We are all human.
What this means is that for some odd and unexplained reason no mater which negotiation styles or negotiating techniques we are using, we all seem to like things that come in threes. In our world it seems as though all good things come in groups of three. Think about it, your childhood was filled with three bears, three kings, three little pigs, etc.
It turns out that for negotiators, things that come in groups of three can be rewarding as well.
The reason that we enter into a negotiation is because we want to be able to use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to reach a deal with the other side.
The challenge that we have is that what we want and what they want may be two very different things. The whole purpose of a negotiation is for us to find a way to build bridges between our two opposing camps and find some common ground that both of us can live with. The one thing that we don’t want to have happen is for us to run into an impasse – that would be a negotiation failure.
What can we do to make sure that this does not happen?
I can only speak for myself, but I have no problem sharing with you that during a negotiation I can become very, very frustrated with how things are going.
No matter if your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques are causing things to go too slow, go off in the wrong direction, or, even worse, not go anywhere. I start to become angrier and angrier as time passes. This, of course, leads to a fairly classic negotiating question.
When you become angry during a negotiation, should you hide your emotions or should you show them to the other side?
Not every negotiation that we are involved in will work out for us.
In fact, some of them will fail. When we think of failed negotiations, generally we picture negotiators walking away from the table in disappointment. It turns out that that’s only one type of disappointing negotiation. It turns out that there is another type of failure when it comes to negotiating. A negotiation can be considered to be a failure when both sides come to regret the deal over time as well as those deals that fall apart during implementation.
As negotiators, we need to learn how to avoid creating deals that will become failures.
It eventually happens to all of us: you are in the middle of negotiation when you realized that things have become deadlocked.
There are a lot of different ways that you may have found yourself in this situation such as after both sides have used their negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to exchange a series of offers and counteroffers. With each of you stuck in your very different positions, you can’t seem to find a solution that pleases you both.
What’s a negotiator to do now?
When we negotiate, it’s all about winning.
Our goal is to use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to create a deal that the other side will agree with and which is a win for us. We can define a “win” in a lot of different ways: a lower price, a higher price, more time to deliver, delivery sooner then expected, etc. However, somewhat surprisingly, not all negotiations work out this way.
Sometimes lose-lose is the way that you want to go.
When you are negotiating a sale, you’d like to be able to use your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques get the other side to agree to the offer that you are making to them.
There are a number of different ways to make this happen. In sales negotiations, making the first offer is often a smart move. The reason that this is a good idea is because the first offer can anchor the discussion that follows and can have a powerful effect on the final outcome. However, if the other side moves faster than you and they make the first offer, you’ll need to be prepared to frame your counteroffer carefully.
You are going to need some sales negotiation techniques to get what you want.
The reason that we are willing to invest the time in a negotiation is because we believe that by using our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques we’ll be able to eventually reach a deal with the other side.
However, in order to make that happen, at some point in time the negotiations have to come to an end. We need to close them down. In the movie Glengarry Glen Ross Alec Baldwin’s character tells his employees “ABC: Always Be Closing”. This is not a good idea – it’s a bit cutthroat and it means that you have to ignore the other side’s needs.
What’s the right way to wrap up a negotiation?
We’ve all heard about mutually beneficial agreements, but can anyone say just exactly what they are?
By one definition, a mutually beneficial agreement occurs when both sides of the table attempt to use their negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to grab as much as they possibly can from the limited amount of items that are being negotiated. I think that a much better definition has to do with taking the time to create more value during a negotiation and then making sure that everyone is taken care of in the final deal.
Great words, but just exactly how does one go about doing this?
In the world of negotiating, we all run into negotiating situations that can be stressful.
The other side gets upset with us for some reason, they rant and rave and make a wide variety of threats, we try to keep things moving forward and ultimately if we are lucky we are able to reach a deal with them. Just imagine how hard it would be to be a member of the New York City Police Department’s Hostage Negotiation Team. Every negotiation that they go into is going to be stressful.
How the heck do they deal with negotiations like that?
So first off let’s all agree on something: I don’t really care if you love or hate President Donald Trump.
That’s not what I’m talking about. Instead, considering that he’s in a very powerful position in which he gets to talk to world leaders on a daily basis, I’m interested in how good of a negotiator he is. He did write / co-author a book on negotiating and so you’d think that he’d be pretty good at this stuff.
Let’s take a look and see what techniques he has been using as a part of his presidency so far.
You might think that every principled negotiation starts out the same way: with a blank sheet of paper.
However, in a number of situations that I’ve found myself in this is not the case. Instead, what has happened is that for whatever reason because of the negotiation styles and negotiating techniques being used, my client allowed themselves to get sucked into signing a bad deal. Now they find themselves living with a deal that is not in their best interests and they want to have it changed. Enter the (re) negotiator.
What’s the best way to turn a bad deal into a better deal?
What would the perfect negotiation look like to you?
Would it happen if you sat down at the negotiating table, presented the other side with an offer without using any of your negotiation styles or negotiating techniques, they accepted it and everything was over and done? Immediately sensing that you asked for too little, you would probably feel as though you had screwed up. In a negotiation, we’re often excited to close a deal. But at times, the fact that we’ve “won” a prize means that we’ve become the latest victim of the “winner’s curse”.
The good news for you is that there are steps you can take to avoid the winner’s curse in negotiations.
If we want to become better negotiators, how can we go about doing this?
It turns out that the best bargaining tips should offer ways to enhance your bargaining power in negotiation no matter what negotiation styles or negotiating techniques are being used. If we want to make this happen, then we must cultivate a strong BATNA, or best alternative to a negotiated agreement. As you can well imagine, the more appealing your best alternative is, the more comfortable you will feel asking for more in your current negotiation – you will be secure in the knowledge that you have a good alternative option waiting in the wings. BATNA development is more complex than just searching for a good Plan B.
Let’s talk about bargaining tips and strategies for negotiators seeking to improve their BATNA.
As negotiators, what we would all like to be able to do during each of our negotiations is to find a way to create a “win-win” situation.
These are the negotiations in which both sides emerge feeling that they got a good deal in the end no matter what negotiation styles or negotiating techniques were used. However, finding this kind of solution to a negotiation can be a real challenge.
What we need are ways to make this happen even in even the trickiest negotiations.
If you sit back and think about it, what are you really trying to accomplish during a negotiation with all of your fancy negotiation styles and negotiating techniques?
If you are like most of us, what you would like to be able to do is to discover additional value that nobody realized was there, perhaps make some useful trades with the other side, and finally come up with a deal that will exceed both sides initial expectations.
All of this sounds wonderful; however, how can a negotiator actually make this happen?
One of the more popular phrases that has been used during the past few years has been “emotional intelligence”.
This term first burst into the cultural imagination in 1995 with the publication of psychologist Daniel Goleman’s book. Negotiation experts have predicted that scoring high on this personality trait would boost one’s negotiating outcomes and have found many successful negotiation examples using emotional intelligence.
Does this mean that during your next negotiation you need to pay more attention to your emotional intelligence?
Let’s face it: there are a lot of different types of negotiations that we can find ourselves in the middle of any any point in time.
As negotiators we need to be able to recognize each one of them and then take the appropriate action in order to maximize the chances of being able to get the deal that we want. One type of negotiation that we most often find ourselves involved in is called a distributive negotiation.
Do you know what to do when this happens?
One of the most powerful negotiation styles and negotiating techniques that a negotiator has available to them is what is called “anchoring”.
Anchoring occurs when a negotiation is starting and you make an initial offer to the other side. This offer does not have to be one that you think that they would actually accept. It can be quite arbitrary. The power of an anchor offer is that it pulls the discussion in its direction.
How can you use this powerful technique to your best advantage?
Let’s face it: conflict happens in every negotiation.
The very process of negotiating using our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques with someone seems to open the door to allowing conflict to come in. How do we deal with conflict when it shows up? All too often our first response is to try to find a way to correct the way that the other side is seeing the world. We’ll take the time to tell them why they are wrong and, of course, why we are right. The problem with this approach is that it rarely works and will often make the current situation even worse.
What we need is a different way to deal with conflict situations.
When you are in the middle of a negotiation, how do decisions get made?
All too often a lot of us end up leaving these types of decisions up to chance no matter what negotiation styles or negotiating techniques we are using. These decisions can take on a lot of different disguises including if we are talking with the best person to be doing the negotiating for the other side, if we’ll negotiate in person, what will be talked about, how long it will last, etc.
We need to take the time to ask ourselves about how we want to design the deal that we want to get.
When we think about negotiating, we tend to think about how to apply our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to business situations.
We may be buying or selling supplies, purchasing a location, or trying to schedule the delivery of a product. However, it turns out that our negotiating skills are also useful for us when we are not at work. In our personal lives, we encounter a number of different situations that call for our particular set of skills.
One classic situation, whether for us or for someone that we know, is the purchase of a new car.
The next time that you enter into a negotiation, how do you want the other side to view you?
If you are like most of us who have had our impression of what a world-class negotiator looks like shaped by television and the movies: when we use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques we want to come across as being a tough guy, unyielding and bound to get our way no matter what. However, what researchers have discovered is that negotiators with a reputation for collaboration rather than competition tend to do better. You can’t fully control what others think and say about you, none of us can, but you can find ways to seize opportunities to appear as cooperative as possible during and after a business negotiation.
Here’s how to do this.
When we picture ourselves in a negotiation, we often see ourselves using our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to make a point.
Or perhaps at the board drawing out a scenario. Or maybe even handing papers to the other side for them to review. What we don’t often see is ourselves on the defensive. However, if the other side consists of skilled negotiators, there is a very good chance that at some point in time during the negotiations we’re going to end up with our backs to the wall.
What we need are some defensive strategies that we can use when this happens to us.
When we enter into a negotiation, we’d like to think that our minds are clear and that we are gong to be able to think systematically throughout the negotiations as we use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques.
However, all too often it turns out that we are being affected by bias that can change how we think. Most of us believe that we have the ability to determine the difference between a situation in which we can rely on our intuition and those that require us to take a step back and give things some more thought.
However, studies have shown that in most cases we are wrong.
The next time that you start a negotiation, what will be running through your mind?
If you are like most of us, you are excited to get started and you have a fairly clear idea what negotiation styles and negotiating techniques you’ll be using to get what you want out of this negotiation. However, have you really done your homework?
If you want your next negotiation to be successful, then what you do before the negotiation starts may determine how it turns out.
When we start a negotiation, we are filled with hope that by using our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques we’ll be able to eventually walk away with a deal.
However, during every negotiation we are faced with two possible mistakes we can make. The first is that we end up walking away from a deal that we should have agreed to. The other is that we end up agreeing to a deal that we should never have agreed to.
How can we avoid making both of these errors?
So who will you be negotiating with during your next negotiation? Are you going to be dealing with a hard bargainer?
There are some negotiators out there who seem to think that if they want to get their way in a negotiation then they are going to have to use hard-bargaining negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to make it happen. This means that they’ll have no problems resorting to using extreme demands, unethical behavior and perhaps even threats to get what they want. These are the very negotiators who don’t realize that negotiation is not a win-lose activity.
However, since you’ll be dealing with them, what should you do when they start to apply their hard bargaining tactics on you?
When we are engaged in a negotiation, no matter what negotiation styles or negotiating techniques are being used we can make the mistake of falling into common cognitive traps if we are not careful.
These traps are sneaky and if we are not on the lookout for them then they can sneak up on us and they’ll end up holding us back from accomplishing what we are trying to do in this negotiation. When we do this, we end up making the negotiation that we are involved in more difficult than it has to be.
In order to prevent this from happening, we need to learn how to identify the four different traps.
As negotiators we all understand that one of the most powerful tools that we have are concessions.
However, it’s how we view concessions that really matters. All too often a negotiator can come to view concessions as being a big deal – they are something that has value to us and making a concession that really means something is going to end up costing us something in terms of money, time, or something else. However, this is where we may be wrong. It turns out that we can often keep a negotiation moving along simply by making a token concession.
This type of concession costs us very little, but it can make a big impact on our negotiation.
So here’s a question for you negotiator: just exactly what is a mutually beneficial agreement?
Sure, we all think that we’d like to be able to use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to reach one of these in our next negotiation, but would we recognize it if we saw it? One way to define this is to view a mutually beneficial agreement as being one in which each side grabs as much as it can from a finite pot of resources. Hopefully you don’t view it this way. A much better way to view it is as competitive value-claiming with collaborative value creation.
Now the big question becomes just exactly how to go about doing this.
If there is one thing that all negotiators know and understand is that in order to be able to reach a deal with the other side, you first have to be able to trust them.
We also understand that during the course of a negotiation, trust is something that may develop naturally over time. However, sometimes we can’t wait that long. If we don’t trust the other side, we can still make safe deals with them. These types of deals will involve using our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to make few concessions, few tradeoffs, and we won’t share very much information with the other side. However, deals like this may mean that we are missing out on big opportunities.
What we need to do is to find way to build trust on the fly…
Let’s face it – there are a lot of different moving parts to the game of negotiating with all of the different negotiation styles and negotiating techniques that are out there.
When we spend time thinking about how we can become better negotiators, it can be all too easy for us to very quickly become overwhelmed.
When this happens, we generally end up delaying taking any steps to become better. In order to take this large task and break it down into something that is more manageable, we need some guidelines on how to proceed.
So here’s an interesting thought for you: when is a negotiation over and done with?
I suspect that most of us would say once the deal has been signed by all parties. It turns out that this is not the case. Instead, reaching a deal with the other side and having that deal signed may just be the start of your negotiations.
Are you ready for this?
Congratulations – you are a negotiator! This is an impressive accomplishment. However, now you are facing the question of what’s next?
We would all like to become better negotiators and boost our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques; however, often we find ourselves unsure of how we can make this happen. The good news is that being a negotiator means that you’ve mastered a large set of skills. In order to become a better negotiator, you simply have to identify additional key skills and master those also.
Let’s take a look at what you still have to learn.
This business of negotiating is a tricky business indeed. No, we don’t always want to show up at the negotiating table and use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to lay all of our cards out in front of the other side. However, there appears to be a fine line when it comes to lying.
Just exactly how far is too far?
More importantly for you as a negotiator, how should you handle it if when you are negotiating with someone you start to realize that they are not being truthful with you?
Yes, yes – I’m sure that we’ve all at least heard of the book “Getting To Yes” and with a little luck a number of us have actually read it. The gist of the book is that you can use your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to negotiate better deals if you can find a way to create a deal that benefits both parties.
This “win-win” deal is highly desirable, but at times it can appear to be very hard to achieve.
As negotiators, what we need are some tips for our next negotiation that will show us how we can make win-win work for us.
If ever there was a fundamental question in negotiation, it would probably not be which negotiation styles or negotiating techniques to use, but rather it would have to be the classic “should I make the first offer or wait for the other side to make the first offer” question.
For the longest time, the thinking went that we should sit back and allow the other side to make the first offer. The reason for this was so that we could learn valuable information based on what they asked for. However, negotiating research has shown that the cost of waiting for the other side to make an offer far outweighs the benefits of us making the first offer.
Looks like we’ve got some research to do…
Let’s face it – negotiating is not an easy thing to do. There is all of the preparation that goes into it, there is the effort of actually doing it using all of our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques, and then, with a little luck, there will be a deal that both sides will agree to when it’s all over.
Unfortunately it can be all too easy for us to do one of the two things that we really should not do: reach a deal with the other side when we really should not or walk away from a deal that we should have agreed to.
In order to prevent this from occurring we need to take the time to prepare for each negotiation and, as a part of doing this, take the time to analyze the zone of possible agreement (ZOPA) for this negotiation.
If this was a perfect world, then every time that you went into a negotiation you would be facing someone who was doing this for the first time. They would be unsure of themselves and they would end up making all sorts of very basic mistakes.
However, it’s not a perfect world and more often than not you are going to find yourself sitting across the table from a skilled negotiator who is wise to all of your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques.
When this happens, you are going to have to make sure that you have the defensive negotiation strategies that you’ll need in order to get the job done.
So just exactly how does a negotiation end? Either both parties give up and walk away with no deal being reached, or you are somehow able to use your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to find a way to close the deal.
It’s this deal closing thing that can be so tricky to do sometimes. In fact, we can find ourselves in situations where we have tried to wrap things up, get the other side to agree to a deal, and we’ve failed. When we find ourselves in this kind of a situation, what is a negotiator to do? Give up?
Nope, you need to go back in there and try to wrap this negotiation up. You just might have been doing it all wrong.
Welcome to the modern world that we are all living in! In the old days, if you wanted to negotiate with someone you had to show up, sit down at the negotiation table, and then proceed to use your negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to have a lengthy discussion with them.
In our modern times, this is no longer necessary – we can now negotiate online. However, as negotiators we need to understand that negotiating online is very different from negotiating in person. There are different challenges that we are gong to have to be prepared to deal with.
Despite the fact that we’ll be negotiating online, we are still going to be looking for ways to create both value and rapport with the other side.
At lot of us go into a negotiation like we are getting ready to go to war. We do our research, make sure that we know who we’re going to be going up against, prepare our demands and then use our negotiation styles and negotiating techniques to charge into battle. To us a negotiation is all about competition. The more points that we can score, the better the chance that we’re going to win this negotiation and the other side is going to lose. However, maybe we’ve been looking at this all wrong. Is it possible that the goal of any negotiation should be about creating value?