From the time we were kids through today, we are constantly receiving messages from external sources of how we're supposed to look, what we're supposed to like and who we're supposed to be. Maybe it's time to look within ourselves to examine our values of who we really want to be, and to then display those outwardly instead. We can choose our own identities and shed any labels that don't really define us.
Too often in life we fall into the trap of placing our happiness on the attainment of a specific goal, object or result. We attach our self worth to specific outcomes and if it doesn't turn out exactly that way, we allow ourselves to feel down, rather than appreciating the experience, learning from it or finding a suitable substitute. Understanding how to avoid unhealthy attachment in life can be incredibly liberating, and actually help us achieve more of what we really want.
Real forgiveness is liberating, and sometimes people have misconceptions about what it means. A great resource that has helped me is the book by Desmond Tutu called The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World. Are there things that you've held on to that could be let go through forgiveness?
Our wonderful county needs an upgrade to our two party political system. It is not an accurate representation of Americans. The us vs. them attitude isn't helping us and a lot of time, money and attention is wasted on battling each other rather than trying to move forward as a collective. An overhaul of the Electoral College and making it easier for more parties to be included in the political process would be two ways our system could be improved.
We all could benefit from more kindness in the world. The givers and receivers are both rewarded, and there is even some great scientific research to support the benefits. In short, kindness isn't just fluff.
How can you be kinder today?
Susan Cain's book "Quiet - The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking" was a revelation for me when it came out a few years ago. As a self confessed introvert, it helped me to understand more about myself as well as others, especially those closest to me.
I think it is important to help identify the situations and environments that we thrive in, and also to balance those out with other experiences as well.
September is National Recovery Month, which is now in its 30th year celebrating those in recovery and people working in the treatment and recovery fields. We're all in recovery from something at some point in our lives, and this is important to remember to have compassion when other people are struggling.
Rather than pointing out what is wrong with religions, maybe we should celebrate what is right about them and question why ours are telling people that other human beings aren't as deserving of love. Instead of criticizing beliefs, I think we can isolate the harmful actions and focus on the benefits of religious practices, of agnostics, spiritualists, atheists, and other communities and help reform acts of judgment and hate and turn them into acts of love for one another.
In Episode 2 of the Support For Guys podcast, we take a look at what to do when you feel like your back is against the wall. We talk about grit, resilience, awareness and much more. Thanks for listening!
This is the inaugural "Support for Guys" podcast by Lucas Catton. There aren't enough resources where guys can talk about things on a deeper level with more meaning and less judgment. This is an attempt to open up more conversations about living and to provide a venue for support for guys.
The first episode also includes read thing "We Are All People, A Children's Book About Tolerance," as well as some background about the book.