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Foundation Father

Foundation Father

By Matt

Become a better father. A podcast about fatherhood, leadership at home, ancient wisdom, educating our children, and masculinity. Build a foundation for your great-great-grandchildren foundationfather.com
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Mimic Your Child’s Excitement

Foundation FatherAug 18, 2022

00:00
01:29
Mimic Your Child’s Excitement

Mimic Your Child’s Excitement

Your children approach you over and over to show you something. They are proud. They are excited. They want to share these emotions with you.

So get excited for them.

Aug 18, 202201:29
Helping Your Children Face Their Fears

Helping Your Children Face Their Fears

We have to help our kids face their fears while they are in the controlled environment of our home. We do them no favors if we let them wallow in timidity.

Aug 11, 202201:49
The Reality of a Child’s Imagination

The Reality of a Child’s Imagination

Evil rises and good is defeated. Epics are written in a moment, acted out with vitality, and then forgotten every single day.

Aug 01, 202202:05
Don't Raise a Bubble Boy - Deflate the Bubble

Don't Raise a Bubble Boy - Deflate the Bubble

You can’t let your kids live in a bubble. Eventually, it will be popped by something beyond your control and they will have to deal with the outside world. If your children need to walk around with a fainting couch, just in case they hear someone use a bad word, you have failed as a parent.

Better to introduce the outside world to them on your own terms. This takes discipline, wisdom, and patience. Not easy, but doable, as long as you don’t mind doing it imperfectly.

Jul 28, 202203:22
Fix Your Own Face

Fix Your Own Face

Being a man means doing the right thing even when you don’t feel like it. Even when you know you will suffer. 

And not complaining about it.

Jun 09, 202201:26
Be Like the Unicorn

Be Like the Unicorn

You should be able to have a conversation with anybody. If you think you are high above a certain class of people, or that you think thoughts too grave and mighty for the peasants, you’ll come off as an insufferable boor.

Jun 02, 202202:14
Just Say “Yes”

Just Say “Yes”

“Yes” should be your default answer whenever your children ask you to do something.

As I look back on the times I have said “yes,” I realize I have never regretted saying “yes.”

May 12, 202202:04
Echoes of Your Own Words

Echoes of Your Own Words

Children learn to speak to themselves based on how their parents speak to them. They are mimickers.

Their thoughts will be echoes of your own words.

May 05, 202201:38
Boys and the Dangers of Homeschooling

Boys and the Dangers of Homeschooling

There is no better environment than homeschooling to tailor the education of your children to their specific needs.

But...

There might be a reason to send your boys to public school. Eventually. This has to do with the differences in how you treat boys and girls.


Apr 21, 202203:08
Be Thankful

Be Thankful

We are so busy doing things for our children that we risk never stopping to recognize what they are doing for us.

They are a gift.

Mar 31, 202201:30
When Apathy Leads to Anger

When Apathy Leads to Anger

If you are getting angry at your children, it’s your fault. Every time. 

All of the time.

Mar 24, 202201:42
10 Ways to Destroy the Imagination of Your Children - Part 2
Mar 17, 202204:29
10 Ways to Destroy the Imagination of Your Children - Part 1
Mar 10, 202204:21
Pulling a Solomon

Pulling a Solomon

This is the most important thing we can learn from Solomon: his humility. Without that, we will never be able to do justice.

Feb 03, 202202:23
Do or Die Moments

Do or Die Moments

Every boy needs a “do or die” moment to consider himself a man. His confidence depends upon it. It doesn’t have to be drastic. It doesn’t have to be literally life or death.

But there needs to be some risk. Some serious consequences for failure.

Jan 27, 202202:22
Book Recommendations from 2021

Book Recommendations from 2021

I read over 50 books last year.

These are the 7 you should read this year.

Jan 20, 202204:40
A Garden Untended is Not a Garden

A Garden Untended is Not a Garden

Many fathers don’t tend to the garden of their family and then get mad when it doesn’t bear any fruit. Years of neglect, and they are surprised at the thorns and thistles that greet them.

Jan 06, 202201:42
What to Do When Your Kids Won’t Answer Questions

What to Do When Your Kids Won’t Answer Questions

Whenever we ask our kids a question, whenever we try to get them to open up, there are two dreaded responses:

  • Silence
  • “I don’t know.”

When this keeps happening, we should first check that we aren’t asking boring questions. Or that we are asking questions that deserve to be asked. They need to be worth the effort and breath we are expending.

But sometimes, kids just need a primer.

Dec 23, 202101:59
They Might as Well be Orphans

They Might as Well be Orphans

You can tell when a little boy has had no masculine influence in his life. When I take my kids to parks that contain lots of other children, these emasculated boys stick out like a tone-deaf singer in a choir.

They might as well be orphans. They are desperate for a father. They’ll take a fake one. Anything.

Dec 16, 202103:05
The Lowest Stakes Imaginable

The Lowest Stakes Imaginable

And this is what childhood is all about. Learning to make the right decisions when the stakes are small, the risks are minimal, and the consequences minor.

Dec 09, 202101:51
Don’t Assume They Know

Don’t Assume They Know

When we teach them something, we are coming from a position of experience and knowledge. It’s hard to go back to the beginner’s mind and speak from foundational principles. What words do we need to define? What concepts do we need to elaborate on?

Nov 23, 202101:47
Require Excellence

Require Excellence

As your children grow and you begin to give them jobs, you will quickly find yourself in several predicaments.

And you must require excellence. This episode goes over several reasons why a child might be do something with excellence and the different responses a father should have.

Nov 09, 202103:19
Listen to Both Sides

Listen to Both Sides

Never reward the first one to come yelling to you for help without having a firm understanding of the situation.

There are no easy answers here. But if both sides feel they have been listened to, things usually go better, no matter what your decision.

Oct 12, 202103:13
How to Homeschool Your Kids in Under 2 Hours per Day

How to Homeschool Your Kids in Under 2 Hours per Day

The book has been launched. This is a free preview.

Buy it at https://foundationfather.gumroad.com/l/hSKHP

Oct 04, 202101:44
Admit Your Fears

Admit Your Fears

Admit your own fears, and your kids will trust you to help them deal with theirs.

Sep 16, 202102:21
What Makes a Good Friend

What Makes a Good Friend

While there are many attributes that a “good friend” will have, there is one that is critical.

A lack of envy.

Agamemnon gives a clarifying speech about so-called friends.

Sep 09, 202102:45
7 Ways to Cultivate Gravitas

7 Ways to Cultivate Gravitas

Gravitas means you have weight. People tend to conflate it with somberness and over-seriousness, but the men who have the most gravitas usually have an equal amount of charisma.

But true fathers have gravitas. They have a weight that attracts and influences. If you want to have influence on your children, and on others around you (including young men who are looking for good models of fatherhood), then you need to cultivate and promote your own gravitas.

Sep 02, 202102:59
Stay Married

Stay Married

Good fathers are good husbands.

How you treat your wife will be mimicked by your boys and expected by your girls.

At a minimum, this means you should stay married. It is one of the most important things you can do as a father.

Aug 30, 202103:42
Nate Dean - Life Insurance & Generational Wealth

Nate Dean - Life Insurance & Generational Wealth

Nate Dean is the co-founder of Unlimited Life Concepts. He does financial coaching and mentoring, helping people build up wealth while they start to erase their bad debt.

I consider myself pretty good with finances, but Nate has taught me some things that completely blew my mind.

  • How to be your own bank
  • Leveraging loans that you make to yourself
  • Making every dollar that comes in earn you more money
  • Grow your wealth tax-free, without an IRA

You don't want to miss this one.

*None of the info in this podcast should be considered financial advice.

Aug 24, 202101:04:19
Earning Respect From Other Men

Earning Respect From Other Men

You aren’t owed respect. You have to earn it.

If you want to be treated like a man, you have to act like a man. This means taking on responsibility without grumbling or complaining.

Aug 19, 202102:12
Killing Envy in Your Children

Killing Envy in Your Children

If not kept in check, envy will destroy relationships.

It can also twist a person’s affections beyond recognition, making them chase things they don’t even care about.

Here are 4 ways to kill envy.

Aug 10, 202103:50
Don’t Make Your Daughter Beg for Attention

Don’t Make Your Daughter Beg for Attention

If you have sons but only one daughter, you can inadvertently cause her to beg for your attention. Even if it is an accident, you are responsible.

Don’t start relating to your daughter as if she is one of your sons. This can lead to resentment and insecurity. Be intentional about relating to her as your daughter.

Here's how.

Aug 05, 202102:19
Limiting the Freedom of Teenagers

Limiting the Freedom of Teenagers

We get a lot of things backward. With children, we must move from strict to permissive. Not permissive to strict.

When your child becomes a teenager, you want to start giving them more freedom and more responsibility. You want them to start exercising more self-control.

Aug 02, 202104:41
How to Protect Your Daughter from Insecurity

How to Protect Your Daughter from Insecurity

A girl craves male attention and validation. She seeks it out. She desires it most from her father, and a good father will provide that attention and validation.

Let’s walk through a common scenario that plays out day after day, time and again, in homes across the world, and how it leads to broken, insecure women.

Jul 29, 202103:51
Focus on Your Future Grandchildren

Focus on Your Future Grandchildren

It is not enough to think about the future of your children. If you are not at least thinking about what you will leave your grandchildren, you are not thinking long-term enough.

It is a poor legacy indeed that only lasts a single generation.

Jul 26, 202102:40
Respecting the Strength of Her Brothers

Respecting the Strength of Her Brothers

Prepare your daughters to respect the strength of your sons. She should treat their potential strength as actual strength.

Don’t put your daughters in a position where they are naive about the strength of men and the respect it deserves.

Jul 22, 202102:58
The Best Habit to Build as a Father

The Best Habit to Build as a Father

Reading to your kids every night is one of the best habits to have.

Start immediately after they are born, before they can hold their head up, before they can crawl, before they can read. The earlier the better.

Tips to get started and some book recommendations.

Jul 15, 202103:31
Choosing Your Wife Everday

Choosing Your Wife Everday

Marriage is not choosing your wife.  It's choosing your wife every day.

What your wife wants is for you to have lots of other options…and then choose her, no matter what. To choose her every day. To come home every day.

She chose you when you were still a boy.

Choose her after you have become a man.

Jul 12, 202102:13
King David - The Quit Porn Strategist
Jul 07, 202101:05:14
Growing Generational Wealth
Jul 01, 202104:36
The Secret to Making Your Wife More Beautiful (Overnight)

The Secret to Making Your Wife More Beautiful (Overnight)

If you could instantly make your wife more beautiful overnight, would you do it?

It's in your power.

Jun 28, 202106:45
Love is not Inclusive

Love is not Inclusive

Love creates boundaries. It sets up exclusionary relationships.

Those you love have a claim on your time. They have a claim on your attention. They have a claim on your strength and treasure.

Jun 24, 202102:07
Ask Them to Teach

Ask Them to Teach

Are you having problems connecting with your children?

Ask them to teach you something.

If you ask them to teach you about something they love, they will not shut up about it. You will be drinking from the firehose.

Jun 22, 202103:30
Replace a “No” with a “Yes”

Replace a “No” with a “Yes”

You will be forced to say “no” to your children for various reasons.

But that doesn’t mean you can’t give them something else.

Jun 17, 202101:14
Chores and Money, Identity and Obligation

Chores and Money, Identity and Obligation

A family is about a shared identity. It runs on something more important than money: shared obligations and responsibilities.

Your children should learn to fulfill their obligations without expecting any kind of monetary reward. Just like their father. Just like their mother.

Jun 14, 202102:11
Basic Financial Education for Your Children

Basic Financial Education for Your Children

You can start the financial education of your children early. And the earlier the better. It doesn’t have to be elaborate.

Jun 10, 202104:12
Make Home Economics Redundant

Make Home Economics Redundant

How far our households have fallen. The word “economics” now needs the qualifier of “home” to have any semblance of its original source, despite having the meaning of “home” in the word itself!

Modern households have become places of personal fulfillment and entertainment. They used to be the core productive unit of society.

Jun 07, 202102:05
Mothers do not Know How to Attract Women

Mothers do not Know How to Attract Women

Boys should not learn how to attract women from their mother.

It’s like asking for a recipe and getting all of the measurements but with no ingredient names. Meaningless.

Fathers should take the lead on this. Which means they need to know what to teach and how to teach it.

Jun 02, 202104:06
Reclaiming Authority as a Husband and Father

Reclaiming Authority as a Husband and Father

You are a husband and a father. You have been invested with real authority and you don’t want to squander it anymore.

You want to change.

You want to lead. Like you are supposed to.

How do you do that?

Start small.

May 27, 202104:01
House Rules vs. Universal Rules

House Rules vs. Universal Rules

Universal rules never change. House rules can vary from house to house, from town to town.

House rules are important. They will be part of what makes your family different, what defines its culture, and what helps form a legacy.

But remember to never conflate house rules with universal rules. Equating them does not elevate your house rules. It only lessens the universal rules in the eyes of your children. It drags them down.

May 24, 202103:20