Cultivating Goodness

If you’re back to doing something you promised you’d stay away from, here are a few points to help you in your effort to try again.

1. Set yourself up for success (2:37)
2. Focus your attention elsewhere (4:46)
3. Surround yourself with those on a similar mission (6:38)

Read the blog post here. For more resources, check out...

It is natural to want good friends, but relationships are two-sided. If you want good friends, you have to be a good friend.

1. Choose carefully (0:55)
2. Be faithful (2:55)
3. Build on honesty (4:43)
4. Connect emotionally (6:24)

If you feel buried, crushed by the hardships of life, join Elise and me for this conversation on how such a state is actually the prelude to much success. An arrow has to be pulled back in order to be shot forward. Let's take a look at where suffering takes us.

Loving someone is a pursuit each of us undertakes at some point, to the extent that the sincerity of our feelings can be hard to discern.

• You look for them in a crowded room (1:10)
• You want to be with them (2:32)
• They are home to you (3:58)
• You know just how messed up they are (5:47)
• You let them know just how messed up you are (7:44)
• You genuinely desire to serve them (10:47)
• You can’t hate them for breaking your heart (12:23)
• You wish nothing but the best for them (14:54)

To anyone who is hyper-aware of their weaknesses, there is more to the story. Yes, you are a fallen and broken individual, but that is how God shines all the more brightly through us. If your self-deprecation/self-awareness see-saw could use some balance, join this conversation where Elise and I discuss how our weaknesses actually bring about strength.

At the end of the day, you can either focus on what tears apart or what holds together. It’s all about perspective.

If you feel like you are falling down a dark pit, don't close the book. There is so much more to your story if you just keep reading. The darkness you are facing is not a final destination you're settling into, but a season you're passing through. As Elise and I discuss in this episode, there is so much glory that can come from the darkness of our stories. Just keep reading.

Did you know the person or circumstance that is driving you up a wall is actually providing incredible insight to your soul?

It's proven quite trendy to unplug from social media, but many times a break can lead to a vicious cycle. To those who are not deleting their accounts, how can you make the most of a social media detox?

Additional Resources:

It can be easy to identify friends, but what differentiates them from one who sticks closer than a brother?

• Prioritizes you (1:07)
• Pushes through hard times with you (4:11)
• Opens up to you (6:17)
• Knows you better than yourself (8:23)
• Doesn’t always agree with you (10:12)
• Doesn’t have to have “fun” (11:55)
• Is unaffected by distance and time (14:35)

The negative side effects of social media are a hot topic in today's digital age, so let's take a step back and look at the bigger picture. There are two sides two this coin: the strengths of social media and the weaknesses we need to guard.

Additional Resources:

Practical ways to alter your surroundings and simultaneously improve your mindset.

1. Eat...well (1:04)
2. Go to sleep (3:30)
3. Get together with friends (4:58)
4. Take a shower (5:31)
5. Rearrange your room (5:59)
6. Go outside (6:36)

Buckle up for this episode as Julia and I dive into relational red flags, advice, and the ultimate purpose of it all. There is no sugar coating here!

• Overprotectiveness (0:47)
• Another "half" (3:01)
• Flipped prioritization (9:16)
• Immaturity (11:10)

Most people will form circles you won’t be involved in, and that’s okay. You don’t need a lot of friends, just a few you can trust.

In this part two episode, Heide and I are tackling the ins and outs of perfectionism.

“For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ, being ready to punish every disobedience, when your obedience is complete.” -2 Corinthians 10:3-6

More resources:

To the one battling heartbreak, loss, anxiety, depression, or any other trial: this is for you, and this is for me.

One of the purest forms of love is found in telling your friends things they don't want to hear. That's what "brutal honesty" is: saying what is hard so growth can occur. True friends care more about their friend's character than their feelings, an idea Julia and I walk through via our personal experiences.

The Holy Spirit is not limited to Christian media, so we can reap biblical truths even if that was not the creator’s intent.

1. God is not limited to Christian media
2. To come alongside nonbelievers
3. To improve our arguments
4. Perchance Christian content is wiped

Links & Resources:

Never regret a relationship. There is always a silver lining and beauty that comes from ashes.

It may seem pointless to take certain classes when you know the direction you're heading in life, but such notions have an interesting counterpoint.

From starting the day to pushing through a tough season, it is important to focus on God. Here are some practical tips and resources.

Practical Steps

• Put your Bible on your pillow (0:53)
• Kneel when reading your Bible (1:13)
• Summarize the passage you are reading (1:49)
• Listen to Scripture or worship music in the car (2:07)

Resources

Worship is not just a Sunday morning thing. We should be worshiping every day of the week, in everything we do. Why? How?

• Expressive vs nonexpressive worship (0:52)
• Worship as a form of prayer (2:14)
• The essence of worship (5:22)
• A little picture of heaven (7:39)
• The need to worship all day, every day (9:25)
• Eliminating distractions during corporate worship (10:36)
• Is your faith an ice cube or ice cube tray? (12:43)
• Memorizing scripture through song (15:52)

Thankfully the answers are not as ambiguous as they may seem, but they do get pretty technical, so think them through. Approach your situation honestly. And guys, don’t let my narrowed audience turn you away. There’s something to learn about future wives here, too!

• He will be a man, not a boy (1:35)
• He will have SOLID character (2:56)
• He will hold God higher (4:18)
• He will actively pursue you (5:42)
• He will maintain boundaries (7:12)
• He will love you for who you are (8:23)
• He will bring peace to your busy mind (9:26)
• He will make you fall more in love with Christ (10:19)
• He won’t be perfect (11:19)
• He will be right for you (13:37)

It's one thing to know facts about God and another to feel their reality, but how does that transition occur? In this conversation, Abbie and I talk about how our prayers for this transfer were answered by unwanted circumstances, but how we needed the darkness of those days to magnify God's glory.

Life is a collection of stopping or continuing. Whether you're being stretched from the inside or out, here's motivation to keep going.

Reunions with long-distance friends can be few and far between, so how do you make the best use of time when you're finally together?

• Make an agenda... (0:47)
• Quality *face* time (1:53)
• Be creative (3:18)
• ...but leave room for spontaneity (4:04)
• Have deep conversations (6:45)
• Keep in touch while you're apart (7:32)
• Don't feel pressured to make memories (10:42)
• Be yourself (12:47)

While we may never know completely why a trial occurs, there are six reasons that play a part. Regardless, we can rest assured that God does not allow pain without a purpose.

1. Character development (0:37)
2. To make good days, good days (4:02)
3. To teach a lesson (4:48)
4. God’s glory shines brighter (6:46)
5. To help others (10:17)
6. Something greater is coming (12:15)

There can be a lot of controversy around makeup. From someone who's given up on makeup, someone who's done a full face of makeup every day for eight years, and someone who's a little in between, let's talk about what's going on.

• Makeup usage according to lifestyle (1:01)
• Identifying with different makeup styles (or lack thereof) (4:44)
• Is makeup a mask? (7:00)
• The definition of beauty (11:50)

Natural eyelash help: https://www.bebeautiful.in/all-things-skin/everyday/how-to-grow-eyelashes#:~:text=Applying%20castor%20oil%20on%20the,wash%20it%20in%20the%20morning

Every person portrays a micro aspect of God. We are His walking poetry, a beauty that ripples out from much deeper than one's external appearance. In this episode, we're unpacking what that looks like.

• What makes a person beautiful (0:25)
• Behind the article (4:13)
• A handful of the beautiful people I know (7:33)

Let's have a candid conversation: breakups hurt...a lot, and it is so easy to become consumed by the following emotions. How do you move on?

• Rest in truths of who God is (4:39)
• Focus on the end goal (7:36)
• Reconnect with your community (10:48)
• Learn & turn from your sin nature (12:29)
• Journal (14:12)
• Read/pray Psalms (16:44)

Everything happens for a reason. While we might not always know completely why, there are good reminders along the way. Like...

1. Death is just a doorway (1:42)
2. Gathering with people is a gift (3:47)
3. Faith isn’t always pretty (6:17)
4. Not everything has to be straight (9:01)
5. God is bigger than the storms in my mind (11:02)

Girls are like flowers: they're all beautiful in their own ways, so how do you determine a hairstyle that is not only flattering but also suits your lifestyle? In this episode, I'm joined by Kylie and Kayle to discuss just that.

Topics include...

• Maintenance (1:22)
• Thick vs thin hair
• Face shapes (3:15)
• Lifestyle
• Layers (6:26)
• Health

Sometimes the world is too heavy for us to bear (and sometimes we take on more than we should), so how do we restart our mentality to be the best version of ourselves? How can we be happy?

#4 - Be Content (2:34)

There can be mixed emotions when seemingly everyone is starting a dating relationship, getting engaged, or getting married...that is, everyone except for you.

This is where my best friend and I found ourselves during our second year of college. We were in the singleness boat with no one special on the horizon. Here's the conversation we were having about how to find contentment.

It is core to human nature to long for a calling bigger than ourselves, but often we identify with the wrong thing. What are we stopping short of? What are we here to do?

Show highlights:

• Back to origin (0:55)
• #1 — Glorify God (2:24)
• #2 — Love others (4:36)
• How to maintain your purpose (10:02)

Links & Resources:

In this episode, I am joined by my friends Kylie and Kayle. I met Kylie in the seventh grade and we ended up in the same major in college where we met Kayle. Of the three of us, Kylie is by far the most experienced with all things hair and makeup, so Kayle and I approached her with our questions.

Topics include...

• How to dress up joggers (1:55)
• Flannels and joggers (2:37)
• Matching flannel sets (3:00)
• Colors that go together (3:20)
• Finding your style through observation (4:26)
• Balancing your outfits (5:49)
• Colors that compliment pale complexions (7:22)
• Dressing according to your undertone (9:30)

In a world full of voices proclaiming you can be whoever you want to be, how are you supposed to know who you are meant to be?

#1 — Hone in on God (2:48)

#2 — Recognize your uniqueness (6:15)

#3 — Plug into your community (9:50)