Thomas Kingwell

Thomas Kingwell

By Thomas
Welcome to The Dad Syndicate!

THE DAD SYNDICATE is focused on banding together with a group of men committed to owning their roles as fathers in raising sons and daughters of courage, integrity and principal.
We believe The Dad Syndicate will equip fathers with all the tools, skills and knowledge required to live the best they can.
All the time, energy and hard work it takes to be the man that your family needs and deserve is always going to be worth it. So take what is relevant to your life and resonates with you and put it into ACTION!
More places to listen
Welcome to The Dad Syndicate!

THE DAD SYNDICATE is focused on banding together with a group of men committed to owning their roles as fathers in raising sons and daughters of courage, integrity and principal.
We believe The Dad Syndicate will equip fathers with all the tools, skills and knowledge required to live the best they can.
All the time, energy and hard work it takes to be the man that your family needs and deserve is always going to be worth it. So take what is relevant to your life and resonates with you and put it into ACTION!

More places to listen

EP.25 - Be who you were born to be with AYDIAN DOWLING
Aydian is a husband and father and he loves his family fiercely. He works hard and he works out hard, at times sizing himself up against the other guys lifting at the gym. He loves life and lives it to the fullest. He takes extreme ownership in the situations he finds himself in. He believes in himself and the call he has answered. He is like any one of the outstanding men we follow and emulate. Except for one difference. One. He is a transgender man. Aydian is celebrating 10 years since he started hormone therapy and the incredible journey it set him on. Today he shares his story, wisdom and passion with me. I lived blinded by prejudice and lacked empathy and perspective for so long, but I am glad I had my eyes opened so that I could share this conversation with him , and now with you.
November 12, 2019
EP.22 - Walk the Talk: Words backed by action
This episode is about leading by doing as well as saying, and making both of the highest calibre. Simple.
November 11, 2019
The Dad Stoic EP.4 - 7 principals to master the Arena of the Mind
Our mind is like a battlefield sometimes. With so many things vying for our attention and the business of everyday life it is easy to lose sight of what is important to us and allow our minds to become clouded and ineffective at dealing with the challenges fatherhood throws at us. Stoicism provides us with principles and practices that help us to regain perspective, clarity and develop the tranquility needed to parent in an effective way and be the present fathers and husbands that our family needs. In this episode I discuss 7 principles and strategies for calming our minds and for moving closer to living a life of meaning, value  and virtue.
November 8, 2019
Episode.24 - Heritage, Music, Country and Family with Pierre Greeff
Every man needs a good soundtrack to accompany him through life, especially when he becomes a dad. Songs to go surfing to, songs to get amped for the rugby, songs to fall in love to, songs to keep you sane and for me, songs that connect you to home. For me, no band has been more present in my playlist over the last 10 years than DIE HEUWELS FANTASTIES. In this episode, I am honoured and excited to be joined by lead singer Pierre Greeff in a conversation that spans many subjects, mostly connected to our shared love for our country and the ways we can step up as dads in taking responsibility for our family’s health, wealth and safety! Dankie Pierre, ek het dit baie geniet! 
November 5, 2019
Episode. 23 - Becoming a Warrior Dad with Jim Burdumy
Today on the podcast I have the pleasure of talking with Warrior Dad Podcast host and founder Jim Burdumy. Jim is a father to a 7-year-old son and has been married for a decade. It is his mission to share his knowledge and wisdom especially concerning health and fitness with other fathers so that they too can step up and be the effective dads that their family deserves.
October 30, 2019
Dad Stoic EP.3 - 7 Stoic Principals and Physical Health
This episode takes you through the ways that 7 stoic practices help us to step up in the arena of the physical health in a way that is most effective and serves our objective of being the husbands and fathers that our families need and deserve and do it for as long as possible. 
October 23, 2019
The Dad Stoic EP.2 - The Dad Stoic and the 7 Arenas of a man's life
In this episode, I introduce "The way of the Dad Stoic in the 7 arenas" series. Every week I will be delving into and discussing how becoming more stoic in the approach we take to showing up in each of the 7 arenas helps us become more effective fathers, more loving husbands and stronger and more honorable men. I have recently embarked on this journey of implementing more of the timeless truths and practises of the stoics into my life and am already seeing a marked difference in areas such as taking offence, being reactionary instead of responsive. This is, in turn, having a noticeable positive impact on my relationship with my wife and my connection with my children. And it is just the beginning. I am feeling more calm, confident and at ease within myself, and I am looking forward to more growth and progress and really living the good life. I hope you join me as I  explore and implement stoic practises in each arena of my life and that you too can reap the rewards!
October 14, 2019
EP.21 - Great men, Great fathers, Good life with Brian Grogan
Winston Churchill, Theodore Roosevelt, Nelson Mandela, John F Kennedy. All of these men made their mark on history and stood out as some of the greatest men to ever live. But how did their children see them? Were they given the same attention as the call each man answered? Did their sons and daughters feel that their fathers cared for them in the same way as they burned to make a difference in the world and gain significance amongst men? Today repeat guest former Navy SEAL and self proclaimed ranch hand Brian Grogan discuss how fathers often choose a path that leads to power, status, financial gain or provides with the opportunity to serve their country through their bravery and courage on the battlefield, and how many times this comes at the expense of performing our duty, honoring our wife and children and the rewards of putting our families first.
October 10, 2019
The Dad Stoic EP. 1 - In...Dependence
This is the first instalment of our Saturday morning kickstart to the weekend for Dads. Nice short bite size topics to digest on the wayt to pick up rolls and croissants, on an early morning run or whatever you have going on a Saturday morning. The weekend is the perfect time to check our priorities, decide to be intentional and present in our families and set us up for the coming week. This week Tom talks about unhealthy dependencies and how these prevent us from being the men and fathers we are capable of.
October 4, 2019
EP.20-Tom's two cents, and Bert's Pyramid for Brute Health
Dads, this is an episode you don't want to miss. Bert puts a completely different spin on the food pyramid. Tom gives us some solid insight into how the unhealthy dependencies we have developed through childhood and into manhood can have a negative impact on the way we show up in the areas we claim are most important. This episode also signals The Dad Syndicate kicking off 2 new short and info-packed podcast episodes a week. Bert's Brute Health will provide you with everything, and we mean everything you need as a dad to step up in the physical health arena so that you can live a long happy life and enjoy the best physical conditioning possible without sacrificing all the things that make living worthwhile and setting you up for failure by encouraging you to find quick fixes you can't maintain. Consistency is key to Brute Health, and that's what Bert will be giving you in 10 to 15 minutes each week. Also, look out for Tom's Two Cents every Saturday morning to set us up to own our roles as dads on the weekend, and get us in the best mindset possible to make our way intentionally through each weekend as present fathers.
October 2, 2019
EP.19 - A road map for fatherhood, Raising Girls and the Happiness Hype
With so much information on how to parent effectively flooding in from all over the place, it's hard to know if we are coming or going as fathers sometimes. The latest study says this, the next says that and Duncan down the road also feels compelled to share his pearls of wisdom with anyone who will listen! So what should we do? Who's right and what's wrong? In this episode, we talk about having a tried and tested road map to parenting that doesn't change with every new finding but is founded on core values and beliefs. We also talk about the pursuit of happiness and how this ultimately leads to dissatisfaction and chasing after things we don't really want or need. My guest today is a pastor and is a father to four daughters and shares his thoughts on how he is raising them to be caring, courageous and loving people who show grace to others and stand up for what is right. 
September 25, 2019
EP.18 - How clear priorities lead to present parenting
We all talk about priorities. Yet it seems we are often just paying them lip service. Do you really know what is most important to you? And even if you are certain, do your actions speak louder than your words? In this episode we discuss being very clear on what our priorities are and the way that being laser focused on what is most significant and brings the most meaning to our lives can help us to be more present and calm parents. I thoroughly enjoyed this episode and think you will too!
September 19, 2019
EP.17 - It takes a RESOLUTE MAN to raise 8 kids
This episode I have the great pleasure of talking Isaac Tolpin. He is a man of many talents, none less impressive than his ability to raise 8 children. But it takes more than talent to teach, mentor and lead such a big family. It takes commitment, intentionality, sacrifice and many more characteristics to succeed in our life’s most important mission. Isaac talks us through the importance of being present during our children’s younger years, and dispels the myth that if we need to hustle to get to the top that this is the time to do it. We discuss the likelihood that we aren’t really giving our best even though we claim to be doing this and how prioritising effectively can help us achieve our dreams both in our careers and as fathers. Isaac also touches on what it like raising teenage children (he has 4!) and what we as fathers need to do before they reach this stage in order to make these years a blessing and not a curse, as well as the role that his belief in God has helped him become the father and husband he is today.  It is a fascinating and entertaining conversation that helps us realise that a positive mindset about raising kids, whether it be 8 or just 1, allows us to see parenting as the incredible privilege it is and not the burden many people tend to label it as. I trust you enjoy it. Let us know what you think by leaving a rating or review! Thanks!
September 11, 2019
EP.16 - DIVORCED DADS PLAYBOOK:Let's go 50/'s why.
Let's get one thing straight - Children need their mother AND their father. In this episode I provide you with the many reasons that children should be in a share parenting model after divorce wherever possible. These motivations for 50/50 parenting come directly from the list I compiled while fighting for equal time with and for my kids. It took 5 years to achieve that goal! I hope you can experience that too and that your children grow up spending as much time as possible with their dad. This is quite a hard hitting episode in several places, BUT we can't hold  back when it comes to this issue. Children need fathers. Let's make 50/50 parenting the standard.
September 4, 2019
EP.8 - The Divorced Dad’s Gameplan
There is perhaps no greater challenge for a father than finding himself divorced, no longer living with the kids and at the mercy of their mother and the family courts, who often award custody to the mother, while the father is relegated to "Weekend Dad" and must pay for it in more ways than just child support. It can be as devastating an experience as is possible, leading to severe consequences in father's lives and the lives of their children. Being a successful divorced dad, who maintains a positive relationship with the children despite being divorced from their mother, with whom the relationship is often very strange and often toxic, is an extra burden for dads to bear.  While each divorce situation is unique, the more a dad knows about what to expect, the better he can react. And the better they react the greater the chance of them achieving their goal of seeing their children more and being able to fulfill their roles as fathers. Dads who manage the situation effectively share some common threads in their approach and attitude. What can you do to have a greater probability of success in this situation?
August 31, 2019
EP.15 - Choose to Commit. Enrich your life.
In this episode Bert and Tom discuss the commitment we made when we became fathers and attempt to answers some of the questions related to maintaining and developing this trait in a world full of distraction and obligation. Why do some fathers find it so hard to step up and commit to their roles as fathers? How did we get so "busy" that we neglect this role? Why are we so easily distracted by the commitments we have to clearly less important things? Is there such a thing as being too committed to parenting? How do we find the sweet spot between losing ourselves in parenting and not being involved enough? And how can we change the stereotypes that have surrounded fathers and bring more awareness to the immense significance a father plays in his children's lives? What is clear is that choosing to commit can add value to our lives but commitment to things that distract us from our greatest calling in life can rob us and our children of the wonder that being a tight knit family can bring.
August 28, 2019
EP.14 - How dads add to education
In this episode, we discuss the partnership, or lack thereof between parents and teachers in ensuring that our children get the most out of their time at school. Far too many dads are leaving the education of their children to teachers and moms and not placing the necessary significance on their role as primary educators and the the vital part they can play in helping their kids thrive at school. At the same time they have unrealistic expectations of teachers, who as a result of father's lack of involvement, have to pick up the pieces and perform many other functions apart from facilitating the acqusition of knowledge and development of schools. If these words make you feel uncomfortable, good! Time to step up and take responsibility for how your child shows up at school and stop leaving it to overworked, underpaid and underappreciated educators!
August 21, 2019
EP.13 - A Navy SEAL's lessons on fatherhood, marriage and being a man.
Brian Grogan was a navy Seal for 23 years. On the podcast he shares his journey to becoming part of an elite group of soldiers and how this trained him to face uncertainty with courage, calm and intentionality. One would think that getting through BUDS and rubbing shoulders with some of the toughest men alive would prepare you for marriage and fatherhood and that you would deal with everyday challenges with grace and aplomb. Right? WRONG...Until now... Brian is open and honest about the mistakes he has made, the weaknesses he recognized and how he eventually translated the lessons he learned as a NAVY SEAL to being a good husband and father. Like all of us he has not got it all together. But he is determined to earn his trident every day for his wife, his children, those around him and for himself. 
August 14, 2019
EP.12 - Raising children on your own, autism & the school system and work life balance.
"You get one round to raise children and win at life. Commit!" Alan Placer is from New Jersey, USA, where he runs the company he founded and developed while raising his 10-year-old son on his own after his divorce. Alan puts great value on being committed to stepping up in all the arenas of your life as a man and a father. His son, now 20, has high functioning autism which presented its own challenges, especially when it came to helping to navigate his child through a school system that was ill-prepared to support children with different learning barriers and social struggles effectively. Alan made a decision to apply himself to become the best father he could be and to focus on the positive things in life, all while building a seven figure business. He also believes that as fathers we set the example for our children by helping those around us and being ready to serve in whatever capacity required. Alan is able to give an excellent post mortem on his success as a parent - his son left the house at 18 and already has a successful career at 20 inspite of the multiple hurdles along the way. It was a real pleasure to have Alan on the podcast and this show is well worth the listen!
August 7, 2019
In this episode we introduce you the Dad Syndicate and tell you a bit more about who we are. We talk about the 7 Arenas of life a father should work on and we have a discussion on what it means to be a real man-making soap, watching The Notebook and singing...
July 31, 2019
EP.10 - From Slob to Stoic Spartan
Before we become fathers, we have a far greater amount of time at our disposal to work on ourselves and step up as a man first before carrying the responsibility of raising kids successfully. In order to raise happy kids, we need to know who we are and be satisfied with who we are and the life we have created. Today my guest talks about just that. John Davies is a university language professor who works in South Korea and he leads us through the process by which he is developing himself into the man he wants to be and his family need and deserve. His journey is one that every man must take at some stage of his life in order to live the best he can. He talks about turning from a life of aimless drifting to one of intentional and setting clear objectives. We also discuss working on our relationships with our significant others, specifically when our partner is from another culture, so that our relationships form the backbone for parenting and facing the stresses that come along with that. John tells us about his desire to pass on his core values to his children and how accepting others as they are and not placing expectations on them leads to greater happiness. Finally John points out that the time we spend trying to change others would be better invested in working on ourselves. He is a stoic warrior and his message is pertinent to fathers and future fathers alike.
July 24, 2019
EP.6 - How to avoid raising Nightmare Kids
Are you raising entitled and indulged chidren? Is your kid always throwing a raging fit until they get what they want? Are they running your life? Have you ever stopped and asked yourself, “am I raising a child that contributes positively to our family or turns the dream we have into a nightmare?”⁠ ⁠ You want to give yourself the best odds of producing a human being who is not a disaster and also make it through the first 18 years of his or her life without going bonkers.⁠ ⁠ These days, with all the other input you have no control over, not raising these kind of kids requires intentionality and hard work. So if you aren't interested in some blood, sweat and tears, then this podcast might not be for you. ⁠ Here are our 7 recommendations on how not to raise nightmare kids:
July 18, 2019
EP 9 - My Own Harshest Critic!
 We are indeed our own harshest critic! Sometimes you have to treat yourself as you'd treat your best friend.  By being kind, telling them words of wisdom and that things will work out because they will and you need to believe that yourself.  The biggest downfall of being hard on yourself is the voices between your ears, your worst enemy, which is yourself. 
July 10, 2019
EP 7: Crafting Your Vision
 Creating a vision for your life might seem like a frivolous, fantastical waste of time, but it’s not: creating a compelling vision of the life you want is actually one of the most effective strategies for achieving the life of your dreams. Perhaps the best way to look at the concept of a life vision is as a compass to help guide you to take the best actions and make the right choices that help propel you toward your best life. 
June 24, 2019
EP.5 - Renovate your mindset with Joshua Laycock
In this episode Tom interviews Joshua Laycock on the importance of your mindset and how to renovate your mindset to be a better man, partner and father. 
June 18, 2019
EP 04: Mental health, meditation and morning routines.
A conversation about the importance of mental health, how meditation makes us better men and why you need a morning routine.
June 10, 2019
EP 03: Run slowly, lift heavy and family chaos
Part two of three in our health and fitness part. This episode we talk about lifting heavy stuff, cardio and it's role. Some family chaos that comes with being a father and don't be a zealot!
June 3, 2019
EP2: Health & Fitness Part 1
Arena 1: Health & Fitness. Tom and and Bert discuss nutrition, coffee, donuts and the importance of a cheat meals, or better yet a reward meal. Part 1 of our 3 part series on health and fitness.
May 27, 2019
EP 1 the extremely humble beginning
A brief introduction to the Dad Syndicate and the 7 arenas a father should live by.
May 20, 2019
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