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Practicing Polyamory Podcast

Practicing Polyamory Podcast

By Practicing Polyamory

Follow: @practicingpolya - Hosted by James Sias (he/him)

The mission of the Practicing Polyamory Podcast is to provide a platform for all of the real life, flawed humans that practice polyamory so that we might all learn from one another and grow as a community. This is a safe space where people admit their shortcomings and failures, celebrate wins, and talk about the hard lessons learned along each individual’s journey through polyam. Be aware, we may not always be able to provide trigger warnings, as our shows are recorded live. As often as possible we will do so in episode descriptions.
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E.71 - Skoliosexuality and Rewriting Autonomy with Anna Baxter

Practicing Polyamory PodcastJul 05, 2021

00:00
29:57
E.121 - Love's Infinite Forms and Platonic Life Partnerships with Jozette Gordon and Seth Hill

E.121 - Love's Infinite Forms and Platonic Life Partnerships with Jozette Gordon and Seth Hill

In this fitting and perfect send-off and season finale, I'm joined by two very awesome fellow podcasters and entrepreneurs who also happen to be platonic life partners. Foxxy Devine aka Seth Hill and Luna Hawks aka Jozette Gordon are fire dancers, apothecary owners, fashion designers, illusionists...the list  goes on! They're also super witchy and fun, and this was a great episode where we got to learn all about who they are and what they do.

Of course get to hear their story of becoming platonic life partners, which began as a business partnership and has evolved into multiple business partnerships, co-habitation, shared bank accounts, and plans for the future. All without romance and sex!

We break that idea down and ask why those types of things are usually reserved for romantic relationships, and how we might open that idea to close, intimate, life-long platonic ones.

This was a super fun episode where we laughed and got deep about relationships structures, and it was the best way to end this first season.

Thanks to all of you for tuning in this year and see you in February!

Learn more about Seth and Jozette by following them on IG: @FireBurnCauldronBubble and check out their podcast and shops:

www.fireburncauldronbubble.com ; www.firemagick.org ; www.magickapothecary.com ; www.slitweave.com

Nov 03, 202140:35
E.120 - Self Love and S.E.X.Y. Relationships with Maria Merloni

E.120 - Self Love and S.E.X.Y. Relationships with Maria Merloni

Maria has been openly polyamorous for the past 10 years and has shared her experiences through multiple media sources over that time. Having heard of polyamory at an earlier time in her life, her own realization that she was polyamorous was like the turn of a light bulb. Maria woke up one day and it hit her right there, "I'm polyamorous!"

It still took another 2 years for Maria to begin her first polyamorous relationship, and she recommends others to take some time to learn about polyamory before they jump in. Speaking of jumping in, Maria and I get into some good conversation around NRE and the science behind the hormones it, and Maria shares that the secret to keeping those feelings of being in love strong is remembering to be in the moment.

Slowing down seems to be a theme for Maria, and she shares how taking things slowly played a role in reigniting the spark of intimacy that was damaged when she came out to her husband as polyamorous, ultimately salvaging her marriage. Maria reminds us of the importance of living in the moment through all of life's experiences--sexual or otherwise!

Getting into some discussion about her coaching practice, Maria then shares what S.E.X.y relationships means to her (Synergistic Energy eXchange), and she shares how people exchange energy not just in sex, but also in other unexpected group activities, such as group meditations.

This really was such a fun conversation and there's a ton of great nuggets through this episode.

Learn more about Maria at www.mariamerloni.com and follow her on IG: @MariaMerloni !

Nov 02, 202133:43
E.119 - Finding Your Flow in Polyamory with Angelica Murphy-Parker

E.119 - Finding Your Flow in Polyamory with Angelica Murphy-Parker

Angelica is a passionate writer who's been writing creatively as long as she's known how. She's in the process of writing an epic, queer, and witchy tale spanning a total of 12 books, and folx...she's already written 4 of those books!! Angelica tells us a bit about her books and her characters, and how her life influenced her story.

Being raised Roman Catholic had an effect on Angelica's view of herself. As she deconstructed her religious guilt, she had to unlearn the idea that, as a woman she was not someone's property, and she had to learn to she the expectation to become a wife and mother first and foremost.

Religious guilt sucks, amiright?!

Angelica shares how she navigated shedding her religious guilt as she felt the call to non-monogamy during covid quarantine, when she discovered that sharing love with just one person wasn't enough for her.

We get a great story from Angelica as she tells us of her proposal, and shares how her fiancé took the news when she came out to him as polyamorous. She explains how her polyamorous identity was one of her many identities, and how coming to terms with different identities gave her multiple opportunities to give herself space to learn and grow into the truest version of herself.

Find out more about Angelica by following her on FB: @GuitiderCreations, and buy her books at www.patreon.com/authoroflast !

Nov 01, 202136:10
E.118 - When Your Partner's Relationship Becomes Serious with Stephanie Symonds-Smith

E.118 - When Your Partner's Relationship Becomes Serious with Stephanie Symonds-Smith

We are lucky enough to be joined in this episode by listener Stephanie Symonds-Smith on her BIRTHDAY, and her bubbly personality shines through as we laugh our way through a fantastic conversation.

Stephanie shares her story and background, including her ambition to become a sex coach and some history on her polycule. She introduces us to her constellation, including her husband, their partner, and a couple that she dates!

Recently Stephanie's husband and their partner have become closer, and Stephanie shares her lived experience as she lived through that transition. She shares how her communication with her husband had to improve even though she is more likely to want to talk about challenges in their relationship, whereas he is more likely to ruminate on his own.

We also talk about how she learned to go against her natural inclinations to pry, and give her partners the space and time to think things over and come to her when they're ready.

This was definitely a fun episode that touched on a bunch of different topics, and Stephanie left us with some great personal stories and lessons learned.

Learn more about Stephanie by following her on IG: @wickedly_stephanie !

Oct 27, 202136:29
E.117 - Privileges As a Man in Polyamory with Albert Thoj

E.117 - Privileges As a Man in Polyamory with Albert Thoj

Albert has been creating awesome content on Instagram @polymananswers, and you should definitely go check him out! In this episode, he talks about how he grew up in a polygenist household, so non-monogamy was always part of his history. Patriarchal culture being what it is, however, it came as a shock to even his non-monogamous family when Alberts femme partners were given the same freedom to have other partners as he did.

The blowback Albert experienced was enough for him to learn quickly to have boundaries. He decided that he did not want to interact with anyone who is trying to invalidate how he wanted to live his life. He learned to reinforce his boundaries time and again, forcing his family to come to terms with not having access to him unless they were respectful of his choices.

After talking a bit about the traffic on his channel, we start to talk about the privileges we have as men in polyamory. Being praised for having multiple partners, for example, as opposed to women who are more likely to be slut-shamed, is a privilege that we as men have. We talk about how living in a religious, patriarchal society sets expectations for men to have sexual conquests, whereas women are expected to remain pure, innocent virgins until marriage.

We chat about what we can do to be allies, in addition to talking about hoe Albert wants to have a positive influence as a content creator of polyamorous content.

This was absolutely an awesome conversation with a truly remarkable dude, and you should absolutely check out his stuff!!

Learn more at albahlove.mypixieset.com and follow him on IG: @polymananswers!

Oct 26, 202133:11
E.116 - Polyamory and Sex Work with Justine Guzman

E.116 - Polyamory and Sex Work with Justine Guzman

Justine joins me on this episode to talk about the intersection of polyamory and sex work. As a sugar baby herself, Justine talks about the work, effort, time, and energy it takes to be successful as an online sex worker. Having and maintaining multiple online relationships is a full-time job, and Justine talks about how these relationships often become real relationships, even if they start as transactional.

One thing that came up during our conversation was how Justine protects herself in her sugaring dynamic, using things she learned on her polyam journey like boundaries, communication, and consent.

Justine warns about how sex workers can fall prey to predators, especially when they enter into sex work when they're hard up on funds. She also shares how some predatory practices, like blackmail, can be used against either party.

Polaym boundaries and sex work boundaries sometimes overlap, and Justine talks about some of the rules, agreements, and boundaries that she uses in both polyam relationships and also when vetting her sugar daddies. Just like in her polyam relationships, Justine requires that all partners are aware of their transactions, so that everyone involved can maintain informed consent!

This was a super fun and insightful conversation that you won't want to miss!

Learn more about Justine at www.stereo.com/gumdropjones and follow her on IG: @beautifulstackofpancakes !

Oct 25, 202130:31
E.115 - Reducing Shame for Healthier Relationships with Sarah Betz

E.115 - Reducing Shame for Healthier Relationships with Sarah Betz

Sarah was one of those friends who was always the listening ear, until finally someone mentioned that she should actually get paid for helping people the way she did! Inspired to social work and helping others, Sarah found that shame came up over and over again in her practice with regard to identity, gender, sex, sexuality, and trauma.

Sarah explains where shame tends to come from (often societally influenced), and things get really deep when she starts talking about the differences between guilt and shame.

Our conversation keeps getting deeper as we talk about shame with regard to our identities, especially when it comes to many of our relationships to religion. Spirituality and a relationship to a higher power can still be extremely important, and Sarah talks about how people are able to take the pieces of the lessons we may have learned growing up in the church, and leave the parts that don't serve us behind.

You won't want to miss the rest of this awesome conversation with an incredible human!

Learn more about Sarah at www.SarahBetz.com and follow her on IG: @SarahBetzLCSW !

Oct 20, 202132:39
E.114 - Shootin' the Shit with My Bro, Hernan Sias

E.114 - Shootin' the Shit with My Bro, Hernan Sias

I almost feel like I need to put a trigger warning on this conversation with my brother, but I was teased enough about the disclaimers I made during the show that hopefully will be enough!

My brother, Hernan, and I are two very different people, and in this episode he shares some of the things he's learned over the past 9 months and 113 episodes of this show. I told my bro about being polyamorous a few years ago, but even though we spent a lot of time doing business together, we never really talked in depth about what it is and what it means.

Hernan talks about the lessons he's learned from the polyam community, including practicing more open communication in his own monogamous relationship as he and his wife navigate raising their family.

We maybe go a little off the rails talking about feminism, making snap judgments, and stereotypes, and he makes his case that everyone is judgmental and uses stereotypes. He even manages to bring the conversation back to polyamory and the judgments our community tends to make toward unicorn hunters, before leaving us with some serentiy prayer level wisdom and a snarky conservative talk show host quote!

Follow Hernan @BusinessBrosPod for awesome business content every single day!

Oct 19, 202132:52
E.113 - Self Acceptance & Specific Communication with Beth Montgomery

E.113 - Self Acceptance & Specific Communication with Beth Montgomery

Beth never felt quite at home in monogamous relationships and had heard of poly once upon a time, but after her second marriage didn't work out Beth decided to be intentionally single for a while and during that time she dove into polyam research and discovered Solo-Polyamory.

I ask Beth about the things that she had to accept about herself and accept herself as a polyamorous woman, and she explains how she had to unlearn monogamy before she could even begin that process.

As it turns out, this interview is pretty pivotal in Beth's journey as it is the first time she has disclosed polyamory as part of her identity in a public forum, and it just happens to be October 11, National Coming Out Day when this interview was recorded!

After some chatting about Brene Brown's obsession with vulnerability, Beth share her thoughts on the relationship between vulnerability and self-acceptance, and oh boy did this conversation get deep!

This heartfelt chat with such an awesome person was so fun and refreshing. I think a lot of people will resonate with Beth.

Support Beth by going to www.singleparentsproject.com and follow her on IG: @butterflybeth !

Oct 19, 202134:08
E.112 - Solo-Poly, Non-Hierarchical Poly, and Just Dating...What's the Difference? with Roy Graff

E.112 - Solo-Poly, Non-Hierarchical Poly, and Just Dating...What's the Difference? with Roy Graff

Roy Graff has been on the show once before, but in the months that followed he has teamed up with several other creators for events and he's now moderating the men's Discord channel for Remodeled Love.

After sharing a few details of his collaborations, we jump right into talking about the differences in solo-poly, non-hierarchical, and just dating around. Roy talks about some common misconceptions around solo-poly, including the perceived lack of commitment that people incorrectly believe SoPo folks have in their relationships.

To get a better understanding of some relational differences, we get into the what makes open relationships and swinging different from polyamory, and Roy reminds us that long-term intimate relationships open the door for more. It's unreasonable to expect complete coldness, and we can't control or regulate feelings in non-monogamous relationships.

We then dig into some things that are important to SoPo folx, such as independence and autonomy, and how those values coincide with being able to offer commitment in a relationship. Roy offers great insight on these potentially competing values, and shares reflections on his own experience while offering thoughts on the relationships he's seen in his coaching practice.

All around this was a fantastic round two with Roy, and a conversation you won't want to miss!

Learn more about Roy at www.openrelating.love and follow him everywhere @openrelating !

Oct 13, 202133:13
E.111 - Mono-Normative Messaging and its Challenges in Polyamory with Alonna Donovan Makinson

E.111 - Mono-Normative Messaging and its Challenges in Polyamory with Alonna Donovan Makinson

Alonna Donovan Makinson was inspired to serve the polyam community when, as a practicing therapist, she discovered an abundance of polyam clients and a nearly complete lack of polyam affirming therapists in her area.

We dive right into the constant bombardment of messaging from all sorts of media sources, and how the "one man, one woman" messaging and lack of representation in the media for the majority of our history impacts all of us as a society at large.

Isolation and lack of social support are just a few negative side effects, especially when our relationship choices might be considered a deviance.

I grill Alonna pretty hard on the idea of deviance, especially where non-monogamy falls in the DSM, and the changes that Alonna sees in expanding psychology education to include non-monogamous relationship structures.

Learn more about Alonna at www.life-tree-consulting.com !

Oct 11, 202131:43
E.110 - The Big Book of Ass with Miss Nookie

E.110 - The Big Book of Ass with Miss Nookie

Miss Nookie is a kinky educator and runs datingkinky.com, a FREE service to help kinky folx find more than just one another; she facilitates kinky folx finding the resources and tools they need for successful kinky relationships!

In this fun-filled episode, Miss Nookie and I talk about her newest book, The Big Book of Ass, and despite a minor giggle fit here and there, we get to some really great conversation around all things anal.

Miss Nookie talks about getting comfortable with butt play, encouraging folx to learn to relax. She explains some human anatomy (did you know we have two sphincters?!), and how to gain trust to allow both sphincters to be ready for insertion.

Next we get into demystifying some of the stories we might hear around anal play, and Miss Nookie gives some good advice for those who might have some messy kinks. She also gives some tips on finding the right toys for anal play to make sure that nothing goes in, without being able to come back out!

We talk about important health implications when engaging in anal sex, especially around the transference of bacteria, and whether any of what we talked about changes for gay men versus heterosexual couples engaging in anal play.

Learn more by visiting www.datingkinky.com and follow on IG: @datingkinkyofficial !

Oct 06, 202134:03
E.109 - My Meta and I Shoot the Shit with Jason Daubert

E.109 - My Meta and I Shoot the Shit with Jason Daubert

In this fun episode, my metamour Jason Daubert hops on to chat with me and see what polyam topics we might cover. We start by taking a page out of the Daylover's book (@RemodeledLove on IG) and start with Jason's privileges, which leads into some great conversation about the terminology that we use in our polyam communities.

I use "partner in common" instead of "shared partner" to describe the partner that connects us, and we talk about the connotation of possessiveness that we're addressing by changing our language. We also dive into the importance of pronouns (another important piece of the language that we use), and some of the challenges we might face when learning people's pronouns, especially if those pronouns have changed in the time we've known that person.

We then jump into talking about our experience as metas, starting with how things have been for him since our partner in common and I started dating. Jason shares his experience first, describing himself as someone who isn't very possessive, but still experiences the FOMO part of jealousy. Then he turns the question around on me and I share my experience of being the new partner, compared to their pre-existing relationship, and coming to terms with our individuality and uniqueness in our partner's life.

This was super fun, and I'm confident Jason and I will do this again soon!

Oct 05, 202136:04
E.108 - How to Balance Privacy & Transparency in Partnerships with Annie Boheler

E.108 - How to Balance Privacy & Transparency in Partnerships with Annie Boheler

Annie Boheler is a Somatics Certified therapist and we kick off this conversation by talking about the importance of having connection to and balance in our bodies, and how somatics training and therapy can help us find that connection.

On the subject of balance, we jump right into talking about what should or shouldn't be shared between multiple partners. Annie encourages us to question our reasons for sharing or asking for information, and recognizing where those questions are coming from--investigate our intentions.

We talk about the communication that need to happen between partners when asking what information can/can't be shared, and how to prepare for the potential of being told no. We get deeper here, when talking about how the person saying no might feel guilt for doing so, and how we can make space to sit with those feelings and be true to ourselves.

Learn more about Annie at www.annielovage.net and follow her on IG: @rewildingintimacy !

Oct 04, 202131:13
E.107 - Harnessing Emotions to Create Meaningful Connections with Greg & Leanne Million

E.107 - Harnessing Emotions to Create Meaningful Connections with Greg & Leanne Million

Greg and Leanne Million have been together more than five year (married for one) after meeting on OK Cupid, and during their relationship they have gone through phases of opening and closing their relationship. Both have had non-monogamous relationships in the past, but they are still imperfect humans with emotions that need to be examined and harnessed. As Greg notes, the one thing that connects us all is our emotions! 

Leanne shares what emotions she was feeling when their relationship began as an open one, and she explains the conversations they had as they came to the mutual decision of temporarily closing their relationship. Greg's superpower is helping other recognize the power of vulnerability, and the vulnerability he showed during this recording was incredible! Greg was completely honest about which of them was asking for the relationship to be closed, and he shares his struggles and lessons learned through the process.

Greg and Leanne explain how we can practice harnessing our emotions rather than letting them take the reins, and using the power of those feelings to create lasting connections through vulnerability, physical activity, and intentional intimacy.

Learn more about Greg and Leanne at www.gregmillion.com and www.leannemillion.com, and follow them on IG: @leannemillion and @thegregmillion !

Sep 29, 202147:05
E.106 - The Curative Effect of Therapy with Kieran Grosman

E.106 - The Curative Effect of Therapy with Kieran Grosman

Kieran Grosman is a transman, kinky, polyam therapist out of ++++ who never had a successful fight with a partner. Every time the first fight happened, it spelled the end of the relationship! Kieran knew there had to be a better way, and therapy helped him learn and implement strategies to improve his relationships.

Kieran shares his experience with dysthymic disorder, what he describes as a continuous low-grade depression stemming from his closeted queer- and transness. Therapy saved his life by giving him the strength, coping mechanisms, and ability to identify with his queerness and embrace authenticity.

The pandemic has made life more difficult for a lot of folx, but one advantage that Kieran notes is the accessibility of more diverse therapy options. He talks about how important it is for queer folx to have a queer therapist, someone who can practice mirroring and be a beacon of hope to let them know they can make it through those hard times.

Kieran also explains changes he's seeing in his practice of more acceptance of trans or queer partners, along with the acceptance of potential exploration through polyamory for the partner discovering their new identity. He also shares two unexpected side effects of his transition, first becoming "invisible" as a masc-portraying person, and second being seen as "the enemy" by the lesbian community he previously knew.

Every minute of this interview had me on the edge of my seat, and Kieran's final thoughts came as a bit of a surprise: a call for gentleness and understanding toward an older generation. You'll have to tune in to hear it!

Learn more about Kieran at www.kgrosmanpsyd.com !

Sep 28, 202130:07
E.105 - How to Recognize if Polyam is Not For Me with Maya Lane

E.105 - How to Recognize if Polyam is Not For Me with Maya Lane

Before anything else, I wanted to make sure that when approaching this topic of "is polyamory right for me" that I was speaking with someone who was accepting and affirming of polyam. Our guest Maya Lane has her own history with the poly life, and she explains all of the things that it has done for her life and why she is completely supportive of those who practice it. 

Maya shares the story of her now twenty-year marriage, a relationship which started out non-monogamous and stayed that way for over a decade. She further explains the factors that made her question whether polyamory was still the right choice for her, including balancing her children, family, career, and multiple relationships.

Tune in to hear us talk about polysaturation, unresolved attachment wounds, and why it's important to work with a therapist like Maya when entering non-monogamy and get the help we need when the hidden, scary shadow pops up in our relationships.

Learn more about Maya by going to www.mayalane.net and follow her on IG: @Maya_Lane_MFT !

Sep 27, 202130:44
E.104 - Practicing Open-Handed Love with Brittany Bannerman

E.104 - Practicing Open-Handed Love with Brittany Bannerman

Brittany Bannerman is one of those people that always had friends coming to her, telling her their deepest darkest, and she found herself wanting to help people navigate their mental health full-time. She's proud to be able to be part of people's healing journeys, and when polyamory was presented to her in some of the communities she was a part of, she discovered that it made a lot of sense to her and she wanted to support people shed monogamy and embrace their authentic selves.

One principle Brittany learned along the way is what she calls open-handed love, which frees us from placing expectations and conditions on those we love. 

I challenged Brittany on this, arguing that expectations and conditions are normal and necessary in relationships, especially in cases of abuse. How can we practice unconditional love when someone has hurt us?

Brittany explains how that works and why open-handed love still applies even in these situations, and even frees us from carrying the pain and anger from pain, infidelity, and abuse.

Tune in to hear what Brittany has to say about these and other topics, and learn more about her by going to www.strengthcounselling.ca and follow her on IG: @strengthcounselling !

Sep 22, 202133:16
E.103 - The Art of Resilience & Expressive Arts Therapy with Tara Graviss

E.103 - The Art of Resilience & Expressive Arts Therapy with Tara Graviss

I've never considered myself much of an artist, but Tara Graviss has heard that from her clients before and it never stopped her from helping them! As it turns out, art is more than drawing and painting, and Tara's expertise is in finding which artistic expression works best for her clients and to use it as a tool to talk about their feelings.

During our chat, Tara explains the difference between art therapy and expressive art therapy, that being who decides the meaning of the art that's being created. She further explains how expressive art therapy is a way to express our feelings without using words. Even if you're the type of person who can't draw stick figures, Tara can help you express yourself through other mediums, such as theater, music, dance, and interpretation.

Tara's expertise is in trauma therapy, specifically for folx who have experience sexual trauma and abuse. For those who have tried traditional talk therapy, expressive art therapy might be an additional resource to explore and heal that trauma. Tara explains the process, often beginning as a group session that creates safe growth environments, later transitioning to private sessions.

For someone who doesn't feel particularly artistic (me), Tara helped me see how everyone is an artist in some way or another. Tune in to hear some tips on how to get started in getting in touch with your body and start to heal from these challenging times!

Learn more about Tara by following her on IG: @theartof_resilience and @theartoftantra !

Sep 21, 202131:28
E.102 - Developing Self Consent with Sophia Graham

E.102 - Developing Self Consent with Sophia Graham

How many of us have even considered what Self-Consent means? In this episode, educator and therapist Sophia Graham walks us through her journey to discovering how important self-consent became to her, and how it can help each and every one of us!

Sophia challenges us to ask, "Who am I?" and refuse to leave that question answered only at the surface. She encourages us to explore ourselves more deeply than ever, bringing all of our various identities to light and finding out whether our identities are chosen or accepted by default.

She shares her experience in consent workshops, including the tea metaphor that's often taught, and how the idea of consent goes beyond our interactions with others and includes our inner dialogue as well. 

Slowing down and centering consent with ourselves, asking more questions about each circumstance, and trusting our emotions to guide our decisions are just a few tips Sophia offers to help us learn the art of self-consent, and that is just the beginning!

Tune in to hear what she has to say about contradicting desires, overcoming social anxiety, and recalibrating the hustle mentality to allow for a more fulfilled life.

Learn more about Sophia at www.loveuncommon.com and follow her on Twitter @LoveUncommon !

Sep 20, 202137:19
E.101 - Why Heritage & History Matters with Tavo Alcoser

E.101 - Why Heritage & History Matters with Tavo Alcoser

Tavo Alcoser is the lead vocalist of the touring band Jarabe Mexicano, whose mission includes outreach to underserved communities promoting diversity and inclusivity. Tavo is also a Latin American Studies major, and with his help I've been able to dig deeper into my roots and heritage.

In this episode, Tavo shares his experiences growing up as a transborder resident--living in Tijuana, Mexico, and going to school in San Diego. He talks about why, despite living south of the border, he didn't learn Spanish until his high school years and even when he did, it was European Spanish, not Mexican!

Tavo talks about his dual identity as a Mexican-American, and how San Diego felt like home for the majority of his early life, and how that changed in later years.

We get to dive deep into what it means to be Chicano, and how we each had struggles when trying to find where we belong in the decolonization movement of Chicano culture. 

This is such a deep and personally meaningful episode, and I want to give a huge shoutout and thank you to Tavo, whose insight has helped me connect deeper with my Mexican roots as I work to create the most inclusive community I can here on the pod!

Learn more about Tavo at www.jarabemexicano.com and follow him on FB: @TavoAlcoserPerformingArtist !

Sep 16, 202133:03
E.100 - It's All About the (Group) Relationship! with Carrie Sackett

E.100 - It's All About the (Group) Relationship! with Carrie Sackett

Today's guest Carrie Sacket practices social therapeutics in the great state of New York and in this episode she explains exactly why social therapeutics uses a group-centered approach to therapy. Carrie explains how, as social creatures, we human beings can find the both the cause and the cure to our emotional turmoil through social interaction.

Within the context of polyamory, the group relationship is of even more importance. Carrie talks about how polyamory is full of people who write their own scripts, and how we can create the environments to have important conversations within our polycules.

Carrie shares some personal experiences within the groups that she leads, and how people are able to learn to sit with discomfort, allowing for greater vulnerability and deeper conversation and connection.

Learn more about Carrie at www.coachingzpd.com and follow on FB: @ZPDCoaching !

Sep 15, 202135:06
E.99 - Adjusting to Living Alone & Solopolyamory with James Sias

E.99 - Adjusting to Living Alone & Solopolyamory with James Sias

I was married and lived with my wife for 6 years until late March 2021. This episode is some of my personal story, where I'm currently at in my own polyamory journey, and my coming to terms with solopolyamory.

I talk about the process of decoupling or detangling for new couples, my understanding of what Solopoly usually means, and whether or not I actually identify as SoPo. 

Much of my life was spent in fear of being alone, but I've learned to become more comfortable on my own and I talk about how I got here (spoiler: hobbies!). 

Follow me everywhere @practicingpolya and sign up to be a guest at www.practicingpolyamory.com !

Sep 14, 202136:43
E.98 - Practicing Nonjudgmental Curiosity with Justine Guzman

E.98 - Practicing Nonjudgmental Curiosity with Justine Guzman

Justine Guzman is a therapist out of the Dallas-Fort Worth area who shares her story of discovering non-monogamy and how it has affected her various relationships. We talk about her progress in being publicly open about her polyamory, even loud about it sometimes, and why living openly authentic is important to her.

Justine shares the many roles that her intersecting identities play in her personal growth, and we commiserate on how our friends, family, and parents have reacted to our polyamorous identities.

In her practice, Justine adamantly embraces and encourages a non-judgmental approach to our emotions. She gives us tips on how we can examine our feelings objectively, like scientists, and how to move past intense emotions and separate ourselves from the situation long enough to get our emotions under control.

Definitely a lot of great nuggets and conversation in this episode! Learn more about Justine at www.stereo.com/gumdropjones and follow on IG: @beautifulstackofpancakes !

Sep 13, 202137:58
E.97 - Creating Inclusive Communities with Kevin Patterson

E.97 - Creating Inclusive Communities with Kevin Patterson

In this episode I have a chance to chat with Kevin A. Patterson, author of Love's Not Colorblind, the foremost book on race and polyamory. Having been tagged in my interviews with Olivia, Kevin felt called to address my comment regarding my mindset of victims and victors.

I have a chance to explain my comment further, and Kevin helps me understand how viewing people by this binary idea is a value judgment based on how much we can endure, even though the problem isn't our strength--it's the social construct of white supremacy.

Kevin talks about how many people of color (including myself for most of my life) try to place themselves on equal footing with the white establishment and deny the white supremacy that exists, but how the reckoning comes for us all eventually (see Omarosa and the Trump administration).

He shares how friends have turned  him into "the scary Black guy" when the need arose, and how easily his image could be turned based solely on how Black folx are viewed in this country.

Kevin and I have an amazing conversation chatting about creating inclusive communities, and he gives me some tips on fostering diversity on the podcast in upcoming seasons, and how you can do the same in your polyam circles!

Be sure to tune in and learn how you can create inclusive communities in your polyam world, too!

Learn more about Kevin at www.kevinapatterson.com and improve your polyam relationships by learning directly from him at www.unfuckyourpolyamory.com ! Follow him on IG: @polyrolemodels , too!

Sep 09, 202138:33
E.96 - My Connection to My Latinx Community with James Sias

E.96 - My Connection to My Latinx Community with James Sias

In this continuing conversation around creating inclusive communities, I share my experiences of assimilation and rejection of my Mexican culture growing up. I tell the story of visiting Mexico as a kid, and my difficulty in taking pride in my Mexican heritage based on my perception of the country, specifically what I saw in the "dirty" border town of Tijuana.

I talk about learning Spanish before English, and being placed in the ESL class in early childhood, despite rejecting the language at home. At home, my dad taught us to reject the Chicano culture that he attributed to the Cholo (Mexican gangster) lifestyle.

That Cholo stereotype is the one that is most often portrayed in the media, and it was the one that I was taught was wrong, or evil. I didn't want to be associated with it, and I learned to distance myself from it.

After sharing my own history with my culture, I talk about how I am connected to it today. I share what I've come to realize about where I stand, including being one generation away from carrying an "illegal" status.

Lastly I share my thoughts on what my life might be like had I been born in Mexico instead of here in the US, and my recognition of my privilege by living here.

Hope you all are learning along with me, and that this helps us all to continue to create inclusive polyam communities!

Sep 08, 202131:32
E.95 - Managing Conflict the Gottman Way with Paige Bond

E.95 - Managing Conflict the Gottman Way with Paige Bond

This was such a great conversation with relationship therapist Paige Bond, who breaks down the worst of the worst, most problematic behaviors in relationships often referred to as the four horsemen.

We dive deep into each of these: criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling, and the antidotes (or countermeasures) for each one.

Paige gives so many great examples of each, and helps us create better "I-Statements" to make sure that we are taking responsibility for our own actions.

We also get into the topic of having a secure attachment to ourselves, which will help us create better attachments with those around us. Paige helps us understand how not having a secure attachment to ourselves may prevent us from being able to be introspective enough to recognize our own needs and improve our relationships in the process.

Paige talks about having an attitude of gratitude, and I share a story about my brother's journey of gratitude that might help you appreciate your partner more!

Stonewalling might be a bit confusing to some (it was for me), and we have a great conversation to help folx understand the difference between stonewalling (avoiding the conflict altogether) and taking time or space away to cool down and approach the problem when emotions are more level.

Learn more about Paige at www.paigebond.com and follow her on FB: @CouplesCounselingCFL !

Sep 07, 202135:18
E.94 - Dismantling Scarcity Mindset with Petra Stone

E.94 - Dismantling Scarcity Mindset with Petra Stone

What happens when we open our relationships and our partners begin to love someone else? If we are stuck in a scarcity mindset, we may believe that love in finite and become fearful.

Petra Stone helps us understand where the scarcity mindset may come from, and invites us to explore strategies to overcome that mindset and welcome a belief of abundance.

We talk about the misplaced belief that attention is equated with love, and how that belief is rooted in fear. When it comes to our partners' attention, we find that a romantic connection with someone other than ourselves can be more intimidating with a hobby (like golfing), but when we give our partners the freedom to seek connections elsewhere, we can rest knowing that our partners never have to choose.

We also get into the topic of consent, especially when engaging in conversation with new people. We talk about the small infractions that wear down our personal boundaries, and how being more aware of what we want can help us to have better relationships in the long run.

Such a fun conversation with a lot of ground covered! Learn more about Petra at www.beginningtherapy.com and www.sentientfest.com!

Sep 06, 202139:43
E.93 - What to Address to Lay a Solid Foundation with Dr. Dana McNeil

E.93 - What to Address to Lay a Solid Foundation with Dr. Dana McNeil

Dr. Dana McNeil is a fellow San Diegan whose journey into therapy was inspired twofold. First, by her experiences as an insurance claims adjuster, where she would play the role of a witness to people going through pain and trauma; and secondly by going through couples' counseling using the Gottman method with her husband.

She tells her story of realizing that being a therapist was her calling, and how she's used her practice to create safe spaces for folx of all walks of life who want to improve their relationships.

When we start getting into laying solid foundations, Dr. Dana talks about how people's relationships are affected based on their expectations. She describes how everything a partner does for us is a gift, which might help us realize that our expectations in our relationships may vary, and our individual views of the world affect those expectations.

Dr. Dana encourages us to have discussions around our expectations to lay a good, solid foundation for our relationships. We talk about behaviors that reflect our commitments to our partners, with the reminder that if/when we do something for our partners, that behavior is a gift.

We also talk about "perpetual issues," issues in relationships that might never be resolved, and how to navigate those issues with our partners.

This was such a fun and insightful conversation that you won't want to miss!

Learn more about Dr. Dana at www.danamcneil.com and follow her on IG: @DrDanaMcNeil !

Sep 01, 202133:32
E.92 - Sharing Our Imperfect Stories with Krista Varela Posell

E.92 - Sharing Our Imperfect Stories with Krista Varela Posell

Krista is the co-founder of @PolyInPlace and she has teamed up with previous guest and friend of the podcast, Claire Travers @PolyPages to launch a book club for the polyamorous community, starting in October 2021. If you are looking for support and to engage with the community, be sure to go to www.polypages.org/bookclub to join!

As a natural storyteller, Krista was inspired to create a community and platform for others to share their journeys into polyamory when she and her polycule hunkered down (like we all did) during the 2020 pandemic.

In this episode, Krista and I talk about some of the books and stories that have inspired her, and she shares her journey of discovering polyamory and working through infidelity in her previously monogamous relationship. Krista shares how she and her husband were able to shed many of their old ideologies, put a stop to infidelities, and successfully move into ethical non-monogamy and polyamory.

Be sure to follow Krista @PolyInPlace and tune into their event, Polyamory in Publishing in partnership with Claire from @PolyPages, Eve Rickert (co-author of More Than Two), Thorntree Press, and M. Ellery (author of A Color Named Love), and Rachel Krantz (author of a forthcoming memoir called Open). Go to www.polypages.org for more information!

Aug 31, 202132:40
E.91 - Leaning Into Difficult Conversations with Rachel Anne Kieran, Psy.D.

E.91 - Leaning Into Difficult Conversations with Rachel Anne Kieran, Psy.D.

In this episode, Dr. Rachel Anne Kieran and I get a chance to chat about her journey through becoming a therapist for the polyam community, and her inspiration to be an ally and resource to those in need.

We talk about the history of psychology with regard to polyamory, non-monogamy, LGBTQ+ issues, and kink, and how important it is that the therapists we seek do not automatically pathologize us for our relationship styles.

Dr. Kieran shares her insights on intersectionality, including recognizing her privilege when engaged with clients, and we talk about our internal intersections, too. She gives some great examples of how we might struggle with our own intersecting personalities, and gives some tips on how to address our own needs.

When it comes to leaning into difficult conversations, Rachel talks about the conversations we need to have on both micro and macro levels, and we talk about why it's important for us to have these conversations not just within our personal relationships, but with the world at large.

Learn more about Dr. Rachel Anne Kieran at www.rkieranpsyd.com, and follow her on FB: @drkieran !

Aug 30, 202131:52
E.90 - My First Polyam Breakup with James Sias

E.90 - My First Polyam Breakup with James Sias

In this guest-less episode, I tell the story of my first polyam relationship back in 2017 and the struggles I faced while navigating my first relationship.

I talk about some of the mistakes I made including treating my partner as disposable, downplaying my feelings with my other partner, and allowing couples privilege and hierarchy to guide many of my decisions.

I also talk about the importance of self-care, and how allowing myself to feel my emotions and release them helped me heal.

Want to share your imperfect story? Go to www.practicingpolyamory.com and sign up today, and follow everywhere @practicingpolya!

Aug 25, 202125:51
E.89 - Breaking Free to Live Authentically with Karine Bedard

E.89 - Breaking Free to Live Authentically with Karine Bedard

In this episode I get to chat with Karine Bedard, a Bible school graduate who found her faith shaken when her husband, a fellow Bible school graduate and her first love, began to question his.

Karine shares her story of finding Playboy Radio and how the authentic stories of the people on that channel resonated with her more than the superficial connections she typically found at her church. 

And so began her journey in Breaking Free, which is how she found her true and authentic community.

Karine's story of conscious uncoupling with her husband, and hear how the lessons she's learned in polyamory has helped her maintain a good friendship with her ex was especially good, and I love how this conversation led us to talking about how polyamory allows us the freedom to explore relationships authentically, and without limits.

Learn more about Karine at www.karinebedardcoaching.com and follow her on IG: @karinebedardcoaching !

Aug 24, 202135:27
E.88 - Creating A Safe & Inclusive Community Part II with Olivia Fermi

E.88 - Creating A Safe & Inclusive Community Part II with Olivia Fermi

In this follow-up episode (check E.84 for part 1) with Olivia Fermi, I've done my homework and spent time talking with my Tias and my Mom about their experiences in coming to America. I share those stories and Olivia guides me into making the personal connection with my heritage.

I recount the story of my family's deportation as children and their early struggles of trying to make a life in America, and we follow the path of their journey to discover how much work, toil, and sacrifice led to me being able to live my life as I know it today.

I also get a chance to share the lessons I learned while talking to my friend Tavo, and how assimilation can be weaponized against marginalized communities.

I'm so grateful to Olivia for guiding me through this process of learning how important it is to connect with my heritage, so that I can better understand others and do a better job of creating inclusive communities wherever I go.

Learn more about Olivia at www.fermi.ca and follow her on IG: @olivia_fermi !

Aug 23, 202143:32
E.87 - All the Ways Polyamory Changed My Life with James Sias

E.87 - All the Ways Polyamory Changed My Life with James Sias

The topic didn't change, but the guest did! I was expecting to have this conversation with someone else, but I ended up talking about this myself.

I've shared my origin story before, so I spent more time talking about the lessons I've learned over the years. I share my journey of being an obsessive, possessive person in my younger years and how, often to my own detriment, I held too tightly to my relationships and how that affected my early polyam experience.

I talk about my marriage and some of our early struggles, how and why I learned that I do in fact want polyamory to be part of my life, and how polyamory helped me break free of some of my other relationship bad habits (like playing the white knight).

Having multiple people to depend on instead of depending on just one person for everything is another huge lesson that I discuss, especially how much pressure I used to place on relationships by expecting to find "The One" person who could fulfill every role and be my everything.

I share some of my current situation, such as coming to terms with practicing Solo Polyamory, and how that's helped me overcome one of my biggest fears and demons: loneliness. 

Hope you all enjoy this little monologue from me! Learn more at www.practicingpolyamory.com and follow me everywhere @practicingpolya!

Aug 18, 202125:02
E.86 - Being Honest Means Confronting Past Trauma with Sharon R.

E.86 - Being Honest Means Confronting Past Trauma with Sharon R.

In this episode we get to hear a very real, raw, and unfiltered story from someone in our polyam community who has seen her share of ups and downs through her poly journey.

Sharon talks us through some of her experiences, including being neglected by her previous husband who perhaps had too many partners. Sharon shares with us how she's learned to set boundaries and expectations in new relationships to make sure that doesn't suffer that neglect again.

Sharon feels that she sometimes leans toward monogamy, and although she acknowledges that one person may not meet all needs, we talk about how she reconciles those feelings with her polyamorous journey.

We get into some pretty good discussion around rules and hierarchical relationships, too, since Sharon and her current husband do maintain a hierarchy and have worked through opening their relationship at a slow and measured pace.

Tune in to hear the imperfect story of someone who is navigating a semi-mono-poly relationship, healing trauma, and making space for love to grow while making concessions to protect her own heart. Thanks for hanging out, Sharon!

Aug 17, 202127:11
E.85 - Asking New Questions Can Change Your Life with Tara Lynne Franco & Andre Turcotte
Aug 16, 202134:35
E.84 - Creating A Safe & Inclusive Community with Olivia Fermi

E.84 - Creating A Safe & Inclusive Community with Olivia Fermi

I had a cancellation a week before this interview was scheduled, so I tweeted out a call (trying to be more actively inclusive) to the QTBIPOC community to fill that spot. When no one answered the call, I asked myself...have a created a space where all folx feel safe?

I expressed my concern to my mailing list, and Olivia Fermi asked me such introspective questions that I knew this was a good place for me to start this journey.

Join me as I learn what it takes to create a safe and inclusive space here on the podcast. My hope is that you'll take what you learn to create safe spaces wherever you are, too! Tune in for part II (episode 88), and learn more about Olivia at https://fermi.ca and follow her @olivia_fermi !

Aug 11, 202131:26
E.83 - When Polyamory Magnifies Your Relationship Problems with Heather Shannon

E.83 - When Polyamory Magnifies Your Relationship Problems with Heather Shannon

Today's guest in an awesome therapist from Michigan, Heather Shannon. After getting to know her a bit and find out why she is inspired to help people in non-monog/non-traditional relationships, we dive into how she might approach a client as a coach versus as a therapist.

We get some great insight into how Heather might help someone who is feeling lost or directionless, and then dive into some of what she's seen and her thought process when polyamory magnifies insecurities and relationship problems.

Heather gives a great explanation about attachment styles, and how they might help someone get to the root of jealousy and possessiveness.

We round out the conversation by talking about the importance and value of self-care and self-reliance, and finding the space where we can be both vulnerable and trusting and able to love openly and deeply, while still taking care of and protecting ourselves.

I had such a great time chatting with Heather and getting to learn from her experiences and share my own. I hope you gain as much value from this conversation as I did!

For more information go to https://heathershannon.co and follow @HeatherAShannon !

Aug 10, 202134:09
E.82 - Taking an Active Role in Mental Health with Taryn Sinclaire

E.82 - Taking an Active Role in Mental Health with Taryn Sinclaire

After a brief introduction and learning about Taryn's background, we start by diving into Simone Biles' decision to remove herself from Olympics competition due to mental health reasons. I have a little bit to say about the "devil's advocate" perspective, but overall it's a chance to hear a therapist's perspective on that decision, and how self-care is important to all of us! 

Most of us aren't even at the highest levels of competition like Simone, but we all have expectations of ourselves and it's important to give ourselves grace!

Some of Taryn's expertise is helping people navigate kink, so we talk about how to bring that topic to overcome shame and have that conversation with your partner, and what to do when that conversation doesn't go so well.

If you want to know how to take an active role in your therapy, how to know when therapy is working, and when it might be time to switch therapists, be sure to stick around to the end!

Learn more about Taryn by following on Facebook @BelleTowerGroup !

Aug 04, 202136:18
E.81 - Breaking Free of Old Beliefs with Joyous Williams

E.81 - Breaking Free of Old Beliefs with Joyous Williams

Joy has a wide range of abilities to help her clients, as she is able to operate in multiple ways. Sometimes she's a trauma therapist, other times an art therapist, and yet others she plays the role of a coach!

We start by talking about each of these roles--what they are, and who best might qualify for each--before jumping deep into attachment theory.

What is attachment theory? What are the types of attachments? How does knowing your attachment style actually help you?

Joy gives a great, real-world example of how an anxious type and an avoidant type might interact,  how to address the potential miscommunication of needs between the two, and tips on how to heal attachment wounds.

Tune in to hear what she has to say about how attachment theory changes when it comes to polyamory, and what triggering attachment wounds might bring up in your relationships!

Learn more about Joy at www.recreatingdawn.com and follow her @recreatingdawn !

Jul 28, 202133:05
E.80 - Transitioning and Mental Health with Arin Brutlag

E.80 - Transitioning and Mental Health with Arin Brutlag

TW: Conversion Therapy Practices (20:07 - 22:39)

In this episode, we get to hear about Arin's experience with questioning their gender, going back as far as when they were five years old and realized that they were not quite fitting in like everyone else.

Their experience with bullying inspired them to work with kids who are questioning their gender, helping kids navigate this oft-confusing path. 

But it's not just kids who need help navigating, their parents often do, too! 

Arin and I get to dive into what the internet has done to help the trans, non-binary, questioning community and how gender non-conforming kids are getting along in her therapy practice. 

We get into some of the struggles someone might face when coming out, and what some reactions from parents might be.

Here's where we hit the trigger warning. 

We talk about some of the torture that people face when going through conversion therapy. Please skip from 20:07 to 22:39 if you are sensitive to this topic.

We finish it up with some tips for parents of someone who is coming out, and get a chance to answer a listener question!

I had so much fun with Arin and I know you will, too! Learn more about Arin at www.renewedmentalhealth.com and follow them @renewedmentalhealth !

Jul 27, 202133:28
E.79 - The Healing Power of Kink with Sawah Danniels

E.79 - The Healing Power of Kink with Sawah Danniels

Let's get kinky with it! Today we chat with Sawah Danniels, a gender & polyam affirming, anti-racist decolonialist therapist operating from the unceded K’Tunaxa, Sinixt, and Okanagan territories (otherwise known as Nelson, British Columbia).

We get into some great discussion on how they Incorporate geek/nerd culture into therapy, and I get to nerd out on Marvel talking about Thor's mental health journey.

Then we jump right into debunking common kink myths, at which point we get into the ideas around sub space, how to navigate around the disconnect that happens during intense scenes, and the importance of aftercare.

We get really deep into how people have utilized kink for healing trauma (TW: we talk about sexual assault), and this is such a powerful part of the conversation!

Last we some of the differences and similarities between dom drop and sub drop, and how people can navigate their scenes and roles.

Tune in to hear it all, and learn more about Sawah by going to www.thenerdytherapist.com and follow them @thenerdytherapist !

Jul 26, 202138:09
E.78 - Polyamorous Parenting, Boundaries, and Consent with Jenna Trostle

E.78 - Polyamorous Parenting, Boundaries, and Consent with Jenna Trostle

Is it sexy to ask permission for the first kiss? We think so! In this episode I get to chat with Jenna Trostle, a therapist based in Melbourne, Australia, and we get into some really deep discussion around consent (among other things).

Jenna shares her story of what brought her to Australia and her journey through polyam, and how caring about the environment inspired her to pursue a career as a therapist.

When it comes to consent, we talk about getting clear on what the connection with a person may or may not be, what happens when assumptions are made (we've all been there), and how to rescind consent when it's already been given.

This was such a fun and valuable conversation and I know our audience will take a lot from this. Learn more about Jenna at www.spectracounselling.com and follow @spectracounselling !

Jul 21, 202134:57
E.77 - Moving from Money Anxiety to Financial Empowerment with Mike Pumphrey

E.77 - Moving from Money Anxiety to Financial Empowerment with Mike Pumphrey

Having my own background in business and entrepreneurship, I was really excited to chat with Mike today about all things personal finance. Mike's approach to financial coaching is based on attachment theory, so we dove into what people's relationships are with money and how it affects our polyamorous relationships.

One big takeway from this discussion is that there's a difference between having real money challenges, compared how much money you FEEL like you have. Emotions around money can be very different, and it's important for people to recognize your own money story.

Tune in to learn why Mike became a money coach for the polyam and LGBT communities, get some tips on planning finances within a polycule, and learn how attachment theory applies to money (are you avoidant, secure, anxious?) plus how privilege affects our relationship to money.

Learn more about Mike at www.empathicfinance.com and follow him @mikepumphreymoneycoach !

Jul 20, 202141:08
E.76 - You CAN Heal Your Trauma with Heather Spreadborough

E.76 - You CAN Heal Your Trauma with Heather Spreadborough

In this episode I chat with Heather Spreadborough, a therapist who believes in you and your ability to recover from trauma. We start the conversation by defining exactly what trauma is, what it is and what it isn't--specifically the differences between grief, loss and trauma.

My favorite part of this episode is how deep we got into the fascinating subject of EMDR - Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. We got really deep into the science of why it works, who is a good candidate for EMDR therapy, and the importance of the trust you'll need to have in your therapist before starting EMDR.

This was a truly fascinating interview and you won't want to miss it! Learn more about our guest at www.heathertherapy.com

Jul 19, 202135:19
E.75 - Making the Throuple Life Work with Dr. Rachael Meir & Kasey Kershner

E.75 - Making the Throuple Life Work with Dr. Rachael Meir & Kasey Kershner

Dr. Rachael Meir returns to the podcast and brings Kasey Kershner with her, giving us two out of three partners of a closed triad.

When they met, Rachael and her husband were looking to find a special connection together, and Kasey had been through a previous relationship that was heavily influenced by couples privilege and was marred by heartbreak.

Tune in to hear about how the trio came together, fell in love and decided to live together after just 12 days, and what the three went through individually and together throughout their journey so far.

Hear about how Rachael and Aaron have worked to deconstruct their couples privilege and invite Kasey in as an equal partner, and considerations Kasey made to ensure that she would not be treated like a unicorn being hunted.

An absolutely amazing conversation with these two amazing ladies that you won't want to miss! Follow them and learn more @triadandtrue !

Jul 14, 202133:52
E.74 - Coping with Heartbreak in Polyamory with Heather Garner

E.74 - Coping with Heartbreak in Polyamory with Heather Garner

This was an excellent episode with therapist Heather Garner out of Towson, Maryland. We covered a ton of great material in this episode, such as what to expect as a polyamorous parent, how kids benefit from having more adults around, and reasons why poly parents might often get criticism from society.

We get into coping with heartbreak by asking how to work through a breakup when children have developed an emotional attachment to partners, and some guidelines on how to introduce partners to our children, too.

Learn more about our guest by going to www.garneringchange.net and follow on IG: @garnering_change !

Jul 13, 202133:45
E.73 - How Experiencing Multiple Loves Has Reshaped Me with @Annie_Undone

E.73 - How Experiencing Multiple Loves Has Reshaped Me with @Annie_Undone

Today we get to hear from an awesome online creator and educator, @Annie_Undonr (Annie Whitman) whose unique style makes her content super engaging and easy to digest. She's on a mission to help others realize that, "You deserve to be yourself."

Annie's done such a wonderful job chronicling her journey and creating content as she has processed her feelings around the things poly folx go through. Things like going on a date with someone new, experiencing NRE, managing jealousy when her partner goes on a date, and coming to the realization that maybe polyamory fit her more naturally, but never knowing it was an option.

We also talk about her recent experience of being unwittingly outed to family, the fallout she's experiencing, and how she's coping with the family members with whom she wants to maintain relationships.

We had so much fun chatting, and there's a lot of great nuggets in this episode, so don't miss out! Learn more and follow Annie on IG/Reddit: @Annie_Undone !

Jul 07, 202135:31
E.72 - Normalizing Intentional Mental and Sexual Health with Maria Carrington

E.72 - Normalizing Intentional Mental and Sexual Health with Maria Carrington

Okay, so this was fun! There was a scheduling snafu that ended up with me starting on one topic and shifting gears 4 minutes in when our guest, Maria Carrington, popped in!

Maria has developed a course intended to teach therapists about kink and BDSM, and demystifying the belief that these practices are at the root of mental health problems (they're not). We talk about the questions you might want to ask your therapist to make sure they're sex positive and affirming, recognizing biases that your mental health professional might be carrying, and what may or may not be included in the psychology bible, aka the DSM-V.

Learn more about our guest at www.nwsextherapy.com!

Jul 06, 202134:43