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Therapists In The Wild

Therapists In The Wild

By Molly and Liza

"Therapists, they're just like us!" Two friends and psychologists, Molly and Liza, discuss how they use Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) skills to navigate relationships with themselves and others. In each episode, you will learn about DBT skills that will help you increase mindfulness, better regulate emotions, tolerate distress, and enhance communication in relationships.

​If you'd like to support our work, you can donate any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. Thank you for your contribution!

Insta/FB @TherapistsInTheWild and Twitter @TherapistsWild.
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31. Gaining Distance from Thoughts with Cognitive Defusion

Therapists In The WildNov 01, 2021

00:00
58:45
35. Ending Dialectically
Apr 01, 202249:50
Re-Release: How To Stop Fighting Reality with Radical Acceptance

Re-Release: How To Stop Fighting Reality with Radical Acceptance

This month's episode is a re-release of an episode introducing one of our favorite DBT skills: Radical Acceptance (Episode 23). We hope you enjoy and look forward to being back next month for the final episode of Season 2! 

*You can find us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild. If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review. Thank you!

Mar 01, 202251:31
34. DBT Skills for Burnout

34. DBT Skills for Burnout

"Burnout" has become a buzzword since the start of the pandemic, for good reason. Many of us are feeling burnt out, in many areas of life, and could benefit from using DBT skills to cope. 

In this episode, Molly and Liza start by defining burnout (i.e. chronic depletion, apathy, a feeling of ineffectiveness no matter how hard you work). We then identify factors that typically lead to burnout, like feeling that your day-to-day lacks meaning or that you lack control over your daily decisions. We explain how to tell the difference between burnout, depression, and stress, and why these distinctions matter. 

We respond to an email from a listener who wants to know how seriously to take feelings of burnout, and when to consider making a change. Pulling from Emily and Amelia Nagoski's work, we describe the science behind what burnout does to our bodies and how we can effectively complete the body's stress response cycle. We outline various DBT skills to apply both during extreme moments of burnout (i.e. intense exercise, mindfulness, urge surfing, self-validation, vacation), and when making larger life decisions in response to burnout (i.e. taking an inventory using mindfulness skills, problem-solving, and focusing on values). We hope you enjoy! 

We will be taking next month off and, in the meantime, will be re-releasing an old episode on March 1. We look forward to being back on April 1 for our final episode of the season! 

*Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild. If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you!

Feb 01, 202257:16
33. Vulnerability in the New Year

33. Vulnerability in the New Year

Jan 01, 202252:50
32. Practicing Self-Compassion

32. Practicing Self-Compassion

This month on TITW, we're practicing self-compassion. Liza and Molly have been studying the work of Dr. Kristin Neff, a psychologist and researcher who breaks down the practice of self-compassion into concrete steps. We've noticed a lot of overlap between Dr. Neff's work and DBT skills, and we discuss the similarities in this episode. 

We start by defining self-compassion and how it's all about being a friend to yourself. We then get into the barriers of practicing self-compassion (i.e. the erroneous belief that beating ourselves up is the only path toward self-improvement), and point out how taking a more dialectical approach while being kind to ourselves actually leads to more effective problem-solving and learning from mistakes. Molly and Liza each share personal examples of times they have both practiced self-compassion, and, more often, times they have beat themselves up to the point of blocking effective action. We discuss the benefits of practicing self-compassion, and provide a step-by-step approach to the practice, using DBT skills including Mindfulness of Current Emotion, Radical Acceptance, Nonjudgmental and Dialectical Thinking, and good old Opposite Action. We hope you enjoy! 

If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you!

*Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

Dec 01, 202145:06
31. Gaining Distance from Thoughts with Cognitive Defusion

31. Gaining Distance from Thoughts with Cognitive Defusion

This month on TITW, Molly teaches Liza and our listeners concepts from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), another "third wave" cognitive behavioral treatment that both overlaps with and differs from DBT. 

Molly has been practicing ACT at her therapy practice, and Liza... needs to brush up on her skills! First, Molly walks us through the six core processes of ACT, including "Cognitive Defusion," which is the process of watching thoughts come and go rather than getting caught up or buying into them. In some ways, this episode is a deep dive on the "Mindfulness of Current Thoughts" skill from the DBT Distress Tolerance module. We discuss how most humans experience unwanted automatic thoughts, and how we those of us with "stickier" brains can benefit from relating differently to such thoughts. We teach several defusion strategies, and also discuss how to use the DBT skill of "Check the Facts" to increase willingness to use these techniques. We wrap up with a coaching session! 

Here are some books to help you learn more about ACT: 

1) Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life 

2) The Happiness Trap

3) ACT Made Simple: An Easy-to-Read Primer on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you!

*Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

Nov 01, 202158:45
30. Overcoming Procrastination and Hyper-Productivity

30. Overcoming Procrastination and Hyper-Productivity

This month on TITW, Liza and Molly share their personal experiences with procrastination (Molly) and, on the other side of the dialectic, hyper-productivity (Liza). We believe that procrastination and hyper-productivity are opposite responses that function to avoid similar feelings of anxiety. 

We define procrastination as knowing a task needs to get done and choosing to do something else instead. Hyper-productivity is a term we invented based off of Liza's experience of feeling the urge to constantly be productive and complete tasks immediately.

Through an impromptu chain analysis Liza conducts on Molly's procrastination behavior, we learn about what drives this behavior and how to change it. We work together to identify factors that increase vulnerability to procrastination; thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that lead up to the procrastination behavior; as well as the short- and long-term consequences associated with procrastination. 

Make sure to listen to our skills review at the end of the episode, where we give ourselves homework and offer concrete suggestions for how to overcome urges to procrastinate or engage in hyper-productive behavior. 

We hope you enjoy!

Oct 01, 202147:44
29. Buddhism and DBT ft. Keerthi Reddy

29. Buddhism and DBT ft. Keerthi Reddy

This month on TITW, we are taking a break from discussions about skills to have an exploratory conversation about Buddhist philosophy, which inspired the practice of DBT. We speak with a special guest, Keerthi Reddy, a masters student at the Harvard Divinity School, who is focusing her studies on Zen Buddhism. First, Liza and Keerthi (old friends from college!) discuss the concept of suffering according to Buddhism, and how accepting reality as it is, and not the way we have been conditioned to interpret it, can reduce suffering. Liza and Keerthi talk about Buddhism as an ethical practice, and explore some critiques of "packaging" Buddhist principles and incorporating them into mental health treatments and in other settings. Through a personal example, Keerthi gives advice on how to separate our experience of reality from reality itself, in order to increase freedom and focus. 

In the second half of the episode (starting at 41:00), Molly and Keerthi discuss trauma and spirituality, and specific Buddhist principles that may help with healing from suffering. Keerthi provides more practical advice on how to practice meditation and mindfulness while experiencing trauma-related symptoms. Finally, we discuss how religion and spirituality can help people make meaning from trauma. We hope you enjoy! 

If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you!

*Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

Sep 01, 202101:13:29
28. Responding Skillfully to Feedback

28. Responding Skillfully to Feedback

In this month's episode of TITW, we address a therapy hot topic (and one that Liza and Molly discuss regularly with each other off-air): how to accept feedback in both personal and professional settings, especially when (you perceive) it is negative. We explain why feedback can feel so hurtful to receive, and, on the other side of the dialectic, why it is so often necessary for growth. We share examples from our own lives, particularly throughout our therapist training, of times when even the most upsetting comments have helped us evolve and move toward our values. Understandably, when Emotion Mind shows up, it can be easy to miss the "kernel of truth" in others' input on your behavior. Therefore, we discuss how to use DBT skills in the moment to stay mindful and effective rather than respond impulsively. We give tips on how to manage repetitive negative thoughts related to what was said, and how you might eventually respond once you are in Wise Mind. Finally, we address how to incorporate Self-Respect ("FAST") skills when responding to feedback, particularly if you disagree with the content or how it was delivered. We hope you enjoy and find this episode helpful! 

...And speaking of feedback, we welcome your feedback and would love to hear from you! Please email us at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com and let us know how you've been enjoying Season 2 so far. 

If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you! 

*Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

Aug 01, 202155:33
27. Living with Borderline Personality Disorder ft. Mental Health Advocate Chris Jones
Jun 14, 202101:00:54
26. When Not To Use Opposite Action

26. When Not To Use Opposite Action

The TITW are officially back for *Season 2* of the podcast! We start off with a few exciting updates, since we can't wait to share what we've been working on during the season break. We discuss plans for the future of the podcast as well as the launch of our new website (!):  therapistsinthewild.com. Please check us out to learn more about the consulting/coaching services we are now offering for therapists and professionals in related fields, or to learn more about us and browse additional DBT resources.

Then we get into the topic for today’s episode: when are unwanted emotions - like anger and hurt - effective to act on, rather than act opposite to? We start this discussion off with examples of dogs and babies who seem to have no trouble expressing unwanted emotions, indicating that there may be an evolutionary function of expressing the emotions we feel. We discuss the benefits of effectively expressing how you feel in the moment, including increasing self-respect and improving relationships. We know firsthand how difficult it can be to know when and how to effectively express feelings like anger, sadness, grief, and shame, so we discuss the function of each emotion and provide examples to guide you through using this technique. The episode ends with a few key points to help you determine whether to use the tips discussed in this episode vs. the skill of opposite action.

Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com! And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild, and email us with questions/feedback at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com.

May 17, 202152:24
Bonus: DBT and Valentine's Day
Feb 10, 202151:00
25. How To: Stay Skillful
Dec 14, 202055:45
24. How To: Practice Radical Acceptance with "Willing Hands" and "Half Smile"
Dec 07, 202051:37
23. How To: Stop Fighting Reality with Radical Acceptance
Nov 30, 202051:30
22. How To: Self-Soothe and Distract With "ACCEPTS"

22. How To: Self-Soothe and Distract With "ACCEPTS"

Nov 23, 202050:35
21. How To: Surf Urges and Tolerate Distress Using "TIP"
Nov 09, 202050:31
20. How To: Survive a Crisis Without Making It Worse
Nov 02, 202044:50
19. How To: Stay Grounded During Stressful Times
Oct 26, 202015:20
18. How To: Honor Your Self-Respect Using "FAST"
Oct 19, 202051:25
17. How To: Maintain and Improve Relationships Using "GIVE"
Oct 12, 202057:44
16. How To: Get What You Want Using "DEAR MAN"
Oct 05, 202054:12
15. How To: Prioritize Goals in Interpersonal Interactions
Sep 28, 202055:57
14. How Emotion Dysregulation Develops with Dr. Kiki Fehling
Sep 14, 202052:46
13. (In)Validation With Hillary Ditmars

13. (In)Validation With Hillary Ditmars

Molly and Liza are joined by a special guest, Hillary Ditmars, a skilled DBT therapist nearing the end of her doctoral program in Clinical Psychology (and Liza’s close friend and college roommate!). Hillary has experience providing DBT to adolescents and families in partial hospital and intensive outpatient programs, and has taught the skill of validation in both multi-family and parent-only settings. In this episode, we explore the key concept of validation, as well as its reverse: invalidation. Validation involves communicating to another person that their feelings, thoughts, or actions make sense and are understandable in a particular situation. We teach how to validate yourself and others, and also discuss how these are key skills for emotion regulation and effective interpersonal interactions. Conversely, invalidation involves denying, rejecting, or dismissing another person's feelings by communicating that their subjective emotional experience is inaccurate, insignificant, and/or unacceptable. We discuss short- and long-term effects of invalidation, including self-invalidation, exaggerated expression of emotions, increased dependence on others, identify confusion, and more. We wrap up the episode with another nerdy DBT exercise: The Validation Game, in which we practice these skills and reflect on how it feels to be validated vs. invalidated by each other. We hope you enjoy! 

*Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild

Sep 07, 202059:34
12. How To: Build Mastery and Cope Ahead

12. How To: Build Mastery and Cope Ahead

Welcome to TITW: Sports Edition! In this episode, Molly and Liza use an uncharacteristic amount of sports examples to illustrate the last two skills of the Emotion Regulation module: Building Mastery and Coping Ahead. Before we get into the material for the week, we share listener examples of go-to pleasant activities, and Molly describes a recent situation where being overly goal-oriented increased suffering and refocusing on values reduced suffering. Next, we explain how to Build Mastery by doing things that make you feel competent and effective to combat helplessness, hopelessness, and even depression. Liza and Molly discuss what we can all learn from the most successful professional athletes in terms of building mastery. To wrap up the module, we teach how to Cope Ahead of time with emotional situations. This includes rehearsing a plan ahead of time to prepare you to cope skillfully with anticipated challenges. Finally, Liza coaches Molly to Cope Ahead for and Build Mastery in playing tennis. We hope you enjoy :)

*Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild 

Aug 31, 202055:36
11. How To: Build A Life Worth Living

11. How To: Build A Life Worth Living

In this episode, Liza describes how she applied the coaching from last week's episode on Problem Solving and Mindfulness of Current Emotions and Thoughts to email her neighbors about the noise, and shares their surprising response ;) We then transition into teaching how to reduce vulnerability to Emotion Mind in order to build a Life Worth Living. We start with the most straightforward (and not always easy) way to take care of your mind by taking care of your body: the PLEASE skills, which, if you've ever been "hangry" like we have, you will intuitively understand. We then discuss how Accumulating Positive Emotions in the short-term by doing one pleasant activity per day increases the likelihood that you will respond effectively to whatever life throws at you -- like putting money away for a rainy day. Lastly, we explain how to Accumulate Positive Emotions in the long-term in order to build a Life Worth Living. This is done by identifying core values, which give our lives meaning, and using those values to guide the process of setting goals and taking action steps. We hope you enjoy! 


*Please email us at therapistsinthewild@gmail.com or DM us on Instagram or Facebook @therapistsinthewild with examples of pleasant daily activities you engage in so we can share them on social media and on next week's episode!

Aug 24, 202052:16
10. How To: Keep Calm and Problem Solve

10. How To: Keep Calm and Problem Solve

It is our tenth episode of TITW! This week, Molly and Liza start by sharing how they practiced Opposite Action in work-related situations: Molly used it to combat procrastination urges and feelings of shame about avoiding "paperwork" (a word no one wants to hear), and Liza used it to set boundaries around doing work at night. We then introduce a creative approach to Problem Solving, which can be used when your emotion and its intensity does fit the facts, and the situation is the problem. Using examples, we walk you through the steps of how DBT approaches problem-solving, which we hope will expand your repertoire of potential solutions to any given problem. Because a fear or unwillingness to experience uncomfortable thoughts and feelings is often a barrier to effective problem-solving, we then teach you how to apply Mindfulness of Current Thoughts and Emotions when unwanted emotions arise. We end the episode with Molly helping Liza apply these skills to the (very relatable) problem of confronting noisy neighbors. We hope you enjoy! 

Aug 17, 202001:05:09
9. How To: Act Opposite to Emotion Urges

9. How To: Act Opposite to Emotion Urges

This week, Liza and Molly share examples of Checking the Facts to regulate emotions. Molly gives tips for changing interpretations when having trouble falling asleep, and Liza talks about a time when asking another person to Check the Facts for you can successfully alleviate anxiety. We then introduce one possible "step 3" in your emotion regulation playbook by describing one of our all-time favorite skills: Opposite Action, which can be used when your emotion and/or emotional intensity does not fit the facts, and/or it would be not be effective to act on your emotion urge. We teach you the steps of Opposite Action through the examples of combating both pandemic-related depression and "white fragility." Instead of our typical coaching, we end the episode by sharing our story of using Opposite Action to start the podcast. We hope you enjoy! 

Aug 10, 202051:37
8. How To: Check the Facts to Change Reactions

8. How To: Check the Facts to Change Reactions

In this episode, Liza and Molly share their experiences distinguishing between their primary vs. secondary emotions over the past week. We reflect on how early learning history, which includes gender socialization, affects how we understand, respond to, and cope with present events. Then, we get into the skill of the week: Check the Facts, which is the second step in the process of emotion regulation after identifying the emotion. Changing interpretations, beliefs, and assumptions to more accurately fit the facts of the situation enables us to have very different emotional reactions to the same situation. We review the steps involved in Checking the Facts when interpretations like, "they must be mad at me" show up while waiting for a delayed text back. We highlight the final step of this process: actually determining whether your emotion -- and/or its intensity -- fits the facts of a situation (hint: consult Wise Mind!). Finally, Liza coaches Molly on how to Check the Facts related to dog-mom shame and beliefs like, "I'm an irresponsible dog mom" that arise when Wilson misbehaves on walks. We hope you enjoy! 

Aug 03, 202001:01:29
7. How To: Know What You're *Really* Feeling

7. How To: Know What You're *Really* Feeling

The episode starts with a review of Molly and Liza's experience labeling emotions over the last week. Liza shares a journaling strategy for observing emotions in order to design a more fulfilling life, and Molly explains how taking the time to check in with herself during a busy work day made her more effective. We then review the first step in coping with unwanted emotions: breaking them down into component parts. We hone in on the feeling of shame, as many individuals who struggle with emotion regulation are also highly shame-prone. We explore how feelings like shame and anger are related through a discussion of primary vs. secondary emotions, and how this distinction can help you identify how you're *really* feeling. We also describe how noticing anger as a secondary emotion to shame is particularly useful for understanding the concept of "white fragility," and we will continue to review skills to combat white fragility in the coming weeks. We switch it up this week by ending with a nerdy DBT emotion regulation mythbusters game. Enjoy!

Jul 27, 202054:47
6. How To: Understand and Name Emotions

6. How To: Understand and Name Emotions

In this episode, Molly and Liza wrap up their teaching of mindfulness skills with homework review and then introduce the next set of skills: Emotion Regulation. Molly was proud to report that she followed up on her coaching from Episode 4, in which she consulted Wise Mind when anger showed up and responded assertively. After making a quick plug for practicing DBT skills (particularly Wise Mind) because of the feeling of mastery that comes with it, Molly and Liza get into the topic of the week: how to understand and name emotions. Using one too many car examples, we explain the importance of accurately labeling emotions as the first step to regulating them. We describe the different components of an emotion including physiological sensations, thoughts and interpretations, and behavioral urges. Lastly, Molly coaches Liza on how to cope with rumination after receiving negative feedback. We hope you enjoy!

Jul 20, 202057:05
5. Listener Questions: DBT, Mindfulness, and Dialectics with Madison Perry

5. Listener Questions: DBT, Mindfulness, and Dialectics with Madison Perry

The Therapists in the Wild are joined by their close friend and colleague, Madison Perry, to answer your listener questions! Madison is a very talented child and family therapist with experience offering adherent DBT to youth and families. We are thrilled to have her, as she brings a unique perspective given her experience providing DBT to the larger family system. In this episode, we all weigh in on listener questions regarding why therapists share personal examples in DBT, whether we should aspire to be mindful all the time, how to apply mindfulness skills to a variety of day-to-day issues, and what to do when you’re practicing dialectical thinking in an interpersonal conflict and the other person is not. We discuss the distinction between rumination/worry vs. reminiscing/problem solving, and Molly shares a West Wing quote to explain how therapists can use their personal experiences to help clients (and now has homework to actually watch West Wing :). We hope you enjoy!

Jul 13, 202052:55
4. How To: Consult Wise Mind to Act Effectively

4. How To: Consult Wise Mind to Act Effectively

This episode, we start by reviewing how to have a Nonjudgmental stance. Liza shares a "fire-y" example, and Molly tries to channel her dogs by adopting a "beginner's mind." Then, we get into the skill of the week: consulting Wise Mind to act Effectively. We teach you to be the captain of your own ship, to make decisions taking into account both your goals and the context you're in. We describe the differences between Emotion Mind, Reasonable Mind, and Wise Mind, and then show you how to get into Wise Mind with an impromptu mindfulness exercise. Finally, Liza coaches Molly on using her Wise Mind to act Effectively when anger shows up. We hope you enjoy! Please share your feedback and questions with us at therapistsinthewild@gmail.com. Stay skillful!

Jun 29, 202049:42
3. How To: Get Rid of "Shoulds" By Acting Nonjudgmentally

3. How To: Get Rid of "Shoulds" By Acting Nonjudgmentally

Liza and Molly begin the episode by reviewing their practice of the fundamental DBT mindfulness "What" skills: Observe, Describe, and Participate. Molly reflects on the importance of using these skills to notice and name uncomfortable emotions, and Liza warns listeners about the dangers of significant others using DBT skills against you ;) We then teach the skill of the week: Nonjudgmentally. We know it's hard to avoid judgments about being nonjudgmental (we had them too!) so we address many of the common concerns and misconceptions about this skill. Judgments (about yourself or others) negatively impact relationships, emotions, and problem solving, so we provide steps to re-frame inevitable judgments using the core Observe and Describe mindfulness skills we reviewed last week. Finally, Molly provides coaching on a very timely situation that Liza is having lots of judgments about. We encourage you to practice the skill of acting nonjudgmentally alongside us, and share your experiences with us at therapistsinthewild@gmail.com. Stay skillful! 

Jun 22, 202047:23
2. How To: Be Here Now By Observing, Describing, and Participating

2. How To: Be Here Now By Observing, Describing, and Participating

In this episode, we discuss our experience practicing dialectical thinking (hint: it wasn't as simple as it sounded last week!). We laughed about our past judgments about mindfulness and discussed what we've since learned about its practical applicability in everyday life.  We then teach the skills of the week: Observe, Describe and Participate. Finally, Liza coaches Molly to apply each of these skills to stay present in conversations when feeling "fried" after a long day. As always, we encourage you to practice these skills alongside us and share your experiences with us at therapistsinthewild@gmail.com. We hope you enjoy!

Jun 11, 202051:37
1. How To: Get Unstuck Using Dialectical Thinking

1. How To: Get Unstuck Using Dialectical Thinking

In this episode, we introduce you to co-hosts Molly and Liza, Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), and the concept of dialectical thinking. We discuss how dialectics can help you get unstuck in intra or interpersonal struggles. We also talk about Sweetgreen's dialectical approach to innovating during COVID-19. Finally, Molly coaches Liza to apply dialectical thinking to wedding planning in the midst of a global pandemic.  

May 27, 202054:60