We're Drunk and We Know Things

C is for Casablanca

An episode of We're Drunk and We Know Things

By We're Drunk & We Know Things!
Welcome to “We’re Drunk and We Know Things”, 2017 and 2018 People's Choice Podcast Awards winner! Join Mike, a movie expert & tech user, and Rob, a tech expert & movie watcher, as they attempt to educate each other in a classic movie, and a technology concept each month.

Recorded in a bar, with ale, silliness ensues!
Artificial Intelligence
It's finally happened... we're talkin' 'bout SkyNet! Hot on the heels of our T2 extravaganza we've got our first deep dive of the new season and it's time for Mike and Rob to search for some intelligence in the podcast, Artificial in this case which seemed our best hope.  So come with us on a journey through humankind's search for and quest to create artificial thought ... despite the fact that computers weren't really good enough for most of the time! Intro music: Go Robot, Red Hot Chili Peppers ℗© 2016 Warner Bros. Records Inc. Outro music: Paranoid, Black Sabbath ℗© 2016 Gimcastle Ltd. Please drink responsibly 
1:05:38
May 18, 2019
Terminator 2: Judgment Day
We’re back! No more alphabet, no more poll, just an epic movie to launch our second season: Terminator 2: Judgement Day! Including One star reviews, why James Cameron is a bit of a tool, an extensive review of the extended terminator universe and one of the best quizzes ever conceived, it’s classic WDAWKT.  Wondering where the tech episode went? It will be along in 2 weeks as part of our new staggered schedule.  Intro music: Main Title Terminator 2 Theme, Brad Fiedel ℗© 2017 Studio Canal, under exclusive licence to UMC, a division of Universal Music Operations Limited. Outro music: I Need Your Clothes, Your Boots, and Your Motorcycle (from Terminator 2), Austrian Death Machine © 2009 Metal Blade Records, Inc. Please drink responsibly 
1:05:11
May 4, 2019
Z is for Zip
It's not how big it is ... er yeah. So rounding out the alphabet and we're talking Zip files and other compression algos in this month's rather technical tech segment. Including a brief history, an almost certainly incorrect break down of how compression works and a lot of trolls (of the patent variety) it's a nice enough way to end the season. And let's face it, it's the only tech thing beginning with Z of any note.
1:12:09
February 22, 2019
Z is for Zodiac
Late 1960's San Francisco and there's a serial killer on the loose! That's right, we've decided to end on a rather dark note as we slide into the obsession filled, decade spanning epic that is, David Fincher's Zodiac. Of course it's based on a true story but this doesn't stop Mike & Rob bringing their own version of inanity and slight degrees of fanboism to this sprawling review of all 157 minutes of this modern classic.
1:11:08
February 22, 2019
Y is for social networks of YesterYear
Tenuous? Yes but this was easily the best of a bad bunch. And if you have ever wondered what happened to the guy who founded MySpace, wether Bebo is still a thing or why it is that Facebook is just so damn popular then this is the episode for you. From the early 90s through to the upcoming wave of anti-social networks Rob and Mike skip merrily through a land of tribalism, hate speech, fake news and cat gifs ... so, you know, the internet.
1:05:32
January 25, 2019
Y is for Young Frankenstein
Set & shot in the 70s, looks and sounds like the 30s and reviewed by two guys in the 2010s it's time to finally explore the wacky mind of Mel Brooks and his take on classic horror with Young Frankenstein. Wilder, Feldman, Kahn, a galaxy of stars in a beautiful homage to classic cinema .... so of course we make it all about dicks and general smuttery.
55:09
January 25, 2019
X is for Bitcoin
Tis the season to be jolly. Jolly confused about Crypto Currency that is. In this month's tech segment, recorded live in front of an actual audience at Pizza Projekt in Jersey, Rob attempts to explain the complexities of Bitcoin et al to a surprisingly responsive Mike! From the early days through to the peak at the end of 2017 and with plenty of hash gags, it's a Christmas Crypto Miracle!
1:02:43
December 21, 2018
X is for Die Hard
X stands for anything right? Well in this month's Xmas episode, the WDAWKT team decided to take a look at the perennial classic Die Hard. Recorded live in front of an actual audience at Pizza Projekt in Jersey, Mike & Rob review John Mclane's first outing, determine whether it's a Christmas film or not, have one star reviews read out by real guests and even find time for a little game of guess the sound track!
1:08:43
December 21, 2018
W is for Who Framed Roger Rabbit
Noir meets Looney Tunes in this month's movie of choice with Disney's 1988 classic Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Mike & Rob review this perfect blend of animation and live action, determine if Jessica Rabbit really is all that and deliver ALL the one star reviews.
1:13:58
November 23, 2018
W is for World Wide Web
Every wondered where the web came from? Well wonder no more, we tell you in this months WWWDAWKT. Featuring the history of hypertext, some familiar faces and surprisingly little porn it's Dirty Bird o clock as we surf the web like you wouldn't believe.
1:05:01
November 23, 2018
V is for VR
We’re getting real in this month’s tech segment. Well, virtually real, with a smattering of augmentation and just a touch of mediation. From the beginnings of it all with the Sensorama™ through the wheezy, queasy 90s and up to modern day VR unicorns. Plus we actually get Mike to take a VR headset for a spin … in a pub … at night … yeah!
1:10:16
October 26, 2018
V is for V for Vendetta
Ooh there's trouble brewing in dystopian, facist London! And there's trouble brewing between Rob & Mike! This month we’re donning our Guy Fawkes masks and remember remembering the joy that is 2005’s V for Vendetta. Spoiler alert, Mike doesn’t like it cos it’s based on a comic book that changed his life or some such.
1:11:41
October 26, 2018
U is for UI UX
So UI is the bit you touch, UX is how it makes you feel... yeah this one gets dirty in a real hurry. We do the usual wander back through the history of human / computer interaction, consider the various challenges faced by UI designers in the modern world, and get a bit star struck by the team at Xerox PARC before descending into the expected level of paranoia and fear when Mike tries to work out if he really wants to drive his computer with his mind.
1:05:40
September 28, 2018
U is for the Untouchables
"Here's how you get him. He pulls a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue! That's the Chicago way." There's a degree of irony in a podcast that focuses on inebriation reviewing a film set in the prohibition but that's exactly what we've got in this months movie segment. Brian De Palma's 1987 tour through 30's Chicago during the height of Capone's power means we're getting down and dirty with the Untouchables. Featuring everything you'd expect, 1 star reviews, a load of gushing over the amazing soundtrack and massive amounts of scorn poured onto Sean Connery's terrible Irish accent, why not pop into your local speakeasy, pour yourself a couple of fingers of whiskey and enjoy.
1:09:31
September 28, 2018
T is for TCP/IP
Kid, have you ever wondered how the internet works? Well it's all down to these things called packets. Follow Rob & Mike on a magical, albeit synful journey through the protocols that make the net work.
48:04
September 2, 2018
T is for Twister
It sucked ... so anyway. this month in WDAWKT we're breezing through another 90's classic. Featuring Bills, Dustys, bits of Dusty, cows, fields, cars and, of course, tornadoes. This month on WDAKT, it's Twister!
52:18
September 2, 2018
S is for Search Engines
Engines that Search. We cover the early days of directories, the emergent search engine market and the rise of the mighty Google before donning our tin foil hats and diving headfirst into a world of paranoia and fear. It's geeky, it's techy and it has an actual segment related to Sir Timothy John Berners-Lee OM KBE FRS FREng FRSA FBCS so the only question you have to ask yourself is ... are you "Feeling Lucky"?
50:30
July 27, 2018
S is for Super Mario Brothers
Proof positive that the democratic process should NOT be applied to pod-casts, we find ourselves digging around in the bargain bin of the last remaining physical media store in the country to locate a copy of Super Mario Brothers... and I can't say that we massively enjoy the experience. But there's loads of juicy behind the scenes factoids, some very sensible analysis of why it went wrong and a questionable reference to Mario's sexual preferences. Plus if you absolutely want to know how not to make a video game spin off then this is the episode for you!
48:30
July 27, 2018
R is for Radio
Don't know your WiFi from your WiMax? Bluetooth leave you feeling disconnected? It's ok, cos this month Rob tries very hard to explain modern data radio to Mike, and very nearly succeeds! From Marconi through to modern day, come along for a whirlwind tour of frequencies, bands, cells and packets as we do our best to explain the "giant cloud of data in the air" ... yeah.
46:14
June 29, 2018
R is for Robocop
The year is 2043, Detroit is a sh*t hole (nothing changes) and MCP are looking for "volunteers" for their new cyborg program, code name RoboCop! It's a classic, it's Verhoeven, it's violent, grim and above all it's the 80s. Mike & Rob take an armoured car through Old Detroit and explore everything the franchise has to offer. You have to listen to this episode. After all, dead or alive, you're coming with us!
49:52
June 29, 2018
Q is for Quantum Computing
So it turns out that Quantum Physics is a pretty damn complex & confusing topic. Which may explain why, in this month's tech episode, we spend a lot of time talking about anything but the given topic - Quantum computing. If you're happy that we probably get most of this completely wrong then tune in for particle porn positions, 30's physicists who got some, and a pretty filthy spin on a classic computer science problem - i.e. what if that traveling salesman was selling d*ck pics?
56:11
May 28, 2018
Q is for the Quest
We never learn. With 2 perfectly decent films on the ballot and one "no hoper" we should have realised that you would pick the Quest, a 90's Van Damme action & thrill filled slop bucket of nonsense. In this month's, mercifully short, movie episode, we dissect Van Damme's directorial debut, peeling back the layers to see what, if anything, lies under the surface. It has it all, kicks, punches, head-butts, kilts, sumo wrestlers, Mongolians and a back story that's so reminiscent of another movie, Rob can't remember which is which!
41:37
May 28, 2018
P is for Piracy
You wouldn't steal a podcast? Well know because we give it away for free but there's plenty of nefarious types out there who dedicate their lives to cracking and pirating software. In this month's tech segment, we explore the murky world of piracy, from Warez, floppy swapping through to the Pirate Bay and modern day distribution as well as the very serious discussion on ethics ... and dick jokes.
58:24
April 28, 2018
P is for the Princess Bride
We found it inconceivable that Mike hadn't ever seen this film so took the convenient opportunity to rectify that glaring omission. This episode has it all, Fencing. Fighting. Torture. Revenge. Giants. Monsters. Chases. Escapes. True love. Miracles. and a guest spot by a guy called Sergio. Don't listen for the story, you know it, listen for the wonderful trivia and, most importantly to find out if Mike actually liked this most beloved of cult classics.
57:44
April 28, 2018
O is for Oceans Eleven
"The 14000 block of Las Vegas Boulevard. Otherwise known as the Bellagio, the Mirage, the M.G.M. Grand. Together, they're the three most profitable casinos in Las Vegas... And we're going to rob it." That's right, we back for O and that means we're running the long con and discussing Ocean's Eleven (the 2001 edition). Join us as we pull of a Boesky, a Jim Brown, a Miss Daisy, two Jethros and a Leon Spinks, not to mention the biggest Ella Fitzgerald ever! Oh and we discover an amazing fact about Andy Garcia, Mike's deep loathing for Julia Roberts (which can only be hiding his even deeper obsession), and everything you've come to expect from a classic WDAWKT film segment.
1:03:21
March 30, 2018
O is for Onion Routing
It's official, Mike & Rob really know their onions! Or they should after this month's tech segment which is all about Onion Routing (aka TOR) and the dark web. Containing considerably less paranoia than you'd expect (possibly because we've become desensitised over the last 14 months) we explore the history of this project, privacy concerns, the Silk Road, social impact and the unbelievable discovery that Mike has never seen The Princess Bride!
45:58
March 30, 2018
N is for Nintendo
In this month's tech segment we have it all: Monkey’s, Mushrooms, Motor racing, russian mathematicians and prostitution. It’s an epic odyssey across, land, sea & even into outer space. And, since as we all know, it’s dangerous to go alone, Mike is accompanying me on this mystic quest through the history, immense output and legacy of Japan’s third largest company - Nintendo
1:05:11
February 25, 2018
N is for Naked Gun
It's a classic comedy but is there more to 1988's Naked Gun than just puns and slapstick? Mike & Rob hit the mean streets in search of some answers and along the way find some one star reviews par excellence, some sequels that are just sub par and come to an agreement on just where this Zucker brothers films sits in the general scale of things.
58:39
February 25, 2018
M is for Magnetic Storage Media
Let's get it out of the way, there are a lot of "floppy" jokes in this episode. But then there's also a lot of stuff on just how computers store data, from the drum to the modern drive. Mike gets quizzed on a range of real of fake storage terms in Disk or D*ck and Rob tries valiantly not to lose it completely when discussing micro floppies (he fails).
1:08:17
January 26, 2018
M is for the Matrix
Red Pill anyone? In the first episode of 2018 Mike & Rob take a drunken stumble down the rabbit hole and explore the dark, dystopian alternate reality that is the Matrix. With a whole new "thing" we're starting for this year, fear not, the usual level of ribald silliness and your favourite segments are still there. So what are you waiting for? Give it a listen - we guarantee its more interesting and entertaining than both of the matrix sequels combined!
57:53
January 26, 2018
L is for Linux
Containing exactly no Star Wars spoilers, this month Mike gets to grips with the world of open source and learns all about Linux! From the origins of Unix, through to the modern distro and with a series of titillating  jokes about "packages" it surprising how much we cover in a little under an hour.
54:42
December 23, 2017
L is for Last Jedi
Warning - this podcast contains major spoilers! We've covered classics old & new but this month is the first time we've talked about a movie that's still in the cinema. Mike & Rob become one with the force and explore a galaxy far far away as they examine the latest in the Star Wars series - The Last Jedi!
59:07
December 23, 2017
K is for Keyboards
In another classic case of "it's more interesting than it sounds ... honest" Mike and Rob crack their knuckles and hunt peck their way through a  surprisingly detailed look at the world of keyboards.  From the humble typewriter, to the modern day of mind reading data entry (with a surprising number of w*nking jokes) join us as we literally run down A - Z of computer data entry.
57:12
November 25, 2017
K is for Karate Kid
Wax on, wax off! After a shocker of a poll, Mike & Rob suit up and head to the dojo (pub) to discuss the seminal, martial arts coming of age movie Karate Kid. With the usual plot dissection, some superb karatriva and one star reviews from Donald Trump, it only remains to be seen if Mike will sweep the leg and if Rob will ever work out how to get all this wax off!
52:44
November 25, 2017
J is for James Bond - Part 2
We couldn't not do James Bond when we got to J but perhaps we could have not done it in a cocktail bar. A double feature this month as Mike and Rob don black tie, shake up a martini and stare down the barrel of 24 films! Split over two halves with three bonds per half, we include Amazon 1 Star reviews and, in place of the dedicated tech segment, a review of each Bond's gadgets. In the first half, we covered Connery, Lazenby, and Moore. In this the second, Dalton, Brosnan and Craig. All the while sipping martini's, vespas and pretty much anything else JB is purported to have drunk. It's long, it gets messy, but it's pretty damn funny!
1:09:22
October 27, 2017
J is for James Bond - Part 1
We couldn't not do James Bond when we got to J but perhaps we could have not done it in a cocktail bar. A double feature this month as Mike and Rob don black tie, shake up a martini and stare down the barrel of 24 films! Split over two halves with three bonds per half, we include Amazon 1 Star reviews and, in place of the dedicated tech segment, a review of each Bond's gadgets. In this first half, we cover Connery, Lazenby, and Moore. In the second, Dalton, Brosnan and Craig. All the while sipping martini's, vespas and pretty much anything else JB is purported to have drunk. It's long, it gets messy, but it's pretty damn funny!
1:09:56
October 27, 2017
I is for Indiana Jones
I was always going to be an Indy movie. Trouble is, all three* are so good we simply couldn't choose between them! So we didn't and instead introduce a near feature length, extended episode in which Mike dons his fedora, Rob grabs his bullwhip (not a euphemism) and they set off across the globe in search of fortune and glory ... and beer. * Yes there are technically four movies but Rob refuses to acknowledge Crystal Skull as anything other than a bad dream. We've tried talking to him about it but he refuses, muttering something about "the sanctity of original trilogies" and "f#cking George Lucas"
1:21:36
September 23, 2017
I is for Internet of Things
"On the Internet of Things, no one knows you're a fridge!" - Unknown Continuing our mission to complete the WDAWKT tech buzzword bingo card, this month Rob leads Mike down the sensor laden path into the world of the Internet of Things! Smart Cars, Smart Watches, Smart Phones, the only things that aren't smart in this episode are the hosts.
46:01
September 23, 2017
H is for Hacking
Firstly, this is a long episode - sorry about that but we couldn't possibly fit the entire topic of Hacking in to anything under an hour. Join Mike & Rob as they explore the murky underworld of computer security through the history of phreaking, hacking and modern cyber warfare. Reviewing some notable hacks in recent years and casting a thought to what could possibly be next. Will Mike put on his white hat? Or will the dark side prove too tempting? You'll have to listen to find out!
1:10:59
August 25, 2017
H is for Hackers
As requested by our producer, we couldn't not cover Hackers when we got to the H episodes. Beloved by many (including all of the WDAWKT team) this piece of pure 90's nonsense proves itself to be a bit better than Mike thought it was going to be... high praise indeed! Of course there are some who don't like it - 1* Reviews has them covered but for the rest we'd suggest you grab your pager, strap on your 'blades, and prepare to HACK THE PLANET!
54:15
August 25, 2017
G is for Ghostbusters
"We ain't afraid of no ghosts!" A movie that requires no introduction and didn't really need a podcast, this month, Mike and Rob try to avoid things that go bump in the night and take a tour round New York with the Ghostbusters! Expect the usual sillyness, 1 Star reviews and a mass of misty nostalgia.
43:00
August 1, 2017
G is for GPS
Geo all the things! It's about time the tech segment escaped our humble atmosphere and made it to outerspace. And with that in mind join us for an orbital tour of all things geo. GPS, Geo Caching, Geo Fencing, Geo Cities ... er ... yes. Anyway, give it a listen, it really is out of this world!
52:15
August 1, 2017
F is for the Future (According to Rob)
Ok so we may have been a little ambitious here. Attempts to explain the future (all of it) after a few beers resulted in ... something. Starting with the Industrial Revolution, Rob takes Mike on a magical meandering ride through the present and into the great beyond. Expect the usual level of confusion, confoundment and crass combobulation.
57:07
June 28, 2017
F is for Face Off
It’s a modern day classic, John Woo, Nicolas Cage, John Travolta, some other people. 20 years old and it’s barely aged (a lot like Cage tbh). Mike takes great delight in dissecting this particular piece of 90’s action awesomeness, although he does have a strange obsession with working out just how far the “swap” went. It’s fast, it’s frantic, it’s funny… it’s Face Off!
43:06
June 28, 2017
E is for Emoji
Just what is the plural of Emoji … Emojis, Emojie? Who knows, and who cares. In this months tech segment, Rob tells Mike way more about Emoji than anyone would care to admit to knowing. Pictograms, Purple Egg Plants and Poop all feature, along with a healthy dose of innuendo, more than enough to put a smiley on your face.
46:03
June 8, 2017
E is for Escape From New York
“Call me Sssnake” Kurt Russell? Check! John Carpenter? Check! Amazing synth soundtrack? Check check! In this month’s movie episode, Mike and Rob discuss Carpenter’s cult classic. The ultimate anti hero, a truly despicable president, and Issac Hayes in all his glory but did the guys actually enjoy the film? You’ll have to give it a listen to find out!
39:31
June 8, 2017
D is for Databases
ALL YOUR DATABASE ARE BELONG TO US! Join Mike & Rob as they skip lightly through the depths of the database. From early efforts through to hipster NoSQL via some crazy stats, very poor maths skills, even worse fish puns, and the inevitable bag o d#cks. Recorded al fresco at the Cock & Bottle it may seem like a meandering mess but there is a point … honest … if only we could remember it.
50:14
June 8, 2017
D is for Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
Welcome to another month’s beer fuelled movie madness. This time Mike & Rob are discussing the various merits of Kubrik’s 1964 black satire Dr. Strangelove. Recorded al fresco at the Cock & Bottle with all the usual features you’ve come to know and love including, Nazi’s, seagulls and Amazon 1 Star reviews.
47:56
June 8, 2017
C is for Cookies, Caches and other Crap tech support tell you to Clear
So it turns out BrewDog’s Punk IPA is not a session ale … this may explain why this month’s tech segment in which Mike & Rob explore the complex mysterious world of Cookies and Caches turns into a delightfully rambling adventure that would be right at home in any pub or bar anywhere in the world. Ever wondered if the inventor of the World Wide Web sent saucy snapchats? How about the importance of the humble Cookie in avoiding embarrassing online checkout moments. We’ve got it all and more.
47:46
June 8, 2017
C is for Casablanca
Welcome back! Spring has finally sprung here in Jersey and so we invite you to join us, Rob & Mike, on our first (dry) alfresco recording of the movie segment of We’re Drunk & We Know Things! This month’s movie is Casablanca so listen in for 45 mins of insightful review, comedic commentary, occasional swearing, some little people and a lot of spoilers … for a movie that was made in 1942 so if you haven’t seen it yet you’ve only got yourself to blame.
46:34
June 8, 2017
B is for Bots
In this month’s tech segment we’re talking ’bout ‘bots! Specifically, tweet bots, chat bots and the occasional dalliance into the darker side of bottage. AI, the singularity and job security are all covered in a little under half an hour.
18:42
June 8, 2017
B is for Blade Runner
This month, we’re talking about a film beloved by both Mike & Rob – Blade Runner. Recorded in a tiny corridor of a pub, we get deep into the underlying meanings of the movie, discuss the risks of product placement in “near future” scenarios, celebrate the sheer multitude of versions and resort to name calling to describe those who haven’t seen it yet. Oh and we promise not to do another Ridley Scott next month … honest.
34:22
June 8, 2017
A is for Asymmetric Encryption
In this first episode (part 2), Mike and Rob takes a wander through the complex world of public private key encryption. Recorded in front of an inebriated, public house audience at two of Jersey’s finest watering hole, fuelled by a range of ales and with more ums per minute than you’d believe possible!
28:25
June 8, 2017
A is for Alien
In this first episode (part one), Mike and Rob deconstruct Ridley Scott’s 1979 sci fi classic Alien. Recorded in front of an inebriated, public house audience at two of Jersey’s finest watering hole, fuelled by a range of ales and with more ums per minute than you’d believe possible!
22:33
June 8, 2017
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