(Dangerous )Tales from the UTE (pick up truck)lonely planet.bike packing, near death experiences,dangerous travel ,grassroots-travel, bicycle, cycle touring ,hitchhiking,sailing,illegal border crossing,drugs,guns, corruption, comedy,humour,philosophy, inspiration.India,Thailand ,Malaysia,Indonesia,Australia.sheep farms,fruit picking ,washing dishes ,knives ,opium, heroin, bandits,Khun Sa ,

This Episode paints a lil picture of where the journey began ,upstairs above a laundrette , and the need to find adventure from an early age . It touches on the rather rustic childhood I had in a rural town before moving closer to the bigger cities and the characters I encountered. From kids knocking me out with bricks to thugs trying to beat me ,to male strippers and a farmer called red vest . It’s probably easier just to listen .

Back at the Blue Oyster Bar Trying to get enough cash to leave Tonga 🇹🇴 while avoiding gold diggers and getting married .Lil Frank burns his bridge with Naomi .This is the last of the book 📕 chapters . Gonna finish my book next and if I get enough positive feedback do another podcast of 7 months hitching and walking back through SE Asia . Just gotta make sense of my old journals and sort the gems from the grime . Let me know if you’re keen to hear more yarns 😎

I sail out the outer islands where I meet Lavasi who takes me across stone fish infested reef to a place I can pretend I’m Robinson Cruiso .

Got a job working for a Swedish lady at the Blue Oyster Bar surrounded by many interesting characters.

Limboing my way out of the kiwi plantation for a chance to sail away to Tonga with an Angry Pirate and a Cherokee Indian Surfer from Cali.

Crossed the pacific in a shinny silver bullet. Bought a bike off a bloke at the Flying Hedgehog 🦔 for 150 kiwi dollars ... Tied my backpack on the back rack and headed south .

Working two jobs… amongst drug and alcohol dependent tenants during the day and cocaine addicted customers and staff at night . Then a dude rocks up smoking bongs from dawn til dusk and drags Deano into the darkness. Justin and me take sanctuary in the ocean swells at maroubra . A local Bra boy hurts Jay . Amongst all this my old man shows up ⬆️ 😎

Finding Bri living in “The Cross (Red Light District ) thick in the clan with a gang of Scottish blokes bent on causing mayhem when ever they could .And a Jean-Claude Van Damme wanna be gets jiggy with a big knife 🔪.

Still in Byron hunting down Gold Tops and watching the sharks follow the surfers .

Back to Perth with a wad full of splodoonies . Searching out my old mate Bri . But he’s already heading east toward a rising sun ☀️ so I take off after him with a couple of naked blokes .

Subjected to a daily rattle ,getting verbal and actual shit thrown at me .I strive to pull my weight and get my own back on the shearer’s .Warning this podcast has some crude shearer’s humour which I’ve left in to project the true reality of life in the sheds .

Hitching South away from the tropical paradise. Bri and me wander different paths in the search for work.I arrive at a shearing town out in the salt lakes .

Bri and Me hitch into Broome in search of work.

As we slice through the India ocean we meet up with Ant Muffy and The Funky Turtle . We sail together toward Broome.Danger is always close by .We tread with trepidation past croc slides and box jelly fish . Ant loses a prized possession and Muffy finds treasure after a close call with a cliff.

Sailing back out into the Kimberley and down the coast …under watchful eyes. Keywords: Red eyes in the dark,what was that noise ? Chuck a coconut !

This is a dedication to a beautiful person Jose ….See you in the next life !

Trying to survive Darwin the troppo troops and a dark demon .We roll down the hill to Dinah beach yacht club for a chance to escape. 😎 key words I wish I could fly ,Joseph Bonaparte gulf , SeaPlane Bay, big waves 🌊 . Saving your skin with a sextant .

Finally Bri and Me reach the “pot of gold” at the end of our rainbow . The pot of gold also has six meter long crocodiles,box jelly fish and big sharks ..but the streets are even more dangerous.Key words :Troppo .drunk arseholes, near death experiences,running for your life.

Could have died but ended up saving a life in this one ( with the help of a legend Balinese dude with two surf boards)Bri and me reach Kuta Bali ,the young Australians Ibiza .. gritty seedy and sporadically dangerous . Corruption .. Drugs .. and close shaves before being summoned to help a drowning man . There’s a bit of time travel to give more depth to Bali and it’s underworld .ps if someone hands you a pill in a pitch black nightclub don’t take it .

After a jungle kip stop with Acmed the wardrobe guru and Mo Moon Kopi lady Bri and Me crest the final hill and catch a ferry across the Sunda Straights to Java and Jakarta . Unfortunately we come across a few unwanted blades along the way .

Navigating the volcanic landscape to the west coast of Sumatra .Hard as nails monkeys.smugglers broken buses . magic mush rooms and Mr BoomBoom ?

Otangutans 🦧 Bemo’s Bombs 💣 and big bloody hills . Detours through dense jungle..Volcanoes and Gigolos . The first part of our Indonesian adventure as we gun toward Australia 🇦🇺 listen to the end for the Bri interview 😎

Heading down the Malaysian peninsula. Skint and kipping on plastic wrapped beaches and in a very cheap hotel with an unusual bar .

With cash and time against us Bri and me decide to hitch back to Bangkok and ride to Malaysia from there . Kipping in monasteries and on the floor in the back of a friendly shop keepers gaff .

This episode follows Bri and me circumnavigating the Gulf of Thailand heading in the direction of Cambodia . We stop in at Pattaya until we realise it’s one big brothel And head further south in search of paradise at Ko Samet .Bris holy water saves his arse and I end up getting a beating .

Bri and me follow a hand drawn map and ride along the Terai (grass lands and swamps ) til we find a break in the Himalayan mountains . Slowly we weave our way up the river valleys ,avoiding the massive drops offs and washouts . We sleep rough in Tiger territory,meet a friendly Gurkha, and hobble into Kathmandu.. no money a bunch of bananas and a loaf of bread we head for kolkata Thanks for the music Arnav Srivastav 😎

Have split this episode in two more bite sized chunks . Flashed up the intro a bit but apart from that it’s the same audio as before .This Episode is the real start of the journey and hopefully inspiration to anyone considering stepping off the 'merry go round' for a bit .
The sudden inspiration to leave and the challenge of finding a committed travelling buddy(aka Brian) amongst the eight pint heroes who were all set to go until they woke up the next morning.
Escaping the drunken nights in Halifax and almost not making it , lying in the road bleeding after falling off the back of a truck.
Trying to earn extra cash with my step dad Freddy and a bloke nearly killing him right before our eyes .
Arriving in New Delhi and not wanting to get out of the taxi due to the insanely high population density of 33,000 people per square kilometre.
Forcing our way out of the city and across the plains toward the Nepalese border ,kipping outside mosques, under monkey filled banyan trees and farm yards ,wading through raw sewerage, getting rail roaded by an irate dude on an Enfield , being chased into the paddy field by the 'Sly Stallone trucks ' getting bed bugged and bear hugged , before finally wading across a weir and riding passed the low key Nepalese border with immigration chasing us.
Next stop ...riding up the little toe of the Himalaya.

Have split this episode in two more bite sized chunks . Flashed up the intro a bit but apart from that it’s the same audio as before .This Episode is the real start of the journey and hopefully inspiration to anyone considering stepping off the 'merry go round' for a bit .
The sudden inspiration to leave and the challenge of finding a committed travelling buddy(aka Brian) amongst the eight pint heroes who were all set to go until they woke up the next morning.
Escaping the drunken nights in Halifax and almost not making it , lying in the road bleeding after falling off the back of a truck.
Trying to earn extra cash with my step dad Freddy and a bloke nearly killing him right before our eyes .
Arriving in New Delhi and not wanting to get out of the taxi due to the insanely high population density of 33,000 people per square kilometre.
Forcing our way out of the city and across the plains toward the Nepalese border ,kipping outside mosques, under monkey filled banyan trees and farm yards ,wading through raw sewerage, getting rail roaded by an irate dude on an Enfield , being chased into the paddy field by the 'Sly Stallone trucks ' getting bed bugged and bear hugged , before finally wading across a weir and riding passed the low key Nepalese border with immigration chasing us.
Next stop ...riding up the little toe of the Himalaya.