Grace Over 40

A special agent, a high-level bodyguard, and an electronic-detection K9 handler are just some of the things that Alani Bankhead has been in her life. Oh, and she's a fellow rockerchick....so that's extra cool in my book.

Her story truly reads like a movie screenplay.

She never really set out to be any of those things, but God had other plans for her. 

Alani's story proves that God will sometimes lead us down a path we never expected to be on, and may not even feel qualified for, but if we just trust Him we will find that His favor and provision will show up in droves.

Can't wait for you to hear Alani's incredible story.

'I don't want to'. These are four words that can wreck our lives if left unchecked.

I think they are most destructive when they aren't even spoken aloud, but are instead played in our heads.

(I don't want to talk about that right now. I don't want to work out today. I don't want to pay off debt instead of going on vacation, I don't want to have to look for another job....etc etc)

'I don't want to' basically means 'I'm not going to make myself'.

Self-discipline is something I have struggled with in the past, but once I realized how many ways it was affecting my life I started to actively work on improving it. 

If lack of self-discipline has ever stopped you from doing something, then it likely still is in some regard. 

But even if you don't think you have an issue with self-discipline you may want to give this episode a listen anyway.

Because 'I don't want to' on ANY level can do lots and lots of damage long-term. 

If I had three wishes from a genie, one of them would be this girl's wardrobe! No joke!

Melanie Miller is totally my fashion icon. 

I think she does a perfect job of throwing the dumb 'you're too old to wear that' stereotype out the window, but she never EVER looks like she is just trying to pretend she is younger.

She just has an amazing sense of style and a way of putting outfits together that I completely adore. 

I am so excited to introduce Melanie to you in this episode. She's a true beauty inside and out. 

Never has it been more apparent that our life can be completely disrupted when we least expect it than it has in 2020.

Everything about our lives has been disrupted for several months now. And there's been nothing we can do about it.

But even when we're not in the midst of a pandemic we regularly deal with disruptors. Unexpected car repairs, illness, lost jobs. They can happen at any time, and they're never convenient.

So if we can't stop them, then how do we handle them without being totally bowled over and left feeling helpless and depressed?

In this episode we'll talk about just that. Can't wait to share this one with you.

This episode is very near and dear to my heart, since I have studied nutrition and wellness for 25 years. Before Grace Over 40 I even had a nutrition and wellness business. It will always be something that is super important to me.

But never has it been more important than in midlife. 

Midlife is 'go time' for physical health. Meaning if you haven't taken it very seriously up until now, it's time to do so.

Today we'll talk about five things that are super important to implement in our 40s to be sure we don't end up in a world of hurt (literally) 10, 15, or 20 years from now.

Please tune in to this episode and really take these words to heart. Your body....and your future self....will thank you.

What do you get when you cross crazy hormones, changing bodies, life pivots, and declining self-esteem??

You get the 'Hot Mess' part of midlife!

I feel like we should've gotten a brochure about this somewhere around our mid-30s. Something along the lines of....

"Do you want change in your life? Well just wait til your 40s! Everything will change AT ONCE!" (It's funny/not funny.)

Today we're going to talk about the three main ways we are affected by midlife change, and also about a related change that is coming to Grace Over 40 as well.

Can't wait for you to hear!

Oh, aging skin. Remember when we could just slap on some mascara and go? *sigh*

As we age, things in the makeup department tend to get a bit more difficult unfortunately.

But there's a 'right' way to do things to ensure that your cosmetics paint your face in the most flattering light. Pun intended.

Today I'm speaking with Rami Parker who is a makeup artist that has perfected this art. I could not believe it when I realized how old she is! She easily looks ten years younger if not more, and that is in large part due to the makeup she uses and the way she applies it.

Rami will be sharing some of her best makeup tips for aging skin with us, along with some great products to try. Plus she's adorable! Can't wait for you to give this episode a listen. 

PS: I purchased some makeup from Rami since recording this episode and I love it! 

I turned 50 last week and was actually super glad to leave my 40s in the dust, because they were a HOT MESS!

I could legit write a screenplay about the last ten years of my life and it would have drama for daaaaaaaaays.

Well you know what usually comes with drama? A side of life lessons! 

In this episode I share with you the 10 most standout things that I learned in my 40s, which shaped me into who I am today: A woman who truly loves her life and who she is becoming with God's help. 

My life feels light and beautiful after learning these things, but I had to learn them the hard way. Here's the cliff notes for lucky you.....

Being stuck SUCKS.

'But I'm not stuck' you say. 

Are you sure? 

I find that most all the frustrations, disappointments, and feelings of restlessness that women experience midlife can almost always come back to being 'stuck' somewhere, whether they realize it or not.

In this episode we'll talk about some common places we can get stuck midlife, as well as five ways to tell if you ARE stuck.

Even if you don't feel like you have a 'stuck' problem I still highly recommend you give this one a listen. 

Oh my gosh, I LOVE this topic and this episode!!

I am a DIY kinda girl with creative challenges (LOL), so I was thrilled to be able to talk to Cara Massie of Cara Massie Design about how we can easily decorate and DIY our way to homes that bring us a feeling of peace and comfort without spending a ton of money!

I don’t know about you, but now that I’m in my 40s I’ve collected a lot of crap that I’m just plain sick of! So we’ll talk about that too. 

If you have ever gone down the Pinterest home decor rabbithole only to come out feeling overwhelmed and not knowing where to start then this episode is for you!

'Self-care'. You see it everywhere. It's touted as the be-all and end-all of treating yourself right. 

It will fill your cup, they say.

While this is true to some degree, it is not what we actually need to feel truly refilled, refueled, and refreshed.

In this episode we will talk about a MUCH better option than 'self-care', and I'll share with you some great resources to help you practice it.

May is Mental Health Awareness month, so it's a great time to share this interview I did with Brenda Saxe and Monica Sigmund of Family Ties Coaching.

Brenda and Monica are Christian mental health and wellness life coaches who facilitate support groups for suicide loss and attempt survivors. They also support family members who have been touched by suicide or suicide attempts. 

If you listened to episode 21 you know that this is something that has touched my family personally, so I am determined to do what I can to bring this subject into the light, and help erase the stigma around it.

Please don't skip over this episode because you think it doesn't apply to you. 

I pray that it never does, but we ALL need to raise our awareness about this so we know the signs to look for in friends and family members. It could save someone's life. 

We've all experienced hardship, loss, heartache, and difficulties. At this point in our lives many of us have gone through quite a bit, and may be feeling kind of beat up.

But we have an important decision to make at this stage. Are we going to let what we've been through make us bitter? Or are we going to use it to make us better?

In today's episode we'll talk about how to do that, as well as the importance of growing 'deep roots' as we move into the second half of our lives. 

This was a tough one to record. But April 21st is a special date in our house (I explain why in this episode), so I felt this was the right time to record it.

In this episode my husband and I share our struggles as we walked together through his addiction, bipolar diagnosis, and suicide attempts.

As with anything difficult that we go through, I feel that it is vitally important that we share with others the things that we learned the hard way, so that they don't have to. 

Some things I would like to note about this episode....

• This is a completely candid, real conversation. I wanted to leave it as raw as possible, because the subject matter is raw.
• Everything we talk about here is based on our own personal experiences. We are not medical professionals, nor are we making any recommendations in any sort of medical capacity. As with anything, please contact a professional if you need help.
• It contains sensitive subject matter, so please listen with discretion.
• There was not any violence in our situation, but I know that it can sometimes accompany addiction in a relationship. So if you are in a dangerous situation it is important that you get yourself to safety first and foremost.

If you know anyone who might benefit from this episode PLEASE share. It could change someone's life.

Love you guys. Thanks for listening.

Today I am speaking with author, speaker, influencer, and coach Jennifer Allwood about her #1 bestselling book 'Fear Is Not the Boss of You: How to Get Out of Your Head and Live the Life You Were Made For'.

If you are feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or scared in any way, shape, or form then this is the book for you. (And really who isn't in some regard??)

Jennifer will not only help you recognize if fear is stealing from you, but will also saddle up like a loving bff and show you how to fix it.

A mix of life experience, divine wisdom, and biblical truths, this book is exactly what you need if you know you were made for more but just can’t seem to push through the fear, ‘stuck-ness’, or uncertainty to get there.

I hope you love listening to this convo as much as I loved having it. 

We are all feeling kind of helpless right now. There is so much out of our control and we feel like everything is happening to us instead of happening for us. 

But there is a huge opportunity here to harness our current situation and make massive improvements in our lives because of it. 

This is a fantastic time to get still, get clarity, and get set up for returning to a life we will LOVE! One free from overwhelm, and full of joy and peace. 

This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Let's use it to our advantage. 

I'm talking today with Jill Lillard of The Happiest Lives and we're discussing how to have a happier marriage. 

Did you know that women are statistically most likely to divorce in their 40s? So needless to say this a pretty crucial time in our lives to talk about this. 

In this episode Jill gives us some great tips on how to be happier in our relationship, and also dispels some commonly held myths around that.

I love Jill's take on the part we play in keeping our marriage happy, and encourage you to listen. It's important stuff.

I feel like the whole country is sick right now. They are either sick with illness or sick with worry and fear.

Fear is not from God, so when we feel it we need to do what we can to not let it overtake us.

Today I am giving you 12 ways to wrestle fear to the ground and get your peace on! 

These tips are not only helpful for the world we are currently living in, but also for managing fear and worry in our daily lives. 

Please join me as we get out from under the overwhelm of fear, and replace it with the sweet relief of peace. 

Have you hit your 40s and begin to wonder 'Why am I here?' 

This is the perfect time in our lives to begin to ponder that, and it's also a great opportunity to reconnect with some of the things we were going to do 'someday'.

In this episode I am speaking with Rebekah Nolt about how to begin to sort those things out, and why right NOW is the perfect time to do so. 

Well there's no escaping it right now. We are in the midst of pandemic panic.

There is a lot of information out there on how to keep yourself safe physically, but no one is really talking about how we can protect ourselves mentally, emotionally, or spiritually through all of this.

So that's my goal with this episode where we'll talk about the three things that I think God wants us to know (and do) right now, and how those things can set our minds and our hearts at ease.

In addition, I'll be letting you know how you can get a great FREE resource from me right now (Hint: it's something I usually charge for!) that I truly believe can make a HUGE difference in your life, especially during a trying time such as this. 

Please listen to the episode in its entirety for the details on that. 

Love you all. Stay safe out there....

Today I'm speaking with Becky Evans of Cedar Creek Holistic Services, and we are talking perimenopause.

This is the period of time leading up to menopause, and can be somewhat trying as we experience massive hormonal changes, and all of the 'fun' that comes along with that.

Becky is sharing some tips for managing these symptoms using some of the tools that God gave us to make this transition as easy as possible.

How many times have you tried to improve yourself in some area, but instead just ended up feeling even worse about yourself because you weren't successful?

Today I am getting really vulnerable and sharing a huge personal battle of mine, and how I was finally able to get victory over it.

The way that most people approach self-help is to just 'make up their mind' that they are going to change something. And that's exactly why most aren't successful, because that is just the FIRST STEP in the process. 

Give a listen to this episode where we talk about what it really needs to look like to walk this out in your life and meet with real, lasting success. 

I'm talking today with Julie Orr who publishes a magazine called 'Contemplate the Bible'. 

It is a print magazine that focuses on one to two books of the Bible at a time, and includes stunning photos as well.

Julie started publishing the magazine because she was having a hard time being consistent with reading the Word due to the busy-ness of life. 

She has now created a way for readers to pick up this magazine any time of the day or night, even if they only have a few minutes, and immerse themselves in God's Word in an engaging and visually appealing way.

She has also started sending her magazine to a women's prison in California, where it is used by the inmates as the backbone for the church they have started in the prison yard.

I think you will find her magazine concept to be a very unique and awesome way to spend more time with God!

In part three of our three part series 'The Grey Area: Uncertainty in Midlife' we are talking about  where you're headed, and how to design a future you'll love.

Time moves so quickly. Before we know it another 5, 10, 20 years will have gone by.

In this episode we discuss the importance of creating a plan to ensure that your future happens for you, instead of just happening to you.

There are things you can take action on beginning right now that will set you up for stepping into your second half of life feeling fulfilled and in alignment with all of the goodness God has for you!

Don't leave it to chance. Let's design a future you'll look back on someday and say 'Yes, that was the life I wanted to live'.

When we enter our 40s it can seem like taking care of ourselves becomes more difficult. 

But this is exactly when we really need to be focusing on just that, since aging bodies need to be cared for in order to prevent major health issues in the second half of life.

Lori Doddy supports women over 40 in this area and is a wealth of knowledge and encouragement around not only caring for our physical bodies, but also how that affects other areas in our life. 

In my conversation with her we discuss health, self-image, and even how these things relate to our purpose. I think you will find this conversation both enlightening and inspiring.

In Part Two of our three part 'Uncertainty in Midlife' series we're discussing the 'middle' or where we are now.

A lot of uncertainty in midlife comes from losing touch with who we are, so it's a great time to reflect on that and make some changes if necessary. (Spoiler alert: It's ALWAYS necessary)

I have gone through a major period of refinement in my 40s where God has brought a lot of things that were holding me back into the light, helped me heal from them, and taught me how to grow past them.

As a result I've experienced less conflict in my marriage, less conflict within myself, and SO much less stress in my life in general.

In today's episode I will tell you how to begin some self-reflection of your own, and encourage you to start to work out what you may need to change about where you are, so that you are well equipped to get to where you want to be.

My guest today is Tracey Lucke of MelMarie Skincare, and we're talking about skincare over 40.

Our skin changes so much as we age, and Tracey has some great tips as well as some awesome naturally-based products to share with us!

Today we're starting a three part series about uncertainty in midlife.

As we begin to think about what we want the remainder of our life to look like, and start to plan out how we'll get there, it's important to look at three different things: 1) Where we've been, 2) Where we are, and 3) Where we're headed.

Today we kick off the series talking about the importance of revisiting who you've been up til now, and how all of your prior experiences are an important factor in where you're headed. 

Kelli Nielsen has been through an unfathomable amount of grief. She has lived through things most of us hope to never have to. 

But that is not her story. Kelli's story is a story of HOPE and HAPPINESS in spite of everything she has gone through. 

Grief can take many forms (death, divorce, massive disappointment) and it typically broadsides us when we least expect it. It also takes a lot of us down....sometimes for a very long time.

Kelli wants to show us how to not only overcome grief, but to come through it even better than before. This is an AMAZING story of hope and overcoming. Can't wait for you to hear it.

What exactly happens to us in our 40s? 

Why is this the time when people are most likely to have a 'midlife crisis', or get divorced, or go completely off the rails? 

Well it's actually due to a couple of things, both of which are very REAL, and both of which can take you down if you don't know how to handle them.

In today's episode we'll talk about some healthier ways you can navigate this often tumultuous time of life..

Gray hair, wrinkles, spontaneous chin hairs....

On today's episode we'll talk about how to walk the line between freaking out about all the BONKERS things our bodies do midlife, and staying grounded in where our real worth lies. 

With a propensity towards rock music, and a love for long-haired, tattooed boys, I've never felt like a 'normal' Christian. 

In this episode we'll talk about how 'misfit' Christians (and troubled people in general) are EXACTLY the type of people that Jesus gravitated towards, and still does today. So bring your mess! That's exactly where he wants to meet you!

An unexpected event in my life this week became a perfect example of why you absolutely SHOULD NOT WAIT to make the changes you want to make in your life. I hope this inspires you to move forward. Just be sure to listen for God's direction in the process. 

Welcome to the Grace Over 40 Podcast! 

This first episode is just a quick intro to who I am and what to expect 'round here. 

Let's do this!