode, Jack and Tom make some uneducated guesses about what might make an appearance at E3. Some things have already been proven true or false in between recording and uploading this episode - but thankfully their future selves sent back a robot to correct them. Also there is a little talk about games that you can actually play RIGHT NOW (or not, 'cos one of the is DayZ which is not a game it is a war crime).
1:16:18
June 4, 2018
S02 - E07 - You're our number 4
In this very late episode your Tom and Jack get ready for summer - which basically means they sweat a lot and feel like they want to die. But enough about that, what’s in the podcast? Bloody loads! There are stinky hot takes on Wild West Online, Euro Trucking, a little PUBG story, more mobile game talk and some things that should probably have been edited out. P.S Sorry it’s late but shit happens
53:59
May 22, 2018
S02 - E06 - Won't somebody PLEASE think of the Children?!
Oooft. 20 Episodes, the big two-ohh. This is a very special episode, as you might imagine, where Jack and Tom once again talk about loads of stuff not related to videoga.. Wait what? Oh Well then. In this episode of the Badly Optimized Podcast which is acout video games they DO talk about video games! Loads of them! Yakuza Kiwami, Snake Pass, Runescape (yes again), F3AR, Stardew Valley and more. They also take on the easiest target of hate in the gaming industry which is the cess pool of mobile gaming! But it's not all hate and misery as they each have one terrible game and one good game to talk about! Finally the fan favourite "Reading about Fortnite in the SUN and laughing at parents who talk to the papers instead of just doing parenting" segment makes a tremendous come back (Yes it is low hanging fruit but it's still funny!)
55:37
May 4, 2018
S02 - E05 - The Bible (Abridged Version)
In this extra special episode we discover the effects of doing Accountancy on Tom (do drugs or something instead, numbers are bad for you) while Jack finds a newfound talent for making the bible cool enough for school! There’s also talk about Titan Quest and Garrys Mod in addition to extra treats such as a surprise intermission AND another stupid news article about hit video game Fortnite in shitty tabloid press!
49:30
April 19, 2018
S02 - E04 - I can fuck with that
In this high octane episode: VIDEO GAMES! You heard it folks, we actually played some video games recently! This episode features a steamy hot take of Sea of Thieves: The new game thats cool to hate! We also dig up some obscure games from our past which is pretty neat. We even talk about the now defunct Grainger Games with a brilliant old news story! And Look how long this episode is! We really spoiled you lot this week!
57:20
April 5, 2018
S02 - E03 - Bad Boys
In this very special ON TIME EPISODE - the well runs dry as Jack talks about getting kicked out of schools while Tom talks about slightly funny moments from his boring life. Then we talk about GAMES. Not video games though, but a pair of fun group Board Games! Look we will play video games in time for Episode 18 okay......
47:09
March 22, 2018
S02 - E02 - Breaking and Entering
In this incredibly hard to upload episode - More Bike Stories! Rainbow Six Siege! Our very own Gaming Expo (Tickets start at £20 just paypal it to us and we will sort it). Yeah not the best description but I wrote a really good one and it got lost in the hellish uploading process. Hell I don't even know if its going to work this time so I should copy and paste this travesty somewhere just in case Anchor breaks yet again.
55:00
March 9, 2018
S02 - E01 - There was a Goose
This is a very special episode which mainly consists of a bunch of stories and such, featuring such characters as: The Goose, A Condom, An old Vietnamese bloke, severe body odour and Dean "Rocket" Hall. How does this all tie together? Well to be honest it doesn't theres loads of separate stories but they are all funny. Or maybe even hilarious but that's for you listeners to decide (please tell us its hilarious).
53:49
February 22, 2018
S01 - E14 - The Floatlands Episode
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! In this very special epsiode we manage to fail to live up to our new release shedule! What we don't fail to do is bring you guys a pair of super interesting indie developers from Slovenia! Doman and Tadej are working on a game called Floatlands and in this episode which I don't want to call an interview, more a casual chat, we talk about the game itself, behind the scenes and what it was like working with a publisher! We managed to sprinkle talk about other games throughout the episode, while busting out a surprise ending where we discuss our disappointments! (The optimism did not last long)
59:46
February 12, 2018
S01 - E13 - 2017 The Current Year
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! A very special triumphant return! 2018 brings with it…. A podcast all about 2017. Yeah. But hey we finally got around to the much hyped story of why Jack lived in a garage! And it’s a doozy! The majority of the podcast is our thoughts on the games of 2017, the good the bad and the mediocre! We also look forward to 2018 with games we are excited for, and games we are even more excited for! No negativity here, not on this podcast! (New year new us etc). The podcast will be moving to a fortnightly schedule now, but we will be aiming closer to an hour long each episode along with more guests and maaaaaaybe better production values but we aren’t miracle workers!
1:01:34
January 25, 2018
S01 - E12 - Anime are just cartoons!
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! In this very special 12th episode of 'The Badly Optimized Podcast' Jack & Tom are pushed for time so instead of CUMMING up with an idea they steal questions off 'Yahoo answers' and turn that into some sort of podcast format, we also discuss our disappointments because nobody has complained that we keep doing it so we're going to keep doing it, ALRIGHT!? Also this week features special guest 'The hosts desperately trying not to say the word fuck'.
46:37
December 14, 2017
S01 - E11 - Family Friendly Podcast
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! In this very special 11th episode of 'The Badly Optimized Podcast' Jack & Tom are joined by their mate Sam L to discuss Runescape & Minecraft over the years and some of their personal experiences on the games. We next decide to make the podcast more sponsorship friendly by adhering to OFCOM rules on bad words and naughty phrases with some hilarious input from the still with us Sam L. Also we finish on our disappointments because, it's our thing, okay? Is that okay? Can we have our thing? Yeah thanks. You Cum Licker
49:51
December 7, 2017
S01 - E10 - Where Is The Human Heart
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! In this very special 10th episode of 'The Badly Optimized Podcast' Jack and Tom talk about their game console history along with their favorite games on said consoles. As always we round out the show with a few disappointments and an exclusive story behind the reason 'Mortal Kombat' has a 'K' instead of a 'C'. WE MADE IT TO TEN EPISODES!!!!
51:06
November 30, 2017
S01 - E09 - Why Would You Do That?
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! In this very special 9th episode of 'The Badly Optimized Podcast' we talk about extreme sports games back in ye good ole days, the bad new times of extreme sports games. Some 'Normal' games that don't involve you defying the laws of physics (kinda) and to wrap it up as always are some more of our disappointments. This week also features special guest REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
43:11
November 23, 2017
S01 - E08 - eSports Drama
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! In this very special 8th episode of the Badly Optimized Podcast we are joined by Adam from Medway Gaming. In this episode we talk about the joys of creating a small League of Legends tournament, the drama behind the scenes, the mind of a LoL player, what to do if you get hacked & how best to react, some RTS games we enjoyed, CSGO voice chat, in game pay to skin and as always to cap off our podcast we delve into some of our disappointments.
58:16
November 16, 2017
S01 - E07 - Clickbait Title
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! Also known as Episode 7 - You won't believe what happens at the end! Damn podcast RSS has a 30 character title limit! Anyway, in this very special episode we talk about click bait Facebook gaming pages, what the UK equivalent of living in your parents basement is, a range of MOBA games and of course it wouldn't be the badly optimized podcast if we didn't finish with a couple more disappointments!! Tune in next week for a very special guest!
44:02
November 9, 2017
S01 - E06 - I'll Make You Sick Now
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! The very special sixth episode of 'The Badly Optimized Podcast, where we are joined by our friend Sam L to talk about Micro-transaction shame and generally shill the hell out of Dead By Daylight (Please give us money dev team). Add in a horror game called Deceit and memorable boss fights and we have ourselves a podcast! For a very special treat this eposide features Jack dropping in and out of the Podcast near the end!
58:13
November 2, 2017
S01 - E05 - I'll get you started
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! The very special late fifth episode of 'The Badly Optimized Podcast, because Jack was sleeping when he should be recording. We talk about games that got canceled and some we love but can't recommend
46:02
October 26, 2017
S01 - E04 - Bonus Outtakes!
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! A special two minute compilation of bloopers, singing and disconnection. We thought it was funny anyway...
02:12
October 12, 2017
S01 - E04 - I'll Edit This Out
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! The very special fourth episode of BOP, where we talk about movie games, game movies and game movie games! We then move on to some Kickstarter talk and some cheat based shenanigans!
47:17
October 12, 2017
S01 - E03 - The WarZ Special
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! The very very special third episode of 'The Badly Optimized Podcast, where Tom has emerged from his underwater dwelling where he recorded last week and we talk about 'WarZ' and 'Last Man Standing'.
43:13
October 5, 2017
S01 - E02 - Badge Of Dishonour
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! The very special second episode of 'The Badly Optimized Podcast, where we talk about some of the games that we truly got sucked into, then we go back into some multiplayer gaming and then to round it
47:17
September 29, 2017
S01 - E01 - Good Trash
Archived Episode: The Badly Optimized Podcast has changed and morphed over the months, new listeners are reccomended to start with Season 2! Season 1 was very much a learning experience and as such we consider it archived! The very special first episode, where we talk about some of our fondest gaming memories and favorite multiplayer moments, with a delve into some of our biggest gaming disappointment to finish!
45:59
September 24, 2017
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