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The Podcast Cantina

The Podcast Cantina

By Pod Eisley Cantina

The Podcast Cantina is the place where we talk Talkable Topical Topics like movies, shows, gaming and pop culture. Hosted by Jordan and Kyle, here to give you the worst takes on trending topics, not to mention overly convoluted breakdowns while we talk the plot, but funny. The Podcast Cantina is also home to The Pod Solo Show, where Jordan attempts a one man show to entertain and ramble on, and The Bounce with Kristian and Jordan, the podcast where we talk NBA, Society, and Cinema. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. Now that’s Podcasting!
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The Podcast Cantina Ep. 94: Dune Part 2 and St. Patrick’s Day

The Podcast CantinaMar 20, 2024

00:00
58:32
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 94: Dune Part 2 and St. Patrick’s Day

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 94: Dune Part 2 and St. Patrick’s Day

Ya, I like Dune 2. DUNE 2 CHICKS AT THE SAME TIME.
This might be the most exhausting and boring podcast we’ve ever done. You’ll love it.
LISAN AL-GAIB.
On todays episode of The Podcast Cantina, we start by introducing Ramsey to our Lady listeners out in Hess, Germany, the totally m botched Star Wars Battlefront II ASPYR re-release and unsafe for work rules of Final Fantasy 7 *REBIRTH*
Next, the Shrek 2 soundtrack vs Dazed and Confused soundtrack, Ramsey becomes director of media for the Illuminati as he celebrates 200 days sober from alcohol and has pledged sobriety for 200,000 more days straight (p.s that’s 547 years).
Jordan study of Bobs Burgers as dad preparation, a Son and his dad skating and guitars at park next to a Gay family, smelling reefer in the wild and I wish we could podcast outside.
Never let a random mf shoot the b roll
Vultures II
The family atomics
Dune 2 and Lisan Al-Gaib; was Jesus (a real person) an artificial messiah invented for the nefarious purposes of manipulating the masses? I hope not.
In honor of Muad’Dib, we are ranking movie mouses, explaining Godzilla, sneaky styrofoam Vodka Sprites aka The Water of Life, blue juice, blue milk, the only Green Day that matters aka St. Patrick’s Day history, the Irish, the IRA and snakes and CERVEZA CRYSTAL STAR WARS. Now that’s Podcasting!
P.S if you actually finish this episode and can prove it, I’ll send you $1.
Mar 20, 202458:32
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 93: Dune, aka The Boundless Light of Space Islam and Cocaine

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 93: Dune, aka The Boundless Light of Space Islam and Cocaine

ALL HAIL RAMSES THE 7TH, DUNE JIHADIST. Yes, Ramsey finally watched the first Dune movie in preparation for Dune Part 2 this weekend, which we will be reviewing. On today’s episode of The Podcast Cantina, we are talking about the boundless light of space Islam, getting high as hell on hallucinogenic cinnamon scented Spice, as well as the distillation and evolution of religious concepts that happens over the passage of time.
We talk the importance of physical media in an increasingly digital world, especially with the increased opportunity for revisionist history.
Once again, we’re back to talking Star Wars; the best and worst of the Sequel Trilogy (I KNOW), the missed opportunity of Finn as a Jedi, what if George LUKE-US came back to direct the next Star Wars movie and what it would be, and next podcast episode; what did George’s Sequel trilogy look like?
Ramsey gives Dune a 3.5/5 stars, a 70% Tomatometer. We close the podcast with Jordan explaining The (e)ffects of Melange Spice on the mind, the Butlerian Jihad, intergalactic travel and how hyperspace lanes work in Star Wars and Dune, oh ya and Helldivers 2! Now that’s Podcasting!
P.S: BeautifulBigTiddyButtNakedWomenJustDontFallOutTheSkyYaKnow??
Feb 29, 202446:42
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 92: 92: R.I.P Carl Weathers, On The Border, and calling the White House

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 92: 92: R.I.P Carl Weathers, On The Border, and calling the White House

What’s going on at On The Border? First things first R.I.P Carl Weathers. On another episode of Ramsey and Jordan stumbling upon success, we learn Jordan will never watch E.T; Ramsey is very concerned about the Alien Invasion going on at On The Border; getting way too high and calling the White House; all while taking the immigration test and passing with flying colors, not to mention learning the origins of shish-kabobs and teaching Ramsey about the Dune universe. We got Paul McCartney and The Wings (Twinks and Winks), what went down in Building 7? The building fell with such precision, No explosion no reasons given. We end the podcast talking about our celebrity friends, in the air tonight and next time coming prepared. Stick around till the end for a new outro from the Podcast Cantina. Now that’s Podcasting!
Feb 07, 202455:44
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 91: Johann Bach - Mass in B Minor

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 91: Johann Bach - Mass in B Minor

Ramsey and Jordan do the first podcast in Bravado Studios, so apologies in advance for this real laid back episode. Too many Zyn’s, too much vaping. Now, Johann Sebastian Bach, An innovator of musical composition and his famous work; “Mass in B Minor”. How does this legend compare to current artisan Ramsey “RamJam” Fam? We learn that and more in this podcast, as well as talking about Sobriety, Disney Gworls, Italian Dishes, we continue our journey of rewriting the Sequel Trilogy, and the consequences of hotboxing. Do people get dumber the older they get? Not closing internet tabs, Covid Conspiracies, and royalty free music. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jan 24, 202437:17
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 90: Return to The Roundtable

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 90: Return to The Roundtable

Kristian, Ramsey and Jordan celebrate Kristian establishing the newest Podcast Cantina HQ. On this comeback episode we’re talking Sharting, being a C list celebrity, the Pursuit of Happiness vs The Last Jedi, America rocks, Dua Lipa aka Women are the Highest Form of Art on the planet, and would you rather have 100+ body count or Alzheimer’s?
Jordan returns to the Champagne of Beer and won’t stop talking about our battles with alcoholism, Kristian learns about flushing toilets, and we learn about Ramsey’s fears of a Third World War and Total Global Destruction.
We’re back to talking Star Wars stuff including rewriting the Sequels, Ramsey has a problem with women in Star Wars, Top 3 women in Star Wars, are Clone Troopers real people and Kristian vs Oppenheimer.
Finally, we cover Suicide vs exercise, Ramsey doesn’t know how the movie Avatar works, stealing silverware from your parents when you move out, ranking Disney princesses, standing on bidness, phobias of annoying people, showering at the gym, what’s the gayest sport? In America it’s Soccer (football). Hockey is the manliest sport. Elden Ring is to Kristian as sports are to Ramsey. Edibles, Will Smith movies post Bad Boys 2, weary vs wary, casual drinking vs having a problem. Women derail a Man’s progress. We were supposed to play poker. Free pussy, free weed, Free Palestine. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jan 10, 202401:20:36
The Pod Solo Show: 4th Time’s the Charm

The Pod Solo Show: 4th Time’s the Charm

The first episode of The Pod Solo Show since the final day of 2022, welcome to The whatwasitalkingabout podcast. Nothing much here, just checking in with y’all and getting my legs back under me. On this sad excuse for an episode and 4th time “relaunching” this podcast, we’ll go over the future of The Podcast Cantina channel moving forward. Also mentioned: The New York Knicks, radical internet warriors, seeing Shane Gillis LIVE in KC, Vinny “The Microwave” Johnson and the Visigoths. Now that’s Podcasting! Stay tuned for more.
Oct 16, 202330:15
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 87: Slight Return

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 87: Slight Return

We’re back with a new and not so-improved podcast after our brief summer vacation. On todays episode you’re gonna get caught up with Jordan’s Positive intrusive thoughts, Kristian got a new puppy dog, the slippery slope of getting into Roman History, 1 free pass on the F word, as well as our rehabilitating efforts to become better about censoring ourselves and being a more socially acceptable safe for work podcast…
We’re also talking Scientology, Kanye on an Italian Boat, why does your YouTube algorithm always take you from the Torah all the way to Hitler, how does Jordan experience white privilege, being the BMOC, and Senators as horses.
Kristian recounts a tale during his European Crusades of the battle of being hassled by Africans and Indians outside of Vatican City, we discuss what was it like going to war with swords and bows but with less than perfect vision? The privilege of protesting and true freedoms vs the illusion of freedoms in America, and sneaky suspicions federal agents vs schizophrenic Americans on the internet.
How does a good hearted prospective congressional member evolve into a a corrupt tier 2 red power god in Washington? bathroom etiquette for men, sexism in the NBA, Big Mike vs Sleepy Joe and RFK Jr., is Obamna gay and on coke? Or gay and on crack? USA FIBA Basketball disappointment, editing the Wild Wild West, the pros and cons of having a puppy and people overpaying for dogs. Now that’s Podcasting!
Sep 13, 202301:15:35
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 86: You Don’t Fuck with Boys?

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 86: You Don’t Fuck with Boys?

We back y’all, sorry 4 the wait, Lil Wayne style. We’re talking Jesus and sipping lean in church, Kristian’s Europe trip, greedy Watto from Star Wars and more of the usual nonsense. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jul 13, 202301:12:51
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 85: Kristian Goes Global

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 85: Kristian Goes Global

First episode just Jordan and Kristian. We’re trying to stay on Talkable Topical Topics. Can’t figure out if this is Season 3 Episode 1? Or Season 2, Episode 26. Kristian is 17 again, Jordan is back from Colorado and Kristian is leaving for his Europe vacation, aka joining the Ukrainian army.
Getting drunk and watching Fast X on YouTube, ranking Fast and Furious Movies and babes, Tokyo Drift and what does DK stand for?
Trailer for Killers of the Flower Moon and Rise of the Beasts, Transformers flashbacks
Old 70s directors loving their black queens and The 70s was best decades for film and music.
LeBron saving America from China,
Directors we would want to work with,
IPA’s are always gross, and “The Cleveland Show”
Movies are shows
Enjoy Today, Right Now
People are either dogs, pigs, or sheep
The fall of empires seems to stem from powerful leaders failing to have a succession plan as well as ineptitude.
Trying to be empathetic to conflict that’s happening on the opposite side of the globe and Pissing on road trips. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jun 01, 202301:17:59
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 83: Cup of Coffee In The Big Time, Ooh Yeahhh

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 83: Cup of Coffee In The Big Time, Ooh Yeahhh

Is this the last 3 man Podcast we get with Kyle, Kristian, and Jordan? Prepare for the longest episode. description in Podcast Cantina history We open with Freudianism, we touch the tip of the iceberg of consciousness in an unconscious universe, who is the newly European Kristian, Kris Handsome? All the while we’re watching Game 7 of the Warriors vs Kings as Steph goes for 50.
Sadly, we’re all gonna miss each others birthdays this yea. We examine how impactful the coin flip is when it comes to making life decisions, why we don’t have sponsorships, and the first live edit of the podcast.
The potential for a 24 Hour LSD Podcast, Battling wasps and watching Game 7 of the 2016 NBA Finals while tripping balls, Playing Trivia Crack 2 against a random Asian lady somewhere in America, and who can see the shadow people?? Those who fight the effects of Benadryl and take acid alone in the dark.
Talking to hipster beard dudes at bars who are cucks for Joe Biden, being held hostage during social situations and how to politely exit a conversation, Sunday morning liquor store comrades, Kyle is a sleepy boi, the escapades of a Vagabond Kristian, plus we get a peek behind the curtain called Jordan’s childhood, aka the OG Battlefront II invincibility cheat code. Church parents vs drunk parents, Toxic Femininity, and The Behind Bars days with the bois.
Sleep and alcohol, do you prefer screwdrivers or a tequila sunrise for breakfast, how to keep on truckin with your feelings instead of pushing them down, Old Dogs, as well as; who has the best Bruce Buffer impression?
The real reason Andy didn’t keep his Toys,
Saddam Hussein hands you clubs when you go to Top Golf and how to bring 30 beers with you. The best and worst Cleveland Cavaliers jersey, the mild inconvenience of General Grievous and the Separatist’s raiding your town.
Booker T. Hernandez says “Hulk Hogan; we coming for you AHH…”
We criticize Richard Nixon for recording all of his conversations without even a hint of irony.
Cloning yourself to kill your self by doing a 360 No Scope until your future clones are all stuck in a time loop of killing themselves
Old Country vs New country, ranking the Carter Albums, we called the Kiss Me Thru The Phone # and sadly, it’s been disconnected.
Biden announces his bid for re-election
2,000 Miller High Life cans were destroyed in Belgium per a request from a French Champagne committee, saying the slogan “The Champagne of Beers” misleads the public and harms winemakers
How to identify your Starbucks barista, green squares vs black squares, being an XY ally,
Jordan getting into arguments about frozen chicken strips and mashed potatoes vs Chicken Fajitas and R.I.P Jerry Springer. Now that’s Podcasting!
May 04, 202302:14:52
The Podcast Cantina 82: Super Mario Bros Movie, 4/20 and Mando S3

The Podcast Cantina 82: Super Mario Bros Movie, 4/20 and Mando S3

Only two more episodes before Kyle leaves forever :( Kristian’s been drinking before going to Great Clips and getting lady boners over Jack Black, Kyle had house showings before selling his property to celebrate Earth Day! Jordan got a couples massage, no happy ending, fancy expensive anniversary dinners at French restaurants and watching The Super Mario Bros Movie! Kyle fell asleep during the ending though.
What’s up with the Bud Light TERF WARS?
Getting horny while watching the office, AFV hosts, Sitcom camera blocking, and how wet does your girl get when she watches the Jackass movies?
We’re talking The Mount Rushmore of Jack Black movies, Jordan hates romance movies and loves not watching the Tik Tok’s that anyone sends, briefly we mention the current conflict in the Sudan, No Trump during breakfast, The FDA pulling Pfizer off the market, the animosity of between Mexican family members, Kyle’s two tours of being a bartender, buying plan B, Jordan needs to stop chewing ice next to the microphone.
Uncertainty in the future of the MCU as Kang The Conqueror disrupts the timeline, aka Johnathan Majors News.
The Super Mario Bros Movie will lead into The Super Smash Bros Cinematic Universe, having illegitimate children in the Dominican Republic, dads are the easiest people to make fun of,
Kyle loves his wife, loves his family, he’s not racist, and yet he’s still very funny.
Briefly we mention The Mandalorian S3 and Mythosaur lore.
Plugging in an A.I Kyle into the Podcast after the REAL Kyle leaves. Now that’s Podcasting!
Apr 26, 202301:36:22
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 81: The Rizzler

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 81: The Rizzler

4/20 episode. Kyle and Jordan, we’re Rizzin and Jizzin. How long was FDR President? Almost as long it took us to figure out how long he was President. HBO vs Max? Evil Harry Potter reboot and TERF WARS, The Marvels trailer, Carrie Nation, Straight Gays vs Gay Gays, and Kristian is The Rizzler
We’re talking Furious and Faster; Colon Disaster, Using your variant hand for miscellaneous purposes, Logan Lucky, and
We process former President Trump in The Podcast Cantina police station, exclusive mugshot photos can be found LIVE on the podcast.
The True Israelites love Tim Allen shows,
Guys, we’re America, we can do anything we want! We own the finish line!
Why can’t all internet content be sunshine and rainbows and kitty cats? Why does it all have to be a nationwide media distraction from what’s really going on in the world?
Nothing 4/20 related in this episode. Maybe next time. Now that’s Podcasting!
Apr 20, 202301:12:08
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 80: Star Wars Celebration 23’

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 80: Star Wars Celebration 23’

Kyle and Jordan return to the classic format of talking about a nerd-centric gathering of like minded individuals. We’re talking Star Wars Celebration. All the announcements, all the inside information, all the lore and predictions; all right here at The Podcast Cantina. High Republic Phase III preview, Phase II thoughts, maybe a hint at the recipe for Porter Engle’s 9 egg stew? Also the LSD tigers, China and Collective Unconscious. No edits so enjoy all the ASMR sounds and potentially prolonged moments of silence as we watch the Celebration 23’ Livestream LIVE on the pod. Now that’s Podcasting!
Apr 10, 202301:38:21
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 78: Off The Rizz

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 78: Off The Rizz

Obamna Soda. It echoes throughout the podcast ominously. We can’t seem to get rid of it. Did you know that the Constitution was written so that we could have Coors Lights while riding John Deer mowers? We got Mormon soaking, more A.I presidents gaming, and talking the Tik Tok ban before one of our corespondents informed us of The Restrict Act, one of the most heinous pieces of legislation in American history.
Maggie Gylenhall makes a return to the podcast, and what happens when Tobey McGuire is deployed to Iraq and his brother Jake Gylenhall has sex with his wife? Should we stop watching videos on the podcast with no visual frame of reference for the audience?
The bois are back on the world stage, discussing the state of geopolitics, the seemingly imminent conflict with China and the future of America going to war with its biggest trade partner. What if The Podcast Cantina was the modern day Band of Brothers? Kyle is too old for the front lines, so clearly he would be safe.
Kristian informs us of the whereabouts of the TRUE LEADER OF NORTH KOREA and how he was banished to the Land of Disney, being shadowbanned in real life and “I understand what you’re saying, BUT…”. How drinking affects social interactions and everyday tasks, and we learn the rule of thumb that 2 Tall Boys is still only “2 Beers”. Kyle goes the extra mile, Jordan and Kristian pick starting 5’s of NBA American white dudes, 2010s starting 5s, and Every Villain is Lemons. A new nationalist movement, the French Revolution, systematic American oppression and the upcoming authoritarian regime. Also, Jonah Hill saves Kanye West from his anti-Semitic ways. Now that’s Podcasting!
Apr 04, 202301:44:54
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 77: St. Paddy's Musical Miracle

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 77: St. Paddy's Musical Miracle

St. Paddy’s Day, Full Blown RENT, explaining more March Madness to Kyle, Vil you Wear Wigs? What does a Stegosaurus taste like? Upcoming movies, we discover the source of our MIC SHOCK, our third host today is Jupiter The Stupider Dog, oh ya and we experience the full power of the BIDEN BLAST.
The local Pink Floyd laser show is certainly all 50 year old dudes on mushrooms, and surely must be the sickest vibes of all time
An Arrest Warrant issued for Vladimir Putin by the International Criminal Court on charges of KIDNAPPING. “Kremlin? More like Gremlin” - Kyle. That’s comedy.
Cheyenne makes a cameo to inform us about the danger of Chem-Trails, delusional mothers, and the evil Californian Communist, Governor Gruesome Newsom, and giving our podcast listeners a name; Canteeners.
Kyle and Jordan are stalling by doing play-by-play calls of the Kansas-State Kentucky game before we get into Jan. 6th conspiracies?? Mando Season 3 so far and Star Wars Calendar Days. Everything Everywhere All At Oscars and Whale that was a sweep.
Finally, after many attempts by Kyle, Jordan is convinced to watch the “musical” TIK TIK BOOM. Not bad? Didn’t hate it? Find out towards the end of the podcast. Kyle “reads with his ears” a book called “Mickey 7” a fun sci-fi book, Jordan rewatched The Northman and chugged a giant Miller High Life. Now that’s Podcasting!
Mar 28, 202301:37:42
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 76: He Has Rizzin

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 76: He Has Rizzin

The bois are back on the casting couch this week, sippin Vodka Root Beers and the single microphone we share makes a static sound whenever Kristian grabs it, so we apologize for the “technical difficulties”. Is this our last week springing forward? Lil Bill is more powerful than Goku, Kyle was the King of the Vato’s with ankle length Dicky’s, and would you rather have big forearms or big calves.
Thanks to our sociopolitical expert, Kristian, we’re talking Realism in politics and philosophy, including once again a brief mention of Henry Kissinger and J. Edgar Hoover; gay or just a man who likes to have sex with men? But we don’t go too deep (yet) on the horrors of maintaining national security.
This podcast is just Jordan trying to do segments that get detailed by his cohosts. We learn the truth about our “bois” from Hess, Germany aka our biggest foreign fans. Does the severity of the crime outweigh the talent of the criminal? Is it okay that I post the podcast a week after we recorded it?
Kristian crashes at the end of the pod, but not before he explains how club football works and laying the groundwork for our future conversation about Niche‘s writings comparing conventional morality vs objective morality by “flawlessly” breaking down the “trolly dilemma”.
Kyle reveals his conservative persona known only as “Rittenhouse”, and Jordan claims that if America won the World Cup, it would lead to the rest of the planet uniting against us in WW3. We get a sneak peek behind the curtain of Kristian’s dating life and how horrifying the local dating scene is by promoting the podcast on Tinder. Animals with the best eyesight, Spilling drinks and inside jokes. Now that’s Podcasting!
Mar 21, 202301:20:58
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 75: The Couch Pod Cantina

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 75: The Couch Pod Cantina

The bois are trying something new with the podcast today. We’re recording on a couch. That’s right, a real game changer in the podcast game. We watched the Lakers v Warriors Game in style As Kyle comfortably explains Lyle Lyle Crocodile Tik Toks and tries Leinenkugel Lemon Beer, Kristian defends how he would eat any animal, defining Mormon cultures family game night, and explaining offsides in “soccer”. The NPC argument returns, encountering NPC’s in real life, is Simu Liu an NPC agent? The British are cowards for giving up Hong Kong, PROJECT KELLY BLUE BOOK and Blue Beam make a return. In conclusion you can’t find us in the club, Pharmaceutical commercials are just community college brochures, more A.I President’s arguing, how we would be cops, eye contact with strangers and those we intimately know, laughing during The Shining, and hot white wife. Now that’s Podcasting!
Mar 13, 202301:31:01
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 74: Ant-Man Q-Anonamania

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 74: Ant-Man Q-Anonamania

American False Flag Operations. (2/24 recording). The bois review Ant-Man 3 (it was fine) before Jordan goes full Alex Jones mode. We’re talking the assault on American infrastructure, the horrifying realities of literary and media censorship, Kristian explains Marxism vs Free Speech, the history of Voting in America, Kyle has been on this earth longer than Credit Scores, Tax season is the spookiest time of year, and getting hammered at 80 for Brady. Our personal FBI agents are definitely paying closer attention to us after this one.
Mar 07, 202302:05:40
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 73: We Got the Morbs

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 73: We Got the Morbs

Just a couple of guys who got the morbs (Brit slang luv). On todays episode we start with motorcycle madness, big Trippin, and tasteful artistic representations of the female form. Kyle and Kristian once again attempt to persuade Jordan to watch AOT, remembering the Bionicle movies, and we do a not-so-deep dive on Jordan’s Ancestry results. As Kristian gives us valuable insight into the lore of The Last Airbender, could the Tales of Ba Sing Se save us from the impending Alien invasion? Is Gipetto on the flight logs? Kyle, who is clearly a Chinese sleeper agent, does his best Kermit Mahomes impression. Super Bowl Sunday and new movie trailers, the assault on America via ecological disasters, and Valentines Gay (Day). Now that’s Podcasting!
Feb 25, 202301:20:27
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 72: The Lost “Chinese” Balloon Files

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 72: The Lost “Chinese” Balloon Files

We done big goofed on this episode ya’ll. What the fuck happened to our 3rd and final recording? We were talking about the “Chinese” surveillance balloon but our last half hour of podcasting has disappeared. It must be government interference, so it’s a god damn conspiracy against The Podcast Cantina. Kyle and Jordan helm this weeks podcast into uncharted waters as we talk Groundhog Day, Knock at the cabin, Hand Vaginas, the state of the MCU, Leo DeCaprio’s taste for veal, the Gay Grammys, where to face Mecca in your home, the Up music, and of course, “Chinese” spy balloons. Now that’s Podcasting!
Feb 16, 202301:09:58
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 71: Artificial Unintelligence

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 71: Artificial Unintelligence

Another classic episode in the books as the bois hit the cold open, no theme song. Allen Iverson has kept himself busy making art and writing high school essays, but today we talked with the A.I chatbot Chat GPT by giving it pompous prompts from Mario apologizing to Princess Peach, Jesus meeting Nicki Minaj, Optimus Prime informs George W. Bush about a national tragedy, JFK and the CIA, the Epstein Flight Logs (you’ll be surprised) could Mark Wahlberg have stopped 9/11? Many unanswered sexual inquiries, and making the Artificial Intelligence question its individuality. C-3PO or Skynet? That’s all past the halfway mark but we’re also talking The Last of Us, America getting blue shelled, and how video games are just life, or that life is just like video games, man. Kyle battles a PBR, Jordan is defeated by simple tongue twisters, Kristian vs Jupiter the dog and he can’t get Goofy or Bill Clinton in the Chat GPT. We close the episode on That 90’s Show and the A.I helps Obi-Wan meet Shrek in his swamp. Now that’s Podcasting! (P.S. Can’t we settle this over a pint?)
Feb 09, 202301:33:41
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 70: All American SpongeBob Quotes

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 70: All American SpongeBob Quotes

Another classic episode where the boys quote SpongeBob the whole time, getting hype for MLK day, we’re talking bartending, Bionicle lore, should we hang up an American flag in the studio, Mecca Millions, breaking down Through the Fire and the Flames and GOAT guitar players. Once again we come around to the topic of circumcision, solving the Cartel “issue”, is all gas station meat Halal, what it means to be a protester and more as Kyle, Kristian and Jordan reach for the pinnacle of comedy podcasts. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jan 16, 202301:28:08
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 69: The 69th Episode New Years Eve

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 69: The 69th Episode New Years Eve

As we celebrate our 69th episode sipping frozen Pina Colada's, the guys are back talking Jar Jar Binks goes to Washington, what we got for Christmas 2022, 2023 New Years Resolutions, buying someone a 6 month BetterHelp Online Therapy only to have used the first 3 months for yourself, what’s Halal and what’s not, our live action Hentai musical, Martha Stewart vs Wesley Snipes, half of a Glass Onion Review, and Kristian’s unhealthy obsession with Mr. PB. Now that’s Podcasting!
Dec 31, 202201:35:56
The Pod Solo Show End of the Year Special

The Pod Solo Show End of the Year Special

The slight return, 2022 New Years Eve Episode
Dec 31, 202221:13
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 68: Pearl Harbor Bombs at the Box Office

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 68: Pearl Harbor Bombs at the Box Office

It’s the return of the Cantina, and the boys are back as we journey to the Pacific Theater to talk the anniversary of Pearl Harbor, getting Jamal’d, teaching Kyle how to read out loud, all the Hector’s in film history (Hint: there’s only one), was 9/11 just Al-Qaeda Kamikaze, The Cornfield chase from Interstellar is stoner theme music, Baldwin vs Spacey, and how to shake hands like a man. Oh and we go off the rails once againwith drunk SpongeBob, Manos de Piedra and bad impressions at the end of the show. Now that’s Podcasting!
Dec 12, 202201:16:41
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 67: Kanye’s Doctor

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 67: Kanye’s Doctor

It was a Jewish Podcast. Another classic episode with Kyle and Jordan joined by Kristian in person as we cover everything from Elon on Twitter to Kyle’s stand up comic debut and running for office based on our love for refrigerators. Before we close out the Pod we go and get our hunters safety licenses before heading over to Dave & Busters. Now that’s Podcasting.
Nov 21, 202201:08:07
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 66: La Hacienda

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 66: La Hacienda

The October episode of The Podcast Cantina sees Kyle and Jordan tackling the tough topics of our time, from all the BB_ acronyms and the lack of Mario’s Italian ass in the Super Mario Movie trailer to the girth of Greek statues and several random tangents. Kristian gets a phone call from the bois during our world famous “What’s that Mexican word” segment while we take Tequila shots out of “Don’t Mess with Texas” shot glasses. Oh ya She-Hulk finale and the return of the Huge Jacked Man. Now that’s Podcasting!
Oct 18, 202201:11:39
The Podcast Cantina 65: Death to The Queen, The Pizza Delivery Scandal and D23

The Podcast Cantina 65: Death to The Queen, The Pizza Delivery Scandal and D23

As we deal with deadly pizza delivery, The Queen is dead (finally), we’re munching on veggie chips and talking D23, the controversy surrounding the Lil’ Mermaid, and The Rings of Power (so far) and more out of pocket commentary. Now that’s Podcasting!
Sep 19, 202201:15:60
The Pod Solo Show: 9/11 Special

The Pod Solo Show: 9/11 Special

Welcome to the 9/11 Special Edition Episode of The Pod Solo Show. Everything from jet fuel vs steel beams, boxcutters vs Navy Seals, could Mark Wahlberg stop 9/11, the biggest thing that dropped that day was The Blueprint by Jay-Z and did a plane REALLY hit the Pentagon? We got it all covered. I’m also talking Clint Eastwood in For A Few Dollars More, diving headfirst into The Lord of The Rings lore, crackheads, and American Complacency in the modern age.
Sep 15, 202259:41
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 64: Mr. Bones

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 64: Mr. Bones

After we spent half an hour hanging out with Kyle’s new kitten, Mr. Bones, we’re back once again with our world famous Ezra Miller News segment, She-Hulk episodes 1-3, and a chaotic set of Talkable Topical Topics. We mention the multiversal versions of Kevin Feige who appear before the start of each Marvel show to point out where you are on the MCU timeline. Kyle can’t stay awake during any movies but did we watch Nope? Yep. Prey? Kyle fell asleep. The Grey Man? Kyle fell asleep. Bullet Train? Yes. We close out the episode with a What We Reading/Listening/Watching segment in between petting all of the cats and finally befriending the dog, Jupiter. Now that’s Podcasting!
Sep 05, 202201:12:43
The Pod Solo Show: Episode 18

The Pod Solo Show: Episode 18

After another hiatus of 3 months, The Pod Solo Show returns once again in a Ramblin’ storm of life updates, conspiracies, and mentioning an interesting topic to talk about at a later point only to resume rambling about something far less important and losing track of what I was saying anyways. Now that’s Podcasting!
Aug 29, 202235:37
Episode 63: Captain Dick Cum, SDCC 22 and Marvel Phase 4 Review

Episode 63: Captain Dick Cum, SDCC 22 and Marvel Phase 4 Review

Joined by comic book connoisseur Keenan, on todays episode Jordan and Kyle are talking our Ms. Marvel Review, we rank everything Marvel Phase 4 (spoiler alert: Eternals sucks) and the big San Diego Comic Con 2022 announcements, except for Marvel Phase 5. We do this thing during podcasts where we never get around to talking about certain things, so instead we’re saving that for next weeks episode with a very special guest. Oh ya and there’s a special edition Pro Abortion advertisement hidden in the podcast. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jul 25, 202201:21:24
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 62: Thor: Love and Thunder

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 62: Thor: Love and Thunder

Gather round and listen to the tale of Kyle and Jordan, The Pod of Thunder. On this Thunderous episode of The Podcast Cantina, Kyle and Jordan return to talk briefly about the hide and seek competition between Anne Frank and Hitler himself, but mostly Thor: Love and Thunder. If you want to rudely skip all of our friendly banter and random useless facts layered with zealous zingers, skip ahead to around the 30 minute mark for our review of the movie, Thor: Love and Thunder. We breeze through a variety of other topics from the nostalgia of rewatching movies and the way Covid reshaped the timeline of the MCU
to Lightyear and Kyle spoiling the ending of Stranger Things Season 4. We repeatedly enter the 5th Dimension of the Twilight Zone before ending with Live Action Lightning McQueen, White Lightning and Gator and oh yeah, Kenobi Finale. There’s a lot of pain in the world, but not in this Podcast. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jul 11, 202201:30:39
The Podcast Cantina 61: Jurassic World Dominion, Ms. Marvel Premiere and Stranger Things

The Podcast Cantina 61: Jurassic World Dominion, Ms. Marvel Premiere and Stranger Things

Kyle makes too many Tik Tok references in this episode of The Podcast Cantina. Ezra Miller strikes again, committing crimes in a flash before going on the run.
High 5 Testing, how to properly hold a cat, 2Pac’s Birthday, Alright Alright Alright in Space and everyone loves Jon Hamm.
It’s about drive, it’s about power, it’s about the Black Adam trailer briefly before Jordan recommends the best movie of the summer to Kyle, Top Gun Maverick.
Our Talkable Topical Topics include the first two episodes of Ms. Marvel, the Stranger TINGS twist that Kyle fell asleep for (boombaclot) and Jurassic World: Dominion (Dominatrix). What’s the focus with locusts? We plan out the next set of Jurassic Park movies, including the 4th installment in the series, Jurassic: World Extinction and concluding with Enter the Jurassic-Verse. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jun 18, 202201:18:27
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 60: Kenobi, Star Wars Celebration 22', The High Republic

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 60: Kenobi, Star Wars Celebration 22', The High Republic

The Season 2 Premiere of The Podcast Cantinta takes us back to a galaxy far, far, away in this Star Wars jam-packed episode. We’re talking the series premiere of Space Jesus I mean Obi-Wan Kenobi, everything big news story from Star Wars Celebration 2022, and we talk about our reading experiences with Star Wars: The High Republic, the biggest publishing initiative by Star Wars since the 90s. We close out the episode with the Thor: Love and Thunder Trailer and discovering that Paddington 2 is the highest rated film in cinema history. Now that’s Podcasting!
May 30, 202201:24:09
The Pod Solo Show: Winning Time

The Pod Solo Show: Winning Time

After a two month hiatus, The Pod Solo Show is back in dramatic fashion.
May 27, 202232:18
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 59: Dr. Strange 2, Season 1 Podcast Finale and Moon Knight Pt. 2

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 59: Dr. Strange 2, Season 1 Podcast Finale and Moon Knight Pt. 2

We didn’t have a Season 1 before this episode but now we’re back after a month hiatus with Dr. Strange: In the Multiverse of Madness, the Moon Knight Finale, the cultural significance of George Lopez and the Fast and the Furious, Thor: Love and Thunder Teaser, and the Johnny Depp redemption tour. Now that’s Podcasting!
May 11, 202201:59:23
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 58: Moon Knight Pt. 1 Unhinged 420 Blaze It Special

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 58: Moon Knight Pt. 1 Unhinged 420 Blaze It Special

One week later than recorded, we’re dropping our 420 Blaze it special edition episode of The Podcast Cantina. In between unapologetic bites of chips and homemade guacamole, we are talking Moon Knight episodes 1-3 in completely unhinged fashion. This is another chapter in the “Off The” series of podcasts we do here sometimes, because we get off track as often as we can. We don’t really get around to Pulp Fiction because we just let loose on some raw dog thoughts. You can find a brief summary of the movie as the podcast gets derailed during the last ten minutes, also, “Jack and Jill” is the only Al Pacino movie that Kyle’s seen. (P.S the last two minutes are a blender ASMR test audio). Now that’s Podcasting!
Apr 22, 202201:04:13
The Bounce: Kansas Jayhawks ‘22 Champs and NBA Playoffs Predictions

The Bounce: Kansas Jayhawks ‘22 Champs and NBA Playoffs Predictions

After a long hiatus, The Bounce is back and better than ever. Kristian and Jordan return to talk about the Kansas Jayhawks winning the 2022 NCAA Championship during one of the craziest months of March Madness ever, and NBA Playoffs predictions. Everything from MVP to play-in games to us throwing money on some teams to make it even more interesting. In conclusion, we talk about the trash ass Lakers and what the future holds for some of the worst general management in sports.
Apr 13, 202201:17:36
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 57: Morbius vs Mobius vs Morpheus

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 57: Morbius vs Mobius vs Morpheus

This is a legendary episode for The Podcast Cantina. Not only did we record our very first advertisement during this podcast, this is our first episode with a visual medium. We filmed the whole episode, and you’ll be able to see that soon over at The Podcast Cantina YouTube channel! Today’s Talkable Topical Topics include Morbius vs Mobius vs Morpheus, Ms. Marvel trailer, that slap at the Oscars that was still more well received than Amy Schumer and maybe a little Moon Knight? Also that stupid windows vs wheels vs doors thing and battle of the body counts between Wilt Chamberlain and Joel Schumacher. Now that’s Podcasting!
Apr 04, 202201:15:54
The Pod Solo Show: March Madness

The Pod Solo Show: March Madness

The Pod Solo Show celebrates Kansas making the Final Four, mental health during this Motivational March Madness and practicing physical discipline by getting back into playing basketball. All the while going undefeated in Wordle, starting a YouTube channel, not comparing yourself to others by focusing on oneself and bad bracket predictions. The Pod Solo Show is getting bigger and better with expired beer, probiotics vs gas prices, celebrating St. Patty’s Day, ICT comic con and running into witchy mediums while crystal shopping with your girlfriend. Now that’s Podcasting.
Mar 29, 202201:23:10
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 56: The Batman aka La Rata Man

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 56: The Batman aka La Rata Man

Finally, after surviving a failed assassination attempt, Kyle was able to see THE BATMAN. The Riddler left him a food poising poem, a problem solved by Robert Battinson and The Podcast Cantina, but before we cover that for our last half hour, riddle me this; why would we do an episode full of shitty Seinfeld impressions as we cover the Kenobi teaser, The Boys trailer, Daylight Savings, Jordan’s Peacemaker review (Kyle only watched the first and last episode??) Tik Tok content creators vs Russia, Putin vs Meta, and the shitty Father Stu trailer with Marc “Would’ve stopped 9/11” Wahlberg? Because of Now that’s Podcasting, that’s why!
Mar 15, 202201:37:39
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 55: Off The Bada-Bing, Bada-Boom

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 55: Off The Bada-Bing, Bada-Boom

Since Kyle survived an assassination attempt, we’re doing The Batman next episode. This turned into a fun filler podcast, with Kyle and Jordan attempting to talk about all the shows and movies Kyle was supposed to watch (but didn’t) with surprise guests phone calls from Kristian and Ramsey, off the wall topics, Putin and the Ukraine, Biden State the Union while Pelosi is zooted, and much more nonsense. Now that’s Podcasting!
Mar 11, 202201:05:29
The Pod Solo Show: The Time is Now

The Pod Solo Show: The Time is Now

On this episode of The Pod Solo Show, the weather is getting better while I get my confidence back and practice self discipline. As I discuss the vicious cycle that is happiness in the moment at the expense of the future, I also talk about working on work ethic, practicing perspective, fighting the reefer madness, and exercising with demons. I mention Putin playing the Modern Warfare trilogy in live action while the Ukrainian President holds it down, White Apology Month, shitty military recruitment ads and the evolution of drone tactics in the 21st century.
Mar 07, 202201:01:13
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 54: Dr. Steven Harvey, Sorcerer Supreme

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 54: Dr. Steven Harvey, Sorcerer Supreme

What was initially planned as our Book of Boba Fett episode quickly turned into one of our most off topic and entertaining podcasts ever. We’re supposed cover best and worst Super Bowl halftime shows, Valentines Day gone wrong; instead we’re talking Dr. Steven Harvey Strange as the Family Feud Supreme and there’s Multiverse of Madness going on in this edition of the Pod Nightly Cantina. This is one of my favorite episodes we’ve ever done, maybe the best in the history of podcasts. Now that’s Podcasting!
Feb 17, 202202:09:05
The Pod Solo Show: Return of The Bounce with Kris P

The Pod Solo Show: Return of The Bounce with Kris P

A special edition episode, this weekend update includes a rambling intro followed by the return of The Bounce, the NBA and Cinema Connoisseur podcast with Kristian, aka Kris P Kristian Strips.
Feb 12, 202252:31
The Pod Solo Show Ep 13: Stone Cold

The Pod Solo Show Ep 13: Stone Cold

We’re going Stone Cold on this one, not Steve Austin sadly cause we’re not catching and slamming cold ones with the boys but instead we’re talking about the Stone Cold state of the union, the weather, and seasonal depression. If the glass is half full I’m also talking about wanting more out of myself, what creative avenues I want to experience and an overall sense of what I want to do with myself. It’s a short and not so sweet episode this week, but I’ll make up for it soon.
Feb 08, 202240:28
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 53: Moon Knight Trailer

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 53: Moon Knight Trailer

The Moon Knight trailer is finally here. Why does Oscar Isaac use different accents? What’s real and what isn’t? Will this be the best Marvel show yet? We answer all these questions and more as we cover all the Talkable Topical Topics like The Book of Boba Fett so far, seasonal depression and Kyle learns what Euphoria is. Meanwhile we check in on our portfolios right when crypto takes a dive, hurting the $10 i have in Ethereum, and we ask why there are NFT profile pics on Twitter? We briefly mention the Ukraine and Biden, the United States borrowing the credibility of Tom Hanks and more random rambling. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jan 25, 202201:41:03
The Podcast Cantina Ep. 52: The Year of the Tiger

The Podcast Cantina Ep. 52: The Year of the Tiger

It’s the Year of the Tiger. If you’re unsure of what that means, you might be at the wrong podcast. If you’re interested, however, the first few minutes will inform you about what it means to be the born in the Year of the Tiger. Also we’re taking most anticipated shows and movies for the year. Pour one out for Betty White, Bob Saget and Joe from Impractical Jokers. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jan 18, 202201:29:33
The Pod Solo Show Ep. 12: New Year, New Me...Again

The Pod Solo Show Ep. 12: New Year, New Me...Again

A rambling ensemble of recordings that excentuates what the Pod Solo Show truly is. As I move from New Years Eve to New Years Day, I talk about the future of the podcast, 2022 Resolutions and more in a most emphatic fashion. Now that’s Podcasting!
Jan 10, 202253:30