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We're all screwed up (and that's OK)

We're all screwed up (and that's OK)

By Dawn Walton
It is said in the UK that 1 in 4 people has a mental health problem. This means 3 in 4 don't. This is simply not true. In my experience as a therapist, and a person, everybody has their screw ups. So maybe, what we should say is "This is my screw up and it is / isn't getting in the way of my life right now"

My name is Dawn Walton and I'm a therapist and author. In this podcast we will talk all things related to the way your head works. We'll take any idea, explore the science behind why it is that way, and look at practical tools and tips for helping you be the person you want to be.
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Currently playing episode

Therapy Tails - episode 14

We're all screwed up (and that's OK)

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Therapy Tails - Episode 25
Jess the Impaler   If you have a dog you may want to rethink listening to this we delve into the military SuperDog Biosensor program and learn about how to create resilience and longevity and of course compare dogs to humans and some other stuff including a Romanian curse that turned out to be passed down in the blood (or did it?)
40:23
August 09, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 24
In this episode Jess and Dawn talk about trauma in dogs and humans after Jess has been somewhat challenged by an online course on dogs in trauma (read that as it's being doing her head in!) We talked about humans projecting their emotions onto dogs and question whether it is possible for people like you and I (but not Jess) to see dogs as animals rather than little people. 
45:38
August 02, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 23 Special guest Michael Shikashio
In this episode we have a very special guest speaker - Michael Shikashio. Michael Shikashio, CDBC, is the founder of AggressiveDog.com and focuses on teaching other professionals from around the world on how to successfully work aggression cases. He is a five-term president of the International Association of Animal Behavior Consultants (IAABC) and is a full member of the Association of Professional Dog Trainers (APDT). He also hosts the popular podcast show “The Bitey End of the Dog” where he chats with the foremost experts on dog aggression. Dawn tries to let Jess and Michael do most of the talking as this episode is very much for dog owners and those interested in dogs. 
01:03:39
July 24, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 22
What is behind the mask we wear? Who are we really/sense of self Therapist needs therapy (Jess said this) Lobsters and how it is making Jess and Dawn question the link between serotonin (happy drugs) and aggression. Is there more to serotonin than we thought? How does pain affect the way a dog behaves And just for a bit of annoyance at the end, Jess gives some sample questions from a questionnaire to find out if your dog is reslient Here is the link to the lobster serotonin study
01:10:50
July 19, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 21
Socialising what does it really mean and how should you do it effectively (obviously this bit is about dogs)  We discuss what people get from having a dog and how the need for connection can be the very thing that can lead to serious behaviour issues in dogs.   We talk about communication and how Jess can deal with something being so obvious to her, but not to the dog guardians and how she can counter her need to be brutally blunt! There is a general discussion about memory and how it works
01:13:33
July 12, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 20
Random interesting chat: Narcissism Yum Yums Stockholm syndrome Cultural differences Women being weaker Heriarchy v equality Quantum Entanglement What is love ?
01:06:09
June 27, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 19
After another attack this week by an XL Bully, Jess and Dawn discuss dog breeds and what can be done about more and more people being killed and savaged by ‘family pets’
55:00
June 23, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 17
Guest Rob Lowe joins Jess Probst and Dawn Walton to talk about dog training. Are fear and aggression the same thing? Is there such a thing as fear-aggression?
53:24
June 11, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 16
Do we learn when we are stressed? All about learning through failing, emotional states, society masks, how our physiological state affects our dog The one to listen to if you are thinking about joining our walks but aren’t sure how your dog will be or if you are experiencing anxiety about doing a new thing
47:10
June 09, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 15
In this episode Dawn Walton (Human Therapist) and Jess Probst (Dog behaviourist) are joined by special guest Gemma Kirk who is a support worker who works with kids in the care system.  In this podcast we have a discussion about taking in rescues - similarities between foster dogs and foster children and modern ideas for parenting v old ideas of punishment Mixed signals and understanding a different perspective. All parents of humans and dogs have an opportunity to learn this new information and we will have an in person talk coming soon! 🧠🤓 Grab a coffee, settle down, and listen while they chat in Starbucks. 
57:38
May 28, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 14
Jess was triggered so Dawn had to do a Rapid therapy session Some details of Dawns therapy journey
54:07
May 21, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 13
With guest star Professor Trevor Harley, emeritus professor of psychology at Dundee uni and his dog; Beau discuss emotions, behaviour, anthropology and intelligence
01:10:11
May 18, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 12
Long one! Social media comments.
01:16:21
May 15, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 11
Dog Givens to go with Episode 8 on Human Givens!
57:13
May 12, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 10
Anxiety in people and dogs Genetic predisposition Teaching children - Punishment Types of aggression People questioning fear v aggression
57:56
May 11, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 9
Dawn Walton a human therapist and Jess Probst dog behaviourist have chats in Starbucks about human vs dog psychology. If you won £100 million on the lottery, what would you do? This episode is about Human Givens and our need for purpose. You can find the 'happy triggers' quick by searching for VIA Signature strengths Find Jess at @dundeedogtraining on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
54:46
May 05, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 8
Dawn Walton a human therapist and Jess Probst dog behaviourist have chats in Starbucks about human vs dog psychology. This episode is about Altruism vs kindness in humans and dogs. Core attributes versus behaviour and how that relates to genetics.And Ginger ninjas! Find Jess at @dundeedogtraining on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
48:11
May 02, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 7
Dawn Walton a human therapist and Jess Probst dog behaviourist have chats in Starbucks about human vs dog psychology. This episode is about breeds and the need to fit in for humans, vs the weakest in the pack for dogs.  Find Jess at @dundeedogtraining on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
51:51
April 29, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 6
Dawn Walton a human therapist and Jess Probst dog behaviourist have chats in Starbucks about human vs dog psychology.  This episode is a bit different as it's a mini-therapy session for Jess as she was struggling with something. In the process of working through her stuff we cover failure and stress thresholds.   Find Jess at @dundeedogtrainer on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
55:54
April 21, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 5
Dawn Walton a human therapist and Jess Probst dog behaviourist have chats in Starbucks about human vs dog psychology. In this episode they discuss what a therapy dog is vs having a pet to help with mental health, and what the difference is between training and coaching Find Jess at @dundeedogtrainer on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
48:48
April 17, 2022
Therapy Tails - Episode 4
Dawn Walton a human therapist and Jess Probst dog behaviourist have chats in Starbucks about human vs dog psychology. In this episode they discuss punishment versus correction for dogs and children, and why people are resitant to getting help from a therapist or dog trainer.  Find Jess at @dundeedogtrainer on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
51:52
April 14, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 3
Dawn Walton a human therapist and Jess Probst a dog behaviourist discuss how humans and dogs learn, and why we worry what people think. These are conversations recorded between Jess and Dawn in Starbucks so excuse the noise quality. Grab a coffee and sit and listen in while we chat Find Jess at @dundeedogtrainer on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
44:26
April 11, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 2
Excuse the husky voice, I have a cold! Dawn a human therapist and Jess a dog behaviourist discuss nature versus nurture, depression and Will Smith in the Oscar’s! Find Jess at @dundeedogtrainer on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
01:00:07
April 01, 2022
Therapy Tails - episode 1
Coffee shop conversations between Jess Probst an animal behaviourist, and Dawn Walton a human therapist. Find Jess at @dundeedogtrainer on Instagram and find Dawn at @dawn_thinkitchangeit
48:48
March 24, 2022
Episode 50 - trauma and weight
Why does a rubbish childhood leave you with a lifetime of struggling with weight
21:44
March 24, 2022
Episode 49 - If it works, keep going
Apologies for the delay in getting this episode out. Also apologies because this is a bit of a ranty post because I’ve had a couple of knockbacks and disappointments lately and I’m finding it very frustrating
20:46
March 15, 2022
Episode 48 - language
Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. What a load of twoddle. Of course words hurt. And they have a far longer impact than a broken bone.
22:48
February 28, 2022
Episode 17 - Motivation and willpower
In this episode I talk you through the steps you need to take to boost your motivation and willpower. Go to products.thinkitchangeit.com to do the full challenge
21:35
February 25, 2022
Episode 47 - changing memories
In this episode I discuss how the brain stores memories and how you can change them. There are some practical things to try if your memories are causing you a problem
31:58
February 16, 2022
Episode 46 - what is trauma informed?
I am a trauma informed practitioner. In this episode I talk about what that really means and in what ways trauma can affect your work with other therapists
26:35
February 08, 2022
Episode 45 - how do you know who you are?
In this episode I talk about identity. There are 3 levels. There is the core you, with the personal traits you are born with. There is the clay you, moulded by the adults and people that cared for you, and there is the fake you, which is actually the real you.
24:21
January 26, 2022
Episode 44 - be like a kid to deal with emotions
In this episode I talk about brain programming and the condition response effect. I will teach you how to combine two techniques - tapping and dropthrough - with a childlike approach of asking why about everything, to deal with emotional hijacking. This approach can make permanent changes.
18:29
January 19, 2022
Episode 43 - mindfulness for those that can’t
In this episode I talk about how trauma affects your ability to do mindfulness practices and provide some practical alternatives for you to try
20:59
January 10, 2022
Episode 42 - trauma and the new year
How does trauma in your past affect your New Year thoughts? More than you might expect
24:45
January 02, 2022
‘Twas the night before Christmas
This is my own unique version of the night before Christmas poem. Originally written for the Quest Cognitive Hypnotherapy magazine and now adapted for this podcast
06:38
December 20, 2021
Epsiode 40 - Trauma and the immune system
In this, my first video podcast, I talk about the effect of childhood trauma on the immune response
04:53
December 17, 2021
Episode 39 - choosing a therapist
In this episode I talk through some personal stuff. This may be a bit triggering for you so if you’re not in a good enough place, maybe skip this episode. I mainly talk about how to choose a therapist
25:17
December 16, 2021
Episode 38 - freeze and freak.
In this episode talk about the reason behind the flight, fight, freeze response. I also talk about inverse anxiety and what that is
28:35
December 07, 2021
Episode 37 - the power of words
In this episode I explore language, including how we talk to our kids, how to tell if someone is lying, and making promises
25:59
November 23, 2021
Episode 36 - when your inner child takes over
In this episode I talk about the different parts that run your life. All behaviour serves a purpose and all behaviour has a positive intent. Which part keeps getting in your way? At the end of the episode is an exercise to help you change your parts. **please don’t do the exercise for anything big and if you need help, email dawn@thinkitchangeit.com
30:03
November 05, 2021
Episode 35 - intro to my book
In this episode I'm reading the intro to my book "We're all screwed (and that's OK)"
10:16
October 29, 2021
Episode 34 - understanding your child's online world
Do you know your kids snapchat / instagram / tik tok username? 1 in 10 kids under 10 have accessed porn. They probably seeing way more than you realise. So what can you do?
18:55
October 22, 2021
Episode 33 - boundaries and friendships
In this episode I talk about the different sorts of friendships and how to maintain and establish healthy boundaries in relationships
25:41
October 18, 2021
Episode 32 - what is your purpose
Have you ever thought about your purpose? How would you feel if your job was written on your gravestone?
19:36
October 10, 2021
Episode 31 - we all need connection
In this episode I talk about the need for connection as one of the key human needs once the needs for food, shelter and safety have been met. And I reflect on why the 18 months of lockdown have made this so tricky
21:09
October 04, 2021
Episode 30 - dealing with triggers.
In this episode I talk about triggers being like wearing a virtual reality helmet, and how learning you can take it off is one of the key ways of dealing with them
20:21
September 24, 2021
Episode 29 - musings on change
I'm pondering change right now. But also thinking about how to help you when you get triggered.
23:14
September 17, 2021
Episode 28 - parenting hacks
This episode is probably only relevant if you are looking after kids. We look at the neuroscience behind child brain development and how that can lead to problems.
25:54
September 03, 2021
Episode 27 - anxiety
There are a finite number of emotions we experience, and yet there are an infinite number of ways that lead us to them. In this episode I include a great technique for dealing with anxiety
18:33
August 27, 2021
Episode 26 - meet people where they are at.
In this episode I talk about how to really listen and how to meet people where they are at.
21:59
August 21, 2021
Episode 25 - forgiveness
In this episode I talk about how we all have our own narrative and what it means to forgive someone. There is a brief mention of abuse so be cautious if you might be triggered
22:47
August 13, 2021
Episode 24 - My therapy process.
In this episode I talk about what it's like to go through massive change and how you should consider therapists and your own process
34:47
August 06, 2021
Episode 23 - the curse of the word should
In today's episode we dig into the word should and look at expectations vs reality and how they cause problems
19:21
July 30, 2021
Episode 22 - limiting beliefs
In this episode I talk about limiting beliefs, my big limiting belief, and how you can work out what yours are
24:56
July 23, 2021
Episode 21 - what is your therapy process?
In this episode I talk about how you know something is wrong, and what steps you take to overcome those problems.
24:46
July 17, 2021
Episode 20 - my mother died
My mother died a week ago. In this episode I talk about how that's affecting me right now and where I expect to end up
23:44
July 09, 2021
Episode 19 - dealing with difficult times
Lots of people are struggling right now with all the lockdown and changes in life. In this episode I talk about strategies that might help you cope
17:43
July 02, 2021
Episode 18 - my journey
This one is a bit different. In this episode I tell you all about me; my training and my childhood. This is my 'why I do what I do' episode
32:31
June 25, 2021
Episode 16 - do you feel lost?
If you are on a journey of self-help many things have probably changed about you and how you respond to different situations. This can be scary. Not knowing who you are and how you will react can make you feel vulnerable. The questionnaire I mentioned is called "VIA signature strengths"
21:27
June 11, 2021
Episode 15 - toxic positivity
In this episode I talk again about how your brain is wired and, more importantly, how you can hack your brain to get dopamine for the things you choose
21:39
June 04, 2021
Episode 14 - why diets don't work
Our brains work on primitive programming. Diets are tapping into that in all the wrong ways. Listen to this episode to learn why diets don't work and what you can do about it. Go to products.thinkitchangeit.com and click on the announcement bar to get access to the free task
22:13
May 28, 2021
Episode 13 - helping others
It's my job to help others. But many of us finding ourselves on a position where we are the one person people talk to when they are struggling. This can lead to all sorts of challenges for you. In this episode I give some guidance on how to help others when it's not your job
21:03
May 21, 2021
Episode 12 - insomnia and sleep
In this episode I explain the default way the brain is designed to work around sleep, how this can be disrupted and give you some tools to help with your sleep cycle
20:22
May 14, 2021
Episode 11 - self care and refuelling
In this episode I describe my approach to self care. You might be surprised to hear that it has nothing to do with having a candle lit bath or relaxing. And I cover some strategies you can use to give yourself energy
22:32
May 07, 2021
Episode 10 - addictions
In this episode I talk about the neuroscience around addictive behaviour and share a few ideas on steps you can take to overcome your own addictive behaviour
19:30
April 30, 2021
Episode 9 - trauma and the brain
In this episode I discuss the difference between traumatic memories and horrible memories. I explain. The neuroscience behind trauma, and some of the ways it can affect your day to day life. And I share how everything can be changed.
23:08
April 23, 2021
Episode 8 - coping with teens and tweens
In this podcast I talk about the challenges of dealing with children aged 8 to 16 and cover some of the science behind why it can be so challenging, and give you some tools and strategies for approaching it
35:26
April 16, 2021
Episode 7 - emotions and coping strategies
In this episode I talk about why some people find emotions difficult, why we develop coping strategies, and I will teach you a couple of simple techniques to allow you to safely manage emotions
33:03
April 09, 2021
Episode 6 - Grief
In this episode I talk about the different types of grief : losing someone through death, the end of a relationship, the loss of the person you once were. At the end I share a simple technique to help you process your grief
25:01
April 02, 2021
Episode 5 - the mind body connection
In this episode I talk about weight and metabolism, about healing injuries and general mind body connection stuff. Books I suggested : The Biology of Belief by Bruce Lipton, How your mind can heal your body by David Hamilton, Love, Medicine and Miracles by Bernie Siegel, The molecules of emotion by Candace Pert.
47:10
March 26, 2021
Episode 4 - imposter syndrome
Imposter syndrome is one of the most common fears experienced across the globe, often factoring in the top 5 phobias in a country. It is the fear of being found out, of not being good enough. In this episode I'll explain where it comes from and give you 4 tips for overcoming it
29:38
March 19, 2021
Episode 3: The caveman living inside your head
If you think of the fight or flight response, it's a primitive response to allow us to survive an encounter with a sabre toothed tiger. And yet, there are no tigers or predators around these days. In this episode I explain how your brain is still operating on the caveman rules of how to survive. Read my book "The Caveman Rules of Survival" to learn more
29:54
March 12, 2021
Episode 2 - Pesky thoughts and what to do with them
In this episode I cover neuroplasticity, how the brain learns, and how you can manipulate your brain to reward you for those things you choose.
25:00
March 05, 2021
Episode 1 - how the brain works
In this episode I introduce myself and talk about how present problems are caused by past experiences. Learn about how we learn, and how the brain works off very primitive caveman rules for survival. Read my book "We're all screwed up (and that's ok)" to learn more
17:48
February 26, 2021