Illuminate Podcast: Shining Light on the Darkness of Pornography

Illuminate Podcast: Shining Light on the Darkness of Pornography

By Illuminate Podcast
Join therapist and author Geoff Steurer as he interviews experts, authors, individuals, couples, and other guests about how to protect and heal individuals, marriages, families, and communities from the negative effects of pornography and other harmful media. Many of the guests are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and speak from a spiritual and Christian perspective. However, the information in these interviews applies across religions and cultures, as the negative impact of pornography is a human problem.
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How betrayal trauma affects women's spiritual lives - Dr. Carmel White - Episode 40
The Trust Building Bootcamp pre-launch 50% discount! http://bit.ly/trustbootcamp I interview Dr. Carmel White, a researcher and author, who co-authored a book called “Love and Betrayal”, which is a collection of research and stories detailing the experience of what it’s like to be betrayed by a partner’s pornography use. In this interview, we discuss the impact of betrayal trauma on women's spiritual lives. She shares ideas and ways to spiritually support women in trauma for those who work closely with betrayed women.  You can purchase Dr. Carmel White’s book here: https://amzn.to/2NGXOxU The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com Please donate to support the Illuminate Podcast: https://anchor.fm/illuminate-podcast/support I have also created audio and video courses to help support individuals and couples in marriage, addiction, and betrayal trauma recovery at www.geoffsteurer.com/store
46:58
September 12, 2019
What betrayed women want everyone to know
Please donate to support the Illuminate Podcast: https://anchor.fm/illuminate-podcast/support The Trust Building Bootcamp pre-launch 50% discount! http://bit.ly/trustbootcamp I interview Dr. Carmel White, a researcher and author, who co-authored a book called “Love and Betrayal”, which is a collection of research and stories detailing the experience of what it’s like to be betrayed by a partner’s pornography use. In this interview, we discuss what betrayed women really need people to understand about betrayal trauma. Betrayed women face tremendous uncertainty and it’s critical that those who love and support them don’t create more confusion and stress.  You can purchase Dr. Carmel White’s book here: https://amzn.to/2NGXOxU Additional Resources for betrayed women: https://www.lifestarstgeorge.com/media https://salifeline.org https://utahcoalition.org/media/ The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com I have also created audio and video courses to help support individuals and couples in marriage, addiction, and betrayal trauma recovery at www.geoffsteurer.com/store
42:39
August 29, 2019
Finding Peace When Anxious Or Troubled - Geoff Steurer
This is a live recording of a Young Single Adult Devotional for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints presented by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT. Geoff speaks on how to find peace when anxious or troubled and shares personal stories about spiritual patterns that have helped him find peace in his own life. He presented this devotional address at the Dixie State University Institute Building of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in St. George, Utah on Sunday, June 30, 2019. Subscribe to Geoff and Jody Steurer's marriage education vlog: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCc05gV4t9A0B8-TDT1EfWhQ?view_as=subscriber You can purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery Geoff Steurer's Bio: Since 1999, I’ve been helping couples and individuals improve their most important relationships. It has been deeply rewarding to watch clients move out of patterns that have held them and their loved ones back from experiencing their full relationship potential. I completed a masters degree in marriage and family therapy at Auburn University in Auburn, Alabama. I also hold a bachelors degree from Brigham Young University in communications studies. Following my graduate work, I worked in community behavioral health where I gained experience working with a wide-range of mental health concerns affecting individuals, couples, and families. This experience helped me discover my strong interest in working with couples, especially couples affected by pornography addiction, affairs, and other betrayals. I eventually became affiliated with the LifeStar Network and moved to St. George, UT in 2006 where I opened up a private practice and started the LifeStar of St. George program. In 2009, I created the group practice Alliant Counseling and Education, which is home to a team of highly trained therapists who are specialists in their chosen areas of expertise. I have continued to seek advanced training in both pornography/sexual addiction treatment as well as Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT). My focus in both my couples work as well as the group work in the LifeStar program is helping individuals and couples heal the patterns of attachment in their relationships. I am the co-author of the book “Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity“, with Dr. Mark Chamberlain. I also recorded the 6-part series “Strengthening Recovery Through Strengthening Marriage: Healing from Pornography Addiction” with Dr. Kevin Skinner. I also was featured as a guest expert in the documentary "The Heart of the Matter". I am an affiliate director in the LifeStar Network. I have co-authored many of the LifeStar Network workbooks. I also write a weekly column for the St. George News Online and the LDS online magazine Meridian Magazine. I frequently present at state and national conferences on the subjects of marriage, sexual addiction recovery, and other related topics. I was the co-founder of the Southern Utah conference put on by the Utah Coalition Against Pornography and have served as conference chair four times. I also provide workshops, trainings, and other presentations for local groups and clergy. Please contact me if I can assist your organization. I have been married since 1996 to my wife, Jody, and we are the parents of four children. I am active member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I was raised in Oklahoma and have lived all over the United States and spent two years in the Dominican Republic serving a volunteer mission for my church. I enjoy working with people of all faiths and backgrounds. In my spare time, I like to hike, camp, listen to and play music, photography, and hang out with my family.
43:52
July 2, 2019
Six guideposts of true recovery from addiction - Geoff Steurer - Episode 37
How does someone prove that they're truly healing from a pornography or sexual addiction? In this episode, Geoff Steurer shares six guideposts that indicate true healing is most likely happening. Even though the truth of someone's healing process is deeply personal and can't be measured by a list, these six areas of healing are consistently present in the thousands of people Geoff has guided over the past twenty-plus years of working as a licensed marriage and family therapist. The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery Geoff Steurer's Bio: Since 1999, I’ve been helping couples and individuals improve their most important relationships. It has been deeply rewarding to watch clients move out of patterns that have held them and their loved ones back from experiencing their full relationship potential. I completed a masters degree in marriage and family therapy at Auburn University in Auburn, Alabama. I also hold a bachelors degree from Brigham Young University in communications studies. Following my graduate work, I worked in community behavioral health where I gained experience working with a wide-range of mental health concerns affecting individuals, couples, and families. This experience helped me discover my strong interest in working with couples, especially couples affected by pornography addiction, affairs, and other betrayals. I eventually became affiliated with the LifeStar Network and moved to St. George, UT in 2006 where I opened up a private practice and started the LifeStar of St. George program. In 2009, I created the group practice Alliant Counseling and Education, which is home to a team of highly trained therapists who are specialists in their chosen areas of expertise. I have continued to seek advanced training in both pornography/sexual addiction treatment as well as Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT). My focus in both my couples work as well as the group work in the LifeStar program is helping individuals and couples heal the patterns of attachment in their relationships. I am the co-author of the book “Love You, Hate the Porn: Healing a Relationship Damaged by Virtual Infidelity“, with Dr. Mark Chamberlain. I also recorded the 6-part series “Strengthening Recovery Through Strengthening Marriage: Healing from Pornography Addiction” with Dr. Kevin Skinner. I also was featured as a guest expert in the documentary "The Heart of the Matter". I am an affiliate director in the LifeStar Network. I have co-authored many of the LifeStar Network workbooks. I also write a weekly column for the St. George News Online and the LDS online magazine Meridian Magazine. I frequently present at state and national conferences on the subjects of marriage, sexual addiction recovery, and other related topics. I was the co-founder of the Southern Utah conference put on by the Utah Coalition Against Pornography and have served as conference chair four times. I also provide workshops, trainings, and other presentations for local groups and clergy. Please contact me if I can assist your organization. I have been married since 1996 to my wife, Jody, and we are the parents of four children. I am active member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I was raised in Oklahoma and have lived all over the United States and spent two years in the Dominican Republic serving a volunteer mission for my church. I enjoy working with people of all faiths and backgrounds. In my spare time, I like to hike, camp, listen to and play music, photography, and hang out with my family.
21:14
May 12, 2019
Let's practice healing trauma - 2 exercises with Katy Willis - Episode 36
In this episode I continue my interview with Katy Willis and we give you the chance to experience components of yoga for yourself. You just have to double cross your heart that you will save it for a time when you are not driving, operating heavy machinery, or other activities that require your undivided attention :-) If you haven't listened to Episode 35, please go back and listen so you can have foundational information on the practices she is going to share. Resources: 1. Kirtan Kriya instructions: https://www.3ho.org/files/pdfs/KirtanKriya.pdf http://alzheimersprevention.org/research/kirtan-kriya-yoga-exercise/ https://kripalu.org/resources/incredible-power-kirtan-kriya-conversation-brain-health-and-longevity-dr-chris-walling https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4927889/ Katy will be offering two free trial yoga classes on http://btr.org (Betrayal Trauma Recovery) for any women. The two trial classes are free to all women, not just women who have a btr subscription. The classes will be Saturday, April 27 and Saturday, May 4 @ 8 am MST. She will start offering the Prana I Yoga Therapy course this fall in Logan, Utah at Addo Recovery. You can follow Katy here to learn more about her yoga classes online and in Utah: http://bestillservices.blogspot.com/p/christ-centered-yoga.html And, Katy's mentor, Sariah, offers online pre-recorded trauma yoga classes for $12/month here: https://backpocketyoga.com/register/ Books to consider for further personal reading: The Body Keep the Score, by Bessel van der Kolk MD Meditation as Medicine, by Dr. Dharma Singh Khalsa and Cameron Stauth Hatha Yoga Illustrated, by Martin L. Kirk, Brooke Boon, et al. The breath/brain article (qz.com/quartzy/1132986/neuro…t9mVqrPJ48AZVt7-NGL9Y) Eye focus/brain activation (www.3ho.org/kundalini-yoga/eye-focus) Katy's favorite Kundalini yoga website (www.3ho.org) 5. Instructions for basic Hatha yoga poses (backpocketyoga.com/how-to-pose/) 6. Mantra translation website (www.spiritvoyage.com/mantra) Katy's Bio: Katy Willis spends most of her time as a homeschooling mamma to her 4 energetic children. Katy and her husband, Mark, hope to add to their family through adoption. She graduated from BYU-Idaho with an Associate's degree in Nursing in 2005, as well as a Bachelor's degree in Music in 2006. Katy currently runs her own small business called Be Still Services. Her mission is to help support individuals physically, mentally/emotionally, and spiritually in the aftermath of trauma so they can be still and find Jesus Christ. Katy has retired from working on the cardiac floor; however, is using her nursing skills again, but this time in brain wellness as a Quantum Neuro Reset Therapy (QNRT) Practitioner. QNRT is part of an emerging branch of the medical field called Quantum Neurobiology. She trained with Sariah at BackPocket Yoga for her 200 hour Hatha Yoga Teacher Training and Prana I course. Katy is a certified Karma Kids Yoga instructor. Additionally, she has studied with Felice at Tree of Life for Kundalini Yoga. She dreams of opening a brain wellness center in Northern Utah some day. Jesus Christ has been her rock through healing from betrayal trauma after her husband's relapse with pornography addiction, as well as during high-risk pregnancies, miscarriages, and navigating through the world of adoption. The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
27:35
April 27, 2019
Healing Trauma Through Yoga - Katy Willis - Episode 35
In this episode, I interview Katy Willis and discuss how the body can be affected by trauma. We explore common changes to the brain, and basic options to help balance the brain again in the aftermath of trauma. We go into depth about the science behind yoga, and how it works for trauma healing. Resources: Books to consider for further personal reading: The Body Keep the Score, by Bessel van der Kolk MD Meditation as Medicine, by Dr. Dharma Singh Khalsa and Cameron Stauth Hatha Yoga Illustrated, by Martin L. Kirk, Brooke Boon, et al. The breath/brain article (https://qz.com/quartzy/1132986/neuroscientists-have-identified-how-exactly-a-deep-breath-changes-your-mind/?fbclid=IwAR1V8xEn2C4Dbv15nW5P6g8ZolSMyLT_7u9FaQt9mVqrPJ48AZVt7-NGL9Y) Eye focus/brain activation (https://www.3ho.org/kundalini-yoga/eye-focus) Katy's favorite Kundalini yoga website (https://www.3ho.org) 5. Instructions for basic Hatha yoga poses (https://backpocketyoga.com/how-to-pose/) 6. Mantra translation website (http://www.spiritvoyage.com/mantra) Katy's Bio: Katy Willis spends most of her time as a homeschooling mamma to her 4 energetic children. Katy and her husband, Mark, hope to add to their family through adoption. She graduated from BYU-Idaho with an Associate's degree in Nursing in 2005, as well as a Bachelor's degree in Music in 2006. Katy currently runs her own small business called Be Still Services. Her mission is to help support individuals physically, mentally/emotionally, and spiritually in the aftermath of trauma so they can be still and find Jesus Christ. Katy has retired from working on the cardiac floor; however, is using her nursing skills again, but this time in brain wellness as a Quantum Neuro Reset Therapy (QNRT) Practitioner. QNRT is part of an emerging branch of the medical field called Quantum Neurobiology. She trained with Sariah at BackPocket Yoga for her 200 hour Hatha Yoga Teacher Training and Prana I course. Katy is a certified Karma Kids Yoga instructor. Additionally, she has studied with Felice at Tree of Life for Kundalini Yoga. She dreams of opening a brain wellness center in Northern Utah some day. Jesus Christ has been her rock through healing from betrayal trauma after her husband's relapse with pornography addiction, as well as during high-risk pregnancies, miscarriages, and navigating through the world of adoption. The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
47:14
April 11, 2019
When is it safe to do couples therapy in recovery? - Jeff Ford and Geoff Steurer - Episode 34
The discovery of pornography and other sexual secrets is a trauma that throws most couples into a tailspin. The tendency is to rally around the marriage and do everything possible to save the marriage. But, is that really the best first-line approach? In today's episode, Jeff Ford and Geoff Steurer, both licensed marriage and family therapists and co-directors of the LifeStar of St. George sexual addiction and betrayal trauma recovery program, talk about critical considerations to make when determining the best time to begin working with a couple during addiction recovery. The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
28:55
March 28, 2019
Mindfulness 101 - Taylor Chambers, LMFT - Episode 33
Taylor Chambers, licensed marriage and family therapist, shares an important recovery and healing concept: mindfulness. Find out what it is, why it matters, how it can be developed, and what you can do to start practicing this skill. Taylor is a licensed marriage and family therapist. Taylor graduated with a bachelor's degree in Family Science from Brigham Young University and then obtained a master's degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Abilene Christian University. Taylor's career has focused on treating sexual addiction, depression, and anxiety, especially with teens, young adult men, and their families. Taylor is the founder of Porn-Resilient Parenting, and currently works with LifeStar St. George and with Forte Strong, a failure-to-launch program. He enjoys helping people grow as well as reading, hiking, and birding. The most important thing in Taylor's world is his family. Download the free Porn-Resilient Family assessment at www.taylorjchambers.com and learn more about the upcoming parenting workshop. The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
26:58
March 14, 2019
Help your children become resilient against pornography - Taylor Chambers, LMFT - Episode 32
In this interview, Taylor Chambers, licensed marriage and family therapist, shares his approach to helping families cultivate resilience to pornography. - Learn why a prevention mindset is not enough - Discover what steps your family can take to be more resilient - Includes resources that can support you in this process. Download the free Porn-Resilient Family assessment at taylorjchambers.com and learn more about the upcoming parenting workshop. The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
29:03
February 27, 2019
Sexual Wholeness in Marriage - Michelle Linford - Episode 31
I interview Michelle Linford, the founder and administrator for LDS Hope and Healing, on the subject of sexual wholeness in marriage. Couples in recovery from pornography / sexual addiction and betrayal trauma often have questions and struggles around how to bring sexual wholeness to their marriages. We discuss: - How to seek true principles to guide the discussion as a couple - How to spot counterfeit and harmful information about healthy sexuality - How each person in the relationship is responsible for developing their own personal wholeness so they can offer themselves fully to their relationship. - Understanding the difference between fragmentation of ourselves in the sexual relationship versus being a whole and complete person. More on Michelle's background: Michelle's online volunteer work took an unexpected turn in late 2011 when search engine data showed the desperate need many LDS women had for help and support because of the sexual addiction/compulsion of a loved one. In response to that need, in January 2012, Michelle created HopeandHealingLDS.com (a blog and private forum) with the belief that if women knew they weren't alone, had others with whom they could connect, and had resources and information available to them, real healing could begin. Her motto was: "Let's use the tool that has brought so much pain to bring hope and healing to people!" In addition, inspired by her research about addiction recovery and the hope-filled stories of recovery from addicts and loved ones alike, Michelle chose to do 12-step work in her own life to find healing from shame, perfectionism, and fear-based living. She has been participating regularly in the Church’s 12-step program for six years, and is currently a facilitator in ARP. Michelle has a bachelor's degree in Psychology and an MBA, with an emphasis in organizational behavior and change. She is the Executive Director of EPIK Deliberate Digital, and is a member of the prevention task force (the Safeguard Alliance) for the National Center on Sexual Exploitation. Michelle and her husband, Matt, are the grateful parents of three, beginning the tender stage of launching their children into the world. In addition to being an ARP facilitator, Michelle also is grateful to serve as a facilitator in the Church's Self-Reliance Services program. Additional Resources from Michelle www.hopeandhealinglds.com/2017/02/14/o…e-resources/ Slides link (this was a presentation last February on dating in a pornified world at a BYU Women's Services conference last year): wsr.byu.edu/sites/default/files…wer%20-%20Final.pdf This is a podcast with LDS Perspectives www.ldsperspectives.com/tag/michelle-linford/ ldsmag.com/author/michelle-linford/ realintent.org/out-of-the-corner/ realintent.org/healing/ This is a compilation of thoughts and resources that assimilate learning from her role at EPIK, at HopeAndHealing (including all that research), and in her own personal experience in 12-step as a participant, sponsor, and facilitator. docs.google.com/document/d/1dn9ny…/edit?usp=sharing The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction. Learn more at http://www.lifestarstgeorge.com You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
57:41
February 13, 2019
The power of group therapy - Forest Benedict - Episode 30
This episode features an interview with Forest Benedict, LMFT, SATP where we discuss group therapy for treatment of pornography / sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. In this episode, we discuss: - Why group treatment is often difficult for people - The definition of group therapy and how it works - How group therapy helps people heal their attachment wounds - The different types of therapy groups - How group can be a “classroom for connection” - Why group can create ongoing accountability for recovery - How group can be a bridge back to a relationship with God. Group resources mentioned in the show: www.forestbenedict.com www.lifestarnetwork.com www.salifeline.org http://arp.lds.org Forest Benedict, LMFT, SATP, is the author of the highly-acclaimed book Life After Lust: Stories & Strategies for Sex & Pornography Addiction Recovery (www.amazon.com/Life-After-Lust-S…1487134790&sr=8-1). Forest uses online group therapy to guide sexually addicted individuals through recovery, serving all of California (forestbenedict.com/online-program-details/). He leads sexual addiction workshops and co-facilitates intensives with LifeSTAR Sacramento (lifestarsacramento.org/team-view/forest-benedict/). Forest is the Program Coordinator of the Sexual Addiction Treatment Provider program at Mid-America Nazarene University, training therapists to do sexual addiction work (www.mnu.edu/graduate/programs/s…rtification-program). He is a husband and father who is in recovery. To work with Forest, email him at forest@forestbenedict.com. Check out his website forestbenedict.com for additional recovery related resources . To learn about Forest’s recovery story, click here: forestbenedict.com/2017/03/17/cele…-gifts-for-you/ Additional links: Please follow Forest on the following platforms: Newsletter: us14.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=60…&id=b625e28c00 Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCOx7994oK_wpXKchrO9GdtA Blog: forestbenedict.com/blog/ Twitter: twitter.com/ForestGB Facebook: www.facebook.com/ForestGBenedict Instagram: www.instagram.com/forestbenedictlmft/ Pinterest: www.pinterest.co.uk/forestbenedict/ Please SHARE this valuable content with others. The Illuminate Podcast is sponsored by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a recovery program for couples and individual impacted by pornography addiction and betrayal trauma. Visit www.lifestarstgeorge.com for the next workshop and other resources. You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
36:15
January 31, 2019
Self-care for men in recovery from addiction - Forest Benedict - Episode 29
I interview Forest Benedict, LMFT, SATP about how men in recovery from pornography and sexual addiction can care for themselves in long-term recovery. He teaches that men with addictions are "masters of self-neglect" and don't have habits of taking good care of themselves. He is also in recovery himself and shares both his clinical and personal wisdom about how to build a strong self-care program. Forest Benedict, LMFT, SATP, is the author of the highly-acclaimed book Life After Lust: Stories & Strategies for Sex & Pornography Addiction Recovery (https://www.amazon.com/Life-After-Lust-Strategies-Pornography/dp/0998468215/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1487134790&sr=8-1). Forest uses online group therapy to guide sexually addicted individuals through recovery, serving all of California (https://forestbenedict.com/online-program-details/). He leads sexual addiction workshops and co-facilitates intensives with LifeSTAR Sacramento (http://lifestarsacramento.org/team-view/forest-benedict/). Forest is the Program Coordinator of the Sexual Addiction Treatment Provider program at Mid-America Nazarene University, training therapists to do sexual addiction work (https://www.mnu.edu/graduate/programs/sexual-addictions-treatment-provider-certification-program). He is a husband and father who is in recovery. To work with Forest, email him at forest@forestbenedict.com. Check out his website https://forestbenedict.com for additional recovery related resources . To learn about Forest’s recovery story, click here: https://forestbenedict.com/2017/03/17/celebrating-13-years-free-from-porn-addiction-with-2-gifts-for-you/ Additional links: Please follow Forest on the following platforms: Newsletter: https://us14.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=606ca501b3df1322f502c4672&id=b625e28c00 Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOx7994oK_wpXKchrO9GdtA Blog: https://forestbenedict.com/blog/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/ForestGB Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ForestGBenedict Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/forestbenedictlmft/ Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.co.uk/forestbenedict/ Please SHARE this valuable content with others. The Illuminate Podcast is sponsored by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a recovery program for couples and individual impacted by pornography addiction and betrayal trauma. Visit www.lifestarstgeorge.com for the next workshop and other resources. You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: http://geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
32:12
January 19, 2019
Changing the pornography discussion with our kids - Dr. Dean Busby - Episode 28
Our kids are tired of the same "porn is bad" talk and need better information from us on how to navigate the sex-saturated world that surrounds them. Dr. Dean Busby, director of the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University, co-authored a book called "A Better Way to Teach Kids About Sex", which includes a chapter on how to have a better conversation about pornography. In this episode, we cover: * What conversations need to happen before you can have an anti-pornography talk with your children. * Why jumping into a conversation about pornography without preparation is harmful to children. * How we unintentionally teach our children that sex is shameful. * Why taking an alarmist approach toward pornography prevents kids from being open. * How to validate healthy sexual attraction while setting limits with lust. * How to create a meaningful discussion vs. a one-sided lecture about pornography. * Three talking points that are critical to cover when talking about pornography. * Paying attention to your child’s personality and communication style so you can have a more productive conversation. You can purchase the book "A Better Way to Teach Kids About Sex" here: www.amazon.com/Better-Way-Teach-…veASIN=1629723738 Dean M. Busby is the director of the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University. Recently he has been teaching the healthy sexuality in marriage course at BYU. His research has garnered university and national awards and been funded by federal and state grants and has been presented to scholarly and lay audiences around the world. The Illuminate Podcast is sponsored by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a recovery program for couples and individual impacted by pornography addiction and betrayal trauma. Visit www.lifestarstgeorge.com for the next workshop and other resources. You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
32:42
January 2, 2019
A Better Way to Teach Your Kids About Sex - Dr. Dean Busby - Episode 27
The ways we've attempted talking to our kids about sex often leave everyone feeling uncomfortable and fearful. The focus is often on what NOT to do instead of teaching joyful truths about bodies, relationships, and bonding. In this episode, I interview Dr. Dean Busby, the director of the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University, who is one of four co-authors of the new book, "A Better Way to Teach Kids About Sex". In this episode, we discuss: - How to move past setting up "the talk" and, instead, helping your child feel comfortable talking about sex, sexuality, bodies, and relationships in a loving and safe relationship. - How this conversation can help prepare your child to have these same kinds of conversations down the road with their future spouse. - The myth that talking about sexuality encourages sexual behavior - Why ignorance around sexuality is no longer bliss...especially in today's world. - How to promote healthy attitudes around sexuality so our kids are comfortable discussing these topics in the future in their own marriage and family. - Why traditional metaphors around sex are a poor substitute for more direct conversation and can actually do more harm than good. - How we can develop a more playful and joyful attitude about sexuality without being inappropriate. You can purchase the book "A Better Way to Teach Kids About Sex" here: https://www.amazon.com/Better-Way-Teach-Kids-About/dp/1629723738/ref=as_sl_pc_tf_til?tag=alliacounsa03-20&linkCode=w00&linkId=8c414345596d94f864764e401ece3176&creativeASIN=1629723738 Dean M. Busby is the director of the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University. Recently he has been teaching the healthy sexuality in marriage course at BYU. His research has garnered university and national awards and been funded by federal and state grants and has been presented to scholarly and lay audiences around the world. The Illuminate Podcast is sponsored by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a recovery program for couples and individual impacted by pornography addiction and betrayal trauma. Visit www.lifestarstgeorge.com for the next workshop and other resources. You can also purchase a six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery
33:27
December 22, 2018
Your Brain on Porn - An Interview with Brain Surgeon Dr. Don Hilton - Episode 26
You can purchase the six-hour audio course on healing your marriage from pornography ($29) here: https://geoff-steurer.mykajabi.com/p/marriage-recovery In this episode I interview Dr. Don Hilton, a world-renowned neurosurgeon and expert on the impact of pornography on the brain. He is the author of "He Restoreth My Soul: Understanding and Breaking the Chemical and Spiritual Chains of Pornography Addiction Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ". In this episode, we discuss: - Is pornography really an addiction? - What pornography does to the brain and why pornography is so addictive. - The different parts of the brain that are impacted by addiction - How the brain becomes out of balance so it’s more difficult to resist the addiction. - How can brain heals from the impact of pornography. - A challenge to the belief that it’s religious shame that causes pornography problems, not pornography itself. - How modern pornography is exploiting our mirror neurons to create more addiction. - The difference between “viewing" pornography versus “participating" in pornography and how future innovations in virtual reality and haptic devices will make pornography even more addictive. - Why we can’t minimize the need to do more in-depth treatment with individuals participating in pornography Biography Donald L. Hilton, Jr. M.D. graduated summa cum laude with a bachelor’s degree in biology from Lamar University, and cum laude with a medical degree from the University of Texas, where he was elected to Alpha Omega Alpha Medical Honor Society. He was trained as a neurosurgeon at the University of Tennessee, and is a clinical associate professor of neurosurgery at the University of Texas Medical School at San Antonio. Dr. Hilton speaks nationally and internationally in the field of minimally invasive spinal surgery, and has published book chapters, peer-reviewed journal papers, and developed techniques widely used in this subspecialty. He is currently listed in Best Doctors in America, and as a Texas Super Doctor and is a fellow of the American College of Surgeons and the American Association of Neurological Surgeons. Dr. Hilton also publishes and speaks on the subject of pornography and sexual addiction. He and his wife received the “Guardian of the Light” award from the anti-pornography organization Lighted Candle Society in 2008, where Dr. Hilton gave the keynote address, “Pornography and the Brain: Understanding the Addiction.” He authored the book He Restoreth My Soul, which explores the effects of pornography on the brain, along with spiritual paradigms of healing. His publications on the subject include Pornography Addiction: A Neuroscience Perspective. Surgical Neurology International, manuscript in press, Donald L. Hilton Jr., MD, Clark Watts, MD, JD. Slavemaster: How Pornography Drugs and Changes Your Brain. Salvo Magazine. Hagelin: Addiction to Porn is Real, Destructive. Washington Times “As a Swallowed Bait: How Pornography Addicts and Changes the Brain.” BYU Law School, “Stand for the Family” Symposium. He and his wife, Jana, are the parents of five children and have three grandchildren. Contact Dr. Hilton at dhiltonjr@sbcglobal.net The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program to help couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
58:42
December 9, 2018
How to bring up pornography concerns when dating - Vauna Davis - Illuminate Podcast Episode 25
Geoff Steurer and Vauna Davis discuss how couples can respectfully address the issue of pornography when dating. She also shares a free resource to help couples navigate this conversation to build more honesty and growth in their relationship. You can learn more about Reach 10 on the website at reach10.org Vauna Davis has been involved in the cause opposing pornography for many years. She is founder and director of Reach 10, a nonprofit that empowers young adults to speak, teach, and lead on the issue of pornography. She also is happy to be working with Protect Young Minds as the Outreach and Education Coordinator. She serves as chair for The Safeguard Alliance of the National Center on Sexual Exploitation, and is former director of Utah Coalition Against Pornography. She received an MA in Communications from BYU and lives with her husband, Michael, in Springville, Utah. They enjoy spending time with their grown-up children and grandkids. She loves yardwork - it gets her away from her desk! Reach 10 is a team of young adult speakers that inspire courage, compassion, and connection to overcome the shame, silence, and fear that keep people stuck in pornography. Our name is a call to action – we believe that one person can make a difference as they reach out to 10 people with a message of hope and connection. The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program to help couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
33:23
November 25, 2018
Helping Young Adults Change the Conversation about Pornography - Vauna Davis - Episode 24
In this episode I interview Vauna Davis, the founder and director of Reach 10, and organization that helps young people start healthy conversations about the impact of pornography on individuals and relationships. We discuss: * How to take pornography from being a punchline to a productive conversation. * What young people can do beyond recognizing that this is a problem for individuals and relationships. * How to create real solutions using “courage, compassion, and connection.” * How dealing with this issue builds stronger people and how not talking about this produces more self-criticism and shame. * What loved ones can do to offer immediate support to young adults who struggle with pornography. You can learn more about Reach 10 on the website at http://reach10.org Vauna Davis has been involved in the cause opposing pornography for many years. She is founder and director of Reach 10, a nonprofit that empowers young adults to speak, teach, and lead on the issue of pornography. She also is happy to be working with Protect Young Minds as the Outreach and Education Coordinator. She serves as chair for The Safeguard Alliance of the National Center on Sexual Exploitation, and is former director of Utah Coalition Against Pornography. She received an MA in Communications from BYU and lives with her husband, Michael, in Springville, Utah. They enjoy spending time with their grown-up children and grandkids. She loves yardwork - it gets her away from her desk! Reach 10 is a team of young adult speakers that inspire courage, compassion, and connection to overcome the shame, silence, and fear that keep people stuck in pornography. Our name is a call to action – we believe that one person can make a difference as they reach out to 10 people with a message of hope and connection. The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program to help couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
31:30
November 10, 2018
Finding freedom and peace when betrayed - Roxanne Kennedy (part 2) - Episode 23
I return with a second interview with Roxanne Kennedy, author of "Cutting Ties", where she talks about how women healing from betrayal trauma can learn to take charge of their own healing regardless of the outcome of their marriage. She shares the hopeful message that healing is possible, even though it's messy and difficult. She also share details of her specific recovery plan and how she worked her way toward peace and freedom. You can follow Roxanne and learn more about her book at www.cuttingties.com and www.facebook.com/RKennedyCuttingTies/ The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program to help couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
27:55
October 25, 2018
Betrayal trauma, divorce, and healing - Roxanne Kennedy Part 1 - Illuminate Podcast Episode 22
Many couples who work through recovery from sexual addiction, pornography addiction, and betrayal trauma end up staying together, but what happens to the betrayed women whose husbands choose not to continue working their recovery process? In this episode, Geoff Steurer interviews Roxanne Kennedy, author of the newly released book "Cutting Ties", where she shares her story of healing through the trials of sexual betrayal, fighting to save the marriage, divorce, and rebuilding her life. Not only does she share her personal story, but she also offers hope to all women that they can heal no matter what happens to their marriage. You can follow Roxanne and learn more about her book at https://www.facebook.com/RKennedyCuttingTies/ The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program to help couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
31:21
October 4, 2018
Following up with Brandon and Jaylynn on their long-term recovery - Illuminate Podcast episode 21
In this episode, Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT interviews Brandon and Jaylynn, the couple who were featured in Episodes 1-6. This is a follow-up visit to understand their recovery journey almost two years after the original interviews. In this interview, we talk about: - How change happens in addiction and trauma recovery - What boundaries and rules are still in place to keep them progressing - The reality that deep and lasting change is possible You can follow Jaylynn on Instagram @latterdaywarrior and contact Brandon at outofthedarkaddict@yahoo.com The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program to help couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
46:43
September 20, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Twenty - Teaching Children Media Literacy (Part 2)
Media is all about messages. Every post, every commercial, every shot, every movie is full of messages that try and convince us to think, feel, talk, dress, eat, and act a certain way. How in the world can we decipher these messages? And, how can we help our children see what’s going on around them? In the previous episode (episode 19), Dina Alexander from Educate & Empower Kids told us how we can begin to “read” the images and messages around us. It’s called media literacy and she says it’s a skill that we can teach ourselves and our children. In this podcast, Dina teaches us: - How the media is constantly telling us what we should wear, think, eat, etc. - How everything in the media is designed to profit off of us - we are being sold something with every message - That our children are being turned into professional marketers by the media culture they’re living in and now have more influence with more people than ever before. - How we can help our children be authentic when they’re posting on social media - We can use these media messages as an opportunity to connect with our kids Dina Alexander is the founder and president of Educate and Empower Kids, and the author of several books on helping parents talk to their children about their bodies, sexuality, pornography, media literacy, and smartphones. The book featured in this podcast episode, "Petra's Power to See", can be purchased here: educateempowerkids.org/products The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program to help couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
33:03
August 29, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Nineteen - Teaching Children Media Literacy (part 1)
We live in an image-based culture and even though we see hundreds of images everyday, most of us don't know how to "read" images the same way we know how to read words. In today's episode, Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT interviews Dina Alexander from Educate and Empower Kids on the topic of media literacy. She teaches us how we can become more literate in reading images and understanding the messages they're sending us. We also discuss: - How to give our children the power to see what they're being sold in today's multimedia world - How to help our children make decisions from a place of personal agency - How parents can break down what we’re seeing so parents and children aren’t overwhelmed. - What questions to ask when critiquing images, such as, "why was this made, who made it, who is their audience, what is the main message, what’s the hidden message, what’s included, and what’s left out?" Dina Alexander is the founder and president of Educate and Empower Kids, and the author of several books on helping parents talk to their children about their bodies, sexuality, pornography, media literacy, and smartphones. The book featured in this podcast episode, "Petra's Power to See", can be purchased here: https://educateempowerkids.org/products The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program to help couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
26:46
August 15, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Eighteen - Self Care in Recovery (part 2) - Amy Cluff, LCSW
In this episode, I continue my interview with Amy Cluff where we discuss self-care in recovery from pornography addiction and betrayal trauma. Specifically, we discuss: * How to set up a long term self-care plan to thrive * Learning how to move from unhealthy coping to healthy coping and how to move from crisis state to peaceful state. * How to keep self-care from feeling like a burden. * Specific examples of ways to include physical, emotional, sexual, relational, and mental area of self-care. Amy Cluff is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and has been serving Southern Utah in social work capacities since 1999. Amy received her Master of Social Work Degree from the University of Utah in 2004. She is a member of the National Association of Social Workers, Association for Play Therapy, and the Association of Mormon Counselors and Psychotherapists. Amy specializes in therapy for women, children, and families. She is licensed to provide assessment, diagnosis, and treatment for most mental health disorders. Her training is in mood disorders, anxiety, trauma, attachment and relationship therapy, attention and impulse control, blended family, co-parenting, and divorce issues. She also specializes in working with partners and family members of addicts. Amy is committed to providing excellent treatment for her clients and staying educated in her field. She is available in her community for presentations, workshops, and service opportunities.Amy has a private therapy practice in St. George, Utah. She and her husband are raising two wonderful children, and her family is her greatest joy. She enjoys the outdoors, reading, yoga, and exercise The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
34:58
August 4, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Seventeen - Self Care in Recovery (part 1) - Amy Cluff, LCSW
Self-care is a critical component of healthy recovery from betrayal trauma and addiction. In this episode, Amy Cluff defines self-care and teaches why it matters. She shares practical ways to begin practicing self-care. Amy Cluff is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and has been serving Southern Utah in social work capacities since 1999. Amy received her Master of Social Work Degree from the University of Utah in 2004. She is a member of the National Association of Social Workers, Association for Play Therapy, and the Association of Mormon Counselors and Psychotherapists. Amy specializes in therapy for women, children, and families. She is licensed to provide assessment, diagnosis, and treatment for most mental health disorders. Her training is in mood disorders, anxiety, trauma, attachment and relationship therapy, attention and impulse control, blended family, co-parenting, and divorce issues. She also specializes in working with partners and family members of addicts. Amy is committed to providing excellent treatment for her clients and staying educated in her field. She is available in her community for presentations, workshops, and service opportunities.Amy has a private therapy practice in St. George, Utah. She and her husband are raising two wonderful children, and her family is her greatest joy. She enjoys the outdoors, reading, yoga, and exercise The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
36:57
July 20, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Sixteen - Common Questions about Recovery - Dr. Adam Moore (Part 2)
Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and co-director of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, finishes his interview with Dr. Adam Moore on common questions about recovery from pornography and sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. In today's episode, we cover the following questions: * How does disclosing secrets help couples in recovery? * Is the wife responsible for her husband's pornography addiction? * If he wants to stop, why can't he just stop by using his willpower? Dr. Adam M. Moore is a licensed marriage and family therapist and co-owner of Sela Health, which operates mental health counseling offices in Lehi, Utah; Provo, Utah; Mapleton, Utah; and Las Vegas, Nevada. Sela Health employees have provided over 38,000 hours of counseling since the company's inception in 2013. In addition to managing his counseling practice, Dr. Moore hosts a mental health podcast called Pocket Therapist. He also manages My Recovery Portal, a website that has provided on-demand addiction recovery content to people all over the world. Dr. Moore regularly engages in public speaking events on the topic of pornography and sexual addiction recovery, and has presented workshops to over 12,000 people since 2013. Currently, Dr. Moore serves as president of the Utah Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. Here are some online resources from Dr. Adam Moore: * Guide to support LDS bishops working with pornography addiction and betrayal trauma utahvalleycounseling.box.com/v/bishops-guide * Pocket Therapist podcast -- a podcast about how to use words and language to create the life you want -- www.yourpockettherapist.com * My FREE content about pornography addiction recovery -- www.adammmoore.com/media * The counseling practice I manage - Utah Valley Counseling -- www.utahvalleycounseling.com * The counseling practice I manage (outside of Utah) Las Vegas Counseling -- www.lasvegascounseling.com * My Recovery Portal - my online education portal for free and paid content for pornography addiction recovery -- www.myrecoveryportal.com * Pornography addiction recovery workbook - www.myrecoveryportal.com/product/the-…l-behaviors/ The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
22:13
July 5, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Fifteen - Common Questions about Recovery - Dr. Adam Moore (Part 1)
Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and co-director of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, interviews Dr. Adam Moore on common questions about recovery from pornography and sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. In today's episode, we cover the following questions: * How can you know if the therapist you’re working with is qualified to treat pornography addiction? * Does pornography addiction progressively get more severe? * Do all women married to a pornography addict experience betrayal trauma? * Do couples need to work with multiple therapists to treat pornography addiction and betrayal trauma? * Is everyone who looks at pornography an addict? Dr. Adam M. Moore is a licensed marriage and family therapist and co-owner of Sela Health, which operates mental health counseling offices in Lehi, Utah; Provo, Utah; Mapleton, Utah; and Las Vegas, Nevada. Sela Health employees have provided over 38,000 hours of counseling since the company's inception in 2013. In addition to managing his counseling practice, Dr. Moore hosts a mental health podcast called Pocket Therapist. He also manages My Recovery Portal, a website that has provided on-demand addiction recovery content to people all over the world. Dr. Moore regularly engages in public speaking events on the topic of pornography and sexual addiction recovery, and has presented workshops to over 12,000 people since 2013. Currently, Dr. Moore serves as president of the Utah Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. Here are some online resources from Dr. Adam Moore: * Guide to support LDS bishops working with pornography addiction and betrayal trauma https://utahvalleycounseling.box.com/v/bishops-guide * Pocket Therapist podcast -- a podcast about how to use words and language to create the life you want -- www.yourpockettherapist.com * My FREE content about pornography addiction recovery -- www.adammmoore.com/media * The counseling practice I manage - Utah Valley Counseling -- www.utahvalleycounseling.com * The counseling practice I manage (outside of Utah) Las Vegas Counseling -- www.lasvegascounseling.com * My Recovery Portal - my online education portal for free and paid content for pornography addiction recovery -- www.myrecoveryportal.com * Pornography addiction recovery workbook - http://www.myrecoveryportal.com/product/the-recovery-workbook-for-sexual-addiction-compulsive-sexual-behaviors/ The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
32:06
June 22, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Fourteen - Fight the New Drug with Clay Olsen (Part 2)
Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT continues his interview with CEO and co-founder of Fight the New Drug, Clay Olsen. In this episode, we talk about: - How pornography struggles aren't just a "guy problem" and how girls can struggle just as much - The most helpful ways parents can respond to their teen who is struggling with pornography - How Church leaders can respond best to teens who struggle - Resources that are available to help parents and teens confront pornography You can learn more about Fight the New Drug at: www.fightthenewdrug.org The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
23:36
June 2, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Thirteen - Fight the New Drug with Clay Olsen (part 1)
Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT interviews CEO and co-founder of Fight the New Drug, Clay Olsen. In this episode, we talk about the new digital landscape facing our teens and young adults and how parents can begin having courageous and honest conversations with our young people about the dangers they face. You can learn more about Fight the New Drug at: http://www.fightthenewdrug.org The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
19:31
May 22, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Twelve - Kristen Jenson - Protecting Young Minds (Part 2)
This is part 2 of my interview with Kristen Jenson, founder of Protect Young Minds, and the author of the children's book, "Good Pictures, Bad Pictures." In this episode, we continue our discussion about how to protect children from the harms of pornography and give parents action steps they can begin taking immediately to help their children. Here is more information about Kristen's organization and resources: * The Quickstart Guide for Proactive Parents protectyoungminds.org/prepare/ * The SMART Plan for Parents (help for parents of kids who have viewed porn) protectyoungminds.org/heal/ * Share & Speak Up protectyoungminds.org/share/ * Art vs Porn: How to Explain the Difference to a Child protectyoungminds.org/2016/09/08/por…explain-child/ * Feelings 101: A Simple Exercise to Build Emotional Wellness in Kids protectyoungminds.org/2017/10/12/exe…wellness-kids/ * Block Porn Interest: A Proactive Parenting Plan protectyoungminds.org/2016/03/17/blo…porn-interest/ Also, listeners can get a free CAN DO Plan poster by texting CANDOPLAN to 44222. They can find out more about her books here. protectyoungminds.org/books/ The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
34:58
May 8, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Eleven - Protecting Young Minds - Kristen Jenson
Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT interviews author, speaker, and founder of Protect Young Minds, Kristen A. Jenson. In this episode, Kristen shares how parents need to begin planning how they will talk with their young children about the dangers found online and how they can prepare their children to respond. Kristen is the author of the children's books, "Good Pictures, Bad Pictures" and "Good Pictures, Bad Pictures, Jr". Here is more information about Kristen's organization and resources: * The Quickstart Guide for Proactive Parents https://protectyoungminds.org/prepare/ * The SMART Plan for Parents (help for parents of kids who have viewed porn) https://protectyoungminds.org/heal/ * Share & Speak Up https://protectyoungminds.org/share/ * Art vs Porn: How to Explain the Difference to a Child https://protectyoungminds.org/2016/09/08/porn-vs-art-explain-child/ * Feelings 101: A Simple Exercise to Build Emotional Wellness in Kids https://protectyoungminds.org/2017/10/12/exercise-build-emotional-wellness-kids/ * Block Porn Interest: A Proactive Parenting Plan https://protectyoungminds.org/2016/03/17/block-porn-interest/ Also, listeners can get a free CAN DO Plan poster by texting CANDOPLAN to 44222. They can find out more about her books here. https://protectyoungminds.org/books/ The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
30:54
April 26, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Ten - More About Disclosure - Jeff Ford
Geoff Steurer continues his interview with Jeff Ford, licensed marriage and family therapist and co-director of LifeStar of St. George, UT, about the sensitive topic of disclosure. In this episode, they discuss the following points: * The differences between disclosing to a bishop versus a spouse * How do decide who to tell in the disclosure process * What a woman should do if her husband doesn’t want to open up to others about this * Why the advice, “stop bringing up the past” isn’t helpful in the disclosure process * How “letting the past go” is a process, not an event * What type of information should be shared with a betrayed wife in a disclosure? * Why the betrayed wife gets the final say about what gets disclosed Jeff Ford and Geoff Steurer are the co-authors of the Disclosure workbook series published by the LifeStar Network and have professionally guided hundreds of therapeutic disclosures. For more questions on the disclosure process or to purchase the disclosure workbooks, send an email to: info@lifestarstgeorge.com
34:19
April 15, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Nine - Why a full disclosure matters - Jeff Ford
Geoff Steurer interviews Jeff Ford, licensed marriage and family therapist and co-director of LifeStar of St. George, UT, about the sensitive topic of disclosure. In this episode, they discuss the following points: * What is a therapeutic disclosure and why is it important for healing? * How should disclosure be approached? * Who needs to know the information? * How does a disclosure facilitate healing in addiction recovery and marriage recovery? Jeff Ford and Geoff Steurer are the co-authors of the Disclosure workbook series published by the LifeStar Network and have professionally guided hundreds of therapeutic disclosures. For more questions on the disclosure process or to purchase the disclosure workbooks, send an email to: info@lifestarstgeorge.com
29:50
March 29, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Eight - Patterns of Healing with Michelle Linford (part 2)
In this episode, Geoff Steurer presents his second half of his interview Michelle Linford, the founder and administrator for LDS Hope and Healing. In this episode, we discuss: * How breaking out of isolation can help you feel more hope * The difference between a healing community and a support group * Why joining a healing community is essential for your recovery * Why forgiveness and trust aren’t the same thing * Why rebuilding trust requires time * The three most important indicators that someone is in recovery * Why the betrayed partner and the recovering addict need their own recovery processes * How the focus of recovery needs to be on restoring each person to spiritual health before any relationships can be healed More on Michelle's background: Michelle's online volunteer work took an unexpected turn in late 2011 when search engine data showed the desperate need many LDS women had for help and support because of the sexual addiction/compulsion of a loved one. In response to that need, in January 2012, Michelle created HopeandHealingLDS.com (a blog and private forum) with the belief that if women knew they weren't alone, had others with whom they could connect, and had resources and information available to them, real healing could begin. Her motto was: "Let's use the tool that has brought so much pain to bring hope and healing to people!" In addition, inspired by her research about addiction recovery and the hope-filled stories of recovery from addicts and loved ones alike, Michelle chose to do 12-step work in her own life to find healing from shame, perfectionism, and fear-based living. She has been participating regularly in the Church’s 12-step program for six years, and is currently a facilitator in ARP. Michelle has a bachelor's degree in Psychology and an MBA, with an emphasis in organizational behavior and change. She is the Executive Director of EPIK Deliberate Digital, and is a member of the prevention task force (the Safeguard Alliance) for the National Center on Sexual Exploitation. Michelle and her husband, Matt, are the grateful parents of three, beginning the tender stage of launching their children into the world. In addition to being an ARP facilitator, Michelle also is grateful to serve as a facilitator in the Church's Self-Reliance Services program. Additional Resources from Michelle www.hopeandhealinglds.com/2017/02/14/o…e-resources/ Slides link (this was a presentation last February on dating in a pornified world at a BYU Women's Services conference last year): wsr.byu.edu/sites/default/files…wer%20-%20Final.pdf This is a podcast with LDS Perspectives www.ldsperspectives.com/tag/michelle-linford/ ldsmag.com/author/michelle-linford/ realintent.org/out-of-the-corner/ realintent.org/healing/ This is a compilation of thoughts and resources that assimilate learning from her role at EPIK, at HopeAndHealing (including all that research), and in her own personal experience in 12-step as a participant, sponsor, and facilitator. docs.google.com/document/d/1dn9ny…/edit?usp=sharing The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction.
32:53
March 15, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Seven - Patterns of Healing with Michelle Linford (part 1)
In this episode, Geoff Steurer interviews Michelle Linford, the founder and administrator for LDS Hope and Healing. She talks about patterns of healing she's seen as she's supported and connected with women in recovery from betrayal trauma. She wanted to access the same healing they had in their lives, so she began doing her own 12-step work. In this episode, she share lessons she's learned in both her own personal journey and witnessing the journey of hundreds of others in recovery. More on Michelle's background: Michelle's online volunteer work took an unexpected turn in late 2011 when search engine data showed the desperate need many LDS women had for help and support because of the sexual addiction/compulsion of a loved one. In response to that need, in January 2012, Michelle created HopeandHealingLDS.com (a blog and private forum) with the belief that if women knew they weren't alone, had others with whom they could connect, and had resources and information available to them, real healing could begin. Her motto was: "Let's use the tool that has brought so much pain to bring hope and healing to people!" In addition, inspired by her research about addiction recovery and the hope-filled stories of recovery from addicts and loved ones alike, Michelle chose to do 12-step work in her own life to find healing from shame, perfectionism, and fear-based living. She has been participating regularly in the Church’s 12-step program for six years, and is currently a facilitator in ARP. Michelle has a bachelor's degree in Psychology and an MBA, with an emphasis in organizational behavior and change. She is the Executive Director of EPIK Deliberate Digital, and is a member of the prevention task force (the Safeguard Alliance) for the National Center on Sexual Exploitation. Michelle and her husband, Matt, are the grateful parents of three, beginning the tender stage of launching their children into the world. In addition to being an ARP facilitator, Michelle also is grateful to serve as a facilitator in the Church's Self-Reliance Services program. Additional Resources from Michelle https://www.hopeandhealinglds.com/2017/02/14/our-favorite-resources/ Slides link (this was a presentation last February on dating in a pornified world at a BYU Women's Services conference last year): https://wsr.byu.edu/sites/default/files/u3/Patterns%2C%20Principles%2C%20and%20Power%20-%20Final.pdf This is a podcast with LDS Perspectives http://www.ldsperspectives.com/tag/michelle-linford/ https://ldsmag.com/author/michelle-linford/ http://realintent.org/out-of-the-corner/ http://realintent.org/healing/ This is a compilation of thoughts and resources that assimilate learning from her role at EPIK, at HopeAndHealing (including all that research), and in her own personal experience in 12-step as a participant, sponsor, and facilitator. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dn9nybwJn1wO8b8fG2Oz6T5HqLD3PnqyxkMj9oOQLJI/edit?usp=sharing The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction.
31:54
February 28, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Six - Jaylynn's story (part 2)
In this episode, Geoff Steurer shares the second part of his interview with Jaylynn, a woman who was betrayed by her husband's secretive pornography use. She talks about the healing process she's been involved with for the past few years. Program highlights include: - What her life is like now versus in the beginning of her journey - How the nature of her prayers has changed through this process of healing. - She talks about why she began helping other women and wanted to talk openly about this problem. - She shares why she believes we need to be more open about our personal struggles and share our stories with others - She identifies two things that have made the biggest difference in her marriage - Why “surrendering” is more of an active process than passively giving up. - She identifies the initial boundaries she set up in the beginning of her recovery process and how she learned to set healthy boundaries. - She shares advice she gives bishops who are working with betrayed women. - How women can get started in their recoveries, including the one thing a betrayed woman can do now to start the process of recovery Links from this episode: LDS 12-Step Program https://addictionrecovery.lds.org/?lang=eng https://salifeline.org/ Setting boundaries in recovery: https://utahcoalition.org/project/how-do-i-set-boundaries-in-recovery/ The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction.
37:24
February 15, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Five - Jaylynn's story (part 1)
In this episode, Geoff Steurer interviews Jaylynn, a woman who was betrayed by her husband's secretive pornography use. She talks about the healing process she's been involved with for the past few years. Program highlights include: - This process has taught her that people can change - Healing can’t be rushed. Forgiveness and trust will come with time - Getting triggered by past betrayals is her “new normal” and how she copes with this new reality - It’s normal and healthy to feel these strong emotions as part of the healing process - Why forgiving and forgetting isn’t a helpful approach for women who have been betrayed. - Why it’s important to slow down and heal thoroughly instead of trying to get better quickly - The nature of betrayal and how it overwhelmed her ability to cope with life - How to find peace regardless of what your addicted spouse chooses - Why making your addicted husband your focus creates more chaos. The Illuminate Podcast is hosted by Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and founder of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a treatment program for couples healing from the impact of pornography and sexual addiction.
27:38
January 31, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Four - Brandon's story (part 2)
In today’s Illuminate podcast, Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT and co-director of LifeStar of St. George, Utah continues his interview with Brandon Bryson who shares how he finally broke out of the hopeless cycle he’d been stuck in since he was a teenager. He had spent years trying to do things halfway and completely alone until he finally realized he was stuck in the same cycle. He had to make some dramatic changes to his environment and to his routines and reach out in completely honesty, but he says that’s made all the difference. Brandon also talks about the devastation he caused in his marriage and how he’s working to rebuild a strong bridge between himself and his wife. In this episode, Brandon shares: * Why he finally decided to come out of hiding and get help. * How he cycled in and out of abstaining, relapsing, hiding, and abstaining and finally confessing and surrendering his way of doing things and opened up to a more complete healing process. * Why getting “caught” versus “confessing on your own” makes recovery and rebuilding trust so much harder. * Why he had to completely overhaul his environment and his lifestyle so he could break the addiction cycle. * What it means to really change your heart. * How he began to help his wife heal after he had broken her heart for a third time.
28:48
January 18, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Three - Brandon's story (part 1)
Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT interviews Brandon, a man recovering from a decades long pornography addiction. In this episode: * Brandon share his most important advice to men struggling * He talks about the common excuses/reasons why men try and handle this on their own without getting help. * The role of agency in addiction - if we have the power to choose to stop, why can’t people just stop? * He talks about how early exposure and denial kept him from being healthy and honest about this as he grew into adulthood. * The importance about talking about this as parents and couples. * Brandon reveals his thought process for living a double life - pretending to be a worthy priesthood holder while secretly viewing pornography * Why forming a “band of brothers” in recovery is essential. Why telling one person about your struggle isn’t going to be enough to ensure long-term success. * Why you need a place outside of your marriage to talk about your struggles. The Illuminate podcast is brought to you by LifeStar of St. George, Utah, a program that helps couples heal their betrayed marriages. Learn more at www.lifestarstgeorge.com
28:32
January 1, 2018
Illuminate Podcast - Episode Two - Brandon and Jaylynn tell their story (part 2)
Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT, of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, interviews an LDS couple who are in recovery from pornography addiction and betrayal trauma.
23:08
November 30, 2017
Illuminate Podcast - Episode One - Brandon and Jaylynn tell their story (part 1)
Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT, owner of LifeStar of St. George, Utah, interviews an LDS couple who are in recovery from pornography addiction and betrayal trauma.
25:08
September 7, 2017
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