Why are people watching this?

This week, Dave, Justin, and Ashley watched Dune 2. Here’s the official synopsis:  “Paul Atreides unites with Chani and the Fremen while seeking revenge against the conspirators who destroyed his family. Facing a choice between the love of his life and the fate of the universe, he must prevent a terrible future only he can foresee.” Ashley isn’t convinced that Christopher Walken should have been in this film. Dave relived some childhood lamprey trauma. Just had a lot to say about angry anuses.

This week, Justin, Dave, and Ashley watched Holiday in the Vineyards. Here’s the synopsis. “While on a secret job for his mother's wine company, a man falls for the widow whose place he's renting. She is struggling to keep the local vineyard running, but the truth may spoil their yuletide romance.” Justin was bothered by the chin-kissing, and the unnecessary slandering of Fiat. Dave was amazed that everyone was so quick to forgive the morally bankrupt lying liar protagonist. Ashley was freaked out at the wanton destruction of snowboards, and the obvious shoehorning of Christmas into this film.

This week, Justin, Dave, and Ashley watched Rumor Has It. Here’s the synopsis. “Living in New York City, Sarah (Jennifer Aniston) must make the cross-country trip back to her home state of California for the wedding of her younger sister (Mena Suvari). Once with her family, Sarah learns some interesting things from her grandmother (Shirley MacLaine), including the family's inspirational ties to the famous film "The Graduate." But all this leads to millionaire Beau Burroughs (Kevin Costner), and Sarah wants answers -- especially since Burroughs might be her real father.” The team is joined this week by Jake and Ranke for the LAST EVER regularly scheduled episode of Why Are People Watching This?. Everyone found this to be a.... problematic film. Whether it's the incest or the gaslighting, there were lots of reasons to squirm. Dave tried to find some sort of message in the film, but even an extra large bag of red yard couldn't help him connect the dots. Jake was befuddled and confused. Ranke found all of the characters to be irredeemable - especially Jennifer Aniston. Ashley was amazed by the "old tech" and couldn't believe that there was a time when people used to "call" the "operator" to ask the names/address of people in the "directory". Justin could not believe that the main plot point of this film was the "hilarious" problem of whether the people having sex were possibly father and daughter.

This week, Justin and Dave watched Jexi. Here’s the synopsis. “Phil has a major dependency issue -- he's addicted to his cellphone. He has no friends and his love life is nonexistent. Forced to upgrade to a new phone, Phil soon learns that the latest model comes with Jexi -- an artificial intelligence life coach, virtual assistant and cheerleader. With its help, he begins to get a real life. But as he becomes less dependent on the phone, Jexi starts to morph into a tech nightmare that's determined to keep Phil all to itself." Justin hated the film, labelling it "incel wish fulfillment". Dave didn't like the part with the genitals.

This week, Justin and Dave watched You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah. Here’s the synopsis. “Stacy and Lydia are BFFs who've always dreamed about having epic bat mitzvahs. However, things start to go comically awry when a popular boy and middle school drama threatens their friendship and their rite of passage.” Dave was fascinated by DJ Shmuley, and did a deep dive on the ritziest bat mitzvahs. Justin thought the main character was irredeemable, and didn’t understand why innocent little Mateo was in the film.

This week, Justin and Dave watched To Catch A Killer: Here’s the synopsis: "A troubled police officer is recruited by the FBI's chief investigator to help profile and track down a disturbed individual terrorizing Baltimore, Maryland." The main character (Eleanor) in this film behaved so strangely that both Dave and Justin thought she might be a ghost or figment of Lammark's imagination - not actually a real character in the film. That's how fundamentally flummoxing this film was.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Heart of Stone. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: “Rachel Stone is an intelligence operative, the only woman who stands between her powerful global peacekeeping organization and the loss of its most valuable -- and dangerous -- asset.” Justin did not understand the AI's probability calculations that seemed utterly meaningless. Dave disagreed with the film's idea of what a "field agent" was supposed to be. Ashley loved the message of the film (that Justin and Dave apparently missed altogether).

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Fatale. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: “After a wild one-night stand, a successful sports agent watches his perfect life slowly disappear when he discovers the sexy and mysterious woman he risked everything for is a determined police detective who entangles him in her latest investigation. As he desperately tries to put the pieces together, he falls deeper into her trap, risking his family, his career, and even his life.” Dave coined a new term: side-bum. Ashley found a million plot holes. Justin is pretty sure the screenwriter has some skeletons in his closet.

This week, Justin, Dave, and Ashley watched Happiness for Beginners. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: “A year after her divorce, 32-year-old Helen Carpenter lets her brother persuade her to sign up for a wilderness survival course. Through this experience she discovers that you have to get lost to find yourself.” Dave was captivated by the smouldering gaze of Luke Grimes. Ashley was flummoxed by beards. Justin was offended at the statement that “grown men don’t go study sea life.” Everyone felt that something was a bit off about this film, but Justin had some trivia that cleared up the confusion.

An encore presentation of Never Have I Ever, Season 3, Episode 1, recorded on Aug 22, 2022. This week, Justin and Dave watched was Never Have I Ever, Season 3, Episode 1. Here’s the Netflix synopsis “At last, Devi is dating her dream guy, but some catty gossip makes her worry about taking things slow and Nalini urges Kamala to rethink a decision.” Dave does not really enjoy the overly-slick and rapid-fire dialogue, making it difficult for him to connect to the material. Justin, however, connects more deeply with the material than would be excepted for someone in his age demographic. Matt comes in smoking hot with a number of hot-takes on the show, and creates a hilarious new trivia game! Tory knows her stuff, is is there to provide everyone with Indian name pronunciation tips. 

An encore presentation of our episode on Yes Day from Mar 22, 2021.

Dave and Justin discuss the #1 show on Netflix Canada for the week ending March 21, 2021: Yes Day. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis of Yes Day: A mom and dad who usually say no decide to say yes to their kids' wildest requests with a few ground rules on a whirlwind day of fun and adventure. Justin dives deep on crows, kablowey, and the word "fleek", while Dave counts balloons and questions people's résumés. 

An encore presentation of our episode on Spiderhead from June 26, 2022.

This week, Justin, Dave, and Ashley watched Spiderhead. Here’s the Netflix synopsis: “Two inmates form a connection while grappling with their pasts in a state-of-the-art penitentiary run by a brilliant visionary who experiments on his subjects with mind-altering drugs.” Dave really enjoyed the airplane in this movie. And the car. And the boat. Ashley has a bone to pick with Chris Hemsworth's involvement in the production side of things. Justin was annoyed by most everything in this film for some reason. 

This week, Justin and Dave watched Black Mirror season 6, episode 1. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: “ An average woman is stunned to discover a global streaming platform has launched a prestige TV drama adaptation of her life - in which she is portrayed by Hollywood A-lister Salma Hayek.” Dave was surprised that this episode of Black Mirror had a happy ending. Justin gushed over Annie Murphy’s performance. They both agreed that  Kayla Lorette deserves fame and fortune!

This week, Justin and Dave watched Dune. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: "To secure his people's future, a young man travels to a dangerous, resource-rich planet — where malevolent forces push him towards a foreboding destiny." Dave and Justin both loved the 2021 version of Dune. Although Dave was not convinced that ornithopters could actual achieve lift with those weirdo dragonfly wings. And Justin required more details on how the Freman stillsuits collected and processed fecal material.

This week, Justin and Dave watched Manifest. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: “While investigating a Calling, Michaela finds a mysterious stowaway; Ben clings tightly to his beliefs; Cal comes out of hiding to pursue a lead.” Dave and Justin learned that you can't start watching this series at Season 4 - you really do need to watch it from the start. Dave appreciated how wearing an orange vest allowed people to bypass all security measures. Justin didn't like they way they yelled at the unconscious man.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched FUBAR. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: “A CIA operative on the verge of retirement discovers a family secret and is forced to go back into the field for one last job.” Ashley could not accept the implausibly small size of the laser flashlight or the facial recognition software that worked through concrete walls. Dave was impressed by the small size of the suitcase nuke. Justin was confused by the lipstick vibrator.

This week, Justin and Dave watched Selling Sunset, Season 6, Episode 1. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: “Chrishell is head-over-heels in love but may not be ready to face the awkwardness at the office; new agent Bre comes in hot, ruffling a few feathers.” This is the worst thing Dave has ever had to watch for the podcast. Justin was equally as bored and flummoxed. Nothing made any sense. Thankfully, our special guest Ranke has seen ALL SIX SEASONS and was able to explain why this show appeals to people. Or was she?

This week, Justin and Dave watched The Mother. Here’s the official Netflix synopsis: "While fleeing from dangerous assailants, an assassin comes out of hiding to protect her daughter she left earlier in life." Both Justin and Dave were flummoxed as to why the bad guys were chasing after Zoe. It seemed to be the premise of the film, yet there was no clear explanation as to their motivations. They agreed that Jennifer Lopez is a great action star, but Justin laughed a lot at the chase scenes. At least Dave enjoyed the ludicrous Ski-Doo action scenes, although he had a real bone to pick with how the wolves were portrayed on screen.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story. Here's the official synopsis: "The young queen's marriage to King George of England ushers in an epic love story and transforms high society." Everyone liked the deep(er) dive into the race issue in this Bridgerton spinoff. Dave was flummoxed as to how it only took them 6 hours to get from Germany to England in a horse-drawn carriage. Ashley was flummoxed as to how Charlotte changed into a new dress and got an whole new hairdo in just 6 minutes. Just watched the whole series and liked it very much! Imagine!

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Firefly Lane Season 2 (episode 1). Here's the official synopsis: "Kate and Tully are brought together as they contend with an overbearing grandma." Justin was flummoxed by the prolific de-aging. Ashley loved the Tully-Kate dynamic, but didn't enjoy all the extra drama they injected to spice things up. Dave was bummed that there was no follow-up on the horse from Season 1.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched The Diplomat. Here's the synopsis: "Amid an international crisis, a career diplomat juggles her new high-profile job as ambassador to the United Kingdom and her turbulent marriage to a political star." Ashley loved the realistic dialogue. Justin hated the unrealistic dialogue. Dave freaked out about hair continuity.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Love Is Blind, Season 4, Episode 1: "As singles begin a new round of voice-only dating, intersecting love triangles take shape that may lead to heartache down the lines." Dave wowed us with some trivia about how important it is to smell your date. Ashley felt that the people on this show talked like chat bots, not humans. Justin ranted about vocal fry, and suggested Dave pitch a TV show to Netflix titled Dave's Smell Hole.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Chupa. Here's the Synopsis:  “A boy on a family trip to Mexico discovers a young chupacabra hiding in his grandfather's shed." Dave and Justin both agreed that it was a Mexican version of ET, but very much enjoyed the Mexican part of it - including the luchador. Justin had a bone to pick with the flying abilities of the chupacabra. Ashley and Justin both liked the multilingualism. Ashley hated that everyone just expected that poor baby chupacabra to save the boy from the collapsing bridge. Dave couldn't understand why everyone loved the chupacabra but hated the extremely similar-looking cougar.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Murder Mystery 2. Here’s the Synopsis: “Now private detectives launching their own agency, Nick and Audrey Spitz land at the centre of an international investigation when a friend is abducted." Ashley was convinced they put real diapers on those flamingos. Dave tells an AMAZING story of meeting his lost love at the Eiffel Tower. Justin has to break it to Ashley that there is, in fact, a smoke penis in this film.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched The Night Agent. Here’s the Synopsis:  “While monitoring an emergency line, an FBI agent answers a call that plunges him into a deadly conspiracy involving a mole at the White House." Ashley really loved the protagonist, who reminded Dave and Justin of Steve from Blues Clues. Dave was flummoxed as to why they put that scene in about the TED talk. Justin had a lot to say about the ancient Irish alphabetic script of ogham.

This week, Justin, Jake, and Dave watched Shadow and Bone, Season 2, Episode 1. Here’s the Synopsis:  “On the run and plagued by nightmares, Alina finds a moment of peace with Mal. Trouble awaits Kaz, Inej and Jesper upon their return to Ketterdam.” Jake and Justin agreed that the dream sequences were unnecessary, but otherwise loved everything about the show. Dave wanted to be Alina and Mal's sex coach.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Luther. Here’s the Synopsis: “A serial killer terrorizes London while disgraced detective John Luther sits behind bars. Haunted by his failure to capture the cyber psychopath who now taunts him, Luther decides to break out of prison to finish the job by any means necessary.” Ashley hated the under-ice bodies. Dave had a lot of questions about the guy sitting in a helicopter in full scuba gear. Just got hung up on the unnecessary mannequins hanging from the ceiling.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Sex/Life Season 2. Here’s the Synopsis:  “In the middle of starting over, Billie steps out of her comfort zone for a night of fun. Sasha rekindles an old flame and Cooper ignites a new passion." Despite being "ready for sex," Dave was underwhelmed by the non-sexiness of this show. Ashley hated this the the most of anything she's had to watch for the podcast! Justin was uncomfortable for the child actors.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched You. Here’s the Synopsis:  “Now living in London, Joe tries to lie low and resist old habits, until he's forced to tie up loose ends and bond with a circle of wealthy socialites." Dave enjoyed the show, but had a bone to pick with how they depicted the blood splatter during the body-dismemberment scene. Justin hated the tweed. Ashley saw a penis. 

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Your Place or Mine. Here’s the Synopsis:  “Debbie and Peter are best friends and total opposites. She craves routine with her son in LA, but he thrives on change in NY. When they swap houses and lives for a week they discover what they think they want might not be what they really need.” Ashley hated the creeper gardener. Dave explained the Ancient Greek origins of platonic love. Justin was annoyed that nobody called out Ashton Kutcher for kidnapping those two boys.

What's the deal with eating crickets?

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Viking Wolf. Here’s the synopsis: “After witnessing a grotesque murder at a party in her new town, a teenager starts having strange visions and bizarre desires.” Dave could not figure out why the one-armed man didn’t help hunt the werewolf when the only thing he seemed to be any good at was hunting werewolves. Ashley couldn’t figure out why the first half of the movie existed. Justin completely misunderstood the ending of the movie and had to have it explained to him, like an idiot child.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched You People. Here’s the synopsis: “A new couple and their families reckon with modern love amid culture clashes, societal expectations and generational differences.” Despite the controversy surrounding this film given its portrayal of race relations, both Dave and Justin were mostly upset at how easily the main character could start a "career" as a podcaster. Ashley, who comes from a professional background working on diversity, equity, and inclusion, was nervous at first that this would be a difficult film to tackle on the podcast, but the crew handled these potentially divisive issues with ease. 

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched JUNG_E. Here’s the synopsis: “In a post-apocalyptic near-future, a researcher at an AI lab leads the effort to end a civil war by cloning the brain of a heroic soldier -- her mother.” Ashley cried at the end when the nice robot lady hugged her daughter. Justin loved all the robot stuff, but was confused as to what anyone's motivation was, how (and why) they cloned people's brains, and why the main character appeared to be a Vulcan. Dave couldn't figure out what this crazy space war was all about even through there were multiple expositions scenes about it. 

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched That '90s Show. Here’s the synopsis: “In the summer of 1995, Leia Forman makes friends with a new generation of Point Place kids while visiting her grandparents, Red and Kitty, in Wisconsin.” Dave couldn't figure out the target demographic for this show, but eventually concluded that it was 8 to 12 year-olds. Justin got outraged at the bootleg scene, and declared the multicam live-audience sitcom format officially DEAD. Ashley loved Kitty and Red, but not too much else. Aron, who was brought on as a special guest because of his expected love for this show, did not, in fact, love it.

Is boycotting effective?

This week Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Ginny and Georgia - Season 2, Episode 1. Here’s the synopsis: “The kids spend Thanksgiving with Zion, who helps Ginny through an emotional ordeal; Georgia has an awkward dinner with Paul's parents.” Ashley determined that this show probably only appeals to old ladies who like soap operas. Dave argued convincingly that the little boy with glasses had no business being in this show. Justin could not figure out who anyone was, or why nobody was talking about THE MURDER that they otherwise glossed over.

If you're all so smart, what would you do to make a good Netflix show?

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched  Matilda. Here's the official synopsis:  “Matilda, an extraordinary girl armed with a sharp mind and a vivid imagination, dares to take a stand against her oppressive parents and head teacher to change her story with miraculous results.” We had two very special guests on this week's episode: musical theatre experts Carolyn and Matt. Carolyn enjoyed Matilda and praised the many subtle details that made it fun to watch, although she hated the cake eating scene. Matt had seen Matilda on Broadway and in Toronto, and was able to pull back the curtain to show exactly how and why musical theatre gives us the feels. Dave, despite not being a musical theatre fan, had almost only nice things to say about Matilda. Justin expressed his admiration for Tim Minchin and the insanely talented child actors.  Ashley got sidetracked by Irn-Bru. 

What alternatives are there to funeral homes when it comes disposing of human remains? *trigger warning: we talk about death and dead bodies. It gets dark. 

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Glass Onion. Here’s the synopsis: “Tech billionaire Miles Bron invites his friends for a getaway on his private Greek island. When someone turns up dead, Detective Benoit Blanc is put on the case." Justin and Ranke both loved this film, and watched it twice in preparation for this podcast. Dave enjoyed the film's take down of modern culture's deification of fame, disruption, and wealth. Ashley wanted to gently cup Daniel Craig's butt. 

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio. Here’s the synopsis: “A father's wish magically brings a wooden boy to life in Italy, giving him a chance to care for the child.” Everyone appreciated the artistry that went into this film, although Dave could have done without all the nonsensical whale scenes. Justin had a real change of heart by the end of the film, having started out hating it but waxing poetic about the beauty of death by the end of it. Ashley loved Pinocchio's character arc (which Justin insists did not exist), as well as the cricket character (which Justin insists was superfluous to the story). 

This week, Justin. Ashley and Dave watched Troll. Here’s the synopsis: “When an ancient troll is awakened in a Norwegian mountain, a ragtag group of heroes must come together to try and stop it from wreaking deadly havoc.” Dave got excited by the Norwegian fighter jet. Ashley and Justin had an exciting disagreement as to how people would react to the emergence of a a giant troll in real life. Justin thought the movie did a disservice to the audience by leading them down a path that ended in the celebration of troll genocide. 

This week, Justin, Ashley and Dave watched Wednesday. Here’s the synopsis: “While attending Nevermore Academy, Wednesday Addams attempts to master her emerging psychic ability, thwart a killing spree and solve the mystery that embroiled her parents 25 years ago.” Dave was curiously indifferent to this whole Wednesday thing. Justin, on the other hand, loved Wednesday and had much to say about Romania, the appeal of aloofness, and why he thinks his daughter should adopt a Wednesday attitude . Ashley also loved this show and binged the whole thing as soon as it came out. She also compared it to Twilight, which Justin hated.

This week, Justin, Ashley, and Dave watched 1899. Here’s the synopsis: “Immigrants on a steamship travelling from London to New York get caught up in a mysterious riddle after finding a second vessel adrift on the open sea.” Kate joined the team this week to explain her thoughtful, zen-like technique for watching Mystery Box shows without going insane. Dave had his past trauma with Lost rekindled and tried to warn the others to stop watching 1899 now before they lost their minds. Justin yelled a lot. Ashley enjoyed the 19th century class struggles depicted on screen. 

With the passing of Remembrance Day in Canada and the approach of Black Friday, it is truly beginning to look a lot like Christmas out there in the stores. With local folks still feeling the effects of disease, war, and disastrous natural phenomena, what would you suggest as the perfect gift for families this Christmas? ... besides the gifts of free roadside advice, podcasts, children's albums, and live theatre. Those are givens. 😉

This week, Justin and Dave watched Falling For Christmas Here’s the synopsis: "After losing her memory in a skiing accident, a spoiled heiress lands in the cozy care of a down-on-his-luck widower and his daughter at Christmastime. Lindsay Lohan falls head over heels into hijinks — and love — in this warmhearted holiday rom-com with Chord Overstreet." Our Christmas movie expert Kailin joined the gang this week and used her considerable intellect, charm, and powers of persuasion to convince everyone that this movie was high-concept reverse-Cinderella story. Justin was convinced it was a horror film about an abusive misogynist who spent the entire film gaslighting Lindsay Lohan. Dave felt the same, and was further flummoxed by the completely unnecessary magical Santa that was shoehorned into the film. Ashley was not sure who the target audience for this film was, but was at least sure that it was anti-millennial.