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Our Messy Collective

Our Messy Collective

By Carey Shofner & Suzanne Gillies-Smith
Two friends sharing stories and hosting guests to discuss the messy world of motherhood. As plus size moms we have dreamed of creating a welcoming, supportive, and inclusive community that holds space for all mothers. Regardless of size, race, gender, disability, social background, religion, or sexual orientation. If you love a little one, we love you!
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Currently playing episode

Episode 11: Struggle Care with KC Davis

Our Messy Collective

Episode 11: Struggle Care with KC Davis

Our Messy Collective

S2E4: Easy, Breezy, Beautiful Enneagram
Suzanne & Carey catch up and discuss their enneagram types, their favorite enneagram Instagram accounts, and their understanding of the enneagram. Click here for more!
March 1, 2021
S2E3: Babies & Business with Kayleigh M.
 This week Carey and Suzanne catch up, share stories from their week, and discuss their new adventures on Clubhouse! Our guest this week is Kayleigh of Heritage Baby Designs. Carey and Kayleigh discuss motherhood, infertility and loss, and life as a business owner. -- Heritage Baby is the brainchild of me - Kayleigh, mother to William who resides in Simcoe County in Ontario, Canada.  I can't tell you the exact moment that I knew that this was an adventure that I wanted to embark on, but it has felt 500% right from the start.  Before my son was born I knew that I wanted to try to be one of those moms with her baby strapped to her body.  It always seemed that those babies were so calm and comfortable, and those parents always had their hands free!  This appealed to my general busy nature.  William was in his first baby carrier (a stretchy wrap) by the time he hit 12hrs old....I was hooked. As my obsession for babywearing grew, so did my desire to find a product and brand that fit my wants; an eco-conscious, company that gives back, parent-owned and operated, handmade, and cute (think patterns).  I made my first sling to fit these wants and more, and so Heritage was born. The name Heritage came to me when I started thinking about what mattered to me in my life and what sets my family apart.  I am of Jamaican and Guyanese descent, and my husband Portuguese, but we're both born in Canada.  Each carrier is (and will be) named after places that are close to our hearts and the hearts of those we know and love.
February 22, 2021
S2E2: Fat Positive Motherhood with Nikki B.
Suzanne and Carey catch up and spill the details on their new M E R C H! After our weekly check-in, we have a guest interview. This week we are joined by Nikki, a busy woman with a mission! Suzanne and Nikki discuss her brand, Fat Positive Motherhood, her 9-5 career as a business analyst, her small business providing career coaching, and all things motherhood. Special cameo by Nikki's passionate 8 month old! Nikki B. is a wife, mom, career Coach, fat positive advocate and serial binge watcher living her best life in South Carolina with her obnoxiously loud dog, collection of teen fiction novels, and Sims games. You’ll often find her writing resumes or coaching clients as the founder of Corporate Melanin Millennial, cooking in the kitchen while her hubby washes the dishes, or her new favorite- cuddling her daughter. Connect with Nikki online here: Instagram  Career Coaching Twitter
February 8, 2021
S2E1: Slightly Messier
We're back! With champagne and hard seltzer in tow, we discuss 2021, Gen Z, Carey's Vagina, and upcoming month! Join us for our Season 2 opener. Would you like to be a guest in Season 2? Email us at or DM on Instagram @ourmessycollective. Are you following our TikTok? It's @ourmessycollective Love our work and want to support us with a monthly contribution of as little as 99¢? Click this link for more info!
February 1, 2021
Episode 14: The First Last One
In our Season 1 Finale, we catch up, talk about the upcoming holidays, and discuss our hopes for Season 2! We reflect on our past guests, what we've learned about ourselves, how we can uphold boundaries during the pandemic, and look forward to the new year with realistic expectations. Thank you for tuning in to the first season of Our Messy Collective! We will return in 2021!
December 21, 2020
Episode 13: Eat the Food, Drink the Drinks with @DevonElizabethPlz
This week Suzanne and Carey catch up, and talk about winding down Season 1! A celebration giveaway is going on over on our Instagram RIGHT NOW! Our guest this week is Devon. Get to know Devon in her own words here: TikTok: @devonelizabethplz Instagram: DevonElizabethPlz Hello! My name is Devon and I am a fat activist on TikTok. I started on TikTok in March 2020 to pass the time in lockdown, but quickly found myself leaping into the world of fat activism and delivering lectures into my phone. I focus on systemic issues fat people face and use my personal experiences with fatphobia to create a place of community. I also proudly identify as a fat woman and dedicate a lot to work towards changing the narrative around the word “fat”. By day I am a second year law student with an undecided legal path. However, I do hope to work as an advocate for victims of domestic violence in some capacity. I am also a live-in caretaker for my 94-year-old Nana, a wife, a dog mom, a boxer (in my garage), and occasionally, I sleep!
December 14, 2020
Episode 12: Still Here, Still Messy
Carey and Suzanne update one another and listeners on life since our last episode. We talk about the pandemic, our kids, resiliency, and upcoming episodes. 
December 7, 2020
Episode 11: Struggle Care with KC Davis
In our 11th episode,  we catch up on our lives the past week. Then Suzanne sits down to talk to KC Davis (@domesticblisters on TikTok) about the Six Pillars of Struggle Care from her website and her new book How to Keep House While Drowning! (Click to read a sample) Get to know KC in her own words, below! -- I'm KC Davis, a licensed professional counselor, mother of two, and creator of After having my second baby in a new city right as the world shut down from COVID-19, I found herself without access to a support network for months on end. I used every tool in my therapy training arsenal and created a self-compassionate way to address my stress, depression, and ever-mounting laundry pile. After sharing this unique approach on social media, I found myself with 180k followers in under 90 days. The struggle resonated with so many people that I decided to write a book about my approach: How to Keep House While Drowning debuts in November 2020.
November 16, 2020
Episode 10: Loving Motherhood with Carla Thomas
Carla Thomas of Loving Motherhood joins Suzanne for a conversation about her latest project, Loving Holidays.  Carla Thomas is a master life coach and mom who created the online village Loving Motherhood with the mission to help you love your motherhood as much as you love your baby. Loving Motherhood was born in her heart during the long lonely nights awake with a breastfeeding newborn. She longed to find an online space where she could make sense of the transformational journey she was on as a new mom and get to know herself again. Through her Loving Motherhood platform she helps new moms process their transformation from maiden to mother, get to know themselves in this new phase of life, and build communication and relationship skills. Social: Sites:
November 9, 2020
My World's On Fire, How 'Bout Yours?
It's election week in the US and we thought we'd spend a few minutes together just to catch up. We talk about taking care of ourselves, where the election currently stands, and how we're surviving the uncertainty of this historic time. Join us for a moment just to take a break.
November 6, 2020
Episode 9: Hannah Talks Bodies
This week we talk to Hannah Fuhlendorf, MA NCC LPCC about bodies, food, family, the holidays, and boundaries. We also discuss self-care and how to navigate Election week with intention. Hannah Fuhlendorf is a professional counselor, personal coach, and public speaker who specializes in the areas of social justice, fat liberation, and Health at Every Size. She has worked professionally in progressive politics, human rights, eating disorder treatment, substance use treatment, and community mental health. Hannah is a Nationally Certified Counselor (NCC) through the National Board of Certified Counselors and has a master’s degree in clinical mental health counseling. When Hannah isn’t working with clients or making TikToks, she enjoys swimming, cooking, and hanging out with her husband and two cats at their home in Colorado. Handles: TikTok and Insta: HannahTalksBodies Web:
November 2, 2020
Episode 8: What babywearing means to YOU!
We asked you, our listeners, to tell us what babywearing means to you. Your messages are so lovely and full of heartfelt meaning. We feature ten of our listeners and their stories. Thank you all so much for sharing with us! We are so glad to end Babywearing Month 2020 with our first collective episode! Stay tuned for our NEXT collective!
October 26, 2020
Episode 7: #plussizebabywearing with Mia O'Malley
In our seventh episode, we briefly catch up and talk about how we've been doing and then we get in to our FIRST EVER guest interview! Mia O'Malley is an influencer and advocate for plus size parents and the founder of @plussizebabywearing on Instagram. She is a certified babywearing educator, a social media consultant, a writer, and a mom. She has been featured on the Today Show, Cup of Jo, Plus Size Birth, and The Plus Mommy Podcast. She loves babywearing, The Office, and most of all being a mom to her 2 year old son Ivan. To book a consultation with her head to You can follow her on Instagram @miaomalley
October 19, 2020
Episode 6: Babywearing + Catching Up
This week we attempt to get back on schedule after both experiencing some unexpected issues. We talk about how we've been doing, how we became friends, how we found babywearing, and how we navigate babywearing as plus size parents. We also discuss World Mental Health Day (10/10) and National Coming Out Day (10/11) Links: It Feels Good To Be Yourself: A Book on Gender Identity Being a Super Trans Ally Sex Positive Families LGBTQ+ Reading List Plus Size Babywearing
October 12, 2020
Episode 5: The NICU
In observation of NICU Awareness Month, Suzanne shares her birth and NICU story with Carey (and listeners) for the first time. We discuss birth complications, NICU realities, and postpartum. 
September 28, 2020
Episode 4: Mental Health & How We Manage
This week we're digging in. We discuss mental health, mental illnesses, postpartum mental health issues, and the state of the world right now. We talk about our personal histories and our current stages of mental well-being. Due to the heavy nature of our content this week, we understand if you decide to skip this episode or save it for a time when you can listen safely.
September 21, 2020
S1E3: Our Big Fat (not Greek) Weddings
We’re both plus size and we’re both married, so we’re diving in to our experiences as brides. In this episode we discuss our engagements, some questions from our listeners, and how we handled wedding planning. We sprinkle in tips and advice along the way so listen carefully, especially if you’re in the wedding planning stages!
September 12, 2020
S1E2: Birth
Last week, we introduced our selves, told you a little about our families, and shared about why we decided to start a podcast. This week? We discuss our birth stories, questions about birth, and more. We both experienced induced births, but our stories are so different. This episode is one of our longer ones, so take your time listening. Take breaks, and come back to it when you have time. We recommend Evidence Based Birth for more information about Inductions We recommend Plus Size Birth and Plus Mommy for more information about all things plus size motherhood from pregnancy to parenting. Follow us on Instagram @ourmessycollective Thanks for listening!
September 5, 2020
S1E1: The Messiest
Get to know us in our very first (super messy) episode! We talk about how we met, our journeys to motherhood, and why we decided to start a podcast in the middle of a pandemic.
August 29, 2020