The Solutionists Audio Vibes

People struggle to get to know each other on first dates. They don’t know what to talk about because they don’t know what they are looking for in their life partner. They don’t know what is important for them and what it is they want to find in their partner. If you know the type of life you want, the goals you have and what kind of person you want to share those with, you will have no problem in bringing up questions related to such important questions.

If you learn and develop yourself, you’ll find many things to talk about from your own experiences and knowledge. At the least become a good listener as most people enjoy talking about themselves so just by listening your able to learn a lot about someone and which route to take with your questioning.

Why silence is golden. It takes self-control, it takes emotional intelligence and it takes inner strength. There is a reason we have two eyes, two ears and one mouth, we should look and listen more than speak. Being silent keeps you out of blame, allows you to think about what you say. More often than not, prevents regret.

It is wisdom and patience leading to better decisions, better articulation of yourself and gives you complete control of how you behave without having the need to be compelled to answer, argue and fight back unnecessarily wasting your intelligence and energy. Learn to observe and you’ll absorb more.

It never ceases to amaze me the laziness of people. People always in the depths of their hearts seek to gain something from doing nothing. I have come across people of faith who want their problems to be fixed with an instant prayer without tracking back the years of incorrect actions. I have found people want to find their life partner and do nothing to find them but hope they will miraculously fall into their laps because they are waiting for destiny or an arranged marriage by parents. I have come across people who say they want to be happy but do nothing to make that their priority and I have come across people who punish themselves with eating poorly all their life and look for a magic pill or quick medical procedure to get away with doing nothing to change their health.

I don't feel sorry for these people because they choose not to take responsibility, they choose not to understand that if this was the way of the world, we would never learn anything about consequences. Stop being lazy, stop wishful thinking and go do something that deserves an answered prayer, deserves destiny finding you the perfect partner or the miracle of health.

Being in a relationship with someone should be effortless. Even if there are little disagreements, you should not feel guilt, tense and uncomfortable to talk about your beliefs, goals and desires out of fears of scaring your other half. If this is the case, and you're embarrassed or afraid to be yourself around the person you’re with then it is a sure sign of it not going to work long-term.

You should be looking forward to being with person each day and miss them when you don’t see each other for a few days. If you’re arguing more than conversing, if you’re unhappy more than happy then sooner or later it’s going to end, as such a relationship is not sustainable.

Many of us keep looking to stay relevant, trending and up to date in our appearance, subjects we talk about and the social media content we try to put out. Fearing the chance of being forgotten and becoming a story of yesterday. We start go out of our way in trying to learn about subjects we don’t like, understand or enjoy just to stay relevant within social circles and the way the world sees us.

But, how relevant are you staying about the information of your own life? Your health, your happiness? Your friendships, networks and relationships? How often do you check up on your own life and where it’s going? We are so busy staying relevant to outside topics that our own lives become irrelevant and ignored.

People have become addicted to uppers and downers in the form of medication, caffeine, sugars, energy drinks for the start of the day and glass of wine, watching movies and other distractions to make themselves fall asleep at the end of the day.

Why not seek natural uppers and downers in healthy, natural whole foods that give you the energy and the relaxation you need without the consequences of poor health later on in life and the addictive nature of the poor foods that you take in? Isn’t it far better to be able to enjoy the food you eat but also gain long-term benefits at the same time? All it requires is a willingness to want to live better for longer than to suffer longer for short-term pleasure.

Having less friends and people to hang with doesn’t mean you’re boring or unsocial. Intelligent people become more selective of the people they spend their time with than average people. That’s because they understand the importance of time and influences on themselves. They understand the importance of keeping the company of a few high value friends that understand them, their goals and needs than having many which only act as distraction and gaining no benefit.

Currently I do not have much time to spend with the many friends like I used to when I was younger, firstly because I get more done when I'm not wasting my time socialising for the sake of socialising and second, because I have become someone with a different mindset than I had many years ago before I started my journey of finding happiness.

Success requires not quitting. Its not about not making mistakes or failing many times over but not quitting, staying down. You can quit at any time so why don’t you quit after you’ve accomplished what you set out to do? If you quit now, you'll just go back to the beginning. If you’ve watched the Rocky Balboa series you’ll learn the power of being an underdog, not staying down and reaching your dream. Sylvester Stallone says ‘It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!”

Develop your children through giving them understanding & freedom to choose by teaching them wisdom, empowerment and the benefits of making mistakes, failures. Give them the tools, skills and mindset you wish you had from a young age. Let them know its okay to make mistakes as long as they learn from them fast. Be someone they can trust and feel comfortable enough to talk to about anything so they don’t need to hide things that would be problematic later.

Don’t let their fears and shame to talk to you lead them to strangers that give them bad advice. Take responsibility for your children, don’t leave the teachers, imams, priests and rabbis to teach them life skills. Their job is to teach specific subjects, not the person they should become and the potential they have in them.

Always look for value in everything you learn, buy and gain in life. In your development and the people, you keep the company of. So many of us are ignorant of real value in knowledge, companionship and experiences. When we are given the option of free information or cheap information and expensive information, we assume the expensive one is more valuable because of its price. We are too lazy to check all the options and in doing so we become ignorant of seeking and being able to recognise real value for ourselves. Many people would not take something free because they think it must be worthless if someone is giving it away for free. However, with this mindset and belief you leave yourself open to be ripped off, taken advantage of by being sold overpriced items that give no real value.

People talk about day traders, stock brokers and shareholders in investments. Why don’t you trade in giving each other value? Hold shares in doing acts of kindness and goodness that will one day be given back in return when you need it. Be a day trader in benefiting others every day and you’ll be surprised what the universe will bring back to you. Help people with advice, sharing of knowledge, towards their goals and donate the things you don’t use to benefit others, it’s the best type of investments that comes back in the form of better health, better connections with people and a meaningful life.

Overthinking leads to procrastination. It allows doubts, assumptions and fears to enter into your mind. This then leads to freezing up and inaction or at least delayed action, which misses opportunities when at their peak. Learn accurate knowledge, gain certainty and confidence in what you want to know, teach and have success in, that way even if emotional anxiety starts to occur your certainty of knowledge will push you to acting and overcoming emotional freeze ups. This will avoid many awkward interactions in dating, give you the best of opportunities when they arise and create success in what you aim at.

The desire to change becomes real when you begin to visualise the life you could have once you’ve reached the end of your starting action. We get excited about holidays and get in a great mood before holidays, before having sex, or looking forward to a great meal or treat. We are able to change our mood and excitement just by focusing on the possibilities of what it would be like, our fantasies are enough to change our energy levels and happiness. In the same way you can learn to stimulate your energy by looking at the end of results of goals in an empowering manner. It will give you motivation and drive. Learn the steps I take regularly to achieve mini goals and long-term goals.

If you’re someone who is very picky or has high expectations of someone else. You refuse to date someone or even talk to someone unless they meet your physical idea of requirements, your financial idea of income with authority and fame, then you better hope not to be offended when they tell you their requirements and you don’t meet them. Our specific requirements of what others should have, needs to match up to the same being offered in return, otherwise you’ll be surely disappointed and offended.

Find out in this episode what it takes to attract a high value life partner.

The soul is eternal and unlimited as it comes from the source of the Creator. We are limited by our beliefs and physical body. We are spiritual beings having human experiences. Because of this spirit we are connected to unlimited source of energy and potential and it is important for people to realise this. If you don’t know the story of The famous sage and lover of the Divine, Rumi. He whirled and whirled to the point the gravity of this world could not hold him. The swirling dervishes that follow his teachings try to recreate this state for themselves. There are some Tibetan monks who are able to raise and lower their body temperature at will and dry out completely wet towels covering their bodies. There are endless stories and extraordinary stories of people doing amazing things but the world wants to continuously tell us we are nothing special and that we are incapable. Find out what you need to do to access such inner power in this episode.

For couples who are sexually active, you’ll understand this. How is it that you’re able to go to bed feeling exhausted and not in the mood to do anything for the night but then you can become sexually aroused by cuddling, caressing etc in bed, which leads to huge levels of energy that allows you to end up having sex? Where does this energy come from? How did you manage to suddenly switch your energy levels at the click of a switch? Is it not possible to do this for other areas in your life and happiness? I believe so and I have done just that continuously, when I fall ill, or something upsetting and demotivating happens. Find out how on this episode.

True knowledge by nature has the highest value in it's intrinsic form. Knowledge of truth is the most empowering of beliefs. Beneficial knowledge can take a poor person of low social status to a high status of a leader and influencer but can bring down the highest of positions those who are ignorant of it. Knowledge opens doors to the creative nature of humans. It is not something that can be taken from someone by force. It is embedded in the mind where it forms ideas and beliefs of hope and certainty or despair and uncertainty.

Without knowledge we would be no better than animals in nature and it would mean no discovery of anything that has been known up until this present moment. So, seek beneficial knowledge to lift yourself higher than what you thought possible. Find out what is beneficial knowledge and what is detrimental knowledge in this episode.

Humans are predisposed to being good and honest. If you don’t believe me, what happens when we lie, keep secrets, do something bad or against our morals and ethics? Our body gives off symptoms of unease, worries, concerns that others will find out the lies. We feel awful and restless at causing others pain and suffering.

Now, what happens when we tell truth and be honest and good? Our body feels content, happy at not having to deceive, hide things and having to cover lies with more lies. Follow the nature we were born for and you’ll find yourself much happier. Be good, be honest and be helpful.

Finding someone for intimacy straight after a breakup is bad for your health and the new partner. It is also a recipe for disaster as it’s just a mechanism to fill the void that is suddenly missing. You are not ready to move to a new relationship until you have learned to accept the last one is over, whatever circumstance it ended in.

As long as there is emotional attachment left that you carry over it will move into your new relationship that will prevent your new intimacy being formed. Many times, people end up going back to the old flame behind the backs of the new one, leading to infidelity. In this episode I provide the 4 stages you need to go through to get over and move on to new happy fulfilling relationships.

Religious fasting is not only a time to just fast externally. It is a time for internal fasting of the ego, mind, spirit and the heart. It requires you giving up internal thoughts and desires that feed the ego in all it’s negative forms and fasting from the love of worldly things. It is to disassociate with the need for worldly things and connect your heart to the source of love. Many people fasting go through most of the day fasting from food and water but all they achieve is hunger and no internal blessings. No growth in self-control, no growth in finding inner peace through disconnecting with worldly needs and no better off spiritually. If you’re not fasting internally as much as externally, it is a hollow fast.

Find out how fasting is directly linked to removing the veils of your inner self, your inner child to becoming your genuine self.

Too much details in thinking prevents enjoying the moment, creating the memory and being in the present of what is happening. It also deters overcoming problems and encourages procrastinating. Keep it simple by moving past the nitty gritty details that will not benefit you in enjoying what you’re doing. Stop beating around the bush and admire the bush in all its beauty.

Stop arguing with your spouse when you can be better loving them and creating new memories. Let the scientists and the professors waste time on the details. If we became obsessed with how a car works and focused on that, we wouldn’t be able to enjoy the ride and the simplicity of just driving.

We’ve got everything wrong way around when it comes to food and character. The standard in society and teaching should be to say ‘it doesn’t taste bad for unhealthy’ food or 'its not good to be bad'. The thinking has become altered so people perceive bad as good, are rewarded by the bending of rules and laws.

We should be making eating healthy the norm and instead of calling eating bad food ‘a treat’ we should label it ‘a punishment’. You don’t need to change the world to think like this, but you can start by changing your perception and your children to live a healthier, happier life. Find out how to break false paradigms of beliefs as I did in this episode.

Wisdom and wanting to look and sound smart are two different things. A wise person is full of experiences, good and bad that has taught them how to avoid the bad situations in the future. They essentially learn preventative measures to reduce the chances of problems and mistakes. Master chess players become masters after memorising move combinations and learning to think many steps ahead because they are already aware of the patterns and move combinations, which allows them to make quicker but wise moves. A person trying to sound and look smart by producing quick witty remarks often than not makes mistakes which needs to be covered by excuses and false information or interpretation to hide the aspect they may be wrong. Take time to understand before speaking so that you learn wisdom.

Find out why wisdom is the essential knowledge for this world on this episode!

People say don’t worry about what others think of you but what you think of yourself. That is true, you shouldn’t worry about it, BUT you should carefully consider how you come across to others and how you show your personal brand to others. If you decided to live your life in a cave in a mountain then that would be fine, if you didn’t care. However, if you intend to network, to build relationships and interact with people then your value is worth as much as how you are perceived. Therefore, you can choose to be an ass, not care and expect people to accept you as someone who is rude, obnoxious or unattractive but don’t be surprised if your love life and relationships don’t last very long.

Find out what it takes to calibrate yourself well with others to build great relationships and an approachable personality in this episode.

Stop wasting time trying to be the 2nd class version of someone else. You cannot be someone else no matter how much you try, that spot has already been taken. Instead focus on being the best version of yourself. You are unique in everything even though your makeup is the same as everyone else. Our mind, heart and spirit are uniquely different, these are the elements that make me, me and you, you.

Yes, we should learn and be inspired by others but we don’t need to replicate them, we take the best of each person we are inspired by and create ourselves into something great with out elements. Once you discover what makes you yourself, you’ll never want to be a copy of someone else. You’ll become a leader.

Contentment and gratefulness are foundations of happiness. People look everywhere and at what everyone has except what they already have. Its not until life hits them hard and they realise what they had before an accident, before they lost a loved one and before they became ill was far better than they thought. Gratefulness lets you appreciate what you have, no matter how little. Greed on the other hand stops you from appreciating everything that you have no matter how much. Learn to reduce your lifestyle down to your needs rather than what you desire and you’ll be happier. Stop the things that influence you and create desire in you to want more, TV advertising and social media marketing techniques. I stopped watching TV in 2003 but before that I started to mute adverts, my phone I have now is a cheap ZTE blade that does all the functions I need, it cost me £75. Learn the 3 secrets I used to become grateful and content with my life and myself in this episode.

Set yourself deadlines at work and in your personal life and you will see immense growth in your abilities and time management. It will push you to get better and force you to grow. It will also teach you about your limitations and increase your potential. We grow only when we are challenged. Create challenges for your life before life creates challenges for you when you’re not ready. When you create a time pressure you move with haste and urgency rather than slack and dragging on achievements. I used to work very close that I always thought I could sleep longer and get there quickly enough but somehow, I always ended up getting there late. Once I decided I needed to set off earlier, that pattern broke. Listen to this episode to find out the importance of adding time pressure on your personal life to help improve it faster than you imagined.

The heart is also known as the heart brain. It is such a piece of flesh that if it is good then the rest of you is good and if it is bad then the rest of you is corrupt. It adapts by absorbing the emotional states of its surroundings. Your emotions, character and personality are linked to your heart. So, in order to perfect your character, you must focus on removing the negative emotions being created in your heart.

In this episode I explain what is needed to help purify the internal heart and the actions that needed to be taken as taught by my spiritual master and many of those that came before him.

If you’re struggling to save money, its probably because you have nothing to save for. You have no purpose or clear goal in mind to invest your savings into. Look at the people who have a plan to buy a house or prepare for a new born, how it becomes easy for them to focus on saving and always remembering to put some money away towards that savings. Find a reason to save or create one so that it encourages saving. When you have money saved, it gives you the comfort to enjoy and pursue other areas of your life by removing the financial burdens and costs of your daily needs.

If you're looking to be in a relationship it provides the confidence to be financially strong knowing you can look after yourself and entertain your potential partner without having to rely on them to pay for you. It gives you freedom having money saved away so that you are not restricted by financial limitations. Find out the secret to gaining the discipline to save money.

The key to achieving any difficult goal is to internalise it first. You must ask yourself within, if you can handle the journey. If you are ready to give consistent time and effort, overcome the difficulties you will surely face, if you are ready to commit to seeing it through to the end. If you can accept the responsibility of the task lying in front. Internalise your goal and all that you will face and remove the fears that prevent you from taking action towards it.

Find out in this episode the internalising process I have taken to get my artwork published in successful magazines and books before starting this 10 years goal to help prevent life problems through self awareness and confidence building.

In this episode I give you tips on making money from free items online or cheap items at garage sales or discount stores. For all those young adults who have nothing but time and no personal responsibilities of rent, clothes and food. Learn to make money early on and become independent by flipping items. This is your time to make money when you have all the time to do so. Once you get tied down by jobs, family and daily expenses it will be difficult to do. Go to the many sites that offer free items, such as Gumtree in UK and Craigslist in USA. Get hold of items that are given away free that you know you can sell on ebay or amazon and make money. Listen to the episode to get my super tip on boosting the value of the free item to sell for higher profits.

Everyone wants a good partner, an ideal spouse. If you want a good partner, then you must learn to be a good partner so you recognise the qualities of one. Relationships are built on being able to support each other to grow. When you become someone that you would look for it is easier to find the good ones amongst others. Just like a job interview, if they fail to meet your requirements and can’t put their words to their actions, let them go. Learn to know your responsibility, purpose and what is required from you to have a lasting relationship and you’ll have the checklist for a happy one to keep track of.

How often do you completely relax? If you’re listening to this episode, relax your shoulders, drop your body weight, become aware of your breathing and relax it and finally relax your face and focus. You should be able to feel a completely different feeling than when you first focused on the episode. Learn to focus on yourself more often, at times of sitting, eating, being with your partner and even lying in bed for sleeping.

So many people can’t relax in bed and wonder why they have such bad sleep, they cannot clear their minds and their heavy hearts. That leads to heaviness of the body and tension everywhere. Imagine having to hold a dumbbell on with both hands throughout your day and then have a weight on your chest when you’re trying to sleep. It surely cannot be comfortable.

The words we use to describe our events, situations and problems have significant impact on the size of the problem and issue we make out.  A scratch can become a huge exaggeration for someone who thinks they’ll bleed out. A person seeing blood and feeling faint and nauseous has linked it to mean something very bad and disgusting and so they focus on what it could mean. Using terms like ‘cheater’ coward and weak in wrong context can have huge impact on starting off with a blame mindset rather than a solution mindset with accountability. Learn why it's so important for your relationship with yourself and others to create correct meaning and language.

Why do people fall out of love? What changes in the relationship since the beginning that the needs are no longer met? These are fundamental questions people are asking to understand why relationships are breaking apart. Solutions are rarely about the blame game. It's more about understanding and communicating. What I have discovered are two key reasons why people fall out of love and both are related to growth. In this episode I discuss both of the reasons in detail and why it occurs to help you prevent it happening in your relationships. Don't miss out!

Criticism is loved by those that want to improve. If you are not ready to take criticism you are not ready to learn. Nobody created anything perfect the first time, it was through self-criticism and of others that allowed it to improve until the best end result was created. As an artist it is the criticism of better artists and professionals in the industry that will push you to grow and see what you’ve done from a new perspective. Find out how to take criticism and the types of people to take it from to empower your days.

Learn how the little things make big things happen. Whatever it is you set out to do. Create a plan that will allow you to be consistent. Give yourself enough time frame to achieve it and work on it a little each day when you struggle with discipline and work on it more when you feel excited. You’d be surprised the impact of doing a little each day towards your goal. Before you know it, you would have hit the target you aimed for and many times you’d have surpassed your aim. Check out the episode to understand how to set realistic time perspectives for your life to avoid frustration, jealousy and envy.

Computer games are so addictive and successful because of the feeling of being able to regenerate and start again over and over until you get it right. You forget that everyday is a start over for each one of us in real life. Whether its problems, past mistakes or future successes, our mistakes and problems make us grow just as they make you up skill in the computer games. The continuous tries and start over allows you to become better at handling the enemies and tasks you are set out to accomplish. Why not apply this to solving the mysteries and happiness of your real life? Find out what it takes to have an amazing day everyday in this episode.

Living your life with the expectations of others will always disappoint. Instead live for your own expectations. It is far easier to change yourself than change someone else. Social media for many has exposed us to our current negative states by creating a private door to comparing ourselves to the rest of the world. Find out what it takes to prevent resentment building up in his episode.

Intention is the key to removing false meanings and perception within your relationships. Clarify them, stop assuming and associating your current and future interactions based on past experiences. Your past experiences of past people should not form the foundation for your new connections and relationships. As they will be biased, unjustified and based on inaccurate information. Learn what you must do on this episode.

People complain about not having enough time to do this and that. They make excuses as to why they can't achieve their goals and dreams due to lack of time, knowledge, skills and resources. What if you had the time and it's always been there. Can you learn to recognize the available time or are you be caught up in the habits of the masses and mindset of the poor so much that you don't realize it?

Check out where that available time is and what you are willing to do to use it wisely on this episode.

People struggle to know what they will be doing in 5-10 years’ time and many have no idea what they want. If you look at the people you surround yourself with and the daily routines and habits you have, it isn’t difficult to figure out that what you are today will not change in 5 years unless you decide to grow at every turn, be creative in your approach and have a long-term goal with a plan. Find out the 2 key secrets that can change that outcome for you in this episode.