when you get to fifty something plus tax and you're sporting those ashtray locks of the sexy silver fox you may be better forgetting about the fifty shades of grey and putting your old sex pistols away.
A poem about leaving the steeltown Sheffield at the age of 19, I stood wondering why the train left at the minute past midnight until 100 steel whistles blew from the industrial Armageddon come apocalypse , at a minute past midnight the train guard blew his whistle and I never look back.
if ever you have a drink with a witch, make sure you leave that very night, because in the morning you may find yourself completely naked ,wet shaved with every single hair,an laid out on a gravestone with a little furry cat purring out your name.
A poem about friends who have now gone through divorce and are now back on the dating scene one who's 70 something plus tax and seems so keen to rekindle a teenage dream ,his pals kidding him on about how he should be on crumble or grumble instead of bumble,
I've done my best to reproduce his London cockney accent.
A poem about boy who was born into the last bastion of Beelzebub the basket of Marseille then who rose to rule France's under world for five decades before being gunned down dead in Paris for an old vendetta.
At one stage of our lives we were living like nocturnal Belfry bats fuelled by drink, coming in from nights out as the pinstripe blue businessman were heading off to work ,all of us especially the business men ended up having cranium crashes into the darkness of depression ,the best way to fight against this evil is with humour.
My seventh deadly sin sloth unlike the rest is void of any of the others ,using the epitome of laziness . the sloth creature turns out to be the perfect green dream machine, this hairy leaf eating mammal has a zero carbon footprint and could save the world on its own, we'd do well to put a little sinful slow sloth back in our own lives ,in order to save the planet.
Taking the tune from the first slow theme you have to improvise again in 15 minutes, still using 4ths and 5ths , braking the rules of harmony,forcing with just mood and emotion, anger ,15 mins of almost a musical tantrum . All rules should be broken so that in the third and final take maybe just maybe some unusual licks might be forced out .
A small piece I composed at the piano after listening to the bells of evensong accompanied by big Ben on the news . It must have been very boring playing music in just 4ths and 5ths taking the tones from their Bell's as the priests did, thank heavens for syncopation.
I was quite horrified to read that the human is responsible for the slaughter of three billion aninmals each day , i wrote the poem in a pompous manner after listening to a hunter talking about his hunting and blood sport s . They belive it tobe their righteous privalage
The little improvisation piece on the piano I wrote for Lilly who was 3 at the time and had lost a little bunny rabbit .
I made it jump around in thirds and feel as if her cloth bunny was jumping back, but he was later found in the washing machine.
forgive the recording as it's always bad from piano onto a mobile phone.
A tune I wrote for Lilly on my decrepit old piano , Lilly who then 5 years old was having a long tall Love Affair with her long tall Frigidaire sticking magnets and pictures all over it I thought we also should sing a song to it ,
the lyrics aren't too bad the tune is more complex than you think with tenths in the base and walking octaves In the alto .
Apologies for the recording again pianos and mobile phones don't record too well.
A poem I wrote about snails that started out as jellyfish swimming freely under the sea so I can now understand why bonded onto terrafirma they may suffer from depression or suicidal Tendencies throwing themselves under our feet on every garden path.
Twenty years ago It come as quite a shock when someone I'd known for ten years became bi especially when they were such a lady Killer and then become a man eater as well, but you quickly get use to it, amazingly his sexual score card went through the roof and mine went to scratch zero, I thought I was going to hav't join him as I went into total sexual cessation. , by all accounts we now have 70 shades of sexuality so we all better get along and get used to it .
A short piece of piano music I wrote about the Innocence of a young child's mind and how our hallowed docterines must sound to them almost as serious nursery rhymes, hence why I've thrown in a few holy hollow fourth's Church intervals . Your humble musical servant apologizes for the recording yet again as I am unfortunately playing it live in to my mobile phone.
A poem I wrote after reading that ,In The Great War, most soldiers between 16 and 18 years of age ,of which there were millions mostly virgins,
Lord kitchener Secretary of State for war had written into their guide books .
"In this new experience you may find Temptations in wine and women you must resist both” meaning avoid drink and brothel's ,with 6000 dying per day some having a life expectancy of 17 hours, I would imagine catching the pox was the least of their worries.
A sketch I wrote for a friend who's an airport manager and has to make the decision on which emotional pets ranging from possums to pigs ride in cargo or first class , I wrote a strange take on trying to buy yourself an emotional pet over the telephone.
A short poem I wrote after hearing that Ai's
are playing other Ai's in computer games to produce what's teamed as AGi's, the poem is in 5 7 5 seventeen syllable Haiku style repeat, which AGi's may prefer.
How in medieval times quacks were dressed to resemble large birds for protection wearing huge beak's
They believed the soul was brought and taken by them in transmigration i.e stalk''s , babies , raven s ,were omens
A poem I wrote for a woman who lost the love of her life , then had to marry someone who couldn't replace the first love and so she placed all her emotions into money and hate so ending in vitriol bitterness.
Love seems such an old piece of clothing , threadbare, out of style.
Untill you try it on then you find it's still very much in fashion.
one I wrote about the different aspects of finding a love to fit.
Warts and all
paint me seid Cromwell ,who had the skin of an old toad . After his death they had his body exhumed and hung then decapitated ,with his head placed onto a pole out side Westminster parliament.
Trapped in a traffic jam on the M62 ,Monday morning 7.45
Remember that old saying,
Why do they call it the rush hour when nothing moves ?, except a quick melody of music, that I made up on the spot with a diesel truck accompaniment.
A poem I wrote for two old Bohemians who have through iresponsible behaviour in younger years destroyed that fragile entity love and now are left with the ghost of it still in their hearts which they have tried and resurrect.
Poem I wrote for a beautiful girl who I will love till I die..
It was such a shame that we were both iresponsible when we were given a chance at holding that ever so fragile flame that near mortals call love , also both of us were side ways from sobriety and far south of sanity .
A poem I wrote for my model T father who was made in 1926 ,his first day at work in 1939 was walking through Steel yards in Sheffield where shire horses and elephants were used as machinery pulling Steel drays in the lead up to the 2nd world War a terrifying experience at the age of thirteen.