The Slumflower Hour

Why are straight women so helplessly bound to their heterosexuality? How can straight women gain more from their attraction to men without losing themselves? What do straight women keep doing wrong to further reinforce their suffering?

In this episode, Chidera visits the various ways straight women betray themselves in exchange for 'love' from men...

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower

Do Black women benefit from 'race first' solidarity in their dating decisions?

Is Black women's appreciation of Black men reciprocated?

Are we moving towards a society where interracial relationships are becoming more popular as a form of Black women's resistance to intra-communal suffrage and misogynoir?

Whilst this episode is deeply controversial, join The Slumflower as she discusses divesting from solely dating Black men, and what going where the love is looks like...

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower

In an age where we feel compelled to prove we are loved, is sharing pictures of your boyfriend on social media a risky move? Do we jinx it by claiming men in public too soon? Do men benefit from us posting them online as our partners?

In this episode, Chidera discusses why she is averse to the idea of sharing pictures of your new boyfriend on social media - and why the relief of not posting him might be worth it if/when he pisses you off!

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower

This episode was voted for by my patrons over on Patreon!

In an age where women seem to not grasp that men are swindling them for sex, what can we do to raise our awareness of the ways men passively control women to get what they want from us?

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower

Are you easily swindled by a man's enthusiastic advances? Are you in a hurry to believe what a man says if it means you can have a relationship to claim? Do you need to mentally fortify yourself with the strength to dodge lovebombing?

If any of the above questions resonate, this one's for you!

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower

In this fun storytime, join The Slumflower as she spills the details of her encounter with a rather generous submissive man... ;)

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

This episode was voted for by my patrons over on Patreon!

Do you find yourself panicking on first dates? Does your overthinking breed overcompensation? Are you scared of awkward silences?

If you resonate with any of the above questions, this episode is definitely for you!

Dating should be fun and in this short and sweet episode, join The Slumflower as she talks you through fun ways to get through dating without getting yourself too involved. ;)

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower

Are you still on your digital quest for love? Is the dating app fatigue kicking in? Have you started checking the dating apps more than you check Instagram? It might be time for a breather...

In this episode, Chidera speaks on why she thinks you should quit dating apps once and for all!

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

In the highly anticipated first episode of SEASON 2, The Slumflower joins forces with the unstoppable comedian: Katherine Ryan!

Is having a man's children the ultimate betrayal? Should women dominate their husbands? Are breadwinner wives doomed?

It all goes down in this hilarious, truthful and vulnerable episode...

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower

This is the FINAL episode of The Slumflower Hour podcast's first ever season and of course, we had to wrap this up in style!

It is with great honour to introduce to you, MISTRESS MARLEY: the professional dominatrix and sex educator, who took social media by storm with a viral video of her taking a leashed, kneeling, elderly, white male sub to her homecoming.

Since the viral moment was documented in The New York Times, Mistress Marley has gone on to expand further into her dominance as a profession, taking on celebrity male clients and making six figures a year, centering reparations in her work and using her platform to teach other women how to become dominatrixes - all whilst throwing kink parties and fostering community for Black people in kink!

In this conversation, join Chidera and Mistress Marley as they both muse on dating as dominatrixes, learning how to tell men what to do, common misconceptions about dominating men and the various ways being a dominatrix can provide useful transferrable skills for everyday life.

You can find Mistress Marley at:

@hausofmarley on Instagram

@eyesxonfire on Twitter

Mistress Marley's domination courses: https://www.patreon.com/sexcademy

Are relationships your comfort zone? Are you scared of being alone? Have you spent more time being in relationships, than being single?

You may really benefit from this episode if you resonate with any of the above questions!

In this episode, join The Slumflower as she discusses living a life you aren’t in a hurry to escape from, developing the confidence to walk away from men and choosing your life, not settling for it.

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Get my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Do you fear that you 'owe' men something in return for their kindness? Are you self-deprecating and unable to see yourself as worthy of receiving? Do you feel bad when men go out of their way for you?

If you answered 'yes' to any of these questions, this episode is definitely for YOU!

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

As complex and unique as we all are, there are still traits we share in common - depending on what period of the year we were born in!

Join The Slumflower as she discusses the weaknesses and strengths of your zodiac sign - and even if you don't resonate with astrology, you may learn a fun fact or two!

The 'Men of The zodiac' episode was hilarious so after many requests - both on the Patreon and in Instagram DM's, we now have an episode (lovingly) dragging the women of all 12 zodiac signs.

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Is your horniness hindering you? Do you find yourself making more excuses for him because of your sexual attraction to him? Are you giving away so much of yourself and still not getting what you want from him? It may be time to talk about sexual discipline...

In this episode, join Chidera as she discusses better ways to manage your sexual urges without losing yourself, as well as why it's sometimes important to revoke access to the pussy, even if the pussy still wants to play!

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

This episode was voted for by my patrons over on my Patreon!

Does misandry hold the same weight as misogyny? Are men trying hard enough? Are women ever going to be free from patriarchy?

In this episode, The Slumflower discusses why anger is vital for liberation, how being too compassionate towards men is keeping us stuck, and why it matters to have outlets to release your rage.

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Where do you draw the line of financially supporting a man you care about? Are men more likely to take advantage of generous women? What happens if that man can't pay you back?

In this episode, join Chidera as she discusses the slippery slope of borrowing money to men...whilst being in a sexual relationship with the man you're financially supporting!

Are there exceptional scenarios? Or should we just leave men to fix their own financial problems?

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

This episode was voted for by my patrons over on my Patreon!

In the longest episode so far, join The Slumflower as she talks about raising your self-esteem, through the lens of observing rejection sensitivity, desperation, and comparing yourself to women who are in relationships you idolise.

Do men target women who they detect have low self-esteem? Is it too late to raise your self-esteem and date better? Does a woman need to be stupendously beautiful for a man to desire and respect her?

It all goes down in this episode - hilariously and as usual, impactfully!

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

In this episode, join Chidera as she discusses: what's the difference between ‘being bought’ and being where your worth feels valued? Do you feel comfortable asking men for things or are you scared they will think you're 'fleecing' them? What makes a man worth being the 'right' man for you?

Sometimes, you might not even by asking for too much...sometimes, he's just the wrong man!

Join my patreon at patreon.com/theslumflower for access to more revealing episodes, a 65-page guide on whether to keep or leave that guy, as well as answering your dilemma questions!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

You waited patiently and it's finally happening...THE SLUMFLOWER HOUR IS NOW ON PATREON!

Over at my Patreon page, you can enjoy the following benefits:

• BONUS MINISODES: 2 x Monthly Exclusive Mini-sodes (15-minute video bites)
• EXCLUSIVE WORKSHOP SERIES: access to the full video workshop series
• DIGITAL DOWNLOADS: access all worksheets and resource downloads including the BRAND NEW DILEMMA MANUAL - A quick guide to decide on whether to keep or leave that guy!
• EPISODES FROM THE VAULT: access the archive of unseen full-length podcast episodes
• LIVE RECORDINGS: stream exclusive audio from past live show recordings
• VOTING POWER: help pick which topics I should cover on the podcast
• MEMBERS ONLY GROUP CHAT: private member's community where you can chat amongst yourselves and share resources on how to better survive patriarchy
• FREE EBOOK: free download of The New Patriarchy’s Worst Nightmare, Volume 2: The E-Book (Ahead of its January 2024 public release, £10)

I look forward to seeing you on the other side. Come join me!

patreon.com/theslumflower

Are men trustworthy? Are there times when it's okay for a man to lie to you? Are you too honest with men?

In a rather hilarious episode, Chidera unpacks the reality that the man you love will at some point, lie to you - and how we can make peace with the insincerity of men, whilst also accommodating the layers of nuance and reasoning as to why a man might lie; plus how we can benefit from catching him in said lie...depending on how damaging the lie is!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Is a straight relationship devoid of love if the woman employs critical thought and strategy in how she shows up in the partnership? Can love and money co-exist? Has this generation missed out on what 'real love' truly means?

In this episode, The Slumflower muses on the most common rebuttal she gets from women: 'but what about love?'

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Are you flimsy with your boundaries? Are you too forgiving of men? Do you find yourself being too agreeable and malleable?

In this episode, Chidera discusses the idea of creating penalties when men hurt your feelings yet automatically expect forgiveness, why your boundaries might not be working, and what you can do to be stern while still maintaining your sweetness.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

When is considered 'too soon' to sleep with a guy? Do men value it when you tell them 'I don't usually do this'? Are your sexual impulses sabotaging you?

In this hilarious and anecdotal episode, Chidera discusses how a one-night-stand became a 3-week-bender, and what she learnt from the pursuit of instant gratification. We also touch on the controversy of sending nudes to men, and whether your power as a woman can still be redeemable after sleeping with a guy pretty early on into knowing him - especially if after the intimate exchange, you've noticed a change in his behaviour towards you.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Would you rather settle or compromise? Have you explored the difference between settling and compromising? Are you his dream girl or are you his intermediary space-filler while he uses you to get good enough for his dream girl?

In this episode, join Chidera as she discusses why compromise isn't as bad as we think it is - and the ways men compromise in their partnerships with women too. We also touch on many women conflating compromise with settling, and why identifying that distinction could save you years of heartache and under-satisfaction.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Are you addicted to dating apps? Has your pursuit for love become so persistent that you are willing to just accept whoever comes into your life? Are you dampening your ambitions to satisfy the man you're dating?

In this episode, The Slumflower muses on the mistakes we make when we sell ourselves short in the hopes of fast-tracking a romantic connection. We also discuss whether long-distance relationships are a good idea, and why many women develop depression from a failing relationship.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Is sex different with celebrity men vs regular men? Are the women who think they’re better than sex workers aware they’re casually giving men free access to the same sex other women benefit from? Do men deserve bareback privileges?

In this episode, The Slumflower talks about holding out vs giving in, being more likely to slip into 'friends with benefits' scenarios because you are driven by your sexual urges, as well as the issue of sending men nudes...

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Is the 'talking stage' even a real thing or is that man securing you as his placeholder? Do we need better boundaries with men who we are granting the chance to get to know us? Should we be making men work harder for our phone numbers?

In this episode, join Chidera as she troubleshoots the 'talking stage' and debunks the common male hesitancy to be more affirmative and enthusiastic in their pursuit of you, while she visits the various ways men use the 'talking stage' as a way to buy themselves more of your time that they are wasting.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Should we be more 'unrealistic' in our desires and demands of men? Are we benefiting from holding back on giving men a taste of their own medicine? Does our definition of 'savage' need to change?

In this episode, Chidera discusses why it matters to match a man's arrogance, why you need to stop explaining yourself to men and why it's important to hold space for the things you don't find attractive about him - no matter how much you fancy him, as a means of staying grounded without becoming grandiose in your attraction to him.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Is it always a compliment when a man is obsessed with you? Should women be striving more for devotion in men they date? Does a man being obsessed with you mean he will meet your needs?

In this episode, The Slumflower shares stories of men she's had to block due to obsession, along with a discussion on what makes obsession and devotion different - even though women seem to conflate the two concepts.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Are men right when they say women are 'too emotional'? Do we give our power away by crying in front of men about their actions? Should we be more strategic in how we present our sensitivity?

In this episode, join The Slumflower as she covers the conundrum of feeling stupid after over-reacting, learning to communicate your feelings to men without gaslighting yourself/downplaying what you truly want to say, leaving the comfort zone of over-sharing your emotions with guys, and resisting the urge to share subliminal social media posts when you're feeling triggered.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

If you are an older woman who is dating a significantly younger man, have you explored the possibility that he may have a mommy kink? Are you a light-skinned woman dating a dark-skinned Black man? Have you considered the possibility that he might be anti-Black if all his dating history is mixed race/white women? Or maybe you might be a fat woman on the dating scene - have you ever considered that you deserve to leverage your uniqueness even further?

In this episode, join The Slumflower as she visits the various ways men fetishise women - and ways that women can make that same fetishisation work in their favour if they so wish.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Do you find yourself trying to be strong when ignoring men back, only to find yourself caving and giving into your urges to hear from him? Do you feel bad about mirroring a man's energy? Do you have a scarcity mindset with men and dating?

In this episode, Chidera discusses the importance of having an emotional anchor to refer to when you start to ‘forget’ why you’re upset with that man, learning how to use pain as a focal point to guide your behaviour when interacting with a guy, and allowing yourself to experience dating hot guys, broke guys, popular guys and other iterations of men who can't do anything substantial for you - in order to rid yourself of the FOMO and curiosity and in turn, have a more focused outlook when dating with your future in mind.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Is it really a good thing when a guy comes back? Are you his emotional crutch? Did someone else reject him and as a result, he’s come to seek comfort in you?

In this episode, Chidera discusses why you probably should keep him on ice and stand your ground, why you need to start demanding reparations from repeat apologists, believing more in your sauce as the woman he's suddenly returned to, and making him work to earn the same spot in your life that he once took for granted. This is your world and the rules are yours to create and shape as you go along.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Ever been with a Gemini man and wondered why he's like 'that'? Or have you dated a Scorpio man and haven't been able to understand why they do that obsessed-nonchalant thing? Maybe you've been with a Virgo man and you ended up leaving the relationship with insecurities you never even had to begin with...either way, you'll really enjoy this episode.

From Aries through to Pisces, Chidera drags all the men of the zodiac signs - touching on reasons they're most likely to cheat, what makes them insufferable and how to catch them slipping!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Do you find yourself feeling like that man is trying to compete with you? Is his desire to be right more important than his desire to treat you right? Do you feel like you need to minimise your accomplishments and wins in front of him, as a means of avoiding making him feel small?

If you answered 'yes' to at least one of these, this episode is especially for you! During this thought stream, Chidera touches on the cunning and often overlooked ways that insecure men jealously chip away at your self esteem to make themselves feel like they're better than you.

Whether he's a silent story-watcher, or a sudden 'Mr Unbothered' who was flirting with you the week before, there's something to take away from this episode to hopefully equip yourself with the awareness to spot men like this early on...

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Is making the first move with a man desperate...or decisive? Are there exceptions where making the first move might be a good idea? Is the feminist idea of equality through moving to men, serving us or sabotaging us?

In this episode, The Slumflower visits moments where she's made the first move - including times when it has and hasn't worked! She also discusses non-desperate ways to make the first move whilst retaining your position as the goddess whose trust deserves to be delightfully earned.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Are you 'manifesting' the man of your dreams or are you too hyper-fixated on the prospect of a man loving you? Are you really returning to church to seek closeness with the Lord or are you looking for a man? Have you found yourself so deep in the rabbit hole of obsession, that you're paying tarot readers and astrologers to confirm your bias that he likes you back?

In this episode, Chidera talks about how digitised spirituality has enabled us into a mindset of using 'magic' to call regular-ass men into our lives, the danger of being so attached to the idea of finding love that you forget to dream beyond meeting a man, and the reality that if you have to 'manifest' him, you're probably already obsessed with him...

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Are you prioritising values in dating that aren't productive to you? Are you attracting low effort men who are drawn to your low self esteem? Is your fixation on morality keeping you stuck within the realm of dating men who are dull and unimpressive?

In this episode, The Slumflower discusses donating pussy to needy men out of fear to be seen as a bad person, separating yourself from maliciously imposed values coming from family and religion, and the danger of dating to marry.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Why is the word 'friendzone' such a loaded term? How did we arrive at a place where men have successfully managed to push the 'friends with benefits' propaganda whilst they largely remain the only people who actually benefit from this mutual agreement? Are we deluding ourselves by letting the homies hit, in the hopes that they will treat us better than men we barely know?

In this episode, Chidera dissertates on why she believes stingy men should be fast-tracked to the friendzone, ways women can tangibly benefit from a 'friends with benefits' setup and why good-looking men deserve to be treated just like regular-looking men.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Why do we make exceptions and excuses for men yet, we penalise our female friends for similar offences? What happens when we enmesh our personalities with the men we are dating and in effect, we neglect our friendships with the women in our lives? Why do we leap at the idea of moving countries to strengthen a long-distance relationship with a man yet, we feel fear to take a risk of that size for our own selves?

In this episode, Chidera discusses the complexity of showing up for friends who complain about their boyfriends and still stay, losing yourself in your partnerships with men, and why we have placed so much emphasis on being picked by men, that we have forgotten how to be in community with women.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Are you really following your gut...or are you being led by your impulses? Does your pursuit of love compel you to operate from a place of FOMO and as a result, you keep finding yourself in situations you have to emotionally recover from? Is your romantic search for dopamine leading you to disappointment?

In this short and sweet episode of The Slumflower Hour, Chidera discusses her relationship with rejection-sensitivity, the mistake we sometimes make of conflating a connection with compatibility, and learning to use your impulses to your advantage - as opposed to always giving into urges you haven't confronted.

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Does being a people pleaser put you in a position where you're more likely to encounter financially and emotionally manipulative men? Are we conflating kindness with codependency? What do we gain from putting men's sexual needs above our own? Why are people accepting 'nap/shower dates' from men?

In this episode, Chidera visits her past as a former 'pick me' (aka desperate dater), the pitfalls of financially sponsoring men who will spend your money on other women, signing legally-binding documents with crooked men, letting men use your car/address to do shady shit, referring to yourself as a 'easy down-ass chick' when really, you're scared men won't pick you...

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Get the Patriarchy's Worst Nightmare hoodie here: https://patriarchysworstnightmare.com/collections/garms/products/their-worst-nightmare

Why do we even seek closure after a relationship has ended? Is it to find peace in a resolved answer? Are we secretly looking for one last opportunity to re-connect? Does ending a relationship on friendly/open-ended terms give us closure?

In this week's episode, The Slumflower discusses why the pursuit of closure could be linked to the desire to feel a sense of control - and why this usually comes from not wanting to confront feelings of rejection and idleness. Do we give our power away when we entertain our own delusions of what it means when an ex returns out of the blue? 

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Do his compliments feel forced? Do you find yourself clinging onto minor moments and over-analyzed texts, to justify to yourself that he 'does' like you? Is he in competition with you? If you resonated with any of these questions, it might be time to leave that man. For some of us, walking away feels too scary to fathom, but the best way to start is to compile a list of pros and cons, starting with reasons to leave vs reasons to stay!

Join Chidera, as she goes through a comprehensive list of reasons to leave that man - and why you must trust in that decision if it feels right for you!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Is that man gassing you up to disarm you, only to slowly start pulling away and giving you less? In this episode, The Slumflower discusses why you might need to pause on dating men if you're a pushover, and whether looks are a good enough reason to give a guy a chance to date you. Are visually-appealing relationships becoming the new content farms for influencers who have something to prove? Is posting your boyfriend bad luck for the relationship? Are men even worth publicly claiming anymore?

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

Trying to figure out if the guy you're currently seeing is just for a season? In this episode, Chidera dissertates on the difference between a 'Mr Right' and a 'Mr Right Now'. 

Does it feel like you conveniently have a lot in common with your guy but for some reason, something still feels off? Or is there a compatibility even though you both maintain your unique individualism? Do you feel conditionally desired by him? Or are you confident in his attraction to you? By the end of this episode, you'll be able to figure out if he's a keeper or a leaver!

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!

In this hilarious episode, join Chidera as she ponders on encountering patriarchy when dating: are men ever worth neglecting your non-negotiables for? Do you even have non-negotiables for men you prefer to date and if not, why are you scared? Why are there men who love women that know what they like, until what that woman likes is money, or something else he cannot falsely present? What happens if we accept that all relationships are somewhat transactional? Will we then, be able to approach the conversation of negotiation as an important element of partnering with men?

Pre-order my new book POCKET POWER FROM THE SLUMFLOWER here: https://geni.us/pocketpower (Out November 2023)!