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From Crisis to Connection - with Geoff Steurer

From Crisis to Connection - with Geoff Steurer

By From Crisis to Connection
The goal of healing from sexual betrayal isn't just stopping the crisis. It's ultimately moving into genuine and meaningful connection with ourselves, each other, and the world around us. Join licensed therapist and author Geoff Steurer as he interviews experts and other guests about how to move out of the crisis of sexual betrayal (affairs, sexual addiction, pornography addiction) and toward connection. The information in these interviews transcends religious and cultural lines, as we all seek the same healing power of connection.
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Going to the source of the problem - Sam Tielemans (Part 1) - Episode 141
It is human nature to bypass the root of our problems and instead focus on fixing or changing our behaviors. However, the behavior is usually a coping mechanism for something deeper. Today I am joined by Sam Tielemans to discuss the importance of addressing the core problem, and separating our identity from our behaviors. In this episode we cover: Why do we usually only focus on stopping the problem behaviors? What else should be the focus leading up to the problematic behavior? Join us next week as we continue the discussion with Sam on accessing this information in a helpful way that fosters long-term healing and recovery. Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer: I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Sam Tielemans: Sam Tielemans is a licensed marriage and family therapist that specializes in helping couples overcome the effect of unhealthy porn use in their relationship. He has a private practice in Las Vegas, and after working with couples for over a decade, he has developed an approach to help couples restore their marriage, rebuild trust, and improve their sexual intimacy after betrayal. www.coupleshealing.org Podcast: Couples Healing from Pornography Addiction Email: sam@healingcouples.org
21:19
May 19, 2022
Owning your recovery - Tim’s story - Episode 140
Today I am joined by Tim, a fellow marriage and family therapist, who shares his story of pornography addiction and his recent road to recovery. He shares the tools and resources that he has used to break cycles, stay accountable to himself, and move forward on a path of healing. In this episode we cover: Tim’s story with multiple crossroads The word “addict” and how it can be shameful Recovery vs. sobriety Inner peace/connectedness Becoming authentic vs. white knuckling Being in recovery for YOU If you are hiding things from your spouse, it will come out You are not alone Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer: I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children.
50:54
May 12, 2022
Sexual healing from sexual abuse - Wendy Maltz - Episode 139
The statistics of sexual abuse are staggering. If you haven’t been sexually abused, you probably know someone who has been. Internationally recognized sex therapist, Wendy Maltz, joins us today to discuss the importance of sexual healing after sexual abuse. In this episode we cover: What are the sexual problems resulting from sexual abuse? What is sexual healing? What are the common stages for healing from sexual abuse? How can a partner be a resource in the sexual healing journey? What if the partner is the one who caused or perpetuated the sexual abuse? What tools and resources are most effective in the sexual healing journey? Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer: I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Wendy Maltz: Wendy Maltz is an internationally recognized sex therapist, author, and speaker. Wendy has more than forty years of experience helping individuals and couples overcome sex and intimacy concerns. She is the author of numerous acclaimed sexuality resources, including the recovery classic, The Sexual Healing Journey: A Guide for Survivors of Sexual Abuse, as well as The Porn Trap: The Essential Guide to Overcoming Problems Caused by Pornography and Private Thoughts: Exploring the Power of Women’s Sexual Fantasies. Presently retired from providing counseling services, Wendy remains engaged in the field through her popular educational website,www.HealthySex.com, which provides free articles, podcast interviews, posters, videos, and more to help people overcome sexual problems and develop skills for love-based sexual intimacy. https://healthysex.com/self-help-articles/sexual-healing-from-sexual-abuse/
44:47
May 05, 2022
A better way to approach sexual brokenness in our churches - Daniel Weiss - Episode 138
Although church is a place for imperfect people to go to become better, sometimes we find it hard to be accepted there through our own trials and imperfections, especially in the case of sexual brokenness. Today Daniel Weiss joins us to discuss how clergy and members of congregations can better approach this struggle and come together to help foster healing and acceptance. In this episode we cover: What do you see as God's design for healthy sexuality? How is this being distorted culturally? What do you mean when you say we're all sexually broken? How do you see us responding to this in unhealthy ways? What are the healthiest ways to respond to our own and other's sexual brokenness? How can we talk about sexual brokenness without inducing unhealthy levels of shame? How are you helping clergy teach and minister around these sensitive topics? Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer: I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Daniel Weiss: Daniel Weiss is the executive director of the Sexual Integrity Leadership Summit, which equips, supports, and collaborates with Christian leaders to promote Gospel-centered sexuality in the Church. Daniel has a passion for the sexually broken and the need for pastors, parents, and Christian leaders to respond with courage, compassion, and truth to the sexual challenges of our age. He is also a coauthor of Treading Boldly Through a Pornographic World: A Field Guide for Parents. In addition to his professional work, Daniel and his wife work daily to create a home of faith, forgiveness, laughter, and love in the Wisconsin countryside where they live with their five children. Www.SexualIntegrityLeaders.com Www.BrushfiresFoundation.org Coauthor of Treading Boldly through a Pornographic World: A Field Guide for Parents
51:38
April 28, 2022
Healing shame in recovery - Sathiya Sam - Episode 137
Shame is one of the biggest obstacles in facing and overcoming any addiction, especially a pornography addiction. Sathiya Sam joins me to discuss methods to tackle crippling shame, and how to live with confidence and integrity after overcoming addiction. In this episode we discuss: Can you define shame and how it impacts us when we struggle with unwanted sexual behaviors? Why is shame so difficult to overcome? What are the ways that we usually try to overcome it (that don't work)? How can we leave shame in the past without feeling worse about ourselves? Can you describe the "Triple Threat?" Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer: I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Sathiya Sam: Sathiya is a coach and speaker that helps men live with confidence and integrity. A recovered addict himself, Sathiya is the creator of DeepCleanTM – a research-based and Bible-backed system for overcoming porn addiction. DeepCleanTM has helped everyone from college students to medical doctors regain control of their lives and walk in greater levels of freedom. He is married to his lovely wife Shaloma and based out of Toronto, Canada. CLICK HERE to view the Deep Clean (TM) porn recovery program Website - www.sathiyasam.com Free Recovery Guide - www.ultimaterecoveryguide.com The Last Relapse (Book) - www.sathiyasam.com/books Unleash The Man Within Podcast - www.sathiyasam.com/podcast Facebook - www.facebook.com/sathiyamesam Instagram - www.instagram.com/sathiyamesam
42:21
April 21, 2022
Discovering your couples’ sexual style - Dr. Barry McCarthy - Episode 136
Dr. Barry McCarthy joins us today to dive into the very vulnerable topics of sex, eroticism, and intimacy between couples, and how they can contribute to the success or demise of committed relationships. In this episode we cover: Responsive sexual desire for men and women Valuing intimacy, pleasure, and eroticism Women and men as intimate and erotic allies Why the Best friend relational style and the Complementary Sexual Style is the best fit for most couples. What is variable, flexible couple sexuality and how does it help couples as they age? Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Dr. Barry McCarthy Barry McCarthy, Ph.D. is a professor of psychology at American University, a diplomate in clinical psychology, a certified sex therapist, and a certified couple therapist. He has published more than 110 professional articles, 29 book chapters, and 14 books. Barry has presented more than 450 professional workshops in the United States and internationally. In 2016 he received the Masters and Johnson award for lifetime contributions to the sexuality field. Website: https://mccarthyonsex.com Blog:https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-paradox-sex Books: Couple Sexuality After 60, Contemporary Male Sexuality, Rekindling (Desire 3rd Edition), Enhancing Couple Sexuality, Finding Your Sexual Voice
01:01:12
April 15, 2022
Deeper healing with breath work - Roxanne Granata - Episode 135
In the realm of healing, there isn’t a one size fits all approach. There are many different ways to access deep emotions and needs. One resource for healing is the cleansing method of breath work. Roxanne Granata joins us to explain this healing practice and how to access emotions stored deep within our gut as opposed to those in our minds. In this episode, we discuss: What exactly is breath work? How does it help all of us, especially those struggling with trauma/addiction? What is revelation breath work? Where does someone start with breathwork? Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer: I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Roxanne Granata: Hi All! I like to get super open because vulnerability fosters connection and there’s nothing better. You will find that in everything I do I share personal life experiences. With over 1,000 hours of study, counseling, mentor groups, and facilitating 12-step partner groups, I became a specialist in navigating through Betrayal trauma as well as guiding individuals and groups through discovering what’s holding them back from living their divine purpose and passion. My rock bottom point turned me into the Author of Cutting Ties – Healing Betrayal Trauma as the Spouse of an Addict. I’m the Host of the Choose In Podcast, Motivational Speaker with over 15 years of experience, and a personal Coach for those ready to uncover what is holding them back. I am here to guide you to see your reality with truth so you can choose healing and move forward in life becoming the best version of yourself. My passion is to walk beside you giving you a direction so you can go from, “I don’t know what to do”, to taking action and creating a life you love. I am here to help you! Let’s get started. https://www.roxannekennedygranata.com
43:17
April 08, 2022
Deeper healing with breath work - Roxanne Granata - Episode 135
In the realm of healing, there isn’t a one size fits all approach. There are many different methods to access deep emotions and needs. One resource for healing is the cleansing method of breath work. Roxanne Granata joins us to explain this healing practice and how to access emotions stored deep within our gut as opposed to those in our minds. In this episode, we discuss: What exactly is breath work? How does it help all of us, especially those struggling with trauma/addiction? What is revelation breath work? Where does someone start with breach work? Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer: I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Roxanne Granata: I like to get super open because vulnerability fosters connection and there’s nothing better. You will find that in everything I do I share personal life experiences. All of this came to be because I embarked on a journey of healing from betrayal trauma being the spouse (now ex) of an addict. I had some serious dedication, and somewhat perfectionism (which has now been addressed and continually being conquered) to find recovery. With over 1,000 hours of study, counseling, mentor groups, and facilitating 12-step partner groups, I became a specialist in navigating through Betrayal trauma as well as guiding individuals and groups through discovering what’s holding them back from living their divine purpose and passion. My rock bottom point turned me into the Author of Cutting Ties – Healing Betrayal Trauma as the Spouse of an Addict. I’m the Host of the Choose In Podcast, Motivational Speaker with over 15 years of experience, and a personal Coach for those ready to uncover what is holding them back. I am here to guide you to see your reality with truth so you can choose healing and move forward in life becoming the best version of yourself. I'm here to help you. Let's get started!  https://www.roxannekennedygranata.com/
43:17
April 07, 2022
What's hijacking so many beautiful relationships? - Dr. Jacob Hess - Episode 134
Dr. Jacob Hess wrote an article in Public Square magazine that challenged the belief that we should abandon marriage if we're not feeling romantic or loving feelings for our spouse. He said that many of these marriages are not only worth saving, but are completely able to be saved. We invited him to join us on the podcast to talk about his perspective on how most marriages can be healed, even when they have serious challenges. In this episode, we discuss: The origins of this article and why this topic matters so much to him How this applies to couples who have experienced serious attachment injuries What couples can do to practice love when they're on the brink of divorce CLICK HERE to receive your free copy of Jacob's book, "Once Upon a Time...He Wasn't Feeling it Anymore" Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Jacob Hess Jacob teaches Mindfulness-based Stress Reduction and has helped create mindfulness-based classes (Mindweather 101, Lift, Fortify) and the Council for Sustainable Healing. In addition to 14 peer-reviewed articles, Jacob has authored four books: You’re Not  as Crazy as I Thought, But You’re Still Wrong, Once Upon a Time…He Wasn’t Feeling It Anymore and A Third Space: Proposing Another Way Forward in the LGBT/Religious Conservative Impasse & The Power of Stillness:  Mindful Living for Latter-ay Saints. You can learn more about Jacob’s work at unthinkable.cc or contact him at jzhess@gmail.com.
53:05
March 31, 2022
Supporting our teens with screens, social media, and mental health - Smith Alley - Episode 133
Our children live in a wonderfully terrifying world of tech that can both build and destroy. It can feel overwhelming and exhausting to stay on top of all the changes and trust our kids are safe. We invited a teen who shares his journey from almost being destroyed by pornography, shame, and depression to now helping parents and teens understand how they can navigate this world safely. His name is Smith Alley and he's courageously stepping into the light to let others know healing is possible. In this episode, we discuss: Smith's story What it means to live life bigger What he want parents to know about the dangers of pornography, tech, and social media How parents can help their kids navigate today's tech challenges How speaking up about his story has helped him in his personal recovery Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Smith Alley He is the founder of The Live Life Bigger Foundation. After deciding to change the course of his life at age 14, he faces his struggles with pornography and mental health head on, advocating about the effects of social media and pornography on teens. Now a senior in high school, Smith speaks to groups around the country, operates his non profit and continues to work on his business ProtechtStrong; helping parents set up their technology safely and spear the porn talk in the home. Smith keeps up his work while doing school, playing lacrosse, and continually entertaining his car and motorcycle hobbies. Smith hopes that his story and his young perspectives will inspire people to live a more fulfilling life beyond their screen, and his love for others will be felt in leaps and bounds. Email: smithalley@livelifebigger.org Website: www.livelifebigger.org
48:05
March 24, 2022
Moving forward in the aftermath of her worst case scenario - Kim - Episode 132
I'm joined by Kim, a woman who has found growth and purpose in her life despite going through her worst case scenario. Kim courageously tells her story about confronting the realities of her husband's addictive and abusive behaviors that ultimately resulted in her having to separate and file for divorce. During the separation and divorce proceedings, he committed suicide, leaving his four children without their father. Kim speaks candidly about her journey and how she has found growth and purpose in the aftermath of this tragic ending. In this episode, we discuss: Why isolation is a huge challenge for those who have been betrayed Why safety is critical when trying to heal Her post-traumatic growth and how she found hope in the face of tragedy. The reality that you're not alone and that you can thrive even if your worst case scenario happens Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children.
01:05:53
March 17, 2022
Practicing sexual mindfulness as a couple - Dr. Chelom Leavitt - Episode 131
When our sex lives are struggling, we have a tendency to drive up the intensity as a way to improve our experience. This often feels like an endless chase that leaves us feeling more defeated. Did you know that slowing down and practicing sexual mindfulness actually leads to more consistent orgasm, a sense of harmony in sexual interactions, and a feeling like the relationship was flourishing instead of floundering?Our guest today is Dr. Chelom Leavitt, a professor and researcher at Brigham Young University, who studies sexuality and mindfulness in relationships. She is the co-author of two books, "A Better Way to Teach Kids About Sex" and "Sexual Wholeness in Marriage ", along with other articles and resources available on her website. In this episode, we discuss: What is sexual mindfulness Her research project on sexual mindfulness The improvements she notices with the couples who practice this Ways couples can practice mindfulness in other areas of their relationship How sexual mindfulness can help couples healing from sexual betrayal Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Dr. Chelom Leavitt Dr. Chelom E. Leavitt is an Assistant Professor in the School of Family at Brigham Young University. She earned her PhD from Penn State. Chelom researches mindfulness and sex within committed relationships. Dr. Leavitt validated a sexual mindfulness curriculum as an effective method to increase emotional connection, sexual and relational satisfaction, and sexual functioning. www.chelomleavitt.com www.instagram.com/sexualmindfulnessproject/ www.facebook.com/Sexual-Mindfulness-Project A Better Way to Teach Kids About SexSexual Wholeness in Marriage 
42:13
March 10, 2022
Four phases of healing from sexual betrayal - Tammy Gustafson - Episode 130
Betrayed partners often have difficulty knowing where they're at in the healing process. After the chaos of discovery and early recovery, the rest can seem like a blur. My guest is Tammy Gustafson, therapist, coach, and writer, who helps break down four distinct phases of healing from betrayal trauma. In this episode, we cover: The 4 phases of healing after betrayal Why they are important How knowing where you are impacts the healing process How to balance the individual journey with the patterns of healing What things a betrayed wife should focus on in each phase What happens when the husband and wife are in different phases Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Tammy She earned a Master’s Degree in Counseling from Denver Seminary and her passion is helping women recover from trauma, PTSD, as well as helping wives heal from betrayal. Her focus is to help them get unstuck, discovering ways to live with purpose, joy, and confidence so they are free to move forward and leave their past behind. Tammy is the founder and director of LiveFree Counseling in Colorado, a counseling center specializing in trauma recovery. Tammy has over a decade of experience. She is an EMDR Certified Therapist. She has shared with hundreds of people on the topics of healing from betrayal, understanding and managing the effects of trauma, setting healthy boundaries, and other mental health issues. She connects easily with audiences through her authenticity, humor, and compassion. Website: www.betrayalhealing.com Quiz: www.betrayalhealing.com/quiz Instagram: www.instagram.com/tammylgustafson
44:42
February 24, 2022
The power of community in pornography recovery - Chandler R - Episode 129
After years of struggling to overcome pornography, my guest in this episode, Chandler, decided to create a solution to help combat the most painful part of his struggle - isolation. He is the co-founder of  Relay — an app that helps people stay connected and accountable along the road to recovery. It makes it easy to find and maintain tight-knit support in a team-based environment. Listen to Chandler's experience in recovery and why creating community has been such a strong drive for him in his recovery. You can join Relay using this affiliate link: https://bit.ly/relay-geoff-steurer-referral Follow Relay on Instagram @joinrelay Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children.
32:00
February 17, 2022
Improve your self-awareness - Genny Rumancik - Episode 128
Self-awareness will improve your relationship with yourself and with others. My wife and I invited Genny Rumancik from the EQ School to join us for a discussion on how to build self-awareness. In this episode we discuss: The definition of self-awareness Why it matters individually and in relationships The origins of self-awareness The process for developing self-awareness What gets in the way of developing our self-awareness Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Genny Rumancik Genny is the owner and lead facilitator at The EQ School, in Portland, Oregon, where she teaches online workshops on how to develop emotional intelligence. She's passionate about increasing the importance of and fluency around emotional intelligence in our society and communities, and uses her background as an educator to put everything she's learned about emotional self management, healing from trauma, and relational development into easy to follow workshops that focus on the "HOW," so people walk away with real tools they can apply to their lives. Website: www.theeqschool.co IG: @theeqschool Online courses: https://the-eq-school.teachable.com/
48:46
February 10, 2022
Launching young adults doesn't have to become a crisis - Dr. Mark McConville - Episode 127
We want our children to learn how to be healthy adults and develop the skills necessary for them to succeed in life. However, many young people experience anxiety, isolation, and depression that can turn into unhealthy coping strategies when they don't feel prepared to succeed in adulthood. And, many parents watching their young adult children struggle can get caught up in conflict, drama, angst, and struggle as they launch their teens into adulthood. I'm joined by my wife, Jody, and our guest Dr. Mark Mcconville, author of the book "Failure to Launch: Why Your Twentysomething hasn't grown up...and what to do about it" to talk about how we can help our young people thrive in adulthood. In this episode, we discuss: The modern challenges with teens transitioning to adulthood The three main tasks teens must master to be prepared for adulthood How we can help them with each of these tasks Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. I maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Dr. Mark McConvilleMark McConville Ph.D. is a Clinical Psychologist in private practice in Beachwood, Ohio, specializing in adult, adolescent, emerging adult, and family psychology.  Dr. McConville is a senior faculty member at the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland, and has taught and published widely on the subjects of child development, parenting, and counseling methodology.  His book Adolescence: Psychotherapy and the Emergent Self  (Jossey-Bass, 1995) was awarded the 1995 Nevis Prize for Outstanding Contribution to Gestalt Therapy theory. He is co-editor of The Heart of Development: Gestalt Approaches to Childhood and Adolescence, vols. I & II,(The Analytic Press, 2001).  His most recent book, Failure to Launch:  why your twentysomething hasn’t grown up, and what to do about it (G.P. Putnam’s Sons, 2020), has received wide acclaim.  In addition to his private clinical practice, Dr. McConville serves as Consulting Psychologist to Hathaway Brown School and University School, both in the Cleveland area. Website: https://markmcconvillephd.com/ Book: Failure to Launch: Why your twentysomething hasn't grown up and what to do about it
49:46
February 04, 2022
Ladies, your low sex drive doesn't mean you're broken - Jamee Andelin - Episode 126
If you're a woman and you have a low sex drive, please don't automatically assume you're broken. There are so many reasons this can be happening. Betrayal, family issues, relationship challenges, biological factors, illness, small children, sleep deprivation, and on and on. The good news is that with some education and skills, you can begin to identify those inhibiting factors so you can reclaim your desire. Of course, if you're going through some kind of sexual betrayal, your sex drive is going to be all over the place. Sometimes it will be high, sometimes it will be low, and sometimes you'll wonder if you'll ever find it again. Be gentle with your self as you listen to this great interview with women's sexuality coach, Jamee Andelin, who explains why you're not broken and how sexual desire isn't just something you can will into existence. In this interview, we discuss: What women often believe and tell themselves about their low sexual desire The origins of these harmful beliefs How societal / cultural messages impact women's sexual desire Other factors impact women's sexuality How women who have been sexually betrayed can reclaim their sexuality Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Jamee Andelin Jamee is constantly gaining education in all its many forms, applying it, and then sharing what works with anyone who wants to listen. She is most proud of her marriage, her children, and that one time when her dishwasher and dryer were running at exactly the same time. Connect with her @jameeandelin on Instagram Email: coachingwithjamee@gmail.com Podcast https://anchor.fm/jamee-andelin
57:32
January 27, 2022
A better way to discuss pornography concerns when dating - Dr. Adam Moore and Wendy Morkel - Episode 125
How do you know if it's safe to be in a relationship with someone who has struggled with pornography? Dr. Adam Moore returns to the podcast with his co-author, Wendy Morkel, where they talk about how to navigate dating someone who has struggled with pornography. This is a great episode to share with loved ones who are dating and wondering about how to bring up this potentially challenging subject. In this episode, we discuss: What’s different about dealing with porn in dating relationships vs. married How and when someone should bring up the topic of pornography in a dating relationship What questions should people ask in this conversation What couples need to know if they’re going to successfully navigate a porn problem together Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Dr. Adam Moore Dr. Adam Moore is a licensed marriage and family therapist, and co-owner of Sela Health, a mental health clinic that operates 5 locations in Utah and Nevada. He's a frequent guest at workshops and podcasts and host of his own podcast called Pocket therapist. He and his wife run their counseling practice together and try to homeschool their 5 kids.   About Wendy Morkel Wendy Morkel is a writer, editor, web contributor, and a therapist. She has her master's degree in English language and resides in Mapleton, Utah. She is passionate about faith, her marriage and family (mother of six children ages 20-7), friends, and pebble ice.
41:54
January 20, 2022
Settling into the journey of healing from betrayal trauma - Jeni Gessel aka "Scabs" - Episode 124
I was thrilled to sit down with Jeni Gessel (aka: "Scabs"), who was the host of the podcast "Love Rice" and has coached and supported women healing from betrayal trauma for years. She is currently finishing her licensure to be a therapist. She's been on a long recovery journey through healing from betrayal trauma and I wanted my listeners to hear what it sounds like when someone has accepted and settled into the long journey of healing. She share lessons on acceptance, wholeness, authenticity, and how to surrender to the journey. Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Jeni Gessel I help people calm anxiety and rebuild after betrayal trauma. I believe that wellness is our natural state of being and because of this health and healing are within reach. I am your advocate during your personalized healing process. Betrayal Trauma, intimate deception, or infidelity is incredibly painful and complicated. You might feel confusing emotions like intense fear, numbness, and anger. You might feel lost or the intense anxiety of holding it all together. I help people like you find clarity, peace, and a sense of self-trust. https://www.arizonafamilyinstitute.com/Jeni-Gessel-LAC
44:30
January 13, 2022
How families can be a resource in addiction recovery - Danny and Emily Deaton - Episode 123
Family members can both help and harm those recovering from addiction. Having the right education and resources makes all the difference for families who want to help. I had the privilege of interviewing Danny and Emily Deaton from "Your Living Proof" about how families can make a difference in the lives of those they love who are struggling with addiction. In this episode, we discuss: Danny's journey through addiction and recovery How they see families helping/harming the addiction recovery process What families need to understand about addiction How family members can be most helpful You can purchase a 4-course bundle from Your Living Proof. Use the code: GS10 to save 10%. Here are the details of their online course bundle: This bundle is for every mother, father, sister, friend who is ready to know what THEY can do to start fighting for their loved one’s life. The bundle includes over 2 hours of personal instruction from Danny so you can learn and master the following concepts: The three roadblocks families unknowingly place in their loved one’s path. The four lies that keep everyone in a holding pattern. Why it is impossible for your loved one to do this alone. Two addiction principles that will move you from insanity to progress. Addiction myths – busted Three hinge points that will create the structure required to influence the outcome. What you must immediately stop doing. Creating your own emergency kit. Download my FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with me on social media: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Danny and Emily Deaton Once a homeless, incarcerated drug addict, Danny Deaton is now a husband, father of three, and 14 years clean and sober. Danny is the founder and owner of Living Proof Recovery Services; a company whose mission is to save families who are losing the battle of addiction inside their home. He also hosts the Your Living Proof Podcast and has produced workbooks and online courses for individuals and families who need support in understanding their role in their loved ones recovery. Links:   https://yourlivingproof.com    Follow on Instagram @yourlivingproof   https://instagram.com/yourlivingproof?utm_medium=copy_link    Follow on FB @yourlivingproof   https://www.facebook.com/yourlivingproof/  
48:22
January 13, 2022
Refusing the victim mindset even when you've been victimized - Lindsay and Danny Poelman - Episode 122
When you've been betrayed by your spouse, it's important to make room for the initial shock and work toward emotional and physical safety. However, it's tempting for someone who has been victimized to stay frozen in the victim position. Also, this doesn't only apply to betrayed spouses. Most individuals who struggle with sexually compulsive behaviors or other addictions often feel victimized by their histories, mental illnesses, relationships, or other outside factors. In this episode, I interview recovery coaches, Lindsay and Danny Poelman, who teach about how to take personal responsibility through the recovery process no matter what has happened to you. In this episode, we talk about: Their recovery story Why couples focus so much on the other person's recovery/healing instead of their own. What focusing on your own healing looks like Actionable steps each person can do to take personal ownership of their own healing How to stay connected as a couple while they work recovery together Download Geoff’s FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with Geoff Steurer: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. Lindsay and Danny's Websites and Social Media: https://lindsaypoelmancoaching.com https://www.dannypoelman.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lindsaypoelmancoaching/ (@lindsaypoelmancoaching) https://www.instagram.com/dannypoelmancoaching/  (@dannypoelmancoaching)
51:40
December 16, 2021
Creating a sexually safe relationship - Tammy Hill - Episode 121
Creating a sexually safe relationship in marriage is difficult for many couples, even when there's not been betrayal. However, when you add the element of betrayal, it makes creating a secure sexual connection even more challenging. I invited Tammy Hill, LMFT and AASECT member, to join me on the podcast to talk about: How couples can begin exploring this topic safely What she considers the hallmarks of a sexually safe relationship What societal myths keep couples from experiencing a safe sexual relationship What men need to be aware of What women need to be aware of What if there is betrayal? Previous trauma? Health issues? Download Geoff’s FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with Geoff Steurer: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children. About Tammy Hill Tammy Hill, LMFT, ASSECT Member has a private therapeutic practice, and teaches courses on marriage and sexuality at Brigham Young University. She has a new children’s book, “God Made Girls and Boys” that can be found on her website www.tammyhill.com  Her second book, “Your Body and the Plan of Happiness” will be finished next year. She hosts the "Live Your Why" Podcast on Apple and Spotify.  She snd her husband, Jeff Hill, have a combined family with 12 children, with 35 grandchildren and more in the way!
50:22
December 09, 2021
How to stay optimistic and motivated after a recovery setback - Geoff Steurer - Episode 120
Some call them relapses. Others call them slips. Regardless of what you call it, setbacks in recovery are often a huge source of shame, disappointment, and emotional turmoil. They reopen old wounds, impact trust, and have the potential to generate a lot of hopelessness. The way you respond to your own setbacks in recovery can make all the difference in your progress. In this episode, I respond to a few questions from a man who is working through his own recovery process and was feeling discouraged after a recent setback. Here are the questions: How do you find optimism and emotionally recovery quickly after a relapse? How do you deal with a sexual dream? They happen sometimes and, dang it, it always precedes a difficult day. How do you stay willing when you know your willingness is the only thing saving you from relapse? It gets tough to not worry when not worrying is the only thing saving you. How can I handle emotions of discontent or stress or loneliness when my normal schedule is interrupted by a trip or event? It definitely happens a lot, and I don't want it to be an Achilles heel for me. Download Geoff’s FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with Geoff Steurer: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Geoff Steurer I am a licensed marriage and family therapist, relationship educator, and coach with over 20 years of experience. I am the co-author of, "Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity", the host of the weekly podcast, "From Crisis to Connection", and have produced workbooks, audio programs, and online courses helping couples and individuals heal from the impact of sexual betrayal, unwanted pornography use, partner betrayal trauma, and rebuilding broken trust. As a leader in the field, I am a frequent contributor on these subjects at national conferences, documentaries, blogs, magazines, and podcasts. I also write a weekly relationship advice column available on my blog. I founded and ran an outpatient sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery group program for over 14 years, co-founded and chaired a local conference to educate community members about harmful media, and founded and administered a specialized group therapy practice for over 10 years. I currently maintain a private counseling and coaching practice in beautiful Southern Utah where I live with my wife and children.
31:09
December 03, 2021
Setting boundaries with family during the holidays - Geoff & Jody Steurer - Episode 119
The Holidays are upon us and that means family and friends gathering. This can be something you dread or something you cherish. Either way, it's going to require healthy boundaries if you're going to stay sane! Join me and my wife, Jody, as we answer questions from our listeners on their most challenging holiday boundary questions. My wife, Jody, is the co-host of the podcast, Speak up Sister Podcast listeners can receive a 20% discount on my Trust Building Bootcamp by entering the coupon code: PODCAST20 at checkout. https://www.geoffsteurer.com/trust-building-bootcamp Download Geoff’s FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with Geoff Steurer: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources.
01:16:27
November 18, 2021
Building a shame-free marriage in recovery - Hayden and Savannah Paul - Episode 118
It's possible to build a healthy marriage when recovering from a pornography addiction, but several important things need to be in place. I interview Hayden and Savannah Paul, a couple who are committed to building a shame-free marriage as Hayden works through his addiction recovery. Hayden was transparent about his struggle with pornography early in their dating relationship and has taken charge of his own recovery. If you want to hear what it takes to build a shame-free marriage in recovery, listen to what this couple is doing. Podcast listeners can receive a 20% discount on my Trust Building Bootcamp by entering the coupon code: PODCAST20 at checkout. https://www.geoffsteurer.com/trust-building-bootcamp Download Geoff’s FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with Geoff Steurer: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. About Hayden and Savannah Hayden and Savannah Paul were married on January 24, 2020. Since then they’ve been living in Sandy, Utah. Hayden and Savannah seek to change the conversation surrounding pornography with a focus on de-shaming the problem so true healing can occur. They host a weekly podcast titled “I Stand at The Door.” It’s geared toward helping parents, youth and church leaders understand and navigate the complicated issue surrounding porn. Hayden personally fought a 10-year battle against this struggle and after learning many lessons has now, for over a year, felt the peace and freedom that comes from the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Savannah is a native of Illinois and a returned missionary from the Las Vegas West mission. She finished her degree in nursing at BYU this past April and gave birth to their baby, Walker, a week later. She loves to sing, play the piano, and watercolor. Hayden grew up in Sandy and served his mission in Budapest, Hungary. He is an infantry rifleman in the United States Marine Corp and currently serves in a reserve capacity with 4th LAR Charlie Company. He loves being a dad and throws their baby around more than Savannah would like. Hayden also works for Operation Underground Railroad, an organization dedicated to the rescue and rehabilitation of children who are in the bonds of sex trafficking. https://www.istandatthedoor.com/
53:42
November 12, 2021
How burnout can make your stronger - Valerie Hamaker - Episode 117
If you're feeling burned out, you're not alone! We're all feeling the effects of the worldwide pandemic, economic uncertainty, political divisions, and family challenges. It's a tough time and many people feel like they're reaching their limit. However, my guest on this episode, Valerie Hamaker, says that burnout is actually an invitation that puts us in contact with our true selves. She teaches that burnout is the perfect opportunity to dig deeper and do life in a better, more supportive way. Come listen as she breaks down how we can do this without feeling the need to do more. Podcast listeners can receive a 20% discount on my Trust Building Bootcamp by entering the coupon code: PODCAST20 at checkout. https://www.geoffsteurer.com/trust-building-bootcamp Download Geoff’s FREE guide to help you quickly end arguments with your spouse: https://www.geoffsteurer.com/3-steps-to-end-your-marriage-argument Connect with Geoff Steurer: www.instagram.com/geoffsteurer/ www.facebook.com/GeoffSteurerMFT Visit http://www.geoffsteurer.com for online courses and other supportive resources. Valerie Hamaker is an individual and couples therapist with special training in trauma recovery, sexual health, depth psychology, and issues of spiritual development. Valerie presents nationally on a variety of topics and most recently has turned her focus to the tac