Intimate Interactions

Mahima is back to talk about daily practices and consistency. Many of us say we want to be disciplined, but she uses the word “blissiplined” in that discipline need not be an onerous task or strife. She’ll discuss the importance of a community and the culture they embody and model for you. We’ll touch on the importance of play in making daily practices compelling. Finally, content warning for the word “tribe” to mean a small community of non indigneous people forming close relationships.

Resources

Simon Sinec - Start with Why

It won't change unless you do

Done w feeling busy with this story

Atomic habits

The obstacle is the way

Grit by Duckworth

Keep Sharp by Sanjay Gupta

Mahima is back, the woman who grew up in apartheid Zimbabwe and now introduces herself as Europe’s number one self mastry expert. Today we’ll talk about her journey through love and intimacy from 26 where she meets a new man precipitating a spiritual awakening. We talk about dancing with shadow energy for your whole life and giving much less of a fuck since turning 21. Content warnings for body image and weight loss. Don’t worry, we’ll end on a body positive note and giving far less of a fuck.

We’re back with At Least Twice Have I Ever with Melody Anne from Erotic Education with Melody Anne, and Ms. Sara Blaze, a woman of many identities from mom to conference organizer to dominatrix.

Twice Have I Ever is a party game where we try to pick something we’ve done at least twice that the others have not done.

Today, we’ll talk about being choked out during sex, recording porn, having group sex, and lots more!

I’m excited to introduce my guest today, Mahima. She grew up in apartheid zimbabwe, married a swiss man at 21, divorced at 22, and is focused on cultivating peace, connection to self, to soul, and to sexual expression. Content warning for abuse, racism, body image, weight loss, self loathing, and apartheid. If I had to sum Mahima up in two words, it would be “love yourself.” Let’s go to the session.

Robin Beatch, the Sex Positive, Lifestyle Inclusive Talk Radio host from SPLIT Radio will join us today. You can follow Robin @sexwithrobin on instagram. Robin is a queer, non monogamous sex educator, coach, consultant, former stripper, former nurse, pro domme, and parent of two. Juniper, my only ever one night stand, is also back to add her positive, fun self to the mix.

Never Have I Ever is a party game where we try to find things we haven’t done that the others have done.

Today we’ll be talking about fisting someone, having sex with someone twice your age, and having sex in a bathroom.

Susannah Rose is with us today to chat about intimacy. An interesting twist today is that she’s completed combat tours in Afghanistan and I convinced her to talk a bit about the stresses she experienced while serving and the way intimacy functions in military hierarchy both between officers and among ranks. Content warnings: the 2012 Bastion Leatherneck attack comes up as well as some discussion of misogyny. It’s a special session today with Susannah Rose. Enjoy!

We’re back with Would You Rather. Our panel today is Melody Anne from Erotic Education with Melody Anne, and Ms. Sara Blaze, a woman of many identities from mom to conference organizer to dominatrix.

Would You Rather is a party game where we ask the other players to choose between two highly desirable or two highly undesirable outcomes or sometimes just between two really different outcomes to get to know each other better.

Today, we’ll ask if we’d rather face a robot or zombie apocalypse, eat a beloved pet or get eaten by said pet, and lots more! Enjoy!

We’re back with Never Have I Ever with Melody Anne from Erotic Education with Melody Anne, and Ms. Sara Blaze, a woman of many identities from mom to conference organizer to dominatrix.

Never Have I Ever is a party game where we try to find things we haven’t done that the others have done.

Today, we’ll ask about hook ups, sex while wearing a mask, and much more!

Alexandra Harbushka is back! After creating the Life with Herpes community to help anyone from suffering the way she did for any longer than absolutely necessary, she went on to create herpes wellness products and to offer 1-on-1 coaching for folks newly positive with herpes. Here we talk about meaningful steps for destigmatizing herpes infection such as how to prevent outbreaks. For more, check out Alexandra’s site, lifewithherpes.com.

Again, as a side note, there are always medical exceptions where any infection can be particularly severe or painful. While these are the exception and not the rule, it’s important we don’t erase the real suffering that some herpes sufferers experience even if they are not the norm. There are also treatments now like valcyclovir for those with frequent outbreaks to reduce outbreaks, pain, and transmission. Now let’s get into the content with Alexandra Harbushka here on Intimate Interactions.

What is self resourcing? Who has an easier time with compersion? Does your community moralize compersion or shame jealousy? Is it healthy to have banned emotions that you can’t talk about in your relationship?

You probably know most of these answers, but what about strategies? Dr. Joli Hamilton suggests practising compersion and managing jealousy on smaller, easier situations and then working up to harder ones. I’m always happy to have Dr. Hamilton on the show. I love her content and can’t wait to share more of it with you here on Intimate Interactions.

Robin Beatch, the Sex Positive, Lifestyle Inclusive Talk Radio host from SPLIT Radio will join us today. You can follow Robin @sexwithrobin on instagram. Robin is a queer, non monogamous sex educator, coach, consultant, former stripper, former nurse, pro domme, and parent of two. Juniper, my only ever one night stand, is also back to add her positive, fun self to the mix.

Twice Have I Ever is a party game where we try to pick something we’ve done at least twice that the others have not done.

Today we’ll be boasting about how we’ve had someone try to explain how an insertable got into their body, flashed someone consensually, been a naked human platter to serve food, and lots more here on Intimate Interactions.

We’re back with Never Have I Ever with a new panel: Melody Anne from Erotic Education with Melody Anne, and Ms. Sara Blaze, a woman of many identities from mom to conference organizer to dominatrix.

Never Have I Ever is a party game where we try to find things we haven’t done that the others have done.

Today, we’ll ask about flashing strangers, masturbating in crowded spaces, and lots of other prompts.

Alexandra Harbushka tested positive for genital herpes, leading her to create a community of like-minded people learning how to manage the condition and thriving together online. I believe stigma, disconnection, and loneliness are possibly the most devastating parts of many STIs for many people in the industrialised world where treatments are readily available and they can afford them. As a side note, there are always medical exceptions where any infection can be particularly severe or painful. While these are the exception and not the rule, it’s important we don’t erase the real suffering that some herpes sufferers experience even though they’re not common. There are also treatments now like valcyclovir for those with frequent outbreaks to reduce outbreaks, pain, and risk of transmission.

Today medical doctor Alexandra Stockwell talks about compromise and how it impacts intimacy and passion. Over her lengthy marriage and raising four children, she’s learned a lot about intimacy. Today we’re going to talk about what compromises do and why sometimes compromises aren’t the best solution. Please see the show notes for a link to The Assertiveness Workbook by Dr. Randy J. Paterson. You can also see

http:/alexandrastockwell.com/desires (for courses) or podcast (for podcast)

Enjoy!

Robin Beatch, the Sex Positive, Lifestyle Inclusive Talk Radio host from SPLIT Radio will join us today. You can follow Robin @sexwithrobin on instagram. Robin is a queer, non monogamous sex educator, coach, consultant, former stripper, former nurse, pro domme, and parent of two. Juniper, my only ever one night stand, is also back to add her positive, fun self to the mix.

Never Have I Ever is a party game where we try to find things we haven’t done that the others have done.

Today we talk about flirting with someone for a free drink, keeping someone you’ve slept with a secret, and lots more!

If you have ever had jealousy terrorize you or your relationship, you share a common pain with many individuals. Jealousy informs us. It teaches us things about ourselves and the situation - and possibly not the lessons you’ve been taking from it. If you could go back in time though, what would you change and what would be different for you as the person you are today?

Content warning for the word flogger that comes up in the context of kink.

Now, join me as I explore jealousy, intimacy, compersion, and lots more with Dr. Joli Hamilton. You can check out her TedX talk or visit her website at jolihamilton.com Now let’s hear from Dr. Hamilton herself on Intimate Interactions.

We’re launching into party games! Hooray! That means every few weeks for a while we’re going to be recording more of a fun episode where we play games like Never Have I Ever, Would You Rather, and Twice Have I Ever. I’ll explain the rules and let you know who the panel is on each show.

Robin Beatch, the Sex Positive, Lifestyle Inclusive Talk Radio host from SPLIT Radio will join us today. You can follow Robin @sexwithrobin on instagram. Robin is a queer, non monogamous sex educator, coach, consultant, former stripper, former nurse, pro domme, and parent of two. Juniper, my only ever one night stand, is also back to add her positive, fun self to the mix.

Never Have I Ever is a party game where we try to find things we haven’t done that the others have done.

Today we talk about broken bones, TPing someone’s house, and lots more.

Today medical doctor Alexandra Stockwell talks about compromise and how it impacts intimacy and passion. Over her lengthy marriage and raising four children, she’s learned a lot about intimacy. Today we’re going to talk about what compromises do and why sometimes compromises aren’t the best solution. Please see the show notes for a link to The Assertiveness Workbook by Dr. Randy J. Paterson. You can also see

http:/alexandrastockwell.com/desires (for courses) or podcast (for podcast)

Enjoy!

Alexandra Harbushka created Life with Herpes after she tested positive for a genital herpes infection. Since her harrowing story began, involving feelings of shame, loss, grief, rejection, and deep disconnection, she’s made tremendous progress. Following a lot of research and self work, she now boasts a community of people who are transitioning from surviving to thriving while infected with genital herpes. As a side note, there are always medical exceptions where any infection can be particularly severe or painful. While these are the exception and not the rule, it’s important we don’t erase the pain that some herpes sufferers experience even if they are less common. There are also treatments now like valcyclovir for those with frequent outbreaks to reduce outbreaks, pain, and transmission.

Now, get ready for a frank conversation where we work to destigmatize the infection and talk about the hard journey Alexandra went on later creating toolkits, wellness products, and coaching services. Let’s go to Alexandra here on Intimate Interactions.

Today, Juniper and I do something terrifying. We choose to, without pre-discussing, record an episode on our one night stand and what was going on for us. She mentioned she was nervous about having the discussion and wanted to save it for our last recorded session which definitely made my heart beat faster in an “oh god, I really hope this isn’t a call-out” kind of way. We both went into it blind, and here’s what we recorded, on Intimate Interactions.

Sex is something we do for many, many reasons from procreation to recreation, from fun to serious, from pity to insecurity, from anger to hurt, from jealousy to love. Sex is just a thing we as humans do with ourselves and with each other. Today, we talk with Robin Beatch about sex as the validating feeling of being chosen. As a former dominatrix, she approaches the talk from a place of experience. Let’s get to the session here on Intimate Interactions.

Juniper, the only woman I’ve had a one night stand with, opens up about her chronic illness Rickettsia, a bacterial infection caused by tick bites that can lead to chronic fatigue and other physiological problems. Content warning for chronic illnesses. We talk about the deep depression and complete loss of hope that can come in certain moments. Juniper describes this experience for her as a “spiritual death” that eventually got easier to manage. We talk about isolation as well. It’s an intimate conversation, just as you’ve come to expect from us.

What would it look like if you were invited to an orgy and you were excited to go? Would you want to go back again? If you had a partner who was genuinely excited for you to go or perhaps even come with you - would you go?

Let’s say you’ve been going to fun events that involve dating, sex, or kink. You’ve been going long enough people ask you to teach a five minute talk on consent. You practice. You have a decent talk. You’re super nervous. You go up. You crush it. You come off the stage, and people are suddenly more interested in you. People you didn’t have the confidence to approach are now approaching you.

Here’s the rub: power imbalances make ethical sex complicated. I want to say that again: power imbalances make ethical sex complicated.

How do you put down the power of the microphone effect when the microphone is already down? People who just met you while you were on stage holding a microphone don’t care that it was unpaid work you just did. They don’t care that you only have a year’s experience. They have none! Where does your responsibility begin and end?

These are complicated situations that we all too easily find ourselves in, so let’s talk a little about it with our European friends, Olivier from Belgium and Janina from Vienna and Berlin.

Catharsis is the process of getting relief from strong emotions by releasing, expressing, or processing them. Today we’ll talk about different kinds from fantasies to gaming, sex, and kink. Why do we seem fascinated by zombies or the apocalypse? What does experiencing a rough or violent fantasy through BDSM look like and what are some of the many safety measures taken during such a scene? Do we play video games for how they make us feel? Is that feeling cathartic? Let’s get into it with Robin here on Intimate Interactions.

We talk a lot about individual accountability because we’re a very individualistic culture; however community accountability doesn’t just mean being accountable to your community. It also means your community being accountable. In this episode, we’ll talk about some strategies we can use in our events or request our events use for reducing risk of harm.

Two new friends, Olivier from Belgium and Janina from Vienna and Berlin, are keen to talk about those event management tools. What strategies should you research when figuring out how to make your events safer?

Tim is the CEO of CLICKr digital, a pay-per-click and Analytics agency. As a business strategy coach, he teaches sale and marketing and help entrepreneurs scale and grow businesses. So what is he doing on an intimacy podcast?

Well part of exploring human intimacy is my curiosity and fascination about different kinds of people. Tim, while very business oriented, also loves free health care and describes himself as a centrist. In Canada, I would be considered a little left of center and Tim would be considered a little right of center, so it’s always fun to chat with him and we both enjoy each others’ company.

As I’ve watched him change and grow, I’ve wanted to bring him on to chat about relationships: how do you build business relationships? Why is learning to build relationships important for people who run businesses? What are some take-aways we can learn about relationships from business? How has business changed Tim’s life? We’ll explore these questions and others today with Tim, here on Intimate Interactions.

Juniper is a woman who had a severe and serious chronic illness for many years. We met at an after party and had a one night stand once. Since then we’ve met once for coffee briefly many months later but have mostly been distant friends. Today we’ll talk about ADHD and Juniper’s journey to try to figure out if she has it or not. None of this is medical advice and I’m not a doctor. Still, let’s chat with Juniper here on Intimate Interactions.

Today, Robin Beach from sexwithrobin.com talks jealousy. As a sex educator, radio host, relationship consultant, and more, she brings all the experience of her coaching practice to the show just for you! Well actually it’s for a lot of people but I didn’t want you to feel like you weren’t special too. You can see how this stuff gets complicated - but let’s hear from Robin directly on Intimate Interactions.

Tillie, a queer community member, suggested a long time ago to start a project to develop our friendship in a recorded, progressive fashion. They’re back to draw on their chronically ill experience and share all about social support.

This is an episode about support from your social network when your society has failed to provide for the most vulnerable. For those of us who have mobility restrictions or can’t afford winter tires or a vehicle at all, food access can become a thing. This is especially true if you’re struggling with funds. So what does that look like in your circle of friends or found family? How does your community support those who need support?

And while others are using what resources they have to help their loved ones, how do those most at risk cope with anxiety and try to stay functional?

Quick note: part of my ongoing growth to work with my ADHD involves lots of timers all over so I can set louder alarms enabling me to put wet laundry in the dryer or leave my house on time. This is my life as an adult with ADHD. You’ll hear a beeping alarm near the end of the episode. Now, please enjoy another session of Intimate Interactions.

Tim is the CEO of CLICKr digital, a pay-per-click and Analytics agency. As a business strategy coach, he teaches sales and marketing and help entrepreneurs scale and grow businesses. So what is he doing on an intimacy podcast? As an acting student, he started out specialising in emulating human interactions, vulnerability, and intimacy.

Today we’ll chat about relationships in business and the distinction between acting and forming real relationships. When you’re bored of conversation but you’re with someone you care about, is it relationship-forming to smile for them? Is it acting? Is it inauthentic? Tim and I try to figure at least some of that out.

Hope you and your loved ones are healthy and safe. Enjoy the sessions here on intimate interactions.

What can we do to help make the world we live in a more consensual place? How can we reduce the immense damage suffered by humans daily? Sar Surmick, the marriage and family counsellor who was the director of the Consent Academy for quite a while and still teaches with them joins us today to chat about ideas. Let’s try to pick one thing that sounds doable to us and try to practice it in our lives together.

Tillie is back to talk about working from home as a chronically ill person during a pandemic. The more stuff changes, the more it stays the same. Content warning for chatting about no longer feeling suicidal. For all my chronically ill fam out there, we love; keep going. For all you folks working from home like me, two things: we’re a lucky bunch to be able to support ourselves while the economy is so messed up, and many of us living without space for an office are struggling to come up with original solutions. I currently work out of a curtain surround in my dining room. It’s functional. Stay mentally well out there as best you can. We’re stronger together. I hope the session is helpful.

If we know what consent is and how to do it, why is it so hard for so many? Does what I think consent is match what you think consent is? If not, why not? How does this impact how we negotiate our agreements, and how can we get a little better? Marriage and family counsellor Sar Surmick joins us today to chat about how his time leading the Consent Academy and now teaching for them impacts those questions. Let’s see what answers Sar has for us here on Intimate Interactions.