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Human Up

Human Up

By Victor Ung

An emotionally-stunted dude's exploration of what it means to be emotionally intelligent. Raised between Asian and American culture, and in the tech world, where mental and emotional health was not prioritized enough, this nerd aims to demystify what it means to not only be a man, but a human. As society progresses faster than humans were meant to keep up with, how do we adapt to an ever-changing world while strengthening our brittle emotions for resiliency? Follow Human Up on Instagram: instagram.com/humanuppodcast.
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Create Confidence Through Emotional Awareness with Seibo Shen

Human UpJul 29, 2019

00:00
01:05:59
[Unreleased 2018 Recording] Two Men Reflecting On What Self-Love Means

[Unreleased 2018 Recording] Two Men Reflecting On What Self-Love Means

Before I finally started this podcast at the beginning of 2019, I was having deep conversations with friends about many of the topics I explore now, but was overthinking getting started with this podcast. I went through my archives and found this early recording 6 months before officially launching this podcast and thought it would be a great share for someone out there contemplating the same things I was 2 years ago.

We talked about:

  • 9:51 Asking mentors the right questions
  • 12:25 Beating ourselves up for lack of progress
  • 14:05 Balancing humility vs celebrating wins
  • 15:37 The privileged mind is susceptible to over-analysis
  • 19:27 Contemplating vulnerability
  • 22:48 Emotional Intelligence is learning how to healthily redirect negative energy
  • 28:35 Finding that one thing that's bigger than ourselves
  • 29:27 Comparing ourselves on social media makes it hard to love ourselves
  • 32:48 The Internet is providing us an abundance mindset

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Follow the Instagram page for this podcast: http://instagram.com/humanuppodcast.

If you get value out of this podcast, consider supporting me to keep this show going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotional Gym and Community for Asian men: https://victorung.com/membership.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

Register for the free EQ and cannabis wellness workshops I’m hosting every other Wednesday! It’s part smoke sesh, part life coaching: https://bit.ly/cannaconnections, or join the Facebook community: http://facebook.com/groups/cannaconnections.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Aug 10, 202037:43
How To Create The Life You Want From The Inside Out

How To Create The Life You Want From The Inside Out

In this episode, I take a break from the amazing guests I’ve had on the show recently to check-in with where I’m at with this podcast and my coaching practice. And I share some ways to identify why you might be feeling stuck right now and what you can do about it.
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Follow the Instagram page for this podcast:
instagram.com/humanuppodcast.
If you get value out of this podcast, consider supporting me to keep this show going: bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.
Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotional Gym and Community for Asian men: victorung.com/membership.
Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: victorung.com/eqtraining.
Register for the free EQ and cannabis wellness workshops I’m hosting every other Wednesday! It’s part smoke sesh, part life coaching: https://bit.ly/cannaconnections, or join the Facebook community: facebook.com/groups/cannaconnections.
Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.
If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: medium.com/@victorung.
Aug 03, 202029:03
How Asian Men Can Become A Great Guy To Date Through Emotional Intelligence (w/ Rob Wang)

How Asian Men Can Become A Great Guy To Date Through Emotional Intelligence (w/ Rob Wang)

In this episode, I spoke with dating coach for Asian men, Rob Wang. We go into the deeper aspects of what creates genuine attraction as an Asian man and how you can develop confidence in not just your dating life, but life in general.

We talked about:

  • Rob burned out from corporate and spiraled into depression
  • Dating doesn't have to be complicated
  • Dating doesn't mean leaving behind your true self, your authentic self
  • Attraction comes from the emotional authenticity within
  • What Rob's current work is for himself in dating and relationships
  • Understanding your emotions also means understanding your body
  • Attraction is an emotion and requires awareness
  • Express emotions with "I feel" rather than "I feel like"
  • Being the "Nice guy" vs the "Kind guy"
  • This inner work is not about "fixing" yourself, but embracing yourself
  • Confidence comes from giving yourself permission to have

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Connect With Rob:

Books mentioned

  • The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the      Healing of Trauma - https://amzn.to/302jWIX
  • No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan for Getting What      You Want in Love, Sex, and Life - https://amzn.to/3g3fiQd

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Follow the Instagram page for this podcast: http://instagram.com/humanuppodcast.

If you get value out of this podcast, consider supporting me to keep this show going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotional Gym and Community for Asian men: https://victorung.com/membership.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

Register for the free EQ and cannabis wellness workshops I’m hosting every other Wednesday! It’s part smoke sesh, part life coaching: https://bit.ly/cannaconnections, or join the Facebook community: http://facebook.com/groups/cannaconnections.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Jul 27, 202001:03:17
Combining Physical Education With Emotional Development (w/ Justin Tsui)

Combining Physical Education With Emotional Development (w/ Justin Tsui)

In this episode, I spoke with sports and success mindset coach, Justin Tsui. After coaching for 15 years and teaching for 20 years in physical education, he now wants to create a deeper impact in education as a whole from outside the school system. He’s now working with students and athletes in helping them answer the question for themselves, “What is it that you really want? How do you actually want to spend your time?”

We talked about:

  • How a trip to the hospital changed his life
  • Thought he was focused on what I want, but was really playing by other people's rules instead
  • Developing the emotional muscles through self-awareness
  • Combining physical alpha mentality with emotional frameworks
  • Emotional Intelligence can't be taught, it has to be experienced
  • Emotional Intelligence is learning to trust yourself
  • The winners in life make decisions quickly

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Connect With Justin:

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Register for the complimentary EQ and cannabis wellness workshops I’m hosting every other Saturday! It’s part smoke sesh, part life coaching: https://bit.ly/cannaconnections.

Follow the Instagram page for this podcast: http://instagram.com/humanuppodcast.

If you get value out of this podcast, consider supporting me to keep this show going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotional Gym and Community for Asian men: https://victorung.com/membership.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Jul 20, 202001:15:03
PTSD Recovery With The Cannabis Coach (w/ Bradley King)

PTSD Recovery With The Cannabis Coach (w/ Bradley King)

In this episode, I discuss mental health, PTSD, alcohol abuse, and cannabis with The Cannabis Coach, Bradley King. He’s a Certified Life Coach for over 6 years helping people achieve a new way of life. After being sexually abused and spiraling into alcohol and drug abuse, Bradley found the support he needed through 12-step recovery and life coaching. He also learned to properly use cannabis with meditation to help him cope with anxiety and PTSD and is now thriving with his husband and son. Currently, he’s helping others work through their own obstacles through life coaching, cannabis coaching, and public speaking while breaking the stigma of the “stupid stoner.”

We talked about:

  • Bradley's recovery from alcohol abuse and PTSD
  • Learning to properly consume cannabis to cope
  • Seeking emotional support from others
  • How combining cannabis with mindfulness helped reduce need for prescription pills

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Connect With Bradley:

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Register for the free cannabis wellness education workshops I’m hosting every other Saturday! It’s part smoke sesh, part life coaching: https://bit.ly/cannaconnections.

If you get value out of this podcast, consider supporting me to keep this show going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotional Gym and Community for Asian men: https://victorung.com/membership.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Jul 13, 202001:13:25
An Uncomfortable Awakening With Self-Care And Cannabis (w/ Sarah Gardner)

An Uncomfortable Awakening With Self-Care And Cannabis (w/ Sarah Gardner)

In this episode, I have on as my guest, Sarah Gardner, Membership Director at Hemp Industries Association. She shares her struggle with anxiety, an eating disorder, and being miserable in her work, and how that manifested in her relationships. After a certain point, she realized she was the common denominator that was avoiding facing her demons and decided to make some internal changes.

We talked about:

  • How to find the right CBD product
  • How cannabis helped Sarah breathe through pressure
  • How Sarah was miserable selling technology
  • Her uncomfortable awakening to self-care
  • The opposing forces to cannabis education and legalization
  • The many health impacts of the Endocannabinoid System
  • The future for high THC cannabis and hemp
  • What consumers can do to support the hemp industry

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Connect With Sarah:

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If you get value out of this podcast, please support me in maintaining the fees to keep this going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotional Gym men’s minds and hearts: https://victorung.com/membership.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Jul 06, 202001:07:42
Mental Health, CBD, & Addiction (w/ Dr. Vincent Ramos)
Jun 29, 202059:53
The Intersection Of Cannabis And Mindfulness (w/ Heather Dagley)
Jun 22, 202001:03:14
The Emotional Intelligence Benefits From Ganja Yoga (w/ Erin Allan)

The Emotional Intelligence Benefits From Ganja Yoga (w/ Erin Allan)

I found Erin Allan when searching for ganja yoga classes in Seattle. And boy was I stoked. If you’ve been following this podcast, you’ll know that I’ve been on an emotional health and spiritual journey the past two years, if not all my life. And cannabis and yoga, separately, has been a huge tool in helping me through it.

Erin calls herself a reformed marriage and family therapist after 10 years in the counselling field. In her desire to help however, she found herself burning out, became overweight and depressed, and taking many medications to reduce the physical and emotional pain.

At her low point, she decided to try cannabis, which became legal in the state of California, with the intention to escape. Instead, cannabis helped her drop right into the core of what she was feeling and everything became clear to her.

Now she runs HR for a local dispensary and teaches ganja yoga at Kula Movement in the Ballard neighborhood in Seattle, WA.

We talked about:

  • Her journey from a mental health professional to a budtender to a ganja yoga teacher
  • How cannabis helped with her depression, anxiety, pain, and emotional eating
  • How her transformation was possible through the combination of treating cannabis with high regard and utilizing wellness practices together

**Disclaimer** Cannabis can be used to enable better mental health, but it does not replace formal therapy for serious medical conditions. If you are experiencing disabling thoughts, emotions, or behaviors, please seek professional help. The wellness applications of cannabis are still being researched. Please proceed consciously.

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Resources:

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If you get value out of this podcast, please support me in maintaining the fees to keep this going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotion Gym for Asian Men’s minds and hearts: https://victorung.com/emotiongymmembership.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Jun 15, 202001:11:02
Processing These Times On A Roadtrip Across the US

Processing These Times On A Roadtrip Across the US

I went on a roadtrip this last week, all during a lockdown because of a global pandemic, as well as violent riots happening around the world because of yet another cold-blooded murder of an innocent black man by a white cop and other complicit cops of color. Seeing this brings up so many emotions from all different sides. And unfortunately, regardless of what side you’re on, those who can’t manage those emotions, even from a place of good intentions, end up behaving in very unproductive, unhealthy, even dangerous ways.

I missed releasing an episode last week because I was on this road trip, but also because I needed time to really process all of this for myself. I still am. And I’m starting to develop my voice around it, without having any expectations of saying the “right” thing, or what I’m supposed to say. Just expressing the truth in what we feel for ourselves right now, which could be good things, positive things, seemingly irrelevant things. You might think your feelings are alone, but that doesn’t make it less real or important, or that it doesn’t deserve an outlet either.

My outlet is to hop on here and let out a string of thoughts.

Let me know what this episode brings up for you and record it for me to use in a future episode! http://anchor.fm/victorung/message. Or send a voice message on IG: http://instagram.com/humanuppodcast.

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If you get value out of this podcast, please support me in maintaining the fees to keep this going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotion Gym for Asian Men’s minds and hearts: https://victorung.com/emotiongymmembership.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Jun 08, 202033:14
How To Deal With Asian Parents (ft. Katharine Chan)

How To Deal With Asian Parents (ft. Katharine Chan)

In this episode, I talk to author, Katharine Chan about her new book, “How To Deal With Asian Parents.” I related to her stories about her parents (along with her research of the many other stories online) who were mostly unknowingly draining her mental and emotional health. Through the generational trauma, cultural gaps, and language barriers, it’s difficult for Asian parents and their children to properly communicate and really address the deeper emotions behind their words, which eventually takes a toll on the children’s wellbeing. If you struggle developing a relationship with your Asian parents, or want to be mindful about becoming a parent, this book and episode is for you.

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Resources:

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If you get value out of this podcast, please support me in maintaining the fees to keep the show and stories going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Get on the waitlist for the Virtual Emotion Gym for Asian Men’s minds and hearts: https://victorung.com/emotiongymmembership.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes, say I sent you! http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

May 25, 202001:15:41
How Cannabis Affects Asian American Culture And Personal Health (ft/ Amanda Tran)

How Cannabis Affects Asian American Culture And Personal Health (ft/ Amanda Tran)

In this episode, I talk with Amanda Tran after finding an interview she had with the Asian Americans for Cannabis Education. I became curious about her work with MedMen and in the operations side of the cannabis industry. And resonated with her mission for social justice and mental health with cannabis as an Asian American woman.

**Disclaimer: Cannabis can be used to improve wellbeing in some consumers, but it does NOT replace formal therapy for serious medical conditions. I am not a medical professional. If you are experiencing disabling thoughts, emotions, or behaviors, please seek professional help. The wellness applications of cannabis are still being researched. Please proceed consciously.**

We talked about:

  • How Amanda used cannabis to manage her stress and burnout
  • Weed is like many things, it can be used for both good and bad
  • “Weed is like therapy, you can have a bad therapist that might ruin what you think about therapy, but there are many different styles of therapy.”
  • There’s a lot of social justice to be had with cannabis
  • How cannabis affects culture at large, and within Asian American communities
  • How cannabis unblocks creativity by letting go of perfection

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Resources:

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If you get value out of this podcast, please support me in maintaining the fees to keep this going: https://bit.ly/humanuppodcastdonation.

Join the Flowmasters Tribe: https://www.facebook.com/groups/flowmasterstribe.

Connect with other Badass Asian Dudes: http://facebook.com/groups/badassasiandudes.

Get access to a free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 Training at: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

May 18, 202001:22:39
Empowering People Of Color With Mental Health (w/ Kriselle Gabriel)
May 11, 202001:18:10
Why Emotional Intelligence Is A Requirement For Living Your Own Life (w/ Mike Tuon)
May 04, 202001:11:21
A Candid Chat On Asian Mental Health (w/ Iran Thongdy)
Apr 27, 202040:42
Entrepreneurship Is The Best Personal Development Course (w/ Brandon Stover)
Apr 20, 202001:01:52
Limiting Emotions Limits Potential (w/ Matthew Nadu)
Apr 13, 202001:05:10
Walking Inside Ourselves With Emotional Intelligence (w/Anne Beaulieu)
Apr 06, 202001:07:05
The Human Up Podcast Is Back!

The Human Up Podcast Is Back!

I'm excited to be back! 

After a few months of a break for me to zoom out and look at what I really want out of this podcast, the Human Up brand, and life overall, I realized that I love this podcast and podcasting in general. And I want to continue using this space to have the deeper, more long-form conversations where I get to nerd out with other emotional intelligence experts, mindset coaches, business/execute coaches, speakers, writers, and wait for it... cannabis educators! 

If you've been following this podcast, you'll know I left the tech industry after burning out and hitting a quarter-life crisis, which led me into an exploration of myself and my own emotional intelligence. During it, I was using cannabis recreationally (legal in the state of Washington), and at the time, I thought it was for fun, but looking back, it was what got me through being lost and overwhelmed, healing me emotionally and spiritually. So I do see a huge connection between emotional intelligence and cannabis as tools to help us live better lives!

Join me every Monday morning as I talk to some cool people to pull out the emotional side of their stories so you can get the insight you need to prevent your own life crisis.

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Get access to the free 90-min Emotional Intelligence 101 training here: http://victorung.com/eqtraining.

Join the Facebook Group for weekly livestreams and to connect with other like-minded EQ nerds: https://www.facebook.com/groups/humanup.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Mar 30, 202008:50
It’s Time I Take A Break (Season 1 wrap up)

It’s Time I Take A Break (Season 1 wrap up)

If you’ve been listening to this podcast, first, thank you! I appreciate your loyal listenership and for caring about emotional intelligence. I hope it’s been valuable to you, if it has, I need that ego boost and would love to hear from you!
But this is my official wrap up announcement of Season 1 of the Human Up podcast as I take time for myself to dive even deeper into myself, why I’m doing this, and how I could help. I'll continue creating content on my Youtube channel here:
victorung.com/youtube.
Thank you again for listening and I hope to catch you again in Season 2!
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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and join my Facebook Group at! victorung.com/subscribe.
Help me write the book for those 11 exercises by taking this 2-question survey: victorung.com/book.
Join the waitlist for the video course and group coaching program to learn how to regulate our emotions and use them for personal clarity: victorung.com/groupcoaching.
Join the Facebook Group with other like-minded EQ nerds: www.facebook.com/groups/humanup.
If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: medium.com/@victorung.
If you want to be on the podcast, visit: victorung.com/podcast.
Jan 06, 202011:10
Some Qualities Of An Emotionally Intelligent Partner

Some Qualities Of An Emotionally Intelligent Partner

In this episode, I read my blog post, 11 Qualities To Look For In An Emotionally Intelligent Partner.

I’m not one to tell you who you should date or what you should value in a partner. No one can. You have to find what it is you care about, both within yourself and with a partner.

But as I’ve observed, myself, others, and our relationships throughout my life, these are the qualities I find that people gravitate towards.

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and join my Facebook Group at! http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Help me write the book for those 11 exercises by taking this 2-question survey: http://victorung.com/book.

Join the waitlist for the video course and group coaching program to learn how to regulate our emotions and use them for personal clarity: http://victorung.com/groupcoaching.

Join the Facebook Group with other like-minded EQ nerds: https://www.facebook.com/groups/humanup.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Dec 16, 201918:25
Exercising Social-Emotional Learning Personally And Professionally (with Di Zhen Ye) - Part 2/2

Exercising Social-Emotional Learning Personally And Professionally (with Di Zhen Ye) - Part 2/2

This week, I geek out with Di Ye, Career and Leadership Coach, Trainer, and Founder of Zhennovate about emotional intelligence, leadership coaching, and continual transformation.  After a few years realizing how her lack of confidence was holding her back from expressing her innovative ideas, she worked with her own coach to break out from her own limiting beliefs and took full responsibility of her own life.

There’s a lot of coaching concepts and constructive interpersonal skills being taught in this one!

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In this second part of a 2-part series, we talk about:

  • Developing psychological safety to build trust with one another
  • Her experience and relationships with the 5 Core Emotions

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Resources:

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and join my Facebook Group at! http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Help me write the book for those 11 exercises by taking this 2-question survey: http://victorung.com/book.

Join the waitlist for the video course and group coaching program to learn how to regulate our emotions and use them for personal clarity: http://victorung.com/groupcoaching.

Join the Facebook Group with other like-minded EQ nerds: https://www.facebook.com/groups/humanup.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Dec 09, 201939:24
Exercising Social-Emotional Learning Personally And Professionally (with Di Zhen Ye) - Part 1/2

Exercising Social-Emotional Learning Personally And Professionally (with Di Zhen Ye) - Part 1/2

This week, I geek out with Di Ye, Career and Leadership Coach, Trainer, and Founder of Zhennovate about emotional intelligence, leadership coaching, and continual transformation.  After a few years realizing how her lack of confidence was holding her back from expressing her innovative ideas, she worked with her own coach to break out from her own limiting beliefs and took full responsibility of her own life.

There’s a lot of coaching concepts and constructive interpersonal skills being taught in this one!

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In this first part of a 2-part series, we talk about:

  • Social-emotional intelligence is about shifting a negative emotion into something more constructive
  • Democratizing premium personal and professional coaching for lower levels
  • How coaching empowered her confidence
  • Transformation has no end, it's a lifestyle
  • Acknowledging progress is how transformation is sustained
  • How to increase self-awareness without a coach

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Resources:

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and join my Facebook Group at! http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Help me write the book for those 11 exercises by taking this 2-question survey: http://victorung.com/book.

Join the waitlist for the video course and group coaching program to learn how to regulate our emotions and use them for personal clarity: http://victorung.com/groupcoaching.

Join the Facebook Group with other like-minded EQ nerds: https://www.facebook.com/groups/humanup.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Dec 09, 201943:27
How To Create Your Purpose With Ikigai
Dec 02, 201918:25
Staying ‘Stuck’ Is A Habit (With Joanne Victoria)

Staying ‘Stuck’ Is A Habit (With Joanne Victoria)

I’m guilty of making decisions with a bias towards comfort. But when we prioritize the safety over everything else, it eventually leads to stagnation and apathy towards life.
On this episode, I talk with life coach, author, speaker, and host of The San It Project podcast about her travels through life and the many transitions she’s made to get to where she is today.
We talk about how being stuck in our lives is not because of our circumstances, it stems from the negative thought habits that keeps us in place. With just a slight shift in thinking, we can start to envision and design our lives for the better.
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In this episode, we talk about:

Joanne's story of many transitions

Is emotional resilience given or built?

How to choose your own values

Designing your life vs learning as you go

How to push through failure

Fulfillment lives outside safety

Standing up for yourself comes from within

Joanne's experience with the 5 core emotions

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Resources:

Learn more about Joanne Victoria’s coaching services and podcast at:
askjoannevictoria.com

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and join my Facebook Group at! victorung.com/subscribe.
Help me write the book for those 11 exercises by taking this 2-question survey: victorung.com/book.
Join the waitlist for the video course and group coaching program to learn how to regulate our emotions and use them for personal clarity: victorung.com/groupcoaching.
Join the Facebook Group with other like-minded EQ nerds: www.facebook.com/groups/humanup.
If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: medium.com/@victorung.
If you want to be on the podcast, visit: victorung.com/podcast.
Nov 25, 201959:48
Embracing Fear of Failure With Emotional Intelligence (with Danylo Kurgan)

Embracing Fear of Failure With Emotional Intelligence (with Danylo Kurgan)

Entrepreneurship requires a lot of emotional intelligence. Not only in being able to empathize and connect with your customers, but to push through the many internal emotions that come up in taking such large physical and emotional risks in putting yourself out there.

One emotion is the fear of failure, which needs to be embraced as a possibility if we were to move forward. Rather than debilitating ourselves in that fear, how we can stand up to it, be aware of it when it’s happening, and learn to respond to it productively instead?

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In this episode, we talk about how:

  • Danylo's love for entrepreneurship
  • Failure is a necessary part of entrepreneurship
  • How to deal with failure
  • How culture affects personal freedom of expression
  • Emotional intelligence is about the small things
  • The importance of owning your weaknesses and honesty on what you don't know
  • Emotional Intelligence will be an important skill in the future
  • Danlyo's experiences with the 5 core emotions

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Resources:

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and join my Facebook Group at! http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Help me write the book for those 11 exercises by taking this 2-question survey: http://victorung.com/book.

Join the waitlist for the video course and group coaching program to learn how to regulate our emotions and use them for personal clarity: http://victorung.com/groupcoaching.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Nov 18, 201901:03:34
Authenticity, Not Just Positivity

Authenticity, Not Just Positivity

On this journey to improve my own emotional intelligence, I've already been having so many great conversations with friends, family, and even strangers!

One of them shared such an important concept that I share not to force you to take on the belief whole-heartedly, but to ignite some thought and reflection that might help your life.

Live with authenticity, not positivity.

It hits on the idea that a lot of us might be putting up a front, or a mask of positivity, subconsciously or not. We try to keep our heads afloat, hide the negativity, tell people that "I'm doing great!" when in reality, you couldn't fall asleep until 4am last night because you were staring at your ceiling not knowing where your life is going.

Part of why we're feeling this way is because of how far we've strayed from who we are. We hear all of these messages to stay positive, the other side is greener, etc. Don't get me wrong, I still think positivity and optimism is a powerful tool to live a great life, but if it's at the expense of addressing how you're truly feeling, that's when we start losing ourselves.

Read the full piece on Medium!

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast, blog, and videos! http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Help me write the book for those 11 exercises by taking this 2-question survey: http://victorung.com/book.

Join the waitlist for the video course and group coaching program to learn how to regulate our emotions and use them for personal clarity: http://victorung.com/videocourse.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Nov 11, 201917:08
How To Use Travel To Boost Emotional Intelligence (With Sahara Rose)

How To Use Travel To Boost Emotional Intelligence (With Sahara Rose)

If you love traveling, this episode will help you travel with more intention for your personal wellbeing so that the next time you go somewhere, it’s not just an escape where you’ll come back to the same routine and patterns that you left. It’ll be an opportunity to grow.

Travel is a great way to boost emotional intelligence, which consists of self-awareness, emotional management, and empathy. When we force ourselves outside of our traditional environment, it automatically expands our perspectives in who we thought we were when we’re able to connect with those who are living very differently than us.

The issue is when we travel in a disconnected manner. Disconnected from yourself and your intentions, disconnected from the culture and people that you’re visiting, disconnected from the land and environment that have the privilege of walking on.

This is why I’m excited to share this conversation with travel coach, Sahara Rose, who helps people in the workplace travel with more intention in order to maximize the many wellness benefits that come from travel.

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In this episode, we talk about how:

  • How Sahara created her ideal career
  • What is travel coaching?
  • How travel can be a key component in improving our emotional wellbeing
  • How to get past what holds us back from traveling

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Resources:

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast, blog, and my upcoming eBook! http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Join the waitlist for the video course and group coaching program to learn how to regulate our emotions and use them for personal clarity: http://victorung.com/videocourse.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Nov 05, 201901:10:24
Why Should We Care About Emotional Intelligence?

Why Should We Care About Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence is one of the missing skills from our education system. Rarely were we taught how to deal with conflict, how to make good decisions for the long-term, how to manage stress, and how to be comfortable expressing our deeper feelings and what we truly want.

I’ve noticed the lack thereof within my life and how it’s kept me complacent in my career, relationships, and hobbies. Learning about emotional intelligence has created a shift from me passively sitting in the backseat of my life to taking lead and being more assertive with how I want to live.

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Resources:

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Provide me feedback on where you’re at in your EQ journey: http://victorung.com/feedback.

Become a Patron to support this podcast: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Join the waitlist for the group coaching program to learn how to better manage both our technology and our emotions: http://victorung.com/eqtechsurvey.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Oct 28, 201920:05
Strengthening Your Roots With The Neuropsychology Of EQ (with Mieka Briejer)

Strengthening Your Roots With The Neuropsychology Of EQ (with Mieka Briejer)

Emotions are hard to talk about. They’re hard to define. They’re hard to feel. They’re hard to manage.

Learning the neuropsychology behind emotional intelligence provides a framework to help us with all of that. It gives us the ability to better interpret our emotions as data that can help us think more clearly.

And when we better understand our emotions, it strengthens our roots so that we’ll become more resilient and adaptable with change.

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In this episode, we talk about how:

  • Mieka's studies in political science, social impact, body trauma and neuroscience got her here
  • We are expected to be emotionally competent but weren't taught the skills
  • Our emotions serve as an antenna to provide us with more information for decision-making
  • Social and emotional capacity is the missing ingredient at both the societal and human level
  • Emotional resiliency is built by addressing the core needs

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Resources:

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Provide me feedback on where you’re at in your EQ journey: http://victorung.com/feedback.

Join my Facebook Group to connect and learn from the community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/humanup.

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Join the waitlist for the group coaching program to learn how to better manage both our technology and our emotions: http://victorung.com/eqtechsurvey.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

If you want to be on the podcast, visit: http://victorung.com/podcast.

Oct 21, 201901:00:14
The Vulnerability Of Expression Through Fashion and Creativity (with Antonio Smith)

The Vulnerability Of Expression Through Fashion and Creativity (with Antonio Smith)

How do you present yourself through your behaviors, words, and even fashion? Have you held back what is true and feels good to you in any of those three areas? If you have, I completely understand, having been influenced by so many cultural norms and perceptions that put pressure on me to blend in, rather than express myself.

Self-expression comes in many forms and in this episode we hit on what that means coming from the perspective of men in fashion and creativity.

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In this episode, we talk about:

  • How Antonio started Seattle Gents
  • Building community for Seattle men
  • Identifying and sticking to why you're pursuing your creative projects rather than comparing yourself to others
  • Everyone is creative, you just have to train it like a muscle
  • Finding your own groove and style by unapologetically expressing your creativity

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Resources:

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Become a Patron to support this podcast: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Send me a voice message with any thoughts, feedback, praise, takeaways, or stories you want to share with this podcast at http://victorung.com/podcast.

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Join the waitlist for the free group coaching program to learn how to better manage both our technology and our emotions: http://victorung.com/eqtechsurvey.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Oct 14, 201941:05
Why Connecting With Your Emotions Will Connect You With Others (with Steven Kitajima)

Why Connecting With Your Emotions Will Connect You With Others (with Steven Kitajima)

Coming from an Asian immigrant family, raised in America’s masculine culture, emotions and feelings are the last thing we would talk about. But in that suppression we also push away the people around us. It’s why we end up in either stagnant relationships, or feeling lonely that no one can relate to us because we’ve been used to dealing with it on our own.

The first step to curbing this loneliness and connecting with others on a deeper level is to connect back to your own emotions. It’s to become aware of those sensations and situations that make us uncomfortable and to purposefully lean into it. When you can understand your own emotions better, what triggers them, and be confident enough to express them, it gives other people a better understanding of who you are and how to connect with you as well.

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In this episode, we talk about:

  • Why men might struggle talking about emotions because of limited outside structures placed upon us
  • Steven's journey in starting his podcast
  • How it's easier to not connect with other humans because of the convenience of technology, and fear of taking emotional risks
  • Not admitting to and talking about emotions makes it that much easier to become stagnant in your life
  • How to create more connectedness by expressing your emotions

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Resources:

-------------------------------------

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Send me a voice message with any thoughts, feedback, praise, takeaways, or stories you want to share with this podcast at http://victorung.com/podcast.

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Join the waitlist for the free group coaching program to learn how to better manage both our technology and our emotions: http://victorung.com/eqtechsurvey.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Oct 07, 201901:06:12
You Can Live More Than One Life

You Can Live More Than One Life

Subconsciously, we have been trained to stick to one thing and it’s hard to break out of that, or explore a completely new path. You might even be telling yourself things like, “I’ve invested so much time, money, and energy into this already,” “I don’t want to waste all that I’ve learned,” “It’s too late for me to do something completely new and unrelated,” “I’ve come so far, might as well stick it through,” “I’m not a quitter.” That is the sunk costs fallacy.

We think that we only have one life. We think that once we’ve chosen that school, that major, that job, that career, that expertise that that’s what we have to stick with. It’s what we know, it’s what we’re good at.

Let’s challenge that. What if we don’t only live once? What if we can live multiple lives?

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Check out the blog post for this episode here: https://medium.com/the-ascent/you-have-more-than-one-life-9b242c4b84c2?source=---------15------------------

-------------------------------------

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Send me a voice message with any thoughts, feedback, praise, takeaways, or stories you want to share with this podcast at http://victorung.com/podcast.

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Schedule your Discovery Coaching Call with me to personally work on building your own emotional intelligence, resiliency, and clarity for your career, and relationships, as well as productivity with your technology-use: http://victorung.com.

Sep 30, 201914:20
Technology, We Need To Talk

Technology, We Need To Talk

I love you, Technology.

I love the way you provide so much excitement in my life. I love how you do so many things for me, how you make my life so easy and convenient.

But...

I’m worried about who I’ve become with all this time with you. I know, it’s really self-centered for me to say this, but I’ve become too dependent on you.

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Check out the blog post for this episode here: https://psiloveyou.xyz/technology-its-not-you-it-s-me-6c88f4bf5373

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Send me a voice message with any thoughts, feedback, praise, takeaways, or stories you want to share with this podcast at http://victorung.com/podcast.

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Schedule your Discovery Coaching Call with me to personally work on building your own emotional intelligence, resiliency, and clarity for your career, and relationships, as well as productivity with your technology-use: http://victorung.com.

Sep 23, 201917:26
Adulting Like a Revolutionary (with Rachel Alexandria)

Adulting Like a Revolutionary (with Rachel Alexandria)

“Adulting like a revolutionary is taking a self-loving, logical look at where you are fighting the battles that are unwinnable vs looking at where you might be ignoring the battles that you can win.”

Serving eight years as a psychotherapist, who now calls herself a Soul Medic, Rachel Alexandria is helping people “adult like a revolutionary” by helping them explore the rituals that are missing from their transition into adulthood.

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Timestamps:

[6:00] Rachel's background

[7:54] Even adults need support in growth

[15:37] What is "Adulting like a Revolutionary?"

[22:49] The process in living with intentionality

[28:55] The importance of rituals

[32:44] How do you become an adult, separate from your family?

[39:23] Living on purpose vs flowing through necessary phases

[42:49] Learning about your own emotions makes you resilient to change

[45:32] 5 Core Emotions

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Resources:

-------------------------------------

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Send me a voice message with any thoughts, feedback, praise, takeaways, or stories you want to share with this podcast at http://victorung.com/podcast.

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Schedule your Discovery Coaching Call with me to personally work on building your own emotional intelligence, resiliency, and clarity for your career and relationships: http://victorung.com.

If you’re a reader, clap for my writing on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Sep 16, 201901:02:07
Solomon's Paradox: How to Apply Your Own Wisdom
Sep 10, 201914:31
With Great Emotional Intelligence Comes Great Responsibility (with Matt Perelstein)

With Great Emotional Intelligence Comes Great Responsibility (with Matt Perelstein)

We can’t control our emotions, but we can control how we respond to them. That’s the power of emotional intelligence, to be able to better manage what we do with how we feel in the moment in order to be productive rather than destructive. The issue is that so many of us haven’t been provided the education or tools to deal with our own emotions or those of others, which creates a lot of tension in many social issues today.

The process of becoming more emotionally intelligent is simple, but difficult to master:

  1. Awareness
  2. Acceptance
  3. Action (or not)

It starts by slowing down so that you can become aware of your emotions and what it means for you. Then we can embrace how we’re feeling, to acknowledge its presence, so that we can start taking steps to do (or not to do) something with it.

In this episode, my guest Matt Perelstein of EQ4Peace shares his passion for emotional intelligence education as we nerd out about how to use this as a tool to train our emotional muscles for both internal and external peace.

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Timestamps:

[5:53] We were never taught how to train the right-side of our brains

[11:25] The connection between the heart, mind, and body

[13:21] Decisions should be based on both thoughts and feelings

[14:57] How to develop the emotional muscle to better feel and communicate our emotions

[27:09] Emotional education in schools

[31:38] Example exercise to identify emotions

[34:22] How to sustain emotional intelligence

[42:58] We're getting closer to quantify EQ, but it still requires practice

[46:55] 5 Core emotions

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Resources:

http://mattperelstein.com/

http://eq4peace.org/

4,000 feeling words to increase emotional vocabulary: http://eqi.org/fw.htm

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Send me a voice message with anything thoughts, feedback, praise, takeaways, or stories you want to share with this podcast at http://victorung.com/podcast.

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Intelligence exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Schedule a Discovery coaching call with me to personally work on building your emotional resiliency: http://victorung.com.

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Clap for me on my blog on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Sep 02, 201901:01:51
What Emotional Intelligence Means for Men, Business, and Relationships (with Ryan Shirley)

What Emotional Intelligence Means for Men, Business, and Relationships (with Ryan Shirley)

Emotional intelligence doesn’t come natural for many people, no matter the circumstances, but it’s especially missing in a lot of men. I’ve noticed this especially true for myself, where I was unwilling to be uncomfortable feeling my emotions. It made me feel weak, or childish, or “feminine.”

But why is something as natural as our emotions something we try to hide?

I talk to a good friend, Ryan Shirley, co-founder of Pursuit and Tie, about how important of a role EQ plays in business/client service, marriage, and friendships, as well as what it means for men to manage our emotions.

*Due to previous audio setup, there will be occasional background noise in the recording.

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Timestamps:

[7:50] Does a person's value solely come from the ability to product outcomes?

[9:49] Men don't prioritize emotional growth

[12:38] Men's balance with power

[13:43] Yes, you can have too much EQ

[9:38] But lack of EQ creates stale relationships

[17:05] What we practice grows stronger

[19:04] Competition is great to push us forward, but hurts us when we compare self-worth

[20:2] EQ is the muscle needed to work better with others

[21:24] Ryan's advice on resume building

[25:23] EQ is important to make relationships work

[36:16] Men's struggle to swallow pride to fight for relationships

[39:36] The Mt Rushmore of Emotionally Intelligent people

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Resources:

Resume consulting: http://pursuitandtie.com.

-------------------------------------

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Schedule a free coaching call with me to work on your emotional intelligence: http://victorung.com.

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Clap for me on my blog on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Aug 26, 201943:55
Masculinity and the Fear of Emotional Risk ft. Christian Lopez

Masculinity and the Fear of Emotional Risk ft. Christian Lopez

I've grown up being scared of my emotions. I was told they were weak, "girly," so I suppressed them, especially the more heartfelt ones. Anger was OK though, since it was more fierce and powerful, but also dangerous. 

But as we know, all human beings are social, emotional beings at the core. We are meant to feel emotions, whether we like it or not, we'll feel things. And like anything, when you try to silence that voice, there are many consequences that result from that, i.e. shallow relationships, stagnant life, burnout in career, loss in integrity and direction, low self-confidence.

Only when we identify what we're feeling specifically, get to the root cause of the issue, can we start developing the steps and strategies to know what to do with it. But if we leave our emotions clouded in vagueness, it will always feel overwhelming and difficult to deal with.

This is why I love this conversation with former professional MLB player, fellow life coach, and motivational speaker, Christian Lopez about society's limited perspective on what it means to be a man. We talk about his story through manhood and how he's working on not only becoming the best man he could be, but human as well.

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Timestamps:

[6:43] Christian's story

[17:29] Get over fear by having bias towards action

[26:59] How to manage emotions as men in judgmental environments

[45:03] There are many definitions of a man

[49:52] Everyone needs role models

[57:00] How to take emotional risks without getting wounded

[1:11:29] The 5 Core Emotions

[1:21:46] What Christian's up to

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Resources:

Christian's podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/behind-the-mask-ulinity/id1474423662.

Join Christian's FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2523230051072858.

Find a local Toastmasters group to improve your communication skills: https://www.toastmasters.org.

-------------------------------------

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Schedule a free coaching call with me to work on your emotional intelligence: http://victorung.com.

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Clap for me on my blog on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung

Aug 19, 201901:26:06
Embrace Imperfections and Impermanence with Japanese Philosophy Wabi Sabi (with Kendra Lee)

Embrace Imperfections and Impermanence with Japanese Philosophy Wabi Sabi (with Kendra Lee)

I used to be proud of calling myself a ‘perfectionist.’ It was like one of those things I would say in job interviews when they ask, “What is your biggest weakness?” And I would spin it to say that I just have really high standards and love delivering high quality work.

I didn’t realize what other effects perfectionism would have on my personal well-being. The fact that having impossible standards for myself added so much unnecessary weight and stress on me and my work. And how the self-criticism got worse the more I thought I had to be perfect.

I’m excited to share this episode with another recovering perfectionist, Kendra Lee, a writer and self-love coach who embraced the Japanese philosophy of Wabi Sabi to help her find relief and love for herself. We talk about how it’s helped her in her life personally, while finding the intersection of those ideas with the ideas of emotional intelligence.

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Timestamps:

[1:32] Ad

[4:33] Kendra's recovery from perfectionism

[9:04] The 3 Truths to Wabi Sabi

[11:11] Showing up, with all of your cracks and imperfections, is good enough

[16:29] Become deattached from other people's reactions

[26:06] Blending Wabi Sabi with Emotional Intelligence

[31:36] How to learn more about Wabi Sabi

[37:36] Using Wabi Sabi to improve the relationship with ourselves

[43:52] 5 Core Emotions

[50:33] How to find Kendra

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Resources:

Learn more about Kendra and Wabi Sabi: http://wabisabihappylife.com.

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Clap for me on my blog on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Aug 12, 201957:18
What Gets You Excited? (featuring guest stories)

What Gets You Excited? (featuring guest stories)

Excitement is a complicated emotion. When asked this question, many of us don’t know how to answer. And some of us might even avoid answering or to feel it too much out of fear of setting ourselves up for disappointment.

I was definitely a part of both of those groups. Growing up, anytime I did feel excitement towards something, it was usually met with something less than what I was expecting. So I trained myself to not get too excited anymore. But I’ve now realized, that is so limiting! It’s time to find that excitement, be excited, and stay excited! Do what you want to do!

This episode, I asked people to send in audio recordings of what gets them excited, either personally, professionally, or within the world. Here are there stories.

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Timestamps:

[4:51] Laura, excited about a new career path

[8:31] Bob, Metal and Mortgages podcast, on exploring what excitement is

[12:46] Carolina, career coach, how to get back into excitement

[14:17] Christian, life coach and motivational speaker, growth is exciting

[16:17] William, clarity coach, excitement is contagious

[17:19] Steven, Better Men podcast, excited about growing positivity

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Clap for me on my blog on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Aug 05, 201922:08
Create Confidence Through Emotional Awareness with Seibo Shen

Create Confidence Through Emotional Awareness with Seibo Shen

Being raised in two different cultures is both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, I am grateful for the cultural values and traditions that come from my Asian background and to be able to compare and contrast that against American ideals that helped broaden my perspectives. On the other hand, being pulled in two different directions left me confused and stuck in who I wanted to be, which didn’t leave much room to build confidence within me. Do I follow the Asian traditions that have been passed down for generations, like family and sacrifice? Or do I embrace the American culture as an individual being born-and-raised in America and seek out personal passions and self-care? The short answer is that I don’t have to pick one or other, instead, I acknowledge that it’s actually a privilege of mine to be able to balance these two worlds so I can use that to create my own culture, traditions, and values.

I talk about all of this with Seibo Shen, one half of the duo from the Happy Asian Males podcast, where they talk about the traditionally taboo topics in Asian culture, like mental health, sex, drugs, gender roles and sexual identity and I was excited to jump on to do my part in breaking the social barriers we’ve put up that prevented us from having these difficult, but necessary conversations if we want to create a more cohesive society.

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Timestamps:

[6:34] How Human Up met the Happy Asian Males

[7:59] The balance between Asian and American identity

[16:20] Self-actualization as an Asian male

[26:34] The vulnerable process in understanding our own emotions

[36:16] The beauty that comes from openly expressing ourselves

[44:52] We need more safe spaces to learn how to broaden our perspectives

[50:41] Perfection is a chase for external validation that you will never be able to internalize

[55:28] Actionable step: identify your core values

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Resources:

Happy Asian Males podcast: http://www.happyasianmales.com.

Worksheet to understand your core values: https://www.cmu.edu/career/documents/my-career-path-activities/values-exercise.pdf.

-------------------------------------

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Clap for me on my blog on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Jul 29, 201901:05:59
Comfort as an Achievement is an Illusion
Jul 23, 201915:29
Focus on What You Do Best, Ask for Help With the Rest with Riah Gonzalez

Focus on What You Do Best, Ask for Help With the Rest with Riah Gonzalez

Our minds have been protecting us humans since the beginning. We were one of the most advanced, conscientious, and intelligent species because of our ability to survive. But the problem is, we didn’t do it as individuals. We banded together. That’s how we’ve always done it. Why is it that so many of think we now have to do it alone? Why is it so hard for some of us to ask for help? To really lean into our strengths and allow others to use their strengths against our weaknesses?

In this episode, I talk about that with my guest, Riah Gonzalez, CEO and Founder of Admin Prestige. We talk about her business that helps heart-centered businesses with the administrative work so that they can focus on what they do best by serving their customers.

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Timestamps:

[4:51] Riah's background in insurance and healthcare 

[9:47] We're the only ones holding ourselves back 

[13:00] How to get over the Imposter Syndrome without needing external validation 

[20:34] Confidence comes from being personable, a rare skill in the modern world 

[32:32] Self-awareness accelerates growth by understanding how personal values and strengths play into what you do and how you do it 

[35:46] Everyone struggles asking for help and letting go of control 

[38:29] 5 Core emotions 

[48:54] How to contact Riah

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Resources:

Riah’s administrative business: https://adminprestige.com.

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/adminprestige.

1MillionCups for early-stage entrepreneurs to get vulnerable: https://www.1millioncups.com.

Mindset course: https://thepacificinstitute.com.

Extended DISC Profile - Behavior assessment: https://www.extendeddisc.org.

-------------------------------------

Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Clap for me on my blog on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Jul 16, 201953:03
Uncover Your Identity and Emotional Intelligence with John B Johnson

Uncover Your Identity and Emotional Intelligence with John B Johnson

How do we become self-aware? How do we know who we are? How do we find our identity?

It may very well be that we’ll never find who we are because identity is fluid. It’s always changing based on our environment, culture, the people we surround ourselves with, the perceptions and beliefs you take in, the questions you ask and the answers you decide to listen to. So who we are today will likely be different than who we were even just last week, or who we will be 5 years from now.

So rather than spending time looking for our identity, what if we can create it instead? How can we design ourselves to do what we want to do, to be who we want to be?

I talk to a friend and mentor, John B. Johnson, about his entrepreneurship journey in creating his own identity in both his personal and business lives and how this self-awareness is a crucial part of emotional intelligence and understanding ourselves.

-------------------------------------

Timestamps:

[7:01] John's background

[10:45] The transition from architecture school to entrepreneurship

[13:08] Change frees you to explore an identity that's more true to who you are

[17:06] What is an Identity Architect?

[21:16] Similarities and differences between architecting business identity vs personal identity

[26:21] Good business requires deep personal introspection

[31:20] How emotional intelligence is used to reveal personal identity

[35:09] Developing emotional intelligence requires us to shed the external masks that cover up who we are

[42:53] Self-discovery comes from exploration

[47:55] 5 Core emotions

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Resources:

John’s branding agency: http://asmallstudio.com.

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/johnbcreating.

1MillionCups for early-stage entrepreneurs to get vulnerable: https://www.1millioncups.com.

2-day Launch Camp in Seattle, Seed Spot: https://seedspot.org.

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Become a Patron to support this content: http://patreon.com/humanup.

Clap for me on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Jul 08, 201958:46
The Struggle as an Emotional Man (and as an Asian American)
Jul 01, 201914:29
Becoming Unbound From Social Barriers with Wendy Horng Brawer

Becoming Unbound From Social Barriers with Wendy Horng Brawer

When I reflect upon my upbringing in my early education, I realize how much I’ve been lacking in the skills to manage my own emotions and to communicate that with the other kids around me. I wasn’t taught how to be social and emotional and while I learned a lot on my own, I also became skilled at keeping to myself. Sure, that gave me independence and resourcefulness, but it also left me alone and that much less assertive in how I interact with people. In my journey through increasing my own emotional intelligence today, I’ve been curious as to why this education hasn’t been taught in schools until now. And after talking with Wendy Horng Brawer, a Leadership and Transformation Coach who’s been working in education for more than a decade, as well as starting a business to help adults unbind themselves from the mental and social barriers that have been placed upon us, I feel so much better about the future emotional health of our society.

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Timestamps:

[4:33] Social and emotional intelligence in conflict management.

[10:44] Emotional intelligence improves assertiveness.

[15:01] Traditional Asian culture rarely provided space for emotional well-being.

[23:43] The inner critic in our mind is loud because we're not listening to our bodies.

[26:11] Connecting back to our intuition is an exercise.

[33:26] What a better intuitive sense and emotional intelligence can do for general well-being.

[36:46] What it means to be unbounded.

[42:21] What does the future hold in terms of mental and emotional health.

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Resources that Wendy mentioned in this episode:

Dovetail Learning - Toolbox

RULER program from Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence

Stepping Stones Project

Unbound

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get updates on this podcast and blog at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Follow me on Instagram: http://instagram.com/_victorung.

Clap for me on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Jun 24, 201947:28
The Harder You Try to be Someone, The Easier You Forget to be Yourself
Jun 17, 201911:50
Where Are the Men of Color in the Wellness Industry? (with Mike Sagun)

Where Are the Men of Color in the Wellness Industry? (with Mike Sagun)

Growing up, prioritizing my mental health was not something I explored with anyone. Our family rarely addressed our emotions. Sh*t would happen and we would all go to our respective corners of the house and either distract ourselves with other things or ruminate over it.

In school and in the workplace, I didn’t feel safe enough to talk about my feelings either. I got that sense that no one did, especially the other men around me, so I kept it all to myself. I played it off when I was hurt, or embarrassed, or angry.

Not only did I not have a male role model that was willing to be vulnerable and sit in humility, but I also haven’t seen many examples of men of color doing so, at least in mainstream media. I know there are many more voicing themselves now and I am so glad that they are, but for the most part, it’s still a missing avenue for a lot of us.

Representation is so important for young people. We want to follow someone we can identify with and relate to. To be able to model ourselves after someone we'd like to become. Without it, there's potential to feel lonely, like we don't belong anywhere, and that we have to do everything on our own. 

But that's never the case. All throughout history, humans have survived by working together as a team. No one does it alone. And that's why we need to see more examples of people from diverse backgrounds represented in every industry, let alone the wellness industry. 

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Timestamps:

[8:14] There are all these young people looking for help, where are all the adults?

[15:05] How can we address the lack of diversity in wellness spaces

[18:29] Immigrant families didn't have the privilege and disposable income to prioritize mental wellness because there wasn’t a tangible benefit

[28:32] Culture plays both a positive and negative role in how we perceive our individual values

[33:57] Media has the power and responsibility with branding and representation to make it safe to be vulnerable

[39:48] Technology can be used as a force for positivity

[41:08] Respect your cultural and familial values, but know that they are also subjective, so you can choose what to believe in

[51:01] End segment: when were you last angry, sad, and excited in your life?

[58:16] What is Mike up to and where can you find him?

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Learn more about Mike and his story at https://www.mikesagun.com/about.

Follow him on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/mike.sagun or at https://www.instagram.com/theunshakableman.

Find more about Mike’s Unshakable Man program at https://www.mikesagun.com/unshakableprogram or at http://unshakableman.me.

Create or join a free Men’s group in your city at https://evryman.com/groups.

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 Emotional Resiliency exercises and to get podcast and blog updates at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Follow me on Instagram: http://instagram.com/_victorung.

Clap for me on Medium: http://medium.com/@victorung.

Jun 10, 201901:02:16
How Emotional Intelligence Provides Space for Genuine Attraction with Ed Baxter

How Emotional Intelligence Provides Space for Genuine Attraction with Ed Baxter

After embarking on this journey to improve my own emotional intelligence, I’ve found that the lack thereof not only resulted in stagnation within my career, but in my romantic relationships as well. I didn’t know myself, I didn’t know what values to confidently stand behind, I wasn’t aware of, nor was I expressive with my emotions, and now I’ve realized, that was what was unattractive to everyone.

I’ve had many failed attempts at trying to “generate” attraction with women. Because women didn’t seem to be attracted to me, I thought I had to create a spark when meeting women. I tried to memorize the tactics, or lines, or ways to manipulate the interaction so that they would like me. Obviously, that didn’t work either.

I’m still trying to figure things out for myself, with the help from Ed Baxter, a men’s relationship coach I found on Facebook. We discuss how we should focus on ourselves first, and on how we think and feel about ourselves before focusing on others.

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[5:31] How settling for someone creates gaps and insecurities in what you want and need from a relationship

[11:38] Create meaningful relationships by separating your identity as an introvert from the label of shyness

[13:40] Introversion and social anxiety are mutually exclusive

[16:28] How can introverts put ourselves out there more?

[19:29] Vulnerability is not a sign of weakness, but of courage

[24:52] The tactics rarely generate genuine attraction

[26:07] What can we do to develop deeper connections?

[30:42] If you want a more connected relationship, you have to connect back to your own emotions and intuition

[34:17] As long as you have faith in your authenticity, you can detach yourself from outside judgments

[39:03] Stand out from the crowd in dating by being open, calm, and present with her and the woman inside

[41:43] You can't feel the attraction when you're caught up in judgments

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Subscribe to get your free list of 11 EQ exercises, and to get podcast and blog updates at http://victorung.com/subscribe.

Follow me on Instagram: http://instagram.com/_victorung.

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Jun 03, 201949:15