Divorce Proof Marriage

This episode features answers to questions that followers and podcast listeners have sent in.

The first question is basically asking if validation feels fake instead of calming and connecting, how do you approach validating your partner (who is most likely avoidant)?

The second question asks if marriage is "just a piece of paper" and how to avoid divorce if you're engaged but terrified of the possibility.

The third question is from a man asking if he should stay in his marriage or leave as he and his wife have a lot of trauma from the past and keep hurting each other.

Chapters:

0:00 Intro and Appreciation for listeners

15:32 Marriage is more than just a piece of paper

38:52 The continuous effort and growth in marriage

Contact Kameran:

Email: coaching@recognizingpotential.com

Website: www.recognizingpotential.com

FB, IG, TicTok- @divorce.proof.marriage

In this episode, I talk about a new course that I've just launched on learning to manage emotions, notice, name and share them and how to get signed up for that.

The meat and potatoes of the episode is all about the three things your marriage needs to thrive according to Dr. John Gottman and his many years of research on the subject. I break down those three into the visual of a house consisting of trust, commitment and friendship. I talk about how to build all three and how you may be damaging them consciously or unconsciously.

Individual topics talked about on this episode are:

Accepting your partner's influence, building and losing trust, treating your partner as your friend, consistency in relationships, seeing your partner in a positive light versus focusing on the negative light, avoidant behavior with emotions and pulling away in a relationship, setting boundaries, the value of trust, and letting your partner into your world. I recap stories of real life examples from coaching clients as well as my own relationship with my ex-husband and what went wrong in our marriage.

Don't forget to leave a review and follow me on IG or FB @divorce.proof.marriage

If you would like to collaborate, sign up for coaching or become a sponsor of the podcast, please email Kameran at coaching@recognizingpotential.com

Is Mental Load just a buzzword? Why is it important in a marriage/relationship? Why is it so overwhelming to the default partner/parent? What are some examples of minimum standard care? Why is understanding the whole process of conceiving the plan, planning the plan and executing the plan a big deal? Why is my partner pissed all the time? Why won't my partner have sex with me? This is why!

If at any point you're stressed out by all the questions I'm asking in this episode, this is exactly what is going through your partner's mind at any point of the day.

If you're wanting to do an Equal Partnership Assessment, please email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com to schedule and get payment links. Remember those sessions are 60 minutes for an assessment and coaching session on how to create a more equal partnership. We will create a strategy that works for your family together. $100 (at the time of the recording. I can't guarantee that price won't increase in the future.)

To get $10 off your first order of Amare supplements: https://amare.com/en-us/g10/145624

If you want to donate financially to the podcast, venmo @ Kameran-Thompson or Cashapp @ $KameranThompson

In this episode, I talk in depth about the five needed attributes to really appreciate your spouse.

Do you truly accept your partner for who they are or only for who you want them to be?

Do you understand their heart? Do you know them well enough to understand their intentions versus their impact?

Do you affirm your spouse enough? Do you appreciate and affirm them for who they are or only what they do?

Are you completely honest and authentic with your partner? Do you have secrets and lies that you're wasting energy worrying if you'll be found out? Do you open up enough that your partner can fully know, accept and love you?

Do you truly forgive them for their wrongdoings, or do you rise above them and have contempt rather than true forgiveness?

Don't skip the end! I talk about the marriage retreat that I'm planning that will be in Granbury, TX August 2-3, 2024. Early bird pricing is now!

To find out more about coaching, book your spot for the retreat, ask questions or give Kameran ideas for the podcast that you may want more info on, email coaching@recognizingpotential.com

IG and FB @divorce.proof.marriage

To donate monetarily to the podcast: Venmo @Kameran-Thompson

Cashapp: $KameranThompson

To donate financially to the podcast:

Venmo: @Kameran-Thompson

Cashapp: $KameranThompson Stress or worry cloud our daily lives, preventing us from enjoying the quality of relationships we want. This anxiety can lead to missed moments, becoming overly reactive, and a sense of isolation from the ones we care about most. But the solution is not to ignore or suppress these feelings. And simply “trying harder” using willpower never works. If you want a more present, joyful, and connected 2024, real solutions exist to leave anxiety behind.

In this episode, I interview Trevor Justice is a relationship coach specializing in anxious attachment relationship skills, as well as the author of Attract Love and Respect: 5 Ways to Be Valued in Your Relationships. He works to give people-pleasers and folks with anxious attachment styles effective language, skills, and confidence to express their needs and set boundaries, which demonstrates higher value and leads others to appreciate them more. Trevor’s mission is to help anxiously attached people feel more secure, become priorities to their partners, and receive as much as they give.

Trevor coaches me a little bit through anxious attachment triggers and scenarios. We share a few personal stories of our own anxious attachment experiences and I ask Trevor to give tips and talk deeply about how to overcome an anxious attachment and become secure. Trevor discusses self-respect, how to overcome people pleasing and develop a secure attachment within your relationship.

www.attractlove.com for your free gift from Trevor and his team!

To get in touch with Kameran:

IG: @divorce.proof.marriage

Email: coaching@recognizingpotential.com

Website: www.recognizingpotential.com

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Kate Evans has spent twenty years empowering women to see their true self that is hiding under their fears, shame, perfectionism, and unrealistic expectations. 

Her aim is to help you see yourself clearly for the first time. All of the answers you're looking for are inside of you already. But she knows how hard it is to find them on your own with all of that other noise getting in the way. 

Her job is to help you quiet down all of those crappy thoughts so you can see what she already knows about you. 

She's here for you as a guide, confidant, and accountability partner. She wants to honor the unique woman you are, instead of asking you to mold yourself into someone else's idea of what you or your home should look like. 

In 2018, she had a life-changing experience when she dove in and decluttered her own home. The experience showed Kate the connection between self-care and a healthy home. 

That was when she knew she had to help other women feel the pride and relief she felt. 

She found power and strength in herself when she took control of her home. She got over her "own shit" and stopped believing she was "just a slob", which was the thought that had held her back her entire life. 

Kate's goal is for you to find your version of that story. To stop hiding behind limiting beliefs and grab onto the life and home you deserve!

As a trained psychologist and life coach, Kate has a unique perspective on decluttering your home that is about you and your journey, not just the stuff in your home.

With her empathic and solution-focused approach to decluttering, and your commitment to yourself, you're finally going create sustainable change.

In this episode, we break down the limiting beliefs that may be lies that are holding you back from becoming your best self with an organized mind, home and life. Kate and I talk about how decluttering your home can and will lead to a more fulfilling marriage and parent/child relationship if you have kids. We talk about the grief that comes with cleaning out a deceased loved one's home and many more topics around decluttering.

Kate tells you how to get started, how to go about decluttering, secrets to being successful once you start decluttering your home and if you get stuck, she's right there to coach you by contacting her to get started!

www.soulfulspacecoaching.com/newsletter

www.soulfulspacecoaching.com

IG: @soulfulspace.coaching

For marriage coaching with Kam:

www.recognizingpotential.com

coaching@recognizingpotential.com

IG: @divorce.proof.marriage

If you are a supporter of this show, Kameran and her production team appreciate you immensely!

If you'd like to become a supporter of the show- Venmo- @Kameran-Thompson

Cashapp- $KameranThompson

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Does your marriage feel stale, disconnected, like there isn't any depth to it anymore? Most likely, it's because you're only having 2 of these 6 types of conversations every week. In this short episode, you will learn all about

• the types of conversations
• the proper 5 finger apology
• resources to spice up your marriage and your time in the bedroom
• the most important part of conflict

For more info on the monthly membership email coaching@recognizingpotential.com

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Code for 50% off your first date box: DIVORCEPROOFMARRIAGE

For 1:1 coaching: email coaching@recognizingpotential.com

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venmo @Kameran-Thompson

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Blending a family can be one of the hardest things you can do. Nobody actually knows what they're signing up for, how to get the kids to listen and respect the step-parent and it can create a lot of conflict between partners. So what's the secret? Brittney P, a certified step-parent coach and teacher breaks it down and talks about resentment, boundaries, how to navigate the waters of blending smoothly, how to get rid of the shame that comes with all the feelings of being a step-parent and how to find joy in the process. If that sounds like something you need help with, give this episode a listen! Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review!

To connect with Brittney:

www.blendingbravely.com

IG: itsmebrittneyp

To connect with Kameran:

www.recognizingpotential.com

IG: divorce.proof.marriage

FB: www.facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential

If you are a donor for the podcast:

Venmo: @Kameran-Thompson

Cashapp: $KameranThompson

***TRIGGER WARNING: ADDICTION & ABUSE ***

Today's episode was a solo episode answering questions that people sent in asking for coaching around different topics, questions, or scenarios they need help with.

1:30- A question regarding alcohol abuse and how it impacts every part of their marriage. I talk about how addiction of any kind breaks down trust. In my coaching, I use Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs and the Gottman method The Sound House example. In order to have a healthy marriage, trust must be established. If it's not, safety is not created and this blocks emotional connection, emotional intimacy, physical intimacy, the ability to be vulnerable, etc. Thus, addiction does, in fact, impact almost every part of the marriage.

20:23- The topic of discussion was sent in by someone wanting to know about emotional abuse. I talk about my own experience with being emotionally, physically, mentally and financially abused. I talk about how it looks in a relationship, examples, how it feels, how easy it is to judge someone who is being abused if you've never been abused yourself. I talk about what the abuse does to the victim and what to do about it.

40:31- The topic of codependency is brought up and discussed regarding how it is created, what it looks like and how to become more interdependent and less co-dependent.

Email any questions or additional Mailbag Monday topics or questions to coaching@recognizingpotential.com

If you are looking to sponsor the podcast, please email coaching@recognizingpotential.com

If you are looking to donate to the podcast, please venmo @Kameran-Thompson or cashapp $KameranThompson

Follow me on IG @divorce.proof.marriage

***TRIGGER WARNINGS: SUICIDE, ALCOHOLISM*** Todd & Kelcey Postlewait are former coaching clients of mine that came to me in the fall of 2022 needing radical transformation. They were hours away from filing for divorce and knew that they couldn't continue with the emotional rollercoaster they'd been on for years. They didn't want to continue the legacy they had started for their son. They wanted a healthy marriage but didn't have the next steps to make it happen. They wanted each other, wanted their marriage but not that version of their marriage. They wanted peace, harmony, and most of all, they wanted to not only like each other but to truly be in love with each other again. I worked with Todd and Kelcey consistently, every week for 6 months, only taking off for holidays. They showed up. They did the work in between sessions. They did the growth work, even if they didn't like it. They were consistent about prioritizing their marriage. As a result, they changed their habits, broke generational curses, set boundaries, and changed their entire lifestyle. I met them where they were and in the very first session, we talked about where they wanted to go. I gave them the tools and taught them how to get there. They've been on their own for about 6 months now and as you'll hear in the episode, they are truly thriving. Todd and Kelcey are not celebrities. They are a married couple, living in Kentucky, raising kids and working jobs just like you and me. They have an exceptional marriage because they've built it. They have the life they want because they consistently work toward creating that life. This is their story. If you would like Todd and Kelcey to speak for your foundation or organization, please reach out to Todd at todd.postlewait@gmail.com If you're interested in coaching for your own marriage or booking Kameran for a marriage conference, please reach out to coaching@recognizingpotential.com

Venmo @Kameran-Thompson

Cash App: $KameranThompson

If you're interested in purchasing a sponsorship ad, please email coaching@recognizingpotential.com

Maggie Chapman is an academic advisor at CU Boulder, a pilot wife and a mom of two. As a passion project, she became a sleep specialist with Rocky Mountain Sleeping Baby and found her life's calling. Not only did Maggie help our family personally when Zayn was 16 months old and had never slept well, she's helped hundreds of other families teach their children to sleep and sleep well whether they were infants or well into their elementary school years.

Sleep is an essential part of helping a person thrive whether they are a child or an adult. It is a basic physiological need. In this episode, Maggie talks a lot about how to get more sleep as the parent during the season of having a little one, getting your child to get more sleep, postpartum depression and how to cope, how a partner can help with a newborn's sleep patterns, and how to thrive when you're barely able to survive during this time. Maggie and I are both married so we talk a lot about marriages when you have little ones and how to keep that spark alive, the seven year itch, and how to work as a team when you have kids.

Maggie is an absolute angel and so great to work with! You can find her on Instagram @maggiemchapman or Kandra and the whole team on Instagram @rockymountainsleepingbaby

Tell them Kameran sent you. They won't be surprised. I've sent so many clients to them already and all of them have been helped and have better sleeping households!

If you're interested in getting 50% off your first date box with Happily, go to www.thehappily.co, customize your date box and enter the code DIVORCEPROOFMARRIAGE for 50% of your first month's box!

If you're ready to connect your marriage and build a legacy worth leaving to your kids- connect with me on Instagram @Divorce.proof.marriage or email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com to get more information on coaching.

In this episode, we are talking about pride. Pride is not just the arrogant "look at me, see me, respect me, love me" boastful kind. It also includes fear. I give you examples of what pride looks like in your marriage, how it shows up, what it does and how it deteriorates your marriage, and how to eliminate the problem. I get very real and raw about my own marriage giving you examples of what my husband did and how he showed up, what I did, how I messed our marriage up and, in the episode, I show you what it looks like to take accountability when you blow it. I give you the three A's to remember in order to let go of your own pride.

If this episode resonates with you, please leave a review and share to your own social platforms. Don't forget to tag me @divorce.proof.marriage and if you have any questions or are interested in private marriage coaching for you and your partner, DM or email me the word LINK to coaching@recognizingpotential.com

FB coaching group: www.facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential

IG: @divorce.proof.marriage

For THE DATE BOX- go to www.thehappily.co to customize your date box. Code for 50% off your first month: DIVORCEPROOFMARRIAGE

Kevin & Bree Bailey spent $100, 000 on a divorce only to reconcile in the final moments of said divorce. They tell their story, how they went from divorcing and a nasty deposition to helping couples restore their marriage! They talk about their walks with God, how God is first in their marriage and marriages are truly under attack right now. What happens when you separate marriages? What's causing such a decline in dating and remarriage after divorce? We talk in depth about the steps needed to restore your marriage, even if you're the only one working on it. The episode dives into what wives and husbands do and don't do that cause hurt and problems in marriages. We talk a lot about how Bree and Kevin have shaped their marriage into having a legacy worth leaving now so you can do the same.

This episode is heavily based on Biblical principles and it is the opinion of Kameran, Kevin and Bree. This episode is for this world but not of this world. #IYKYK

If you are interested in coaching with Kameran, email coaching@recognizingpotential.com.

For coaching with Kevin or Bree- email kevin@reverencerestored.com or bree@reverencerestored.com

Joy Harrington is a life coach, wife, mom and overall incredible human being! She has the best fashion sense too!

**TRIGGER WARNINGS AHEAD** (Infant loss, infidelity)

On today's episode, we start out talking about the infidelity her marriage endured. For 9 months she laid on the couch wallowing in misery, negativity and doubt. Then she got real with herself, got up and started working on herself. She and her husband, Peter, went to counseling, then marriage coaching, and started to grow and thrive together. She tells her story of getting pregnant with their third child, Sterling, and losing him one day after he was born. She gives so many great tips on how they stopped merely surviving and started thriving as a couple.

Next, Joy and I get into masculine and feminine energies- how to know which one you're in, how to slide back into the one you want to be in and what happens when you're not meshing well with your partner energetically. We talk about conflict cycles as it pertains to our energetic polarity and how to deal with marriage if your partner is gone a lot or is reintegrating back into home life after having been gone.

Lastly, we talk about homeschooling, traveling and how to stop settling for "good enough" and create a life you can truly be proud of, happy and fulfilled by and not in comparison to others.

If any of what Joy has to say today ignites your soul like it has mine, you can follow her on IG @joyharrington.ig

If you're interested in The Resentment Trap program she references in the podcast, the website is www.levelupbabe.com/thelevelupclub

If you're interested in marriage coaching and working through the struggles in your marriage, email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com.

Follow me on IG @divorce.proof.marriage or on FB at www.facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential

I recently polled my instagram followers on whether they repaired after an argument or just moved on with or without an apology from either side. 76% of the votes said they just moved on. 

The reason this is concerning is that the repair is the most important part of the argument and it's missing in the majority of marriages.

Repairing is fostering the connection between you and your partner after the argument so there is less negativity, resentment and lingering feelings or unmet expectations. Every time you repair after conflict, you're laying another brick in the foundational elements that help you handle larger conflict down the road. You're bringing your marriage back together.

After the argument when you've both calmed down, met your basic needs (sleep, water, food), are no longer in a defensive state and can listen to each other's point of view so you can understand, not just respond, you're ready to repair. 

Come together to have a conversation about what happened. Using an I statement "I felt (emotion word) when (circumstance) because (why did it trigger you). I need _________ to move forward. 

Using I statements helps you focus on you. This is important because every time there is a conflict, both parties have a hand in it. We can't change our partner, so we have to change our own behavior. If done correctly, it takes away criticism, blame and shame of your partner.

After both sides have given their perspective, talk calmly about the disconnect that happened. Was it a miscommunication? Was there an assumption that was made (or many assumptions)? Apologize for your part in the disconnect and if possible, help your partner get the need met that they stated in their I statement. Forgive and move forward after both of you feel reconnected.

• The goal here is to approach this with a solution-oriented attitude.
• Communication is 58% body language, 35% tone and 7% words. Make sure your body language and your tone are sending the same message your words are.
• Give your partner the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes this is harder than others, especially if you're dealing with a reoccurring cycle (in which case, I would suggest getting help). Remember that this is your partner who loves you, not your enemy and you're in this to understand and do things differently, not to judge and condemn.
• Take a break if needed but you must come back and try again later. This isn't going to be perfect every single time. My husband and I have started to repair many times only to find that we aren't as calm as we thought or one of us says something that triggers the other again and we have to come back later and repair both conflicts. 
• Disconnection is not caused by conflict. Conflict is caused by disconnection. The whole purpose of the repair is to bring that connection back together, not widen the gap. Keep things calm, low in tone, slow in process, and focus on building each other back up. There is no scorecard in connected marriages.

Email: coaching@recognizingpotential.com

IG: @divorce.proof.marriage

Facebook: facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential

In this episode, I dig deep into some hard truths about saving your marriage. If you're looking for a place to start in changing the dynamic of your marriage, this is a great starting place. All of the advice that I give you are things I've done in my marriage or ideas I've given my clients and watched it work well in theirs. 

Some of the topics I address in this podcast episode are decision and commitment, freedom, disrespect, anger, attitude, leadership in men, what it means to be the man of the house, respect, fight styles, taking responsibility for what you can control, and so much more! 

At the time of this recording, I had one spot open immediately. That has filled and one spot starting in September has filled but I do still have one more spot for 1:1 couples coaching starting in September. You can email me with any questions- coaching@recognizingpotential.com

You can also follow or tag me @divorce.proof.marriage on IG or Tiktok

You can also join my free facebook coaching group at www.facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential

Today's episode is all about the popular marriage advice we get from all those who have gone before us. 

When I got married the first time, I remember sitting in a circle while we passed around index cards and ladies wrote their best advice on the cards. So many pieces of advice were fantastic. So many of them weren't. So we're going to dive into a few of those "common pieces of marriage advice".

1. "Never go to bed angry."

2. Marriage is 50/50

3. "Stay together for the children."

4. "Just pray about it."

5. "Passion fades over time."

6. Communicate

7. Offering hope as a strategy. “Don’t worry, it’ll get better.”

8. Just get divorced/you deserve better. 

9. What they don’t know won’t hurt ‘em.

10. If you disagree and argue a lot, you’re probably just not compatible anymore. 

Any of these sound familiar? If so, you've probably been given some bad advice. Find out how to flip that script or the mindset around that advice to make it applicable to your marriage. As always, if you have questions, want to work with me or collaborate, email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com

Also make sure you're following me on instagram @divorce.proof.marriage and in my facebook group www.facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential.com

Of course you've heard about love languages. Who hasn't? But in this episode, I'm breaking each of the love languages down one by one on how to speak them and what to avoid because it hurts the person with that love language more so than those without it. Did you also know that kids have certain love languages? They absolutely do and it's one of the reasons we may not have felt loved as a child because we didn't get our love languages spoken. Dr. Gary Chapman came out with the research and a few books on the Love Languages. If you need to find out your love language, head on over to his website where you and your partner can each take a quiz to find out which is your primary and your secondary love languages. 

https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language

Then come right back here to hear all about yours and your partner's! 

The love languages are all discussed in the episode in this order: 

Acts of Service

Words of Affirmation

Physical Touch

Gifts

Quality Time

I would recommend taking notes on your love languages as well as your partner's for easy reference in the future. Need more info but pressed for time, head over to my IG and read all about the love languages @divorce.proof.marriage or you can find the info in my private facebook coaching group www.facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential

Before I was a marriage coach, I was a teacher. This episode is for all the kids I've taught over the years but especially for the class of 2022 as I taught them in Kindergarten and then looped with them and taught them in 1st grade too. They graduated high school a couple weeks ago so here's a dozen pieces of advice for them. If you're 30 or 40 and listening, this advice applies to you too! 

1. The friends you make in college will most likely be friends you'll have forever. Choose wisely as they will be who push you up and help you create success or drag you down. 

2. Travel! Nothing opens your eyes and changes you for the better than seeing other cultures, geographic region and experiencing life outside your comfort zone. 

3. Don't worry if you have to change your major. Figure out what you're passionate about and how to monetize that so you aren't changing it 11 times like me. Go into college and major in what fits the definition of success for YOU, not because you're living into other people's definitions of success. 

4. If money, age and time weren't an issue, who would you be? What does your best self look like? Define success, independence, love, passion, career, and rich for yourself. What do those look like specifically? 

5. Knowledge and Connections will monetize repeatedly. Money spends once.

6. When you get lost or feel like your life is spinning out of control, go back to the basics. Go back to your roots and your hometown. It will keep you grounded, humble and help center you.

7. Wait to get married! Your spouse will determine 90% of your happiness in your life. Write out what you want in a spouse, get help from people you love and look up to for this. Base your choices for dates on that list and date with intention! 

8. Save money. If you don't do it when you're broke, you wont' do it when you have a salary. 

9. Have confidence in who you are and who you're striving to be. You don't have to do anything that will challenge your values or don't want to do (even if your friends are doing it). 

10. Boundaries. No is a full sentence and doesn't need an explaination. Respect it if you hear it. Use it if you need to.

11. Trust your intuition. If your gut says something isn't right, it probably isn't.

12. My personal message for you GEHS class of 2022 and anyone I've taught that will always be "my kids". 

If you found the content in this podcast helpful or useful, please screenshot this episode and share it on your social media. Tag me on IG @divorce.proof.marriage 

Email me at coaching@recognizingpotential for more information on coaching. 

Episode 38 focuses heavily on Dr. John Gottman's research in answering the bids for connection with your partner. Your partner can bid for connection with you over 100 times in a single meal! Are you answering those calls, turning away or rejecting them altogether? In this short but powerful episode, I'm talking to you and giving examples of how you can be on the lookout for your partner's request for connection each day, how you can make those connections and how you can grow together in your marriage.

I also talk to you about one possible solution to growing the connection, strengthening your marriage and improving your conversation- my monthly membership, Connected. For only $27 a month, you get 40 connecting questions/conversation starters you can use to have conversations with your partner that deepen connection and give you something to talk about other than "How was your day?", the weather, the kids or other "business like" topics of marriage and every day life. I give you two coaching calls that offer tips, tricks and ways for you to enhance your relationship and you get FREE access to any workshops I'm offering that month! For April, I'll be doing a workshop on communication styles. On the first of every month, the questions will change to 40 new conversation starters. The coaching videos from the previous month will come down and you'll have 2 new videos posted so as your membership renews, so will your marriage! Sign up for Connected here: recognizingpotential.teachable.com/p/connected

It would absolutely make my day if you would rate and review this podcast! Also, if you have any specific topics you'd like me to cover, please don't hesitate to email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com

I'm planning an aviation summit mainly for pilot wives but really will help anyone in the aviation industry. We have over 10 speakers speaking over a two day period, giveaways and so many resources. If you're in the aviation industry and want to join that- go to www.facebook.com/groups/aviationsummit22

One of the intake questions for that group asks what you're struggling with. Almost half of the group said communication in one form or another. That made me realize that maybe everyone can benefit from some communication tips that aren't talked about often or thought of truly as communication. That's where this episode stemmed from. The ridiculous chant we heard as a kid that sticks and stones may break our bones but words will never hurt me, so untrue! Couldn't possibly be further from the truth, in fact. Words have the power to build your partner up or tear them down, to provide solace and comfort or harm and hurt. When you're talking about the person who is supposed to be your number 1 only behind God, wouldn't you want to make sure those words are only being used in the utmost of ways? Of course you do! Here's how. I give you 7 communication tips in this episode, some of which you probably haven't thought about in a long time, if ever! Take a listen and be sure to apply what you learned to your marriage. Each one of these can be implemented as soon as you're finished listening to this episode!

If you love this episode, please review and share! It absolutely makes my day when listeners do that as it helps get the content into other people's hands so they can better their marriages as well! Also, if you'd like to tag me when you share, you can find my marriage coaching group at www.facebook.com/groups/recognizingpotential and on IG you can find me at www.instagram.com/divorce.proof.marriage

Happy New Year!! 

I'm not gonna lie, this might be my best episode in a long time! It is NOT, however, in the best interest to listen with little ears as we do talk about sex on a deeper emotional level.

In this episode I talk all about how to know if your marriage is lacking the emotional intimacy you need to really be meeting your fullest potential as a couple. I explain in detail the differences between men and women in terms of communication styles, what is needed to build emotional connection, how to get back to that place you were when you were dating, and how to build better emotional connection so your life in the bedroom is FIRE! This episode also has some parenting hacks thrown in as emotions and emotional communication in parenting is concerned. Emotional regulation is not taught in public schools, as former educator, I know. Teachers try but it's really an icing on the cake thing, not something that's given a lot of time or effort, sadly. So it's up to parents to teach our kids and how can we do that if we don't have those skills in the first place? Additionally, we teach our children and our spouses how to communicate with us and I give examples of that in this episode!

Listen to this episode and if you love it or it helped you, please consider sharing it on your social media feeds. Don't forget to review it as well. It would absolutely make my day! 

As always, if you had a revelation during this episode that you need help with anything I've talked about, please reach out to me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com for any course openings or 1:1 coaching options. 

Talk to you next week! :) 

WOW! The last episode before 2022! Can you believe it? In the beginning of this episode, I talk about what I have open for coaching possibilities and you can find or sign up for those at www.recognizingpotential.com/courses  The rest of the episode is on how to set goals that you'll actually accomplish for the New Year! I talk about all the things to think about for reflective purposes and learning, how to see patterns in your life and what to do to fix those patterns. I talk all about what I'm doing and give you real examples of goals and how to set those. There is a lot of little nuggets in getting to know me in this episode as well so I hope you enjoy that too. 

If you have any topics you want to hear in the new year, please email those to me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com. Also, if you haven't already, please go leave a review for the show! It helps get the show into more people's ears and also helps influencers that I'm wanting to interview say YES to being interviewed for the show! Did you know that's how they choose what they will and won't be interviewed for? 

This week's episode is with Dr. Tiffany Nguyen- a spiritual life coach and full-time pharmacist. Her story involves moving here from a different country and needing to find happiness. She found that and so much more! Dr. Nguyen helps people rediscover themselves after a break up or before a new relationship so they can get rid of old patterns and habits to build the best version of themselves. This allows that person to enter a relationship as a healthy, whole individual to create a healthy, whole, happy relationship/marriage. 

On this episode, we talk a lot about self-awareness, what happiness is and how to achieve it, how relationships are formed from a healthy place, how to break unhealthy patterns in relationships and how obtaining inner peace is the key to having outer peace and fulfillment. 

Note: the viewpoints of Dr. Nguyen do not reflect the viewpoints of Recognizing Potential Coaching or Kameran Thompson Al-Areqi. They are solely based on Dr. Nguyen's viewpoints, experiences and beliefs. 

Dr. Nguyen's website is https://spunkyspiritualist.com/

If you have any other relationship/marriage topics you'd like to hear on the podcast, please email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com

This is the first ever episode where I have jumped into the topic of sex on this podcast. I asked you to give me your questions regarding sex and boy did you deliver! Sex coach Shannon Burton is an erotic poet and certified sex coach that answers all of your questions and dives into the importance of communication, making sure she comes before he does, what to do if you aren't "as good" in bed as your partner, E.D., how to make scheduled sex fun and so much more! This conversation lead into so many different topics! If you are struggling in the bedroom, a few pieces of advice that Coach Shannon offers is: 

1. Don't wait to ask for help! Reach out! You can find her on Twitter @sexcoachshannon,  on FB: Sex Coach Shannon, LinkedIn: Shannon Burton, SXI and on her website www.sexcoachshannon.com. 

2. Communicate! If you struggle to communicate about sex because it's uncomfortable or you aren't sure where to start in getting a better sex life, again- reach out! Myself or Coach Shannon would be happy to dive into that with you to help you have a more fulfilling sex life.

3. Get to know yourself. Get to know your partner. It's the only way you're going to gain the fulfillment you are needing in the bedroom.

If you have any other questions that you'd like to ask, Coach Shannon has a blog where she answers your questions anonymously or directly. 

There is a large stigma around getting help with your relationship and especially with your sex life but it doesn't have to be that way. Normalize getting help and accepting that everyone has things they need to be successful- maybe a coach is what you need, and that's ok! 

Better Me, Better Us is open! This is THE course to teach you how to save your marriage by yourself! If you're ready to start making BIG changes in your marriage and your home without your partner being on board, jump in! We start Jan 4, 2022! Spots are limited and going fast! www.recognizingpotential.com/product/better-me-better-us

This week's episode is all about what the happiest marriages have- FILTERS! Everyone needs a filter on their mouth, a filter on their eyes and one for their heart to create a safe, peaceful marriage. So often it comes down to rewording your truth so that it's gently received instead of a blow to the gut, seeing your partner for who they are instead of who we want them to be, seeing marriage for what it is instead of the fairytale that Disney movies put into our heads from birth and filtering your heart so you have the ability to regulate your emotions. In this episode, I'm laying it all out there with specific examples from my own marriage how we do (and don't) apply these filters and what the results are from that. I give you tips and tricks on how to word things so they come off less abrasive to your spouse. These are tips you can start applying as soon as you hit end on this episode. If you need help with these, please email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com. Additionally, if this helps you at all, don't forget to like, subscribe, leave a review and share this episode with others so they can have a beautiful marriage too!  

Did you know we have over 400 thoughts a minute? Our self-talk creates our words, our decisions, and what we ultimately live into. If we are primarily engaged in negative self-talk, the environment around us is also going to be primarily negative. Change that script to being primarily positive and now we have a whole new world to live in that gives us and those around us more energy, more love, light and happiness. Here's my story of self-talk and how I changed mine to begin to better my marriage. I get very vulnerable with you about my marriage and what it was like 3 years ago before I started coaching so you can understand where I was, how bad it was and what I did to change my marriage...by myself. Yes, it's possible! I teach an entire 8 week full course on bettering your marriage by yourself! If you'd like to jump in on that, the link is- www.recognizingpotential.com/courses/better-me-better-us

If you're like me and you have a spouse who isn't on board with coaching, therapy or counseling, it's ok. There's PLENTY you can do to save your marriage by yourself. Changing your self-talk is only the start, the tip of the iceberg, if you will. 

Take the challenge and start being mindful of your self-talk. Email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com to let me know how it's going for you! I'd love to hear from you and celebrate your success! 

Week 3 of our mini-series on marriages that aren't your typical togetherness every night of the week and how we make it work. This week is all about aviation life from a Pilot Wife's perspective. I talk about how my husband, Moe, and I make our relationship work when he's gone anywhere between 15-23 days a month. There is one disclaimer I need to mention. I talk in there about how pilot's don't make any money. I need to add to that. In the beginning when they're a first officer, flying for regionals like my husband does, they make very little. However, as they upgrade to captain and then onto the majors (United, Delta, American, etc) they do make good money and even better as they become a captain with seniority with those major companies. It's a VERY. LONG. ROAD. though. I do give a lot of good connection tips for long distance relationships in this episode and I am, true to who I am, quite honest about this life and how I feel about it. ;) It's not all sunshine and roses. These are things that a lot of people don't understand when they fly. They get to go see their families and that's fantastic but on the other side of that flight is a pilot who hasn't been home in several days and a family who is sacrificing a lot of family time so others can be with theirs. Next time you fly, thank your flight crew. Be kind to them. Show empathy. (Starbucks gift cards are ALWAYS appreciated as well.) PW life isn't all bad. Hard but also rewarding. I hope you find tools you can use in your own marriage.

Man y'all! I'm so excited about this week's guest! Maria Shelton brings the HEAT with so many nuggets around marriage, supporting your spouse through grief and loss, supporting your spouse through entrepreneurship, career change and starting that journey. We talk candidly about parenting teens, building a relationship with God and life in general! Her attitude, grace and energy are so contagious and she is just as gorgeous on the inside as she is on the outside! I promise you there is something for every single person in this episode! Maria also just launched a course on making money off the lifestyle you're already living (yes! Even if YOU think it's boring, you can still make money off of it!) It is absolute FIRE! I signed up for it myself and am not just saying that 'cause she's my guest. It really is incredible! That can be found at https://www.mariashelton.com/courses 

If you're a parent and needing help with your kiddo's lunches or wanting information on making money off your lifestyle, fashion advice or you just want a beautiful soul that you can follow, her IG handle is @maria.shelton 

The audio is a little scratchy at times #countrylivin but it's still fantastic info! Please like, subscribe, share and leave a review! 

WOW! This episode is like a constant reel of life nuggets! If you are searching for your purpose, need help with emotional regulation, self-management, or are wondering how emotional intelligence plays into your daily life, this is the episode for you! Australian native, Katrina Hahling, is a brilliant author, purpose coach, restaurant owner, podcaster and so many other things! We talk in depth about so many topics in this episode, you will for sure find something to love. If you would like to order Katrina's book to help you reach your goals, The Desire Manifesto can be found on Amazon. Her facebook group Empowered Femme can be joined at www.facebook.com/groups/empoweredfemme Her website is www.katrinahahling.com and she can be found on instagram at www.instagram.com/katrina_hahling

Don't forget to like, share, comment and subscribe! 

You've planned your wedding down to the finest detail but have you planned for your marriage? How will you navigate your first fight as husband and wife? How will you navigate holidays, in-laws, children, roles, expectations, and the many trials and tribulations that marriage brings? In this episode, we cover how to make sure that your marriage is 30% happier, a small habit to start that will bring your marriage to a 12% divorce probability. We talk about how love is a verb, not a noun. The tools you learn in pre-marital coaching will literally change your family tree for the better! Remember those times where you're not going to "feel in love". These and other times will require more connection. Every person feels connection differently. Now is the time to learn how to connect with your partner on a deeper level. Learn how to be and have attentiveness, responsiveness and engagement. Learn how to fight fair. Conflict is inevitable in marriage. Most people bring in fight styles they've learned from their parents or in past relationships. Many of these fight styles aren't healthy. With coaching, you learn how to fight fair so you're fighting together instead of against each other. If you want more info on pre-marital coaching, email me at coaching@recognizingpotential.com