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Screw Up

Screw Up

By Screw Up
The podcast where we learn from our mistakes by making more of them. Hosted by Chicago Comedians C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose
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66. Screw Up the Scam
"We've got ourselves a real Helen Hunt situation." Does ANYONE know how to buy a forest? It's Screw Up the Podcast! This week, Emma and CJ discuss being scammed by the world, the ones we love, and of course, ourselves. But more specifically, having the pipe dream that there's a ton of good in the world! Emma goes deep undercover inside her very own Instagram to discover that people aren't always what they may seem on the internet? And CJ, bless his heart, continues to prove how sheltered he is, the sweet summer child. Am I speaking to the owner of the house? You have sixty seconds to tell me or your bank account gets it! It's Screw Up the Scam! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
55:29
June 19, 2022
65. Screw Up the Hygge
"I guess mattresses really do double in size, but is it from all the skin cells or from all the piss?" Are you familiar with the idea of hygge? It's all about keeping it cozy and safe, building a nest in your home to kick back and convalesce in. This week, we're talking about beds and how much skin gets absorbed into them (and your pillows), we share our favorite tips and tricks for cozi-fying your abode, and Emma tries to convince CJ that taxidermy is somehow good for the balance of energy. To quote her: "taxidermy is a strong word." Turn yourself into a human meatball, cover yourself in blankets until the pain goes away, and get ready for your first Mushy Detroit: it's time for Screw Up the Hygge! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:04:13
June 05, 2022
64. Screw Up the Fitness
"We're not doing an episode on sounding, and anyone who knows what sounding is knows why." Drop and give us 43!...minutes of your time to listen to Screw Up the Fitness! This week, we're talking about why motivation isn't just a four-letter word, tips and tricks about exercise from people who often can't be bothered to do it, and Emma talks about how her innocent, virgin hands became women (if you believe in that sort of thing) with the help of the family Shake Weight. So take some time for fitness...fittin' this podcast into your day, you busy mom! Okay, we'll stop making that joke. Screw Up the Fitness! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
43:23
May 22, 2022
63. Screw Up Canada (with Emma!)
"I feel very short and homely because I've been eating pizza in my car for eight hours." This week on Screw Up the Podcast, CJ steps aside so we can hear all about Emma's trip to Canada! She opens up about how a journey to the Great White North led to moving into Soberville, a car cavity search from un-mounted mounties (she specifically says they're not mounties, but I'm the one writing this and I thought that sounded cute) at the US-Canada border, a deluxe night out in Ontario facilitated through the tried and true method of following hot people, driving in cars with (possibly high school) boys, pissing on tress, and well...I don't wanna give too much away. This is a tale that maple LEAVES nothing on the table - it's Screw Up Canada! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
35:50
May 08, 2022
62. Screw Up the Stand-Up
"And as a lab rat, I should know when they're coming." What's the deal with podcasting?! This week, we're back in the studio (aka CJ's apartment) to talk about something that makes us both sick with glee and with something akin to food poisoning: doing stand-up comedy! We talk about our favorite comedians, Santa's pendulus testacles, senior pictures, and Emma convinces (read: tricks) CJ into reading some absolutely disgusting copypastas that probably should have been censored. Plus, we tell some of our favorite jokes that we've written and even some that we're still workshopping! Tighten up that five minutes and gird your pelvic floor, it's time for Screw Up the Stand-Up! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
41:33
April 24, 2022
61. Screw Up the Sex Toy (Re-release)
Hey y'all - while we're continuing to get a tenuous grasp on health and scheduling stuff, we wanted to share one of our all time favorite episodes again: Screw Up the Sex Toy! Enjoy! "I want someone in the Pentagon to figure out whether or not I have colon cancer." This week, Emma and CJ talk about going and having sex with yourself already!  We talk about our choices for the only songs we can listen to for the rest of our lives (off-topic?  on brand!), pegging, sounding, fisting, having hot greasy sex with yourself, and of course, what it's like to expose your sexual deviancy to a bunch of strangers accidentally!  Twist yourself into a comfortable position in that sex swing and lube up that 3-inch angry dildo you got as a gag gift; it's time for Screw Up the Sex Toy! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:05:43
April 10, 2022
60. Screw Up the Mood Part 2 (with CJ!)
"You are a 'born to hand jive' turkey, how about that?" This week, CJ takes on the world and revisits topics from a few months ago: mood, meds, and mental health. He gives an update on his psychiatry and therapy, talks about the importance of boundaries, and discusses the differences between selfishness and self-preservation - and why for some of us, we can't help but feel guilty when we put ourselves first. While this is a heavier episode, the goal was to end on a lighter note, and we hope you get at least a few flavorful notes out of CJ's mind gravy. Times are weird - start a relationship with yourself. Thanks for listening to another episode of Screw Up the Podcast. LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
45:55
March 27, 2022
59. Screw Up The Recipe
"A watched piss never boils!" You know you saw us CUMIN - another episode of Screw Up the Podcast! This week, Emma learns about the joy of sweet potatoes,  we find out neither of us knows what's in a souffle, and we go completely off the rails for nearly ten minutes about the differences of fear and compassion as motivators! Yet another notch in the Emeril Legacy of this podcast! If that pun tastes bad, add more garlic! Buon appetito - you've got a heaping pile of steaming Screw Up on your plate! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
55:38
March 13, 2022
58. Screw Up the Porn
"Maybe I should join a cunt!" Ooh baby, here comes the pizza delivery man with a big pipe to come and change your TV channel! Welcome to an episode that's technically 58, but has all the energy of a 69: Screw Up the Porn! This week, we talk about spelling the word "cult," where milk comes from, and how porn can still be hot AND problematic. Oh, and don't forget: the opposite of guilt is money! Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Screw Up the Podcast! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
55:00
March 06, 2022
57. Screw Up the Name
"What do they do? Wet breadsticks and no delivery?" What's in a name? Letters! This week, Emma and CJ talk about the string of vowels and consonants your mom would weaponize against you whenever you were up to mischief! We discuss how much we like our name (hint: it's a lot!), CJ talks about how no one can ever guess his middle name, and Amber Ross (formerly Emma Rose) doesn't remember your name, but knows you have one! Who are you again? Why, we're Screw Up the Podcast! Nice to meet you! UNLESS YOU'RE MIKE (jk). LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
47:28
February 27, 2022
56. Screw Up the Language
"Like if a buffalo from Buffalo were to buffalo ANOTHER buffalo from Buffalo..." As a wise and terrifying man once said, "English mutha#$*@: do you speak it?" And we said: kinda! This week, we're talking about languages! Emma shares a cautionary tale about how the Internet always be Internet'in, even OFF the Internet, CJ sings a song about knowing l'alphabet, and we both share our contrasting opinions on being gaslit by everyone's favorite linguistic-loving owl! If you can read this, you're already doing language! Please enjoy this week's episode by using your comprehension! Viva la the metric system! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!   
45:32
February 21, 2022
55. Screw Up the Horror Flick
"I wish I had Saw None." Hear that strange sound coming from the basement? Why that's just Screw Up the Horror Flick! This week, we're SPOOKIN' up the podcast with an episode all about our favorite (and not-so-favorite) fright flicks! CJ calls out Haley Joel Osmond for being a fake ass bitch (kinda?), Emma edges our listeners (...kinda?), and we both dive deep into how a beloved style of filmography can be at times incredibly problematic (kinda but also definitely). Pop some popcorn and wear a nightie made of chainmail to protect yourself in a knife fight: it's time for this week's Screw Up the Podcast! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
56:19
February 13, 2022
54. Screw Up the Haircut
"There were people dying, but I had long hair."  Welcome to this week's episode, Screw Up the Haircut, would you like a coffee or water while you wait? This week, we try (and SCREW UP) having an opener that isn't about sex, Emma says the phrase "God's White Braid," CJ talks about how this widdle weapoard got his spots, and both of us are absolutely high on Got2B hair spray! Let's all either get bangs or remind ourselves to not get bangs! Screw Up the Podcast: a show about nothing and everything, today! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
37:07
February 06, 2022
53. Screw Up the Restaurant [Part 2]
"He calls me up and says, "Hey, Microboobs! We doin' a podcast today?" And we DID! Welcome to another steamed, sliced, and sauteed episode of Screw Up the Podcast, where we talk about restaurants - again! We discuss our own personal cafe faux-pas (that's French for we don't like assholes who eat out...but we DO like eating out...never mind), we lament about the tragedy to befall all servers: side work, and CJ talks about that time he had sex in a bathroom at Eagan's on Water Street in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 53202. Yes, this WAS what you ordered and no, there ARE no substitutions! Screw Up the Podcast: we're what butter is for food, but for podcasting - bad for you in large quantities. Good thing our episodes are snack-size - excuse me, amuse bouches.  De rien for the content, mon petit listeners! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
40:45
January 29, 2022
52. Screw Up the Instrument
"We BOTH picked abortion songs!" Clean those spit valves, scordaturHUNS, it's time for Screw Up the Instrument! (MAJOR brownie points if you can understand that incredibly shoehorned-in joke that obviously CJ came up with) This week, CJ teaches the children about the slightly offensive name for the bassoon in the German language, and Emma's sad it isn't about sword-fighting, Emma wistfully recalls an underrated wind instrument: the harmonica, and we both talk about the frustrations about teaching and being taught by those lost in the sauce (hint: the sauce is not jazz). Don't touch that dial - unless it's to tune our podcast to 440 HZ - you're listening to a brand new (maybe!) episode of SUTP! Boy, I really am a huge fucking nerd! Hell yeah! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
46:18
January 22, 2022
51. Screw Up The New Year
"What if I was a centaur?"  Ooh baby, new year, same ol' us!  Welcome back to Screw Up the Podcast in the year of 2022, the year where we fail ourselves to love ourselves! This week, we talk about "Resolvelutions," the title of our new book (should we write a book?)!  Emma talks about emotional masturbation and CJ talks about...regular masturbation! And we announce the winners of two limited edition Screw Up fridge magnets!  C'est magnetfique!  2022: Screw Crew, We Love You!  Thanks for listening to Screw Up The Podcast!   LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:00:51
January 08, 2022
50. Screw Up: The 50th Episode
WE ARE 50.  Can you believe it!?  Believe it!  Right now!  It's our 50th episode, everyone!  We're doing something a bit special this week, and I don't want to give too much away, so I'll just say we hope you enjoy it and thank you for all of the support this year!  We'll be releasing our Christmas episode next week and then taking a break until January 8th, so look forward to Emma's Santa jokes and CJ's cries for helf!  If you're reading this, we are so grateful to you!  Thank you for being a part of our journey!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
58:30
December 11, 2021
49. Screw Up the Restaurant [Part 1]
"If you're puttin' your bare pussy in 'em, then you better be washin' that denim!" It's Saturday folks, and you know what that means!  That's right: we're understaffed!  Welcome to another episode of Screw Up the Podcast, still or sparkling?  This week, we talk about the beauty and beasty of working hard and playing hardEST in the restaurant industry, being mislabeled as a racist for not understanding how to put on a headset, and sometimes, listeners, the customer serves YOU. Plus, we read an e-mail from one of our listeners!  Want us to read your email?  Send us your stories at screwupthepodcast@gmail.com! Time to roll some silverware, because you're gonna get CUT - don't worry, that's a good thing!  Screw Up the Podcast: rate us on Yelp!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:04:17
December 04, 2021
48. Screw Up the Thanksgiving
"I only ate maybe half of it again."  Everyone!  Hello!  How do you be grateful?  With turkey, family, and inexpensive electronics (down with Black Friday, power to the workers!) - oh, and maybe this podcast?  This week, we talk about Thanksgiving...kinda (it's actually a lot about Doritos)!  Emma paints with all the colors of her wind...pipe (stretch, bear with me), CJ regrets never eating dog food, and we share our gratitude for YOU - our listeners!  We're so thankful you're here, and stick around for even more gratitude and podcasting!  Pass the cranberry sauce and tell Grandpa that saying that IS racist even if he thinks it sounds nice, it's time for Screw Up the Thanksgiving! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
54:16
November 27, 2021
47. Screw Up the Tattoo
"I want a turducken, but in like, a Wet Seal outfit."  My body, my canvas!  This week on Screw Up the Podcast, we're talking about slingin' ink and poundin' skin!  If you guessed sex with quills, you're oddly somewhat correct!  Tattoos!  CJ talks about manic episodes leading to bean fingers (it'll make sense with context, I hope), Emma comes out of the closet as library-sensual, and both of us believe that there should be NO REGERTS when it comes to getting a tattoo!  Love yourself, even if you have a tribal tattoo!  We don't care!  We aren't your mothers!  Screw Up the Podcast: Not Being Your Mom Since 2021.  Thanks for listening!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
44:46
November 20, 2021
46. Screw Up the Gambling [Re-release]
Hey Screw Crew!  This week, we're taking a break to get some things together for our big 50th episode coming out in a few weeks!  So let's revisit an oldie but juicy Screw Up the Gambling! "I like the color of your name." Big money, all whammy?  This week, Emma and CJ talk about everyone's favorite source of passive income: gambling!  We talk about being enticed into hopping in cars with strange men and heading to the warm paradise of Indiana, slots, and how Vana White can fill OUR slots any ol' time!  Time is money, so take a gamble on your time and see if you'll like this episode!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
47:43
November 13, 2021
45. Screw Up the Piercing
"I clogged it out of my belly button." Welcome to Screw Up the Piercing, the episode where we talk about making holes in ourselves!  This week, we become D.W. apologists, we climb Jacob's Ladder, Emma does Old Testament math because she can't count with her hand anymore (details inside!), and CJ tells a story about how accidentally dressing in baby drag got him outed by a drunk woman with candy. Grab your coupon for Claire's and get emotionally manipulated by a man with an iguana - it's time for Screw Up the Piercing!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:08:12
November 06, 2021
44. Screw Up the Halloween
"You know always keep that thing on me.  And by thing, I mean mouth."  Hey Screw Crew!  Is there anything better than a couple o' BOOS and some Charleston Chews?  How about multiple uncomfortable stories about creating smells?  This week, we've got a special Halloween episode for y'all!  We talk about Stephanie Meyer's suspiciously powerful ability to rouse a nation of twinks and tweens, CJ is unambiguously ambiguously gay, and Emma tells a hair-raising (and singing) tale about deceit, a room of shared stink, and loving yourself.  I don't remember eating candy corn - it's time for Screw Up the Podcast, Halloween Edition! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:08:43
October 30, 2021
43. Screw Up the Party
"Or, it would just be Jeff Goldblum and his big, giant dick!" [Note: we tried another new setup for recording, so CJ's audio is a wee borked this episode, we're trying to find the sweet spot and appreciate your understanding!] This week on SUTP, CJ and Emma are reunited to talk about parties!  We for some reason discuss the first Pokemon movie for ten minutes, pinpoint the moments we lost our youth, discuss debt for a bit (again, what??) and Emma has an interesting take on the drinking age being 21.  Stay tuned for our next creative project, "Mad Boys."  Flip your friend on your stomach and break out the Sativa, it's time for Screw Up the Party!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:09:46
October 23, 2021
42. Screw Up the Birth Control
TW: This episode covers sexual assault and other sexual conduct that could be difficult to listen to.  Please take care while listening or skip this episode if need be - we love you Screw Crew, be good to yourselves.   "Isn't being funny the real privilege?"  This week, Emma goes solo and talks about the complexities of being a woman on birth control.  She talks about the unbalanced responsibilities of birth control, unhealthy relationships with churches and biases, and gets incredibly personal and intimate in a conversation about giving and living life.  She also encourages solidarity and empowerment for women everywhere to be in control of their lives and bodies and includes resources on how to be a better ally to the women in your life.  Another powerful episode of Screw Up the Podcast - Screw Up the Birth Control.  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
44:05
October 16, 2021
41. Screw Up the Thievery
"This uncle is...pretty gay."  Welcome one and all to another rousing episode of Screw Up the Podcast!  This week, we're not just stealing the spotlight, but also your hearts, and maybe your purses!  But don't worry, we'll never get away with it, because of meddling kids, like us!  In this week's episode, CJ wears a thong to be a trailblazing feminist (and a hot bitch!), Emma needs to be bleeped for the first time ever, and we both discover that we're too pure to be cool.  Break your child's piggy bank for bail money, it's time for Screw Up the Podcast! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
43:26
October 09, 2021
40. Screw Up the Sex Toy
"I want someone in the Pentagon to figure out whether or not I have colon cancer." This week, Emma and CJ talk about going and having sex with yourself already!  We talk about our choices for the only songs we can listen to for the rest of our lives (off-topic?  on brand!), pegging, sounding, fisting, having hot greasy sex with yourself, and of course, what it's like to expose your sexual deviancy to a bunch of strangers accidentally!  Twist yourself into a comfortable position in that sex swing and lube up that 3-inch angry dildo you got as a gag gift; it's time for Screw Up the Sex Toy! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:05:41
October 02, 2021
39. Screw Up the Mood (w/CJ!)
TW: This episode covers mental illness, binge eating, self-harm, and intrusive thoughts, so please take care while listening or skip this episode if need be - we love you Screw Crew, be good to yourselves.  Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
47:24
September 24, 2021
38. Screw Up the Nudes
"Imagine getting paid that much, going through all that schooling, just to come out the other side stupid."  Show us yours, and we'll show you ours - it's time for another episode!  If you listened to last week, we promised a story about nudes that would SHOCK and AWE!  And this week, we're doing a hard-hitting expose we're calling, "The Odyssey of Anastasia Beaverhausen."  Plus, CJ sees a lot of buttholes for some guy trying to get a coffee with a nice man.  It's time to catfish your principal as we bear (or bare, cuz NAKED) it ALL this week on Screw Up the Podcast!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
01:04:50
September 18, 2021
37. Screw Up the Phone
"...but did you miss the shins?"  Ring ring! Is that a podcast in your pocket, or is it just your shamefully huge sex organ?  Don't adjust your screens, you've doomscrolled your way right into our newest episode - Screw Up the Phone!  This week, we pitch "A Christmas Carol" porn, CJ goes on an unhinged rant against bacon and Facebook (editor's note: neither are that good, STOP NOW and get your LIFE BACK), and Emma hints at a possible part two involving some scantily clad (or perhaps unclad) Instagram fellows.  Android?  iPhone?  Hate has no home here!  Screw Up the Phone - available on your phone!  Wow, shouldn't technology be better? LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
58:11
September 11, 2021
36. Screw Up the Memory
"And that's not sexist, cuz I don't want anything with a bra in it.  Algebra."  This week on Screw Up the Podcast, we're the FDA, and our memories are hot sacks of meat left out in the sun - we're desperately trying to recall them before you make them into hamburgers!  We talk about the tragedy of child chimney sweeps and how it inspired modern-day capitalism, we hit on people under the influence of "liquid courage," and CJ sings bars from SK8r Boi, unprompted, testing the patience of our listeners (that's you!) and the probabilities of copyright strikes!  Plus, movies?  Who needs 'em?  You might!  Who are you again?  It's Screw Up the Podcast!  Episode I forget!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
59:07
September 04, 2021
35. Screw Up the Pet [Part Two]
"I'm just gonna sit here and let my blood freeze."  This week on SUTP (Screw Up the Podcast, you see!), we give Bindi Irwin a run for her money and dive into the murky crocodile-filled swamp that is our past experiences with animals!  We talk about what temperature guinea pigs freeze at (Fahrenheit), fido auto-fellatio, and "we" realize that not all islands are warm!  Put down the pee pads before you listen to this episode, listeners, and not because we've inserted twenty minutes of waterfall sounds into the middle of the episode!  Spay and neuter your expectations, it's time for Screw Up the Podcast - PETS.  Part TWO!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
50:36
August 28, 2021
34. Screw Up the Outfit
"That's what I always say about the Quran."  Hey Screw Crew!  This week's episode is all about our fashions.  Or, more specifically, what it's like to be told to "take that thing off," but not in a fun way!  We talk about the forbidden truffle fries recipe Big Truffle doesn't want you to know about, we accidentally give Bam Margera a genius marketing idea, and we take a deep dive into a pool of /searing/ /hot/ /shaaaaaame/!  Put on your ten-gallon hats and tell your mom it's not a phase, it's time for Screw Up the Outfit!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
50:26
August 21, 2021
33. Screw Up the Pet [Part One]
"And I haven't had a single memory since!"  This week's episode is all bark and some bite - but don't euthanize us yet, listeners, it's Screw Up the Pet, part one of *muffled number noises*  In this episode, we share some past pet stories - some heartwarming, others heart-stopping, but you'll get to that, we accidentally eviscerate Paula Deen, and learn about even more uses for the incredible edible egg!  Take your worm pills and get ready to play fetch with your emotions this week on Screw Up the Podcast! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
40:59
August 14, 2021
32. Screw Up the Interview
"I thought the sex WAS the interview!"  Howdy listeners!  Where do you see yourself in 59 minutes and 30 seconds?  Hopefully, it's kneedeep in the breakroom banter of Screw Up the Podcast!  This week, Emma recalls a time where virtual corn was more important than her existence, CJ recalls a time where his sexual effervescence finally started paying the bills, and BOTH of us talk way too much (incoming mini-episode soon with a lot of what was cut out from this one!).  Sign your W-2s and tell your new boss you're fine with it - it's time for Screw Up the Interview!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
59:31
August 07, 2021
31. Screw Up the Gambling
"I like the color of your name." Big money, all whammy?  This week, Emma and CJ talk about everyone's favorite source of passive income: gambling!  We talk about being enticed into hopping in cars with strange men and heading to the warm paradise of Indiana, slots, and how Vana White can fill OUR slots any ol' time!  Time is money, so take a gamble on your time and see if you'll like this episode!  LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
46:28
July 31, 2021
30. Screw Up the Slumber
"Slumbering is for princesses.  Either I sleep...or I don't."   Riddle us this: how are you supposed to count sheep when they're all dead?  And DON'T just say you can count the dead sheep, you know that doesn't work! This week, CJ and Emma mind their p's and q's about their z's! We talk about how getting sober changed the game (again), about how our schedules and lifestyle made us extra wicked (so, you know, no rest), and we take a deep dive into what things (pills?) help us zonk out with our conk out!  Join us this week as we find ways to get back on track and taxidermy those sheep! LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
46:35
July 24, 2021
29. Screw Up the Spark [Part Two]
Oh the lost lovers & missed connections of our youth! C.J. & Emma, Chicagoland Comedians, wax nostalgic about the boys they crushed and had crushes on in their late teens. To quote C.J. in this episode on the topic of “those” parties when you’re 19, “it’s all drinking warm gin out of a water bottle and just…dreams.” LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
48:44
July 17, 2021
28. Screw Up the Step Sisters
Emma Rose is solely featured in this week’s episode (ironic as she is a ginger). In this, the second ever, solo-sode, Emma discusses the ins & outs of step-siblingship & her screwed up experiences as the red-headed step child in Alabamy. LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
29:44
July 10, 2021
27. Screw Up the Check Up [Part Two]
C.J. & Emma, Chicago-Transplant Comedians, explore an awkward waiting room experience - LIKE if you can relate 😬🥸🤫😏 & they also discuss animals who kidnap, murder, & mutilate. LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
58:07
July 03, 2021
26. Screw Up the Check Up [Part One]
Chicagoland Comedians C.J. & Emma discuss their “shared experience” of Emma’s first trip to the OBGYN (AKA the cock of the walk NOT the doc of the cock.) LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK •Rate •Review •Subscribe •Comment •Like •Love? •Email us @ ScrewUpThePodcast@Gmail.com •Follow >Twitter, IG, & YouTube< LISTEN ON •Spotify •Apple Podcasts •Google Podcasts •Overcast, •PocketCasts •RadioPublic •Breaker •Castbox, •Anchor.fm •& more!
57:50
June 26, 2021
25. Screw Up the Video Game (w/CJ!)
In this week's episode, CJ's all by himself - that's right, one voice for the price of two!  Emma's working on a super-secret project that CJ will absolutely disclose immediately upon starting the podcast, rendering the NDA null and void, but all in good fun!   CJ takes his solo debut opportunity to talk about video games.  He talks about how shame spirals fed a gaming addiction, how quitting drinking helped him accept himself as a gaymer, and how "guilty pleasures" is a damaging concept that needs to be wiped from our vernacular.   Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on the platform of your choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged! Feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & subscribe to the YouTube channel “Screw Up the Podcast” for additional great content!
44:09
June 20, 2021
24. Screw Up the Spark [Part One]
In this episode, Chicago Comedians C.J. & Emma share their stories of new flames - some doused & some allowed to let burn out of control! Enjoy this episode on further self-discovery & almost-lovery. Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of your choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged! Feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & subscribe to the YouTube channel “Screw Up the Podcast” for additional great content!
01:00:02
June 12, 2021
23. Screw Up the Morning [Re-release]
We're taking a week off to celebrate ourselves making peace with our Gods - and to try some caffeinated seltzers!  Hoo-ey, are we swamped, jacked, and quite literally blessed!  But instead of going dark on our valuable metrics (that's you, you hot little number), we've decided to share an older episode that we think deserves a bit more sunshine - that's right!  Fuck Folgers, welcome to the NEW best part of waking up!   Other than minding your own fucking business, of COURSE.  Hosted by Chicago Comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose. Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Thanks for listening Screw Crew & don’t forget to email if you hate that moniker or have other ideas of how in which you, the lovely listeners, would like to be referred: ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & share this ish with a friend who needs a laugh!
49:36
June 05, 2021
22. Screw Up the Friendship [Part Two]
*Trigger Warning for Topic of Suicide C.J. & Emma continue their conversation on the topics of friendships past & how depression & anxiety can play a major role in developing & maintaining healthy relationships...also they discuss which tropical fruits are f*ckable...because what else did you expect? 😅 Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of your choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged! Feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & subscribe to the YouTube channel “Screw Up the Podcast” for additional great content!
01:05:14
May 29, 2021
21. Screw Up the Friendship [Part One]
Chicago Comedians, C.J. & Emma explore the nuances of friendly relationships & ghostly departures. Don’t forget, you can check into a friendship...but you can absolutely check out too whenever you feel that the relationship is having a negative impact which cannot be resolved or should not if the resolution would hurt one or more parties involved. 😳 😅 Have you heard of YouTube?! Well, we have a channel “Screw Up the Podcast” & it is absolutely crawling with content so make sure to subscribe! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of your choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged! Feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & share this show with a friend who’s friendly friendship deserves a gift...that is free. 😉
59:04
May 22, 2021
20. Screw Up the Hygiene [Part Two]
If you thought C.J. & Emma were dirty ducks before, than this episode is really going to quack you up... ...please still listen even after that last sentence...this one is about hygiene again...we’re gonna need a bigger podcast 😳 Have you heard of YouTube?! Well, we have a channel “Screw Up the Podcast” & it is absolutely crawling with content so make sure to subscribe! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of your choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged! Feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & share this show with a friend who might need a laugh (or a bath)
53:44
May 15, 2021
19. Screw Up the Emergency
If you need medical help, you came to the right place because C.J. & Emma will have you in stitches as they talk candidly about some panic-inducing situations & some situation-inducing panic! If you need regular attention, then you also came to the right place because that means you can feel right at home with C.J. & Emma. *C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose are not medical professionals & so will not be held responsible for stitching or otherwise altering your being in any way. IF THIS IS NOT AN EMERGENCY, hang up the phone anyway & go to the YouTube channel “Screw Up the Podcast” Check out behind the scenes videos, TEST OUTs, & other fun content. Subscribe & comment to let them know that you visited & what you think. Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged so feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod.
56:57
May 08, 2021
18. Screw Up the Career Choice [Part 2]
You’re hired! For the position of “Listener” & you can start immediately because this episode of messy career missteps & the mishandled minds of middle management is available NOW on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Have you heard of YouTube?! Well, we have a channel “Screw Up the Podcast” & it is absolutely crawling with content so make sure to subscribe! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of your choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged! Feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & share this show with a friend who might need a laugh to get them through Spring cleaning season!
59:58
May 01, 2021
17. Screw Up the Career Choice [Part One]
Before Emma & C.J. were performers, they were children with Big Dreams! Big, Beautiful, Wet, Dreams! This discussion delves into theories about the gig economy, the importance of libraries, & C.J. & Emma’s shared childhood dream that turned into a whale of a nightmare for a certain species! Did you guess which animal yet? No, orkay, that’s fine, you’ll figure it out when you hear the episode! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of your choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged! Feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & share this show with a friend who might need a laugh to get them through Spring cleaning season! Have you heard of YouTube?! Well, we have a channel “Screw Up the Podcast” & it is absolutely crawling with content so make sure to subscribe!
01:02:53
April 24, 2021
16. Screw Up the Pest
C.J. & Emma are plagued with personal growth, infested with improvement, & overrun with omissions! Listen as they admit to having both pests & the most pestilent thing of all - shame. Have you heard of YouTube?! Well, hear of this - there is a “Screw Up the Podcast” channel & it is absolutely crawling with content so make sure to subscribe! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of your choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged! Feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & share this show with a friend who might need a laugh to get them through Spring cleaning season!
53:38
April 17, 2021
15. Screw Up the Religion [Part Two]
Chicagoland comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose continue their chat of churches, satanism, homophobia, & more with their unique blend of humorous chaos & harmless conjecture. Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod. You are always encouraged to email your screwed up stories of all kinds to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com. Don’t forget to check out C.J. & Emma’s YouTube Channel “Screw Up the Podcast” for behind the scenes videos & TEST OUTs, a video series in which buzzfeed quizzes are taken...a little too seriously. Amen
53:20
April 11, 2021
14. Screw Up the Religion [Part One]
Chicagoland comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose talk religiously & share a bit about what seems screwed up in the realm of religion! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod. You are always encouraged to email your screwed up stories of all kinds to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com. Don’t forget to check out C.J. & Emma’s YouTube Channel “Screw Up the Podcast” for behind the scenes videos & TEST OUTs, a video series in which buzzfeed quizzes are taken...a little too seriously.
01:24:52
April 03, 2021
13. Screw Up the Birthday
Have you been born? So have Chicagoland comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose & they have been screwing up ever since (& learning & growing from the screw ups!) Listen as C.J. & Emma ruin birthdays (their own & others!) 🥳 🎉 Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod. You are always encouraged to email your screwed up stories of all kinds to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com. C.J. & Emma’s YouTube Channel “Screw Up the Podcast” is born! Check it out for behind the scenes videos & TEST OUTs, a video series in which buzzfeed quizzes are taken...a little too seriously.
50:31
March 27, 2021
12. Screw Up the Hygiene [Part One]
This week’s episode of Screw Up is all about getting down & dirty & screwing up some products intended for hygiene (or hair removal!). Chicagoland comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose, can exude so many tales of hygiene faux pas they are drenched & need to make this topic at least a two-parter! Clever Pseudonym RETURNS for another of their hilarious letters of legends of Screw ups past! Remember, we can’t smell you through email! You are always encouraged to email your screwed up stories of all kinds to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com. Take a whiff of C.J. & Emma’s YouTube Channel “Screw Up the Podcast” for behind the scenes videos & TEST OUTs, a video series in which buzzfeed quizzes are taken...way too seriously. Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod.
58:28
March 20, 2021
11. Screw Up the Chompers
Sink your teeth into this week’s episode of Screw Up the Podcast in which Chicagoland comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose, open wide to spill the T about their screwed up teeth & screwed up experiences! Huge Shout Out to listener, Clever Pseudonym for their hilarious email read for you on this week’s episode! You are always encouraged to email your screwed up stories of all kinds to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Hey, it’s better than pulling teeth, check out C.J. & Emma’s YouTube Channel “Screw Up the Podcast” for behind the scenes videos & TEST OUTs, a video series in which buzzfeed quizzes are taken...way too seriously. Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod.
01:02:37
March 13, 2021
10. Screw Up the Finances
It doesn’t cost a thing to hear Chicago comedians, Emma Rose & C.J. Darnieder expose their misguided money mistakes! Also, this episode marks TEN glorious weeks of SCREW UP The Podcast! There have been some screw ups along the way but they have only fueled the fire that is this silly & wonderful comedy show! Free to a good home: C.J. & Emma “Screw Up the Podcast” on YouTube! Check out behind the scenes videos & TEST OUTs, a new video series in which buzzfeed quizzes are taken...way too seriously. 😂 Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged so feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod.
48:06
March 06, 2021
9. Screw Up the Production
Lights! Camera! Uh-Oh! Chicago comedians, Emma Rose & C.J. Darnieder wax nostalgic about their cringiest moments on stage & behind the scenes of productions pulsing with passion & puddling with perilousness. Watch C.J. & Emma “Screw Up the Podcast” on YouTube for behind the scenes videos & TEST OUT videos, an all new video series in which buzzfeed quizzes are taken...way too seriously. 😂 Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged so feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod.
01:04:14
February 27, 2021
8. Screw Up the Vote
Elect this episode as your podcast of choice to listen to today to hear Chicago comedians, Emma Rose & C.J. Darnieder vulnerably discuss how they may (or may not) have screwed up an American presidential election or two. Check out “Screw Up the Podcast” on YouTube for behind the scenes videos & TEST OUT, an all new video series by the creators of Screw Up! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged so feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod.
01:00:46
February 20, 2021
7. Screw Up the First Impression
First Impressions can be mildly misleading, dreadfully dead-on, & all variations in between. C.J. & Emma discuss some super screwed up initial introductions & as a special treat, discuss the infamous day of their first encounter with one another! Have you met the new “Screw Up the Podcast” YouTube channel? Pleased to make the acquaintance! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Introduce yourself to the hosts & send your stories of effed up first impressions to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod.
51:08
February 13, 2021
6. Screw Up the Diet
This week’s episode is a vulnerable deep dive into the world of diet & expectation. Chicago Comedians, Emma Rose & C.J. Darnieder have a tasty talk about body image, eating habits, & acceptance in this week’s delicious episode! Take a bite out of our brand new “Screw Up the Podcast” YouTube channel to get more juicy content! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged so feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod.
57:43
February 06, 2021
5. Screw Up the Commute
Hop on board with Chicagoland Comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose! They want you to join them on this week’s wild ride so that they can use the coveted carpool lane of life. Hear as C.J. discusses literal struggle buses & Emma talks...even when it is illegal to do so! Check out our brand new “Screw Up the Podcast” YouTube channel to put faces to voices & get more juicy content! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Stories from you, the beloved Screw Crew, are highly encouraged so feel free to reach out anytime to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on IG @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & share this show with a friend who might need a laugh to get them from point A to point B!
51:40
January 30, 2021
4. Screw Up the Morning
Rise & shine in this week’s episode of unblocking talks & shocking cocks! 🐓😳🐔 hosted by Chicago Comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose. Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, PocketCasts, RadioPublic, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe on your platform of choice! Thanks for listening Screw Crew & don’t forget to email if you hate that moniker or have other ideas of how in which you, the lovely listeners, would like to be referred: ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com Follow us on @ScrewUpThePodcast & on Twitter @ScrewUpThePod & share this ish with a friend who needs a laugh!
49:24
January 23, 2021
3. Screw Up in the Dark
Chicagoland Comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose discuss what can come to light when you screw up in the dark! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe, & feel free to reach out to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com & follow us on IG & Twitter @ScrewUpThePodcast We would love for you to share this podcast with a friend who needs a good laugh or who wants to feel a bit better about their own epic fails, trials, & tribulations!
44:14
January 16, 2021
2. Screw Up the Year 2020
Chicagoland Comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose talk screwing up in 2020, the year that felt like a mistake in & of itself but delivered some unexpected silver linings along the way! Listen to Screw Up the Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, Breaker, Castbox, Anchor.fm other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe, & feel free to reach out to ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com & follow us on IG & Twitter @ScrewUpThePodcast
51:28
January 09, 2021
1. Screw Up the 1990s!
Chicagoland Comedians, C.J. Darnieder & Emma Rose wax nostalgic & discuss their mistakes of the 1990s on this, the first episode of Screw Up the Podcast! Listen on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Overcast, Breaker, Castbox & other fav podcast streaming platforms! Feedback is always welcome so don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe, & feel free to reach out ScrewUpThePodcast@gmail.com
44:34
January 02, 2021