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Not Safe For Words

Not Safe For Words

By Crystal L. Kirkham
An opinion podcast about writing, the writing community, and how to not be an asshole author hosted by author and publisher, Crystal L. Kirkham.
All views expressed in this podcast are entirely my own, devised with the knowledge and research available to me at the time of recording. They do not represent the opinions of any other entity with which I have been, am now, or will be affiliated. However, I am human and subject to error. Gentle correction is always appreciated.
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A Thousand Paths
The journey to becoming a published author isn't going to be quick and easy. It's also going to look different for everyone.
July 21, 2021
Comparison Titles: A Necessary Evil
Be original, but tell us what books your story will remind us of. I know it seems confusing, but here's why agents and publishers ask for them, how to find them, and what it might mean for your book. 
July 7, 2021
Genre-ly Confused
You've got to know your genres to get your book into the right  hands—whether reader, agent, or publisher. If you don't nail this part,  there is a good chance things aren't going to go so smoothly. And with so many genres and sub-genres to keep track of, sometimes this is a monumental task.
June 23, 2021
The Query Conundrum
You've got your manuscript, you bled for your synopsis... now you must query the publishers and/or agent if you're aiming for more traditional publishing. This all means, you're also likely to get a lot of rejections. Resources mentioned: and
June 9, 2021
Synopsis? Oh, no!
The dreaded synopsis is something that nearly every author out there  moans and groans about. I can't promise you'll ever like writing them,  but here's some advice on how to get the right.
May 26, 2021
Pitching it on Twitter
Twitter pitch events can be an exciting whirlwind. Here's what they are,  how they work, and how to not waste your time if you decide to  participate.
May 12, 2021
Is it Ready?
You've been working on that manuscript forever—or it seems that way—but how do you know it's ready to be submitted to a publisher? Well, that is the hard question and, hopefully, I can help you find some answers.
April 28, 2021
Alpha, Beta, CP, ARC: Your Early Readers
Who are these people? How do you find them? And why you should use them? Book recommendation: Early Readers Catch the Worms by Carol Beth Anderson On a totally unrelated note, happy 42nd Anniversary to my parents. I love you and thank you for believing in me. xoxoxo
April 14, 2021
Reasonable Expectations
You're probably not going to be an international best-selling author—and you need to be okay with that.
March 31, 2021
Publishing Process in a Nutshell
From the final draft to the bookstore shelves, it's time we lay out what to expect from the publishing process. There's a whole lot of hurry up and wait going on.
March 17, 2021
Pen Name Problems
There are good reasons to use a pen name. There are even good reasons to write under an assumed gender. There are also a few things you should never do—and I don't say never lightly.
March 3, 2021
Pay to Play
When you're submitting work for genre publishers, you should never be asked to pay for anything to do with submitting—no matter how innocently it is stated.
February 21, 2021
Author Branded
People talk about building your "author brand", but what the hell does that even mean? What is an author brand?
February 17, 2021
There's only one way to grow and build a community... and it doesn't start with keeping people out.
February 16, 2021
Your Intro to Bonus Episodes
One of the things about this podcast is that you are going to find the  occasional bonus episode peppered among the regularly scheduled  programming. These short little episodes will answer your questions or respond to current issues in the writing community. If you want me to do a hot-take bonus episode about anything, let me know! Ideally, drop me a line on Twitter. I am @canuckclick
February 10, 2021
Putting the Pro in Professional
Being an author, or even an aspiring author, means having to be professional, but it seems a few people out there missed the memo. Here are a few quick tips on why it's important and how to do it.
February 3, 2021
Not Safe For Words - Your NSFW Writers Podcast
Welcome to Not Safe For Words. In this first season, we are taking a  more general approach to understand publishing, the writing community,  and how not to be an asshole author. But today, we're talking about me and how this podcast came to be.
January 20, 2021
Hey! Buy My Book!
Being an author is hard. Being a professional author or aspiring author  on social media can be so much harder. Especially when you don't know all the rules.
January 18, 2021
Dear Twitter Friend
This is just a tiny example of what sort of things you can expect to hear about in this podcast along with actual advice on what it takes to be an author.
January 15, 2021
Why should you even listen to me?
Here's a rundown of what you can expect from me, why you should even listen to me and this podcast. Not to mention, why you should damn well listen.
January 13, 2021
Expect the Unexpected - Bonus
Happy solstice friends. I wasn't planning to record this—it just happened. Consider it your Christmas bonus.
December 21, 2020