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Septic Safe

Septic Safe

By Margaret and Jenny

Two silly comedian besties who love talking about their BMs, ramblings on daily nonsense, irrational fears and other shit they think is funny.
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Currently playing episode

Panty Sniffer - Episode 11

Septic SafeAug 02, 2022

00:00
24:01
Chicken Sh!t - Episode 20

Chicken Sh!t - Episode 20

Jenny and Margaret welcome you to Episode 20, aka Season 1 Finale (it only took 4 years to get here)! 

Listen as they talk about basic bitch shit, like Fall & Halloween and then get ready to hear them talk about fried chicken sandwiches, smash burgers, bread (and Marc Maron), gnocchi and more! 

As we close out Season 1, we want to thank our audience for joining us each week and a special thanks to the two of you who sent in questions for us to answer! While your favorite podcast ever takes a little break, please be sure to stay tuned in to our Instagram as we plan on filling your grid with many more laughs to hold you over in the meantime. 

Remember kids, wipe front to back, use your butt wipes (don't flush em') and always hit that courtesy flush for others. We'll be talking shit soon!

Oct 06, 202218:53
House of the Dookie - Episode 19

House of the Dookie - Episode 19

Jenny gives us an update on her cat's constipation, Margaret takes us back to the OG 9/11 as random stories are strewn throughout this sloppy mess of an episode. Learn more about the ladies of the podcast (including if one of them is into the incest "subplot" in House of the Dragon) and be sure to check out Instagram to participate in a new and exciting contest the team is hosting!

Sep 28, 202220:10
Autotune Your Butthole - Episode 18

Autotune Your Butthole - Episode 18

Margaret and Jenny discuss Nick Cannon’s baby cannon, fucking avocados making you feel like a chump and hear their voices autotuned for the first time! You just might laugh till you cry!
Sep 21, 202218:17
Uptown Turds - Episode 17

Uptown Turds - Episode 17

Jenny and Margaret discuss slowing down in life and how that caused a turtle’s unfortunate death. The team taste tests a random seltzer flavor, runners trots are explained as well as the latest gossip over a new Hollywood movie that doesn’t actually matter. Food fetishes are brought to life alongside tales of gyno visits and a hatred of Billy Joel is explained.

Sep 13, 202221:56
Taste the Poop Rainbow! - Episode 16

Taste the Poop Rainbow! - Episode 16

Jenny and Margaret discuss how many f*cks there are in The Big Lebowski, sharing your poo with friends, and wonder why poocorn is the snack off the movies?! Plus SO much more!
Sep 06, 202222:34
Butt Records - Episode 15

Butt Records - Episode 15

Margaret and Jenny shares tales of dead pets *trigger warning, killing the vibe at a party, cum tampons and more!
Sep 01, 202220:11
Stealin' Sh!t - Episode 14

Stealin' Sh!t - Episode 14

Jenny and Margaret revisit past transgressions, bowel movements are discussed as well as the shitty things men from their pasts have said to them. Stay tuned in to hear some fun memories from school dances of the 90's as well as find out if Axl Rose is still alive. 

Aug 23, 202227:24
Talkin’ Sh!t - Episode 13

Talkin’ Sh!t - Episode 13

Jenny regals Margaret with tales from her hair chair, personal vagina stories are shared and hear our producer Jay’s laughs of horror as we get into Episode 13!

Aug 17, 202221:41
Poo-Poo Party Surprise - Episode 12

Poo-Poo Party Surprise - Episode 12

Tune is as Jenny shares a poo story mishap and ins(poo)rational quotes while Margaret reviews how to sell your used panties online. Listen on to hear how the ladies would spend their day if they had a dick. Another listener's question is answered. 

Aug 09, 202222:43
Panty Sniffer - Episode 11

Panty Sniffer - Episode 11

Tater Pox!! Buy used panties on Sniffer! Margaret teaches Jenny how to say Cuba Gooding Jr.’s first name properly!
Aug 02, 202224:01
¡Dirty Diez! - Episode 10

¡Dirty Diez! - Episode 10

Celebrate Episode 10 with Jenny and Margaret as they discuss the side effects of herbal abortions, why thongs have got to go and find out which Saved by the Bell character they’d bang!

Jul 26, 202229:35
A Turd in the Wormhole - Episode 9

A Turd in the Wormhole - Episode 9

Margaret and Jenny discuss reusable toilet paper, Lindsay Lohan’s redemption and a very awkward moment with a beard.
Jul 20, 202224:19
Mourning Complete - Episode 8

Mourning Complete - Episode 8

Margaret and Jenny discuss a relevant life hack, why apple watches can go fuck themselves and being bullied. Good times!
Jul 12, 202225:22
Fire in the Hole! - Episode 7

Fire in the Hole! - Episode 7

This episode is gonna fire you right up! Abortion rights- gone! Elvis's bowels- full! And honestly, there's never a good time to take Dulcolax.
Jul 07, 202225:37
On The Reg - Episode 6

On The Reg - Episode 6

Jenny and Margaret discuss which deodorants work for them, what taco seasoning actually smells like, toilet paper preferences, skinny shaming and if it's okay to use GoFundMe for plastic surgery. 

Jun 28, 202225:28
Drop it Like It's Hot! - Episode 5

Drop it Like It's Hot! - Episode 5

Catch up with Jenny & Margaret as they piece together what's changed since you last heard from them in 2018!

Jun 21, 202226:34
Does a Bear Shit in the Woods? - Episode 4

Does a Bear Shit in the Woods? - Episode 4

Jenny and Margaret talk about their weekends, spoilers, current affairs, a headless old person, a brand new sponsor, and a hemorrhoid remedy. Oh, also a new celebrity death prediction. (Jenny is clicking a pen periodically during the podcast. She won't do it again)...
Jul 09, 201828:11
Deuces Wild! - Episode 3

Deuces Wild! - Episode 3

Jenny and Margaret chit chat about summer, unrealistic fears, hang nail awareness month, and other kookie topics. Who will be the next celebrity death prediction?
Jul 02, 201825:24
Hit the Bowl - Episode 2

Hit the Bowl - Episode 2

Jenny and Margaret discuss recent food poisoning, body image anectodes, and a new diet trend. Shit will also be talked along with the announcement of the first round of celebrity death predictions.
Jun 25, 201819:40
Septic Safe, Courtesy Flush - Episode 1

Septic Safe, Courtesy Flush - Episode 1

Jenny and Margaret introduce you to their new, hilariously flushable podcast.
Jun 19, 201821:33