Find The Magic
By Find The Magic
Find The Magic Jan 27, 2020
279 // Are You Choosing Attachment Over Authenticity?
Belonging is a deep instinctual need we have as a societal based species, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that many of us as children (and adults) choose approval of other humans over authenticity and self trust inside of ourselves.
Once we are aware of this instinct, analysis of our behavior choices become incredible interesting. We have now brought subconscious motives to the surface and can make decisions from a place of intention and consciousness, and this can prove to create beautiful moments of unconditional love and empowerment.
Related Episodes:
Authoritative Parenting / Arguably the MOST Effective Parenting Style
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278 // NO: a toddlers newly learned word
Have you ever had the experience of when your toddler begins to say “no” to your request? It can be a puzzling experience, if not downright annoying. In this episode we share tips and tools for how to handle these situations in an unruffled way.
Related Episodes
Magic Moment // Trap of the "Too Good" Mother
This episode Felica unpacks the tale of the too sweet mother and how we can learn to avoid extremes in our parenting from apathy to over parenting.
We hope you enjoy!
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276 // Self-Care: How To Do It Right
Self-care seems to be a buzzword that gets swept up in consumerism and consequently the real meaning and purpose of self-care gets blurry. In today’s episode, we talk about what self-care really is and how intentionality, mindfulness, and boundaries can help us connect better to ourselves and others.
Related episodes
257 // How to Handle Parent Guilt, Reinventing Ourselves, and Bossy Kids
How to: Create Pockets of Peace
Running a Household Without Resentment
Sponsor:
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275 // Come What May–Be Present
We all have times in our lives when we are apprehensive for what will come or even what's happening here and now, maybe we even dread it. In this episode, Katelin talks about the lessons she learned from a meaningful experience she had that can help us all as we encounter welcome and not-so-welcome events in our lives.
Related episodes
223 // The Power of Being Present NOW
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274 // Respect; it's mutual with Joe Newman Author of Raising Lions
It seems there is an epidemic of disrespect, whining, tantrums, talking back and in general, less respect than we saw in previous generations of kids. We are burned out as parents and we don't see a way out. This ends in being ultra strict or ultra passive because we just feel burnt out.
In this episode Felica talks with Joe Newman about mutual recognition. This is the practice of back and forth respect that we should see to establish in our homes for a peaceful environment. Oftentimes the balance is shifted in favor of respecting our children but is not returned. There is a place in the middle where we can create a mutually respectful relationship with our kids.
Related Episodes
When Other People Disagree With Your Parenting
The Martyr Effect. HOW TO Stop Offering Ourselves at the Altar of Parenting
Raising Lions: The Art of Compassionate Discipline with Joe Newman
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273 // When Life Throws Us a Curveball with Brene Brown’s Atlas of the Heart
273 // When Things Don’t Go as Planned
We all like to plan for life and set expectations for how things should go, but what happens when life doesn’t go as planned? Or people or circumstances don’t meet expectations? We try to have a baby and are unable, we lose jobs, marriages end, we lose faith. In this episode we talk about the disappointment, regrets, discouragement, and frustration associated with these situations and tools we can use to view and navigate them with greater understanding and peace.
Main Ideas
The language we use to define our emotions matters!
Disappointment vs. Regret - we feel disappointment when things don’t go how we wanted them to, and we feel the outcome is out of our control. We feel regret when things don’t go how we wanted, and we feel the outcome was caused by our own decisions, actions, or failure to act.
Regret can be one of our greatest (and most uncomfortable) teachers
Tools we talk about - Involving God, “TFT”s from Brené Brown, Fear Setting from Tim Ferris
Related Episodes
263 // HOW TO Move Through the Stress Cycle and Stay Out of Overwhelm
216 // What Resentment Reveals & Understanding Envy
214 // Compassion: Where Love Meets Suffering and Remains Love
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272 // Facing the Waves of Life with Taralyn
272 // Magic Moment: When Life’s Waves Tumble you
Does it ever feel like you are just being thrashed by the waves of life? Most of us have felt that way. In this episode, Taralyn describes some things she learned about facing waves in the ocean in Costa Rica. Sometimes it is helpful to face them with peaceful warrior strength; sometimes, its easier to duck under and let the wave roll over us, and sometimes we can surrender to it and allow ourselves to rest as we roll through them. Also, let’s not forget the joy of riding the waves! Sometimes life is a joyful ride, and thats important to enjoy also.
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271 // 5 Tips for Implementing a Successful Quiet Time
270 // Protecting Your Children Against Sexual Abuse with Feather Berkower
269 // Weathering Winter
All of us experience metaphorical winters throughout our lives—times of emotional upheaval, physical taxation, or perhaps just times when we need more rest. Many of us also live in places where the outward cycles of our environment shift from warm and sunny to cold and darker.
In this episode, Taralyn explores the concept of wintering as a philosophy, where we actually give ourselves permission to rest, to lean into the darkness as we incubate and grow our deep internal strength we feel ourselves swing back into the light.
Books and links she mentioned:
Wintering // Katherine May
How Light Affects Our Sleep, Fertility, Our Child’s Behavior, and More With Andy Mant
Craving a Slow Down? Start With Your Mind
Going With the Flow: Allowing Ourselves to Rest, Work, and Play With Meridith Bienvenue
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Related EpisodesThank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the page
268 // HOW TO Renew & Recommit to Your Healthy Habits
It is a New Year! How can we renew our habits with a recommitment to ourselves? We talk through a listener question about just this! Let's find motivation together.
Related Episodes
Discovering YOUR Life Essentials
EP 111 POWER TO MOTIVATE YOURSELF USING GRETCHIN RUBIN'S FOUR TENDENCIES
Habits Deep Dive / Why Simple Changes Compound into Big Results (Atomic Habits by James Clear)
267// Magic Moment Clear Unwanted Patterns & Make Room For 2024
Before we can add in NEW yummy desires and goals for 2024 we have to clear out the old. Our psyche can be full of unwanted triggers and patterns and this can be the very thing blocking us from becoming who we would like to be. Feel bogged down? Tune in for a quick retune before you embark on your 2024 goal setting.
The Greatest Gift We Can Give, Connection & How To Maintain it with Our Kids
Connection may just be the cure all to childhood misbehavior and troubles but it is harder to foster than any of us would want! In this episode we dive into one of our favorite books "Hold Onto Your Kids" by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Maté MD and pull our favorite tips for maintaining a strong relationship with our children as well as signs and symptoms that may point to a connection issue! We also discuss how and why kids become "peer oriented" and why it is happening more and more.
We hope this episode leaves you empowered to create strong family bonds and connections that will heal past hurts and forge new relationship paths for future success!
Authoritative Parenting / Arguably the MOST Effective Parenting Style
Discovering YOUR Life Essentials
Solitude Through Digital Minimalism
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Related Episodes Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the page
265 // Moving Our Stuck Energy & Discovering What We Already Know with Kristen of MotherTree Reiki
Reiki is known as the divine movement of life force energy and is used as a healing technique to guide stuck energy from our chakras into alignment with our true purpose and intention. This week Felica interview Reiki Master Kristen Morris of MotherTree Reiki about her journey guiding people to know themselves better and she shares her experience having a healing session with Kristen!
They talk about how our energy can prevent us from knowing ourselves fully and how reiki can move us into alignment.
You can learn more about Kristen at @mothertreereiki
Related Episodes
How to Enhance Your Ability to Be Present
227 // Magic Moment: Recommitting to Your Phone Detox
204 // Daily Life As a Spiritual PracticeSolitude Through Digital Minimalism
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the page
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264 // Navigating Difficult Parenting Differences by Modeling Gratitude
In this episode we answer a question about how to respond when other adults in our lives want to parent our kids in a way that differs from our desires. Listen in for ideas on how to navigate these situations in a way that honors ourselves, our kids, and the other loving (and often well-meaning) adults in our lives.
Related Episodes
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the page
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263 // HOW TO Move Through the Stress Cycle and Stay Out of Overwhelm
Stress is a fact of life, getting stuck in it isn't! When we are stuck in chronic stress or our stressors push us past our ability to cope we find ourselves in overwhelm. This episode we unpack Atlas of The Heart, the work of Brene Brown, as a guide to moving through stress and out of overwhelm. We touch on ways that we can identify the feeling in our body before it becomes overwhelmed and our favorite tips and tools for increasing our ability to cope with these often uncomfortable feelings.
9:00- Definition of Stress vs. Overwhelm
15:26 - Where do we feel stress/overwhelm in our bodies?
18:30 - Your body keeps the score
22:52 - Move through the tunnel
23:50 - Completion of the stress cycle
25:50 - Fight, flight, or freeze
28:30 - Using RAIN from Tara Brach as a tool
31:45 - Grounding
36:11 - Having a positive social interaction
40:06 - Creative expression
262 // Taralyn’s Alignment Search
It sometimes feels like we are being pulled in many directions, and it is hard to feel settled and aligned when that is happening. In this episode, Taralyn describes a few things she has learned lately in her wrestle for alignment.
The steps she has used to help her are:
1-Identify what parts of you are misaligned and intentionally give them all a seat in your council.
2-Set aside time daily to imagine what it would feel like to have that settled feeling of being aligned in your heart, mind, body, and spirit. Use that powerful brain of yours to try on the feeling of having all of the parts be in harmony. Tapping into this vibration helps you pull it towards you. Grounding is also a really helpful tool during this step. The shower is a great place to try this habit because its daily and the water is so conductive.
4-Think bigger. Zoom out your perspective and observe that YOU are not your body, your emotions, or your mind. Once you FEEL that, aligning all of them becomes easier--like a magnet rearranging metal shavings.
If you try this, Taralyn would LOVE to know how it goes for you. Just DM her on instagram @taralyngriffin
Our Daily Meditation: this is the meditation that Taralyn does every morning. You simply push play and she walks you through it. It’s an easy way to get yourself into the habit.
Breathwork Exercises for Daily Habit Building with Taralyn
203 // Meditation: Letting Fear Go
Finding Motivation to Claim Your Personal Power Hour
Make Your Morning Routine Happen!
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Related Episodes
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the page
261// How 'Respectful Parenting' Fails & Remedies with Joe Newman
"No one listens to me!"
"I feel like the train engine running our whole home."
"I am exhausted, will it always be this hard?"
Finding the right parenting style for your family is hard. Information flies at us from all direction challenging us to "listen more", "be more strict." etc ... ultimately what we want is a dynamic, respectful and loving relationship with our children.
In this episode Felica interviews Joe Newman, author of Raising Lions, about his work for his new book. They discuss how respectful parenting can be taken too far when we are respecting our children but they are showing no respect back and why this happens.
Related Episodes
How to: Create Pockets of Peace
Running a Household Without Resentment
Books and Links We Mentioned
Fairplay // Eve Rodsky
Raising Lions // Joe Newman
No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline Without Shame // Janet Lansbury
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
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260 // How to Handle Parent Guilt, Reinventing Ourselves, and Bossy Kids {Best of}
Do you ever feel parent guilt? We get so many questions from listeners about the torn feeling that comes while trying to balance being a whole person ourselves while still serving our families with love. In this episode, we answer this question as we discuss how we can set boundaries for ourselves, protect our own personal time (shower time, bathroom, etc.) and learn to coexist with more ease without young children.
We also address questions about reinventing ourselves as our children grow, how to handle kids being sneaky and hiding things, and how to deal with our children being bossy and having public meltdowns.
Related Episodes
How to: Create Pockets of Peace
Running a Household Without Resentment
Books and Links We Mentioned
Fairplay // Eve Rodsky
Raising Lions // Joe Newman
No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline Without Shame // Janet Lansbury
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
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259// Magic Moment Get Out of The Trap of Overwhelm!
This episode is a balm to stress and overwhelm. If you are feeling trapped in the storm of life this episode is for you. Felica shares her favorite quick tips for regulating her nervous system when things are just too much!
If you liked this episode don't forget to share it and leave a review! We appreciate you so much.
Review of the week
*nicole0304h*, 10/03/2023
Can I be friends with them?I LOVE this podcast. As a mom, and a former therapist—they speak to my heart from such a real, empowering and practical perspective. I glean so many tips and tidbits from what they share and appreciate their honesty and ability to respect different points of views on topics. They truly do their research and have conversations that make me think, laugh and secretly want to be friends with them!
Related Episodes
Tips for Overcoming Distraction
258// Can Eroticism and Safety Co- Exist? With Jennifer Finlayson-Fife
Our favorite sex therapist is back and this time we are challenging the assumption that sexual desire dies with long term relationships. Felica interviews Dr. Finlayson-Fife and they dive into the challenges we face to "keep the fire alive".Esther Perel said " Eroticism is the antithesis to everything a healthy family life needs, ritual, routine and knowing. Safety and security. Eroticism is adventure" , in this episode we tease out the nuance in this and discover what eroticism TRULY means. Hint ** it isn't all about sex/ desire.We also touch on the fact that families are more child centered than ever with higher expectations for couples. All responsibility often falls on parents, not community, institutions or society. We set up play dates and take pictures of and talk about and invest in our kids yet our personal and couple relationships are left to shrivel up. How can we do better?We tackle all this and more! Don't miss this chance to bring more erotic energy into your life.
Links We Mentioned
https://www.goodinside.com/podcast/4759/sex-after-kids-tell-me-more-esther-perel/
Related Episodes
How to Own Your Own Desires with Dr.Finlayson Fife
Discovering Self within Our Sexuality & Overcoming Betrayal
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much! Each week we choose a winner to receive a FREE JOURNAL for leaving a review! Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
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257//Magic Moment Are You Over Identifying With Your Role As Mother?
256 // Our Favorite Value Aligning Techniques for Intentional Parenting {Best of}
So often in parenting, we find ourselves...losing our cool, to put it nicely. We respond with anger; we use bribing or coercion to make our kids behave, and we hurt our relationship with our kids and ourselves in the process. In this episode, we take a deep dive into individual steps we can take anytime we find ourselves triggered by our kids’ behavior. We start with ourselves, pause, attune to our child, and then respond, not react, by setting limits and allowing logical consequences by looking at the need being expressed by our child’s behavior. This conversation will help you reframe difficult parenting situations and allow you to focus on the priority of your relationship.
Take a pause to connect to your intuition when making decisions.
Pay attention to what you fear and ask yourself why? Parenting helps us see ourselves more clearly. Don’t parent from a place of lack.
The Pause - Give your self time and space with your children
Use breath to bring yourself into the present moment and pause
Sometimes bad behavior is a cry for connection.
Time Stamps
8:00- How do we live from a place of authenticity when parenting
12:31 - Take a pause to connect to your intuition when making decisions
18:15 - Parenting from a place of lack vs. wholeness
21:00 - Meditation practice to give your child self love and acceptance
24:33 - Journal out your fears with your kids to process them
29:00 - The Pause - Give your self time and space with your children
37:30 - Zone of zero reactivity
46:50 - Come to each situation with a response vs. a reaction
52:31 - Natural consequences vs. Cultivating consequences
You can listen to this episode on most other platforms here :)Are you feeling lost, unanchored or listless in your days? We use our daily planner and journal to align our core values with the tasks we do each day! You can learn more about it HERE
Related Episodes
Authoritative Parenting / Arguably the most EFFECTIVE Parenting Style
Holding Boundaries / Discipline Pt. 1
Systems and Values for Easier Days and Stronger Family Connections
Parenting with Unconditional Love
Books and links we mentioned;
The Awakened Family // Shefali Tsabary
The Conscious Parent // Shefali Tsabary
255// Facing Our Fear {Best of}
Original Post date 10/25/22
Fear is a powerful emotion. All of us face it at some point of another, and often, it really puts a damper on the way we live our lives. It can interfere with us loving wholeheartedly and doing things that inspire (and scare) us. In this episode, Taralyn dives deep into the concept of facing and processing our fears so they don’t hold us back in life. She addresses 3 different kinds of fear, and walks you through steps to free yourself from the fears that don’t serve you.
Books Taralyn Mentioned:
Gift of Fear // Gavin De Becker
Fear: Essential Wisdom for Getting Through the Storm // Thich Nhat Hanh
Related Episodes:
Escaping the Trance of Unworthiness and Finding Self Acceptance Within
Tapping Into the Abundance Inside Us
254// Creating Roots Through Family Traditions {Best Of}
The holiday season can feel overwhelming because we feel the need to do everything to make them exciting and special. However, the beauty of having our own families is that we can intentionally choose the holiday activities that serve us and let go of the ones that don’t. The magic of family traditions is that they help our children feel a sense of belonging and gives them roots, which helps them identify with the connection of the family instead of peer groups and can help with their behavior.
In this episode, we share the traditions that serve us with simplicity and joy and give you many options to try with your own family. We talk about how sometimes all it takes is to recognize the traditions we already have and capitalize on naming them and making them reoccurring and special.
From Halloween fun, ways to be grateful in November and loads of Christmas and winter traditions we hope that this episode inspires you to create new memories with your family and recognize your current traditions to turn them into magical ones that repeat every year!
You can listen to this episode on iTunes here and many other platforms here.
Books we mentioned:
Hold on to Your Kids // Gabor Mate
The Entitlement Trap // Linda and Richard Eyre
Food Nanny Rescues Dinner // Liz Edmunds
Related Episodes:
Systems and Values for Easier Days and Stronger Family Connections
253// Susan Stiffelman On Remaining Present in Parenting (BEST OF)
There is nothing quite like parenting--it’s something we want to desperately do well at, and it is simultaneously one of the most difficult things that many of us will ever do. We face fears, failure, triggers of our own emotions, often while experiencing physical and emotional fatigue. However, because of this, children have the capacity to be our greatest teachers. They allow us the opportunity to truly look inside of ourselves when we are triggered, and wake up to our own nature.
In this episode, Felica had the incredible opportunity of discussing this topic with parenting expert and author, Susan Stiffelman, MFT. She explains how we can use the practice of being present to truly use this journey we have as parents to truly evolve ourselves as we face the daunting task of raising humans to do the same. Her books and her words are unbelievably inspiring and will help you as you navigate your own parenting experience.
You can learn more about Susan Stiffelman and her work and sign up for her newsletter on her website: https://susanstiffelman.com. She is offering a webinar you can join her in about coparenting with a narcissist here.
You can listen to this episode on iTunes here or on many other platforms here.
Books we mentioned:
Parenting with Presence // Susan Stiffelman
Parenting without Power Struggles // Susan Stiffelman
Loving What Is // Byron Katie
Playful Parenting // Lawrence Cohen
Related Episodes:
Finding Joy and Enthusiasm in Every Day
The Martyr Effect. HOW TO Stop Offering Ourselves at the Altar of Parenting
Tapping Into the Abundance Inside Us
Janet Lansbury’s episode: The Best Way to Deal With Intense Tantrums
252 // Habits Deep Dive / Why Simple Changes Compound into Big Results (Atomic Habits by James Clear) {Best Of}
It can appear like people who are successful at achieving their goals simply possess an incredible amount of self control. That kind of belief lets us off the hook from creating the life we really want--we simply lack the self discipline, right? Well, it turns out that as we create habits that add value to our lives, we actually require LESS self control, not more. As we change our environment and our cues and rewards, we have the power to eliminate negative habits and build positive ones that can transform our life. Habits are the key to making our goals a reality. We discuss the science behind habits and explore the work of experts on the subject. We break down the steps for creating a good habit (or ridding yourself of a bad one), and give you applicable tips that you can use right away in your life. We share what has really worked in our own lives as we have experimented with habits and unlocked the magic of things like habit stacking.
Books that inspired us:
Atomic Habits // James Clear
Deep Work // Cal Newport
Essentialism // Greg McKeown
Getting Things Done // David Allen
The Power of Habit // Charles Duhigg
Our Related Episodes:
Habits for High Performance
Systems and Values for Easier Days and Stronger Family Connection
Make Your Morning Routine Happen!
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251 // Making It Easy to Do What Matters Most With Greg McKeown {Best of}
We often receive the message that we can have it all; we can do it all. Social media messages, societal expectations, and our own self talk often feeds the lie that we can do EVERYTHING. When we don’t live up to the unrealistic expectation that we can do everything and succeed at everything, there is a cost to our mental health.
In this episode, we discuss this topic with New York Times best selling author, Greg McKeown. He helps identify the lie that we can do everything, and instead offers a path of wisdom, balance, and priorities instead of the wild racing that we often indulge in when we are trying to say yes to everything. He gives us very applicable steps on how to make doing what truly matters to us easy.
BOOKS AND LINKS:
Greg’s Website: https://gregmckeown.com
Effortless: Make It Easier to Do What Matters Most // Greg McKeown
Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less // Greg McKeown
RELATED EPISODES
250// HOW TO Respond to Never Ending Demands & Requests Wholeheartedly
Research indicates that preschoolers, on average, make three demands/requests per minute! Wow. It’s no wonder we feel overwhelmed. “Watch me!” “Get that!” “Where’s my dinosaur?!”
In this episode we talk about practical ideas and tools that have helped us navigate the barrage of daily requests, questions, and demands in a way that allows you to maintain calm and respect for your kids and yourself.
Books & Links we mention
Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child: The Heart of Parenting // John Gottman with Joan DeClaire
Mom Watch Compilation by Johnson Files
Related Episodes
How To: Create Pockets of Peace
Time Stamps
10:00 How many requests our kids make per minute
13:15 Why we future focus and how inputs from our kids overwhelm us
14:15 Are our kids self centered?
23:18 Using body language and social cues
25:55 Mom watch this watch this!!
29:00 Do you have a hard time tuning out noise/ kids?
32:18 Good parenting does not mean responding to everything request
40:01 Ask, is my child seeking connection?
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
249 // Cultivating Secure Relationships with the work of Stan Tatkin, Relationship RX
Related Episodes
Putting Connection With Our Spouse First
How to own your desires with Jennifer Finlayson-Fife
Time Stamps
12:00 - Attachment styles
14:05 - Anchors
16:30 - Waves
20:01 - Islands
32:33 - The relationship as an entity should be the highest priority
35:35 - Conflicts within a relationship
44:30 - Am I putting my role as a parent, or my hobby over my primary attachment?
46:17 - Supporting your spouse in parenting
51:40 - Secret password for stressful parenting moments
57:50 - Bring issues up preventatively
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
248 // Intentionally Questioning Our Parenting Choices
There are lots of decisions that we make as parents that are made out of guilt or a sense of obligation. In this episode we talk about how to navigate parenting questions from a place of wholeness in order to figure out what will be best for parent AND child. We talk about whether or not to do preschool and *spoiler alert* there is no one perfect decision. :)
Related Episodes
228 // Making Friendships, Creating Community, and How to Know When You’re Done Having Kids
Guidance for the Changing seasons of Motherhood
Time Stamps
1:44 - To preschool or not to preschool?
3:00 - Taralyn’s experience with kids going or not going to preschool
10:30 - Felica’s experience
14:15 - the questioning of our choices because it’s the worth the wrestle
16:09 - What will be the best for you and your child?
18:55 - Eliminating the guilt
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
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Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
Review of the week from mamaErinE
So much wisdom and humility
You women are amazing, thank you
247 // Revolutionizing Emotional & Physical Healing Postpartum with Arielle Martone
Healing your body and spirit postpartum is a topic that is both under talked about and misunderstood. In this episode Katelin interviews Arielle Martone, doctor of physical therapy, yoga teacher and postnatal coach turned postpartum wellness coach after having 2 kids and overcoming postpartum depression and pelvic pain herself. She has 12+ years of experience and utilizes her knowledge and background to help new moms reconnect to mind/body and actually heal postpartum so they can feel strong and confident not only in their bodies but who they are becoming.
You can learn from Arielle at the following links:
www.instagram.com/ariellemartone
Free Resources
Exhausted to Energized without Sleep Training
Related Episodes
HOW TO Prepare Children for a New Sibling: a Conversation with Upbringing
Prepping Kids for New Babies, Earning vs. Rewarding, Quiet Time Tips, & Our Favorite Life Hacks
Time Stamps
1:42 - Intro to Arielle and the importance of postpartum care
11:40 - The signs to be aware of with Postpartum mood disorders
13:50 - Normalize seeking help vs. normalizing the struggle
16:30 - Feeling like something is “off” is a signal
20:20 - Trust yourself
26:50 - Tips to recover if you feel like you have no time
31:27 - Pay attention to when you’re saying “should”
39:50 - Prioritize your sleep and give yourself grace
41:25 - How “bounce back culture” can be a detriment to our overall health
47:09 - Don’t rush back into physical exercise
51:05 - Trust your body
57:15 - Pelvic Floor Therapy exercises
1:03:00 - Exhausted to energized
1:05:16 - How to get back to our true selves after having kids
246 // Tips for an Intentional Back to School Season
The beginning of the school year is filled with many conflicting emotions for both our kids and us as parents. In this episode we share favorite tips, ideas and traditions that will help you start the year off right and from a place of wholeness.
Related Episodes
Links Mentioned
Fave Books back to school
I Love You All Day Long by Francesca Rusackas
Super Manny Stands up by Kelly DiPucchio
Oh the Places You’ll Go by Dr. Seuss
Time Stamps
12:25 - How to navigate the logistics of going back to school with systems
15:35 - Weekly Clothes Organizer
20:17 - Special back to school dinner with notes of encouragement from family
22:21 - Helping your kids emotionally return to school by addressing your own anxieties
25:21 - Emotional vaccination with your kids
27:24 - Visualizing mediation the night before
27:55 - Review the child whisperer to help your kids deal with the upcoming
31:42 - Reading a back to school book
34:19 - Making love bracelets
35:00 - First day special events
245// Magic Moment Rituals for Emotional Wholeness
244 // Tips for Overcoming Distraction
Centering our minds and finding a place of peace in our days is crucial in modern parenting. Our phones are filled with demands that pull us away from ourselves, our desires and our families. On top of that the demands of our lives from appointments to chores call us away from creating connection and relationships.
In this episode we refresh our determination to keep saying yes to connection and no to superficial distraction. We share why and our favorite tips and tricks for cultivating a present life.
Related Episodes
How to Enhance Your Ability to Be Present
227 // Magic Moment: Recommitting to Your Phone Detox
204 // Daily Life As a Spiritual PracticeSolitude Through Digital Minimalism
Time Stamps
11:04 - How can we curb distraction?
12:15 - Delete your apps
15:00 - Set aside time for phone time
16:30 - Turn off notifications
17:33 - A box for your phone
19:23 - A key to having self control - change your environment
22:46 - How to be present when our minds are preoccupied
24:41 - Maybe lower your standards for what needs to be done
27:20 - Magical mind will serve a magical body
29:00 - Practice being still
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
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REVIEW OF THE WEEK:
Kimberly Br0ssi
I’ve enjoyed this podcast since 2019 and it helped me get through several hard moments. The mini magics are always awesome. All 3 hosts are so great and share how we can care of ourselves so we can better take care of others. Each are at different points in life and motherhood so there’s something for everyone. There are so many episodes that I re-listen to when I need the reminders!
Great for any woman, young or old, new mom or veteran. Thank you!
real and refreshing
243 // Magic Moment: The Power of Play
Have you ever tried to teach your kid a value? Or help them stop taking toys? Or handle a conflict within a friendship or with a sibling? As parents we have a (sometimes) underutilized tool that can help us in these situations: play. In this episode Katelin walks through how to use role playing specifically to help work through these situations with our children of all ages.
Related Episodes
Books & Articles Mentioned
Playful Parenting // Lawrence Cohen
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
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This podcast is my happy place
I am SO grateful for the time and effort that goes into this podcast. Every episode is packed with gold. There is so much education and real conversations about life and motherhood. It helps to calm my soul, reassure me, motivate me and so much more. THANK YOU!
242 // A Balm for Summer Burnout
Summer is half over and with all the fun comes exhaustion and overwhelm. In this episode, we address the concept of summer burnout, which can be applied to really any season of life. This episode was inspired by a voice message we received from one of our fabulous listeners. If you’d like to send us a question in the form of a voice message, just click here.Related Episodes
Authoritative Parenting / Arguably the MOST Effective Parenting Style
Discovering YOUR Life Essentials
Solitude Through Digital Minimalism
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
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REVIEW OF THE WEEK:
-Mandy Schuh
I have listened to this podcast for years, it is hands down my favorite podcast! It is insightful, fun and full of great ideas. I feel like I have made a friend in Felica. I appreciate the realness from these ladies and within Find The Magic. Thank you for being a breath of fresh air!
Still My Favorite!
241 // How Delight Enhances Our Ability to Be Present
Stuck in a rut? Are you feeling tired or disenchanted with your life or easily frustrated with your kids? Our days are made up of small moments, small seemingly insignificant moments that add up to our lives. Are we racing through or are we practicing presence and engaging with our day day? Inspired by Ross Gay on We can do hard things; this episode we share how finding small delights each day has inspired us to be more present for ourselves, our loved ones and especially in parenting. Related Episodes
Four Pillars of Wholehearted Parenting We Apply to Any Problem
Links We Mentioned
Start a Daily Delight Practice With Abby, Glennon, and Amanda!
The Artist’s Way // Julia Cameron
We can do hard things Start a Daily Delight Practice with Abby, Glennon & Amanda!
240// Parenting While Healing Trauma, Navigating Name Calling, Spitting and Punishments
We all have negative experiences that impact our mental state day to day as we parent. It can be exhausting and disheartening to attempt to parent in this state of distress. Today we tackle a listener question on parenting while healing past trauma and parenting. We also hear from a listener seeking advice about her children's name calling, spitting and general boundary pushing.
Book Mentioned:
How to do the Work // Nicole LePera
Related Episodes
Morning Routines for a 30 day transformation
How To: Create Pockets of Peace
Time Stamps
14:00 - How to deal with trauma and parent
15:58 - Big T vs little t trauma
16:30 - Repressed trauma
17:40 - Adult trauma
19:07 - Therapy is a major tool
22:00 - Give yourself extra grace and self care
24:01 - Name your trauma
31:00 - 90 second rule with stress/anxiety
34:57 - How to handle kids being unkind
38:30 - This too shall pass
42:00 - Name calling is a hard no
46:40 - A family is a good testing ground for kids to figure out social interactions
49:39 - Foster positive interactions to start a positive momentum
53:35 - Honey vs. Vinegar analogy
54:52 - Give yourself self-care so you can be your best
1:01:00 - Laughter is a pressure relief valve
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
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Local1st 02/10/2023
Most helpful podcast
I listen to a lot of parenting podcasts, this one is my favorite! So many topics covered and ideas discussed. I always seem to get so much out of listening. Thank you!
239// Guiding Your Family to Homeostasis Magic Moment
Who doesn't want peace and homeostasis in the family environment? So often we can get to a place of chaos; where our homes and families feel out of sorts. In this episode Felica shares her experience of stripping away outside influence with their cross country move and how it affected her family environment. She shares tips on applying her learning to your home. She also explains how she felt the anxious buzzing energy in her home, recognized it, and found some settling. Hint hint, it always starts with us!
Related Episodes
Guidance for the Changing seasons of Motherhood
Time Stamps
1:52 - Recognizing something is out of whack
4:00 - Our inner landscapes reflect onto our outer landscape --Focus on yourself
6:45 - Find support from others
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
MaryHag
11/08/2022
The highlight of my week🙏🏻
Updating my review since I have been listening now for a couple of years. Honestly, this podcast is a game changer and life changer for me, and truly a highlight of my week. I eagerly go onto my podcast app each week to refresh and pray for a new episode to be ready on my Tuesday morning walk. This podcast has helped me through so many challenges in parenting and in life, and I feel like I have been growing right alongside you incredible women for the last couple of years. I appreciate your authenticity and being real with us, approaching each new episode and book with such an openness and sense of curiosity and your clear passion for sharing the tools you discover with us. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for doing what you do - now please don’t stop because I’m about to have child number 2 and I need y’all!!
238// Unearthing Our Ego with The Enneagram
The Enneagram is a system of personality typing that describes patterns in how people interpret the world and manage their emotions. It unpacks the intention by with we interact with others and make the choices we make. In this episode we unpack our Enneagram types and discuss how they helped us unearth shadow sides of our egos that were limiting us or helped us see ourselves and our relationships in a new light. The Enneagram is a multi-faceted tool that can make us aware of who we are and how to work with our strengths and also help us determine weaknesses we may seek to change. In this episode, we use it to help us explore our own personalities and share how knowing ourselves has helped us capitalize on our strengths and understand and work with our weaknesses.
Books and Links We Mentioned:
Road Back to You // Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stable
Dr. Nicole LePera // the.holistic.psychologist
Time Stamps
Related Episodes
Building Bridges Back Home to Ourselves
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
Review of the week:
Unicorns are Real
I have loved and listened to "Find the Magic" for years of motherhood. So many of those years I would listen to Taralyn or Felicia talk about reframing and even enjoying the mundane tasks (like changing diapers) and to dos that normally are mindless. They talked about enjoying these things, creating connection in them. Every week I tuned in but honestly, I didn't believe it. I said things like, "I can't be that mom, that isn't working for MY children, these women are just UNICORNS. And every episode I would still plug in my headphones and listen along and wish I could get there, be that mom. Then something switched, last year I went on (my first ever) solo retreat to South America. It was a women's empowerment, yoga, surf trip but a switch flipped and I started doing the work on myself. I continued taking steps like FINALLY starting a miracle morning routine (for me!) and guess what? Things started clicking with my kids, and at home. So if you are able, start with yourself. I was convinced that to be a good mom I had to read all the parenting books, listen to all the podcasts, plan all the activities but that is so far from reality. Start with your Self! So grateful to Find The Magic, To Taralyn, Felicia and Katelin... Thank you!
237 // Our Thoughts Create Our World
In our lives there are things that we control, things we influence, and things we have no control over. In today's episode, Katelin explores one thing that is entirely within our control: our thoughts. Our thoughts have power over the way we see and subsequently engage with our world. She discusses tips and tools, including the work by Byron Katie, for how to change our thoughts, which will ultimately change our reality.
Related Episodes
The Power of being present NOW
Books & Links Mentioned
How Your Thinking Creates Your Reality // Jennice Vilhauer Ph.D.
Can You Affect Another Person's Behavior With Your Thoughts?
The Power of Now // Eckhart Tolle
Time Stamps
1:14 - Three buckets in life
2:32 - Our thoughts are within our control
4:30 - How thoughts become belief and how that primes our brains
7:45 - Beware of labeling our children – “terrible twos” “threenager”
10:25 - Experiment on labeling “smart” and “dumb” rats
13:51 - Step 1 is becoming aware of your thoughts are your thoughts
15:12 - Step 2 create what you want to see
16:50 - Step 3 - visualize every step and the end
17:25 - step 4 - invite God into this process
18:30 - Using the work by Byron Katie as a tool to unstick thoughts
21:15 - Example of navigating sharing holiday time with families
28:40 - Turning around your belief statement
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
MaryHag
11/08/2022
The highlight of my week🙏🏻
Updating my review since I have been listening now for a couple of years. Honestly, this podcast is a game changer and life changer for me, and truly a highlight of my week. I eagerly go onto my podcast app each week to refresh and pray for a new episode to be ready on my Tuesday morning walk. This podcast has helped me through so many challenges in parenting and in life, and I feel like I have been growing right alongside you incredible women for the last couple of years. I appreciate your authenticity and being real with us, approaching each new episode and book with such an openness and sense of curiosity and your clear passion for sharing the tools you discover with us. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for doing what you do - now please don’t stop because I’m about to have child number 2 and I need y’all!! 😝😘
236 // Systems and Values for Easier Days and Stronger Family Connections (Entitlement Trap by Linda Eyre and Richard Eyre) {Best of}
We discuss the systems that we have tried out in our own homes over the years that have proven themselves to be priceless.
Books we mentioned:
The Entitlement Trap
Secrets of a Happy Family
Hold on to Your Kids
Miracle Morning
Links We Promised
Serendipity Parenting Episode from Linda an Richard Eyre
Related Episodes
Discovering Your Life Essentials
How To: Create Pockets of Peace
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
MaryHag
11/08/2022
The highlight of my week🙏🏻
Updating my review since I have been listening now for a couple of years. Honestly, this podcast is a game changer and life changer for me, and truly a highlight of my week. I eagerly go onto my podcast app each week to refresh and pray for a new episode to be ready on my Tuesday morning walk. This podcast has helped me through so many challenges in parenting and in life, and I feel like I have been growing right alongside you incredible women for the last couple of years. I appreciate your authenticity and being real with us, approaching each new episode and book with such an openness and sense of curiosity and your clear passion for sharing the tools you discover with us. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for doing what you do - now please don’t stop because I’m about to have child number 2 and I need y’all!! 😝😘
235 // The Kids Are Home For the Summer, Now What? {Best Of}
In a few weeks our kids will be home for the summer, and our daily schedules will change drastically. A lot of jokes, angst and dread can surround this time of year. Let’s start as we mean to go on! In this episode, we are sharing some of our favorite tips for designing our summer. We touch on creating and setting boundaries from the start, letting our kids be and resisting screen entertaining. If we have learned anything this year, it is that being fluid and available for change can help us live in the present and create a calm atmosphere in our homes. As we let them be free to work through the B word (boredom!) we will come out the other side with having enjoyed our summer together!
Related Episodes
How to: Create Pockets of Peace
HOW TO Parent Less and Love it More
The Martyr Effect. HOW TO Stop Offering Ourselves at the Altar of Parenting
Interview with Dr. Mary Wilde: How to Joyfully Ride the Waves of Parenthood Without Drowning in Them
Encouraging Independent Play and Letting Go of Guilt
Time Stamps
10:00 - Summer bucket list
11:56 - Beware of over scheduling
17:00 - It's not our job as a parent to entertain our kids
20:45 - Importance of completing your essentials during the summer
22:27 - Consider eliminating screens
23:41 - Embrace boredom
27:23 - Give them a chore if they are bored
29:11 - The moment of "reaching" when we slow down
34:20 - Remind them to clean up
35:15 - Take the time to teach them more household skills during the summer
36:00 - Open the buffet
39:00 - Set the expectation & infrastructure at the beginning
45:34 - Verbally state your expectations
46:01 - Let go of control
47:31 - Children can contribute to the family
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
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Hit SEND
234 // Magic Moment: In Defense of Books By Taralyn
We LOVE books. One of the casualties of our current age and our screen adapted/crippled attention spans is that we don’t read as much anymore. In this magic moment, Taralyn gives her best persuasion for reading and gives lots of easy tips to keep or acquire the habit of reading in your life. People ask us all the time how we read so many books, and she tells the secret to our habits:)
Books and Links We Mentioned:
Women Who Run With Wolves // Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph.D
The Gift // Hafiz
You Can Heal Your Life // Louise Hay
Related Episodes
Book Club Recommendations for 2020
Finding Motivation to Claim Your Personal Power Hour
Make Your Morning Routine Happen!
Morning Routines for a 30 Day Transformation with Taralyn
Hone Your Morning Routine with Felica
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
Review of the week:
I have loved and listened to "Find the Magic" for years of motherhood. So many of those years I would listen to Taralyn or Felicia talk about reframing and even enjoying the mundane tasks (like changing diapers) and to dos that normally are mindless. They talked about enjoying these things, creating connection in them. Every week I tuned in but honestly, I didn't believe it. I said things like, "I can't be that mom, that isn't working for MY children, these women are just UNICORNS. And every episode I would still plug in my headphones and listen along and wish I could get there, be that mom. Then something switched, last year I went on (my first ever) solo retreat to South America. It was a women's empowerment, yoga, surf trip but a switch flipped and I started doing the work on myself. I continued taking steps like FINALLY starting a miracle morning routine (for me!) and guess what? Things started clicking with my kids, and at home. So if you are able, start with yourself. I was convinced that to be a good mom I had to read all the parenting books, listen to all the podcasts, plan all the activities but that is so far from reality. Start with your Self! So grateful to Find The Magic, To Taralyn, Felicia and Katelin... Thank you!
233 // Building Bridges Back Home to Ourselves with Tessa Brown
We have all been here; there are times in life of discontent, resentment, perhaps even depression and often these coincide with a forgetting of ourselves. In this episode Felica interviews Tessa Brown, an artist and writer who focuses her work on womanhood and feminine energy and happens to be Felica's dear friend.
They dive into reclaiming our younger selves and the decisions we made, wrestling with motherhood and its expectations as well as considering how we can build bridges to parts of our lives that we want to include and ask the right questions to determine what things we should leave behind.
Time Stamps
3:30 - What do we say yes to?
6:45 - How did past selves make decisions for our future?
14:35 - What is the right question to ask
18:00 - The power of manifestation
22:30 - Not merge with collective
24:05 - I get to decide who comes onto the island
25:25 - Do I want this life?
Related Episodes
Living Life Untamed and Releasing Others to do the Same (Untamed by Glennon Doyle)
EP 99 HOW TO OWN YOUR OWN DESIRES AND THE ART OF INTIMACY WITH DR. JENNIFER FINLAYSON-FIFE
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
Review of the week:
she.will.be.katie
11/07/2022
Absolute favorite
This is the only podcast that I cannot wait for the new release each week. There’s so much to contemplate in each episode. Yet at the same time its easy enough to digest that, even when my mom brain is at an all time high, I finish each episode inspired. Thank you 💛
232 // When You Feel Like You're Drowning and Siblings Won't Stop Fighting
In today’s episode we talk about how to deal with your children squabbling repeatedly and what to do when you feel like you just can’t get it together.
Time Stamps
13:42 - How to help our kids have a positive sibling relationship
19:17 - Sibling situation is working out a social dynamic for the real world
21:50 - We learn in families how to read people
21:21 - Emotional Preparing
25:00 - Code words
27:30 - Beware of comparison
31:48 - I feel like I’m drowning
37:43 - Life is a balancing act
40:40 - Be kind to yourself and others
Books & Related Episodes
How to do the work // Nicole Le Pera
HOW TO Prepare Children for a New Sibling: a Conversation with Upbringing
Understanding Praise and How We Can Use It to Give Our Kids Confidence Instead of Insecurity
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Review of the week:
Good for dads too!
As a father of two grown children and now taking care of my 16 year old nephew along with my wife, I still find lots of great tips and inspiration from these three amazing humans. I love the “high 5” and “facepalm” stories and the podcast is a soothing way to start a day or listen to in the drive home after a busy day at work. I wish I had something like this when my kids were younger as I think back to some situations I could have handled better. Thank you Find the Magic for all the times you made me smile, laugh, think and grow as a parent.
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app Scroll to the bottom of the pageClick on write a reviewTap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
231// Pt 2 Be the Calm Your Kids Need, Talking Less and Reducing Anger // Michaeleen Doucleff Hunter Gather Parent
Some parenting wisdom feels true to our core; that is how we felt when we read much of the wisdom from Hunter Gather Parent by Michaleen Doucleff. Today we are sharing our favorite nuggets from the book pertaining to disciplining our kids. The advice is less prescriptive and more in line with what we know to be true as parents and humans. Our children are learning. Our role is to see them with love and respect and teach them the ways of their family tribe. We tackle how to direct our kids with less force, create cooperation, and reduce the amount of anger in our homes.
Find part one of our conversation here -
Books, Quotes, & Links Mentioned
Understanding Praise and How We Can Use It to Give Our Kids Confidence Instead of Insecurity
“When little people are overwhelmed by big emotions, it's our job to share our calm, not join their chaos.”― L.R. Knost
Time Stamps
7:15 - Premise of Hunter, Gather, Parent
9:50 - 100 commands vs. 3 commands per hour
12:00 - A request is giving our kids the chance to obey or rebel
14:30 - Master the facial expressions and gestures
15:11 - Ask 3 times calmly
18:59 - Parent is the pole analogy
22:11 - Don’t talk for your kids
25:17 - At intersecting points, redirect your kids to the family
27:58 - Misbehavior is a call for responsibility & freedom
29:00 - Our work is their play
32:15 - We can infuse connection into our daily chores
35:35 - Never in anger
39:19 - Take a breath & say nothing when feeling angry
41:10 - Yelling trains our kids not to listen
43:15 - When we respond with kindness & quiet, we teach them to do the same
48:13 - How we see our kids is changes how we act towards them
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
We LOVE devices that help our kids stay safe and be able to adventure while still being able to contact us safely and allow us to know where they are without being the kind of technology that steals their mental health and attention. Gabb wireless is an incredible company that we FULLY endorse for just that. Go to https://gabbwireless.com and use code FINDTHEMAGIC to get $50 off any device!
Thank you for the kind reviews! We appreciate them so much. Here is how to leave a review for us on iTunes:
Open Find the Magic in the podcast app
Scroll to the bottom of the page
Click on write a review
Tap the stars to rate us and then write us some feedback:)
Review of the week:
Cherise L&D nurse, 03/15/2023
I just want to take the time to thank you for being such a positive change in my life. I started listening to you guys while I was in nursing school back in 2020. Your very first podcast on morning routines changed my life forever. I then purchased “Miracle Morning” and have lived by this since then. I wake up every morning, oil pull, set my diffusers, do yoga, sip on tea, and if I have time run with my dog (I even make sure to do this on my work days). Being a busy mom of 2 kids ages 7 and 4 that I partially homeschool (they’re also in a homeschool co op), wife, and a nurse, I can’t thank you ladies enough. Your podcasts help center myself as a parent. It’s so easy to get caught up in the day to day busy lifestyle, and when I do find that happening, I pop my ear buds in and go on a run and listen to you ladies. I tell every single mom about your podcast. You have made such a positive change for my family. I truly can’t even begin to tell you how much gratitude I have for your show.
Thank you,
Cherise
230 // Pt 1: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans // Michaeleen Doucleff
"My kids never help", "It's like pulling teeth", "Our family life feels disconnected", "They don't care about me or what I do for them"; frustration over the lack of help in our homes from our children can send us into a spiral of hard days. The sentiment that "kids will be kids" and we need to cater to their whims can topple the structure of our families. In this episode, with the help of Hunter, Gather, Parent by Michaleen Doucleff, we are going to challenge the Western assumptions we all hold about parenting to bring a breath of fresh air and an ease to our parenting that just may revolutionize the way you think about your home environment!
Time Stamps
8:00 - Intro to Hunter, Gather, Parent
10:13 - The silo parenting present in western culture (WEIRD)
15:51 - The drive to help and belong is naturally present in our kids from the beginning
20:30 - In the long run, forcing your kids is detrimental
21:30 - Example of five year old girl from the Nani Gandi Tribe
23:00 - Never force a kid to stay and work
25:00 - Less praise, more acknowledgement
26:38 - Independence vs. Autonomy
30:01 - “We clean it up” vs. “You clean it up”
34:15 - Example of autonomy the Hadzabe community
41:05 - Chore charts and how they work against intrinsic motivation
Related Episodes
How To: Create Pockets of Peace
Books Mentioned:
How to Raise Kind Kids // Thomas Lickona
Sponsor:
GABB WIRELESS
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Review of the week:
AngelinaEM
04/12/2023
My new best friends.
I am a busy mom of 4 (7 yo and under) and Find the Magic is something that I do for myself. I connect with these women SO well and they make me feel like I’m doing the best job, even when I feel like I’m not. Thank you ladies for being here for us mothers. ♥️