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Jamie talks about healing her trauma pattern of being told she's, "not good enough for anything." She spent her childhood and teenage years being mistreated by family and school teachers. She was hit with a paddle by a biblical teacher and her father threatened her with a gun. Jamie overcame what could ruin a person. If you are feeling lost, listen to Jamies vulnerability and attitude. She is happily married with three kids and works hard as a nurse helping others. She is a true inspiration for overcoming what could feel impossible.

I'm sharing an example of one of our weekly classes from my Holden Release Program. This shows how I work one on one with clients to help them overcome their overthinking, overwhelm and stress to get unstuck. Not everyone comes to class. They are recorded for people in the group to watch later. 0:00 the one thing I constantly hear that people struggle with, boundaries 0:18 guided meditation going within, putting yourself first 6:00 example session working with Chris 8:00 stuck in the head, where is my body 8:45 getting out of the head exercise 15:50 sharing two fun thoughts from my yoga teacher 19:15 getting specific with what Chris's thoughts are 26:23 getting out of the head and let the emotion happen 30:00 understanding our parents, the good and the bad 30:40 Chris sharing about his dad and what he didn't get 35:10 Chris getting calmer 39:00 Chris and Linda sharing how it was living with checked out parents 42:00 understanding the nervous system, giving ourselves what we never got 45:00 catching triggers, tools for doing the work or getting support you need 47:00 Closing meditation, asking for what you need, and the right timing If you want to know more you can always book a brief call with me here. https://link.flowi.io/widget/bookings/holdenrelease-enroll Get my Free Guide: https://pages.holdenreleasemethod.com/guide-1 Or read more about some daily tools you can use here in my Books: https://www.karleeholden.com/books-2https://www.facebook.com/getanswerspodcast/https://www.karleeholden.com

I have only been working with Sandra a few months. She immediately started to use the tools for self care, and how to implement boundaries. Her life and her relationships are changing fast, all for the better. If you want more information how to work with me, you can book your Free Call here. https://link.flowi.io/widget/bookings/holdenrelease-enroll If interested in more information on calming the nervous system sign up for my mailing list. https://pages.holdenreleasemethod.com/guide-1 Moving Forward From Trauma Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/795941618322128 My personal trauma healing journey and tips on self love https://www.karleeholden.com/books-2

How come Mothers affect us so much? They have the power to help us or hurt us. Here are some tips to heal our relationships with our Mothers, so we can understand what they go through and what we go through, since we all have Mothers.

I discuss in the first chapter of my book (Can You Please Talk To My Trauma) what I learned from the rich and famous people I had relationships with. I quickly learned that they weren't happy and why this was the case.   The ego makes us feel like whatever we achieve isn't enough. The present spiritual moment is enough, where true happiness resides. How do we get more of that.  The joy really is in the journey. The destination is not the happiness.

We carry tension and pain in our bodies when we are stressed and our nervous system goes into fight flight freeze mode. Tension in the body is from the emotions we hang onto. Our emotions rest in the body and they can lay dormant unaware to us.   How we can start to unwind our emotions and tension:  1. Be aware of what is happening in the body, the heart, the gut. There are lots of signals. Strengthen intuition to take care of yourself. 2. Get to the root of what is bothering you from the present and the past. 3. Release the stress hormones by asking for support and getting the right tools.  This strengthens our immune system and changes our environment, our reality.  For more information about my Holden Release Program where I work side by side with you, schedule a Free call with me. Click HERE to schedule. https://link.flowi.io/widget/bookings/holdenrelease-enroll

What can we take away from every experience we go through?   How can we learn to be better through any incident or circumstance that comes our way. No matter how hard a situation may seem there is a lesson, a growth, a beautiful light at the end of the tunnel.   We found one after a burglar came to our house yesterday. I looked at myself and asked how can I grow from this and what can I teach my daughter. I believe whatever is coming into my reality is showing me something important and something to learn.  Have you been through something difficult and relaized it was a blessing? Please share!

Don't wait when to reach out and get some guidance when you don't feel good. Your body, your feelings, your sensations, like anxiety and fear will let you know when something needs to be addressed, needs attention, support and healing.  I recently had this happen. To hear more watch this video on what happened to me and what I did to fix it.  

https://www.facebook.com/groups/795941618322128 

https://www.karleeholden.com/books-2

It's important to find what gives you energy and makes you happy. Putting yourself first so you are fulfilled and full of ambition and joy radiates that love and joy to all others. We want peace, we must start with ourselves.   Lori Kennedy's Wellness Business Hub to do an online course. https://thewellnessbusinesshub.com

Interview with my client Gloria on how she healed her seizures by understanding her seizures were connected to her abusive childhood.  She transformed her pain to purpose by working with me and on herself. She’s brave and powerful with all she faced to change her past and her present life. She used the tools and did the work and is now living a better life and creating a brighter healthier future.

Talking to my Dad about the power of clearing out old emotional and mental programming and pain that gets locked in us. Sometimes we don't even know that it is there. What we can do to start to get clear and feel better is ask for support and get tools to release the pain.

I would have liked to know that I could stick up for myself and have healthy responses like saying, “No, that is not ok.”

• Walk away.
• Ask for support when bullied or mistreated.
• Get away from unhealthy situations instead of staying in them. I would have made better choices about what friends, teachers and sports to be in to support my wellbeing.

I remember being a kid/teen like it was yesterday. I love being a parent and giving my kids all the tools I wish I would have known.

Would you like to give your kids more helpful tools now?

Come to my Masterclass this Monday Feb 6th and hear about the tools I learned the last twenty years in my career that transformed my life and my clients. Click link to register and save your spot.

https://karleeholden.click/live-training?fbclid=IwAR1sba_NBMhec-xb5JhKcanz_1nIVJtK1MzOJ_ie5o5aeu_kK7-aA1fAWDI

This is what I teach teens now so they can have a better adult life.

When I worked in the film industry in Hollywood I immediately learned about celebrities depression and suicide. These days I am hearing about teens and suicide. The media portrays suicide as the event of what happened, the overdose etc. What I always wondered is why the media doesn’t show the deeper root cause of why people take their lives? Even people who have so much going for them, love, money, fame, attention, families, do this?   On my journey to becoming a trauma practitioner I learned people don’t want to kill themselves, they want to kill the pain that is not resolved. What is unresolved pain?   I write about this in the first chapter of my book Can You Please Talk To My Trauma.  By the end of the book I explain how I woke up to what my trauma was and what I did to heal my symptoms.   The deeper root of all of our pain goes back to childhood. Unless the pain patterns we learned from growing up are addressed they get worse the older we get. They lay dormant and then get triggered. For example, Robin Williams pain goes back to being bullied and physically harassed in 6th grade. And at home in order to connect with his mother he had to make her laugh, it wan’t enough to just be Robin. Our school life is a reflection of our home life. Both need to be addressed.   I have a 7th grade daughter and watching kids be bullied and mean without knowing what to do is so hard. This is when the tools to have healthy responses to know how to stick up for oneself or ask for support are deeply needed in order to prevent a life of more bullying, depression and suicide. If a person is not getting the love and support they need at home and are bullied, they don’t have the tools to release that emotional pain. This pain gets trapped in the body creating trauma symptoms that can lead to suicide.   There are tools out there to release this pain, not just from the mind, it has to be released from the body, the nervous system. Fight flight freeze completion is vital to moving forward in life with peace and grace. This completion can happen anytime with the right support and guidance.   

To hear more about this join me for my Live Masterclass this Monday Feb. 6th, 12pm PST. Click link to register and get the link to join.  https://karleeholden.click/live-training?fbclid=IwAR1sba_NBMhec-xb5JhKcanz_1nIVJtK1MzOJ_ie5o5aeu_kK7-aA1fAWDI 

https://www.karleeholden.com/books-2

I am talking to my client and friend Connie I have known for over ten years. She learned to walk again when all doctors and others told her she wouldn't be able too. This is when I met Connie. She shares what she has learned and how she has overcome her trauma to continuing growing gin her remarkable life she has created today.

I used to get so nervous every time I went to be worked on in my Somatic Experiencing training as I was the demonstration in front of a big group of people doing the training with me. I was working on my pain with many eyes watching me. I knew they were loving supportive eyes as they were on the same page as me. I felt grateful and scared.  I even felt this way in my one on one therapy sessions. I literally felt like running. I knew it wasn't the help I was running from. I was running from my past. A past I still needed to get away from. Knowing this kept me going and asking for help, plus the relief and clarity I felt every time I worked on myself was amazing.  It is totally normal to feel scared or anxious when asking for help. Here's how I look at it. The body and emotions get excited that we are giving it attention, to honor all we have been through.  It is like a little kid jumping up and down with excitement saying, "Yay, you are finally looking at me. I need you. I have some things to say and feel. Please hear me."    Have you felt this way?

Wellness Wednesday!

How To Start Cultivating Self Love - Even A Little Bit Goes A long Way.  Are you tired of feeling broken hearted, having low self-esteem, wanting love from outside sources and not receiving it? Start giving it to yourself now.Be gentle with yourselves. You've been through a lot. This human experience isn't easy.

Marissa Castello is interviewing me about why it is so important and how to heal trauma!

It's important to remind ourselves and our bodies we are safe. We come from thousands of years of fight, flight, freeze, responses. Plus a lot of us have gone through something, stress is normal. Feeling scared and unsafe is not. Do whatever you can to make yourself feel safe and bring your awareness to this peaceful safe feeling you conjure up. When we calm ourselves we improve our health and immune systems. Remember things like denial and manipulation can make you feel very unsafe. Truth set us free and makes us safe because we know what we are dealing with.

I am reading from page 40 of Can You Please Talk To My Girlfriend Book. It is about determining your value first on the inside. Don't let the outer world determine your value. You decide who you are and what you want to be first! Then let the outer world reflect that!

Start to build that bridge between what is happening in your body and what is happening in your life. Sometimes when energy starts to move it can feel scary. Reframe it to energy in my body is moving and it is excited to come out and get the love and support it needs to be heard. 1. Notice what your breath is doing instead of trying to force a deep breath. Where are you holding tension, and what sensations are doing in your body. For example anxiety may feel tight and bubbly in your stomach. 2. Observe your breath, the tension and sensations that are coming up. Don't try and change them. Watch them and see what happens next. Something may shift, some tension may dissolve or emotion come up. 3. Tell those parts I am listening, I love you, I am here. Soften and ground into what is. In this state we can start to draw in the resources and support we need to feel safe and release the stress to move on and be free.

Take a few minutes everyday to connect to your beautiful Self. I'll guide you through a brief mediation, that you can pause and spend more time on, or just do a few minutes to start and end your day. Open up to the possibility of feeling the bliss within your Soul, within you.

Lonely vs. alone. What's the difference? I found out the difference when I was at a movie theater by myself, it hit me, the joy of being alone rather than the pain of being lonely. Lonely is an old trauma pattern that can be banished once and for all. We can step into and embrace the independence and love of being alone with our beautiful selves. Book available on Amazon and Audible. https://karleeholden.com/books-2

It's normal to feel like we need to defend or explain ourselves. The good news is we don't need to. Most people don't care what are explanations are anyways. It is a waste of energy to explain or defend yourself. Of course there are times and certain circumstances this may be necessary. I am talking about why you missed someones call or you didn't want to go out. Honor yourself and know it's ok to say no, no thank you. You can return a call or text when you are ready and be present. Bring awareness to yourself and others when you notice unnecessary defending happening.

There is a way to heal stress and trauma, symptoms of anxiety, suicidal thoughts, overwhelm, depression, ocd, ptsd, and get to a place where you are feeling free, peaceful, and happy. I share how I did this. My online course, books, and videos will give you information to understand and release your pain, and get to a place where you can sit in stillness and feel connection and love for yourself, the Divine (God) and others.

How can we find balance in our life and relationship with social media and tv. Here's a challenge I like to do. However much time I spend on social media or tv, I spend mediating and self reflecting. Give it a try and tell me what you think.

The truth does set us free. It's helpful to know why our lives and emotions are the way they are. Understanding our patterns from where we grew up and what triggers us, helps us on our way to becoming free. What can we do right away to change. Become aware and real about what is.

The book Don't Be Nice, Be Real by Kelly Bryson explains what happens to us when we are nice and not real. How our emotions get stuffed down and this lead to all sorts of problems. You're not doing yourself or anyone else any favors by being nice. Being real is healthy and what is best for us.

This is a brief outline for my Online Course (available soon),  in Emotional Strength and Overcoming Stress and Trauma Symptoms.  Feeling overwhelmed, stressed, and traumatized can be confusing. I want to make stress and trauma symptoms more simple to tackle. To help people get to a place of understanding and clarity, and to get to a balanced mental, emotional, and physically strong state.  

These 5 tips are what really helped me clear away confusion and become grounded in understanding and strength about who I am and what I want.  

1.What goes in must come out 

 2. Boundaries 

3. Completion of fight flight, coming our of freeze 

4. From Denial to Truth 

5. Support  

https://karleeholden.com https://www.audible.com/pd/B0912TYH58/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-245111&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_245111_rh_us https://www.audible.com/pd/B0912KBSTT/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-245122&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_245122_rh_us https://www.amazon.com/Can-You-Please-Talk-Trauma/dp/B0912PC597/ref=sr_1_1?crid=SRXXZ2VMJFJG&dchild=1&keywords=can+you+please+talk+to+my+trauma&qid=1617516026&sprefix=can+you+please+tal%2Caps%2C221&sr=8-1 #trauma #stress #emotionalstrength #whatgoesinmustcomeout #boundaries #completionoffightflight #freeze #boundaries #denial #truth #support

The secret to happy relationships lies within the relationship you have with yourself. Ask yourself these three questions:  Do you treat yourself kindly? Do you talk to yourself the same way you talk to your loved ones? Do you make time to pursue your passions? Here is something you can start doing TODAY to increase your self-worth and self respect! Start meditating and developing an inner connection with yourself and something greater than yourself.

Make it a ritual and make it fun. Meditation is about contemplation and focusing the mind on one thing. Learning to let the thoughts flow by without engaging with any one of them and come back to the present. You don't have to be in the Himalayas to meditate. Bringing your attention to your breath, your body, and devotion to something greater than yourself is a great way to practice.  Here are the three key areas I love to focus on when meditating:  --Think about 5 things that I am grateful for today.  --Set an intention for the day.  --Remind myself of what makes me excited about being alive, a goal and devotion to a Higher Power.  For more tips check out my book "Can you Please Talk to my Girlfriend" https://www.amazon.com/Can-You-Please-Talk-Girlfriend/dp/B08924HV6Y Self Realization Fellowship by Parmahansa Yogananda has great home study lessons and books on meditation and creating a deeper spiritual connection and so does Dr. Joe Dispenza.  https://www.yogananda-srf.org/ https://drjoedispenza.com/ https://karleeholden.com https://www.audible.com/pd/B0912TYH58/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-245111&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_245111_rh_us https://www.audible.com/pd/B0912KBSTT/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-245122&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_245122_rh_us https://www.amazon.com/Can-You-Please-Talk-Trauma/dp/B0912PC597/ref=sr_1_1?crid=SRXXZ2VMJFJG&dchild=1&keywords=can+you+please+talk+to+my+trauma&qid=1617516026&sprefix=can+you+please+tal%2Caps%2C221&sr=8-1 No Rules to Meditate: Keep it Simple and Just Start Going Within  #norulestomeditate #meditation #heartmeditation #SRF #drjoedispenza #selfrealizationfellwoship No Rules to Meditation: Focusing on Gratitude Love and Forgiveness,gratitude meditation,short meditation music relax mind body,intentional living 2021,guided meditation merging with your higher self,quick meditation for positive energy,No Rules to Meditation: Focusing on Gratitude,Love and Forgiveness,No Rules to Meditate  No Rules to Meditate: Keep it Simple and Just Start Going Within

It can be uncomfortable building our self worth to go for the things we want in life. Pushing through those fears and taking action anyways can transform the unpleasant to invigorating.   I hope to help support you in your journey in digging deep within and finding that courage. You are just as worthy as anyone else of the things you want in life. Don't let anyone or anything stop you from taking action toward your passions.

What do we do when we feel like we have lost something we love? What can we do when our hearts have been through love, pain, heart break, betrayal, etc.? How do we deal with feelings of incredible love then incredible loss to incredibly numb. Here are some exercises to do to start to mend and open a beating heart.   How to tap into the innate love that is in all our hearts and where love lives no matter what we have been through, even when we cannot feel it. Even though something we love may be gone, the love is not. How do we wrap our heads around that? We can physically and emotionally heal and expand the love in our hearts, and by uplifting ourselves, we uplift others.  Take a few minutes to connect with your heart.  Feeling love and gratitude is a skill and like any skill, it takes practice. In this episode I walk you through a guided heart meditation, and ways to practice feeling love. The more you focus on love the more you will remain present in you heart throughout your day. Love lives in the present. If it feels hard to get present and you are focused on your past, you may have some unresolved emotions to work through. That is ok and need to be done so that you can get back to the beautiful love in your heart now.

Family patterns shape us and they can be broken. This is how learn to have boundaries and understand why we haven't had them.

If you are struggling to get pregnant, had miscarriages, or are dealing with infertility know that you are not alone. I share my struggles and what I went through in order to get pregnant, and some tools that helped me along the way.

https://karleeholden.com https://www.audible.com/pd/B0912TYH58/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-245111&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_245111_rh_us https://www.audible.com/pd/B0912KBSTT/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-245122&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_245122_rh_us https://www.amazon.com/Can-You-Please-Talk-Trauma/dp/B0912PC597/ref=sr_1_1?crid=SRXXZ2VMJFJG&dchild=1&keywords=can+you+please+talk+to+my+trauma&qid=1617516026&sprefix=can+you+please+tal%2Caps%2C221&sr=8-1 

#gettingpregnant #infertility #miscarriages #gettingpregnantinyour40s

It can be difficult to change your emotional responses to triggers. Think of a person or situation that is in your life today that makes you uncomfortable, stressed, angry or sad. Just the thought of that person or moment can make your body feel as if it's right in front of you in the present moment. Those bodily reactions dictate your response and if just a thought causes you to feel these negative emotions, it means you are very well practiced at these responses. This is the pattern created by your nervous system.   The first step of changing these patterns and the ultimate goal of no longer having these triggers is becoming aware of what causes the triggers and catching your patterned responses. This is easier said than done. Think, you could have months, years or a life time of these patterned responses so breaking these habits may take time and lots of practice.    Remember, if a person affects you negatively don't try to change them,  you can only change yourself and how you respond. Resist the temptation of trying to convince someone to change.    Once you start catching these moments, your body's emotional responses will  change over time and that person or situation will no longer cause those feelings or bodily sensations.   This is where tests come in, once you've conquered the person or situations often times a new person or situation come in. This is your chance to prove that you've learned to change your response and it is that test that tells your nervous system that you are not going to let these people or moments affect you the same way they did before. You have established healthier responses.

If you are constantly stressed, depressed, numb or in shock your body and mind are not able to function to their full potential. Similar to how lack of sleep plays a huge part in your mental clarity, your emotions and stress levels directly affect your digestion. In this episode I share some tips how you can release tension in your mid section.

Two old friends discussing the healing power of Music, Friendship and being Vulnerable. Karlee interviews Singer/multitalented musician Gillian Harwin.   

In this interview we share the importance of being honest about how you're feeling, your state of being. If you're not ok, the first step is to admit it, don't deny or cover up your emotions. Your emotions are energy and that energy needs to be released. Sharing with others using music can be extremely therapeutic, freeing and stress relieving.   

Similar to what Dr. Joe Dispenza shares in his programs, Karlee and Gillian combine somatic experience with music therapy to get present and out of the past.  If your mind is stuck on a past moment or in shock from some emotionally charged past experience your body and mind are reliving that experience each and everyday. Think of a vivid dream that has you frightened for your life and then there comes a moment that you finally realize you're only dreaming. The fear and panic completely subside.  Present thinking is that moment you realize it's only a dream.  

https://karleeholden.com https://www.audible.com/pd/B0912TYH58/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-245111&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_245111_rh_us https://www.audible.com/pd/B0912KBSTT/?source_code=AUDFPWS0223189MWT-BK-ACX0-245122&ref=acx_bty_BK_ACX0_245122_rh_us https://www.amazon.com/Can-You-Please-Talk-Trauma/dp/B0912PC597/ref=sr_1_1?crid=SRXXZ2VMJFJG&dchild=1&keywords=can+you+please+talk+to+my+trauma&qid=1617516026&sprefix=can+you+please+tal%2Caps%2C221&sr=8-1 #stress #trauma #ptsd #support #eckharttolle #awareness #denial #truth

Have you ever noticed if you are holding your breath or it is very shallow due to being in stressful situations? With awareness we can change anything. Denial is a big part of trauma and being stressed out. It's amazing when we face the truth and get real with awareness and support everything seems to soften and lighten. Truth does set us free. The pain body can make us feel we are the only ones in the world suffering. As we learn from Eckhart Tolle we all have a pain body and we are not alone on this journey. Every pain we explore and share with others helps someone else heal their pain.

What is anxiety? Where is it located inside us? Why do we have it?  1. Connect to the anxiety and find where it is in your body. 2. Go within and find the sensation? Like tight, fast, sharp, heavy, etc. 3. Ask the anxiety what is the positive intention? Behind every negative emotion is a positive intention trying to help us feel safe.  What am I learning from this anxiety? What is the lesson? Bringing awareness to your body and listening to it's signals help us learn what we need to do for ourselves to feel better and take appropriate action to be safe.  If the signals and anxiety feel too big to look at on your own, ask for help right away.  What people and situations are giving you anxiety? Find the pattern.

How do we get over anxiety, reduce stress, and get over severe trauma symptoms? Having a healthy fight flight response to adverse situations from the past or present helps. What did I not get to do or say? We as humans want to say or do what we never got to and there is no time when it comes to this. Time doesn't necessarily heal, completion does. Doing this with the right support is so freeing from past burdens and can help us be more present in  our lives.

1. Everyone has their own story and issues, their own internal world and interpretations, that vary from person to person.

2. We want love and understanding, don’t try to get it from others. We cannot convince 9 billion people on the planet to like us or understand us.

3. We can get love an understanding from ourselves, approval from ourselves. Be at peace with yourself and how Spirit sees you by becoming a better you.

A common personality trait we are dealing with around us and in the world, are manipulative, narcissistic people. I want to give some answers and tools to some commonly asked questions I was asked about how to deal with these difficult people. What they look like, how they make us feel, and what we can do right away to get in a healthier place. This podcasts takes off from the last podcast on implementing boundaries. When we learn to listen to our bodily sensations and trust our gut we can act on making good decisions and healthy boundaries with people around us.

 #narcissism #manipulation #trustyourgut #stressfree #trauma #anxiety #health

Boundaries seem like they are not an easy thing to do and at first they are not. It's uncomfortable to stick up for ourselves if we have spent our life not doing so. Once we realize all the negative side effects that come from not having boundaries we will be more motivated to have them. If we allow people to walk on us, manipulate us, abuse us, we will become anxious, angry, tense, etc. These negative side effects are how our body signals us that we need to do something different. Without boundaries we invite more and more drama and trauma into our lives. Once we implement our boundaries by speaking up and acting on them we release our anger and resentments because we aren't being hurt anymore and we are learning how to take care of ourselves. We have a choice. Then we can move into forgiveness and compassion once we have established and acted on our boundaries. #boundaries #self help #stress #trauma #awareness #healing #narcissism #manipulation #trustyourgut #stressfree #trauma #anxiety #health