What does it mean to have a spiritual practice and to consciously be on a spiritual path? Listen in for discussions on being an earthling in this incarnation while still recognizing you are an evolving soul.
This is the title of the holistic psychologist book and I love her work. But not everybody is self-driven and can do work online and not everybody can take generic advice and generic exercises and make them specific to their own life and their own growth. Some people have been debilitated by their parents and or the educational system and are so wounded that they literally cannot take the first steps to work on themselves. This is not a criticism this is an honest assessment that one has to make for themselves. There is no shame and working with someone else there is no shame in accepting help and guidance. I hope this podcast gives you some small tools to get started.
Being a good person does not mean that you do public acts in the public eye so that everybody notices how great you are. Being a good person means performing private intimate Acts for yourself that make you proud of who You are ...respect to you are and in fact you become your own superhero.
Addicts behave like addicts. People pleasing addicts are a little bit harder because others enjoy having people pleasers around. But like all addicts if you're a people pleaser you will spend most of your time manipulating everybody's impression about you and coming off as a very false and inauthentic person. This does tremendous damage to the family not to mention to the Self. With chemical addictions people will often finally speak up but it's very hard to prove people pleasing therefore it is much harder for a people pleaser to get into recovery.
Is it depression? Or maybe you just never been happy or peaceful. Transitioning from trauma based life or an anxiety based life to one that's working can actually be a little bit stressful and confusing.
After healing emotionally and on the psychological level.... take this to another level of learning and healing and evolution. After years on a Spiritual Path you may not have to do the emotional healing.... But if you have feelings you cannot skip over them and do spiritual bypassing. If you have emotions they are your Teachers. Soul Evolution comes with years of work and emotions become less of your Teachers and you are taught in other ways but you cannot skip the steps to get there.
Honesty with the self especially... is the cornerstone of healing. Confessing while groveling on the floor in shame is not honesty. Handling shame has to come first then honesty can come second. And honesty comes with discernment meaning you have to know who you can be honest with and to what degree.
Sounds so simple. And yet with a 68% divorce rate and over half of the Nation on medication need a prescription or recreational you have to wonder what's missing that people are feeling themselves with addictions and distractions in order to feel alive.
A number of my students got initiated with my Teacher. I thought I would talk about this and some of the things that were said at the workshop. For those of you who weren't here next year you can come if you plan ahead. My Teacher also stops in a number of other cities check his website.
All these new age slogans. Being your authentic self is complicated because not everybody is just worthy and not everybody is your best friend. And where you are on your healing journey and how vulnerable you are able to be and how open you are able to be is a personal choice.
Have you ever noticed that when you're in pain or feeling desperate you up yourself care you do things to make yourself feel joyful and happy? And then when life gets good you find it difficult if not impossible to make time to enjoy your life. What a strange dilemma.
Any person who has been wounded will have done horrible things to other people. They didn't mean it. Just like a wounded animal might bite and attack you they didn't mean it either. But at some point there is a stage of healing where you have to go back and look on accountability in order to heal your heart. We call The looking back part.... inventory. In order to heal the heart that's called making amends both to yourself and to other people when it will not cause them more harm than the original event or occurrence. And this age of worshiping the victim and overindulging in entitlement and moving towards toxic positivity this stage of healing and becoming a mature person that is responsible and accountable seems to have disappeared into the smoke of I deserve it.... I deserve it all and I want it. 💔
It's not easy to be an aware Spiritual person and yet it gives us a depth of life that is not always available to others. It makes relating to other people a little bit more complex with many different choices. Hope you find this podcast helpful.
Working with a Spiritual Teacher or a healer or even a therapist it's very special kind of relationship. And yet so many people especially in the spiritual movement or industry where there is a lot of ego and people want to be the all powerful healer clairvoyant telepath etc. spend a great deal of time analyzing and critiquing their chosen Teacher. Analyzing someone else in order to figure out your boundaries and tolerances it's definitely a good thing to do with friendships and love relationships and family. With a Teacher what I always look at is what am I learning. And does that Teacher have a practice... do they walk their talk. Beyond that I follow the 12th step advice "take the best and leave the rest." People on ego trips very often like to study with someone in order to bring them down or compare themselves in order to make themselves feel better. And then they will engage in a passive aggressive relationship with their Teacher and a secret game of compare and compete never asking questions never finding out backstories that are typically none of their business anyway. And then the hostility will fall out at some point. when you are walking this path you cannot be a student you cannot learn because all you're interested in doing is finding the flaws in someone you admire so you can feel better about yourself. Your Teacher is not your friend or your lover and therefore you are not at risk with getting submerged in a personality relationship. Your Teacher's personality and choices are none of your business. You don't do this with your car mechanic or your dentist do you? No because there's no ego gratification in that. If you have a cranky mechanic who does a great job you might keep that mechanic. Or you might decide it's too annoying and move on but you will not psychoanalyze them and tell your mechanic you don't like their tone of voice or how they're handling the wrench. Why do you do this with your Spiritual Teacher... Or with any authority figure that you admire? That is the question you need to be asking yourself if you want to become a student. Not everybody can learn. some people are too busy posturing presenting and competing to be a learner.
The great Spiritual Teachers talk about how we will change and be and behave as we evolve. But we cannot put on those behaviors like clothing on top of a body of inner demons. You can't fake it to you make it. You have to cleanse in order to evolve. You have to face the darkness in order to evolve. The evolution then that comes will match what the Teachers have taught you. Only now it will be your authentic behavior.
Acceptance and surrender is such a foreign concept to westerners. most people react to it as a kind of passive resignation perhaps even being a doormat. However it is not that at all. It is complicated and here are some thoughts on how I approach this primary practice of the Tao.
For those of you who know the story of recovery in five chapters you will know what this title means. For those of you who don't know that story it is a common tool used in Alcoholics Anonymous. You might want to look it up. I've been taking some ongoing courses again and reading research-based material and that inspired this podcast. I also found a book you might want to check out it's a little extreme so take what you can use and leave the rest but it's written by a clinician and it's called F*ck Feelings.
Most people don't even know what fun is anymore. It is not recovery it is not distraction and it is definitely not when you're high or drunk. Having fun boosts your immune system as well as brain chemistry and in general feeds your body mind and soul. But most people these days need to learn how to have fun. and if you had a rough childhood you literally do not have the neural pathways for fun and learning to have fun might actually stress you out ....at first. Listen on 🙏🏼🌷
The new age industry sells you the story of your life purpose and your destiny and your gifts. Ultimately you're making other human beings your God telling you through their methods and workshops why you are here on Earth. The Eastern traditions and Taoism in particular work a completely different way. if you're tired of spending thousands of dollars on an ego trip because after all they never tell you your life purpose is to conquer alcoholism or put up with an abusive mate there's always something spectacular because that's what sells....so if you're tired of that nonsense listen on. 🙏🏼🌷
The new age industry loves being out of body. The Eastern traditions teach you that this life this incarnation is your Path. You designed it and chose it before you ever were born. It is the schooling you wanted to elevate your soul to a higher level.
When you have fantasies about other people, when you have unspoken expectations, you will always find yourself in situations where you feel betrayed or disrespected or abandoned. And then you stop trusting other people when really the problem is learning to trust yourself.
Presenting as a victim or even victimizing your Self is a horrible self destructive pattern that causes you a great deal of pain. It also absolves you of any accountability and deflects your deeper more honest feelings. How do you stop this painful and destructive pattern?
I never know what episode this is. This was recorded on January 4th 2021. Becoming conscious and living as an awakened being will take you through giant periods of transitions that do not go quickly. It is a slow and in the beginning torturous process. After a while it is a joyous process but the first few times you go through it it is extremely challenging and it is a time when very often people turn around they do a u-turn and go back to their old dysfunctional choices because the new is so scary. Finding ways to get through the terror is a work of art, the art of self-care
Detachment like forgiveness is Grace granted by Spirit after you do the hard work of learning how you're feeling. And being willing to feel those feelings so you can learn the lessons they are giving you. Only then can Spirit take from you and Grant you detachment or forgiveness because you have learned what you needed to learn.
We need to find a balance between growth and punishing ourselves because we think we are not enough as we are right now. Start where you are says Pema Chodron... And actually every spiritual path. Start where you are means you accept where You are right now. Because that means you learn what you need to learn right now and only then can there be progression.
You can't practice self-love when you secretly still hate yourself. This seems to be one of the most taboo subjects in the current New age industry. You're not allowed to talk about it or even admitted exists. And that attitude will kill you.
What does it really mean to be on a spiritual path? most people have a concept that it means you meditate a lot and your vegan and you always act calmly and your carry mala and pray a lot. Living a spiritual path means living awakened and living awakened means being mindful. It's as simple ....and as complicated as that.
It's not what you do it's how you do it. It's the timing, it's the energy around it, it's your consciousness about your choice and your self-awareness. Many people are involved with self-indulgence or self-abuse rather than self-care. It is complex. Self-care also has to do with having parenting skills so that you can help yourself mature and handle the challenges of life and if you have no idea what healthy parenting looks like you will be unable to do this part of self-care until you learn.
Overgiving can be a trait of codependency. It can be a trait of low self-esteem. Sometimes it's for people pleasing but other times it's to control people kind of like banking. I'm making deposits with these people with the assumption that they will pay me back when I need it. it's easy to put a label on your behavior but what we really need to do is dig deep and find out what's going on. Join life path healings for another dog walk and some contemplation
Nothing on this Earth thrives without stress. Stress on the discomfort that goes with it both stimulate and challenges the body mind and Spirit to be our very best. You see this in biology and throughout all the sciences. And Brene Brown's wonderful research has added to this body of knowledge. This means you have to do things. You can't just read and listen. Journey on
Two wonderful slogans. They seem to be contradictory but actually they are not . They work hand in hand like yin and yang however if you have not done some self work it is your wounded self that will be choosing the Bliss and it will be your wound itself that tells you how to do hard things. and when your wound itself is guiding you instead of Spirit the path is hard and Rocky. We have to start at the beginning . Listen. 🙏🏼🌷
Self-healing is a cool concept but not everybody can do it and sometimes even if you do self heal there might be times you cannot. Find out what it takes to self-heal and find out some tools you can use to train yourself and self-healing and self learning