Diving Deep AF- The Relationship Podcast
By Dr. Cailin O'Hara + Michael Marcinko
The relationship podcast about safe love, intimacy, communication and depth. Heal in your relationships and create the one you want. This is a safe place to laugh, learn, heal and show up authentically. Let’s dive in. Buckle up. 🔥 Connect with us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Diving Deep AF- The Relationship PodcastApr 23, 2024
00:00
53:51
Ep. 29: They Aren't Your Person If They Aren't Your Hype Person
Is the person you're with in your romantic relationship the one that you should be with? Your partner may love you, but how much interest do they show in who you really are, your interests and your life? We want you know: are they your hype person and are you theirs? Listen in as we go deep on ways this may relate to you and then come connect with us at cailinohara.com/deepaf ❤️
Apr 23, 202453:51
Ep. 28: Teaching Kids Emotional Regulation (part one: the "Parenting with Mike" episode)
Listeners have asked us to address aspects of parenting from Mike's perspective. In this episode, we will be talking about supporting your kids with their emotional regulation. Most of all, we emphasize that this is not about putting all of the focus on your kids, but on you, your family as a unit, and how all of you respond to life, emotions, and stressors. We are not experts on the topic and are sharing personal examples for informational purposes only. Connect with us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Apr 14, 202457:45
Ep. 27: Is It "Safe Masculine" Energy or Is It Manipulation?
What really is "safe masculine" energy? Take a look at social media, and you'll see countless influencer types sharing their ideas on it. In this episode, we'll dive into some of this content we call total BS on to help highlight what "safe" masculine is and is NOT. Connect with us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Apr 14, 202450:36
Ep. 26: The Truth About Bad (or nonexistent) Sex in Your Monogamous Relationship
In the right relationship for you, you can experience incredible sex and intimacy. However, we are often misled- even by "experts"- who are teaching us that lacking, nonexistent or disconnected sex is something that we can overcome or try to survive on in less than ideal relationship dynamics. We have a different perspective… and it's a really good one. Tune in so we can help you discover the unlimited potential for deep connection and exciting intimacy in your monogamous relationship. Send us a message at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Mar 06, 202451:52
Ep. 25: When You Don't Feel Consistently Loved By Your Partner (what's the real issue?)
Do you feel consistently loved by your partner in your relationship? What is it to feel loved? Is it something that your partner has to prove to you or is it a constant? Are you often thinking about the state of your relationship, feeling anxious or unsettled, and wanting a deeper connection? This also leads into a conversation around how you may be settling in your relationship or allowing for a lack of love that you actually deserve. Come find us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Jan 31, 202442:06
Ep. 24: The Power You've Given Away (the best episode yet!)
In this episode, we discuss how even though we think our relationships are the problem, there is something much deeper at play. We will explore some of the biggest ways we give our power and energy to people, places, and things that don't actually serve us or our growth. This is really a conversation about the truth of who you are, the potential that you have, and the life you actually want to live. Get ready to confront some of your shadows and take your power back. The best episode yet! Find us at cailinohara.com/deepaf and michaelmarcinko.com 💓
Jan 22, 202449:54
Ep. 23: How Your Partner Treats You (Cheating, Shaming, Disrespect) is Not Your Fault
We kick off this episode by going over an amusing one star review we recently received. Thanks, Jenny! Otherwise, we dive deep af into the concept that your relationship mirrors you. You are not to blame for your partner cheating on you, shaming you or disrespecting you. Their behaviors are their problem and their responsibility. We will help you understand what your responsibility may be- and it is likely less than you think. All the love to you! Connect with us at cailinohara.com/deepaf, divingdeepaf on the toks and safelovesanctuary on Instagram. ❤️
Jan 03, 202436:21
Ep. 22: Maintaining the Emotional Connection with Your Husband or Boyfriend (Cailin interviews Mike)
If you want to learn how to maintain the emotional connection with your husband, boyfriend, or partner… you may want to tune in. In this episode, we'll explore one perspective on the emotional capacity of men while Cailin interviews Mike. Find us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Dec 10, 202349:52
Ep. 21: Micro-Abandonments in Relationships (the Dirty Dozen)
Big news! We are engaged! Also, and in completely unrelated news… in this episode, we’re going to discuss 12 types of micro-abandonment in relationships. Do you feel abandoned in your relationship? Are you the abandon-er? Tune in, find out. Connect with us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Nov 07, 202348:16
Ep. 20: How to "Manifest" Your Soulmate... do we call BS on this?! (The Lies and the Truth)
Manifesting your soulmate is one hot topic... and here's our hot take on it! We've been calling BS on all kinds of things recently here- so, of course, we can't leave this out. We talk the practical, spiritual, metaphysical, and plain old BS when it comes to calling in the right person for you. Have anything you want us to talk about? Shoot us a message, you sexy MFers! Don't be shy🔥 cailinohara.com/deepaf
Oct 25, 202353:24
Ep. 19: Calling BS on Making "Love Deposits" and Why This Popular Concept Doesn't Work
Love isn't transactional. It's not something you measure and try to balance like a checking account. But there is a popular relationship practice called making "love deposits," which we call BS on. We share our opinions about how these practices are not necessarily safe, authentic nor nurturing behaviors in relationships. If you want more for yourself and your partnership, tune in. You deserve a relationship that's far f-ing better than managing "love" deposits and withdrawals. Find us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Oct 16, 202348:51
Ep. 18: Fighting in Relationships- Is It Healthy? (we call bullsh*t, obviously)
Dr. Cailin and Mike pull no punches and slam a common misconception that fighting in relationships is "healthy." Referencing a quote that "you can love each other a lot and still be destructive fighters in your relationship," they go deep on the problem with normalizing dysfunction and chaos with couples. They emphasize that safe love doesn't involve destructive arguments and dynamics. The answer is safe and healthy communication. Send relationship quotes and content that you love or hate their way and learn more at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Oct 02, 202340:45
Ep. 17: Putting Up With Your Partner's Bullsh*t (and why THAT is BS)
Dr. Cailin and Mike discuss a highly influential author's recent Instagram post about relationships and why they think it is utter BS. They will go over why it's a fallacy to believe that relationships are hard and the harmful ways people can see one another in their relationships that invalidates their emotions and creates unsafe dynamics. Send us content you love or hate when it comes to relationships and connect with us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Sep 29, 202339:14
Ep. 16: What "Hard Work" in Healthy Relationships Really Means (Mike Ices His Balls in a Monsoon)
Let's debunk the myth that healthy relationships take "hard" work. What does hard work really mean? Dr. Cailin and Mike will break down the differences between a) easy and healthy relationships going through hard times or conversations vs b) relationships that are hard regardless of life circumstances. Reach out to us at cailinohara.com/deepaf with your feedback- we'd love to hear your thoughts. ❤️
Sep 13, 202326:52
Ep. 15: The Right Relationship HEALS Core Wounding (Plus sneak peaks and updates!)
In this jam-packed episode, we go deep around how core wounding can be healed and cleared with the right partner for you. Healing doesn't have to take years... it can take a moment. You can erase years of trauma and move through old wounds in mere moments by utilizing safe love as part of your relationship dynamic. We share stories and examples of mending relationship disconnects, working through past pain that gets triggered in the relationship, and how easy (and fast) it can be in a safe partnership to heal at the deepest levels. We bring you up to speed with sneak peaks of what's to come with this podcast and future projects! Visit cailinohara.com/deepaf and follow us at instagram.com/safelovesanctuary
Aug 09, 202345:56
Ep. 14: Dangers of Imbalanced Empathy in Relationships
In this compelling episode, Cailin and Mike discuss how empathy plays a crucial role in relationship safety. Join us as we shed light on the alarming consequences when empathy is lacking in one partner, leading to potential harm and even abuse in the relationship. We will discuss navigating the complexities of being an empathetic person entwined with someone lacking empathy and emotional maturity. We also explore concepts around empaths and the empathic and narcissistic dynamic within relationships.
Jul 26, 202301:02:10
Ep. 13: The Harm of Waiting to Repair Disconnect in Your Relationship (Mike talks about Wi-Fi)
In this episode, Cailin and Mike delve into the crucial topic of repairing disconnection in romantic relationships. Just like our reliance on a stable Wi-Fi connection, maintaining a strong emotional bond with our partners is vital for a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
Join us as we explore how the metaphor of Wi-Fi serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of swiftly addressing disconnection in relationships. We discuss the potential dangers of neglecting to repair these rifts and emphasize why prioritizing reconnection is paramount.
We uncover the various ways in which withholding repair can be emotionally manipulative and even abusive, aiming to empower our listeners to recognize the signs of disconnection and take proactive steps to repair their relationships.
Connect with us at cailinohara.com/deepaf
Jul 12, 202352:49
Ep. 12b: Inadequacy and Validating Your Partner (Cailin Gets Irritated at Mike)
Join us as we journey together to undercover what’s really behind our feelings of inadequacy and the power of validation in strengthening the emotional bond between partners. Cailin and Mike discuss their shared traumas around feeling like they were not enough and how true and safe connection can turn the tables in a relationship. They also address how to create a safe and nurturing space where your partner’s emotions can be acknowledged and validated.
Jun 29, 202333:58
Ep. 12a: Toxic Love, Weight Gain, and ED (Listener Feedback and Dispelling Myths)
Join us as we shed light on the hidden toll of toxic love. In this thought provoking episode, Cailin and Mike dive deep into the intricate connection between toxic romantic relationships and their impact on our physical well-being. They also engage in a spirited debate about a popular social media post on relationships that they find misleading and inaccurate. They also provide an alternative perspective to debunk myths and misconceptions surrounding toxic relationships.
Jun 28, 202332:39
Ep. 11: Safe Love vs the "Honeymoon Phase" (The Danger of Hope)
What the heck even is the “honeymoon phase” and why can’t it coexist with safe love? Cailin and Mike bust out the whiteboard and breakdown why this beginning phase of relationships has run its course and why it shouldn’t exist. Sit back, grab your favorite beverage, and take some notes as Cailin and Mike debunk one of society's biggest relationship myths.
Jun 21, 202357:36
Ep. 10: Is Your Love Safe Love? (Cailin gives and Mike receives)
What is safe love? Cailin and Mike go deep into what safe love is, how it shows up in a relationship, and why it’s so important to lead with it.
Jun 14, 202301:01:28
Ep. 9: Bringing Up Fears to Your Partner (Cailin and Mike process in real time)
Bringing up your fears, worries and concern to your partner can be stressful, unproductive, feel impossible ... or even be unsafe. In this episode, Dr. Cailin and Mike go deep about addressing fears together with your partner and why it’s important. Mike also brings up a fear to Cailin, and they process it in real time.
May 30, 202351:60
Ep. 8: The 8 Second Kiss (Mike and Cailin Make Out)
Reconnecting with our partners can be hard, especially when that spark isn't always present. Cailin and Mike discuss a fun little daily dose of intimacy that can help you reconnect with your partner.
May 09, 202328:55
Ep. 7: Relationship Check-Ins and Being Criticized By Your Partner (and Our Real-Time Check-In)
Relationships aren't always rainbows and unicorns, and holding space for check-ins and criticisms can be triggering ... but also rewarding. Cailin and Mike discuss these important aspects of relationships and more, all while working through their own triggers. This episode goes deep and brings up some strong emotions and past traumas from Cailin and Mike all while they hold space for one other. Buckle up.
Apr 26, 202356:21
Ep. 6: When Is It Safe to Bring Things Up? (Hint: Self-Sacrifice Is Not Required)
When is it safe or the “right” time to bring something up to your partner? Do you have to wait for the perfect moment? In this episode, Cailin and Mike discuss the challenges of not only having a tough conversation, but the feelings involved and how finding the perfect time can be like an uphill struggle in certain relationships.
Apr 13, 202352:56
Ep. 5: Why Mike’s Happy (Cailin Checks All the Boxes)
These days everyone is commenting on how happy Mike looks. In this episode we’ll talk about the reasons why. Join us as we dive deep into concepts around happiness, how the right relationship exponentially adds to it, and basically just listen to a really charming conversation between two people in love after years and years of difficulties in previous relationships.
Apr 06, 202358:13
Ep. 4: Letting Your Partner Lead (Deep in Lemon Cookies)
If we don’t feel safe or like we can really trust our partner, we will have trouble letting them take the lead in the relationship. This can create a cascade of other problems in the overall dynamic. For example, one partner may overcompensate by becoming controlling while another may shut down and withdraw in anxiety. Essentially, the connection between you is compromised and your bond becomes unstable. As per the usual, Cailin and Mike go deep in their own past experiences around this and highlight how they naturally let one another lead in their relationship with one another. Plus, they eat and review some delicious lemon cookies.
Mar 29, 202358:38
Ep. 3: Cailin’s Wounding with Men (Mike’s Manhood Exposed)
There’s a lot of talk about the safe masculine… but what is it, really? In this episode, Dr. Cailin reveals her turbulent and traumatic past with men and the revelations, grief, and healing she’s experienced in processing it in her relationship with Mike. Prepare to laugh, go deep, and maybe get offended from time to time in this totally raw and heartfelt conversation.
Mar 22, 202351:27
Ep. 2: Do You Feel Like You're a Burden? (Unbuilding Trauma Responses)
Do you feel like a burden to others or in your romantic relationship? Do you avoid asking for help, get stuck in people-pleasing or tend to feel guilty? In this episode, Dr. Cailin and Mike explore and work through personal examples of this from their relationship and relationships past. They highlight trauma, conditioning, and abuse while discussing their dinner plans and cooking vibes. Dr. Cailin and Mike continue to highlight the importance of genuine compatibility, and as always, they discuss all of this through the lens of safety, compassion, and fun.
Mar 14, 202350:01
Ep. 1: Welcome to Us- Talking Relationship Compatibility and Safety (Featuring the Legend of the Lazy 69)
Welcome to the first episode of Diving Deep AF. Your hosts will guide you through the beginnings of their relationship journey and get deep right away. We’ll be exploring themes of compatibility, safety in romantic relationships, and when to get tf out of your expired partnership. We are not here to censor ourselves- and we don't want that for you, either. So, if you can hang and you want to get deep, tune in.
Mar 09, 202327:22