Skip to main content
Crash Dummies Podcast with Pat and Mike

Crash Dummies Podcast with Pat and Mike

By Crash Dummies
Patrick Johnson and Michael Esiobu dive into current events and scenarios that probably will never happen.
Listen on
Where to listen
Apple Podcasts Logo

Apple Podcasts

Breaker Logo

Breaker

Google Podcasts Logo

Google Podcasts

Pocket Casts Logo

Pocket Casts

RadioPublic Logo

RadioPublic

Spotify Logo

Spotify

The Bachelor Has To End - Episode 18
Where to follow us and subscribe: www.crashdummiespodcast.com Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - Intro 3:26 - Would you rather? 7:35 - We were in a play 14:56 - Jon Gruden 25:40 - Would you rather? 27:21 - Merch coming soon! 28:43 - Overrated/Underrated/Accurate 37:51 - The Bachelor has to end 46:35 - Mike went to Culvers 49:52 - Would you rather? 52:28 - “You” Season 3 (No spoilers) 57:33 - Which came first? 1:01:15 - Do you close the door? 1:04:21 - Grocery Carrying? 1:08:29 - Would you rather? 1:11:48 - Hypothetical question 1:14:08 - Would you rather? 1:18:05 - Hooters 1:28:40 - WNBA 1:32:39 - Outro
01:34:38
October 20, 2021
Viva Viagra - Episode 17
Where to follow us and subscribe: www.crashdummiespodcast.com Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - Intro 1:27 - Fury vs Wilder 12:10 - Dave Chappelle 19:40 - Have you watched this? 21:54 - Spooky Season 25:35 - Would you Rather? 29:54 - Facebook is down 34:40 - The Rock is a rapper? 39:14 - Would you rather? 42:39 - Relatable 50:36 - You met who? 54:14 - He’s pregnant?? 57:42 - Mike is stupid 58: 55 - Tis the season 1:02:30 - Different perspectives 1:05:14 - Drake & Chris Brown sued 1:07:49 - Hangry 1:10:12 - Commercial Comedy 1:18:10 - Would you rather 1:21:57 - Outro
01:23:49
October 13, 2021
YikYak and The McRib Are Back! - Episode 16
Where to follow us and subscribe: www.crashdummiespodcast.com Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - Intro 3:30 - Urban Meyer 7:53 - Squid Games 15:10 - Lil Baby 16:49 - Give me my money back 19:14 - Roll the dice 22:25 - Powerball Numbers 24:20 - Plane crash 26:50 - Yik Yak 34:23 - Devious Acts 36:56 - McRib is back 38:30 - Spooky season 44:19 - Walmart vs Target 49:00 - Vaccinated 1:03:18 - Superpowers 1:06:11 - Scalp Lickers 1:07:44 - Wanna get taller? 1:10:08 - Dress up 1:12:20 - Friend Zoned 1:20:00 - Outro
01:19:47
October 6, 2021
You Going To Jail Now - Episode 15
Where to follow us and subscribe: www.crashdummiespodcast.com Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - Intro 3:57 - Orcas and Sea Lions 6:11 - Gabby Petito 12:13 - Cancel Him 15:25 - Fish McMuffin 19:58 - American Eating 24:03 - Prison Time for Money 27:33 - Dumb Crimes 28:45 - Kanye West Following People 32:39 - Unwritten Rules 41:09 - Girl Lyrics 42:36 - WYR: Snakes and Bulls 48:16 - This We Watched As Kids 52:36 - Mike’s Story 54:50 - Being Famous For The Wrong Thing 01:03:29 - Pranks 01:06:12 - The Rock 01:08:46 - Drake Vs Michael Jackson 01:16:16 - Singing Into a Fan 01:18:07 - WYR: Jaw or Ankle 01:19:06 - New iPhone 01:22:10 - The View 01:25:41- Outro
01:27:18
September 29, 2021
Whose Kid is This? - Episode 14
Where to buy "Thanks For The Ride": https://www.amazon.com/Thanks-Ride-Comedic-Short-Stories/dp/1098389298 Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - Intro 4:11 - Lost Kid 9:18 - Smart Kids 12:22 - Parents are liars 13:43 - NBA Old Heads 18:51 - Time to Read 20:34 - WYR (War Time) 25:53 - Youngboy vs Nick Cannon 29:55 - Celebrity Parents 34:37 - Emoji Facts 40:35 - Racing 90 Year Olds 42:07 - Alien Encounter 49:00 - Judging Your Shopping Carts 51:11 - Walking Down a Long Hallway 56:47 - Reddit WYR 59:52 - School Days 1:01:00 - Wedding Pics 1:02:41 - Mandela Effect 1:06:20 - Voice Acting 1:08:26 - Outro
01:09:22
September 22, 2021
The Things We’d Do For The Dollar - Episode 13
Where to buy "Thanks For The Ride": https://www.amazon.com/Thanks-Ride-Comedic-Short-Stories/dp/1098389298 Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - intro 3:23 - 9/11 7:59 - Time to Read 9:42 - Family Reunion 11:07 - Fashion week 15:10 - WYR? 16:15 - Mike’s Story 21:30 - Sexy Maid 23:56 - Drivers Ed 29:49 - WYR? 30:52 - Door Man 32:08 - Coupons 35:03 - Super Cat 37:12 - Goats 42:42 - Top Chef 46:21 - Click Bait 49:14 - WYR? 51:13 - In da club 53:55 - WYR? 55:53 - Bees n Bears 59:26 - Library 1:02:05 - Bedtime 1:05:12 - WYR? 1:07:08 - WYR? 1:08:16 - Dinner with Jay Z 1:16:12 - Outro
01:20:08
September 15, 2021
Kanye, Drake, and Kangaroos - Episode 12
Donate to help fight childhood cancer  https://bitly.com/KidsFightCancer Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - Intro 4:44 - CLB 13:36 - WYR? 16:58 - Fight Cancer 18:42 - Devil On My Shoulder 23:37 - Teachers Crying 30:57 - Heaven or Hell? 34:15 - Annoying Girlfriend 37:09 - Car Trouble 41:19 - Dreaming 49:12 - Kangaroo Time 53:10 - NBA Dodgeball 56:12 - Civilians 59:00 - Buy My Clothes 1:02:00 - Biological Child 1:06:47 - WYR? 1:09:23 - Magic Johnson 1:13:00 - Inner Thoughts 1:16:14 - Caller 1:22:00 - Bishop Sycamore 1:29:16 - Outro
01:33:05
September 8, 2021
Tender Touch - Episode 11
Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies  0:00 - Intro 4:48 - Donda 16:45 - Jake Paul 20:00 - WYR? 23:33 - Pat’s Story 24:50 - Party Time 31:04 - Wet Tissue 34:01 - Random Couple 37:35 - Addict 39:48 - Tender Touch 43:20 - Kidnapped? 44:27 - HotDogs 46:13 - 9th Place 52:00 - Reddit Group 54:46 - 100 million or your arm 56:58 - Too Much Ice 1:04:53 - Proposal 1:07:30 - Characteristics 1:10:05 - WYR? 1:12:53 - Outro
01:19:41
September 1, 2021
The Milk Man - Episode 10
Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - Intro 4:06 - Crate Challenge 10:53 - Asking questions in front of the class 12:48 - Rappers got stop 13:50 - Screaming at concerts 17:45 - Dating apps 22:05 - Pj Washington 28:32 - Kardashians control everything 30:20 - Kylie stealing designs? 32:53 - Trump gets booed 34:36 - Guys face timing 36:17 - Girls calling about nothing 38:12 - You can’t pause an online game 41:00 - Chicago Rappers throwing a baseball 43:03 - Chasity belt 44:35 - Would you rather 48:35 - Would you rather 52:08 - Would you rather 55:08 - Would you rather 56:04 - Update on sperm group 59:02 - Onlyfans is done 1:04:15 - Outro
01:05:31
August 25, 2021
Late Nights - Episode 9
Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies  0:00 - Intro 3:38 - Ray Lewis 8:04 - Vaccines talk 13:17 - Crazy dm 15:00 - Would you rather 18:43 - Would you rather 21:58 - Sperm donor 28:56 - Grape flavor 30:47 - Impossible Meat 34:32 - Would our kids use social media? 40:13 - Change a body sound 42:26 - Frozen hands 44:39 - Our haters 47:28 - Stand up comedy 51:45 - Wake up/ Old heads 53:47 - Zillow 56:12 - Counting pennies 58:08 - Black people and microwaves 59:55 - Random conversation 1:02:42 - Would you rather 1:03:53 - Would you rather 1:04:18 - Batman sucks 1:10:50: -Outro
01:13:56
August 18, 2021
Cancel Everyone - Episode 8
Get 20% OFF @manscaped + Free Shipping with promo code "CRASHDUMMIES" at MANSCAPED.com! Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 - Intro 2:28 - Da baby Canceled? 9:08 - Manscaped 12:07 - 6ix9ine interview 20:26 - Would Pat snitch on Mike? 21:55 - Suitcase full of money 23:55 -Have you ever screamed? 27::00 - Are politicians the new sports teams? 32:21 - Is Kanye waiting for Drake? 37:04 - German Coach punches a horse 41:25 - Girls being impressed 46:37 - Cougar Love 48:13 - What would we do for a million dollars 54:20 - would you rather? 55:48 - Forgetting deodorant 57:39 - Look at us 58:30 - How to survive a zombie apocalypse 1:04:21 - Netflix shows we hate and love 1:04:46 - Outer Banks rant 1:08:34 - All American rant 1:11:01 - More Netflix show rants 1:13:55 - Our shortest relationships 1:17:05 - Our corniest moments 1:20:41 - Water cups 1:21:30 - Bill Cosby stand up? 1:26:43 - Memphis rappers 1:29:02 - Fight to the death 1:34:08 - Outro
01:36:16
August 11, 2021
Bidet Chronicles - Episode 7
Get 20% OFF @manscaped + Free Shipping with promo code "CRASHDUMMIES" at MANSCAPED.com! Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 Intro 3:38 Rating Restaurants 27:42 Building on fire scenario 29:22 Simone Biles 37:49 Kyrie vs Nike 43:14 Aaron Rodgers 48:01 Would you rather  50:55 If you had 1M 53:01 Someone offers you this deal 56:04 Kelly Clarkston /Dr.Dre 1:03:41 Ashton Kutcher 1:10:12 Mike Story 1:20:48 How do you count 1:23:17 Would you rather 1:25:53 Plunger 1:28:18 Bidet Chronicles 1:33:03 Would you rather 1:39:09 Handshake 1:43:30 Da baby 1:49:04 Donkey vs Giraffe 1:51:38 Outro
01:56:46
August 4, 2021
Pat vs Africa - Episode 6
Get 20% OFF @manscaped + Free Shipping with promo code "CRASHDUMMIES" at MANSCAPED.com!    Join Our Patreon For Exclusive Content: https://www.patreon.com/crashdummies 0:00 Intro 2:07 Bucks in 6 7:20 Kanye did what? 13:08 Ad 16:00 Top 5 Rappers 20:00 Two Free things 24:36 Emotionally Scarred 27:46 Runaway child 31:03 Cock Fighting  36:07 Guardians?? 39:27 (picture of Arab mascot) 40:33 Jeff Bezos in space 41:05 (picture of rocket) 45:10 He got fired for what? 47:43 Bad Therapist 48:38 Would you rather… 54:20 Near Death Experience  56:51 Speak Better 59:47 Kardashian Curse 1:01:26 Olympics 1:08:24 Tik Tok Story 1:10:12 R. Kelly 1:12:40 Back to School 1:17:19 would you rather… 1:21:54 What’s her name? 1:26:26 Outro
01:30:50
July 28, 2021
Goat Head - Episode 5
Get 20% OFF @manscaped + Free Shipping with promo code "CRASHDUMMIES" at MANSCAPED.com! 0:00 - intro 3:52 - You ever been jumped before? 11:47 - XXL Freestyle 15:54 - Baby Hitler 19:34 - Nigeria vs USA 24:37 - Chrissy Tiegen Canceled 33:07 - Celebrity Break Ins 38:26 - Ad 41:18 -Toilet Snake 44:21 - Space Jam 2 48:05 - Qdoba vs Chipotle 51:08 - 2021 prediction 57:47 - Statistical Liar 1:08:10 - Would you rather? 1:31:03 - Lamar vs Tristan 1:34:32 - Outro 
01:38:29
July 21, 2021
Wheaties - Episode 4
0:00 - Intro 1:30 - Nigerian Boarding School 9:26 - What happens when you die? 17:00 - Scammed a scammer 25:08 - Athletes vs the world 40:46 - We are officially myth busters? 45:25 - How bad can Mike mess this up?  58:17 - This should be banned in America 1:07:00 - Would you rather. 1:12:25 - A personal thank you  
01:14:23
July 14, 2021
Back Then - Episode 3
The guys look back on their childhood and things spiral out of control. They also dive into some recent news, including the Sha'carri Richardson story, which has shocked the country. And of course the fan favorite “Would you Rather” questions.
01:08:33
July 7, 2021
The Seed - Episode 2
On this episode the guys discuss Nick Cannon’s baby names, Tristan Thompson’s cheating allegations, NBA players we could beat in 1v1 and the fan favorite “Would you Rather” questions.
01:04:19
June 30, 2021
The Pilot - Episode 1
In this episode Pat and Mike discuss new music that came out, the past UFC events, the Madden cover, and many more sports topics. They also discuss the entertainment boxing industry and a few “would you rather” questions which led to total chaos.
54:48
June 26, 2021