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Not Safe For Words

Not Safe For Words

By Crystal L. Kirkham

An opinion podcast about writing, the writing community, and how to not be an asshole author hosted by author and publisher, Crystal L. Kirkham.
All views expressed in this podcast are entirely my own, devised with the knowledge and research available to me at the time of recording. They do not represent the opinions of any other entity with which I have been, am now, or will be affiliated. However, I am human and subject to error. Gentle correction is always appreciated.
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Dear Twitter Friend

Not Safe For WordsJan 15, 2021

00:00
02:46
All the Adoring Fans

All the Adoring Fans

Here we go with the continuation of our interrupted season 2! If you listened to the last episode, you now know WHO your readers are, but where are they? How do you find them? If you're lucky, you may already have fans of your work. If you're not lucky, you need to figure out where they are and convince them to read your work. Definitely not the easiest task!

Feb 02, 202311:41
A Return From Burnout

A Return From Burnout

Season two didn't end, it just disappeared. This little bonus episode is here to let you know what happened, why it happened, and where we're going from here. 

Man, I missed this. 

Jan 25, 202304:33
Target Acquired: Identifying Your Readers

Target Acquired: Identifying Your Readers

If you want to be able to find your audience, you need to know who that ideal reader is—and it ain't yo' mama... or maybe it is.
Seriously though, this is where some of the shit I've talked about last season really comes into play. You need to know who your reader is so you market your book to them.

Aug 17, 202211:27
Selling Doesn't Make You a Sell-out

Selling Doesn't Make You a Sell-out

You have achieved the goal. Your novel is signed, you are going to make  money, but there are changes that need to be made to your story. This is  the inevitability of traditional publishing. This doesn't make you a  sell-out.

Aug 17, 202212:06
Unpaid Anthologies: A Scam or a Foot in the Door?

Unpaid Anthologies: A Scam or a Foot in the Door?

"It's good exposure!" There is a phrase that every artist has heard at  least once in seriousness. When it comes to writing, there are a lot of  unpaid anthologies. Some are legitimately a foot in the door and others  aren't. You need to know the difference and understand both sides of this coin.

Jul 20, 202215:39
Free is Great, But Is It Right?

Free is Great, But Is It Right?

Free stories on a blog or website can be awesome. Everyone likes something for free and you're putting your work out there, but are you doing yourself and your stories a disservice?

Jul 06, 202213:28
Meet Me Outside: Calling People Out

Meet Me Outside: Calling People Out

You see that post that makes you wonder if someone is intentionally being an ass or if you might be misreading things—what do you do?

This can be a hard line to toe and the wrong response might do your career as a writer a lot of damage.

Jun 22, 202210:40
When the Mask Comes Off

When the Mask Comes Off

What to do and how to deal with those in the writing community that turn  out to be bigots, predators, or otherwise loathsome people.
And what do you do if this person is someone you used to admire?

Jun 08, 202213:44
Dealing with Bitter Bastards

Dealing with Bitter Bastards

You made a sale! You signed a contract! Things are going well! Most  people are really damned happy for you—keyword is most. There will be  some bitter bastards always trying to drag you down.
Don't let them.

May 25, 202210:14
Did I Ask For Your Opinion?

Did I Ask For Your Opinion?

Unsolicited advice is one of those things that will always happen. People have opinions and far too many of them like to wave those opinions around for others to see. 

Don't be that person.

May 25, 202212:21
Professionalism Part Deux

Professionalism Part Deux

So, you got a bad review, a critique that hurt, sales are slagging or another rejection came back. It happens, but being publicly negative doesn't help your case.

Apr 27, 202214:42
Rejection: It's Not You, It's Me

Rejection: It's Not You, It's Me

Every author trying to go the route of traditional publishing will face  rejection. It's crushing, but it isn't the end of your writing career unless you let it be.

Apr 13, 202215:31
I Object! Where's the Objectivity?

I Object! Where's the Objectivity?

It's all subjective, even when someone tries to be critical and objective about things.
This is an art, not a science. Dealing with shit is easier when you remember that fact.

Apr 05, 202218:30
Dealing with Bad Reviews

Dealing with Bad Reviews

***Sorry about the technical issues on this episode guys. My computer was fighting and freezing the entire recording!**

There is no doubt that some people really do not know how to leave a review without being unreasonable or mean. As an author, it's going to happen and you need to be able to handle it. 

Mar 16, 202214:34
The Art of Leaving Reviews

The Art of Leaving Reviews

Leaving a review, especially for a book that wasn't that great, isn't easy to do. Some reviewers don't seem to care about balance, but the art of a good review—even of a bad book—is balance.

Mar 02, 202223:19
Critique Group Chaos

Critique Group Chaos

Critique groups have their place, but there are some horror stories out  there. Cliquey, bad advice, and other writing group drama will happen.  So, is it worth your time?

Feb 16, 202212:51
Give It and Get It: Construcive Criticism

Give It and Get It: Construcive Criticism

Giving and receiving constructive criticism is a careful balancing act—one that a lot of people struggle with. So, let's talk about the tightrope walk we take both when receiving and giving criticism. 

Feb 02, 202216:42
New Year, New Rants

New Year, New Rants

Welcome to a whole new year of Not Safe For Words! We're going to give a bit deeper into dealing with others as a writer—including the ones you'd like to see fall off the face of the planet. From readers to reviewers to other authors. We'll cover as much as we can in the next twenty-two episodes. 

Jan 19, 202208:03
Hindsight is 2021

Hindsight is 2021

Looking back on the first year of Not Safe For Words. I'm glad to have  shared this journey with you. Here are a few of the lessons we learned, a  few more words of advice, and a challenge (homework if you will) as we  move forward toward a new year.

I hope you join me for season two starting January 19, 2022.

Dec 08, 202112:49
It's Not A Marathon or a Race: It's Trek

It's Not A Marathon or a Race: It's Trek

How often has someone said, "It's a marathon, not a race" when talking about the long haul to becoming a published author? If you haven't heard that before, consider yourself lucky. There's only one problem with this phrase: it's not a marathon.
In a marathon, the first one across the line wins. Publishing isn't a competition though. It's a  journey—a trek through the wilderness—and we are all in it together.

Nov 24, 202111:42
Writer's Block or Burnout: Know the Difference

Writer's Block or Burnout: Know the Difference

Writer's block. It's a phrase that is thrown around a lot, but did you  know that there is something called writer's burnout too? Let's talk  about what these two things are, how to tell the difference, and what  you can do for getting through both.

Nov 10, 202120:29
Getting It Done: That Far Away Finish Line

Getting It Done: That Far Away Finish Line

How often do you hear others complaining about not being able to finish?  Have you complained about this too? We've all been there, but getting it finished is one of the first steps to getting it published.
Okay,  but how the hell do we do that if inspiration or motivation might be lacking? Or if we are staring down the barrel of writer's block or burnout?

Oct 27, 202120:42
Fast Drafting: Permission to Suck

Fast Drafting: Permission to Suck

With all the advice to be found—my own included—you need to decide what  works for you and what doesn't. Fast drafting is a tool that not  everyone knows or understands. Including the one thing that makes fast  drafting work better for some than others.

Oct 13, 202115:10
NaNoWriMo: It's Not For Everyone
Sep 29, 202116:24
Plotting It All Out

Plotting It All Out

Outlining. There are a million different ways to do this. Some people  hate planning it all out, but there are times when it is necessary.

Sep 15, 202115:48
Writing By the Seat of Your Pants

Writing By the Seat of Your Pants

Pantsing is a term used to describe a style of writing where there is no outline, no real plan. You discover the story as you go, but can this work for you?

Sep 01, 202113:10
Try It, Don't Buy It

Try It, Don't Buy It

Experimentation can help you grow as a writer. Trying your hand at new  genres and styles can teach you things and enrich your writing.

Aug 18, 202112:23
Long Story Short

Long Story Short

Microfiction, flash fiction, drabbles, short stories, novelettes, novellas and novels.
Some of these are overlapping terms, but they are all different things and you need to know the difference.

Aug 06, 202110:18
KISS Your Manuscript Formatting

KISS Your Manuscript Formatting

Formatting a manuscript isn't rocket science. Best advice you can follow is the KISS principle. Keep it simple.

Jul 29, 202104:02
A Thousand Paths

A Thousand Paths

The journey to becoming a published author isn't going to be quick and easy. It's also going to look different for everyone.

Jul 21, 202111:59
Comparison Titles: A Necessary Evil

Comparison Titles: A Necessary Evil

Be original, but tell us what books your story will remind us of. I know it seems confusing, but here's why agents and publishers ask for them, how to find them, and what it might mean for your book. 

Jul 07, 202113:30
Genre-ly Confused

Genre-ly Confused

You've got to know your genres to get your book into the right  hands—whether reader, agent, or publisher. If you don't nail this part,  there is a good chance things aren't going to go so smoothly.
And with so many genres and sub-genres to keep track of, sometimes this is a monumental task.

Jun 23, 202115:20
The Query Conundrum
Jun 09, 202114:33
Synopsis? Oh, no!

Synopsis? Oh, no!

The dreaded synopsis is something that nearly every author out there  moans and groans about. I can't promise you'll ever like writing them,  but here's some advice on how to get the right.

May 26, 202110:20
Pitching it on Twitter

Pitching it on Twitter

Twitter pitch events can be an exciting whirlwind. Here's what they are,  how they work, and how to not waste your time if you decide to  participate.

May 12, 202112:53
Is it Ready?

Is it Ready?

You've been working on that manuscript forever—or it seems that way—but how do you know it's ready to be submitted to a publisher? Well, that is the hard question and, hopefully, I can help you find some answers.

Apr 28, 202110:18
Alpha, Beta, CP, ARC: Your Early Readers
Apr 14, 202113:14
Reasonable Expectations

Reasonable Expectations

You're probably not going to be an international best-selling author—and you need to be okay with that.

Mar 31, 202111:06
Publishing Process in a Nutshell

Publishing Process in a Nutshell

From the final draft to the bookstore shelves, it's time we lay out what to expect from the publishing process. There's a whole lot of hurry up and wait going on.

Mar 17, 202112:33
Pen Name Problems

Pen Name Problems

There are good reasons to use a pen name. There are even good reasons to write under an assumed gender.
There are also a few things you should never do—and I don't say never lightly.

Mar 03, 202111:51
Pay to Play

Pay to Play

When you're submitting work for genre publishers, you should never be asked to pay for anything to do with submitting—no matter how innocently it is stated.

Feb 21, 202106:46
Author Branded

Author Branded

People talk about building your "author brand", but what the hell does that even mean? What is an author brand?

Feb 17, 202112:23
Gatekeeping

Gatekeeping

There's only one way to grow and build a community... and it doesn't start with keeping people out.

Feb 16, 202102:26
Your Intro to Bonus Episodes

Your Intro to Bonus Episodes

One of the things about this podcast is that you are going to find the  occasional bonus episode peppered among the regularly scheduled  programming.
These short little episodes will answer your questions or respond to current issues in the writing community.
If you want me to do a hot-take bonus episode about anything, let me know! Ideally, drop me a line on Twitter. I am @canuckclick

Feb 10, 202101:38
 Putting the Pro in Professional

Putting the Pro in Professional

Being an author, or even an aspiring author, means having to be professional, but it seems a few people out there missed the memo.
Here are a few quick tips on why it's important and how to do it.

Feb 03, 202112:19
Not Safe For Words - Your NSFW Writers Podcast

Not Safe For Words - Your NSFW Writers Podcast

Welcome to Not Safe For Words.
In this first season, we are taking a  more general approach to understand publishing, the writing community,  and how not to be an asshole author.
But today, we're talking about me and how this podcast came to be.

Jan 20, 202107:01
Hey! Buy My Book!

Hey! Buy My Book!

Being an author is hard. Being a professional author or aspiring author  on social media can be so much harder. Especially when you don't know all the rules.

Jan 18, 202102:31
Dear Twitter Friend

Dear Twitter Friend

This is just a tiny example of what sort of things you can expect to hear about in this podcast along with actual advice on what it takes to be an author.

Jan 15, 202102:46
Why should you even listen to me?

Why should you even listen to me?

Here's a rundown of what you can expect from me, why you should even listen to me and this podcast. Not to mention, why you should damn well listen.

Jan 13, 202102:38
Expect the Unexpected - Bonus

Expect the Unexpected - Bonus

Happy solstice friends. I wasn't planning to record this—it just happened. Consider it your Christmas bonus.

Dec 21, 202002:51