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The Hot Nerd: Relationships

The Hot Nerd: Relationships

By China Noelle
Hot topics & relationship talk with Ivy League history-maker, journalist and hot nerd, China Noelle of (formerly founding editor of Madame Noire).
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S2/E3: The Ultimate Guide to Sex for Women Over 30 (Part 1)
Sex is such a frazzled and chaotic topic, and probably the subject of some of the worst advice you receive from your girlfriends who really don't know any better than you in this department, which is why you need to develop your own sense of dating independence, married-life independence, but most importantly, sexual independence. Tune in as I teach you how to establish your SexID™, which my copyrighted, trademarked, intellectually protected, sexually protected, sexual and intellectual IP, as you can see--but I am WILLING to share it with you, my listeners, because some of the smartest of us out there can be some of the DUMBEST in love and sex. Wanna learn from your hot nerd, China Noelle? Tune in now, share, and discuss, I've love to hear from you especially during these very odd times we're living in!
February 14, 2021
S2/E2: IMPORTANT - For My Single Ladies Out There!
Listen in as I blast the world with doses of valuable knowledge about singledom and its reverence, its meaning, and how to get unstuck from thinking that singleness is some kind of "problem." If you're single and don't know what to do with a single STATUS, then you're completing missing out on the privileges that are right before your eyes. Even if you have someone physical by your side, a good percentage of your actual, lived, psychology, i.e. the world according to your mind, isn't tangible, physical, or near you. So how optimal is that mind of yours, in your current state? Let's delve into this single versus taken discussion and bless you with some gems that will help you conquer your single state in ways you never considered before! Note: New episodes for the season are now being released every Sunday, so LISTEN AND SUBSCRIBE NOW.
January 24, 2021
S2/E1: How to Know You've Chosen the Wrong Partner - or The One
FEATURING SPECIAL GUEST: Ame the High Priestess of Love! Hey, HOT NERD: been thinking about "The One" in your life lately, have you? If you ask me, there are many "The Ones," and deciding on a partner isn't as draconian as old values and rules can scare you into believing, and while it may be scary indeed to have gone about the world thinking you've chosen the "wrong" partner, and while, yes, there are some very wrong, and embarrassingly awful, choices you can have made in love, all is not lost, darling. YOU are loved, just by being you--and there are so many tips, tricks, and more that you can apply when thinking about how to fashion your love life. Join me and my homegirl, Ame the High Priestess of Love, as we indulge in this first episode of Season 2! I'm excited to have my friends occasionally hop on with me in this new China & Friends format, right here on The Hot Nerd podcast, and I look forward to your breaking bread and relationship bytes with us!
November 29, 2020
S1/E18: What To Do If Your Lover Supports Trump
Now that we're only a few weeks away from Election Day in the United States, politics has ballooned in every conversation, even dating conversations, and it has begun to matter whom you're dating, what the person's political stance is, and whether you two can make it. For one thing, Trump supporters are controversial people to date, but many may not reveal themselves as his supporters--they may hide their affiliation. And is that okay with you in the dating space? Would you want to know if the man or woman you're dating supports Trump? And, if so, how would that person's political affiliation affect the way you relate? Would you break up with someone if you found out that the person had a different political affiliation than you? I'm giving you my two cents and more in this episode, so I'd love for you to join in! 
October 11, 2020
S1/E17: A Dating Guide For Women Over 30
Dating over 30 is not for the faint at heart, but if you're a woman on a mission and find yourself fumbling, this reflective podcast episode is for you! Putting yourself last and not knowing how to rely on your God-gifted common sense to make wholesome decisions, is a pretty common dating dilemma and we're going to tackle that dilemma with some red hot-nerd truths! Join me as I take on the most annoying and the most satisfying pieces of dating-wisdom nuggets that grown--and growing--women need to know! Listen in to The Hot Nerd podcast wherever podcasts are available. 
September 21, 2020
S1/E16: "Pretending to Be Black" & Other Hot Topics
Did you hear of the lady/professor, Jessica Krug, and how she'd been "pretending" to be black? That story is curious, like, why couldn't she just have taught African studies without the performance? Lots of folks from many backgrounds do! Join me as I unpack what on earth the deal is with Madame Krug, whom I'd have interviewed if she were willing, and let's get into identity in a hilarious and nuanced way. The issue isn't as clean-cut or black and white, no pun intended, as all the social media screamers make it seem. While folks like Jessica Krug and Rachel Dolezal are a lil wiggity whack for their identity performances, I'm not convinced that everybody else is so performance-free. Of course, not in the Krug/Dolezal vein, but--honey, chile...many of y'all's boyfriends be performing like they love you when they really don't. Zing! Okay, but seriously, identity is fluid, and these two cases of the black-identity pretenders need to be unpacked. Share your thoughts any time by leaving a message at and pressing the Message button. You can also listen to this podcast episode anywhere podcasts are found!
September 8, 2020
S1/E15: Toxic Relationships: You May Need to RUN From Family!
Did you hear Lauryn Hill's daughter, Selah Marley, discuss the beatings and rage with which her mother would approach her? Alas, toxicity begins at home, doesn't it? Some of the closest relationships in which you might find yourself, may be responsible for some of your most challenging traumas! With all the reckonings that have happened across so many movements, from #BLM to #MeToo, you'll find that many young people, like Selah Marley, like me, and like you...have a need to correct the horrid ways of the past and heal from the destructive behaviors that have been normalized into "culture." Lauryn Hill clearly traumatized her daughter, in Selah's own words, and after hearing Selah speak about that experience, Lauryn's response almost justified that childhood trauma through the lens of "culture!" Beware of what people tell you is your "culture," and beware, most of all, that those "people" will be your family members. Your healing might require you breaking from the people and things you love. I definitely had to break from my love for Miseducation of Lauryn Hill to set its creator straight in this episode, aptly titled: Toxic Family & Why I'm So F***ing Over Lauryn Hill. Tune in for one of my longest and most worthwhile episodes yet. Catch The Hot Nerd podcast, wherever you listen to podcasts, whether Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, iHeartRadio, or wherever else!
August 16, 2020
S1/E14: Dating, Married, & Unemployed
Times are rough, even if you're single, so you can imagine those who must share living spaces or emotional spaces with others in their dating or married lives--especially when money becomes a GARGANTUAN topic! Join as this episode explores how money makes men feel adequate or inadequate in relationships, even in same-sex ones. How do women who are unemployed in relationships cope and is their sense of self-worth as affected as when a man, who is expected to "provide," cannot in fact provide? The COVID-19 pandemic in many ways humbled a few households and relationships and the way we think about the term "no romance without finance" has come under major scrutiny. Can't wait to dig in? Press Play now & look for The Hot Nerd podcast on any listening platform from Spotify to Google Podcasts to Apple Podcasts and literally anywhere you listen in!
August 6, 2020
S1/E13: Your Husband Is Not On Bumble!
Role reversals are being taken to a totally different level with dating apps these days, and you really must tune in for some tea on how men tend to break rules and rites in modern dating, to the point where women are now finding themselves courting men? What's up with that? And, with particular communities, such as self-identified 'black' men in dating, would you agree that some men are overly heralded as "catches" whom women should chase? Let's dig into these topics, and more--even looping in the Kanye/Kim marriage, while we're at it, for an unforgettable episode to which you must listen now, HOT NERDS! 
July 21, 2020
S1/E12: Is Marriage Realistic? (Will & Jada Edition)
Sure Will Smith and Jada Smith have addressed the tea spilled by an artist (stating that he and Jada dated), but the way they addressed the situation sparked many interesting relationship and marriage questions that we HAVE to discuss! The main question is: do you think that marriage, as we know it, traditionally, is "realistic?" Do you believe that there are any changes in a husband/wife's approach that may be needed to sustain that pledged structure over time? Maybe there is something to staying open in how you may evolve or how your relationship may evolve over time, and not suffocating yourself into misery, simply because you believe no marriage template can bend or change. Let's get at it! Join me for a hot discussion now & catch The Hot Nerd Podcast on any platform or podcast app.
July 12, 2020
S1/E11: How to Stop A Partner From Gaslighting You
Did you know that some of us, women included/especially, are conditioned into wanting "connection" so much that our senses get suspended in the midst of relationships with people? We start to permit tiny little micro-aggressions, or put-downs, and other forms of sabotage, such as...GASLIGHTING? In this episode, I want to discuss gaslighting as it happens in intimate relationships, as well as on a societal level, and what we can do to detect and prevent it!  Subscribe to The Hot Nerd Podcast, anywhere you listen: Apple, Spotify, Google, and much more!
July 6, 2020
S1/E10: Dating in America Versus Dating Abroad
This hilarious episode about dating and marrying in the United States versus in the U.K. is sure to pique all the bicontinentally-curious minds out there. You don't have to rely on your physical space or reality(!); in this episode, we're digging into love interests from other worlds, with idiosyncrasies that vary from "how to make tea" (HINT: maybe not with an American microwave?) to whether it's okay for your date to come over to your house so soon. many unspoken rules, I tell ya! And what do they all mean for both single women and women who feel stuck in monotony? Let's dive right in, with this special chat about loving the folks around you and loving the folks who are new to your life's experiences. Check out The Hot Nerd Podcast on Apple Podcasts, Overcast, Spotify, Google, and anywhere you listen! 
June 28, 2020
S1/E9: What Are Your Relationship Patterns?
Do you push people away without knowing it? Do your insecurities create a veil of toxicity when it comes to dating and relationships? This episode is about self-examination of our relationship behavior pattens, but it's also about how other public figures in relationships have commented on their relationships in ways that make us probe our own behaviors! With Angelina Jolie's top news that she ended her relationship with Brad Pitt for "the wellbeing of her family," for example, it's like: gasp--we must dive more deeply into this maverick woman. Can mavericks truly be in relationships? How do you approach relationships goals? By pestering your partner, by being too aggressive, or too timid? If you're not feeling as healthy as you should in any relationship, whether at home or at work, there's always room for self-examination. Join me as we lift this issue up and shake it-shake it-shake it, aaaall the way down! 
June 21, 2020
S1/E8: Do We Demand "Social Change" But Make Zero Change In Personal Relationships?
All this violence and brutality from officials we trust to protect us can be an unforgivable betrayal, and it makes you wonder: whom else do you trust to protect you that ends up traumatizing you instead? Also, as we demand all this social change and take a stance against brutality, are we remembering to change the way we approach our loved ones at home? After all, it is incongruent to threaten your partner or child in the house, and get violent, or get abusive, while simultaneously demanding that others halt their violence! We need to take care of BOTH areas: we need to, yes, demand that the vile actions of trusted officials stop immediately, AND we must also watch our violence in relationships! In news headlines, we'll discuss  Dave Chappelle's very personal and very painful relationship to the national protests and the George Floyd tragedies. We'll also cover how all of this environmental stress and collective trauma intertwines with the latest research that says: everybody's having less sex! Tune in now to listen. Hit the "Follow" button or subscribe to The Hot Nerd Podcast anywhere you listen in--whether it's Apple Podcasts, Overcast, Google Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever! 
June 14, 2020
S1/E7: Dating or Marrying Someone With Differing Political Views
Rapper Eve set the record straight with critics who asked about the "difficult" conversations she's had with British entrepreneur hubby, Maximillion Cooper, and schooled us on the many conversations that people with different backgrounds in a union must have. In this episode, we're going to break down how and when to stick with, or leave, someone whose political views may be adding to or detracting from YOUR life progress. Tune in now and follow me on any of your fave podcast platforms: Apple, Google, Overcast, Spotify & more.
June 9, 2020
S1/E6: Self-Love & Healing in Times of Racial Trauma
George Floyd, Amy Cooper, and all the protests around the world: when does it end? How did racism find its way into our psyche during a serious quarantine period? And, how is your peace when the world breaks into pieces over this persistent evil of racism? Is the leadership around you aware of the vicarious trauma that you experience?  It's incredibly hard to stay focused and free when everything around you can fall apart so easily and brutally, as social media exposes how deeply toxic our society is. Join me to unpack the whos, whys, and whats of these turbulent times and take a stance against the biggest virus killing society: racism. Tune in now and follow me on any of your fave podcast platforms: Apple, Google, Overcast, Spotify & more.
May 31, 2020
S1/E5: Top 3 Reasons You Might Be Blocking Love & Happiness Right Now
You want to find The One, you want to date, you want your man to be this way, and you want the promises of happiness that seem to come with all these relationship tales on television and surrounding you. But, are you blocking your love and happiness in ways that you can't even see? How helpful is it to hang your sense of romantic joy on other people's opinions--especially if those "people" are not designed like you? Tune in with China Noëlle to break down three biggest reasons why you might be blocking love and happiness right now.
May 26, 2020
S1/E4: How To Level Up In Dating & Relationships
Are you always dating folks who are, in truth, not on your level? Ciara's story with Russell Wilson sounds fabulous, but what does "leveling up" really mean when it comes to relationships? Admit it: all relationships, in fact 100% of them, turn into mundane routines after the thrill of chasing--a love interest fades. What happens when you're dating or eyeing the wrong person, or when there's really nothing to chase anymore? In order to level up--and stay that way, we can't just do it one time, we have to find and MAINTAIN the thrill...partner with people who keep pushing with us to our next levels! And we can only do so by being honest about this episode's three areas of staying leveled up: 1) leveling up the self, 2) leveling up by not being afraid of money--and chasing it with someone who pushes you...and 3) leveling up your soul with the right person. 
May 18, 2020
S1/E3: (BONUS) Beauty Tips to Start Now & Look Fab When Lockdown Ends
Hey hotties & lovers, why not pimp indoor life by prepping NOW to be cute for when you can start dating your significant other, future bae, current love, or imagined sweetheart again--after quarantine? Let's talk beauty tips you should ritualize now, so that you'll be lit and glowing when lockdown ends, and you'll mesmerize your love interest like no other! Listen in, especially for my face and feet tricks, wink-wink!
May 16, 2020
S1/E2: Are Dating Apps Dead?
Swiping on dating apps is easy, but is the current environment really keeping the spark alive with Tinder, Bumble, and the like? In this episode, we'll break down dating app culture: why some of us were reluctant with it, how we got into it, how to detect the wrong people on it--and of course, the taboo topic of dating "preferences!" We'll also introduce the "hot nerd" concept and why you should be a HOT NERD too!
May 9, 2020
S1/E1: Introducing The Hot Nerd: Smart Love & Relationships, w. China Noelle
In this trailer, you're getting a hot taste of the juicy relationship topics to come. We're going to be discussing all the hot topics in the news as they relate to love/personal relationships, as well as perennial topics about LOVE. We're also going to be talking about whether you're settling, panicking too much about your relationship status, surrounding yourself with the right mates and friends in love, as well loving your own self as deeply and thoroughly as possible. It'll be the hottest, nerdiest, podcast you've ever heard--with me, China Noëlle, as your go-to gal!
May 9, 2020