The Long Take

In addition to being a thought-provoking movie about how close we are to disintegrating as a society, Alex Garland’s Civil War is a rollicking cinematic experience.

We discuss the film’s affection for journalism, the intricate character work that Garland is able to accomplish via action sequences, and the film’s stand-out moments.

One of them involves a scene-stealing cameo by Jesse Plemons, and the other is an extended climactic action sequence that works viscerally and emotionally.

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Is Amar Singh Chamkila a long-awaited return to form for director Imtiaz Ali, or is it another let-down from the once-promising filmmaker?

We discuss the film’s inventive approach to the music biopic genre, if not narratively then at least formally. We also talk about Diljit Dosanjh and Parineeti Chopra’s central performances as the slain husband-wife folk singer duo and address the ‘Hindi gaze’ that Ali brings to this inherently Punjabi tale.

Along the way, we also discuss the nature of high and low art and the film’s many defences of Chamkila’s controversial music.

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Aattam, the latest Malayalam-language gem that further solidifies the industry’s artistic stronghold on the cinema landscape of the country, offers an inventive spin on the whodunnit genre.

We discuss the film’s gripping narrative, ambitious social commentary, and director Anand Ekarshi’s bold voice.

We also talk about the many moral quandaries that the movie puts its characters in, and how willingly it invites audiences to gaze inward and participate in the proceedings.

Is Fighter another in the long and increasingly problematic line of hyper-nationalistic Indian action movies, or is its biggest problem that it can’t look beyond star Hrithik Roshan?

Murder Mubarak lowers the bar even further for Netflix India, and feels like a particularly annoying missed opportunity.

We talk about the inept filmmaking, the strange structure, and the over-the-top performances of its ensemble cast.

We also wonder how the finished film can look like something that was snatched away from director Homi Adajania and handed over to editors who’ve never met him.

And for the second time in two weeks, we find ourselves noting missing scenes from a big-budget movie featuring major Bollywood names.

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Merry Christmas, director Sriram Raghavan’s follow-up to the critical and commercial hit Andhadhun, is nothing to celebrate.

We discuss the film’s lack of discernible aesthetic, the complete absence of any spark between stars Katrina Kaif and Vijay Sethupathi, and its baffling climax.

Along the way, we discuss the decision to reduce an important child character to a plot device, and the increasingly illogical behaviour displayed by both central characters.

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Dune: Part Two is being called one of the greatest sequels ever made. It isn’t.

All India Rank, the feature directorial debut of Varun Grover, is a refreshing change of pace for Bollywood, but still not as good as it could have been.

Joram, the fourth feature film from director Devashish Makhija, juggles multiple tones and narratives. But is it successful at it?

We discuss Manoj Bajpayee’s mostly silent central performance as a displaced tribal man running for his life, and the film’s heavy handed socio-political commentary.

We also wonder if the movie would’ve worked better as a tight 90-minute thriller, and point out a worryingly regressive trend in Makhija’s films.

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Animal, starring Ranbir Kapoor, is hardly as offensive as director Sandeep Reddy Vanga probably intended it to be, but it’s aggravating on many levels nonetheless.

We discuss the film’s infantile approach to its themes and Vanga’s dedication to being edgy at the expense of storytelling and character development.

We also talk about the film’s unbearable length, inconsequential subplots, and the odd decision to not introduce Bobby Deol’s villain sooner.

Along the way, we also talk about the numerous petulant attacks that Vanga has made on critics and how his neediness is reflected in the film.

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Is Salaar the worst movie we’ve covered on the podcast? It might be.

We discuss the incomprehensible plotting, Prashanth Neel’s overwhelming direction, and debate about the film’s three major action set-pieces.

Shockingly, Tiger 3—the fifth overall instalment in the YRF Spy Universe—isn’t entirely unwatchable.

But the movie could’ve been so much better with just about any other star in the lead role instead of Salman Khan, who not only struggles to emote but also seems pained to move physically.

Is 12th Fail actually one of the best Hindi movies of 2023 or is it massively overrated?

We find ourselves wondering why writer-director Vidhu Vinod Chopra’s latest film is getting rave reviews, because all we could see was a deeply problematic, all too simplistic story about a young man let down by society.

We also talk about Vikrant Massey’s performance, and the egregious brown-face makeup that he’s been coated with.

Along the way, we discuss the film’s flawed perspective and disinterest in examining the more complex aspects of what is an undoubtedly stirring true story.

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Kho Gaye Hum Kahan, the new film from the team behind The Archies, is a rare Bollywood movie about millennial malaise.

But like its characters, it’s too distracted by social media and the desire to say something about our addiction to it.

We talk about the performances of its three leads—Siddhant Chaturvedi, Ananya Panday and Adarsh Gourav—and discuss the many ways in which it honours and undermines their experiences.

We also admire the effort that writer-director Arjun Varain Singh has gone through to ground the movie in a recognisable reality, as opposed to most Hindi movies of its kind.

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Rebel Moon is the worst film of Zack Snyder’s career, and that’s saying something.

We talk about the director’s uninspired homage to the works of Akira Kurosawa and George Lucas, his unusually bland visuals, and the film’s wooden writing.

We also wonder why the project looks so cheap, seeing as it comes from a streamer that is often willing to invest $200 million on less-deserving movies, and why Snyder has cast seemingly his second and third choices for most roles.

We also discuss Netflix’s cynical approach to fashioning a franchise, and reverse-engineering a director’s cut movement, all at the cost of producing a cohesive cinematic experience.

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Sofia Coppola’s Priscilla is the antithesis of Baz Luhrmann’s terrible Elvis movie.

We discuss Coppola’s sad-core storytelling, her determination never to leave Priscilla’s side, and her absolutely damning portrayal of the King of Rock and Roll.

We also talk about Cailee Spaeny’s central performance as Priscilla, Jacob Elordi’s menacing turn as Elvis, and the movie’s delicate handling of their very complex relationship.

But we also wonder if Coppola’s emotionally distant direction might have made the stirring true-life story a little unaffecting.

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In The Archies, writer-director Zoya Akhtar disguises her politics behind teen romance.

But does this diffuse the impact of what she’s trying to say? We talk about the film’s coming-of-age themes, how each character is given definitive traits, and whether it’s successful in capturing teen angst.

We also discuss the cast of newcomers, and wonder if the movie will be offensive to certain sections of the audience.

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Kaathal – The Core, directed by Jeo Baby, is shaping up to be a real word-of-mouth hit, purely on the strength of its sheer quality.

We speak about the many reasons why the new Malayalam-language drama left us so moved, and highlight the two central performances by Mammootty and Jyotika.

We appreciate director Baby’s command over visual storytelling, and how effectively he uses silences to convey volumes about his characters.

We also discuss the delicate tonal balance that the film strikes, making sure to not paint anybody as the “villain”.

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Leo, the new Tamil-language blockbuster starring “Thalapathy” Vijay, is now on Netflix.

We discuss the film’s abysmal storytelling, the charmless central performance, and poorly designed action sequences. We also talk about the larger Lokesh Cinematic Universe and how shoehorned-in the references to the franchise feel.

Along the way, we attempt to dissect the Inception-level flashback sequence and discuss the strange decision to cast Sanjay Dutt as the villain, only to dub over his original voice and reduce his character to a motiveless henchman.

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Watching The Railway Men is like taking an express train back to Netflix India circa 2019 when the bottom of the barrel would be scraped week after week.

Almost unwatchable at even four episodes long, the new YRF-produced series is so inept that it makes you lose faith in the art of storytelling as a whole.

We discuss the show’s bizarre approach to a real-life tragedy, its wafer-thin characters, countless contrivances, and unintentionally hilarious plot devices.

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Is The Killer one of David Fincher’s most inconsequential movies?

We discuss the film’s subversive approach to the conventions of assassin cinema, Fincher’s clinical treatment of the subject matter, and the odd bursts of humour that he peppers through the two-hour narrative.

We also talk about Michael Fassbender’s statue-esque performance, and spend a considerable amount of time trying to decipher the meaning behind the meaninglessness.

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Is Killers of the Flower Moon a culmination of what director Martin Scorsese has been trying to achieve his entire career, or is it an overlong, overindulgent slog that general audiences will turn their backs on?

We discuss the film’s simmering tone, the epic tragedy at its core, and the performances of its central cast, which includes Leonardo DiCaprio, Robert De Niro and Lily Gladstone.

We also talk about the film’s memorable ending, which recontextualises not only everything that has come before, but also Scorsese’s own career.

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OMG 2, starring Pankaj Tripathi as a saintly middle-aged man, is a bizarre concoction of ideas that ultimately comes across as a lazy attempt to pander to the Hindu majority.

We discuss the film’s odd approach to a straightforward story, its stretched, preachy narrative, and the fact that the decision to package it as a religious drama feels like an afterthought.

We also talk about Akshay Kumar’s glorified cameo, which feels completely shoehorned into the story, and the film’s tentative approach to the very real themes that it occasionally touches on.

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Khufiya, the new spy movie on Netflix, might just be one of the worst things that Vishal Bhardwaj has ever done.

We discuss the film’s tonal inconsistencies, incoherent plotting, odd performances, and most of all, that wild second-half.

We also talk about the background score and how completely out of step with its story; the strange decision to include full musical interludes and introduce entire subplots that lead nowhere.

We also delve into how secondary Tabu feels to the film, which replaces her character as the protagonist halfway through with Wamiqa Gabbi.

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Released as four separate shorts, Wes Anderson’s Roald Dahl adaptations for Netflix are some of the best films that he has ever made.

We discuss his minimalist approach to each story, the offbeat narration and stagey production, and also the deeper themes he wants to tackle. Anderson also flips through genres and tones, but presents each movie in his own unique style.

While The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar is by far the most uplifting of the bunch, the rest—Poison, The Swan, and The Rat Catcher—are a more cynical experience. Together, these films are a deeply personal expression, and a great entry point into his filmography.

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Jaane Jaan, director Sujoy Ghosh’s Hindi-language adaptation of the Japanese bestseller The Devotion of Suspect X, is a competently made thriller with a hint of playfulness.

We discuss the trio of central performances by Kareena Kapoor Khan, Jaideep Ahlawat and Vijay Varma, and talk about the change in perspective that Ghosh has introduced in his adaptation.

We also dissect the other changes the movie makes to the source novel, most notably the ending, which is toned down substantially.

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Rocky Aur Rani Kii Prem Kahaani plays like director Karan Johar’s apology for his own past filmmaking, and for the many missteps that Bollywood has made over the years when it comes to gender politics.

We appreciate the film’s progressive ideas, its frank depiction of desire, and how willing it is to embrace its camp nature. But we also point out the moments where it goes overboard.

We discuss Johar’s efforts to do better, and highlight a scene that represents how drastically his thinking has changed.

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Friday Night Plan—the new Netflix movie starring Babil Khan—is the kind of film you forget the moment you turn off the TV.

We discuss its eagerness to borrow from classic teen comedies, but complete inability to offer heart or pathos.

We also talk about its odd perspective on teenage life, which seems like it is based more on films than actual experiences.

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Satyaprem Ki Katha, the new Kartik Aaryan and Kiara Advani movie, left us incensed.

We discuss the many ways in which the movie is actively anti-feminist; its horrific treatment of Advani’s character, the obvious perspective problem, and its casual disregard for very real, and very delicate themes.

We also talk about its triggering tone, the film’s last-minute rug-pull, and the potentially dangerous ideas that it propagates about retribution.

But we lose all hope when we consider the mostly positive reactions that the film received upon its theatrical release.

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The Long Take is doing its first ever retrospective episode! Jaane Bhi Do Yaaro turns 40 this week, and we rewatched the cult classic and discovered that it still holds up.

We discuss our favourite scenes, the simmering anger under the film’s goofy surface, and appreciate the skill required to play a dead body on screen.

We also talk about how difficult it is for a film to rewire the audience’s brains, how impossible Naseeruddin Shah found this on set, and why it’s a good thing that a planned sequel was never made.

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Greta Gerwig’s Barbie divided us like no movie ever has on this podcast.

Is it a sharp satire of patriarchy, or is it simply making the most obvious points about how unfair the world is for half the population?

Is it an imaginative skewering of consumerism, or is a particularly annoying attempt at covert marketing?

Is it another win for Gerwig, or a shockingly tone-deaf misstep? We discuss all this and more in our latest episode.

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Oppenheimer is Christopher Nolan’s most political movie yet, and in many ways, among his most sobering.

We discuss the film’s dialogue-heavy storytelling, the epic Trinity test sequence, the moral dilemma at its core, and Nolan’s deliberate artistic deviations from his past work.

We also talk about the hourlong final act, which turns Oppenheimer into a wholly different experience, and make a feeble attempt to rank where the movie stands in Nolan’s filmography.

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Kohrra, the new Netflix crime drama series co-created by Paatal Lok’s Sudip Sharma, is a grim experience that takes a character-first approach to its complex storytelling.

We discuss the performances of Suvinder Vicky and Barun Sobti, the rich and textured world that the show is able to create, and the social commentary about Punjab that it offers in an unusually subtle way.

We also talk about Sharma’s evolution from the Udta Punjab days, and our shared admiration for some of the show’s best scenes.

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Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny, the fifth film in the long-running franchise, is a bloated, overlong and ultimately empty experience.

We discuss the film’s action-first plotting, abundance of cameos and references, and unsatisfying attempt at giving Harrison Ford an emotional send-off.

We also talk about that ambitious ending, and unpack the film’s tendency to repeatedly undermine its most heartfelt moments with Marvel-like humour.

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Sudhir Mishra’s Afwaah—now out on Netflix after a negligible theatrical run—feels like watching someone engage in a primetime TV “news debate” with themselves.

We discuss Nawazuddin Siddiqui’s miscasting, Mishra’s convoluted approach to several important themes and ideas, and the movie’s complete failure as a genre exercise.

Tiku Weds Sheru, the new rom-com/crime drama starring Nawazuddin Siddiqui and Avneet Kaur, sent us into an existential spiral.

We wonder how Kangana Ranaut could make her film production debut with something as pedestrian as this, and come up with conspiracy theories for how Siddiqui and Prime Video would agree to associate themselves with this movie.

We also talk about its jarring tonal shifts, its complete inauthenticity, and its refusal to be sincere about what it wants to be.

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Extraction 2, the sequel to Netflix’s hit pandemic-era action movie Extraction, resurrects Chris Hemsworth’s black ops mercenary Tyler Rake for some more high-stakes action.

We discuss the film’s by-the-numbers plot, but also praise its central extraction sequence, edited to appear as one 21-minute sequence.

We also talk about the Russo brothers’ franchise-minded approach to everything they touch, and analyse why that’s a bad idea for this series.

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Bloody Daddy, the new action thriller film directed by Ali Abbas Zafar and starring Shahid Kapoor, marks a new low for them both. It’s streaming for free on JioCinema, but audiences should demand money for surviving it.

We discuss the film’s laughable John Wick and Jason Bourne ambitions, given Zafar and Kapoor’s sheer disinterest in doing the actual hard work to achieve good results.

The action is choppily edited, the storytelling is confusing, and the background score is an assault on the senses. For a wall-to-wall action movie, you never actually get the sense that the main character is the one doing the fighting, but at least Ronit Roy and Sanjay Kapoor understood the assignment.

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Director Anubhav Sinha’s Bheed—out now on Netflix in a badly mangled form—attempts to condense India’s pandemic experience into one location and a handful of characters.

We discuss the filmmaker’s tendency to use his characters as a mouthpiece, his decision to present this movie in black and white, and his use of symbolism to capture the pandemic experience.

We also list down the troubling cuts imposed upon the film by the CBFC, and what precedent this sets for the future.

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Vikram Vedha, the Hindi-language remake of directors Pushkar and Gayatri’s Tamil-language original, pretends to be smarter than it actually is.

And what it is is a loud, nonsensical actioner that has more in common with the KGF films than Heat.

While Hrithik Roshan is having fun as the antihero Vedha, Saif Ali Khan is too bland as his foil, the murderous cop Vikram.

We discuss the film’s complicated storytelling, the jarring tonal shifts, and complete lack of tension.

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Ben Affleck’s Air—out now on Prime Video—is an old-fashioned Hollywood drama featuring charismatic performances and propelled by a smart script.

We discuss how the film avoids coming across as an ode to corporate America, and how it uses the grammar of sports dramas to tell an enjoyable and earnest underdog story.

We highlight the film’s best scenes, and wonder if its success could translate to an uptick in shoe sales for Nike.

We also chat about Matt Damon’s central performance, and the film’s decision to keep Michael Jordan literally in the shadows.

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Ranbir Kapoor and Shraddha Kapoor play semi-humans in director Luv Ranjan’s baffling new film, Tu Jhoothi Main Makkaar, now out on Netflix.

We discuss the unbelievable plotting, contrived character motivations, and truly terrible visual aesthetic. How could something that reportedly cost ₹200 crore look this cheap?

We also talk about the casual misogyny of the story, its reinforcing of traditional dynamics, and the film’s reliance on dramatic moments over relatable human behaviour.

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Two charming movie stars, a director with a unique voice, and as many as four high-profile writers couldn’t salvage the new Apple TV+ action rom-com Ghosted, starring Chris Evans and Ana de Armas.

We discuss the film’s anonymous aesthetic, the nonsensical plot, and the worrying influence of the Russo brothers on big-budget streaming cinema.

We also unpack Ghosted’s pointless cameos, CGI environments, and wonder if Apple is headed down the same path as Netflix.

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Vikramaditya Motwane’s period drama series Jubilee—now streaming in full on Prime Video—is meant to be a loving homage to the Golden Age of Hindi cinema, but it often comes across as emotionally distant.

We delve into the show’s fascination for backroom drama, personal betrayal, and behind-the-scenes politics.

We also talk about the several pivotal moments that take place off-screen, and wonder whether the quality of visual effects and set design is satisfactory for a show of this scale.

Later, we discuss the possibilities of future seasons, and whether any of these characters have a chance of returning.

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Director Hansal Mehta’s Faraaz takes a real-life incident that happened in Bangladesh and uses it to make a political statement about India.

We discuss the film’s reliance on the “good Muslim trope”, and the odd choice to limit the internal debate to religion.

We also talk about the film’s tonal irregularities, its archetypal characters, and wonder who the target audience for something like this is.

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