Self Control & Cheese

Sup babes. Today we're talkin' control - what it feels like when you have it and what it feels like when you don't. And how to regain a sense of control when you lose it. Let's be real - when control is taken away from you it can feel like you're a child who had their toys taken away. Any feedback feels like you're whining and you can't figure out how to level set like an adult again. We've been there. We hate that shit too. So we're here for the season 2 finale to talk about it. And as always, the most powerful way for you to regain control is by leaving a toxic work environment. We're here for you always. 

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kloveyoubye

Like no one is having a good time right now. What with the.... state of the US government, the world, and trying to get back to normal when things aren't normal, companies haven't figured out how to adjust and create employee engagement programs without culture being implied by an office. And it's starting to show with the great resignation, everyone feeling burnt out, people quitting their jobs left and right, and an overall bad vibe in the air. Companies need to use the money they're saving in rent and put it towards making their employees happy. Cause right now we're all tired, kind of sad, and just ready for hot girl summer at this point.... 

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kloveyoubye

Hey bestie. You asking yourself if it's time to find a new job? Or you're questioning how you know when it's time to find a new job? News flash - that probably means it's time for a new job. When companies are looking out for themselves, you have to look out for you. And you know what's ok? Not spending years at a company before you move, looking out for yourself and your career path, and not always being a team player. It's ok not to be a team player if the game is fundamentally rigged against you. So we're joined by the one and only John Thomas Lang who drops some knowledge on looking out for yourself and your career. 

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kloveyoubye

Hey besties here's the thing: we're rooting for you. Like straight up and full stop. We think you're doing great. We think you're putting in work. And we think you're chugging along, feelin' good about work AND life. And we positively love that for you. We just wanted to come on here and say that sometimes it's cool to just be vibing and have no hot takes. We don't think week, our hot take is that we're proud of you lmao. 

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kloveyoubye

So you got laid off. That fucking sucks. We would never deny that and think you should go through the 5 stages of grief before you're really ready to figure out what comes next. But whenever you feel like you're ready to figure out what comes next for you, it can feel foreboding, scary, unknown, alone. Here's the great news, you're not alone. Being laid off is a lonely and individual experience, but there are so many people just like you who got back on their feet and learned and evolved from the experience. Whenever you're ready to do that, this episode is for you. 

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kloveyoubye

Don't even lie - you don't either. Listen the 8 hour work day/40 hour work week was created for factory lines to get the most out of the workers as possible. We're B2B marketers working behind computer screens all day. Most of our work each day can be accomplished in 3-4 hours of uninterrupted work. The thing is... we are usually interrupted. By people either virtually or physically. And that's FINE. Make those distractions for yourself sometimes. We weren't working all 8 hours we were in the office every day. We were out and about, changing up where we were working from, stopping by a co-workers desk to ask a question, or just going outside for some air. Do that at home. You're allowed and you should. 

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kloveyoubye

When you figure out what your thing is, it makes it 100x easier to find jobs for YOU. When you know exactly what you want and how to find companies that'll let you do what you want, and help you grow more into who you want to be, your career becomes more fun and more valuable. Ryan McCready knows his thing. And so when the time came for him to make a change in his career, he knew exactly what to look for and what to do. So in this episode Ryan is breaking down his latest career search and how he weeded out opportunities he KNEW weren't right for him. If you're thinking it may be time for your next thing, listen to this before you start your search. 

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kloveyoubye

Dudes. Like. We have so much time to figure it out. To figure out what we want our next move to be. To figure out what our career should look like. To figure out what we're going to focus on at work next quarter. Big things don't happen in 24 hours. Big things happen over weeks, months, and years. It's ok to have shitty days and shitty weeks. Because as long as you're moving forward, things are happening, you are changing, and you're getting closer. 

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kloveyoubye

Oh what's that? A bonus episode of our get hired in tech series? Hell yeah fuckin right it is - you are so welcome. Adam Goyette is the VP of Marketing at HelpScout and has had a proven track record of finding the right companies that best suit his life at different points in his career. Sometimes that meant working 12 hour days, sometimes that means being a working parent and needing flexibility in his schedule. Working in tech isn't a one and done choice - you can and should evolve your working environment to suit the life you want to be living and the way you want to spend your time. So in this episode we're breaking down what stage of a tech startup may best suit you at different points in your life - so you can make the best decision for you. 

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kloveyoubye

Basically - fake it till you make it. People newer to the working world, and especially underrepresented minorities in the workplace, aren't as likely to act like they're levels above what they actually are in the workplace. But that's exactly what we should all be doing - managing up, faking it until we make it, doing the job we want before we get promoted into it (up until a certain point) all helps you grow in your career. It helps you show your managers that you are incredibly capable of doing your job, it allows you to work on projects that you actually want to work on, and it shows your peers that you're an indirect leader they can go to with questions, concerns, or advice. And the advice comes straight from the mouth of Sara's mentor Jess, who we're obsessed with so you know it's legit. 

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kloveyoubye

On this episode of "literally nobody taught me this shit", we're talking about the un-sexy part of working in startups: understanding your offer package. From stock options vs RSUs to understanding your benefits package and the legal clauses you have to agree to, it can all be overwhelming, feel like it doesn't make a lot of sense, and overall take away the excitement from starting a new job. But don't you dare even fret my friends because we are here to decode this shit for you. We'll break down how to understand each part of your offer so you know what to negotiate and what is standard. If you ever have any questions, we are definitely not finance or legal professionals but we'd be happy to help answer some of your questions! 

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kloveyoubye

Hi friendsssss. There's a reason we started this podcast - because we liked the work that we do, we're damn good at it, and we grew quickly to where we wanted to give tips to people who were in a similar boat. All of this to say, it's 10000% ok to like your job, to love your job even, but you still don't have to make your entire life your job. Balancing what makes you passionate in life (you should have more than 1 passion, in our opinion) can help you show up stronger and better when you're not hyper focused on one thing. Don't put all your eggs in one basket alright everyone? Enjoy.

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kloveyoubye

It's episode 2 of our "Get Hired In Tech" series and this one is all about how to impress during each round of interviews you'll inevitably do for the hiring process at a tech company. From what to expect, when to bring up compensations, better questions to ask, AND better answers to questions, we hope these tips will help you feel more comfortable in interviews with any company for any kind of job. 

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kloveyoubye

We all know that guy Rod on TikTok who makes super relatable videos about being an anxious person in the workplace, right? Well we're here to letchya know that there's no need to fret. If you have a good, positive relationship with your manager - they 👏 do 👏 not 👏 hate 👏 you. They may be a little short over Slack or Teams, but that's literally only because they're managing people and a workload and probably messaging you in between or during meetings. It's ok, it's all going to be ok. 

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kloveyoubye

Hi besties, welcome to a 3 part series all about how to get hired in tech - specifically tech startups. People love to glorify what it's like to work in tech but then gatekeep how the heck they actually ended up at the company. We do not gatekeep in this house so we're giving you all our secrets on how we broke into the industry, grew quickly, and started making some serious money just a few years out of college. First part of the series? How to land the interview - from resume tips to answering questions like "Should I really write a cover letter" and "Do I need a portfolio" we've got you covered. 

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kloveyoubye

They say to never meet your heroes but guess what? We did and she fucking rules. Meet Amber Naslund - an author, a speaker, a virtual mentor to 77.8k twitter followers and someone we've looked up to for a long ass time. Amber has been through some shit, she recently pivoted her entire career, and she does so with grace, with embracing the hard shit that would break most people, and with a lot of honesty. She doesn't beat around the bush with things fucking suck and she wants to do something about them. So please, enjoy this conversation with Amber and hopefully we can all learn to be as resilient as she is. 

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kloveyoubye

Just like we don't all learn the same, we don't all work the same either. This week we got to sit down with Freelancer extraordinaire Brooklin Nash, who went in-house after freelancing most of his career for science. Literally just to see what it was like. Two years later and he's back on his freelancing game, writing and strategizing for the biggest names in B2B Marketing and sharing what he's learned about his professional aspirations and how you can quit your job and go freelance full time too, but only if you want. 

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kloveyoubye

Oh what's that? A hot take WITH A GUEST? Yeah it's 2022 and we're switching things up because we make the rules and we can do what we want. Today we're bringing the HEAT to warm up the cold, cold winter, all about why you can be really fucking good at your job no matter what age you are. There's a lot of ageism in the workplace, not just to younger people but to older people as well. But here's the damn thing - it literally doesn't matter how old you are if you're doing good work. Point blank period. We spend most of the ep talking about being more youthful in the workplace because that's what we know. And we also know we're really good at our jobs regardless of what year we were born. HAPPY NEW YEAR and enjoy!

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kloveyoubye

If you haven't had a conversation with Jacob Gebrewold, you're sorely missing out. He's a delight, charismatic, and knows how to get shit DONE. In this episode he takes us through step by step how he landed a new job, in a new industry, without the experience the company was looking for. Because he's just that good, he knows what he wants, and he leverages his network as his greatest strength. He shares is playbook into how he got the job with the receipts to match. 

Learn how Jacob landed his job here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1udIB55TGiuhCInl6b5YiEEO0cxIgJBQ5H5bUfcfDEWs/edit

Learn what Jacob looks like in a role here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gAoACRFlHF3fAsi_nreYBvXwyZn2zqitT1GPAQ3zIF0/edit

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kloveyoubye

Have you ever looked around a room and thought to yourself "Do I have a god complex or am I the only person in this room thinking critically?" Because SAME. Sometimes you get put into a situation where not everyone thinks like you do, not everyone is willing to speak up about their ideas, and you end up being the person who's leading every conversation. If that happens there are a few things you can do: 

1. If the people leaving it up to you are hierarchically above you, it may be time to start thinking about what you want from a company. 

2. If the people are your teammates or peers, it can be a great time to start taking on a more managerial role. Start to delegate out and assign tasks to people who many not be willing to volunteer themselves. 

Regardless, you are the sum of the 5 people you spend the most time around at work - make sure those people are making you better, not bringing you down. 

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kloveyoubye

You'll never find your dream job and you know what? THAT'S FINE. YOU DON'T HAVE TO HAVE A DREAM JOB. Sorry for yelling but it is so very possible to be happy and fulfilled at your job, find joy in other things outside of work, and be living your own dream. In fact, we think it's incredibly important to be passionate about something outside of work. Y'know, so you're a well-rounded and interesting person and don't just talk about work all day. Because then no one wants to sit next to you at Thanksgiving. So stop fretting about finding the job with no problems and instead spend your time focusing on the problems you have the patience and desire to solve instead. 

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kloveyoubye

Because these founders out here are kinda wild fam. Inevitably, when you join a startup or even a mid-size company, the culture is going to be created by the founders. Whether that's good or bad is another question. What you want to look out for is founders, senior leaders, or hiring managers who don't talk about culture, because then you know it's boring and it sucks. What you ALSO want to look out for are founders looking to hire employees that'll give them a confirmation bias and just agree with every shitty idea they have because they tie all of their self worth to their company even though it's not really going anywhere. So we're giving you some pointers on questions you can ask and people you can talk to when looking at a company to make sure you're not getting yourself into a shitty situation disguised as a "rocket-ship opportunity" 🙄

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kloveyoubye

Y'all wanna hear us talk about how we failed for 26 minutes and why it's ok? MY GAWD are you in luck. Especially when you're early on in your career or new to a company and are eager to prove yourself, that can sometimes lead you to overworking yourself, then not having the time to do a few things of high quality, and inevitably fucking something up. But you gotta deal with it. Because people will remember and respect you for the way you dealt with your failure, not by the failure itself. Ok? And obviously we still love you.

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kloveyoubye

Ok so here's the thing. We've all seen some straight up DUMB takes on social media that have gotten way too much engagement. It feels like we're taking crazy pills because the content is just so..... bland. And if we were to guess, the people who have mediocre thoughts are generally performing in a mediocre fashion at work because they prioritizing their social media presence over their work. And then there are people who are amazing to work with, incredibly smart and mindful, great at their jobs and silent on social media. That's FINE. Activity on social media does not mean that you show up to work every day and crush it at your job. Unless of course your job is to be active on social media but that's a hot take for a different day. 

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kloveyoubye

Heyyyyyy, so the job market right now? Absolutely fuego for candidates and we are HERE for it. Of course, we love a good trend so we had to participate in The Great Resignation and both got new jobs. So on this episode we're covering the do's and don'ts for your first week at a new gig. Hint: Don't be a dick who thinks they know everything with no context. No matter how much experience you have, you are new to a team and need to gain context before you can actually execute in a noteworthy way. So we give you some examples on how you can get more context, quicker while still feeling like you're "doing stuff" your first few weeks at a new job. Enjoy!

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kloveyoubye

Alright so we all know we're very goal and work oriented. We literally made a podcast about career growth. So when we don't produce something tangible at the end of the day we can get kinda hard on ourselves. And by we, we mean Sara. But there's a way to make thinking, researching, mulling something over, feel productive and like you accomplished something for your day. Here's how. 

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kloveyoubye

We are back with a frikin VENGEANCE, episode 2 of season 2 and you're already blessed with a guest. Not just any guest, but THE Brendan Hufford: Founder of SEO for the Rest of Us and Growth Sprints, creator of the All-in Community, and an SEO consultant. Oh yeah and for his day job he's a Growth Content Marketer. 

We talk about accepting yourself, working and learning through situations that may not be ideal to your working style, and why Brendan has 57 side hustles. Enjoy!

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kloveyoubye

Just a quick one for you all today. A reminder that we all need Google to do our jobs and there's nothing wrong with that. In fact, lean into it. Instead of asking a question where you could get the answer if you do 2 more seconds of critical thinking.... DO that critical thinking. Sometimes you just gotta slow down, remind yourself that the answer is definitely out there, and then ask better questions if documentation isn't helping you, ok? We still love you no matter what tho. 

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kloveyoubye

Oh hey what's up HULLO everyone! We had a summer, we lived our lives, we are now BACK and literally better than ever. After a whole ass summer of Bridget living her best live and Sara moving across the country, we are back to chat. And what better topic to discuss after a 4 month long hiatus than the thing that's making every employer quake in their boots: The Great Resignation. We'll talk about what to look for in a new company, how you know it's time to leave even if your environment isn't toxic, and why a new role isn't always about the job you'll be doing but the environment in which you'll be working. 

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kloveyoubye

First of all.... Can we talk about the new branding? How frikin SLICK are we, right?!?!? Ok so anywho this is our Season 1 finale. You heard us, we're doing seasons now, wanna know why? Because we can. We are both trying to have a relaxing summer filled with non-work related activities and we just don't want to be thinking about and talking about work when we could be at the beach. Sue us. But we've got big ass plans for season 2 so listen on to hear about why we chose to take a break, what you can expect from us next season, and the best cheese we ate in season 1. 

Love you all like you wouldn't believe. 

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kloveyoubye

Hey besties, Bridge is fresh off of a long weekend trip and we thought it'd be the perfect time to remind you to TAKE. YOUR. VACATION. DAYS. Take them. See the world, explore, or just lay in your bed and recharge. There needs to be more to you than your work, ok? If you are given vacation days, we are literally begging you to take them. You're not irreplaceable, you're not the lynchpin in your organization, you need to sit down. Take care of yourself, ok? Love you. 

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kloveyoubye 

Let's be real homies, not everyone is motivated the same way. If you're just looking to hire people who are motivated the way you are, your company's going to straight up implode. We're just two impatient, ambitious gals who are actually terrified of being called lazy and so we will do everything in our power not to be. BUT everyone will have to work with someone who can fly under the radar and not pull their weight. And kudos to those people for hacking the system I guess?? But we'd still like to get our shit done. So here are some tips on how to work with people with different motivation types, ok??  

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kloveyoubye

Alright here's the deal fam: We're not going to be that generation that just stays at a toxic, slow moving/dead end job for 35 years. We're looking out for ourselves and our career paths and to do that you need to experience some shit. That usually happens when you work at different companies. And sometimes when you do that, you accidentally find a toxic company and you want to GTFOutta there, quickly. But you don't want it to look bad on your resume. Well, we don't think that's a deal breaker. If anything, it can be a conversation starter that you should know how to answer in an interview, but shouldn't hinder you from spreading your wings and finding a better place for ya ok?? Ok great, we're proud of you. 

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kloveyoubye

We're prioritizing ourselves in 2021 ok? Being selfish isn't always a negative - you can be selfish about your career path without burning bridges and creating a network of raving fans who will back you up along the way. 

There are a few things you should be selfish about: Your growth, your time, and what you do and do not like to do. Let us break it down for you. 

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kloveyoubye

And you know what? So are we. It's recreational in Massachusetts and Illinois so this is a no narc ZONE. Thanks. 🙅‍♀️But seriously, tens of millions of adults are recreational or medicinal users of cannabis and ya girls use it to relax our minds - because very few other things will. This is a judgement free zone so... Blaze it ✌️

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kloveyoubye

Burnout sucks absolute butt. It usually means you're onto some sort of large growth path but right now you're straight up not having a good time.  Getting yourself out of burntout is also hard - because of course it is. It takes a lot of self awareness, a lot of patience and self compassion, and a lot of you doing nothing.  For those of us who like to get shit done, burnout is the literal last thing we want to happen, but it will and here's how to get yourself out of it.  --- Make sure to leave a review and subscribe so we can keep making dope ass content for you. Follow us on twitter: @selfcontrol_chz Check out our website, join our email list, be the first to know when we have shit to say: selfcontrolandcheese.com/join-us kloveyoubye

Oh shit what's that??? A BONUS EPISODE BITCH. We answered your q's, from work pet peeves, what we're most proud of, to buffalo vs goat cheese and our 3 favorite cheese pairings. We just wanted to come on and hang out just us two and answer your questions cause this is our podcast and we'll do what we want to! But let us know if you liked it cause if you hate it then we wont do it again lol.  

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Yeah. Bummer to find out, we know. But it's easy to romanticize promotions like you would a relationship, but no one's gonna know exactly what you want unless you tell them, OK? Whether it's review szn or you're having career conversations with your boss, you need to make it clear exactly what you expect based on your performance, and if you're given an offer you get that shit in writing QUICKLY. Advocate for yourself bb, you're worth it. 

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kloveyoubye

So Danielle is 24 and owns a media company. ahaha. FUCK. But the cool thing about her is that she's down to earth as fuck, is already a servant leader, is a consistent student, and builds her company the way she wants to. 

She walks us through when you know its time for you to start your own thing, why it's not for everyone, how the feedback loop differs from clients versus direct managers, and what cheese is currently in her fridge right now. 

You're going to want to grab your pen and paper for this one. 

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kloveyoubye

Remove. The. Filler. Words. In. Your. Sentences. "I just", "I think", "I wanted to see if", no. Bad. Stop that. Write out your thoughts as fact. Write out your observations as statements. Write out your asks as demands. You're not bothering people by sharing your opinions, ideas, and observations so don't diminish them by using words that diminish them, you silly goose. Go on with your bad self, we love your ideas and everyone else will too. 

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kloveyoubye

Or his alternate title: How To Be Gay, Hot, And Successful. Are you bought in yet? Dan Kurtz is a friend of the pod, recently promoted manager, and a man with an immense amount of self awareness when it comes to what he's good at and what he needs to work on. It's incredibly refreshing and interesting to hear about Dan's experience in retail being some of the most formative professional years of his life, how he deals with giving and receiving negative feedback, and why your choice of words really matter. 

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kloveyoubye 

Ok but like for real, you know a group of people are marginalized when they have their own day/week/month... Just sayin'. Respect women, respect intersectional femininity, and if you think people are asking for your opinion when they haven't... Then don't share your opinion. Really and truly, nobody asked and we hate you for it now. Not sorry. Moral of the story: Give women jobs, pay them their worth, let them be bad bitches and if you have anything negative to say keep your mouth closed. G'bye. 

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kloveyoubye

You ever just get every question you ever had and more answered in one conversation? WELL YOU'RE ABOUT TO! Benyamin Elias isn't just another one of our internet friends, he's someone we seriously look up to when it comes to growing your career sustainably. This mans walked us through managing people older than you, what it means to be a manager vs director, how to manage people who's job you couldn't do, and so much more. What a guy, amiright? Well you'll find out. 

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kloveyoubye

It's a tough pill to swallow but here it is: Your company doesn't care as much about you as you may think. Companies exist to make money, not to build your career path for you, so ultimately you will need to learn how to be your best and biggest cheerleader. Having the confidence to know you're a bad bitch can help you find the context around why decisions are made, why you were or weren't involved, and inherently help you get to where you need to go. So go on with your bad self. 

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kloveyoubye

This isn't one of those "thought leadership-y" type of conversations because what really happened was Katie dropped knowledge for 32 minutes and Bridget and Sara just kind of sat there, mouth agape, writing down every little thing Katie taught us during this time. 

There's something to be said about people who have accomplished so much in such a short period of time. Are they legit? Can I replicate what they've done? What's worth it and what isn't when it comes to growth? All of those questions, and a BUNCH more are answered in this conversation. 

We loved it, we love Katie, we think you will too. 

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Basically Sara cries in this one and Bridget's a fucking angel. 

But seriously, career growth and professional development isn't cute and pretty and rainbows and butterflies all the time. 

That's the whole thing about growth is that it's disgustingly hard, otherwise we'd all be running shit from the day we were born. So this is just a reminder that what you're going through is valid and we're here for you.

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kloveyoubye

Sometimes it can take a whole lot of courage to stand up for what you believe in and maintain that stance. People will try to tear you down and staying strong in your convictions can sometimes feel like more work than it's worth. 

Well, not to this week's guest. Amanda Neilsen isn't afraid to stick up for what she believes in and take those feelings to the grave. A fierce advocate for diversity, equity, and inclusion, the shit-poster of her company, Amanda is just so specifically herself. Take her or leave her. 

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kloveyoubye

Suhh dudes. This week's hot take was inspired but a tweet that made Sara nauseous that said something like: "You know you have a personal brand when people talk about it at the dinner table".

Cue Sara and Bridget vomiting. Dudes. There needs to be more to you than your job. For your sake and for the sake of literally everyone around you. No one ever wants to talk about work at a party, so you need to have more shit going on. It's not a flex to have your family only talk to you about work. That's sad. Don't do that. 

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kloveyoubye