SmartDrivel

Mustaches are having their moment. Previously the signature look of creepy dudes and ‘70s porn stars, the mustache is back, popular, and oh so au courant. Hipster millennials finally are shaving their beards leaving just the beauty on the upper lip, the ‘stache, in homage to the incredible heroes, artists, conquerors, movie stars, and bad asses of the past. Join Jon and Kurt in this episode as they discuss the merits and demerits of said upper lip worm. You won’t be surprised that they differ on its “coolness factor”. So wax up and take a listen. 

The lads, Jon and Kurt, have a good ol’ chinwag discussing obnoxious passengers on airplanes, crazy words like apricity, Queen Victoria’s family squabbles that played out across a global stage and, at some point, they even discuss Marie Antoinette and Twinkies. Smart Drivel at its finest.

Shakespeare wrote at least 38 plays and 154 sonnets, and the official count is 884,647 words and 118,406 lines. Within this prodigious output, he invented over 1,700 new words and countless phrases that we use every day. Jon and Kurt decide to share some of the most surprising and interesting of these words and phrases in this episode–it may not be fashionable (ding ding) or neither here nor there (ding ding), but for goodness sake (ding ding), have a listen.

Jon and Kurt have a little forum about the most amazing couples ever. Those from fiction. From wars. From the bible. From the arts. From politics. From legend. Forged in love or in greed, these couples all have a fascinating story to tell.

We’ve all been there: you are having a really good time at the party and imbibe just a wee bit too much. Enough too much that the following morning you feel like crap. So you try all sorts of things to mitigate the pain. To no avail. The hangover persists. Humankind has been searching for a solution to this for 10,000 years–ever since that first accidental beer was brewed. In this episode, join Jon and Kurt as they discuss some of the more creative, oldest, and just plain odd hangover remedies. It is almost enough to make you want to have a drink (or four).

The English language is filled with color idioms. White lies, red handed, blue moon, green with envy, paint the town red are just a few examples that Kurt and Jon dig into in this episode. Many of these terms have a literal origin that were long ago forgotten. Press play and enjoy our very own mashup of history, the dictionary, and a bag of skittles.

Celebrities always seem to have really cool names. Names that sound great when spoken and that conjure up a feeling of glamor or strength or sophistication. Interestingly, most of these names were not the names they were given at birth. These new monikers were adopted to appeal to an audience. Doesn’t Marilyn Monroe sound more beautiful than Norma Jean Baker? Isn’t John Wayne much more strong sounding than Marion Morrison? You get the idea. In this episode, Jon and Kurt have fun trying to guess the “stage name” of famous people given only their birth names and a few hints. So who was born Albert Einstein that wasn’t the famed physicist? And, certainly, we cannot forget Issur Danielovitch. 

Humans, as a species, are a very funny animal classification. Not content to buy just those products that they need for daily survival, their money burns a hole in their pocket to such a degree that they end up spending it on absolutely ridiculous things. From the Pet Rock to Dehydrated Water to the Comfort Wipe and oh so many others, it is amazing what people will go out of their way to buy. Jon and Kurt highlight just a few of these mind-scratching purchases.

In its quest to be remembered by car rental customers, Avis once proudly proclaimed, "We're #2. We Try Harder." It was a brilliant campaign that highlights the challenges of being second. No one remembers you. Kurt and Jon are both second children so they've been dealing with this challenge forever. (Some people even start a podcast to overcompensate.) So Jon and Kurt set out to make sure the silver medalists from history and pop culture get their due. Come learn about Michael Wilding, Twice a Prince, Samuel Tilden, and so many others who just missed out on immortality and why. Jon and...what's the other guy's name? The guy who's second in the Smart Drivel title? Ah, it's on the tip of my tongue. Anyway, enjoy the episode.

Kurt and Jon explore the disorienting land defined by the Urban Dictionary and learn more than they bargained for. As it turns out, Kurt is equally at home with hors d'oeuvres as well as store d'oeuvres. One is consumed in a friend's living room. The other at Costco. If you don't know what it means to be a body booker, say, "Damn, Gina," or engage in the fine art of chipmunking, then this episode is for you. All we know is that Kurt and Jon are cheugies, and you probably are too. Bye, Felicia.

There are certain entries in every category that are just perfect. They may not be the best or the greatest or the deepest or the funniest or the quintessence, but they are perfect. These entrants tick off all the boxes and stand as the perfect representaion of thier ilk. Perfect movie. Perfect cocktail. Perfect meal. You get the idea. Jon and Kurt weigh in with their thoughts…controversy abounds.

It’s happened to all of us, too many times to mention. We see something or hear of something or want to do something that seems just fantastic…until it is too late and you realize that it was actually a really bad idea. Jon and Kurt have fun discussing prime examples of regretful choices that just seemed so damn good at the time.

The boys are back at it with a third episode dedicated to fun phrases and their origins. This time, we learn where “pull out all the stops” and “put a sock in it”  and “rule of thumb” come from, among others. We also learn the provenance of “best man” and “honeymoon”. And, we learn the correct way to spell pom-poms er pom-pons.

Jon and Kurt have fun guessing famous slogans that were funny, had double meanings, or were just blatantly bad. From the disaster of the Chevy Nova in foreign markets to the hilarity of a Sega print ad to explaining the beauty that is Guinness, the two hosts share, laugh, and marvel at some of advertising's most interesting attempts at selling products.

Throughout recorded time, certain foods have been elixirs and medicinal remedies for multiple ailments. As Hipocrates famously said, “let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food.” In this episode, Jon and Kurt dig up some really cool uses for every day foods that cure ailments. So the next time you are sick or hurting, don’t run to your drugstore, listen to this episode and open your refrigerator.

Ever wonder where products got their names? Why so many with numbers–409, 57, 40, 7? On top of that, how did companies come up with their names? Was Amazon always “Amazon” right out of the gate? What was Pepsi first called? Where did the name Lego come from? All of these wonderments baffled Jon and Kurt…at first. But then they leaned into the topic and created an episode dedicated to discussing and educating on the very subject. So, grab some Orville Redenbacher popcorn and have a listen.

We have all had them…these knee buckling, mind boggling big questions that we try to make sense of. Like “why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?” or “how is it possible to have a ‘civil’ war?” or “have you ever imagined a world where there are no hypothetical situations?” Jon and Kurt ponder a whole bunch of questions like these working their minds into a pretzel of logic.

With the Surgeon General of the United States officially warning of the harmful effects social media can have on children and teens Jon and Kurt thought it was time to re-air one of their first episodes. Taking on a popular issue facing society today, Jon and Kurt attempt to lay out the pros and cons of social media while waxing poetic about the moment the first fish walked out of the ocean.

The Darwin Awards are catnip to any Smart Driveler. They “recognize individuals who have supposedly contributed to human evolution by selecting themselves out of the gene pool by dying or becoming sterilized via their own actions.” What an incredible, fertile bank of content from which to draw. Let’s be frank–these are colossally stupid people who have found the most humorous and ridiculous ways to get themselves out of procreation…and thus saving future generations from having to deal with their genetic offspring. Jon and Kurt have a lot of fun selecting a select few award winners from the past years.

Jon and Kurt have each found certain parts of the human existence that they feel are out of place, unwarranted, just plain wrong. They chalk these up to being some of the (very) few mistakes made by God. In their first episode of this topic, #41, the lads mentioned some things they found to be out of whack, like first rows in movie theaters or oceans of water we can’t drink. Well, they are at it again, this time though they seem to disagree with one another over whether some things are truly mistakes or not. Take a listen and weigh in for yourselves.

Upon a recommendation from a loyal listener, Jon and Kurt record another episode of fun facts with which to amaze, tantalize, and hypnotize your friends. They run the gamut from expanding landmarks to lacking the body odor gene to the first recorded “your Mama joke” in history. Be ready to write some of these down so you can memorize and then show off your cool, esoteric knowledge.

Jon and Kurt recently learned of a fascinating human dynamic: there are many instances where large groups of people all swear they know a fact that is indisputable. Yet they are wrong. Their "fact" is completely made up. It is a wild manifestation of being human–certainly AI wouldn’t fall prey to a social current that sweeps up many in its errant tide. In this episode, our completely human co-hosts explore many different examples of The Mandela Effect. It’s true. I swear it. I saw it myself.

Jon and Kurt had so much fun discovering the greatest April Fool’s pranks that they dove in even deeper and found more incredible hoaxes. Marketers take it as manna from heaven and have had a lot of fun ginning up interest in their products around great April Fool’s initiatives (“Left handed Whopper” anyone?) as have governments (Norway’s “free wine” stunt) and celebrities (Walt Frazier). The hosts had fun with this one as they hope you do…and make sure you don’t fall for any wooden nickels.

Jon and Kurt decided to capitalize on the fact that they recorded  this episode the day after April First and put out a topical discussion about pranks. They found historical jokes centuries old that fooled many middle agers (not someone in their 50s, but someone who lived centuries ago) and some that got the masses hook line and sinker in the 20th century. And lots in between. Give a listen and get inspired for the next April Fools Day. Maybe you will find one worth repeating (but we advise against trotting out “War of the Worlds” again).

Ever want to hang with Sam I Am and try to eat Green Eggs and Ham? Or chill with Captain Nemo as he heads 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea? Maybe you want to have tea with Emma in one of the gorgeous English manor houses or chow down some spinach with Popeye and go after Bluto? Well, Jon and Kurt thought it sounded pretty cool, so in this episode they discuss which fictional characters they would like to travel with. The options are endless and quite fun. Who would you travel with and where would you go? (Hint: maybe don’t hang out with Juliet or Romeo at night.)

Like it or not, the AI revolution is coming. Heck, it is here already. Jon and Kurt wondered how unique they were and if ChatGPT had the ability to add drivel to smart. So, for this episode, they requested ChatGPT “to create a dialogue for two hosts of a podcast called Smart Drivel where the goal is to deliver interesting facts about history, food, words, trivia, life, etc. but in a funny way. The hosts are named Kurt and Jon. Need 10 minutes of dialogue.” Listen in as Jon and Kurt read what ChatGPT generated and then discuss its merits and challenges. Judge for yourself who does it better. Humanity forever….

When Jon and Kurt were sharing befuddlement (something they often do) about the fact that a banana duct taped to a wall sold for $120,000 at auction a year ago, they decided to explore it more. In so doing, they found some bizarre items that have caused raucous bidding wars– as in people fought to pay more for them: a piece of  cake from Queen Elizabeth's and Philip's wedding, Elvis Presley’s hair, John Lennon’s toilet, half eaten French toast, etc. It certainly warranted a Smart Drivel discussion. Going once, going twice, going three times…sold.

Ah, the wonder of comforting childhood rhymes–such sweet innocent word play to amuse, soothe, and educate young children. At least that is what we all thought until Jon and Kurt did some digging, some intensive research, some literary forensic analysis. What they found is unsettling to say the least. Turns out, some of our most beloved nursery rhymes have morbid, lascivious, and/or creepy origins. Leave all your peaceful childhood memories behind, and join the boys as they dig into the true history of some iconic rhymes.

People have used their final words, before passing onto the next adventure in the sky, to truly make a statement. Funny, emotional, insulting, self-deprecating, you name it. With the chance for one final opportunity to communicate without any pushback, there have been some amazing quips and insights that have lasted through the years. Jon and Kurt take a look at some of the most endearing, satirical, honest, and interesting “last words” and share some of their favorites. “Et tu Brute?”

Jon and Kurt decide to get patriotic, historic, and caloric–ok, not caloric, but it did fit the rhyme scheme–as they share unique, surprising stories about our 46 U.S. Presidents. From the scientifically interesting (which is the only President to hold a patent) to the physically interesting (who was the shortest President) to the curiously interesting (who was the only President to kill someone in a duel) and onwards, they unearth some pretty cool facts about those who hold our highest office.

We have emerged out of a precedent-setting pandemic where all bets were off as to how we behaved,  presented ourselves, and interacted with others. Add to this dynamic that there is now a new generation in the workspace, there is new technology to harness, and there are a ton of new ways to behave. Thankfully, the fine folks at New York Magazine have developed a list of the new rules governing today’s way to act. Jon and Kurt dive into the list and discuss the merits of these new rules while also commenting on their own ability to comply with these new rules. Spoiler alert…they both continuously flout many of them such as “don’t correct someone who mispronounces a word if you get the gist.”

Our homes are veritable Swiss army knives of contraptions, inventions, and solutions. Everyday household items found in drawers, cabinets, and refrigerators can be used for solving many common issues. Jon and Kurt get in on the current “hack” game and share some great hacks to help you unstick a zipper, fill holes in walls, replace a lost earring back, pull out a splinter without needling into your skin…well, you get the idea. Pull up a listen, you will be amazed what you can do with stuff you already own.

Jon and Kurt each found some random questions they wanted to ask each other to try and establish a trivia knowledge hierarchy in the Smart Drivel organization. Of course, this being Smart Drivel, the answers are never straight-forward nor are they on topic. Test yourself versus the hosts and see what you know. Maybe you will qualify to be a guest host one of these days.

Ever get that sneaking suspicion that there is something out there to be afraid of? In other words, do you have a phobia about phobias? Well, there is a name for that: Phobophobia is a fear of being afraid. If there is a phobia about phobias, then there must be some doozies out there. Jon and Kurt spooked themselves by uncovering lots of different phobias, what they are, and what they are called. Put it this way, there truly is a phobia for everything. This episode boldly goes right into the eye of the phobia…

Jon and Kurt take a look through history at great business inventions. They apply their own filters as to what makes a great invention and bring in personal experiences in the business world to list, debate, admire, and laugh at these innovations. You will be surprised at what makes their list...

Every great movie has an iconic line that, when uttered, immediately generates a response from those in your conversation pod. “It’s all ball bearings these days.” “Play it, Sam.” “We’re not in Kansas anymore, Toto.” Jon and Kurt choose a few of the most iconic, funny, classic, and misunderstood of them all and discuss. “Badges? Badges? We don’t need any stinkin’ badges.”

In every category, there always seems to be one product, one event, one person, one object that defines the list, that comes out on the very top and is the first listed. This element is the example of the topic of discussion..it reflects, resembles, and reinforces the characteristics of the category. In this episode of Smart Drivel, Jon and Kurt discuss the quintessential  cocktail, road trip song, candy, world leader, 70s disaster movie, sunglasses, cookie...well, you get the idea. Come along for the ride and make sure your opinion is addressed and heard.

Jon and Kurt invite you to peek in on their conversation about Homophones which will hopefully pique your interest and make you think they have reached the peak of podcasting. You guessed it, you are the guest of the episode. So contemplate your navel or run off and engage in naval warfare, this discussion won't be a bore if you listen while eating some boar.

We have all been there…you are on the couch flipping channels and you come across a movie that stops you in your tracks. No matter how many times you have seen it, you HAVE to watch it again. The same is true for songs on the radio. Passed hors d'oeuvres. Fast Food restaurants. TV shows. Well, you get the idea. We all have those favorites that just suck us into their vortex. Jon and Kurt explore the topic and share their unpassables…

Ever get confused when you are watching an Auburn football game and they are referred to as the Tigers but then their fans all cheer for the War Eagles? Or want the backstory on the UC Santa Cruz Banana Slugs? Then you go down the mascot rabbit hole and try to figure out why Alabama is called the Crimson Tide yet their mascot is an Elephant? Ya. Well, so did Jon and Kurt. They take a crack at trying to explain or demystify the crazy, nonsensical world of college nicknames and mascots. Rah rah Anteaters!

The 1970s saw the advent of bell bottoms, the rise of Donny Osmond, and the proliferation of new chain restaurants across the country. The affordability of these new “casual dining” experiences coupled with some of their themes and hooks, got the American family to venture out of the home kitchen more often. Sadly, these iconic restaurants of our youth–the Hojos, the Bennigans, the Pizza & Brews, to name just a few–are now gone. Relics of the past. Jon and Kurt enjoy discussing, reminiscing, and conjuring up what it was like to patronize these places. Bring your own peanuts and sawdust…

Most folks know by now that Viagra was not originally intended to solve a sexual issue, but they’d be amazed how Lysol was first marketed. In this episode, Jon and Kurt investigate products that became accidental commercial successes in different ways than initially contemplated. Listerine was supposed to cure gonorrhea? Oh boy.

The boys were in a conversation the other day when they both started using common  phrases in a nerdy “one-upsmanship” kind of way. It started innocently enough with Jon mentioning something about being “called on the carpet” and then Kurt mentioning how excited he was for the upcoming slate of “white elephant” parties. And it ended with them thinking it would make a good episode to dig into the origin stories of phrases such as these. They are hoping you think this episode “passes with flying colors”.

Did you know that the words written on Twitter every single day would fill a book of ten million pages? Did you know that “buttload” is an actual measurement? Jon and Kurt have fun in this episode doling out seemingly ridiculous statements that are actually true. They sound faker than Kurt’s french accent, but are 100% correct.

In an episode that quickly diverted from the chosen topic--really stupid questions people ask-- and never returned to it (luckily, this is a weekly podcast so there is always another opportunity),  Kurt discusses how he can immediately spot someone not to be trusted. Jon, sometimes incredulously, tries to understand Kurt’s logic. Apparently, according to Kurt, there are three traits that, if possessed by someone, immediately tip off Kurt that the person is not to be trusted. It all makes for an intriguing window into what makes the boys tick.

What is a contronym you ask? The definition is “a word with two opposite meanings.” Huh? You mean to tell me that you can use a word, feeling good about it, and then all of a sudden that same exact word can be taken as the complete opposite? Holy cow, this is confusing. So, Jon and Kurt decide to dive into it head on and–buckle up–you need to fasten your seat belt, er, um or will you unfasten and–buckle at the knees? Damn. Well, they try to give some examples so we can spot one when we see one. Aloha. Darn, there's another one...

It happens all the time–at least to Kurt it does–there you are, sitting at a dinner regaling everyone with curious and interesting facts. Like where f.u.c.# comes from. Or the length of Twinkies half-life. Or the toilet was invented by Thomas Crapper. You know, the great stories that people love to hear. The problem is, what happens all the time is some kill joy of a person decides to tell the crowd how these facts are just not true. And then they prove it. Social fun balloon now popped. Well, Kurt and Jon in this episode aim to get all these “false fun  facts” out in the open all at once, so the others you hear at the next party will for sure have to be true.

We’ve all been there: you are having a really good time at the party and imbibe just a wee bit too much. Enough too much that the following morning you feel like crap. So you try all sorts of things to mitigate the pain. To no avail. The hangover persists. Humankind has been searching for a solution to this for 10,000 years–ever since that first accidental beer was brewed. In this episode, join Jon and Kurt as they discuss some of the more creative, oldest, and just plain odd hangover remedies. It is almost enough to make you want to have a drink (or four).