Mind the Gap. Teens Talk We Listen

Our resident teens wanted to discuss a hot topic: curfews.  

• What is a fair curfew?  
• Why do our parents sometimes ask us to come home earlier?  
• Have you sat down to have a conversation with your parents about your curfew or have you always assumed your curfew is a certain time
• What is the science and connection between staying up late and the decisions we make?

Jeremy explains some of the reasons that go into a parents decision making process when determining a curfew.  Including how our brain works when we are tired, who we are with, and what we are doin.  

Above all communication and respect is going to help guide the conversation in a way both parents and teens can be satisfied.

We talk a lot on the show about minding the gap in communication between you and your teen, but the truth is that our time with our teenagers will be easier if we start when they are younger.  On this episode we have our pre-teens Alyssa (12), Remi (10) and Deacon (10) talk to us about communication, expressing their emotions and sharing hard things.

Listen to find out more about asking open ended questions, naming feelings, and using play time to receive insight on what's going on deeper.

Consequences can be hard to navigate as a parent of teens, whether you are deciding what is an appropriate consequence for your teen or you're worried how they will react.  Sometimes setting a consequence feels like a punishment to us as the parent as we then have to deal with the outcome, but overtime setting boundaries and consequences will teach your teen valuable lessons to be successful in life.   If you are looking for additional resources how to discipline to match the behavior, we love the book Parenting Teens With Love and Logic by Foster Cline M.D. and Jim Fay.  In the book the idea of natural consequences is discussed often.  A natural consequence is simply what naturally occurs as an outcome from the behavior.  Sometimes natural consequences are enough for a teen to learn a lesson, but sometimes a further consequence by the parent needs to be set to help them learn and grow.  

Listen and let us know your thoughts on consequences.

@mindthegap.welisten

During this pandemic it may have seemed more obvious than ever that you have different things in common with your teens/kids.  How can you find ways to connect with them when they are just not interested in the things you love?  How can you find a way to be interested in things that you have no interest in order to connect with them?  Listen as Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Jeremy Leavitt, Sherry Anderson, her son Luke and niece Clara discuss this topic in this hilarious episode.  

Round table discussion with 4 teens, Austin, Callin, Clara, and Viv with host Sherry Anderson and Marriage and Family Therapist Jeremy Leavitt. Listen as they discuss what they learned from watching The Social Dilemma and how Social Media is affecting and even controlling how we use our phones.  We share practices and habits we can implement to not feel like our phones and checking social media is having a strong hold on our lives.

You can view the documentary The Social Dilemma on Netflix - "This documentary-drama hybrid explores the dangerous human impact of social networking, with tech experts sounding the alarm on their own creations"

If you would like us to discuss a certain topic please email us at: mindthegap.welisten@gmail.com

Back to school this year looks very different for many kids.  Some may be going back to a physical building with masks while others are logging in on a computer.  How do we safeguard our kids while online?  What to do if they see pornography? How to handle all the extra screen time?  Listen as we discuss these questions with Jeremy Leavitt LMFT, Sherry, Austin, and Luke Anderson.

Today we discuss the topic of modesty.  In our culture modesty is something that is talked about heavily, mainly with our young and teenage girls.  How do we talk about modesty in a way that helps girls feel confident in who they are?  What is modesty, exactly?  Can it be determined with a ruler?  Or is it something much more?  

Jeremy Leavitt LMFT along with his wife Vanessa discuss this topic with Sherry.

We would love to hear your perspective.  What is modesty to you?  How do you discuss modesty with your teens?

While maintaining social distancing Sherry, Jeremy and Austin discuss empathy and compassion.  What is empathy?  How do we cultivate empathy in teens?  How is what we are experiencing now with Covid-19 a good opportunity to help teens learn empathy and compassion for others?

Thank you for listening every week!  We are so grateful for you and the feedback we have received.   If you have any questions you would like us to address on the show you can email us at mindthegap.welisten@gmail.com.  We would love to hear from you!

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We are doing a short series of interviews with teens around the world and how they are doing during COVID-19 pandemic.  Listen as Sherry talks with Sharese and her teen daughter Emma, a senior from Ohio, as they give us their tips on staying connected with others and being creative with the extra time.

You can follow us on Instagram for more content and inspiration on closing the gap with your teen @mindthegap.welisten and Facebook:  Mind the Gap.  Teens Talk We Listen.

We are doing a short series of interviews with teens around the world and how they are doing during COVID-19 pandemic.  Listen as Sherry talks with Naima and her teen daughter May from France as they give us insight on how things are for families in France.

You can follow us on instagram for more content and inspiration on closing the gap with your teen @mindthegap.welisten and facebook:  Mind the Gap.  Teens Talk We Listen.

We are doing a short series of interviews with teens around the world and how they are doing during COVID-19 pandemic.  Listen as Sherry talks with Nicole and her teen son Cooper from Millcreek, UT as they give us their tips on staying connected with others and being creative with the extra time.

You can follow us on instagram for more content and inspiration on closing the gap with your teen @mindthegap.welisten and facebook:  Mind the Gap.  Teens Talk We Listen.

Two weeks ago we posted on our social media pages a question:  Do you think teens should be forced to say yes when asked to dance in relation to a recent article about a school in Utah.  We were surprised by the responses we received and wanted to discuss on the podcast why we believe it's important to allow teens to make a choice that will help them feel safe.  

If you would like to see that post and some of the discussions are followers had regarding the topic you can follow us on facebook and instagram: @mindthegap.welisten

This week Sherry and Jeremy talk with Austin about how the Corona virus is affecting us globally, locally and right in Austin's own world.  Listen for tips on how to help your teens, as well as younger kids, how to handle these world events that seem very surreal, scary and can disrupt the regular routines that they are accustom to.  We discuss and explain the concept "who knows what is good and what is bad" and how to stay positive and understand that through all things, life is teaching us lessons.

Clara and Austin are back talking about dating, but this time addressing boundaries in relationships.  Jeremy discusses what a healthy relationship looks like and signs that a relationship could be problematic.  

Follow us on instagram @mindthegap.welisten and facebook: Mind The Gap-Teens Talk, We Listen

If you have questions for us you would like us to answer, you may email us at: mindthegap.welisten@gmail.com

This tool box bonus episode is a follow up episode 4:  The Problem with porn and drugs in teens.  Jeremy lays out how porn affects the brain and relationships.  Great conversation to share with your teens to let them know the "why".

A frank and honest discussion about the dangers of porn and drugs in teens.  What are the signs that there could be a possible problem?  How do we help them not make cell phones and pornography become a problem in their life?  

How to get your parents to say "yes!"  You've heard of "parenting hacks"  well this one is a hack for teens.  How to get the "yes" when you want to hang out with friends.

We discuss how to encourage our kids without pressuring them or causing undue burdens on them. What is the difference between striving to do our best versus unhealthy perfectionism?  How do we avoid transferring our own shame of being "less than" by the expectations put on our teenagers?  Expectation vs Growth Mindset.

Why do teens want to sleep all day?!  Sleep is needed and essential to a teenagers growing and developing brain and body.  How screens are affecting our sleep and what to do about it.

What defines a teens true self worth?  Hint:  It's not how many free throws you made or even your GPA.  Jeremy and Sherry talk with Austin about what things truly define him.  Listen to find out what advice the guitar player of the Killers, Ted Sablay, gave Austin during a guitar lesson.

In this very first Tool Box episode we give you tools as a parent to know how to help your child make their own choices and feel the consequences.  Good or Bad.  In this follow up from our first episode "Choices", Jeremy explains more about the Love and Logic approach to parenting and using consequences.  Look out for these Tool Box episodes that will give parents and teens both tools they need to bridge the communication gap.

We are excited to launch a new podcast for parents AND teenagers. We wanted to create a place where teens can be heard and a place for parents to learn skills on how to communicate with their teenagers. Follow our journey as we tackle some difficult topics and have fun along the way. We get to learn from Austin, a 17 year old high school student and how he views life. Jeremy teaches us some valuable tools and skills to build our relationship. And me, well, I have 5 kids and need all the help I can get. I will post the launch date and where to find us soon.