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Understand Suicide

Understand Suicide

By Paula Fontenelle
Here we will create a safe community to fight the stigma surrounding suicide. I will interview specialists, survivors, and individuals who have a story to tell. We will cover a variety of themes: grief, warning signs, risk factors, contagion, youth, and most importantly, what can be done to prevent suicide.

To contact me, send a message to pfontenelletherapist@gmail.com
Visit my page: www.understandsuicide.com
Facebook Page: bit.ly/2MMLBWO
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As you know, I created this podcast to prevent suicide and provide comfort for those who are grieving the loss of a loved one to suicide.  I am planning the next six months of interviews and knowing your needs would help me immensely, so please click on the link below and fill out a quick form which will take you less than a minute to finish. The questions will let me know the topics that are of interest to you.  CLICK HERE FOR SURVEY OR copy and past the following address: https://bit.ly/3xbZByD Thanks!
01:56
June 8, 2021
Ep. 68 - Anxiety is not what you think | Dr. Judson Brewer
When Dr. Judson Brewer started his career, his approach to treat anxiety reflected what he had learned in medical school: diagnose and medicate, but what he found very early on was that medication was not enough. Actually, for most of his patients, it didn’t help at all, so he tried a new path, and, as most curious, restless minds do, Dr. Judson questioned everything he knew. Today, Dr. Jud, as he is worldly known, approaches anxiety as a habit, something that can be learned, and consequently, unlearned. How? That’s what he shares with us in this interview. I invited him to be a guest on my podcast after I finished his insightful book “Unwinding anxiety: New Science Shows How to Break the Cycles of Worry and Fear to Heal Your Mind.” What I love about the way he presents anxiety is the fact that he introduces this topic in a fresh, bold perspective, which will certainly challenge the way you look at it. Not only that, but most importantly, his vision empowers us to reclaim our ability to change.  In this interview, Dr. Jud offers us effective tools to combat not just anxiety but unhealthy habits, including addictions, that sometimes take over our lives. Quote: “What we resist, persists, and what we feel, heals.” To learn more about Dr. Judson Brewer, visit: www.drjud.com Watch this interview on my YouTube channel "Understand Suicide:”   https://bit.ly/2QMS0H4 Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO    Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com   Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:”  https://amzn.to/2ANczuR  Exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
40:52
May 25, 2021
Ep. 67 - Understanding grief dreams | Dr. Joshua Black
As for most of us in Western cultures, dreams used to mean nothing to Dr. Joshua Black, but that completely changed after the death of his father. At the time, he remembers feeling numb, his life’s colors had disappeared. One day, after a peaceful dream with his dad, “the color was back,” he says, and, as if by magic, he could suddenly function again. Even though it was helpful to him then, he still had no idea that that specific dream would transform and guide his life. Today, Dr. Joshua Black, a PhD in psychology, dedicates his research to grief dreams and their impact on those who are left behind. In this interview, he shares some of the findings with us and helps us answer some of the common questions surrounding dreams: do we all dream? Why some of us can’t remember them? Do they have a function? Is there a way to trick our minds into dreaming more often or even changing their narrative? What about suicide dreams? Are they different? What do they say about our loss? To find out more about Dr. Joshua’s work, his courses, his podcast, and how to set up private consultations, visit his website: https://www.griefdreams.ca/ You can watch this interview on my YouTube channel "Understand Suicide:” https://bit.ly/3uJVM2E Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO  Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:” https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
59:09
May 13, 2021
Ep. 66 - Talking openly about having bipolar disorder | Bill Clemo
The first time Bill Clemo realized that he needed to look into his mental health was right after he started college. At the time, he thought that his sleep deprivation was temporary, so were the mood swings, but after a suicide attempt, it became clear that he needed help. It has been over thirty years since he started treatment for bipolar disorder but the decision to openly talk about it did not come easily to him. Today, he leads a group that helps others share their experience with mental illness. At work and within his group of friends, everybody knows about his condition, which according to him, is quite helpful because they help monitor his symptoms and behavior. He is also a leader of the Stability Network, an organization that aims to break the stigma surrounding mental illnesses. To know more about this initiative, visit: https://www.thestabilitynetwork.org/ You can watch this interview on my YouTube channel "Understand Suicide:” https://bit.ly/3aV3f79 Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO  Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com  Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:” https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
28:19
May 1, 2021
Ep. 65 - She lost both parents to suicide | Joanna Grace
Joanna has a history of painful losses, including her brother and two successive suicides of both her mother and father. In this interview, she talks about how each member of her family grieved these losses, her struggle with mental illness and suicidal thoughts, and what has helped her along the way. She also explores the impact of racism in her life. She is part of the Stability Network, an organization that fights the stigma associated with mental illness. To know more about this initiative, visit: https://www.thestabilitynetwork.org/ You can watch this interview on my YouTube channel "Understand Suicide:” https://bit.ly/3xcDbOy Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO  Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:” https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
54:26
April 16, 2021
Ep. 64 - She questioned her multiple mental health diagnoses | Jess Fritz
Jess Fritz had her first mental health diagnosis at the age of twelve, after being sexually abused. Since then, the labels that have been attached to her identity include bipolar affective disorder, borderline personality disorder, complex PTSD, and substance use disorder.   As a young woman, she had no hope of having a normal life. “I was raised to believe that I was sick and recovery was not possible. I had big dreams and they looked me in the face and told me I wouldn’t become anything in my life. I was continually told that I belonged contained and locked away from society,” she said.   After a nearly fatal suicide attempt, Jess decided to make changes, which involved taking a hard look at the several medications she had been taking for years. In this interview, she shares with us the many treatments she tried, what worked, and what was detrimental to her health.  Despite what she heard all her life, today Jess is married and works as a therapist in the state of Washington.  She is currently living prescription-free for the first time in her life.  "I finally saw a future and it looked really bright and I got really excited. Slowly the suicidal ideation disappeared and has not come back.”  Jess is part of the Stability Network, a global initiative that aims to open up honest conversations about mental health.    To know more about the Stability Network, visit:  https://www.thestabilitynetwork.org/ You can watch this interview on my YouTube channel "Understand Suicide:” https://bit.ly/3co2Rzf Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO  Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:” https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
31:49
April 1, 2021
Ep. 63 - The secrets we keep | Ted Weiss
When seen from the outside, Ted Weiss' life reflected only a fragment of a complex, intricate picture. When he was in his 20’s, what everyone saw was a bright young man starting a career in law with everything going for him but on the inside, he struggled with depression. The first major episode hit him when he was 28 years old, in a time when there was no conversation about mental illness.   Fortunately, since then, much has changed, and the same can be said about Ted's life. After decades of putting a front and hiding his condition from those around him, he decided to speak openly about his experience with mental illness and the impact it has had on his life, including the fact that he had to leave a successful law firm in Houston because he felt that the stress that came with the work was detrimental to his mental health.  His path to healing included therapy, medication, and most importantly, learning to create meaningful relationships. “I lived the first half of my life in the world of accomplishment, but I didn’t have close relationships because you need to commit time in order to have strong relationships. Since therapy, I’ve lived differently and put a priority into that. Back then, I had nobody,” he says.   Ted is part of the Stability Network, a global initiative that aims to open up honest conversations about mental health. To know more about the Stability Network, visit: https://www.thestabilitynetwork.org/  You can watch this interview on my YouTube channel "Understand Suicide:”  https://youtu.be/Az1wSiPUjlY Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO   Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:”  https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
39:27
March 25, 2021
Ep. 62 - His mental health deteriorated after his father's suicide | Jim Miller
Jim Miller was 22 years old when his father took his life, in 1992, and this is the first time he shares his story publicly. At the time, he was the one responsible to fly to Spain in order to have his father’s body be sent back to the United Kingdom. On the same day, after experiencing the trauma of seeing the place where the suicide took place, he started having his first episode of psychosis, which was followed by a long period of depression. Now, thirty years later, Jim can finally bring out all the feelings he kept bottled up, particularly the anger he felt for his father. “I thought I was okay, but I was probably too proud to get help and probably too frightened,” he told me. Jim Miller is part of the Stability Network, an organizations that aims to inspire and encourage people experiencing mental health challenges to thrive and share their stories. The movement has members from all over the globe. Within the next few weeks, I will be interviewing some of their participants. To know more, visit: https://www.thestabilitynetwork.org/ You can watch this interview on my YouTube channel  "Understand Suicide:” https://youtu.be/39dPZ2_RicQ Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO  Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:” https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
36:27
March 21, 2021
Ep. 61 - She lost her mother to suicide | Katrina Cable
Katrina Cable was 14 years old when her mother died by suicide, but her story goes beyond the pain caused by this kind of loss. At a young age, she had to deal with the death of her father, grandmother, and the rocky road that lied ahead. In this interview, she shares with us how all these losses affected her, the many times she thought she was undeserving of love, and her path to healing.  One of the challenges she faced was to come to terms with the fact that her mother had her own issues and traumas, which didn’t stop her from loving her daughter. “I kept telling myself that she had chosen drugs over me, but now I see it differently,” she told me. I’m grateful for her reaching out and wanting to share her story with us. I hope she inspires my audience to find their own path through their pain.  You can watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide.”  Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO  Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com  Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention"  https://amzn.to/2ANczuR  Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
32:57
March 11, 2021
Ep. 60 - Helping suicidal people and grieving families | My interview to the podcast "Which way?"
I gave this interview to the podcast "Which way?" which I highly recommend. It is hosted by daughter and mother Shari and Jann Simmons. We talked about suicide grief and how to help suicidal people. Find the podcast Which Way? https://apple.co/30b8SZa Watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide": https://bit.ly/3vvQV60 Donate to my podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
49:11
March 5, 2021
Ep. 59 - It's ok that you're not ok | Megan Devine
Every time someone asks me to suggest a grief book, I add Megan Devine’s bestselling book “It's ok that you’re not ok: meeting grief and loss in a culture that doesn’t understand” to the top of the list. It is a beautifully written testimonial of the messy, unpredictable, often judged process of grief. Megan is a psychotherapist, writer, and grief advocate. Her work has been featured widely in the media, including the New York Times, The Atlantic, Washington Post, GQ, Harvard Business Review, and NPR’s Marketplace. Her latest collaborative project, Speaking Grief, debuted in 2020, from PBS. In this interview, she talks about how difficult it is for all of us to know how to help someone in grief. Not only that, but also how to examine our own views on loss. Here are some tips from our conversation: - Practice listening to the pain. People don’t need to be corrected. They need to be heard. - What we do out of our own discomfort. Avoid platitudes. - It’s ok to lead with your awkwardness. We want to name it rather than manage the awkwardness. My favorite: “We can actually change the world just by being kinder and by listening, and not trying to solve somebody else’s pain for them. And by watching for those places where we feel catty about other people’s losses because what that really is is a message to ourselves that we don’t feel supported enough in our own lives and that’s valid.” Find Megan Devine: Book “It's ok that you’re not ok: meeting grief and loss in a culture that doesn’t understand” - https://refugeingrief.com/book/ - PBS documentary “Speaking Grief:” https://speakinggrief.org/ - Webpage: https://refugeingrief.com/ You can watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide:" https://bit.ly/2NKwIsa Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
57:46
February 27, 2021
Ep. 58 - His wife attempted suicide | Adam Buck
This episode is a continuation of the previous one, so if you didn’t listen to it, please do. Mequell’s husband, Adam Buck talks about his side of their story: how he coped with her suicide attempt and all the changes they had to make so that the family could break free from an unhealthy lifestyle. One of the things he shared was a daily fear he had every time he left home. When driving off to work, he would think: “Will she make it?” When referring to daily chores and work obligations, he feels that although he would say that the family was the most important thing in his life, it wasn’t until Mequell survived her suicide attempt that he realized he needed to change as well, otherwise, they wouldn’t make it. “I was tested to see if I would put her before all these other things, and I failed.” This interview is valuable to all those who deal with mental illness among friends and family members. Listen to their podcast, “Thriving with mental illness:” https://anchor.fm/mequell-buck You can watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://youtu.be/ko9kU2l2M1I Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
40:29
February 13, 2021
Ep. 57 - Her suicide attempt was a wake up call | Mequell Buck
Before her suicide attempt, Mequell Buck had always been a high achiever. Like so many other women, she juggled work, taking care of her kids, and being a wife, all of it trying to maintain the highest levels of perfection possible. But her life changed drastically when she woke up in the hospital and realized what had happened. From that day on, she knew then that her priorities had to be reset and her future could not be focused on results and achievement anymore. Mequell learned to respect her own limitations, how to say “no,” the importance of managing expectations, and how to connect with her needs. Such a change had an impact on the whole family dynamics because everyone had to adapt. In this interview, she talks about the process of rebuilding their lives as a unit, and how this transition strengthened their relationships. Next week, her husband Adam will talk to us about his experience through her suicide attempt and mental illness. Listen to her podcast, “Thriving with mental illness:” https://anchor.fm/mequell-buck You can watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://bit.ly/3avo5Ja Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
43:16
February 5, 2021
Ep. 56 - A story of resilience | Shari and Jann Simmons
This has been one of the most inspirational stories I’ve come across since I started this podcast. For the first time, I invited two guests to participate: Shari and Jann Simmons. I listened to them a few months ago and decided that having them together would be a powerful experience for my audience. Shari is a therapist who works with trauma and she does a beautiful job in explaining to us how our brains respond to painful experiences. Then, well, I guess you will have to listen to the episode because I want to avoid ruining the surprise. The only thing I must say is that it’s one of the most moving examples of resilience I’ve ever heard and I feel privileged that they shared it with us. Find Shari and Jann www.thetraumaspeakers.com Buy their book “Which way?” https://sharisimmons.com/book/ You can watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://bit.ly/2Y78aLy Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
50:47
January 23, 2021
Ep. 55 - His job was to approach suicidal people at the Golden Gate bridge | Kevin Briggs
Kevin Briggs has had a life of service: First in the Army, then as a correctional officer, and finally in the Highway patrol in CA, which included patrolling the Golden Gate Bridge, a hotspot for suicide. His job was precisely to talk to people who were threatening to jump off the bridge. He has a TED Talk called “The bridge between suicide and life,” which has been watched for over 3.5 million people. Today he is a mental health and suicide prevention speaker and trainer. For more than a decade, he would go to the bridge and talk to those at risk, something he had never been trained to do. Kevin answered hundreds of emergency calls. In this interview, he shares what he learned about suicidal people, powerful stories of those he saved, what they had in common, ways to approach this population, what to avoid, and how his view on mental health has evolved since then. He also talks about his personal history of suicide: his grandfather took his life, something the family has never discussed. After years of avoiding his own mental illness, Kevin reached his limit and started treatment for depression. In 2019, there were 28 confirmed suicides on the bridge and 167 interventions. Since its inauguration in 1937, over 1,700 have died by jumping off the Golden Gate. Watch Kevin’s TED Talk: https://bit.ly/2LXrbgp You can watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://bit.ly/3itSlIl Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
49:29
January 16, 2021
Ep. 54 - She lost her partner, then her father to suicide | Jessica
When Jessica contacted me by email, she wrote that her life had been “engulfed by suicide.” First, it was her partner when their kid was a few days from turning two years of age. Then, eight years later, her father took his life and this happened only three months ago. Jessica contacted me because she wanted to share her story, a story that was put on hold because of the grief she couldn’t experience eight years ago. “I had to raise my son, to work, to go on with life,” she explained. As it often happens with suicide loss survivors, she was blamed by others, and she internalized this guilt, which resulted in her punishing herself by getting into abusive relationships and substance use until she hit rock bottom. Today, she wants to help break the silence surrounding suicide because she knows how destructive it can be. Thank you, Jessica, for helping break the stigma, and for trusting me to sit with you during such a painful time in your life. You can watch this interview  on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://bit.ly/2XlwXLp Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
36:11
January 8, 2021
Goodbye 2020
This is my end of the year message to you with some announcements for 2021. May 2020 be behind us! Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
08:17
December 27, 2020
Ep. 53 - He is a multiple suicide attempt survivor | Topher Jerome
Topher Jerome has struggled with suicide ideation most of his life and he has experienced multiple attempts. In this interview, he talks to us about the many times he thought he was done with life, including his life-long battle against substance use disorder. After the most serious of his attempts, when he was hospitalized and almost died, he promised his family it would be the last one. Topher says that one of the ways he found towards healing was to use his lived experience to help others. He helped develop Jaspr Health, a platform that is now being used in hospitals and clinics around the United States. In our conversation, he shares some of its features, particularly the video testimonials that allow those who are in crisis to see that they are not alone in their pain. You can watch this interview  on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://youtu.be/EWfo0PimNcw Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
44:59
December 18, 2020
Ep. 52 - Managing chronic pain | David Hall
People who struggle with chronic pain have a much higher risk of dying by suicide than the general population, and my guest, David Hall, knows about this personally. In 2007, he was run over by a driver who was talking on the phone. Since then, he has had dozens of surgeries, including spinal cord fusion and stimulator implants to manage the pain. Because of one of the operations, he developed Complex Regional Pain Syndrome, CRPS, a rare disease, also known as “the suicide illness.” Having learned how to manage his own pain, David now coaches people who experience the same predicament; he has a podcast called “Striving to Thriving,” and he is now finishing a book with the same title. In this interview, he gives us important tips on how to trick your brain so that it doesn’t focus so much on the pain, he explains why opioids don’t work for this kind of generalized pain and teaches techniques that will make a difference in the lives of those who related to this situation. Find David Hall: https://www.strivingtothriving.com/ You can watch this interview  on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://youtu.be/kp4TIR9FXLo Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
44:28
December 12, 2020
Ep. 51 - Healing indigenous people | Eduardo Duran
Suicide disproportionately affects American Indian and Alaska Native populations, especially youth ages 15 to 34, so I wanted to address this topic with someone who has the experience and deep knowledge of indigenous people. Eduardo Duran is precisely that. He is a psychologist and veteran of the US Navy and one of the first professionals to bring attention to soul wounding, also known as historical trauma. In this interview, he teaches us how to address this population, especially when it comes to language. He also explores ways to apply different approaches when trying to help them. “We can’t use colonized thinking to fix the problem it has created,” he points out. Eduardo is the author of a few books, including “Healing the soul wound,” which I highly recommend. Find his books: https://amzn.to/3lIu1SS You can watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
46:28
December 4, 2020
Ep. 50 - Talking to kids in crisis, what to say and avoid | Dr. Mark Goulston
We have reached episode #50, a milestone for all of us and I chose to address youth suicide because the rates have been rising worldwide - today it is the second leading cause of death in the 15-29 age group. I also have received messages from parents who have kids in crisis, some who have attempted suicide so I decided to provide them with practical tools on how to help. My guest is Dr. Mark Goulston, an American psychiatrist with thirty years of experience treating suicidal patients, particularly youth. He was a UCLA professor of psychiatry for over 25 years and a former FBI and police hostage negotiation trainer. He has numerous published books and a podcast called “My Wake-up call.” Find Dr. Mark Goulston: https://markgoulston.com/ The article he mentions at the end: https://markgoulston.com/how-you-became-you/ The Teen Mental Health Webinar he cites in the interview: https://bit.ly/36StBnz If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
42:42
November 20, 2020
Ep. 49 - She witnessed her father's suicide at age 10 | Interview Josephine Hallam
Josephine Hallam is one of those good souls who tries to help others by sharing her story. She contacted me with the wish to give guidance to parents and therapists on how children process trauma. It is the first time she opens up about her pain. At the age of ten, she saw her father take his life, an event that according to her, defined who she was, from the profession she chose - Josephine is a criminal lawyer - to her outlook on life. One of the things she says in this interview is that no matter how much adults try to protect kids by hiding the truth, kids will fill in the gaps with their own narratives. For her, this came in many ways. On the day of her father’s suicide, she was the only one at home. When the police came, little Josephine immediately believed that she would be arrested, that she was at fault. “From that day on, I was ‘that kid’ associated with something bad… I was the one with him and I should have stopped it,” she told me. Josephine’s story is an example of resilience and goodness at heart. By sharing with us her painful experience, she rises above the trauma and the silence that suffocated her for over fifty years, and I feel honored that she chose to do it here, with you, on my podcast. Find Josephine Hallam: https://www.hallamlawgroup.com/ If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." https://bit.ly/35rPKJY Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
57:23
November 13, 2020
Ep. 48 - When trauma happens before speech development: pre-verbal trauma | Interview Suzanne Rutti
We often think of processing trauma through talking but what happens when the trauma occurred before the child developed language? Is it possible to access it? How does it affect development, relationships, and future behavior? These were some of the questions answered by Suzanne Rutti, a therapist in Columbus, Ohio, specialized in pre-verbal trauma. In this interview, she gave us tips on how pre-verbal trauma manifests in kids, things to watch out for, the impact it has on learning, common misdiagnosis related to this kind of trauma, and tools on how to help children heal. She also shared the different ways pre-verbal trauma affects relationships and self-image in adults. Find Suzanne Ruti: http://www.suzannerutti.com/ If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." https://bit.ly/36fVN3z Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
34:58
November 6, 2020
Ep. 47 - Suicide brought them together | Briana and Michael
Briana and Michael’s story is an example of how empathy can break the barriers of judgment and fear. The couple had been exchanging messages on a dating app not knowing that both their lives had been touched by suicide: she had recently attempted and he had lost his wife a few years prior. We would think that as soon as they learned about their shared stories, it would be the end of it, but what happened was the opposite. I recommend listening to it until the end. Briana contacted me through my website because the couple wanted to share their story so that others could maybe hear a different narrative that usually accompanies suicide, which is that it fosters loneliness and keeps people apart. I’m sure this episode will bring hope to many of my listeners. Thank you both for trusting me to be the outlet of your great message of compassion and love. If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." https://bit.ly/3mydZM1 Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
36:31
October 29, 2020
Ep. 46 - Recognizing and healing from shame | Interview Richard Shaw
No one is free of shame and when it comes to suicide, this topic is at its core. For Dr. Richard Shaw, a licensed counselor and a professor at George Fox University, helping people identify shame in their lives and find healing has become a life mission. In this interview, he shows us how to recognize the impact of shame in us and others, the manner in which it can sometimes take over our lives and identities, the differences between shame and guilt, and finally, how to find healing so that we can develop long-lasting, authentic relationships. Dr. Shaw explains that the two main ways that shame is expressed in individuals are: they either get big, which means calling the shots and dominating others, or they get small, which is expressed by wanting to disappear and not be noticed. Both ways end up pushing people away. He also explores this theme within the context of suicide, particularly for those who have to deal with guilt, the blaming of others, and the destructive silence that follows a suicide. “A suicide attempt is the ultimate statement of shame,” he says. Find Dr. Shaw: https://bit.ly/35rYUVl If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide:" https://bit.ly/3ogVv4s Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
50:27
October 22, 2020
Ep. 45 - My interview to "Grief Out Loud"
This podcast is produced by the Dougy Center, in Portland/OR. This institution offers free grief treatment to kids and parents. I deeply respect their work. In this episode, I talk about my own grief and those I've witnessed over the years. I also share about a loss that I hardly ever talk about: my brother's.  Find the Dougy Center:  https://bit.ly/345acj5 Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
39:19
October 18, 2020
Ep. 44 - How much of you is really you? Interview Johanna Lynn
Do you have a feeling that your actions don’t belong to you because they make no sense when you look at the evidence of your life but still, you keep experiencing them over and over again? This is exactly what the fascinating field of Epigenetics explores. In this compelling interview, Johanna Lynn, Canadian, founder of The Family Imprint Institute, explains what seems unexplainable. She gives us clear and simple examples of how to investigate our family history in ways that lead us toward healing.  “Epigenetics helps you get closer to the clarity of what’s right for you” instead of repeating patterns that don’t fit in your life and dreams. These include emotions, behavior, thoughts, and even diseases. One of the most interesting ideas she shared was what she calls the “myth of forgiveness.” Johanna believes that many times, forgiveness falls flat and doesn’t help with finding a resolution. This certainly resonated with me but I had never found the right language to explain why forgiving someone seemed to not be enough sometimes. It may make no sense to you, but then again, this is what this podcast is all about: to provide different perspectives so that we can expand our views on human behavior.  Find Johanna Lynn: https://johannalynn.ca/  Watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
34:29
October 16, 2020
Ep. 43 - Grieving her brother's suicide | Interview Tara Lal
Tara Lal is an Australian firefighter (British born), mental health speaker, and author of the beautifully written book “Standing on my Brother’s Shoulders,” which traces back the losses she has experienced in her life and the suicide of her brother Adam.  As a child, she had to come to terms with her father's debilitating mental illness and her mother's early death by cancer.  While all that was happening, her brother Adam was her anchor, the safe place where she could go to for support and love.  Tragically, the family's losses and his internal struggles were too much for him; at the age of twenty, he took his life.  In this interview, Tara talks about her story, the process of writing the book, and her relationship with Adam. She also explores the many ways in which her struggles shaped her self-image and how she learned to become her true, authentic self.   Find Tara Lal: https://bit.ly/2SG5mSJ  Buy her book: https://amzn.to/3jJYfoe  Watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
48:13
October 8, 2020
Ep. 42 - He lost his daughter to suicide | Interview Malcolm Stern
Malcolm Stern is a British psychotherapist who lost his daughter Melissa to suicide in 2014. He recently published his book "Slay your dragons with compassion: ," which tells the story of her loss and his process through grief. In this interview, he told me that it took him months until he shed his first tears, and only then did he start his healing path. One of the things that helped him was to become selective about his relationship because he noticed that some people would avoid him.  "We are drawn to the places inside us that are not healed. Relationships have the capacity to bring us to healing in the places where there have been childhood wounds that have never been faced," he said. Malcolm also explores the ways in which Melissa's suicide affected his family, particularly his connection with his two other kids, and gives us precious suggestions on how to face our grief. Find Malcolm Stern: https://bit.ly/3n9kIx0 Find his book: https://amzn.to/3juYUK0 Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Watch this interview, on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://youtu.be/uzvikTpOPYs Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
42:42
October 1, 2020
Ep. 41 - He is a comedian with chronic suicidal ideation | Interview Frank King
Frank King is one of those perfect examples of the saying “don't judge by the cover.” For over twenty years, he wrote comedy for the Tonight Show, but while world audiences laughed at his jokes, he struggled with chronic suicidal ideation. No one knew of his pain. In 2012, while talking to an older cousin about their great-aunt’s death, it was revealed to him that the story he knew about her, which was that she had died peacefully, was a lie. When told of the details of her suicide, all the memories came back to him at once. Right there and then, he remembered that, at the age of four, he had actually witnessed the suicide but had no recollection of it. That revelation encouraged him to unveil other family secrets, as well as to open up about his own internal pain. He found out that mental illness is prevalent in his family, something that was kept a taboo, so Frank decided to break the silence. He came out during a TED Talk, and his decision has positively impacted his marriage and relationship with friends. In this interview, he talks about how his determination to open up influenced his family, the reaction he often gets from his audiences, the importance of reaching out, and how liberating it is to be authentic about who he is. He also addresses the toxic culture of masculinity, which hinders men from getting in touch and processing their emotions. As a way to raise awareness regarding this issue, he recently published the book “Guts, Grit & The Grind: A MENtal Mechanics MANual: Advanced Mechanics in Preventative Maintenance.” Find Frank King: https://bit.ly/2HjOChJ Buy his book: https://amzn.to/3csFdjn Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://youtu.be/S18FSjh771E Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
29:12
September 24, 2020
Ep. 40 - Building hope when talking to a suicidal person | Interview John Sommers-Flanagan
I wanted the one-year anniversary episode to be a special one, so I reached out to a person I admire deeply for his work with people who are at risk for suicide. John Sommer-Flanagan is one of those individuals who can get anyone to open up and truly feel listened to. I came across his name when taking an online course for therapists on how to treat suicidal patients and developed immense respect for him. His soothing voice and demeanor touched my heart. I learned a lot and you will too.  With more than thirty years of practice and many books published, John deeply understands psychological pain and how to address it. He became interested in suicide after losing a patient early in his career. The painful experience made him question his ability to help others. Thankfully, he turned it around, and instead of giving up, he learned with it and decided to keep treating this population. In this interview, John gives us valuable, practical examples of how to instill hope in a person who is contemplating suicide. This is no easy task because they are usually in such pain that seeing any other option is a struggle, or what he calls “black-and-black thinking.”  Find John Flanagan: https://johnsommersflanagan.com/  If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel: https://youtu.be/RDmY8kgf6Zc  Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
56:48
September 17, 2020
Today we celebrate 1 year of the podcast
I talk about the things I've learned with the podcast and ask the listeners if they would be interested in having a monthly group to share our stories. Doing the podcast is great, it gives me purpose but it is quite solitary, so I would love to be able to hear more from my audience. Thank you for a fulfilling year and the chance to honor my dad's memory. Check my YouTube Channel, the interviews are there too for those who - like me - enjoy seeing the people I interview. https://bit.ly/3kxXuPp
10:08
September 17, 2020
Ep. 39 - Anxiety and intergenerational trauma | Interview Sarah Payton
Sarah Peyton is an international speaker who applies groundbreaking knowledge of neuroscience in treating individuals. She is the author of "Your resonant self: Guided meditations and exercises to engage your brain's capacity for healing."  In this interview, she explains how trauma is imprinted and passed on through our DNA, which later can be expressed in emotions such as fear and anxiety. Sarah describes anxiety as having two ' flavors:' fear, which most of us associate it with, and the realm of alarm/loneliness. She also talks about the different ways in which individuals deal with trauma depending on which hemisphere of the brain is more dominant, including how the person may respond to suicidal ideation and grief. Find Sarah Peyton: https://empathybrain.com/ Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO If you want to watch this interview, click on the link below: https://youtu.be/fkFIspP5Ils Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
47:21
September 10, 2020
Ep. 38 - Do you live according to your values? Interview Jenna LeJeune
Have you ever felt disconnected from the things that are important to you? This may be a strange question when thinking about suicide, but I assure you, it is central and should be assessed in different phases of our lives because when we are out of touch with what we believe in and from whom we want to be, life feels meaningless. To talk about values, I invited the clinical psychologist Jenna LeJeune, author of the book “Values in Therapy: A Clinician’s Guide to Helping Clients Explore Values, Increase Psychological Flexibility, and Live a More Meaningful Life.” Jenna helps us look deeply into our lives in search of an authentic way of showing up, to reflect on whether or not we choose our paths, and to guide us back when we derail from a purposeful existence. During our conversation, she carried out an exercise that involves seeing my body language and facial expression, so if you want to watch this interview, click on the link below: https://youtu.be/YSyQeXhXp3s Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
36:32
September 4, 2020
Ep. 37 - Healing from trauma even if you don't remember them | Interview Shari Botwin
For many years of her life, Shari felt like a misfit, which was quite confusing and hurtful for her because she could not understand where all that pain came from. She had a hard time building relationships, was haunted by self-doubt, and struggled with suicidal ideation. When she finally decided to explore her story, she sought treatment with a therapist, and what she found out was that she had repeatedly been sexually abused as a child. Her painful repressed memories surfaced but only after she felt safe to open up. “For two years, I sat in therapy once a week and told my therapist that my life was fine and that my family was supportive,” she recalls. Today, Shari is a clinical social worker who treats trauma survivors, many of them with suicidal ideation. In 2019, she published the book “Thriving after trauma: Stories of living and healing.” In this interview, she enlightens us about the ways in which we can heal from trauma, even if we have no memories of them. She addresses many themes from the perspectives of an individual who contemplates suicide and those who have lost loved ones in this manner. FIND SHARI BOTWIN: http://www.sharibotwin.com Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide.” Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
40:42
August 26, 2020
Ep. 36 - What is trauma and how it impacts our lives / Interview Esly Carvalho
Esly Carvalho is a Brazilian/American clinical psychologist with decades of experience treating trauma patients. Her specialty is the technique EMDR, which stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (she is a trainer of trainers). In this interview, I wanted to invite my audience to reconsider some of their misconceptions about trauma because we tend to see it only as something that includes violence. This is true but it doesn’t give the full picture. Esly did a great job explaining what trauma is with many examples from her clinical work. She also explored the many ways traumatic experiences impact many aspects of our life: our physical and mental health, the way we related to others, the fear it imprints in us, and some of the options out there for treatment. COVID-19 was also examined in our conversation. Listen to this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page "Understand Suicide." FIND ESLY CARVALHO: EMDR International Association Her Books (they are free on Kindle): Rupture and Repair Healing the Folks Who Live inside Heal Your Brain, Heal Your Body
42:39
August 20, 2020
Request: Send me your questions
This podcast is for you and I'm sure that one of the reasons to come here is to find answers. This doesn't mean you find them all, so if you do have questions regarding suicide, please send them to me and I will do my best to answer them through interviews. I will never reveal your name, so feel free to ask, ok? Here are two ways to do it: https://www.understandsuicide.com/contact-1 (just click and fill out the form) Facebook Page (on Facebook, search for "Understand Suicide") Let's do this together.
02:40
August 16, 2020
Ep. 35 - How guilt, shame, and religion show up in suicide grief / Interview Tamara Webb (part 2)
This is part two of my interview with Tamara Webb, a professional counselor in Portland/OR who specializes in grief. In this episode, we focus on the impact of guilt, shame, and religion on suicide loss. I also pose myself as a client and ask her a few common questions regarding suicide grief:  1. what to say when feels their loved one's death was their responsibility?  2. How about when the last thing you said to him/her was harsh/rude? Find Tamara Webb here. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Listen to this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
26:48
August 13, 2020
Ep. 34 - When talking therapy is not enough / Interview Tamara Webb (part 1)
Tamara Webb is a professional counselor who specializes in grief. Her approach to therapy is what caught my attention because she doesn't just focus on talking therapy. She presents herself as a holistic counselor, which means that  when clients come into her office, they will be assessed on what she calls the "five bodies common to the human experience: the physical, energetic, mental/emotional and narrative bodies and the body of the connected heart."  In this interview, Tamara addresses how you can move toward healing by paying attention to what you eat and the importance of exercise: "The most powerful thing that we do in terms of any kind of medical treatment starts with what we eat. Health begins in the gut," she said. We also talk about suicide grief, particularly when guilt, self-blame, and regrets are present. How blaming affects families was also explored. Find Tamara Webb here. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Listen to this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
33:52
August 6, 2020
Ep. 33 - My interview to Lori Massicot on her "To 50 and Beyond" Podcast
Lori Massicot has an empowering podcast called To 50 and Beyond, where she invites guests to discuss various topics. I encourage you to check it out.  In this episode, we talked about the myths about suicide, my personal story and how I delt with my father's death, warning signs, tips on what to do (and to avoid) when talking to someone who is contemplating suicide, misconceptions regarding this theme, the stigma that surrounds it, and my mission to help break the silence around this subject. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
49:02
July 30, 2020
Ep. 32 - Dealing with daily struggles: your emotional response may be the natural way to react to them / Interview Dr. Steven Reisner
American clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst Dr. Steven Reisner is a human rights activist; this gives him a very unique perspective on how the mental health profession interacts with culture and society. I start this conversation by asking him whether or not he believes that COVID-19 will constitute a traumatic experience for most of us. Through a social justice lens, he argues that this will depend on our capacity to learn from it and society's ability to mobilize and demand change. Another topic covered in this episode is loneliness. The pandemic has pushed the theme of loneliness to the forefront, but this trend has been present for a long time in our communities. We also discuss the current tendency of the mental health field to pathologize natural human responses to distress, which can be detrimental to the transformation of not only the individual but society as a whole. Dr. Reisner ends by talking about his podcast called Madness, where he weaves psychoanalysis concepts with politics, democracy, and the most relevant topics currently being discussed in America and the world. Listen to this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
27:04
July 28, 2020
Ep. 31 - Are clinicians afraid to treat suicidal patients? Interview Dr. Steven Reisner (Part 1)
American clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst Dr. Steven Reisner has fought tirelessly to improve the ethics of his profession. During more than a decade, he denounced the participation of psychologists in designing programs of torture for the US government, which resulted in a shift in the policies of the American Psychological Association, APA. He is also critical of his colleagues for the way they often treat suicidal patients, which is the main topic of Part 1 of our conversation. In this interview, Dr. Reisner talks about the increased fear of mental health professionals to manage suicidal clients, possible ways to approach these patients, and how the current pandemic has been mishandled in the US.  Dr. Reisner has a private practice in New York but he is currently in France, where he decided to move due to the outbreak of COVID-19 in his hometown.  Listen to this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
38:38
July 21, 2020
Ep. 30 - What to say to a suicidal person / Interview Stacey Freedenthal
Knowing how to help a suicidal person is difficult for most of us. We are afraid to “do the wrong thing” and stimulate their resolve. In order to help with this issue, the clinical social worker Stacey Freedenthal wrote the book “Helping the suicidal person,” with eighty nine tips on how to approach someone who is contemplating suicide. Stacey has personal experience with suicide ideation because she experienced it herself in her 20’s; she also lost friends to voluntary death. Today, she works in Dever, Colorado, treating suicidal patients and grief related to this kind of loss. In this interview, I ask her to explain some of the suggestions explored in the book, not only regarding what to say but also what we should all avoid doing when listening to individuals at risk for suicide. Listen to this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." https://bit.ly/31OE8za Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention:" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Find Stacey Freedenthal’s book: https://amzn.to/2VQVpnr
46:28
July 6, 2020
Ep. 29 - Suicide grief and how COVID-19 has impacted bereavement - Interview Jill Johnson-Young (Part 2)
Jill Johnson-Young knows grief profoundly and from many perspectives. She was widowed twice before the age of fifty; as a medical social worker, she has worked with dying patients; she has run grief support groups; she has created the Your Path Through Grief program, and she is married to a funeral director. In part 2 of our conversation, Jill focuses on the peculiarities of suicide grief. One of the topics we covered was how to respond to those we love but make us uncomfortable with our own pain.  The impact of COVID-19 on bereavement is also explored. According to Jill, the pandemic has been creating layers of trauma in many of us, particularly for those who lost loved ones: "All of the traditional ways of saying good-bye have been removed by this virus...It has made losses so much bigger.. it's causing families to not know what happened." More information about Jill: https://yourpaththroughgrief.com/ Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page:  www.understandsuicide.com This watch this interview on my YouTube Channel called "Understand Suicide" My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR
29:49
June 25, 2020
Ep. 28 - Phases of grief? Interview Jill Johnson-Young (Part 1)
Jill Johnson-Young knows grief profoundly and from many perspectives. She was widowed twice before the age of fifty; as a medical social worker, she has worked with dying patients; she has run grief support groups; she has created the Your Path Through Grief program, and she is married to a funeral director.  In this first part of our conversation, she gave us an insightful view on Dr. Kübler-Ross's popularized 'phases of grief'. Jill also walked us through the need to address emotions after the loss of a loved one, the differences between depression and grief, and her experience with the dying and their families. How can we deal with people around us who are trying to push us to "get over it," "go on with life," and similar messages? What about regrets regarding the person who died? These are some of the topics we talked about in this interview.  More information about Jill: https://yourpaththroughgrief.com/    This watch this interview on my YouTube Channel: https://bit.ly/3fzct8X  Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
25:02
June 18, 2020
Ep. 27 - Her sexual assault led her to a suicide attempt - Interview Catherine Chapman
Catherine is a victim of child sex abuse, and as it often happens with children, she grew up believing it was her fault. There were times when she tried to warn her parents about her contact with pornography but they often dismissed her claims. Later, as an adolescent, her internalized shame and distorted self-image - one that shouted ‘you are ugly, dirty, and chronically bad,’ - pushed her towards self-harming behavior.  Being a pastor’s daughter, she felt that her family had to serve as an example of what it means to be Christian, which often meant keeping a façade of perfection and righteousness even in the face of pain. Her mother struggled with depression although this was never discussed at home.  In this episode, Catherine shares her story publicly for the first time - including her suicide attempts. She talks about how she went from wanting to end it all, including a recent attempt after being sexually assaulted in 2018, to becoming a counselor who helps others process their traumas and find healing. What helped her? This is one of the questions I asked during the interview.  Watch this interview on my YouTube Channel: https://youtu.be/kOpnzau7tt0  Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
33:54
June 11, 2020
Ep. 26 - How can schools be prepared to address suicide? Interview Jonathan Singer
Jonathan Singer is a clinical social worker, the president of the American Association of Suicidology, and co-author of the book “Suicide in Schools: A Practitioner’s Guide to Multi-level Prevention, Assessment, Intervention, and Postvention.” In this interview, he explains how schools can be ready to address suicide in a holistic and effective way.  All the resources (programs) mentioned by Dr. Jonathan Singer can be found https://www.understandsuicide.com/for-schools Watch this interview on my YouTube Channel: https://bit.ly/2UcrJ3n Visit the American Association of Suicidology: https://suicidology.org/ Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
21:06
June 4, 2020
Ep. 25 - The pandemic and its toll on mental health - Interview Jonathan Singer
Jonathan Singer is a clinical social worker and the president of the American Association of Suicidology. In this interview, we discuss how the pandemic has impacted individuals, families, work relations, and communities. He talks about the challenges we all face to maintain a healthy routine, how mental health workers are dealing with the demand, the effect of losing social connection with others, and how to deal with anxiety and loneliness during the quarantine. Dr. Singer is the co-author of the 2015 Routledge text “Suicide in Schools: A Practitioner’s Guide to Multi-level Prevention, Assessment, Intervention, and Postvention.” He is the founder and host of the award-winning podcast series, the Social Work Podcast. Visit the American Association of Suicidology: https://suicidology.org/ Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit:  https://www.understandsuicide.com/ Watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://bit.ly/2M9BYRO My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR
26:23
May 28, 2020
Ep. 24 - She reinvented her life after losing her brother to suicide / Sally Spencer-Thomas
Sally Spencer-Thomas is an award-winning speaker in mental health. After losing her brother Carson to suicide, in 2004, she focused her work as a psychologist to fighting the stigma surrounding suicide.  In this interview, she tells her Carson's story, how it impacted her family, and how she dealt with her own mental illness, which was partially caused by the trauma of losing him.  Sally discusses how suicide affects first-responders, who often experience compassion fatigue, the importance of being open about our own struggles, and sends a powerful message to religious leaders regarding their approach to suicide.   She has earned an international reputation as an entrepreneur and innovator in social change and has held leadership roles with the International Association of Suicide Prevention and the American Association of Suicidology. In 2016, she was invited to speak at the White House on men’s mental health.   Her website https://www.sallyspencerthomas.com/   For more information on suicide, visit:  www.understandsuicide.com   This watch this interview on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide" https://youtu.be/V5rLKYnpskY  My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention"  https://amzn.to/2ANczuR
42:21
May 21, 2020
Ep. 23 - The masks we wear when in pain: he attempted suicide but all everyone saw was a perfect life / Interview John Nieuwenburg
John Nieuwenburg is an award-winning business coach from Canada with a supportive family and wife, but this is only one side of his story. For years, he hid from everyone his feelings of hopelessness, until his depression took its toll and he attempted suicide.   In this interview, John told me that when he looks back, it's hard for him to recognize the man from that past, particularly the person who attempted suicide. "The last 5 years have been the best in my life. Off the charts great!"    He also talks about the shame he felt for not being happy despite everything he had accomplished, the impact his Ted Talk had on his career and personal life, and his dedication to breaking the silence surrounding mental illness and suicide.   Watch his Ted Talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STMp6w38k3g  This interview can be watched on my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide."  https://youtu.be/Ro3iKJ301Tw Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
34:02
May 14, 2020
Ep. 22 - Stigma and mental illness: Is awareness enough? Interview Dr. Patrick Corrigan
Psychologist Dr. Patrick Corrigan has struggled with mental illness all his life and has dedicated his profession to fighting the discrimination experienced by those with psychiatric conditions. In this eye-opening interview, I asked him what we can do to help society fight the stigma associated with mental illnesses, which leads so many people to suicide. He said that contrary to general belief, education is just a small step; sometimes, it can make matter worse. The most effective way is to connect with others who have lived experience with mental illness.  Dr. Patrick has dedicated his life to understanding what works and the misconceptions we have when combatting stereotypes, prejudice, and discrimination against the mentally ill.   If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
39:57
May 6, 2020
Ep. 21 - Childhood grief: how to tell kids about death / Interview Donna Schuurman
In this interview, Donna Schuurman talks about how to open up a dialogue about grief with children. She gives valuable tips on finding appropriate language, how kids express emotions, what to avoid, and ways in which families can come together after the loss of a loved one. She also discusses the peculiarities of suicide grief and the challenges that come with having to talk about this kind of death.   Donna is the senior director of advocacy and training at The Dougy Center, in Portland/OR, a place where families receive free grief therapy and other services. For more information visit www.dougy.org. They also have a podcast called "Grief out loud."   If you want to watch this interview, visit my YouTube Channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
39:32
April 28, 2020
Ep. 20 - Youth suicide: helping parents take action / Interview Norine Vanderhooven
For the past 3 years, Norine Vanderhooven has been the Chair of the Youth Suicide Prevention Committee of the American Association of Suicidology. As a clinical social worker, she has vast experience in treating trauma and suicide-related issues.   In this interview, she helps parents understand the main factors associated with youth suicide, identify signs, and take action to protect their kids.   You can watch this interview is available on my YouTube channel "Understand Suicide" Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide visit www.understandsuicide.com  My book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" is available on Amazon. Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
31:45
April 20, 2020
Ep. 19 - Talking to my sister about dad's suicide
Suicide has a devastating impact on families, especially if blaming is present and the individual ways of grieving are not respected. In this conversation, I talk to my older sister Renata about the ways we see dad's suicide and our personal grieving processes. We go through some of the emotions both of us experienced (or not), such as sadness, anger, guilt, memory loss, and mental confusion, as well as the differences in our views. If you want to watch this interview, go to my Youtube channel "Understand Suicide."  Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO Visit my page www.understandsuicide.com Find my book "Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" https://amzn.to/2ANczuR Contact me and exchange experiences on my Facebook page: https://bit.ly/3h8sIet
26:51
April 12, 2020
Ep. 18 - Grieving a loved one / A conversation with clinical psychologist Brian Goff
Brian Goff is a Clinical Psychologist with a private practice in Portland, OR. In this interview, he talks about the natural responses we experience when grieving, particularly when the death is by suicide.  We discuss emotions, society's expectations of what is "healthy," what differentiates suicide grief from other types of death, and ways to go through it in a more compassionate manner. If you want to watch this interview, go to my Youtube channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO More information on suicide at www.understandsuicide.com. My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
33:02
April 2, 2020
Ep. 17 - Struggling with suicidal ideation / Interview Heidi Lindman
Heidi Lindman has struggled with suicidal ideation since her teenage years, but she has found a compassionate way to deal with them. In this interview, we talk about when these thoughts first came up, their impact on her life, and how she has developed a relationship with them. Heidi says that her recurrent ideation has taught her how to recognize and welcome emotions. Today, she works as a therapist in Broomfield/CO, helping others find alternatives to suicide, as well as to reframe their suicidal thoughts. Click to watch this interview, go to my Youtube channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO More information on suicide at www.understandsuicide.com. My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
30:37
March 26, 2020
Ep. 16 - She lost her brother to suicide, then turned pain into healing others / Interview Mariangela Abeo
Mariangela Abeo attempted suicide at the age of 17. Her brother helped her then. Years later, he took his own life. One of the ways she found to cope with the pain was by creating the project Faces of Fortitude. She travels the country photographing people who lost loved ones to suicide. In this interview, she shares what led her to a suicide attempt, the need we survivors have to break the silence surrounding this theme, and how her initiative has helped bring healing to those touched by voluntary death. If you want to watch this interview, go to my Youtube channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO More information on suicide at www.understandsuicide.com. My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
33:28
March 19, 2020
Ep. 15 - He had given up / Interview Steven Webb
Steve has lived a life of adversity. Some of the struggles he deals with on a daily basis would make most of us question the meaning of life, including being paralyzed from the neck down, having experienced a painful divorce, and bankruptcy. In this interview, we talk about the day he planned to take his life, and what made him change his mind. In his own words: "I have found ways to have freedom, calmness and ultimately peace of mind.  I love my life. By helping you to change your perspective, look at things differently and take control of your life I will give you the freedom and serenity back you deserve."  If you want to watch this interview, visit my Youtube channel "Understand Suicide." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO More information on suicide at www.understandsuicide.com. My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
40:55
March 12, 2020
Ep. 14 - Trauma and the body / Interview Danielle Rousseau
We tend to believe that trauma is a "thing of the mind," but that is not true. Part of this experience is stored in the body, which should be incorporated into one's healing journey. In this interview, I talked to author Danielle Rousseau, who teaches at Boston University and works as a counselor, and a certified yoga teacher. She discusses the many ways in which trauma expresses itself in the body, how to treat it, and the benefits of adopting a holistic approach to trauma-informed care. Find more resources on trauma-informed yoga, including links to online classes, on my website under Resources/Podcast.  Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
41:13
March 4, 2020
Ep. 13 - The US Military, PTSD and suicide / Interview Timothy Wienecke
There are many misconceptions regarding the US Military, PTSD, and suicide. In this episode, Timothy Wienecke - who was in the Air Force for five years and now works as a counselor - talks about the struggles surrounding the military community, how they deal with mental health, myths that need to be combatted, and how to support this population.  For the Veterans Crisis Line, call 1-800-273-8255 and Press 1, use the Veterans Crisis Line online chat, or send a text message to the Veterans Crisis Line at 838255. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO More information on suicide at www.understandsuicide.com. My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
40:47
February 25, 2020
Ep. 12 - Grief or PTSD? Interview Casey VanHoutan
Losing someone to suicide is a traumatic event, and trauma can lead to Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, PTSD, but how can one know the difference? In this episode, therapist Casey VanHoutan explains how PTSD affects people, its symptoms, the various types of treatment available for patients, and how to address it without judgment in a society that tends to rush through trauma as a way to avoid pain. If you are interested in more resources on attachment theory, visit my website and click on "podcast." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
26:12
February 18, 2020
Ep. 11 - Relationships and suicide / Interview Peter Lovenheim
Having a strong support system is a protective factor against suicide, so relationships are central to healing. In this interview, the award-winning journalist Peter Lovenheim, author of "The Attachment Effect" talks about how early childhood bonds shape the way we relate to others. For more on the author, visit www.peterlovenheim.com. If you are interested in more resources on attachment theory, visit my website and click on "podcast." Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
39:36
February 12, 2020
Ep. 10 - Helping suicidal people / Interview Khara Croswaite
Most of us have encountered a person who is contemplating suicide, but very few of us know that. In this interview, counselor Khara Croswaite Brindle talks about the common traits shared by those who are suicidal, how to approach them and build effective safety plans, and how suicidality shows up in the younger generations. Khara works in Denver, Colorado. Her work focuses on young adult professionals, with an emphasis on healing trauma and supporting personal growth. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
36:23
January 21, 2020
Ep. 9 - Suicide Warning Signs
Knowing how to identify warning signs is the first step to save a life. In this episode, I give many examples of the verbal and non-verbal warning signs given by those who are contemplating self-inflicted death. After detailing them, I give suggestions on what can be done in case you believe a loved one is at risk for suicide, as well as the common mistakes that should be avoided so that such actions can lead to saving lives. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
24:56
January 11, 2020
Ep. 8 - Suicide in schools / Interview Marti Diaz Domm
Marti Diaz Domm worked in the Oregon educational system for more than two decades. She describes how mental health issues are handled within the schools, the changes that need to be made so that educators are better prepared to deal with them, and she shares with us her own story involving a loss of a dear student by suicide. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
36:20
December 23, 2019
Ep. 7 - My interview to Cynthia Boyd
In this interview, we covered quite a range of topics. Cynthia Boyd asked me about youth suicide: its causes, the impact of social media, and why it has been rising in the United States. We also talked about warning signs and what to do if you know someone at risk for suicide, especially how to listen to them. Cynthia’s podcast Our Collaboration Station is a space for people to connect and encourage one another to pursue their goals and obtain their peace in life. It can be found on Anchor.fm and Spotify. If you find that you could be a guest on her podcast, send her a message to mywritingsinthesand@gmail.com Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide visit www.understandsuicide.com Or find my book Understanding suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention on Amazon.
36:48
December 9, 2019
Ep. 6 - Struggling with mental illness / Interview Doree D'Angelo
Doree talks about her life with mental illness and how it led her to suicide attempts. In the midst of her struggle, she found people who were understanding of her condition and willing to help. Doree brings a message of hope to those who are at risk for suicide. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
26:26
November 30, 2019
Ep. 5 - Support groups and grief counseling / Leslie Storm part 2
In this episode, Leslie Storm talks about grief counseling and support groups. She also shares the story of her own loss as a counselor, when one of her patients took her own life.  Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
25:02
November 11, 2019
Ep. 4 - Losing a husband to suicide - Interview Leslie Storm Part 1
Leslie Storm knows suicide from both personal and professional viewpoints. After losing her husband to self-inflicted death, she became a grief counselor and a facilitator of suicide support groups in Portland, Oregon. In part one of this interview, she talks from the perspective of a survivor, highlighting the events that led to her husband's death to how friends and family reacted to it. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
26:11
October 26, 2019
Ep. 3 Religion and suicide - Interview Dr. Rand Michael
Dr. Rand Michael is a clergy person, a counselor, and was a professor for twenty-six years. In this interview, he talks about the importance of listening to someone's pain without judgment, regardless of one's religion or spiritual view on suicide. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
31:39
October 14, 2019
Ep. 2 - Losing a daughter to suicide / Interview Mindy
Mindy lost her daughter to suicide in 2017. She shares her grief process, what has helped her, rituals that keep her daughter present, and how her other kids have each dealt differently with the loss. Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
30:46
October 4, 2019
Ep. 1 - My story
In this episode, I tell the story of my father's suicide and how it affected my family.  Donate to the podcast: https://bit.ly/3maL9RO For more information on suicide, visit: www.understandsuicide.com My book "Understanding Suicide: living with loss, paths to prevention" can be found on Amazon.
21:08
September 14, 2019