Complex PTSD Recovery: We Are Traumatized Motherfuckers

"Just feel good about your authentic self and don't let anyone wreck your recognition of specialness." Right. Let's talk about what may be holding us back from achieving this safe, centered, self-supportive, resilience-boosting psychological station, and the easiest way to achieve the "healthy self" that's never been otherwise defined. Adaptive Narcissism. Plus, we'll be discussing how AN relates to VN and GN; reiterating the truth that going small with your self is not the answer to trauma recovery.

Why is the decision to sacrifice or save our brains so difficult to make? Let's talk about subconscious narratives we probably all carry, the ambivalence-guilt connection, and the power of perception on caregiving burden.

• Find the transcript at t-mfrs.com

• Looking for the 9 full episodes on this topic? Hit up the Filial Obligation Collection on patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers.

• Need some FilOb support? There's a group coming for that dontchaknow. Stay tuned.

Cheers FCKRS.

A big 'nouncement; so long TMFRS! Then let's talk about what constitutes a VulNarc versus "a person with CPTSD." Where does the chronic manipulation come from? How are recovery resources used for trauma-unhealing? What's up with the hostility and antagonism?

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Lots to cover in this mashup of "time, space, and energy" meets "VulNarcs" and "trauma-selves."

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For even more detail, check the newly updated Narc Collection at Patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers

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And thank you again for the past 4 years of gettin nerdy together. See you in the next evolution.

🙏❤️🍻

We're tying up loose ends in our discussion of relationships! Today, discussing the cognitive copy-pastes we accidentally carry out between past and present relationships - and they ways they set us back in our recovery goals while creating abusive dynamics.

Need more thoughts about transference in all its forms? I've got another hour of material and an animated vid on this one. Check patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers for more help, or go to t-mfrs.com to get your pubpod transcripts and learn more about the project.

Cheers y'all!

Back to NonViolent Communication! Here are 10 things the experts say destroy our attempts at vulnerable disclosures and requests. Just in time for the holidays, let's talk about why these conversational reactions burn our t-brains and why people are programmed to use them, anyways.

For the full transcript and all the doods, check t-mfrs.com and get ready to peruse for hours.

To jump into the full-length conversations and deep dives, head over to patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers. And help support this project's continuation while you're there!

Ever feel like you've got a whole household of people contained in one skull? Fighting, just like they did in your family home? Turns out, that's normal. 

Today, let's talk about Internal Family Systems and the roles cemented in your brain. Protectors, Exiles, Distractors, and their vicious cycles that leave us feeling out of control of our own noggins. Plus, how to work with them, instead of hosting raging battles inside forever.

Looking for more deets or just want to help support this solo-DIY project? It's much needed and appreciated. Hit up patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers to keep the knowledge spreading through diverse social systems. 

Check t-mfrs.com for more info on the whole community healing project.

🍻 Cheers y'all

Jess

Let's talk about the opposition we face during trauma recovery - namely, from our social contacts who aren't ready to have their own histories and perspectives pulled into focus. And, let's discuss the reason why the battle is worth all the effort.

Don't give up, brave Motherfucker. Remember that what you're doing matters. For everyone. ✊

Related eps: perspective series, filial obligaton series, brain programming series, family hijinx series, NC eps, refind yer Self series, inner and outer work series

So we do this painful and energetically expensive inner work. And then what? Return to the same old lives? Naw, Fucker. That's the fastest way to hit "revert to draft." Once the integrative inner work starts, the outer labor has to keep up. 

Let's talk about supporting our brain changes by building new lives, to enable further cognitive evolution as we keep stepping. 

Related eps: inner and outer work series, refind & empower yer Self series, re-association eps, confronting common human fears ep, early season motivation eps

Aiming for recovery, but finding that you never have the conditions to make progress?

Let's talk about what it takes for a brain to heal. The basic mediums of life that most of us are unable to access in our traumatized society. 

Related eps: time distortion series, "rat cage" societal trauma series, inner and outer work series, refind yer Self series

A brain is busy with all those survival processes running in the background and the second-by-second management of triggers and symptoms. So what happens when that system gets overloaded?

Today, we're talking about the pattern of symptom masking/ignorance, overcompensation, loss of functionality, and eventual collapse. And how does "resilience vs. resistance" change our perspective?

Related eps: brain operations series, perspective series, inner and outer work series

Back to this self-limiting conversation... what happens when our "selves" are limited by incohesion? When we have inner wars over "the right thing," or oppositional memory and emotional responses confusing every issue?

Let's talk about the battle that rages inside. Revisiting "parts" and how they're the crux of pulling your shit together for long-lasting recovery. 

Related eps: fragmentation series, DID series, find and empower yer Self series, inner and outer work series, derealization and depersonalization eps

You've decided to enact new behaviors to change your life... only to find you can't actually put them into practice. You stall out and revert to old programs to your own bewilderment. Something is stalling progress from the inside.

Let's talk about self-limiting strategies for living spawned by trauma. And the ways they become "default modes" of daily existence. 

Related eps: self-limitation series, the cages we create ourselves, refind yer Self series, inner & outer work series

Ready to retrain your brain and behaviors? Talked a lot about these topics, and highly recommend diving deeper for reflection. Hit patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers for the full series on this subject. 

So we all have a penchant for fear, it's a foundational aspect of PTSD. But what happens when our brain relay system is wonky due to those adaptations? 

Let's talk about the faulty DMN. How it throws us into disjointed memories, disables continuous autobiographical recall, explains poor sense of somatic (bodily) self, and interacts with those pesky sub-sensory threshold fear triggers. Reflect on this one, it'll explain a lot.

Related eps: DMN ep, entrapment series, developmental biology and disassociation eps across seasons

We know, trauma brains create patterns that can stall us out and keep us stuck. This is especially true when talking "relationships" of all forms. Unfortunately, leading many to feel permanently socially-tethered, personally incapable, and suicidal, instead.

Today, let's talk about how relationships often corrupt our lives, how to re-work them, and when it's time to say goodbye - all for recovery's sake. 

Related eps: relationship obligation series, covert abuse series, brain patterning series, filial obligaton series, self-limitation series

The time comes for all of us; the family call to duty. And then what. We know it's going to trigger unwanted trauma reactions. But resisting often feels futile, immoral, and socially-punishing.

Let's talk about the dangers of family re-immersion for a healing trauma brain and what we can do to protect ourselves before the filial phonecalls start. 

Related eps: filial obligation and entrapment series, family brain hijinx series, fawning series, brain operations series, social psychology ep

Perspective; A word with many meanings, depending on who's speaking it. Namely, the bane of, "that's just ONE perspective."

Let's talk about the real definition of the word, how it pertains to post-traumatic stress development, where attention vs. willful ignorance comes into play, and how no one can ever have your irreplicable perspective. Trust your guts, Fuckers. You know where you've been. 

Related eps: perspective series, time distortions series, covert abuse series, family brain hijinx series

Have you been struggling to make meaningful progress? Well, these global events don't help. Especially when they feel so... family-iar... to our trauma brains. 

Let's talk about the semi-accepted phases of trauma recovery - destabilization, processing, and integration. And how societal systems keep bringing us back to square one.

Related eps: "the rat cage" societal trauma series, refind yer Self series, inner work series