REAL Talk with Ophelia
By V. Ophelia Rigault
REAL Talk with Ophelia is a solo podcast series hosted by TV Host, Speaker, Grief Transformative Educator and Sassy Trinidadian-Canadian V. Ophelia Rigault. REAL is an acronym for (Resiliency, Equity & Authentic Leadership). Ophelia speaks directly to the transformative power of grief and its intersectionality with race, gender, culture, spirituality and how it is presented in the everyday. These conversations are bite-sized snippets and are about 5 in length.
Episode 19: The Real Meaning Behind the TikTok Trend Drink Water and Mind Your Business
I grew up with my mother telling me when I would get involved in "adult conversations" to "mind my business". I knew instantly that I was overstepping into an area that did not concern me. Drink Water and Mind Your Business is a song about focusing your energy on yourself rather than being overly involved in other people's lives. In this episode, I break down the spiritual and physical meaning of this song. To learn more about my services visit my website at www.vopheliarigault.com
May 05, 2022
Episode 18: Self Care as a Radical Act of Protest
Self-care can be such a buzzword these days - and sometimes gets confused with self-soothing. In 1988, the words of the African-American lesbian writer Audre Lorde became a rallying cry: “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” Self-care is necessary in order for us to deal with a world that hates us because of our race, gender, religion or cultural affiliation. To stay in touch with me visit my website at www.vopheliarigault.com Peace love and light, Ophelia
March 16, 2022
Episode 17: Grief is More than Five Stages - It is also about Continuing Bonds
Today, we’re taking looking at how Grief is More than Five Stages - it is also about Continuing Bonds Let's dive in. The five stages of grief are ingrained in our cultural consciousness as the natural progression of emotions one experiences after the death of a loved one. However, it turns out the model does not describe most people's experiences, and was never even meant to apply to the bereaved. If you enjoyed this episode and you’d like to help support the podcast, please share it with others, post about it on social media, or leave a rating and review. To catch all the latest from me, you can follow me on LinkedIn, Instagram and Facebook at @opheliarigault.
January 28, 2022
Episode 16: Ten Ways to Support Children Through Grief
A child may go from crying one minute to playing the next. It's essential to be developmentally appropriate when supporting them. Throughout the pandemic, millions of children are experiencing grief due to the death of a loved one from COVID-19. Children are also grieving vicariously from watching their parents experience loss of their businesses, careers, financial security, mental health decline, and generally a sense of normalcy and consistency. There is also a sense of collective grief that is felt globally, and children feel all of this, even if they do not express it outwardly.
January 13, 2022
Episode 15: The Meaning of Sidney Poitier
Sidney Poitier, Oscar-winning actor and Hollywood's first Black movie star, dies at 94. When I heard this news, instant memories of watching Sidney Poitier's movies with my mother came rushing back. I remembered her speaking of him with awe and admiration. In this episode, I reflect on the "Meaning of Sidney Poitier" in my life as a Black woman. Learn more about his life at: https://www.cnn.com/2022/01/07/entertainment/sidney-poitier-death/index.html
January 09, 2022
Episode 14: The Transformative Power Grief
“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” Revelation 21:4 The above verse has been what has helped me to heal my deep grief. There were many days that I was pissed at my God, but I had a deep-rooted belief that my mother’s grief had to have meaning. If in life she meant so much to me – then in death, I needed to figure out that meaning as well.
December 31, 2021
Episode 13: What is REAL Talk
In this episode, I discuss what is REAL Talk and the purpose behind the podcast.
September 23, 2021
Episode 12: Grief of Disappointment
The word disappointment originates from the Old French word désappointer which means “to deprive of an office or position.” In relationships, when we feel disappointed in a person - we are feeling we have been deprived of the potential (the hope) we had in them and for them. This is the grief of disappointment. We had hope in that person, and they did not live up to our idea of who they should/can be. Is it about them, or is it about YOU?
July 09, 2021
Episode 11: Stop Silver-lining It
I have no problem with you seeing the bright sides of things, or being optimistic or having a positive personality. I am a very positive person. However, when we don't let others sit with their pain, share their pain - and rush to put a fancy bow on their pain - we are 'SILVER-LINING IT". We do this for a variety of reasons. When we insist on finding the silver lining to a deep sorrow in someone, we are actually robbing ourselves and of the opportunity to build connection and empathy - instead, we build disconnection and distrust. “Empathy is seeing with the eyes of another, listening with the ears of another and feeling with the heart of another.” – Alfred Adler. “You can only understand people if you feel them in yourself.” – John Steinbeck. “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” – Mother Teresa.
July 02, 2021
Episode 10: Unspeakable Grief - How to Provide Support
It’s not about saying the right things. It’s about doing the right things. All loss is tragic however, there are some that are horrific, sudden and unnecessary. For example: The murder of a family member. The genocide of a community. Natural Disasters such as earthquakes, hurricanes, plane crashes, and building collapses. The World is shocked. We ask ourselves "How does this happen?" We are overwhelmed by the graphic nature presented to us on the news. Then all of a sudden we pull away - and go back to our world - because to think of it - to sit in it - makes us feel vulnerable. Grief is heavy - and it needs to be witnessed not fixed.
June 25, 2021
It's More Than Time to Move Beyond Thoughts & Prayers
As Martin Luther King, Jr. reminded us more than 50 years ago, “a riot is the language of the unheard.” Reports of hate crimes are surging in Canada during the COVID-19 pandemic and are on the rise in Muslim, Asian and Jewish communities. Indigenous Communities are dealing with another deep wound of finding over 335 murdered children. Black and Indigenous people are disproportionately amongst the victims of police deadly shootings than White People. We view these stories on social media and the news - we are shocked - we are disgusted - we can't believe it - we become uncomfortable - and then what do we do? We send our thoughts and prayers and get on with our day. It's time to do more.
June 18, 2021
Your Head Wrap Makes You Look Old
She tried to embarrass me for wearing my headwrap. I had a choice to make. Should I believe her words or believe my truth.
June 18, 2021
The Problem is You
Yes, you. The problem in supporting a griever is most times, those who are providing the support. You tell people "it's time to get over it" and you say things like "they wouldn't want to see you crying so much". Most times, the problem isn't that people in grief are too much or they feel too much the problem is that grief makes you uncomfortable. It brings up feelings of vulnerability and fears and it may even remind you of your own grief and the people that you are missing. This episode will give you some tips and how you can support a griever with compassion, patience, understanding and love.
May 28, 2021
Stop Gaslighting People
Gaslighting is a type of emotional manipulation where one person manipulates another person into questioning or doubting their own reality. Gaslighting occurs in the workplace, in relationships and even occurs when someone is grieving. It's when people say: “Calm down, it did not happen that way.” “Stop being so sensitive or You are overreacting.” “You’re turning this into a bigger deal than it is.” All of these are examples of gaslighting statements. The speaker is intentionally or unintentionally undermining your confidence, which makes you question your perception of reality. Gaslighting is destructive and it is a type of emotional manipulation that is based on power and control.
May 22, 2021
Vicarious Grief - Yes It's Real
Vicarious grief refers to grieving and experiencing pain and loss that is stimulated by someone else's loss. It is generated by another individual's loss who is the actual griever, but you are also "feeling" the pain "vicariously". It's real and it's normal.
May 15, 2021
Mother's Day is Not Always a Happy Feeling
Not everyone is having a 'Hallmark Card' moment on mother's day. It can be challenging for many. Some are missing their mothers this Mother's day due to death, illness and/or distance. Some children did not have a positive experience with their mother so is rough. And then there are those who are celebrating having a good mother. No matter where you fall on the spectrum - no you are loved. Blessings, Ophelia www.vopheiarigaut.com
May 09, 2021
Racism is a Deep Soul Grief
Dealing with the reality of racism is not easy. It is profound. It's a profound hatred by society for those who are Black, Indigounes and other People of Colour. In this snippet episode, I talk about the soul grief of racism and how it tries to make you believe you are not worthy of being your great self.
May 08, 2021
Introduction to TGIF Podcast Series
Thank The Grief It's Friday" is a solo-podcast series hosted by TV Host, Speaker, Grief Educator and Sassy Trinidadian-Canadian V. Ophelia Rigault. Ophelia speaks directly to topics of race, mental health, belonging, and other uncomfortable topics in short snippets 5 - 15 minute episodes. It will be a space on Friday nights where you can explore how grief and loss have impacted and transformed your life. As we come to the end of the week, our regular routines come to a close – and we are left with a void – a quiet time on Friday night, where grief becomes that uninvited dinner guest. We will have an open and brave conversation on what grief recovery and healing "really" looks like and how you can find ways to move through grief and loss and how to transforms your pain into purpose. Starting May 7 - Each episode with drop at 11.30 PM EST.
May 01, 2021