Ditch The Script

WE LOVE this week's episode! We discuss attachment styles & how to make them work within relationships, we discuss signs of healing & growth vs signs of unresolved wounds, & we chat a lot about sex!

Tune in & let us know what you think!

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Our Golden Bachelor is going to hometowns! This week we see Gerry visit Theresa, Faith, & Leslie’s hometowns to meet their families & see if it’s a match made in heaven. BUT we also spot some unrealistic things popping up  & we are here to call it all out! 

BUT FIRST we give you a very fun update on our lives about travel, boys, being withcy, & so much mre! 

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Welcome back to the Ditch The Script Podcast!

In this episode, we're diving deep into the world of ABC's The Golden Bachelor and unraveling the reality of unhealed insecurities and their impact on our dating and relationship experiences.

But first, we kick off the episode with an open and candid conversation about the genuine challenges and hang-ups we all face when navigating the daunting landscape of modern dating.

From sifting through thousands of potential matches to facing our own vulnerabilities, join us as we explore the very real, raw, and relatable aspects of love, romance, and self-discovery. Tune in for an enlightening and entertaining discussion that might help you rewrite your dating script!

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We are excited to be unpacking ABC's The Golden Bachelor! Does dating & relationships get better with age? Or is it ALL the same? What can we learn from the generations before us on love & relationships? What can we do better than previous generations when it comes to committed monogamous relationships?

We are plugged in & ready to share with you ALL of our insights, curiosities, & things we need to DITCH on this unique season of The Bachelor!

BUT FIRST, we talk about unplugging, being tired, & how to communicate that with friendships & partnerships! We also open up about the different ways we unplug, recharge & reset.

Happy listening & thank you for being here!

In this weeks episode we head back to Seattle for Love Is Blind After The Altar! 

How are our couples doing? We see some AMAZING things that have blossomed between our married couples with Tiffany & Brett, Bliss & Zach, & Chelsea & Kwame. AND we also see a bunch of toxic habits & red flags between some of the past Love Is Blind participants.

Everything from manipulation, guilt tripping, triangulation to weak boundaries, condescending communication, & toxic fighting…. We cover it all in this episode! 

We are wrapping up Love Is Blind Japan this week & are calling out the remaining self sabotaging behaviors that will ALWAYS lead to relationship failure, so that YOU do not make these mistakes in your own love life. Before we get started we jump into some important mindset reframes & tools to be able to take perspective about the situations in your life that aren't 100% where you want them to be!

We're nearing the end of our Love Is Blind: Japan experience! And we're really going to be sad to see it go. As we approach the end of the show, our remaining couples are gearing up for their "I do's" and "I don'ts". We even see a few couples call it before we even get to the weddings, something we don't see as often in the American version of this show. Alex and Bri gush over the healthy communication the couples have while they're navigating breakups. And yes, even the illusive closure is found in these episodes! This is a big deal coming from two professionals in the field who always answer, "no" to the question, "does closure exist?". We really don't believe you are likely to find closure in conversation with your ex...until we saw these LIB Japan couples navigate their breakups! The secret?- tell your new ex what you appreciated about being with them and what you learned about yourself through the experience.

This insight and more in this week's episode of Ditch The Script!

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AYYY! We got a special guest with us today! You may know Xander from Netflix's Ultimatum Queer Love, but we have had the wonderful opportunity to get to know Xander as the human they are & are excited to let you in on the chat we had with them. What lessons did they learn? What were their biggest takeaways from the show? You will hear it ALL in this heart to heart we have with one of the dopest humans we've ever met!

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This week on Love Is Blind Japan episodes 7&8 we see some MAJOR communication break downs & we are here to SPELL EM OUT so that you can see how you can avoid these mistakes in your own relationships! PLUS Bri has some icky news that we are ALL supporting her through.

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Things are starting to get REAL for the Love Is Blind Japan contestants. We are starting to see past wounds creep into their current relationships & sabotage the relationship overnight and we are also seeing some couples come together in the most beautiful way too. Tune in to hear us unpack it ALL!

BUT FIRST, we discuss whether or not sharing a bedroom with your partner is necessary! Does not sharing a bedroom mean your relationship is doomed?

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It’s time for Love Is Blind Japan!!! In this weeks episode we analyze episodes 1 & 2 & BOY O BOY do we see a HUGE difference in how culture shapes the way we initiate & engage in dating! We see many more conscious conversations happening between the participants & we also spot some societal shame around divorce come up quite a bit, which we have a lot to say about! 

But first we jump into anxious attachment styles & how they can show up within relationships as well as how to handle it & what to do! 

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Ditch The Script wraps up The Ultimatum Queer Love with a bang. We talk everything from the final episode engagements (and breakups) and all of the tea from the reunion. We discuss if relationships really require unconditional love, choosing your partner for the future you want, how to set boundaries after a breakup, and signs of narcissistic rage and how to best manage it *finally comes up for air*. Trust us, this is an episode you want to listen to.

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We’re back to unpack another 2 episodes of Netflix’s Ultimatum: Queer Love1 WE ARE LOVING this season in comparison to the OG Ultimatum because of the conscious conversations happening! We see the avoidant anxious dance between partners, communication break downs, & lots of triggers & trauma responses.

And before we jump into ALL of that golden nugget info, we pick up where we left off last week. What is “the right” way to talk about your ex & past experiences with your new partner? 

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Ditch The Script continues our breakdown of the Netflix's The Ultimatum: Queer Love. We catch up with the trial marriage couples in their final days together before moving back in with their "exes". And WOW do we have a lot of feelings about the couples. Topics covered:

-Why you don't want to "one-up" your partner's pain for the sake of "winning" an argument

-What emotional manipulation looks like

- how to break your trauma response cycles and implement that into your relationship

- & the benefit of learning you can be loved differently outside of your toxic partner

Episodes 3 & 4 Of Netflix's The Ultimatum Queer Love, have us calling out red flags left & right BUT we also see a lot of GREEN flags too!!!! This week brought us a lot of communication mishaps & we discuss the MOST TOXIC habit that we see which has unfortunately been normalized quite a bit. It's time we put a stop to this habit that literally destroys relationships of all kinds!

Before we jump into the nitty gritty of all the relationship tea, we discuss societal shame around beauty standards....let's go!

Our first Queer Reality Dating TV Coverage!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhh! We're so excited but... Netflix, we have some notes. Listen to this full episode to get our take on where the popular streaming platform didn't do any favors for us by leaving out the cast's pronouns and hiring a cis-straight host?! Wtf.

Anywho, the red flags are impossible to ignore even from episode one. Take this journey with us as we get to know the couples in the first and second episode of The Ultimatum: Queer Love. Listen to who we think are in a healthy position to be taking the next step toward greater commitment and why. If you have a lot of thoughts on Vanessa and her dynamic with Lexi, Rae, Xander, and literally everyone else... you'll want to join us on this episode. Lexi gives us a play by play on how to spot a player.

Also if you're curious, you can listen to us dish on who we're personally already crushing on. Reminder: Ultimatum's are never appropriate! But harmless flirting is ;)

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Did you miss us?! Last week we had major technical difficulties that rendered the episode we recorded for you unusable. 😭 In this weeks episode, we recap the important items from the previous 2 episodes of Love Is Blind AND unpack the Love Is Blind reunion! We see a HUGE lack of emotional intelligence with some of the individuals + the HOST (yep - we are not above calling out the Lachey's). We also discuss the way to spot your own toxic relationship cycles & explain the steps to put a stop to them!

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If you hang with us every week, leave a rating & review! We sooo appreciate your support!

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This week on Ditch The Script, we cover episodes 9 and 10 of Netflix's Love is Blind Season 4. We are starting to see tensions rise & derail communication within MANY of the couples. BUT for the couples (more like 1 couple) who take the time to validate their partners emotions & get curious, we are seeing secure attachment & true emotional intimacy develop! We also see how certain family & friend dynamics impact the relationships in both good & bad ways....It's a doozy!

But first we talk about this full moon in Scorpio enerrrgyyyy. Has it been heavy for you too?
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Welcome back to the pod! This week on Ditch The Script, we cover episodes 7 and 8 of Netflix's Love is Blind Season 4. This season is turning out to be a masterclass in how to ensure a relationship NEVER works out, and we call it all in this episode. Alex and Brianna note a lot of ways that some of the couples are putting each other down and missing key opportunities to actually open up room for honest conversation to explore their needs. Some of these couples need to be exploring their needs independently... we said what we said! One couple in particular is showing us all the green flags though and this week Alex and Brianna get specific about what can be found in their secret sauce, *cough* validation and emotional regulation *cough cough*

BUT first! We catch up with our hosts to figure out how the girls have spent their weekends and still managing to record a solid af episode for yall, because priorities!!

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This episode of Ditch The Script is a banger. We start with the secrets on how to have the best sex of your life, drumroll please....TALK ABOUT IT! We breakdown the benefit of talking about sex with your partner early and often, how to structure this, and what you can do even if you're not currently seeing someone. We spill a few secrets in this chat as well ;)

We continue on with out Love Island Season 4 coverage where we wrap up the getaways in Mexico and begin to see the couples begin their journey back in their hometown. We note some unintentional gaslighting, a desperate seek of validation, and call bullshit on "needing closure". If you have found yourself seeking closure and unsure why you never feel like you get it, you need to listen to this episode!

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In this weeks episode we recap Love Is Blind season 4 episodes 3 & 4...and boy oh boy do we see some drama stirring. Is it ok to flirt with an ex? Can you spot triangulation? How do trauma bonds even begin? We dig into ALL of these questions & more PLUS we have an audience member write in & ask, "How do I let go? Why do I care about her feelings when mine weren't prioritized?"

In this weeks episode, we wrap up Zach Shallcross’ season of The Bachelor! We discuss concepts like thing slicing (aka being prejudice & how it can screw up your dating experiences), signs of emotional immaturity when communicating, & so much more. 

Next week we start Love Is Blind season 4! Make sure to tune in. 

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Hi Ditchers! We cover the latest episode of The Bachelor, Fantasy Suite Week edition! Otherwise known as "Sex Week" *eye roll*. Learn why we hate this title for the 2nd to last episode of the season and all other breakdown information on Zach's dates with Ariel, Gabi, and Kaity. We talk about eating bugs in Thailand, does talking about plans (or no plans for sex) kill the romance too early on a date, how to navigate anxiety while out with your boo, and how much to disclose to your partner about your (recent) sex life! We go over it all, including our thoughts on how Zach could have supported Gabi much better while she was expressing her concerns (before and after the infamous overnight), and our debate on if Zach really should have told Kaity about his sexcapades with one of the other ladies. In this, we talk about feeling guilt and shame after doing something that you know isn't so great and definitely might have a negative impact on your partner. Is coming clean really the best or most responsible choice? What does it mean to sit in that guilt and shame to allow this experience settle before deciding what doing better in the future looks like.

But first!.. we talk about pre-date rituals. What they can look like, how they help, and what it looks like if you don't plan for them. Let us know about your pre-date rituals in the comments!

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In this week's episode of The Bachelor we see Zach Shallcross go through some hometown hiccups! Meeting the parents & family of a new partner can be awkward & uncomfortable, & for Zach there were definitely some moments that got icky. We also discuss how Rom-Coms have normalized toxic relationship patterns!

Things are heating up on Zach Shallcross' season of The Bachelor! We see confrontation between the girls in the house & also with Zach, & sometimes it's handled well & other times....not so much. Tune in to hear our feedback on how to handle confrontation within relationships like a boss so that you don't allow conflict resolution be the thing that tears you apart. 

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How do you feel about change? Do you thrive in it, or feel like you're jumping off a cliff you'd really rather not be on? On this episode of Ditch the Script, we talk about how to deal with the anxiety that often comes up in the wake of big and small changes. We offer some practical insight on how to recognize you're having a pre-change freak out and what to do with it so you can keep it pushing and move toward your goals! 

Of course, we cover the latest episode of The Bachelor. Your hosts break down what made Gabi's one-on-one date so successful and our thoughts on Greer's reactions throughout the episode, especially that awkward zoom date #IYKYK 

The group date gave us more to discuss than you'd think! Zach's absence caused a lot of the girls to feel rejected. This episode of DTS discussed what we mean by "feelings aren't facts", and how to validate how you're feeling without letting these feelings takeover and change the context of your experience. 

This episode covers the latest episode of the Bachelor, and we'e going to the BAHAMAS folks!!! Well, we're not, but we do learn that Bri has been manifesting a sexy getaway there at the same time that this episode aired. A coincidence? I think not!!!!

Ditch The Script covers all the details from Zach's 1-1 with Kat, the infamous group date that led to Anastasia's timely departure, the incident with Kylie that kicked this all off, and Brooklyn's fun 1-1. We talk being vulnerable on dates, how to receive that vulnerability, and the purpose of taking responsibility and sitting in that shame to make use of it in the future for your benefit. This episode also breaks down the subtle yet distinct differences between using physical touch to relieve anxiety and seek reassurance vs. having physical touch shows up as a result of magnetic energy drawing two people together. Spicy!!!!

As a bonus, Alex and Bri thought it would be important to follow up about the latest news between Raven and SK, from Love is Blind Season 3, following Raven's interview disclosing the details of her experience finding out about SK's chronic infidelity. You're going to want to hear the information DTS adds to the chat on this one. 

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This week, we explore what to do when looking for something to go wrong in your relationship when it feels like it is too good to be true & of course, we jump back into the mansion madness to check back in with what is happening on this season of ABC's The Bachelor with Zach Shallcross! We spot major signs of anxious attachment & deep insecurity that manifest as condescending & catty behaviors between the ladies. 

Have you ever felt like your anxiety was interfering with your dating life or making connections? We hear you. What if we told you that you don't have to "fix" your anxiety in order to make the meaningful connections you are looking for. On this episode of Ditch The Script, we go over this week's episode of The Bachelor with our main guy, Zach. We found a few amazing tips modeled by our bachelor and some of the ladies as well! We break it all down in this episode, you won't wanna miss it. 

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It's time to unpack ABC's The Bachelor with Zach Shallcross! This week we meet the suitresses going after Zach's heart, and  we are already seeing some red flags poppin up! We also discuss the #1 way to get your date to notice YOU!!!! Get ready to take some notes on how to level up your dating game, & plug into this weeks episode! 

Love is Blind season 3 had us shook each week! As we come to an end analyzing the finale & reunion, we bring up the necessary discussion around abusive behaviors that have been normalized by society & we recap the GREEN FLAGS we see in the couples who made it!

We're nearing the end of our Love Is Blind Season 3 coverage!!! But before we see the final "I dos" or "I don'ts", Ditch The Script explores all of the red flags we see in most of the couples as they lead up to their final days together before heading to the altar. 

This episode covers it all:

• Does sleeping in different beds kill intimacy in a relationship?
• How to know you should let go even if you're still in love
• Your gut is likely telling you everything you need to know as long as you know how to listen
• Big romantic gestures do not make up for toxic conflict cycles!

& so much more..

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We continue to unpack season 3 of Love Is Blind & as the couples move in together, we are seeing LOADS of red flags, narcissistic tendencies, & unhealthy ways of coping! Are ANY of these couples going to go the distance? Is love truly blind? Listen in as we analyze & discuss it all!

We continue to unpack season 3 of Love Is Blind & as the couples move in together, we are seeing LOADS of red flags, narcissistic tendencies, & unhealthy ways of coping! Are ANY of these couples going to go the distance? Is love truly blind? Listen in as we analyze & discuss it all! 

WOW! As we continue to unpack Love Is Blind, Brianna & I are seeing red flags ALL over the place with very few green flags to speak of! In this weeks episode we discuss how much honesty is too much honesty, some communication tactics that we need to avoid, & we see some abusive behaviors that WE NEED to call out since they have been sooo normalized. 

We are continuing with Love Is Blind Season 3 (ep. 3 & 4) & holy sh*t we are DISTURBED by some of the red flags we are seeing. How do you handle moving quickly with intimacy? What are signs of emotional maturity & immaturity? And SHOULD we be 100% honest about every thought & feeling we have with our partners? 

AND what was up with Andrew's "tears"? We discuss it ALL this week in this value packed episode! 

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This is the first episode of the highly requested Love Is Blind Season 3 coverage! Brought to you by your trusted Ditch The Script podcasts hosts! In this pod we cover the first 2 episodes of LIBS3 so hang onto your spoilers and get to know the new cast with us! We're told this is bound to be a dramatic season and we can't wait to unpack the rest. Listen as we break down the early connections and spot out the common dating mistakes that most of have made in our experiences so far. But fear not! There are some solid examples of healthy dating going on that if you blinked, you might miss it! Per usual, Ditch The Script is committed to pointing out the dating behaviors we could all learn from, positive and negative. Follow through to the end of the episode to learn who we aware the Red and Green Flag of this week. Tune into new episodes every Monday as we'll be covering Love Is Blind Season 3 2 episodes at a time! We're scared but we're ready lol. 

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Goodbye Paradise!!! See you next year! As this season of Bachelor In Paradise comes to a close we see more narcissistic tendencies, emotional immaturity, & attachment styles pop up BUT we also see growth, vulnerability, & true connection.

And YES! We of course dig into all the tea on Victoria Fuller & Greg Grippo as they blast their new found relationship with each other loud & proud! What do we think about it all? Do we think Victoria cheated for real? You'll have to listen to find out!

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Ditch The Script covers Week 8 (Episodes 1 and 2) of Bachelor in Paradise this week! All the drama gets dissected as we gear up for the BIP finale in the coming week! As no surprise to absolutely anyone, your hosts do a deep dive of all the toxic patterns we spot as engagements are around the corner. We're looking at you, Kate, Arron, and Ency (surprisingly!). If you got the ick while watching the fight between Aaron and Genevieve play out, or when Andrew was desperate to leave Paradise while Ency did everything in her power to beg him to stay, you'll want to hear our detailed takes on this toxicity that plays out in these moments. If you have been suspecting that you're caught in a toxic pattern, this is the episode to listen for. Don't worry, take note of the specific signs to look out for so you can feel empowered to make the safest and healthiest decision for you. We love you!

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