Skip to main content
Moms and Martinis

Moms and Martinis

By Kira

Moms and Martinis welcomes you into the kitchen table talk I share with my friends. We discuss our past and how it has shaped us into who we are today. How life impacts us mentally, physically, spiritually, and financially. Most importantly, how do we create a legacy by building a pipeline of future leaders.
Available on
Apple Podcasts Logo
Google Podcasts Logo
Overcast Logo
Pocket Casts Logo
RadioPublic Logo
Spotify Logo
Currently playing episode

Kira, On Purpose

Moms and Martinis Jan 20, 2023

Reverse Bucket List
Mar 23, 202351:60
License to Love
Feb 17, 202301:48:05
Take Care Of Me
Jan 20, 202301:25:23
Setting the Table - Part 2
Jan 20, 202301:29:37
Setting the Table - Part 1

Setting the Table - Part 1

In this week's episode of Moms and Martinis, I have special guests, Kaci, Kay Kay, and Mista Calhoun on to talk about what they each bring to the table in a relationship. Each reveals the baggage they have and discuss whether or not that prohibits them from have a healthy and successful relationship.
Where to find my dope as friends on Instagram:
Kaci @ohthatskaci
KayKay @iamkaykayatl
Mista Calhoun @digitaldaronpodcast
Daron @digitaldaronpodcast

What to stay connected, find everything you need here.
Jan 20, 202301:30:49
My Mind Is Playing Tricks On Me
Jan 20, 202301:00:08
Co-Parenting With a Twist

Co-Parenting With a Twist

In this week’s episode I have a conversation with Ashley, my oldest daughter’s bonus mom and my forever friend. We discuss how we met our children’s father, domestic violence shared with him, how she felt dating a guy with a child, why we both left him, and how we were able to remain close after he left the picture and the child became an adult. We also discuss how it came to be that our ex managed to take my daughter without me knowing and how I managed to get her back with Ashley’s help. This week is yet another inside look into my life and the past experiences that have groomed me into who I am today.
Jan 20, 202301:46:56
The Father Effect
Jan 20, 202357:10
Willful Submission

Willful Submission

In this week's episode, I am joined by Mista Calhoun of the Digital Daron podcast. We discuss submission, headship, why most women are not submissive, how feminism has ruined order within the home, consent, and women doing what they are told. I also talk about my desire to fully submit to a head of household, and how my history of domestic violence has impact my willingness to do so. We also discuss the day I wore the infamous leggings out of the house to the store, despite him asking me not too!
Mista Calhoun also gives us a crash course in Domestic Discipline and how it adds structure in a relationship. Is this the Christian way? We discuss the four D's of domestic discipline: dishonesty, disobedience, dangerous (behavior), and disrespect. How punishment is administered if the woman breaks the rules, including spanking, sitting in the corner, restricting electronic devices. Take some notes as we learn a few new terms: Domestic discipline of often abbreviated as DD. There is also CDD for Christian Domestic Discipline. Other terms include HOH, or head of household (the dominant man), and TiH, or taken in hand (the submissive woman).
Jan 20, 202301:14:17
Apology Languages

Apology Languages

Most people are familiar with five love languages: receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, and physical touch. These patterns of behavior are developed over time and determine what we understand as love.
In this week's episode, I am joined by Coach T to discuss the five apology languages and answer some tough questions to determine if we are good at apologizing.

Jan 20, 202301:43:26
BDSM 101 with Autumn the Aries
Jan 20, 202301:30:48
Black and Abroad
Jan 20, 202301:21:05
Get It with Coach Lisa
Jan 20, 202301:05:41
It's Not You, It's Me
Jan 20, 202301:32:05
Kira, On Purpose

Kira, On Purpose

Friend pour a drink, we need to talk. In the season three premier, Kira takes to the microphone solo to talk about living a purpose filled life and the impact of being a change agent. With a mind soundtrack of Knuckle If You Buck, Kira explains why she is a coffee bean; and how being an empathic bipolar is a large weight to carry. She discuss the importance of self acceptance and being honest with yourself. Kira express the importance of being an example for her children and the importance of creating a positive experience with the people you encounter. She explains why autumn is her favorite season and the importance of shedding old things.
Season three will teach you how to mind your business, evaluate balance in your life, alopecia, incarcerations, the lose of a child, abuse, LGBTQIA, minimizing childhood traumas, love, dating, sex, and intimacy.
If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis, please contact:
National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI)
1-800-950-NAMI, or text NAMI to 741741.
National Suicide Prevention Hotline
1-800-273-8255
Jan 20, 202301:11:47
Abused But Not Broken with Devon Croom

Abused But Not Broken with Devon Croom

In this week’s episode, Kira is joined by Devon Croom, inspirational author, career and marriage coach, and executive technology leader. Daughter of an alcoholic, teenage mother, domestic violence survivor, and having recovered from COVID-19, Devon discussed why her faith has helped live a meaningful, purpose-filled life. They discuss why mental health is essential and explained the importance of breaking the stigma of therapy.
Devon shared how trauma connected her to her ex-husband, who later demonstrated verbal and physical abuse that started when she was seven months pregnant. After several attempts to sustain the marriage, at 23 years old, she found herself as a divorced single parent of three children. With the courage to change the narrative, Devon moved out on her own determined to create a better life for herself and her children.
They discuss the beauty of learning and growing through life’s challenges and releasing the hurt and shame of past trauma to a wholehearted life.
Devon explains the importance of not rushing love and why she made her husband wait over eight years before marrying. Connected by their love of traveling, she explains why it was important to have a relationship founded on a strong friendship. Explaining to her now-husband, "You can't do me like God do me", Devon established the framework of her forever marriage and why she knows her husband is her Boaz.

Also, Devon shares her story of how she and her husband contracted and survived COVID-19. Devon tested positive and was diagnosed with pneumonia in one lung. Then after three weeks on a ventilator in a coma, pneumonia in both lungs, and sixty pounds lighter, her husband, Darryl, has made a speedy recovery and can now dance with her again. Devon shares how much of April remains a blur due to the extreme trauma. With seven members that tested positive for COVID and four who went into the hospital. Devon explains the challenging moment of sharing with her husband that his father and uncle had passed from the virus while he was in the coma.

Follow on IG: @coachdevoncroom

To learn more about Devon’s career readiness and marriage table talks, head over to
www.devoncroom.com.

Abused But Not Broken, available on Amazon
To Purchase: www.amazon.com/dp/B089LYGZHK/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_V.bOFbZFDDY47
Jan 20, 202301:04:40
Niiya: Her Truth, Her Story

Niiya: Her Truth, Her Story

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four, from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and go new places; all while becoming a better person and mother, and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week's episode, Kira, is joined at the kitchen table with Niiya Grant, as she shares her experience as a triple minority - being black, a woman, and trans. Niiya shares how therapy has allowed her to come into the fullest of who she is as a woman and enabled her to be a better advocate for the trans community. Niiya provides an insightful and educational overview of what it means to be transgender, how a person knows they are transgender, and the differences between sexual orientation and gender identity. Niiya also provides advice to parents on how best to support a child/ren who come out to them.
Resources:
The National Center for Transgender Equality
Support Our Sponsor:
It's never been easier to record, publish, and distribute a podcast. Try Anchor, the easiest way to make a podcast. Everything you need, 100% free. Go to
anchor.fm to learn more.
Where to Find Niiya: Instagram: @jesuisniilee
Stay Connected: Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you are have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:20:37
I Love Hate My Hair with Tamara Harvey

I Love Hate My Hair with Tamara Harvey

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four, from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and go new places; all while becoming a better person and mother, and keeping her mental health in check.  In this week’s episode, Kira, is joined at the kitchen table with author Tamara N. Harvey, as she shares her journey with alopecia. Tammy, as she is affectionately called, is a Baltimore native, wife and mother of twins, a 30 year government employee, part-time college student, and author of I Love Hate My Hair. They discuss the three different types of alopecia; alopecia aerata, alopecia totalis, and alopecia universalis. Tamara shares her documented journey dating back to 1998, sharing the different types of protective styling, how she revealed her hair loss while dating, losing her eyebrows, and the annoyance of unsolicited advice. Tammy provides tips to stylists and barbers who have clients suffering from hair loss. Friend at the table, Lois, shared her story with alopecia aerata. As her hair loss progressed, she decided to visit John Hopkins to undergo an extensive examine. After nearly fainting, she made the decision to take a holistic approach after her mother shared a magazine article of a doctor, whose wife was experience similar hair loss. Now with the hair on head fully grown back, Louis shares how she has loss all of her body hair and her acceptance of living with hair loss. Also joined at the table is Trenita shared when she begin noticing her hair loss over 20 years ago. With both parents experiencing hair loss, Trenita shares how genetics and chemical damage lead her to the decision to take Rogain, topical treatment, prescribed medication, biotin, and receive injection shots to slow the hair loss. Kira shares how her disconnect with her hair has impacted the bonding process that most mothers share with their daughters. In transparency, Kira shares that she knows this disconnect impacts her daughter’s self esteem. She asks for advice on how to console her 10 year old on accepting her hair. Friends at the kitchen table are Estella Jackson (mom), Lois Brinkley (aunt), Trenita Purdie (friend), and Joie Hill (friend). Resources: Autumn Jade Salon, Kimmie https://www.autumnjadesalon.com/ National Alopecia Areata Foundation https://www.naaf.org/ Support Our Sponsor: It's never been easier to record, publish, and distribute a podcast. Try Anchor, the easiest way to make a podcast. Everything you need, 100% free. Go to https://anchor.fm to learn more. Where to Find Tamara: Instagram: @booksbytamaraharvey Facebook @booksbytamaraharvey Twitter @Tscorp1111 Website: https://www.amazon.com/Tamara-N.-Harvey/e/B07N7QPNV7 Books by Tamara N. Harvey are available on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/Tamara-N-Harvey/e/B07N7QPNV7?ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1&qid=1606793004&sr=8-1 I Love Hate My Hair My-Ku I’ll Have a Martini Please Stay Connected: Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you are have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com. The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast Make sure to follow us on social media: Twitter: @momsandmartinis Facebook: @momsandmartinis Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:20:36
For Better or Worse with Nyesha & Rickey

For Better or Worse with Nyesha & Rickey

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four, from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and go new places; all while becoming a better person and mother, and keeping her mental health in check. In this week’s episode, Kira is joined at the table with Nyesha and Rickey to discuss the importance of sustaining a healthy thriving marriage. The couple shared their story of how they met, are raising children in a blended family, and how to keep the relationship going. Having dated for six years, the couple shared how they grew together and were spiritually married before having the ceremony and legalizing the union. Nyesha cautions listeners about sharing the intimate details of their relationship with friends because while you’ll forgive your significant other, they’ll hold on to moments you all have moved past. Rickey and Nyesha discuss raising a blended family and how that dynamic works for their family. As beautiful as it is, it’s challenging; however, it has matured them as adults and parents. They also discussed bringing non-biological children in from previous marriage into your forever love. Nyesha and Rickey shared how they support each as a couple, and as individuals. Stressing the importance of being friends throughout the relationship and sharing the weight of responsibilities that come along with building a legacy. They discussed gender roles, communication, being attentive to your partner, and being intentional in having tough conversations.  Support Our Sponsor: It's never been easier to record, publish, and distribute a podcast. Try Anchor, the easiest way to make a podcast. Everything you need, 100% free. Go to https://anchor.fm to learn more. Where to Find Nyesha & Rickey: Instagram: Nyesha @gracefully_controlled Rickey @kingiamme More about Profile Scrub: www.profilescrub.com Stay Connected: Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you are have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com. The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast Make sure to follow us on social media: Twitter: @momsandmartinis Facebook: @momsandmartinis Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:13:41
Mind Your Business with Dem Chakras

Mind Your Business with Dem Chakras

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four, from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and go new places; all while becoming a better person and mother, and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week’s episode, Kira is joined at the table with Christian of Dem Chakras podcast to discuss the art of minding your business. Using the analogy of a traffic light, they discuss when to stop, when to slow down, and when to move full speed ahead. They also defined self-care and implementing healthy boundaries. Christian shares how she began her spiritual path and the shadow work she completed to realign herself when you felt lost. Christian challenges us all to examine if we truly like ourselves, identify what makes us uncomfortable, define our healthy boundaries, and examine if we are on brand. They also discuss the importance of mentors, gathering feedback, the importance of the root chakra, why it stabilizes everything you do, and why you should NOT gift people your business.
Here are a few questions to ponder:
What are the signs that you need to stop to recalibrate to become balanced and realigned?
When should you slow down to take inventory of things in your life to determine what's next?
How can one tell if they are in full alignment and living purposefully?

Support Our Sponsor:
It's never been easier to record, publish, and distribute a podcast. Try Anchor, the easiest way to make a podcast. Everything you need, 100% free. Go to
anchor.fm to learn more.
Where to Find Dem Chakras:
Instagram:
@demchakras
@demchakrasllc
www.flow.page.com/demchakras/
www.demchakras.com
You can find Dem Chakras Podcast is available on all listening platforms.
Stay Connected:
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you are have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:44:44
Intimacy After Sexual Trauma with Katrina

Intimacy After Sexual Trauma with Katrina

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four, from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and go new places; all while becoming a better person and mother, and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week's episode, Kira is joined at the table with Katrina to discuss intimacy after experiencing sexual trauma. They discussed the psychological impacts of sexual trauma and how it caused them to push away from significant others, how they felt their body was not theirs, the distorting views of people and over-sexualizing intent, the impacts of rehearsing the abuse during intimacy and exhibiting anxiety symptoms, and how did they process the sexual trauma? They also discussed dating and relationship. They expressed how their trauma has impacted their willingness to explore new ways to be sexually intimate, the development of unhealthy sexual habits at a young age, reliving the traumatic experience if their significant other is forceful and how certain actions may stare them. Also, the ladies discussed how these experiences has impacted their mother-child relationship, if they found themselves being overly attached to your children, and provided advice to parents with a child that has experienced sexual trauma.
Support Our Sponsor:
It's never been easier to record, publish, and distribute a podcast. Try Anchor, the easiest way to make a podcast. Everything you need, 100% free. Go to
anchor.fm to learn more.
Stay Connected:
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you are have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:10:49
Growing Up With Mom featuring D. Murph

Growing Up With Mom featuring D. Murph

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four, from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and go new places; all while becoming a better person and mother, and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week’s episode, Kira is joined at the table with Derrick Murphy, affectionately known as D. Murph, to discuss being raised by a teenage mother. Born to a young, 16 year old mother in Gary, Indiana, who dropped out of school for two years to care for him as he suffered crippling asthma for the first eight months of his life. He shared how his mother sacrificed a lot to help shape him and why introducing him to basketball made him a better man. D. Murph explained why some sons take on the role of being “the man of the house”.
Kira and Murphy discussed the differences between being a single mother versus a single parent and why a mother does not replace the role of an absent father. Murph explains how and why nurturing your son makes him a better man and better communicator.
Become a Monthly Supporter:
If Moms and Martinis is a part of your day or week, and you love what we’re doing, please subscribe as a monthly listener. I’ve set up a link where you can quickly and easily support the show. The whole thing will take 60 seconds. Choose the pricing tier you wish to use. Current options are $0.99, $4.99, or $9.99. All of these will renew monthly automatically. Please visit
anchor.fm/momsandmartinis/support and support us, any way you can, today.
Support Our Sponsor:
It's never been easier to record, publish, and distribute a podcast. Try Anchor, the easiest way to make a podcast. Everything you need, 100% free. Go to anchor.fm to learn more.
Where to find D. Murph:
Instagram: @ItsDMurph
Instagram: @Flagrant2pod_
Instagram: @WhyNotSports_
Website: dmurphspeaks.wordpress.com/
Stay Connected:
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you are have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:16:19
Covert Emotional Abuse with Annette Oltmans, The M3ND Project

Covert Emotional Abuse with Annette Oltmans, The M3ND Project

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between Kira and her friends. Kira, mom of four from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and goes new places, all while becoming a better person and mother and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week’s episode, Kira is joined at the table with Annette Oltmans, Founder, Chairman of the Board of Directors, The M3ND Project. The M3ND Project seeks to educate, equip, and restore all those things impacted by Original and Double Abuse®. In this episode, Annette provides the history and mission of the organization and her history of abuse. Together they discuss stigmas of male abuse and take a deep dive into double and covert emotional abuse. Annette defines what covert emotional abuse is, how to identify behaviors associated with this type of abuse, what double abuse is, and how to stop it.
Kira and Annette also share tips to supporters of abuse victims and survivors when they are in the relationship and transitioning out of the relationship. Annette provides a high-level overview of the Healing Model of Compassion and the Accountability Model of Courage.
Support Our Sponsor:
It's never been easier to record, publish, and distribute a podcast. Try Anchor, the easiest way to make a podcast—everything you need, 100% free. Go to
anchor.fm to learn more.
Where to find more information about The M3ND Project:
Instagram: @themendproject
Twitter: @mend_project
Facebook: @themendproject
Website: www.themendproject.com
Email: info@themendproject.com
Become a Monthly Supporter:
If Moms and Martinis is a part of your day or week, and you love what we’re doing, please subscribe as a monthly listener. I’ve set up a link where you can quickly and easily support the show. The whole thing will take 60 seconds. Choose the pricing tier you wish to use. Current options are $0.99, $4.99, or $9.99. All of these will renew monthly automatically. Please visit anchor.fm/momsandmartinis/support and support us any way you can today.
Stay Connected:
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:19:14
Access Denied with Shereece

Access Denied with Shereece

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life as she tries new things and goes to new places, all while becoming a better person and mother and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week’s episode, Kira is joined at the table with Shereece to discuss being a strong friend. Shereece explains why the importance of normalizing courting your friends and setting clear expectations about what you are looking for in a friendship and from that person. They also discussed why asking your friends for permission to dump before unloading new information on them emotionally. How do you want your friends to show up for you?
Kira outlines the four levels as adapted from Waiting and Dating by Dr. Myles Monroe.

acquaintances: occasional contact with very general knowledge of each other; talk about general topics that won’t cause the person to feel threatened or that you are trying to pry; the lowest level of friendship
Casual friends: have common interests, activities, and concerns; meet more frequently than acquaintances and talk about common interests; praise and encourage each other in achievements and accomplishments; not serious about each other emotionally.
Close friends: mutual interests and life goals, handiwork mutually toward reaching those goals; often share similar values, ideals, and worldviews; “Most people never get this far in their relationships, and others jump straight from acquaintances to “intimate” because they do not know how to go through the friendship-building process.
Intimate friends: committed to the development of each others character; requires the freedom to be vulnerable, as well as correct each other; mutual responsibility of open honesty with discretion; committed to working with each other toward becoming better people

Become a Monthly Supporter:
If Moms and Martinis is a part of your day or week, and you love what we’re doing, please subscribe as a monthly listener. I’ve set up a link where you can quickly and easily support the show. The whole thing will take 60 seconds. Choose the pricing tier you wish to use. Current options are $0.99, $4.99, or $9.99. All of these will renew monthly automatically. Please visit
anchor.fm/momsandmartinis/support and support us any way you can today.
Stay Connected:
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:41:20
Failing Upwards with Zee

Failing Upwards with Zee

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four, from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and go new places; all while becoming a better person and mother, and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week’s episode, Kira is joined at the table for some back porch pimping with Zee, owner of Black Taggs. Originally from North Carolina, but adopted as a Grady baby, this well known photographer and videographer is a force to be reckoned with. As a serial entrepreneur, he owns several businesses including The Vintage Game, offering veteran assistance ranging from mental health resources, home care, companionship and more. He also owns Cookie, Cakes, and Whipped Cream, providing you with all of your shea butter, sugar scrubs, and linen spray needs for both men and women.
Zee and I discussed some of the challenges of being the owner of multiple endeavors and why having competent, capable, and empowered business partners are the key to his success. He shares. how he consults aspiring entrepreneurs make their dreams a reality. We also talked about how him becoming a father made him a better businessman. Zee gets emotional as he talks about growing up in a juke joint with his grandmother and getting his hustle from. her. He takes a trip down memory lane recalling memories of his father and how he wishes he would have made amends with him before passing. We celebrate his son who graduated with two degrees in the middle of COVID despite the difficulties of raising a black male in today's climate.

Become a Monthly Supporter:
If Moms and Martinis is a part of your day or week, and you love what we’re doing, please subscribe as a monthly listener. I’ve set up a link where you can quickly and easily support the show. The whole thing will take 60 seconds. Choose the pricing tier you wish to use. Current options are $0.99, $4.99, or $9.99. All of these will renew monthly automatically. Please visit
anchor.fm/momsandmartinis/support and support us, any way you can, today.

Stay Connected:
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you are have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod

More about the guest:
Facebook: @zillablakktaggs
Instagram: @zilla6lakk
Website: www.zillablakk.com
Jan 20, 202301:11:16
Words from a Grieving Mother with Tamica

Words from a Grieving Mother with Tamica

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four, from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and go new places; all while becoming a better person and mother, and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week’s episode, Kira is joined at the table with Tamica to discuss grieving the loss of a child. Tamica shares a bit about her childhood and how those life events impacted her. She tells about her abuse as a teenage mother, the relationship with her mother, and the relationship with her children.
Also during the conversation, Tamica recalls the moments before and after her six-year old son was hit and killed by a car when crossing a busy highway in Atlanta. Kira, Tamica's aunt, recants her memory of the events and the impact it had on her, and the family. Throughout the conversation share the different methods Tamica has used to cope with the grief and how she manages her emotions. She shares what good and bad days look like, what has been most difficult, and what has been surprisingly easy.
Tamica shares a little about her oldest son who is currently service a 20 years prison sentence and if she feel as though she loss her sons. Lastly, the pair discuss the challenges of raising black sons, what makes them proud to be mothers, and give advice to mother raising sons in less than ideal situations.
Stay Connected:
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you are have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at
momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod
Jan 20, 202301:40:08
Conscious Dating with PM Kester

Conscious Dating with PM Kester

The Moms and Martinis podcast is a biweekly listen into the kitchen table talk between the host, Kira, and her friends. Kira, mom of four from Atlanta, Georgia, invites you to witness candid moments in her life, as she tries new things and goes new places, all while becoming a better person and mother and keeping her mental health in check.
In this week’s episode, Kira is joined at the table with PM Kester, How To Take a Break Podcast, to discuss dating consciously. During their conversation, PM Kester shared about her marriage, divorce, and dating experience. In addition, she shared how therapy and extensive journey helped her and helped frame her journaling workbook.
Together, Kira and PM Kester reviewed the Conscious Dating - Red Flag Checklist and answered the following questions:

Projecting The Future

Do you find yourself participating in any of these behaviors?

Are You Talking Yourself Into A Relationship

What do you do when you identify you are demonstrating these behaviors?

Danger Signs

How do you take a break to reset if you identify these behaviors in a potential partner or within yourself?

Other Common Red Flags

How do you address these things in a prospective relationship?
Are you willing to negotiate or wait for an individual to course-correct/change when demonstrating these behaviors?
Lastly, they shared their non-negotiables, dating support system, and when one should not date.
Stay Connected:
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Or, if you have questions or would like to discuss podcast sponsorship, email us at
momsandmartinispodcast@gmail.com.
The hashtag for the podcast is #momsandmartinis and #momsandmartinispodcast
Make sure to follow us on social media:
Twitter: @momsandmartinis
Facebook: @momsandmartinis
Instagram: @momsandmartinispod

Connect with our Guest:
Instagram: @pmkester
linktr.ee/pmkester
www.pmkesterenterprisesllc.com/
Order the journal here.
Jan 20, 202301:30:12
Dating: Stop Trying To Fix It

Dating: Stop Trying To Fix It

In this episode, Kira talks with Jarratt about their dating experiences. Kira shared how sliding into Jarratt's DM turned into them exploring if they were compatible. Kira shared how she quickly moves between relationships and has learned to slow down to assess if her potential mate is the right fit. Jarratt shared that he made sure his ex was in a good head and heart space before moving on. Jarratt shared the silver lining of dating during the pandemic and how it removed some of the pressures of dating in person. Finally, the two answered the tricky question of who should decide to end a dating situation when it's clear one is unable or unwilling to provide what the other needs. Kira questions her willingness to fight for a relationship and stick through tough times.
Jarratt and Kira discuss their experience dating each other. Jarratt shared how it was refreshing to lay the cards on the table; yet, the straightforwardness and Kira's assertive approach can turn off the other person if they are not ready or moving at a similar pace. Kira admits that she quickly detaches from people and situations and moves on quickly, can perceive as cold and distant. Jarratt shares how his 'cheat codes' and Kira's 'blueprint' accompanied with their need to fix others, ultimately sabotages their desires for meaningful mutual relationships. Jarratt encourages Kira to exercise patience and provides wise and insightful feedback as she continues accepting applications for #OperationStepdad.

Guest: Jarratt, It's About Damn Time Podcast
Song Credit: Love 'Em All by K. Michelle
This episode is sponsored by Raw Truth: Stories of Female Infidelity
For more information:
linktr.ee/Rebecca.rawtruth
Website: www.rawtruthstoriesoffemaleinfidelity.com
Email rebecca.rawtruth@gmail.com
Jan 20, 202301:02:11
Pre-Op: What's Your Emotional Diet?

Pre-Op: What's Your Emotional Diet?

In the season four premiere, Kira is joined at the kitchen table with BJ to discuss her readiness for love, dissecting where her blockage lies, the risks of dating, properly preparing for a healthy relationship, and the long-term work needed sustain the relationship. The two explore the interesting dynamics of the heart and mind versus wants and desires. Using the analogy of heart surgery, BJ begins with a pre-op assessment to determine if Kira's perceived need and self-identified symptoms are truly the issues and if surgery is warranted. Next, BJ explains how social spaces often serve as a Heart Health WebMD, causing many to misdiagnose themselves, derailing preparing healing and growth in spaces. Therefore, one may develop identify red flags, which are actually a sign that one may need to develop a more sensibility to emotions perceived as a threat when it is an invitation for healthier communication.
BJ explains how years of malpractice through self-medicating could pose an obstacle when assessing if your new potential primary care provider (partner) new methods and prescriptions towards healing are accurate or worth exploring. The two discuss tips for successful dating and the importance of deep conversations when courting. BJ also elaborates on his side of the analogy covered on his show, Who Gets Love, if it is fair to disqualify a potential partner because of their weaknesses. He also asks if we are giving the other person credit for their efforts. The two covered this and so much more. Tune in and find out if you are emotionally healthy enough to enter into a relationship?

Guest: BJ, Creative Director/CEO, Host, Who Gets Love Podcast
Song Credit: Girl Like Me by Jazmine Sullivan featuring H.E.R.

This episode is sponsored by Raw Truth: Stories of Female Infidelity
For more information:
linktr.ee/Rebecca.rawtruth
Website: www.rawtruthstoriesoffemaleinfidelity.com
Email rebecca.rawtruth@gmail.com
Jan 20, 202301:26:43
BONUS: Season 4 Sneak Peek

BONUS: Season 4 Sneak Peek

BONUS EPISODE ALERT!
In the season 4 sneak peek, the host, Kira explains why she decided to focus on all matters of the heart this season. She breaks down the analogy of heart surgery and why this is an important step in her quest of #OperationStepdad.
In this season, friends at the table will answer the following questions:

Who was your first love?
When was the first time you had your heart broken?
Describe love
What is intimacy?
What's most important in sustaining a healthy relationship?

You will not be disappointed in this season. We have some amazing topics to explore, hard questions to answer, and some deep soul searching requiring transparency. Are you ready?
Cheers to a successful season! But first, hold my martini.
Song Credit: Dear Lisa by 1 A.M.
Season 4, Episode 44
Angel Number 444 is a message that you have nothing to fear in regards to your life, work and Divine life purpose. When you take positive action towards your highest intentions, aspirations and goals, the Universe works in your favour and helps you to establish solid foundations and advance you along your path. Know that the angels surround and support you, encouraging you to keep up the good work you have been doing. (Source: http://sacredscribesangelnumbers.blogspot.com/2011/09/angel-number-444.html)
Jan 20, 202325:33
Heart History: My First Love

Heart History: My First Love

In this episode, Kira's dad, Dr. H, joins in the conversation to talk about what makes a good stepdad. He has 13 children (that he knows about), which includes five biological children and eight bonus children. Dr. H shares why he has always insisted on not labeling his blended family as "half or step". He tells the story of his great aunt who told him never to speak to her again if he did not take care of his children. Kira gets emotional as she describes the love and care her stepmother has for her. She shares why she feels that she set an ideal example of who co-parenting in a blended family should look like. Kira's parents have been together for 35 years, and her father provide insights on how he has been able to sustain his long term relationship.
Dr. H shares the two heart surgeries he had in Aug 1994 and May 2002. Kira ties his procedures into her quest for love outlining how hereditary issues and her personal self love journey have shaped her views on love. They discuss that similar to some heart surgeries a person may have to take from other parts of themselves to make themselves whole and receptive to love. During that time, one may have to rely on their support system, change who and where they receive information, and change the way they live to receive love. They also discuss that having a second surgery is likely; however, it could be life threatening. Which in terms of love, one may never recovery from a broken heart and commit themselves to a life of singleness and become unwilling to love again.
Kira's dad describes her as a child. He says he knew she was different when she turned 2 weeks old and how she carved a special place in her heart. They share four phone calls that caused a pivot in their relationship. The first of him telling her that he was not returning back to Atlanta to live with her, her brother, and mom as a father. The second, when Kira called to share that her mom was sick and needed help closes out family affairs. The third when Kira left a voice message using her second language of profanity telling her dad how she felt. Then the fourth call back from Kira to apologize, forgive her father, and begin to heal their relationship.
Kira is shocked to learn that her father thinks she should wait to get into a relationship. However, he does describe what he thinks would be the ideal partner for his daughter and why traditional gender roles would never work for Kira. Dr. H shares why he believes women are more durable than men and why they should not sacrifice their own dreams for those of her partner.

Guest: Dr. Rev. Frederick Hancock I
Song Credit: Daddy by Beyonce

This episode is sponsored by Raw Truth: Stories of Female Infidelity
For more information:
linktr.ee/Rebecca.rawtruth
Website: www.rawtruthstoriesoffemaleinfidelity.com
Email rebecca.rawtruth@gmail.com
Jan 20, 202301:25:03
The Invisible Suitcase: Dating with Trauma

The Invisible Suitcase: Dating with Trauma

In this episode, Tiana Renee and Kira discuss how trauma impacts our approach to dating, love and relationships. They discuss how our frame of reference is packed away in our invisible suitcase and take that into all of our relationship (friends, family, and intimate partner). Additionally how the individuals in our lives challenge the work and healing that we have completed on ourselves. Tiana talks about how anxiety and certain sensations that resembles our trauma can lead to us targeting our partner which may not always be the case. She also breaks down how our brain is trained to respond to trauma. Kira shares why she believes your expectations show up in your behavior and how it reflects in our core beliefs. They both share how they detach from people and situations and how they prepare themselves for the worst case situation. They shared how healing looks in different people; especially when dating. Every person in your life will reveal something about you. The people who challenge you if they care, building a foundation that is built to last. Every time someone pulls something out of you, they are revealing another part of you. Tiana credits her therapist for references the Zillow commercial of Sue, who had to face all parts of herself when making a buying decision. The negative, spontaneous, paranoid, anti-social, lazy, stressed, helpful, and gullible sides of yourself. Therefore, you have to consider the people at your table and which side of yourself who is doing the work. Kira shares how she invests in her children mental health that will require additional professional resources. The two review a Psychology Today article about childhood trauma and Tiana shares tips for parents of children who have or are experiencing trauma. Kira shares how not address her childhood trauma cause her to consider conversations as confrontation. Kira asks the question that many may be asking, “Will everyone have trauma?” Tiana shares how a person’s environment and cultural norms contributes to how a person respond to experiences.
Guest: Tiana Renee, Cope for the Culture
Song Credit: Be Happy, Mary J. Blige
Book Reference:
The Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy
Zillow Commercial (Sue):
youtu.be/amb7j9CY3bY
Psychology Today article:
Early Childhood Trauma: How Parents Can Help
www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-race-good-health/201309/early-childhood-trauma-how-parents-can-help
Jan 20, 202301:10:46
Let's Get Naked with Queen Poison

Let's Get Naked with Queen Poison

Taneisha Brianna, widely known as Queen Poison, shares the process of writing her latest two books, Naked and Layers. She shares how love has evolved from her 20’s to her 30’s. She bold and unapologetic in this transparent conversation about sex, love, heartbreak, relationships, and admiration for black men. The two share how embrace femininity has helped them become more comfortable in evolving into womanhood. Queen shares the intimate moment of her losing her virginity and how the guy responded to her. Queens reads some of the invigorating poems and tells the stories behind the poems. Kira shares why it took so long to recover from her last heartbreak. The two share the hardest parts about a breakup. Taneisha explains that determent of remaining in relationships that do not serve us. Ultimately leading us with a necessary healing process. She also shares the moment she received an unexpected apology from the ex who inspired her latest book, Layers. Kira also shares how she has been an emotional safety net for the men in her life and how it has impacted her emotional health. The two share why they block all communication from those men post relationship. Kira shares how detachment has caused her ex-lovers to feel she’s coldhearted, distant, and emotionless. Kira shares her superpower of making a black man blush by creating pockets of intimacy. The two share the challenges of getting to know someone intimately. Lastly, they share what makes a man attractive to them. This is a conversation that you do not want to miss.
Guest: Taneisha Brianna, Queen Poison, Author
Song: Sex You… by Backyard Band
Purchase Layers by Taneisha Brianna:
www.amazon.com/dp/B08QRZ7TL7/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glc_fabc_-z63FbRHWB4P3
Purchase Naked:Poems by Taneisha Brianna: www.amazon.com/Naked-Poems-Taneisha-Brianna/dp/1724964941
Jan 20, 202357:43
Surviving Domestic Violence

Surviving Domestic Violence

In this episode of Moms and Martinis, Shereece and Desi join me to discuss our experience with domestic violence. We discuss the six types of abuse - physical, sexual, verbal/emotional, mental/psychological, financial/economic, and cultural/identity. We answer the tough questions about why we stayed, why we returned, share if we ignored the signs, and provide advice to women who are looking for love after being in an abusive relationship.
An abusive relationship can include any or all of these types of behaviors, sustained over a period of time and often escalating. If you or anyone you know is a victim of abuse and want to talk, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Call 1-800-799-7233, or if you're unable to speak safely, you can log onto
thehotline.org or text LOVEIS to 22522. You are not alone.
Stay in contact with the guest:
Shereece
If you are interested in joining in raw conversations with the Hot Shots, head over to Facebook and search for The Hot Tody Report.
Desi
If you would like to try some amazing new hair and skin products, head over to desireelaurelle.mymonat.com/. Also, check out her podcast at Oh...She Mixed! anchor.fm/desiree-laurelle

Bobbi Kristina Serenity House
bobbikristinaserenityhouse.org/
Census 2020 2020census.gov/
Shape your future by responding to the 2020 Census online, by phone, or by mail.
Census results help determine how billions of dollars in federal funding flow into states and communities each year. The results determine how many seats in Congress each state gets. It's mandated by the U.S. Constitution in Article 1, Section 2: The U.S. has counted its population every 10 years since 1790.

Want to stay connected? All information about Moms and Martinis can be found on Linktree at linktr.ee/momsandmartinis
Jan 20, 202301:44:24
Toxic People
Jan 20, 202356:11
January 5, 2020

January 5, 2020

Jan 05, 202000:60