The Tijuana of New Hampshire
It’s a real clusterfruit in here, as Chris and Steve are joined by John and Rob for our first in-person episode since early 2020. Learn why John was into the Prodigy, why Rob does NOT call them moist towelettes, and why Chris can’t do a Borat impression to save his life (or his wife). Then listen as Steve tries to explain where East Coast Video used to be, all without strangling his constantly interrupting co-host.
July 12, 2021
Older Than Homer Simpson
For the first time in nearly a year, Chris and Steve are here to invade your earholes.
February 16, 2021
Chris and Steve are on an indefinite hiatus due to the Coronavirus crisis.
March 23, 2020
The Linda Hamilton Paradox
Would Steve ever consider adopting a primate? In what way is Chris like Tonya Harding? And what exactly is consensual kneecap banging?
March 16, 2020
Super Mario 65
Steve finds out what happens when LEGOs stop being polite and start getting real. Plus: whatever was stupid, that’s what Chris did.
March 09, 2020
Steve spoils the Yankee Cannonball, Chris thinks it’s better when bathrooms don’t have doors, and one of us is involved in a top-20 lesbian romance.
March 02, 2020
Chris is such a supportive daddy, Steve has SUCH strong feelings about crocs and socks, and the only Vs we want are the consummate ones.
February 24, 2020
Winnie the Pooh With a Bat
Steve gets things started with some Hawk Talk; Chris finally begins the recounting of his vacation to Orlando, Florida; and the fellas announce plans for the Horribly Off-Topic World theme park.
February 17, 2020
Where the Brassieres Live
Chris thinks someone in the relationship between the McDonald's and Coca-Cola corporations is the son of a fizzy bitch. Meanwhile, Steve wants to learn all about that lost Dr. Seuss classic "Horton Gets His Rectal Exam."
February 10, 2020
Your Future in College Radio
Find out what happens when Chris blames it on the drain, why someone once asked “Hey Steve, can you take care of this guy for me?” and who it is that’s just like one of our hosts, only not funny.
January 20, 2020
Muppets in the Middle
Chris overreacts when a guy tells him he’s not a Star Wars fan, Steve remembers Sam the Eagle’s name but can’t remember Sweetums’, and it’s 70 degrees outside in the middle of January.
January 13, 2020
Jingle Gel and the Junk Trunk
Chris asks for advice on "Rick and Morty," Steve coins the simile “like a warm human bidet,” and we learn why everybody on Twitter right now is like the Penguin.
December 23, 2019
Chris can’t choose between altra and regular, Steve woodburies the lede, and we research the etymology of the word dildo.
December 02, 2019
Anybody Who’s Everybody
Steve comes up as a crazy wave, Chris has a few miles on his metaphorical tires, and it’s a rare circumstance when a great movie is also a great pinball machine.
November 18, 2019
Steve says he’s never intentionally written anything, Chris wonders if the latest top-notch video game is just an updated version of PAPERBOY, and together we learn that you can’t double nothing.
November 11, 2019
My Buddy and Twin Sister
Steve calls the fire department and Chris explains why Kelly was Al Bundy’s Roadrunner.
November 04, 2019
No one brought their axes to class, Steve doesn’t know why he said “baby cat,” and Chris wonders if the kid from "Mid90s" will escape the corpse.
October 28, 2019
Chris stacks some wood, Steve plans a trip to the movies, and it turns out it’s called a “weird album.”
October 21, 2019
Crotchless Kid Rock
In which we learn Chris used to be a sloppy party bottom; Steve’s not a potato person anymore; and, if you’re starving, you could eat some fondant.
October 14, 2019
A Car That Isn't a Car
Steve visits Canobie Lake Park, Chris visits the Registry of Motor Vehicles, and one of us gets better at subtle nudging.
September 30, 2019
An Eye on Ziering
Chris has a full-on hard-on for Dr. Seuss, and Steve doesn't understand a balk unless it comes from a chicken.
September 25, 2019
Deep Hot Lore
Steve loves "The Boys," Chris doesn’t love King Richard’s Faire, and Maine really loves its Italians.
September 16, 2019
Chris has a very brief Amazon bitch, Steve has some suggestions about where Chris should start with Terry Gilliam, and we realize that we’ve always wanted to be a part of someone’s algorithm.
September 09, 2019
Steve turns 40, Chris learns what a “butt funnel” is, and we wonder if an atomic whoopee cushion could stop a hurricane.
August 26, 2019
Fart Is the Mind-Killer
Chris and Steve are joined by special guest Ryan for an episode where somebody loves a thick font, somebody wonders if Chris Evans was in "The Pirates of Penzance," and we debate the parentage of Maximillian Goof.
August 19, 2019
A HOT Summer Vacation
Chris has a brief announcement.
July 26, 2019
If That's What It Came To
Steve says he’s Both Guy, Chris needs to get himself a Little-Guy swagger, and someone DOES want to buy Dongclaw BUT…
July 15, 2019
Silver Ball Busters
Steve is both a newsboy and a newsman, Chris wonders what it might take to get higher than Phil Collins, and we learn what distinguishes the pros vs. the amateurs when it comes to verbs.
July 01, 2019
Did Chris buy Steve’s PS4 just because of his daughters’ love for high-end dollar stores? And did Steve really order a plate of endless broccoli? Listen now, and find out!
June 24, 2019
Catfishing Before It Was Cool
Chris liked holding the B button, Steve always wanted to visit Technical Town, and it turns out that there are two Kisses and not just one.
June 17, 2019
The Nightwing is the Right Wing
Someone loves Fruity Pebbles in a major way, someone wants to start a pirate franchise of his very own, and somewhere—SOMEWHERE—there’s a dog with boxing gloves on his hands.
June 10, 2019
Steve keeps on calling it The Salty Box and Chris keeps hating on yard sales, but the bumbles definitely don’t hate the hydrangea.
June 03, 2019
A Singular Timberlakian Accomplishment
The Tascam is out of the bag, Steve thinks our tombstones should be empty pizza boxes, and Chris asks if 'Troll 2' is better at being a bad movie than 'The Room.'
May 27, 2019
A Tissue on Deck
Chris announces the fate of his exquisite jingle corpse and Steve refuses to explain why he has a bag of boogies.
May 20, 2019
Too Many Snaps
SPOILERS: Chris and Steve share their controversial opinons about 'Avengers: Endgame' and 'The Long Night' (the third episode of the eighth season of 'Game of Thrones').
May 06, 2019
Angry Angry Hippos
Chris is a week behind and has a weak behind. Steve explains why people just get sick of laughing sometimes. And a local movie house picks bad young people.
April 29, 2019
Chris needs the best graphics card for boob touches and Steve becomes MacGyver for the movies.
April 22, 2019
Steve wonders if 'Thundercats' was the show that launched a thousand furries, but Chris thinks that everything is a thing and that it’s just a matter of when it got its name.
April 15, 2019
Doctors With Borders
Steve calls Chris a depresario, but all Chris wants to know is why Judy Blume never wrote a book for him.
April 09, 2019
An Unbeeped Version
Nobody showed Chris how to ease into a mullet. Meanwhile: Steve is rollin’ in the cheap and proclaiming his love for sloppy portmanteaus.
March 25, 2019
Chris and Steve get horribly off-topic from the get-go, then spend minutes 20-48 discussing the film 'Captain Marvel' (complete with spoilers).
March 20, 2019
Our Limited Skirmish
Steve wishes he could shuffle a sandwich together, Chris’ belt is named arbuckle, and we’ve both gotten a lot of triples in our lives.
March 11, 2019
Team Ice Cream
Steve needs to crack the case, Chris intends ALL of his puns, and we learn why milk shakes bring all the boys to the yard but frappes don’t.
March 04, 2019
Don't Call It a Callback
Steve explains how wrestling is like edging, Chris takes inspiration from the old sleepy coat bang, and we learn the name of Jesus’ favorite laundry detergent.
February 26, 2019
The Begots Are the Best Part
Drew Carey is ruining Chris’ childhood. Meanwhile, Steve is wondering: when she makes a mistake, do they call her Robin Wrong?
February 18, 2019
Therapy Spoken by Chris
Steve is sick of farting Fitchburgians drinking tall boys on the train, Chris is worried his therapist will tell him Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria isn't a real thing, and we imagine what would happen if we traveled back to the age of meaty candy bar phones.
February 11, 2019
Super Bowl Sunday Pordcast
In which we, two conflicted New England liberals, can't decide if we want our hometown team to win or lose.
February 04, 2019
Problems With Pants
Chris has troubles with trousers. Steve wonders if you can make paper out of a willow tree.
January 28, 2019
Steve got rid of his bag of boogies, Chris is looking for people who enjoy the penis, and we ask the most important question ever: was Wilford Brimley ever cut?
January 15, 2019
Suas Calças Estão Cheias de Queijo
Steve brings our old pal Leo by the studio for a visit, Chris distinguishes himself as a blue-balled man of integrity, and we learn how Proud Boys and Incels are really just modern-day orcs.
January 07, 2019
Hashtag Not My Dog
Basically: the dog was He-Man, so Chris couldn't like it.
December 27, 2018
Trigger Warning Too Late
This week we ask the profoundly important question: if Hitler had magic, could he make Chris enjoy an episode of 'Seinfeld'?
December 18, 2018
The Museum of Fine Farts
Chris would rather be Scottish than Irish, Steve played Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, and we solicit suggestions for how to finally get Chris into 'Seinfeld.'
December 11, 2018
Stevil and Carlsbad
Chris wonders if shit is holy in all of the Abrahamic religions. Meanwhile: Steve says ‘If you’re going to have a sequel, have a sequel. But don’t call it a comeback.’
December 03, 2018
Dasani and the Sierra Mist Singers
Steve gets his nails did in Ireland, Mr. Pibb is Dr. Pepper without the degree, and Chris swears that Hall & Oates has one mustache too many.
November 27, 2018
Complete Defensive Porpoises
Chris breaks a promise, Steve visits the Dingle Peninsula, and it turns out it's hard to explain a wax museum on the radio.
November 19, 2018
Trach My Word For It
Steve continues to recount his Irish honeymoon, Chris announces the release of his next book, and we both offer our hot takes on the death of comics legend Stan Lee.
November 13, 2018
Steve recounts the first few days of his honeymoon while Chris taste-tests donut-flavored lube.
November 06, 2018
45 Minutes of Steve’s Balls
Steve got married and Chris never offered his arm.
October 29, 2018
HOT Hiatus 2
Chris and Steve are taking a brief break from the show so that Steve can get married.
October 01, 2018
Chris goes to Portland, Oregon for the 2018 XOXO Festival, Steve goes to Portland, Maine for his bachelor party, and one of us goes to the mall and gets our prostrate massaged without meaning to.
September 17, 2018
Alt Water Wheel
Chris is going to the XOXO Festival in Portland, Oregon; Steve is having a bachelor party in Portland, Maine; and climate change in Portlands all over our fair planet is very, very real.
September 03, 2018
Steve has a birthday, Chris has some Ben & Jerry’s, and a listener has some strong feelings about the proper Terminator line-up. Plus: Where is Dyluck?! And: Who is Finley Harlocker?
August 27, 2018
Your Mom's Cloyster
Steve thinks listeners would miss Chris, Chris does his best to prove otherwise, and we both wonder what we’d do with Save Points in real life.
August 13, 2018
Hedgehog Neurologists Are the Heroes of Our Time
Chris saw 'Christopher Robin,' Steve saw a beer explode, and Apple saw fit to boot Alex Jones.
August 07, 2018
Chris is going to kick the shit out of his computer, and Steve is going to kick the shit out of Chris if he wears the orange tie.
July 30, 2018
Chris saw a kangaroo, Steve saw a sign, and we see eye-to-eye on the Firing of James Gunn.
July 24, 2018
Super-Ultra Monkey Fist
There's an American Girl in Natick and a Match.com girl on Steve's TV.
July 17, 2018
Chris drives his family to Universal Studios and Steve reveals that J.K. Rowling hates pinball.
July 10, 2018
Sorry, I’m Mr. Cool
Steve begs Chris not to get him started, but Chris does it anyway.
July 02, 2018
Chris doesn’t think soccer is a sport, Steve doesn’t understand why the dialogue in movies is so damn hard to hear, and we celebrate our fourth year of being HOT.
June 25, 2018
Major Plot Point
Chris explains that his penis is not dry heaving, not exactly; Steve elaborates on the difficulties of being a video game completionist; and we both sweat our balls off even though it's not yet summer.
June 19, 2018
Chris and Steve talk Pride Month, technology conferences, and what the Pac-Man might be if it were the name of a sexual position.
June 11, 2018
High Tolerance for Hot Sauce
Chris found something to blackmail his high school friends with, Steve heard a rumor about chickens, and the cool thing about the box was the box.
June 06, 2018
A Good Variety of Dumb
Chris and Steve discuss 'Avengers: Infinity War,' ghost population control, and their protocols for pooping.
May 29, 2018
Steve learns that less back equals more hair, Chris explains why he stood in line for eight hours the other day, and we agree that there’s no way to stop a wind-up toy.
May 21, 2018
Chris and Steve are taking a brief break from the show.
April 23, 2018
Lengthy Handsome Note
Steve thinks cemeteries are dumb, Chris feels guilt over all the films he’s never seen, and we need to stop celebrating the birthdays of dead people.
April 16, 2018
Chris details an 'Infinity War' theory in under a minute, Steve is uncomfortable watching Chris make out in 'The Mercy Seat,' and the parties of one year olds don’t always go the way you’d expect.
April 11, 2018
Chris tells the tale of his kid’s egg swan, Steve talks about a heck of a comeback, and a listener emails their pitch for a Coen Brothers crossover.
April 03, 2018
Chris cries on camera, Steve bets they only encouraged that dog, and we both wonder what it would take to make America Jesus again.
March 27, 2018
What About Bradley Cooper as Rocket J. Squirrel?
Whilst Chris says something (or, perhaps, many things) to elicit a 'Goddamnit' out of his co-host, Steve conceives of an 80s cinematic universe featuring Pee-Wee Herman, the Ghostbusters, and Martin Seamus McFly.
March 19, 2018
Chris and Steve are joined by Ryan to discuss backwards compatibility, Boston’s Scuffle Zone, and how there is never an 'and' on this podcast.
March 12, 2018
Let’s Not Make Things Things
Steve doesn’t understand understaffing on a Saturday night, Chris has figured out the best kind of ’chist to be, and the boys discuss the creation of a 21st century Blarney Stone.
March 09, 2018
Inception Is No Exception
Steve gets the 'are you fucking with me' look, Chris explains how to play Murder-Death-Kill, and 147 is the pager code for 'Steve’s an idiot.'
February 26, 2018
Come for the Novel, Stay for the Crab Cakes
Chris is rewriting a play, Steve is re-buying video games, and angry young cows are rebelling against their oppressors. Also: #NamisBoobs.
February 19, 2018
Prepon or Postpon?
Steve has a beef with the Block, Chris thinks lifting is for losers, and a corgi rides a pony.
February 13, 2018
Tripod and Yoga Mat in the Morning
A listener drops some knowledge, Steve drops a cough, and Tom Brady drops a pass.
February 07, 2018
Chris and Steve are joined by Ryan to talk lost thumbs, fair points, and CluckTube.TV.
January 29, 2018
It’s Number Time
Chris had a walk, Steve had an accident, and Old MacDonald HAD a farm.
January 22, 2018
Grape Nuts Speed
Chris’ mind is in the bidet whilst Steve watches games done quick. Meanwhile, Chris’ daughter gives an x-ray tech the finger.
January 15, 2018
Rated E for Explicit
Chris has something to say about wasted youth, Steve has a loud experience on a quiet car, and Great Britain is ruining Kentucky Fried Chicken Twitter.
January 08, 2018
Chris and Steve celebrate the new year with tales of arcades, assholes, and the World’s Fanciest McDonalds.
January 02, 2018
This Is a Really Dumb Thought, and We’re Not Even High
In which Chris and Steve celebrate Christmas 2017 by talking way too much about Ethan Embry.
December 26, 2017
Very Opinionated Opinions
Chris fails at Christmas shopping whilst Steve discovers it’s a small world after all.
December 19, 2017
Not Bueno or Sano
Steve clears the air, Chris plays pinball, and we recommend our favorite Richards.
December 11, 2017
The Luddites We Were Meant to Be
Steve gets a Christmas tree, Chris geeks out about a movie trailer, and we both buy a piece of the wall.
December 04, 2017
You Also Look Great
Steve attends his 20-year high school reunion, Chris spends some quality time with Stephen King, and we learn that mothers are the antithesis of pirates.
November 27, 2017
Chris swears 'Justice League' is worth swearing about and Steve had a couple of pleasant surprises this weekend.
November 20, 2017
Chris is full of metaphors, Steve is full of thoughts on Louis C.K., and we’re both full of questions like: 'Was that Beastie Boys or The Bloodhound Gang?'
November 13, 2017
When a Ragnarok Hits You Right in the Buns
Steve’s a pinball wizard and Chris has such a supple wrist, which means there has to be a twist, right? Oh yeah: it’s that we say we’re going to spoil 'Thor: Ragnarok' at the end, and then we don’t.
November 07, 2017
Explosive Diarrhea Mountain
Chris regales us with tales of his book’s launch and Steve returns to the scene of the Carlin’s.
October 31, 2017
An Unshaved Private
Steve is frustrated that the skunk persisted, Chris is worried about ripping people off, and we explain why you can’t dick around with consent.
October 23, 2017
There Was No Hetero Humping
Steve has another interesting story, Chris doesn’t want to be a Weinstein, and we wonder: at what point, when we were younger, did our parents stop giving a shit?
October 16, 2017
Viddler on the Roof
Chris reminds Steve that there are two Sarah Connors on 'Game of Thrones'; Steve is quick like a queef, but says that we can’t call the episode that; and we take two stabs at a tribute to Tom Petty.
October 09, 2017
Nothing to Do With Silas Marner
Steve is barking at cars, Chris can’t remember the names of people and things, and we have a very scientific discussion about masturbation frequency.
October 02, 2017
No Longer a Spoof
Chris is sweating dashes, Steve is sweating eggs, and listeners are sweating the details.
September 25, 2017
Fun Natural Fun
Steve joins a pinball league, Chris might be the second coming of the King, and Juggalos descend on Washington.
September 18, 2017
Harry Nilsson Holograms
Steve didn’t start remembering things until about 1987, Chris discovers that he’s an American medium, and Bill Skarsgård tries to fill Tim Curry’s big shoes.
September 11, 2017
Monkey Mark and the Monkey Bunch
Steve has a burgers for breakfast, Chris has questions for Dr. Seuss, and there is a lot to say about ducks.
September 05, 2017
Making Out With a Horse
Steve knows where he gets his OCD from, Chris knows he should probably tell people he has a book coming out, and we make predictions for the season finale of 'Game of Thrones.'
August 28, 2017
Portraits of America After the Apocalypse
Steve has an idea for a happy little documentary, Chris is hearing fighter jets in the mountains, and it’s been so long since we’ve had cake.
August 21, 2017
Take Me Down to the Vatican City
Steve’s band is big in Europe, Chris wants you to stand by him, and Metacritic ranks 37 Stephen King adaptations (in a row!).
August 14, 2017
Those Extra 4 Ounces of Beer
Steve swears that no one can chug a gallon of milk, Chris is younger than the goat, and there’s a reason Americans hate the color red.
August 07, 2017
Millennials Are Ruining Tooth Extraction
Steve wonders about naughty jigsaw puzzles, Chris reports on a one-armed machete-wielding clown, and a listener email demands that we come correct when it comes to Outkast.
August 01, 2017
Chris and Steve reflect on being HOT for the third year in a row, replaying some of their best material from the past 52 episodes.
July 24, 2017
Steve has a theory about the Big Bang and the community, Chris shares news about ICP fans and Catholic celiacs, and Spider-Man does whatever a spider can.
July 17, 2017
The Local Little Person
Steve is almost done with Zelda, Chris has seen 'Spider-Man: Homecoming' (twice), and there is much to be said about reactions to last week’s puppy chat.
July 10, 2017
In the Original Croatian
Chris learns what makes a dog dog-shaped and Steve has lots to say about the Super NES Classic.
July 03, 2017
What a Horrible Night to Have a Curse
Whilst Chris trolls Whovians and soccer fanatics, Steve hunts for houses and a cure for Simon’s curse.
June 26, 2017
Brave Warrior of Central Square
Chris buys a lawn mower that reminds us of Steve Buscemi, Steve paints a wall at the zoo, and corrections are corrected.
June 19, 2017
Pink Meat & Mayonnaise
Whilst Steve is ranking Rankin/Bass, Chris is trying his best not to tell dirty jokes.
June 12, 2017
Steve thought he saw a puddy tat, Chris definitely saw the days of our lives, and there’s only one way to melt a heart of stone.
June 05, 2017
The Horse of History
Steve wants you to smell his hat and Chris wants to get even personal than that.
May 30, 2017
My Hot Backlog
Steve improves Chris’ anecdote with well-timed jokes. Chris ‘improves’ Steve’s anecdote with an ill-timed impression.
May 22, 2017
I Take Dolores Umbridge With That
Chris missed his calling, Steve tries to snatch a hag’s gem, and we answer the question of which Canadian we would copy.
May 15, 2017
Gold Bond Educated Powder
Chris worries that he’s sketchy, Steve wants more Detective Munch, and the French give us something to celebrate.
May 08, 2017
It’s Not Easy Being Portuguese
Chris gets many things wrong, Steve wants to know what it means to be removed, and hunting for hedgehogs gets dangerous.
May 01, 2017
Cheez-Its and Jesus
Chris and Steve do a deep dive on 'New Warriors' #27, a Marvel comic book from 1992. That, plus a Rhode Island Rave and a roleplaying game that was banned by Boy Scouts.
April 24, 2017
Things That Fly Over Their Helmets
Chris shares his secret to Easter and a euphemism for smoking pot that Steve doesn’t like at all. Meanwhile, Steve slam-tilts pinball machines and explains why he’s happy with Louis C.K.
April 17, 2017
The PawSox of Professional Wrestling
Chris had a thing for a Purity girl, Steve had a thing for singing chipmunks, and they both have things to say about Chaotic Wrestling’s show in Woburn, Massachusetts.
April 10, 2017
The Golden Quill
Steve was stuck in a dungeon for three weeks, and all you got was this lousy t-shirt. That, plus Chris’ accident and a bus driver’s big mistake.
April 03, 2017
Other Potential Candidates
Steve has bones to pick with batteries, audio tapes, and warning labels and Chris has opinions about the redemptions of Roy Cohn, Adolf Hitler, and George W. Bush.
March 27, 2017
Why Are You Happy?
Chris takes a therapeutic dose of iron fist, Steve revisits Merlin’s Shop of Mystical Wonders, and a cruel fate is hypothesized for the Vice Homophobe of the United States.
March 20, 2017
Grand Theft Zelda
Chris and Steve are joined by special guest Ryan to talk about switches, vampire slayers, and sand getting everywhere.
March 13, 2017
I Don’t Want You Licking My Switch
Chris untangles the Terminator, Steve blows his nose, and Nintendo gets bitter.
March 06, 2017
Not When Nana’s Around
Chris wears shorts to the puppy place, Steve gets wet in line for the arcade bar, and we learn all about the wonderful world of slash fiction.
February 27, 2017
Nothing Turns Chris on More Than Elephant Feet
Chris has the sickies, Steve has an allergy, and we have some emails.
February 20, 2017
Your Post-Apocalypse Can Kiss My Ass
Steve plays D&D, Chris plays dumb, and Julian Edelman plays hot potato.
February 13, 2017
Steve has a new nickname for the president, Chris has another movie that he’s never seen, and a deleted scene from 'Groundhog Day' becomes a regular phantom menace.
February 06, 2017
Banging on a Xylophone
Steve attends a concert that disappoints, Chris watches a movie that doesn’t, and we talk about why the Patriots can beat animals but not big ones.
January 30, 2017
I Had Big Ones
Chris and Steve imagine the demise of The Orange Man and his Vice Orange. They also play video games, discuss the sex lives of fish, and agree that the great DM in the sky rolled all 18s when he created Joe Biden.
January 23, 2017
Extra Caring Chromosome
As Chris gets trolled and continues to eat the cookies, Steve just can’t stop gasping.
January 16, 2017
The Orange Administration
Chris gets mad at cute little kids, Steve deturdifies his beer, and we learn that The Orange Man might be the key to unlocking our Star Trek future.
January 09, 2017
Steve rings in the New Year with a guy who looks like Ken Marino, Chris celebrates the end of 2016 with a Disney movie marathon, and HBO announces their new series 'Vodka Gummi Bears.'
January 02, 2017
The Height of VHS Technology
Chris doesn’t want a second season of 'Westworld,' Steve doesn’t want to let it go, and we learn that there are people who’ve died on screen more than Sean Bean has.
December 26, 2016
The Original Alex Jones
Steve pines for Planters Cheez Balls, Chris confesses compassion for the Sith, and Doctor Who joins 'DuckTales.'
December 19, 2016
Old Wookiee Pants
Steve has a theory about the Orange Man, Chris has too much to say about ejaculation, and we learn what you can and can’t blame on George Lucas.
December 12, 2016
Chris thinks you should call them Nazis, Steve thinks you should call them fascists, and they think you should leggo your Eggo.
December 05, 2016
LingLong DingDong on Long Ring Long Land
Chris tries too hard to make it dirty, Steve pays tribute to the cinematic legend that was Robert Z’Dar, and China has an answer to the Amazon Echo.
November 28, 2016
A Who’s Who of Who’s About to Be Who
Steve is done with humans, Chris says 'The Walking Dead' is not Mickey Mouse, and The Orange Man continues to ruin the world.
November 21, 2016
Chris and Steve react to the 2016 United States Presidential Election.
November 14, 2016
Pixy Stix and a Whistle Ring
Chris is holding out for a hero, Steve is holding his vote for election day, and America is holding its breath as we decide who will be the 45th President of the United States.
November 07, 2016
Steve has a theory about alternate universes, Chris has a theory about Papa Smurf, and there is much ranting about our republic.
October 31, 2016
The Truth Fairy
Steve has a favorite scene from 'Gremlins 2,' Chris has a few things from the Internet to share with Steve, and one state in our union thinks that Oreos count as a Halloween candy.
October 25, 2016
Shut Up, Phil!
Steve tackles a Mega Maze, Chris tackles a stiff drink, and Ronald McDonald assembles an insanely elite clown posse.
October 17, 2016
Steve commutes, Chris has fun, and there’s no tax on slacks.
October 11, 2016
Liable to Commit Libel
Steve learns about accused murderess Amanda Knox, Chris learns about adult film star Donald Trump, and the world learns the about Princess Diana of Themyscira.
October 03, 2016
Swamps of Sadness
Chris finds a fully posable Supergirl in the world’s fanciest McDonalds, Steve finds problems with 'The NeverEnding Story' and with full-screen movies, and Lea Thompson is lurking around every corner.
September 26, 2016
Steve takes the beans, Clay Martin Croker kicks the bucket, and Chris wonders where Beyonce wanted us to put that ring.
September 19, 2016
The Crusades Were an Inside Job
Chris has no use for headphone jacks, Steve has no use for bees in his beverages, and a listener has a suggestion for how to name the next generation.
September 12, 2016
Chris doesn’t know why his children play the games they play, Steve isn’t sure what you even call these kids today, and it is entirely unclear how many clowns were inside the vehicle.
September 06, 2016
You Dumb A*****e
Steve saw Ween, Chris saw a trailer for a new documentary that aims to defend the prequels, and Gene Wilder saw paradise by simply looking around and seeing it.
August 30, 2016
Whilst Chris uncovers what happens to Jigglypuffs when you send them to the professor, Steve has himself a birthday full of spinners, joke men, fun spots, and space pizza.
August 22, 2016
Air Quote Abuser
Steve went to a wedding, Chris is going camping, and a judge has a Get Out of Jail Free card for Brendan Dassey.
August 15, 2016
Preach to Me, Brother!
Bob Costas is putting his pink eye on things again as Chris and Steve discuss the Games of the XXXI Olympiad, the death of The Big Lebowski, and more.
August 08, 2016
Scuzzy Dads and Mommy Tubes
Chris wonders how one might take the Popcorn Trick to the next level, Steve wonders what his quarters might buy him in the bathroom, and Donald Drumph wonders if Russia will help him hack the United States to pieces.
August 01, 2016
Can You Run Into Sodom?
Chris and Steve reflect on being 'HOT' for the second year in a row, replaying some of their best material from the past 52 episodes.
July 26, 2016
Steve has thoughts on the new 'Ghostbusters,' Chris has a dent in his new TV, and the Republican Party has TP for our bungholes.
July 18, 2016
Dratini in the Convenience Store
Steve’s been playing Pokémon Go, Chris is out of his element, and it’s dangerous to be black or blue in America.
July 11, 2016
The Church of Latter-Day Elvis
Steve hates Glenn Frey, Chris thinks America might be a tiny piece of hard feces, and Rod Stewart’s truck almost runs over a dog.
July 05, 2016
Steve rants about an arcade bar, Chris defends his habit of reading the last pages of books first, and Steven Wright is definitely not Casey Kasem.
June 28, 2016
Steve hates golf, Chris hates 'Seinfeld,' and Kevin Smith loves Michael Parks a little too much.
June 21, 2016
Jean-Claude Van Jams
Chris wonders why and how He-Man was a master of the universe, Steve wonders about Psylocke's development(s), and you wonder why there aren't show notes again.
June 13, 2016
Puppy Tag Team
Steve drinks a Falcon Punch, Chris reads a book, and there are sheep in the computer.
June 07, 2016
The Mealy Apple Look
Steve spends the weekend up the camp and Chris spends the show interrupting Steve’s stories.
May 31, 2016
Big Summer Ballbuster
Will Steve see 'Ghostbusters' twice? Will Chris see 'Star Trek Beyond' at all? And, most importantly, will Megan Fox ever wear a yellow jumpsuit?
May 23, 2016
Elizabeth of Queef
Steve drinks the worst Mai Tais ever, Chris has the geekiest Saturday ever, and Bono makes the dumbest Spanish-language counting mistake ever.
May 16, 2016
Buffy Barnes, The Winter Slayer
Steve sees the doctor, Chris wonders if Bowser had a special lady-friend, and the presumptive GOP nominee has himself a taco bowl.
May 09, 2016
Steve considers a big Seventies ‘What if?’, Chris considers the cultural ramifications of 'Police Academy,' and Obama drops the mic.
May 02, 2016
Apostle of Winwood
Steve sees a documentary about Market Basket, Chris knows a Coolio song by heart, and the guys discuss the deaths of Prince, Chyna, Doris Roberts, and Michelle McNamara.
April 25, 2016
Seann Willem Dafoe
Steve and Chris perform a close reading of the cinematic classic 'American Pie 2.'
April 18, 2016
Breathing Sausage Into Their Face
Steve karaokes for the unappreciative masses, Chris recounts his trip to 'Zootopia,' and Marky Mark sleeps with the women of Superman.
April 11, 2016
Pickled With Alcohol
Steve wonders where the sex robots are at, Chris defends 'Batman v. Superman,' and John Valby plays the Hu Ke Lau.
April 04, 2016
Especially With Kraft Singles
Chris tries to make coffee, Steve tries to defend Hulk Hogan, and listeners try to talk some sense into your two favorite chuckleheads.
March 28, 2016
The Chicago Conversation
Steve visits Chicago, Chris hosts a birthday party for 10-year-olds, and someone listens to Korn un-ironically.
March 22, 2016
Steve laments the loss of Patrice O’Neal, Chris defends the spectacular Spider-Man, and Kim Kardashian is free to bare her nipples in New Hampshire.
March 14, 2016
One for the Ages
Chris and Steve experience technical difficulties.
March 07, 2016
Don’t Frost It So Much
Steve has a problem with frosting, Chris is thinking too hard about Rachel McAdams, and Donald Trump is going to be president.
March 01, 2016
Over 27 Vitamins & Ingredients
Chris thinks Sony should #FreeKesha, Steve thinks it should snow more, and Donald Trump’s win in South Carolina has the guys wondering which country they should move to.
February 22, 2016
Six Nips Deep
Steve pioneers Flip-Off Fitness, Chris creates the Hamburger Cinematic Universe, and the guys discuss the death of Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia.
February 16, 2016
No Ponies for Anybody
Steve studies Japanese, Chris mutes everything, and Amy Schumer swears she’d never steal a joke.
February 08, 2016
Steve tells jokes in Portland, Chris wonders whether Dr. Ian Malcolm would end class early for a student in need, and the guys chat about the impending doom of the Iowa Caucuses.
February 02, 2016
Jonas Is in Your Beard
Chris and Steve are all over the place, talking Snowzilla 2016, Glenn Frey, Flint, Clitter, Deadpool, Gary Vaynerchuk, and more.
January 25, 2016
Yeah. Yeah? Yeah. Eh? No!
Chris finishes 'Making a Murderer,' Steve watches a Patriots game in a bar filled with infuriating young people, and more.
January 18, 2016
The Problem With Incest
Chris sees Disney on Ice, Steve gets sushi, David Bowie dies, and the guys discuss 'Making a Murderer.'
January 12, 2016
Mako, Like the Whale
Chris and Steve tackle time shifts and Tackleberry, mourn Mace Windu and merchandising, and debate which of them is the bigger dink.
January 04, 2016
Heavy on the Spoilers
Chris and Steve recap Christmas and review "Star Wars: The Force Awakens."
December 29, 2015
So He Could Go in the HOV Lane
Chris gets on Steve’s last nerve, Steve goes to Plant Night, and we’re joined by Chris’ brother John for a game of #ExplainAFilmPlotBadly.
December 22, 2015
I Don’t Like Offending People
Steve attends Chaotic Wrestling’s December 11 show at the Woburn Elks, and the guys spend nearly the entire show talking about it.
December 14, 2015
Another Straight Man
Chris and Steve discuss Kristen Stewart, Jessica Jones, 'The Cabin in the Woods,' and why they’re cautiously optimistic about 'Star Wars: The Force Awakens.'
December 07, 2015
The Hottest Guy in the Room
Steve saves Thanksgiving, Chris attends his twenty-year high school reunion, and the guys debate the parenting skills of David Seville.
November 30, 2015
You’re an Adverb
Chris and Steve discuss the pros and cons of the 69, an email detailing the many ways in which Chris was wrong about religion, and the reunions of both Ween and the Class of 1995.
November 23, 2015
Like the Porridge That Goldilocks Ate
Steve’s been sick, Chris doesn’t care about the world, and the Patriots have been cheating against one of them poor Manning boys again.
November 17, 2015
Immune to Eye Rolls
Chris and Steve talk 'Saturday Night Live,' Billy Corgan, the New England Patriots’ preternatural ability to win coin flips, the adult films their dads owned when the country was great, and more.
November 09, 2015
Chris and Steve recap their Halloween adventures, discuss the facial hair of Commander Will Riker, and try to determine how Steve’s forwarding address got so Woodburied.
November 02, 2015
A Deep Dive on Janeway
Chris and Steve talk "The Force Awakens," "Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey," the end of nudes in "Playboy," and about how, despite all their rage, they are still just rats in a cage.
October 26, 2015
The Later Part of the Early Part of the Turn of the Century
Chris and Steve discuss Dead Milkmen, 'Back to the Future, Part II,' Nintendo 64, and more.
October 20, 2015
A Chef’s Passion
Chris and Steve talk road trips, sexual innuendo, and putting money on the Cubbies.
October 12, 2015
Peter Parker Picked a Peck of Pickled Parents
Chris watches 'The Amazing Spider-Man 2' and admits to having a phase, Steve falls the heck out of his weekend, and the guys debate hearts vs. stars.
October 05, 2015
We’ve Never Kissed
Steve makes pilgrimages to IKEA and FedEx, Chris asks questions he already knows the answers to, and the guys discuss how each of them got the sickies this week.
September 28, 2015
Unless It’s a Dirty Hug
Chris and Steve talk board games, advertising, and moving, before addressing the important questions of Ahmed and his clock, what would happen if Chris met the president, and how the Patriots cheated this week.
September 22, 2015
Laughter Is Stupid
Chris and Steve argue about TV, bicker about breakfast cereal, and examine exactly how their New England Patriots cheated this week.
September 14, 2015
Call Me Cupcake
Chris and Steve discuss Kim Davis’ stance against gay marriage, the triumph of Tom Brady, the firing of Don Orsillo, and much, much more.
September 08, 2015
The Right to Bear Arms
Chris and Steve reveal the dumb things that landed them in detention. Then, they talk about summer camp movies, back to school time, and the on-air shootings at WDBJ this past week.
September 01, 2015
She Tolerates My Flatulence
Chris and Steve talk soda flavors, Steve’s birthday, and the miseducation of Harry Potter, before tackling news on Jared Fogle and Ashley Madison.
August 24, 2015
Then It Went Right Up Your Nose
Chris and Steve talk Ween, poetry slams, the rise of upscale hamburger joints, and what type of abs might the most pleasant to scissor.
August 17, 2015
It’s All Country!
As Steve prepares to see the Dean Ween Group, we learn how he hurt his ankle, why Chris wants more cunnilingus in his fiction, and what the guys thought of the GOP presidential debate they didn’t watch.
August 10, 2015
Hale-Bopp Was More Fun
Chris and Steve talk about boobs on pinball machines, balls on Transformers and trans men, and so much more.
August 03, 2015
Laden With Humdiddy
Chris and Steve reflect on being "HOT" for one whole year, replaying some of their best material along the way.
July 27, 2015
Fries and Ketchup for America
Chris and Steve talk karaoke, Amy Schumer, General Tso, and whether it’s the RMV or the DMV.
July 20, 2015
Once You're in the Rubber
Chris goes to the beach and to a mini high school reunion, while Steve goes bowling and eats a cookie.
July 13, 2015
A Song in His Heart
Chris and Steve talk about the genius of Paul Rudd, the idiocy of Donald Trump, and how traffic ruins everything.
July 06, 2015
Have You Ever Tried to Pull Apart a Grilled Cheese?
Chris and Steve talk about the death of Dick Van Patten, the second act of Jake Lloyd’s career, and Steve’s trip to Portland, Maine. That, plus gay marriage, farts, and an old photo of Chris’ Cub Scout cohorts.
June 29, 2015
The Next Time We Have James Earl Jones On
Chris and Steve talk about Christopher Lee, The General Lee, Rock’n Ribfest, and so much more.
June 22, 2015
Playing With Eunuchs
Chris and Steve discuss "Jurassic World" and the state of moviegoing today before debating whether or not Bernie Sanders is the name of an actual presidential candidate.
June 15, 2015
Two Levels Below GoBot
Chris and Steve recap Steve’s trip to Philadelphia. That, plus the reaction to Caitlyn Jenner and an analysis of 1980s cartoons and their 21st century live-action remakes.
June 08, 2015
Can Anybody Say Anything Anymore?
Steve prepares for a trip to Philadelphia by having ice cream for dinner, while Chris eats so much pizza that his farts begin to topple small children. That, plus microphones, offensive team names, and more.
June 01, 2015
Moist Week on the Water Channel
Chris and Steve discuss dadbod, Hollywood’s ‘hot daughter’ trend, the faces on American money, and more.
May 25, 2015
I Wasn't Trying to Be Funny
Chris and Steve school fools on how to pronounce local place names, then discuss the death penalty, sex amongst Pooh and Friends, and the best review of Chris’ acting career.
May 18, 2015
How It Ended up on Your Cheek
Chris and Steve discuss the return of Steve’s libido and Tom Brady’s deflated balls, plus their thoughts on what a Marvel movie by the Coen Brothers would look like.
May 11, 2015
It’s Not Sexy to Drown
Steve faces off with shingles, Chris defends his foley artist skills, and much, much more.
May 04, 2015
As We Shed
Steve gets hit on at karaoke, Chris’ daughter watches "Star Wars," and the boys go off on a tangent about the Iron Sheik while discussing the difference between learning lines and memorizing jokes.
April 27, 2015
The Jimmy Carter of the Apocalypse
Steve shares stories from the Red Sox Home Opener, Chris talks about reading his diary in front a live audience at “I Could Just Diary: Round 4,” and the boys talk about new trailers for “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” and “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice.”
April 20, 2015
My Privilege Was Showing
Chris and Steve talk about where the Wall would be if Greater Lowell were Westeros, then talk Red Sox Home Opener drunkenness, waiting in line for Amiibo, and more.
April 13, 2015
We Talked About This
Chris and Steve discuss Easter and other holidays Steve never remembers, then move on to current events, the case for a revolution, and much more.
April 06, 2015
I’m Sorry. Here’s Flowers.
Chris and Steve discuss Indiana’s ‘Religious Freedom’ bill and Ted Cruz’s run for president before Getting Local for Ya, reading more Mean Tweets, and going Horribly Off-Topic.
March 30, 2015
The Chickets Were Teap
Chris and Steve read mean tweets and email from their listeners, then talk about movies Chris watched over Spring Break and the TV shows they’ve binge-watched.
March 23, 2015
I Keep on Not Having Thoughts
Chris and Steve try to get listeners to mean-tweet them, then chat about cycling, big trucks, Pizzas of Destiny, Christy Turlington, the science of anti-vaccination, and more.
March 16, 2015
Earning the E Tag
Steve tells jokes and Chris ruins them. Then the guys talk about something Chris did for fun (and might do again). That, plus so much more.
March 09, 2015
The Problem of the Prequels
Chris and Steve talk Star Wars viewing order, the hullabaloo over the cover of the 2015 "Sports Illustrated" swimsuit issue, and the death of Leonard Nimoy.
March 02, 2015
Give It To Me Like That
Chris and Steve talk about vocal fry, Steve’s visit to Bit Fest 2: Electronic Boogaloo, and who Donatello is going down on. That, plus hitting 30, listener email, and Chris trying (and failing) to have fun.
February 23, 2015
A Tupperware Party, Only With Dildos
Chris and Steve present a grab bag episode that is largely about grabbing one’s bag (including grabbing one’s self in the interest of in vitro fertilisation). That, plus the Blizzard IV, taxes & health insurance, and taking a hammer to one’s old stuff.
February 16, 2015
The Seahawks Haven’t Thrown An Interception Yet
Chris and Steve recap Super Bowl XLIX and its commercials, then talk about Legend of Zelda on TV, Kate Upton dancing, and proper care of the U.S. flag.
February 09, 2015
The Shriveled Little Scientist Inside Gronk
Just hours before Super Bowl XLIX, Chris and Steve talk about the Big Game, blizzards, drinking, and "Fight Club."
February 02, 2015
I'm Not a Big Marmalade Fan to Begin With
Chris and Steve talk about musicals as turds, movies that used to be good, and about the deflated balls of their local football franchise.
January 26, 2015
Steve wonders whether Chris had any fun in college, then the guys talk about Pixar, video game completionism, and finding porn in the woods.
January 19, 2015
The Yeah, Right Story
Chris, Steve, and special guest Leo talk about Leo’s trip to Nepal, plus New England, karaoke, and the many reasons Steve is right.
January 12, 2015
I Wanted a Scanner Because of WEIRD SCIENCE
Chris and Steve talk about Steve’s trip to Montreal and who they’d want to showrun the TRUMAN SHOW version of their lives.
January 05, 2015
He Knew What Was Coming
Chris, Steve, and Chris’ brother John discuss accusations of Chris’ onanism, plus Steve and John’s upcoming trip to Canada.
December 29, 2014
That’s How North Korea Wins
Chris, Steve, and special guest Matt celebrate the podcast’s 21st birthday by sharing stories of their early drinking experiences.
December 23, 2014
Stop Calling Me Uncle Steve
Chris and Steve discuss American heroes Button Gwinnett and Vanilla Ice, British super-spy James Bond, literary magazines, parody movies, and films that are too arty for their own good.
December 15, 2014
Never Play With Your Brother’s Tandy
Chris and Steve talk video games, over-sharing, rule-breaking, fathering love children in college, and who listeners come to the show for.
December 08, 2014
Kiki-Jiki Mirror Breaker’s Sopping Orifice
Chris and Steve discuss words and phrases that offend their listeners. Then, Chris tells the story of how the Internet cost him his virginity. That, and Thanksgiving.
December 01, 2014
Choosy Moms Choose GIFs
Chris and Steve chat about the comic book speculator boom of the 1990s, then trade their own personal origin stories.
November 24, 2014
Chris and Steve discuss bathroom floods, banning words, and where they would start over in their lives if given the chance.
November 17, 2014
I Haven’t Sucked It Out Yet
Chris and Steve talk about #GamerGate, the biggest mistake made by Barack Obama, Googling yourself, and the movies they haven’t seen.
November 10, 2014
Eyeing My Dad’s Bananas
Chris and Steve talk about where a man’s anger—their anger, in particular—comes from.
November 03, 2014
Feed the Clown
Steve regales us with stories of his trip to Seattle and Chris explains what a one-on-one talk booth is.
October 27, 2014
Something That Resembled Music
Steve and Chris are joined by Dan Reynolds to finish their chat about the history of Dan and Steve’s band, The New Sweethearts. They also go off on a tangent about bullying and read listener emails on Neutral Milk Hotel, Robert Jordan, George R.R. Martin, and Steve’s five-car pile-up in Canada.
October 20, 2014
Oh, You’re One of Those Sweethearts?
Steve and Chris are joined by Dan Reynolds to talk about the genesis of Steve and Dan’s band, The New Sweethearts, and about other bands from their high school days (including Lift/Orpheus, Crumb, and Soma).
October 13, 2014
You Brought Their Breasts Into It
Steve regales us with stories of his trip to Canada and Chris asks tangential questions along the way. There’s a five-car accident, an anti-Semitic homeless person, and a thing on Chris’ finger that might be rabies, Ebola, or just a blood blister.
October 06, 2014
As Petty Larceny as You Can Get
With Chris’ daughter Kaylee just out of earshot, Chris and Steve try to keep things clean for once. They chat about the bits they did on their college radio shows, the donuts one of them stole in high school, Steve’s upcoming trip to Toronto, and whether or not George Carlin was right about the potential for rape jokes to be funny.
September 29, 2014
Gwyneth Paltrow’s Head
Steve wants to be cyborg and Chris wants to know which of his five limbs he’d replace first. Chris has never drawn an erect penis, so Steve teaches him how. And, why is it that wrestlers are always dying?
September 22, 2014
The Same Amount of Naked
Chris and Steve talk about what kind of guy they would go gay for, create a lot of post-production work for Chris when they start dropping names they weren’t supposed to, discuss why a winter trip to Montreal might be in store for one of them, and wonder about the differing laws for striptease in the States and in Canada.
September 15, 2014
The Steveing of Jobs
In the midst of a major thunderstorm, Chris and Steve exchange stories about North Carolina, including Chris’ Internet “girlfriend” from UNCG and Steve’s misadventures with the Tar Heel State’s DMV, then talk about what it means to Steve a job and why Chris hasn’t done that much.
September 08, 2014
You Wear Your Balls on Your Belt
Chris and Steve chat about how they survived their senior years of college, how Steve would do in one of Chris’ classes, and why election season proves the human experiment is over.
September 01, 2014
Because I’m a Man and You’re OK With That
Curmudgeons Chris and Steve talk about speeding tickets as revenue streams, who will run for president in the post-social media age, bad jokes about Genesis, problems with weight, and whether they’d rather have a man or a woman performing their rectal exams.
August 25, 2014
Urinal Etiquette and Suicide Prevention
Chris and Steve talk about their current and past addictions, their opinions on urinal etiquette, and about the death of Robin Williams.
August 18, 2014
With No Lady to Help Me Wipe My Bottom
Chris and Steve talk about video games, Jake Lloyd movies, online dating, the humor to be found in names inspired by a city’s beloved canal system, the many things Steve is done with, and much more.
August 12, 2014
I’ve Been Listening to Steely Dan for 10 Minutes. Where’s My Hawk Sound?!?
E. Christopher Clark and Steve Woodbury launch their podcast with an episode that’s theoretically going to be about Market Basket and the plight of their employees.
August 04, 2014