Skip to main content
Infertility Crossroads

Infertility Crossroads

By Meta Getman

Infertility Crossroads is a podcast all about the decision points you make as you try to become a parent. Whether you are just starting out on your TTC journey, have been through IUIs, IVF cycles, and are exploring alternative paths to becoming a parent like donor conception (donor egg, donor sperm, donor embryo, double donor), adoption or living child free this podcast will help you answer the question of "what's next" in a way that allows you to feel good about your decisions. Your host, Meta Getman, is a donor conception coach and mom to twin girls conceived via donor egg.
Where to listen
Amazon Music Logo

Amazon Music

Apple Podcasts Logo

Apple Podcasts

Spotify Logo

Spotify

Stitcher Logo

Stitcher

Currently playing episode

09. Six Tips for Building Better Connection with Your Partner During Infertility

Infertility Crossroads

1x
12. Infertility from a Male's Perspective: Michael's Insights on Donor Conception (Part 2)
12. Infertility from a Male's Perspective: Michael's Insights on Donor Conception (Part 2)
This episode is part 2 of a two part series I recorded with my husband Michael.  If you haven't listened to part 1 yet, go back and listen to episode 11 first.  In today's episode, Michael and I pivot our conversation to our perspectives on choosing our donor, working through our grief around donor conception, the way we communicate in decision making, Michael's thoughts on us using anonymous donor, and Michael's tips for other men going through this process.   Connect with me on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help. Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast
29:48
November 28, 2022
11. Infertility from a Male Perspective: Michael's Insights on Our Story (Part 1)
11. Infertility from a Male Perspective: Michael's Insights on Our Story (Part 1)
Infertility from the male perspective is not talked about nearly as much as it should be.  In part 1 of a 2 part series with my husband, Michael Getman, we talk about his perspective of our path to becoming parents.  Michael talks about how he felt when we learned he had a low sperm count that would lead us to IUI, his thoughts on the infertility crossroad of going to IVF to how we navigated made decisions along the way.     We even talk about our WTF appointment where we learned we were going to have to use donor eggs to build our family and a shocking realization comes out about his thought process vs. mine.   This is an episode not to be missed!  Michael Getman is an incredible partner and husband (mine!) and the genetic father to our donor egg conceived twin girls. He is also a scientist who spends his days working in the healthcare industry.  Michael has shared his story and perspective with my private clients as well as at multiple Resolve Midwest Family Building Summits.  Connect with me on Instagram Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help. Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast
32:48
November 21, 2022
10. Giving Thanks When You Feel Like You Have Nothing to be Thankful For
10. Giving Thanks When You Feel Like You Have Nothing to be Thankful For
Giving thanks when it feels like you have nothing to be thankful for can be really hard.   During the holidays, when we are "supposed to be thankful" can be especially challenging.  For me, as a kid, the holidays were magical.  As I got older, they got harder and harder.  And during infertility they were the absolute worst.  The holidays marked another year of trying.  Another year with no baby.  Another year of watching others get their families and me still without mine.  On today's episode I'm sharing with you the biggest thing I've learned about how to be thankful and give thanks when it feels like there is nothing to be thankful for.  I'll give you a hint...it's not that hard and you can start doing it today.  Resources from today's episode: Giving Thanks Can Make You Happier, Harvard Health and Wellbeing  Gratitude and the Brain: What is Happening, Brain Balance Centers Connect with me on Instagram Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast
14:49
November 14, 2022
09. Six Tips for Building Better Connection with Your Partner During Infertility
09. Six Tips for Building Better Connection with Your Partner During Infertility
Infertility can be incredibly challenging on your relationships - especially your relationship with your partner.  Today I'm sharing six tips for building better connection with your partner during infertility.  Infertility is typically one of the first really hard things couples go through.  Up until now, it's probably been really good! And now, not only are you struggling to build a family but both of you are experiencing the challenges at the same time.  You and your partner are going through your own struggles.  You are each approaching it from different perspectives and bringing in your different histories to the conversation. It can be hard to support one another when you are both struggling but it's not impossible.  In fact, it is VERY possible - you just need to be intentional about how you work together as a team.  Today's episode gives you those tools you need to be intentional.  To be a team.  And to grow your relationship closer in the midst of a challenging time.  Connect with me on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide 
13:53
November 07, 2022
08. Why Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month Feels Hard
08. Why Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month Feels Hard
Why has pregnancy and infant loss awareness month felt hard for me? Because I don't fit into what I perceived a loss had to be. I didn't have a miscarriage.  I didn't have an infant loss.  And I feel incredibly grateful that is the case.  But I did have loss along the way.  I had 7 unsuccessful cycles of treatment for infertility.  I had 3 IVF cycles that all resulted in embryos being transferred and no baby.  I felt and grieved what could have been for those embryos but didn't allow myself the freedom to truly grieve it as a loss.  In the episode today I share my story and talk about how all of our losses whether they fit into what society tells us is loss or not can still impact us deeply.  And I honor all the losses that come along with this journey to becoming a parent.  Episode Resources:  https://starlegacyfoundation.org/awareness-month/ https://pregnancyafterlosssupport.org/get-involved/pail-awareness-month/ Connect with me on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide. 
11:41
October 31, 2022
07. We Used an Anonymous Donor. I'd Do It Differently If I Could.
07. We Used an Anonymous Donor. I'd Do It Differently If I Could.
We used an anonymous donor.  I'd do it differently if I could. This topic is a very personal one for me.  Because the choice we made to use an anonymous egg donor is one that I felt guilty about for a long time.  It's something that impacts my children in ways I never thought about.   But I also think it is incredibly important to talk about it.  Talk about what I've learned since that decision was made.  Be open to having these hard conversations and be open to learning, growing, and exploring how we can continue to do better.  If you used anonymous donor or if you are thinking about using anonymous donor, this episode is for you.   During the episode I talk about my own decision making process, how I feel about it now, what I've learned, how we can support our kids going forward, plus some good resources and organizations to listen to and learn from Donor Conceived People.    Resources discussed during the episode: Donor Conceived Council  and Donor Conceived Council on Instagram Donor Conceived Support  and Donor Conceived Support on Instagram Made to Wonder: Race to End Anonymous Donation 2022 - you can still donate to Donor Conceived Council and Donor Conceived Support through this link.
14:24
October 24, 2022
06. Melissa's Story: Navigating Infertility Through the Ups and Downs of Life
06. Melissa's Story: Navigating Infertility Through the Ups and Downs of Life
One of the hardest things for me when I was on my journey to becoming a parent was finding people who were in the same situation as I was.  I wanted so deeply to connect with others who understood what I was going through. I found some infertility friends but when we decided to move onto donor eggs, finding people who understood the complexities of donor was even harder. This episode features Melissa Nath, an orthopedic nurse coordinator, wife and dog mom, who started trying to conceive in her 40's.  I met Melissa when she joined my Donor Downlow program and she is incredible!  Even though the the path to becoming a parent hasn't gone the way she thought it would, she has continued to find hope and resources to help her along the way.  From navigating male factor infertility, the loss of her mother, and losing her own genetics, Melissa is resilient, strong, brave, passionate about helping others in the midst of her pain, and has a story I hope you can relate to. Connect with Melissa on Instagram or Facebook.  Connect with me on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide 
47:48
October 17, 2022
05. Five Ways to Come to Terms Using A Donor
05. Five Ways to Come to Terms Using A Donor
Coming to terms with using a donor to build your family.  It's a BIG infertility crossroad and one that I think is really important to talk about.  Maybe you are just hearing about using a donor as an option.  Maybe you have known deep down that donor was going to be your path.   Maybe you even know that donor is your path because of a cancer diagnosis or other reason why you or your partner doesn't have the genetics to conceive.   Regardless of why you are staring down the tunnel of donor conception, it can be scary.  It can be hard.  It can be incredibly lonely. In today's episode I share my top 5 tips for coming to terms with using a donor so you can move forward in building your family in whatever way you decide.  Connect with me on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast
12:30
October 14, 2022
04. I Have Low AMH. Should I Skip to Donor Eggs?
04. I Have Low AMH. Should I Skip to Donor Eggs?
Today I wanted to talk about a topic that is near and dear to my own story - low AMH and donor eggs.  AMH, or anti-mullerian hormone is a hormone that is made in the reproductive tissues and can give you pieces of information about the puzzle that is your infertility story.   I didn't know anything about AMH until I was well into my fertility journey.  On today's episode I talk about what is AMH, why it's important to know, what it means (and doesn't mean) and how it relates to possibly having to use donor eggs to build your family.  Connect with me on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast Resources mentioned in the episode:  https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diagnostics/22681-anti-mullerian-hormone-test https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3852815/
06:29
October 13, 2022
03. Keeping Your Fertility Journey Private without Pushing Away Friends and Family
03. Keeping Your Fertility Journey Private without Pushing Away Friends and Family
I hear it all the time...I don't want to push away my friends and family but I don't want to share all the details of our infertility journey.  How do I keep things private but not push people away?  Infertility can be incredibly isolating.  It can be hard, especially if we are wanting to keep things private and not share with everyone how much we are struggling to have a baby.  You might feel like you are pulling away from friends and family.  Being around them or in big groups of people can be really challenging because you are on the edge emotionally and not sure how you will react.  You want to be honest but you don't want to tell them everything.   I felt this exact same way.  I was emotionally fragile yet I value my relationships with the people around me and I didn't want to push them away.   On today's episode I share with you my top tips for being able to keep details about your fertility journey private while still maintaining your friendships and being able to attend family events.   Connect with me on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast
12:37
October 12, 2022
02. Five Things I'd Do Differently On My Infertility Journey
02. Five Things I'd Do Differently On My Infertility Journey
On this episode of Infertility Crossroads, I'm sharing with you five things I'd do differently if I had to start my fertility journey all over again.   Do you ever wish you had the opportunity to look back and change what you did?  It could be anything in life - maybe you'd study harder at school.  Maybe it would be taking up the flute instead of the clarinet (that is one of mine!).  Hindsight is 20/20.  We don't know what we don't know.  And the only way to learn what we don't know is to listen to those who have gone before us.   Looking back on my path to becoming a parent via infertility and ultimately using a donor, I wanted to share the four big things I've learned and what I'd do differently.  These four things will apply to anyone - whether you are just getting started, are in the thick of it, or are well on your way to becoming a parent.  My hope is that you can learn from my mistakes, make some different decisions to make this process just a bit easier and be reminded that you are not alone.  Connect with me on Instagram  Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast
17:23
October 11, 2022
01. My Story - The Road from Infertile to Donor Egg Mama
01. My Story - The Road from Infertile to Donor Egg Mama
In today's episode I'm kicking off this podcast sharing with you my story of being infertile and told donor eggs were my only option at the age of 31.   I didn't believe I had infertility.  Even though we were trying to conceive, had formal diagnosis of low sperm count, low sperm motility, low AMH and diminished ovarian reserve and were seeing a reproductive endocrinologist.  I just couldn't wrap my head around it.  Until the bomb of using a donor to conceive was dropped.  Not only did my whole world turn upside down but I finally came to the conclusion that I was infertile and I needed help.  Come along with me as I talk through how I came to terms with using a donor, what it's like now, and why I am using my experience to help others along the way.  Connect with me on Instagram Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast
15:07
October 10, 2022
0. Infertility Crossroads is Here!
0. Infertility Crossroads is Here!
Perhaps like me, you thought having a baby would be easy...yet here you are every day, week and month having to make big, scary, and radical decisions about what your future might look like.  I call it the Infertility Crossroads.   Whether you are just getting started on your fertility journey, have been trying for years, or are headed down an alternative path you are welcome here. Join me each week where I will walk along side you through all the infertility crossroads. Connect with me on Instagram Did you just learn that donor conception might be your path to parenthood? Or maybe you think it might be but are not sure yet? Or, maybe you already know but need some more help.  Get my free PDF download, The Donor Decision Guide www.metagetman.com/podcast
01:57
September 21, 2022