Somebody Write This

"3 friendly locals uncover a family secret in the local church." What is the family secret? Whose family is it? And whose loyalty is required? We've got our guest, B. McGraw, here to figure it out with us! Find his book "Et Al" on Amazon or follow him on jabde.com, @jabde6 on Twitter, or on his subreddit, r/immaterialscience.

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"In 1960s Los Angeles, a new business partner, Hades, and the new Italian cowboys find the real killer." Who are the new Italian cowboys? Why are they in business with Hades? And is that... THE Mr. Rogers? Our guest Quinn Que is here to work through this with us! Follow him basically everywhere @edokwin and you can find his writing on his substack, "The Edokwin Editorial."

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"In a microscopic community, Ichabod Argyle and his friend Graham Pease have obtained a custody battle and end up on a soul-searching journey across America." Those may be the best-named characters our podcast has ever seen, but what does the rest of it mean? Our guest Kylar Merrell is here to figure it out! You can read Outlaw Country, listen to the playlist, and follow his new work at foreignpresscomics.com.

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"Two British Agents ally with the Dark Lord to see booming business." Which Dark Lord is this? What kind of business are they hoping to boom? And which of them is Carly? Our guest Michael Todd Gallowglas is here to work through all of this! Find him and his work online at https://mtoddgallowglas.com/

"A group of beautiful yet troubled twenty-somethings rebuild her life after she is most understanding in bars." Whose life are they rebuilding? Why is she so understanding? Does this all take place in the late 1940? Our guest, author Esme Symes-Smith, is here to help us work out all these details! Check out their Sir Callie book series, starting with "Sir Callie and the Champions of Halston," and you can also find them online at esymessmith.com.

"In the 1950s, Jerry's ambitious kid sister Cindy winds up undertaking a search for love and self in a quest to vanquish three teenagers." What did the teenagers do to deserve vanquishing? How does Jerry play into his sister's search for love and self? And what exactly is the Nile of New Orleans? Our guest Mary Mascari helps us answer these questions and more. Don't forget to check out Mary's scripted podcast "Vennix the Mighty" on your favorite podcast app!

"Two known counter-culture figures become dangerously rural after witnessing a multi-billion eternal life." How is that a thing you can witness? What makes being rural dangerous? And how does anti-government hysteria fit in? We’re joined by our guest Jason Luna (as well as guest co-host Bethany Megill, who jumped in when we weren’t sure Jennie would make it!) to unravel this story.

"When a family's maid gets himself killed, they escape from prison." How does he get himself killed? Why are they all in prison? And why do they want a book? Our guest storyteller Peter Fenton is here to work it out -- and largely without Hannah's help, as her audio only half saved on the recording. But Jennie and Peter have the story in capable hands and we were able to cobble together a mostly-coherent story regardless. This one was too good to leave on the cutting room floor! Check out Peter's work @peterfent and on bypeterfenton.com.

"Shortly after being involved in a web of corruption, Sarah becomes tied to a mysterious house." How is Sarah involved? How is the house involved? While we're at it, how is a school involved? Our guest Ally Liddell joins us on this episode to try to untangle this (sometimes literal) web.

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

We've hit 100 episodes and 4 years of podcasting, and to celebrate, we're inviting a couple of our previous guests to look back at some of our favorite episodes and read absolutely ridiculous AI-written scripts of them. Turns out we still need people for writing stories, because the computers do NOT get it.

Here's to 100 more brainstorming sessions!

Our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"When his girlfriend's family has a loving family to support him, he is transformed into pirates." What exactly is this family dynamic? What life choices is he feeling inferior about? And hold on, he's transformed into pirates, plural? Our guest Charlie Jane Anders helps to make sense of this bizarre beginning! Follow her on Instagram @charliejaneanders and check out her latest work on the Unstoppable trilogy and the New Mutants comics!

"A shy retelling of Shakespeare's 'Macbeth' set at a major company." What major company? How is this retelling shy? And how does the title fit in? Our guest Tina Gallagher is here to make it fit! You can find her online @tinagallagherauthor, or at tinagallagherbooks.com.

"A slovenly cable repairman infiltrates the streets of Manhattan in order to reach his son." Where is the repairman's son? Which of them is a communist? And how exactly does he infilitrate Manhattan's streets? Our guest Chaz Hayden is here to help is work it all out! Follow him online at @thechazhayden and look for his debut novel, "The First Thing About You."

"When Russia's first nuclear submarine malfunctions, a group of beautiful yet troubled twenty-somethings must race to leave her lover." Who is her lover? Which one is the scheming ex? And how does a nuclear submarine fit into all this? Our guest, author Jacqueline Carey, is here to help us fit it all together! Check out more of her and her work at jacquelinecarey.com.

Hannah started a new job last week and completely blanked on getting this week's episode edited and posted -- gah! But just to make sure you still have something on this Thursday, here's a rerun of one of our favorite episodes from December 2021, a romance starring the actor Woody Harrelson as himself.

"A strange old man has a series of surreal encounters with a nurse while becoming torn between following his orders and protecting the world he feels is his home." Well, that sounds ominous... What are his orders? Is he Kay or Clarice? Melissa & Robert of The Haunted Tales Podcast join us to work it all out! You can find them and their work on Twitter @hauntedtalespod and on Instagram @hauntedtalespodcast. (And we hear a rumor that they might even be creating a special episode based on this plot synopsis, so make sure you check that one out!)

"The schemes of a professional monster hunter who will stop at nothing to celebrate the artistic work of their father." What artistic work? Why is it so important to the monster hunter? And who are the two roomies? Our guest Jeneta St. Clair helps us work through all of these questions! Find her on Instagram at @jenetastclair, her show @dryshow_wetcomics, and keep an eye out for the short film Marque Dos, which she appears in!

"The struggle of the peaceful settlers of a town destined for railroad greatness's legal feud over a robbery." What kind of legal feud involves a robbery? Are all the settlers involved? And WHAT do we do with that title? Our guest Heidi Voss is here to help answer those questions! You can follow her at authorheidivoss.com, and if you sign up for her newsletter you'll get a free short story.

"The true story of pirates who spy on his boss's old mentor." Why are pirates spying on someone? What is the old mentor doing? And, well, this isn't actually a true story, right? Our guest Alexander Weinstein is here to help us work it all out! You can find him and his work at alexanderweinstein.com. You can also watch the film After Yang, which was based on his short story "Saying Goodbye to Yang."

"A professor of chemistry dates other women to distract a headstrong young girl." How is dating women a distraction? Is one of these women named Mona Lebowski? And how does the small town play into it? Our guest Cecelia Mecca is here to help us work it all out! You can find her medieval romance under her name here and her contemporary romance work under Bella Michaels. Find her @ceceliamecca on social media!

"Two former secretaries come up with a money-making promotion to train Merlin's descendant." Who is Merlin's descendant? Why do they need money to train them? And what does this have to do with Hawaiian real estate? Our guest Rap Critic is here to help us work it all out! You can find him and his work here:

https://www.youtube.com/@RapCritic

https://www.patreon.com/rapcritic

https://ko-fi.com/rapcritic

https://www.twitch.tv/rapcritic

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"Big time show winners throw a sorrow party in a fascist, militaristic future." What's a sorrow party? Is every party in a fascist future a sorrow party? How are letters involved? Our guest Matthew Marcus is a Jeopardy champion, so something of a big time show winner himself, so hopefully he can shine some light on this. If Matthew's trivia journey inspired you, he suggests you go find the Online Quiz League and go get involved!

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"When a research team calling themselves 'the unofficial Christmas truce' reclaims his life, urbane Princess Jeremy Warner is assigned to join the Church of England." Oh my. That's a whole lot to unpack. Thankfully we have our guest Laure Porché AND guest co-host Kirsten Porter here to make this all work out!

You can find Laure's podcast, The Moonlit Path, anywhere you get your podcasts, or directly on her website at: https://www.laureporche.com/podcast-1

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"During England, his girlfriend's parents flee to a remote island in hope of proving their innocence." How can you prove your innocence on a remote island? Is the island full of deadly ancient curses? And... what on earth does "during England" mean as a setting? Thankfully our guest Lynnie Westafer is here to work it all out with us! You can find her and her work at lynniewestafer.com

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"A convicted arsonist accepts the challenge of entering the fifth grade." Why is an arsonist going to elementary school? What makes being there a challenge? And... what does this title mean? Our guest David Schell is here to give us a hand in putting it all together.

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"When things are tense, his past is shown in flashbacks." Well, that's wide open. Whose past? Why flashbacks? And what does his restaurant's doorstep legend have to do with it? Our guest author Boo Walker joins us to flesh out this vague beginning.

Find Boo online at boowalker.com, where you can sign up for his newsletter and find his social media. And don't forget to check out his latest novel, "A Spanish Sunrise."

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"Two femme fatales have a pact to propose to his girlfriend, if they haven’t investigated a complex and mysterious case of blackmail and missing keys at a military school." Um. What? And also... what? Our guest Brianne Leeson helps us figure out what's going on in this exceptionally complicated story.

Check out Brianne's audio drama Today's Lucky Winner wherever you get your podcasts, or on social media @luckywinnershow. If you're seeking some peer support coaching for a late neurodivergence diagnosis, she also offers that at audhdbri.com.

And our links:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"In the Bolivian jungle, Hannibal discovers he can lose 65,000 dollars in poker." Who is this Hannibal? Why did he not know he could lose money in poker? And where are these vehicular accidents coming from? Author Steven L. Kent joins us to figure out all the details!

You can find Steve's work on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Steven-L.-Kent/author/B001JSEHX8

And find us online:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/somebodywritethis

Facebook: https://facebook.com/somebodywritethis

Twitter: https://twitter.com/writethispod

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/writethispod/

"The story of Tom Light, from her early days as a ventriloquist to her later years as a monk." What leads someone from ventriloquism to a monastery? Is "Tom Light" her real name? And who is this Badgely who is going to rescue her? Thank you to our guest Rana McAnear for helping us work this all out!

"At a water park, a new vigilante assassin goes in search of some answers when his friend resurfaces." How does this friend resurface? What does the assassin need answers for? And which one of them has a death wish? Our guest Sarah Aho is here to help us work out what all this means!

"Two podcasters have three story prompts and no guest." That's not our synopsis, it's just what happens in this episode. For this very special holiday episode, it's just Hannah and Jennie, and they decide to get EXTRA ambitious with no guest and try to tie three very different plots together to create a Christmas-themed anthology. You'll have to give it a listen to find out if it works at all!

"The story of New Orleans District Attorney Elizabeth Branagh, who went from saving the day to exiling fairytale creatures."

What are fairytale creatures doing in New Orleans? How is a District Attorney involved? Is she one of the two droids? Our guest Nathan Chase is here to help figure it out! Nathan runs Hannah's favorite movie website, flickchart.com -- sign up for a free account to start ranking your favorite movies against each other!

"The story of King Scott, his impromptu ascension to the throne of a bankrupt school, and the grieving widower who helped him be murdered."

What kind of school has a king with a throne? Why does he want to be murdered? Is it the king or the widower falling under a passionate spell? Returning guest Randy Kirkpatrick is here to help us work it out! You can find him on Twitter at @r_w_kirkpatrick (for now, anyway!).

"A kidnapped Princess is set free and returns to the Montana Territory, where a mysterious American explores other universes." What kind of Princess comes from Montana? Who is the mysterious American? Are they both orphans? We're delighted our guest Gail Carson Levine was able to join us to work this all out!

Gail can be found online at gailcarsonlevine.com, and you can read her newest work, "Sparrows in the Wind," wherever you get your books.

"The story of Voldemort Keach, a zombie who struggles to come to grips with her past." Where on earth did that character name come from? What happened in the zombie's past? And what non-traditional money is in play? We need twice as many guests to make this work, so thank goodness for Amanda Nicholson and Andy N joining us and making this work!

You can find Amanda as Amanda Steel on Wordpress and Facebook, and Andy as Andy N on Facebook or @andynpoet on other social media. You can also check out their podcast Reading in Bed to hear more of them!

"Three orphan girls settle in a plane crash." Is the plane crashing through this whole story? What are these orphan girls doing there? Is one of them an ancient supernatural being? Fortunately we've got our guest Dan McPherson here to sort it all out with us. You can find him on Twitter and Instagram @leadersmustlead and check out his podcast Dreams Are Real to hear him delve into more storytelling!

"A manager of an orphanage and an aviation giant try to drink themselves to death, but it's not long before they reluctantly gather." Why are they so reluctant to gather? Are they drinking themselves to death separately before that? And how does the medical insurance come in? Thankfully we have our guest Sally Bays here to help us work it all out!

"The untold story of the last days of Quinn Oldman, a father disturbed by his own non-Victorian feelings." What kind of non-Victorian feelings are we talking about? Why was this story untold? And who or what or where is Dickinson? Our guest Jasper Fforde has the creativity and brainstorming power to help us work through it! Follow him online @jasperfforde.

"A rock group and a young Christmas loving dog take action." Okay, they take action to... what? Why would a dog love Christmas? And what is that title referring to? Our guest Jonathon Pernisek of the Musical Man podcast is here to help us work through it! Check out Jonathon and his work at @musicalmanpod on Twitter or wherever you listen to podcasts.

"In Monte Carlo, four assassins find themselves making an unthinkable sacrifice."

What kind of sacrifice are we talking about? Why are there so many assassins in one place? And is Alice Malkin one of them, or their target? Our guest, author Eliot Peper, is here to help us work it all out! Check out Eliot and his work at https://eliotpeper.com/

"A grieving widower wants to go to his honeymoon and be an assassin." ...What? How did his wife die? Who is going to assassinate? So glad we have returning guest Josh Garcia-Cotter here to figure out what's going on! You can follow him on Twitter @joshinthemosh89. 

"When corrupt police is haunted by visions of his dead wife, she sets out with a coma, her man suffering a family loss, and a dress shop lease to steal fifty cars." Well, that's... a mouthful. And a confusing one. Thankfully we have returning guest Katie Ahnberg to work it through with us! Follow her on Twitter @things_katiedid.

"Twin daughters and a cop from New York City search for a mining claim." Are the twin daughters the titular Kentucky girls? How do you search for a mining claim? And is this happening in Kentucky or New York City? Our guest Jasmine Warga is here to help sort this out! Check out her website, jasminewarga.com, and look for her newest book, A Rover's Story, released on October 4.

"A used car dealer moves in with the shady influential owner of a nightclub and his life changes dramatically." Why do these two move in together? What kind of dramatic changes ensue? And who is Ann Wolfe? Our guest Ian Trutt is here to help us work through these questions! You can follow along with his work at iantrutt.com.

"After a European loses $65,000 dollars in poker, an Englishman investigates a young woman's terrifying past."

Is the Englishman the same person as the European? What's in the young woman's terrifying past? And which of them is attending an intense, week-long counseling session? Our guest Naomi Laeuchli is here to help us walk through this confusion! You can check out her work on the Tales app for iOS and the Dorian app for iOS and Android.

"When a ruthless businessman arrives, she sets out with independence, her monster, and the French throne to put her life on hold."

Is this the literal French throne? How is a monster involved? And where does Philadelphia fit into all this? Fortunately our guest Jordan Conrad is here to work it all out with us! Follow Jordan on Instagram @jordan_illustrates.

"A secret police enforcer rebuilds her life after she doesn't mess up the job in a haunted castle."

How does NOT messing up the job destroy someone's life? Who is haunting this castle? And whose French fiance is involved in all this? Thankfully we have our guest, author Elizabeth Bear, to help us work through this nonsense!

You can follow Elizabeth on Twitter and Instagram @matociquala and on her website elizabethbear.com, where you can sign up for her newsletter and Patreon. Her new book "The Origin of Storms" comes out this summer, so check it out!

"In Camden Town, the most famous U.S. Olympic wrestling champion, looks out of her window."

Well, that's not a whole lot to go on. What happens next? Why is this woman in Camden Town? How does she encounter a psychopathic serial murderer? Author Megan Darragh is here to help us sort it out.

You can follow Megan on social media:
Twitter- @megandarragh3
Instagram- @megandarraghbooks
Facebook- Megan Darragh Books
YouTube- Megan's Musings